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Surprise swingers club
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Me and the girlfriend are going to Blackpool at the end of the month, our hotel is near the North pier. I fact its just round the corner from infusion swingers club. I'm tempted to see if she will go in with me, will walk passed it on the way back to our hotel. Is this a good idea?? |
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"Me and the girlfriend are going to Blackpool at the end of the month, our hotel is near the North pier. I fact its just round the corner from infusion swingers club. I'm tempted to see if she will go in with me, will walk passed it on the way back to our hotel. Is this a good idea?? "
What if you end up in the other direction and you don’t walk past it? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Me and the girlfriend are going to Blackpool at the end of the month, our hotel is near the North pier. I fact its just round the corner from infusion swingers club. I'm tempted to see if she will go in with me, will walk passed it on the way back to our hotel. Is this a good idea??
What if you end up in the other direction and you don’t walk past it? "
I know where to walk lol |
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"Me and the girlfriend are going to Blackpool at the end of the month, our hotel is near the North pier. I fact its just round the corner from infusion swingers club. I'm tempted to see if she will go in with me, will walk passed it on the way back to our hotel. Is this a good idea?? "
No...talk to her in advance...and get your name on the guest list. |
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God no. It took so much mental prep for me to step into a club. A 'surprise' would've ended in divorce. And even if I was so inclined, the thought of doing it without having had the chance to wear the right clothes and make everywhere smooth is awful.
I'd show her your fab profile and take it from there 
J |
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It's not really on a great street or very much a very easily accessed street id say.
You might look a bit dodgy trying to steer her tgaf way.
Id say that these things need to be discussed and agreed to by both of you.
Give her that respect. |
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Does your gf know about your profile on here or your interest in swinging or that you want to go to a club?
I definitely wouldn’t spring the idea on on her whilst you are away, if you haven’t spoke about it previously. Most people would want time to prepare (mentally and practically - outfit etc)
Not giving her some advance notice would probably be the quickest way to ruin the weekend  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away |
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"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away "
Ah inebriated consent means fuck all. I am so out of this conversation now.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away "
Yeah, I’m sure you can do better than rely on her being off her face. Why don’t you just ask her or tell her you want to sleep with other women? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I could bring it up in conversation whilst we are drinking, she may take it a bit better that I'd like a female to join us, she Is bi after all "
Why is she not on the FAB profile with you? Does she know about these conversations? |
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No, sorry I think it’s a terrible idea. At the very least, mention it well before you are due to go away and you could show her some info on the club and say ‘might you fancy popping in there for a drink’ to test the water. But suggesting it to her on the night (especially if she’s dr*nk) is a 100% no, in my opinion. |
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"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away "
This is compounding bad ideas with even worse ideas... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP. If intoxication is involved, then legally, consent can be taken as not given. Problems as follows:
1. It is morally indefensible to expect a decision of this magnitude to be made if not sober.
2. If she is intoxicated, goes through with it and you play with others in the club, you expose those others to the risk of prosecution if in the morning your partner realises she never wanted to fo it and only consented because in drink.
3. The same as above but for you.
Additionally from a logistical point if view, how do you expect to convincingly 'accidentslly' realise you have stumbled across a swingers club? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It took me years to build up the courage to go in a club and it was my idea lol so I’d start talking about it now and fingers crossed you might make it by Xmas  But either way, defo tell her you want to sleep with other women. I’d want to know if my partner felt that way and I’d respect him for telling me.
Good luck. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Bad idea.
Have an honest conversation with her before you go, tell her your thoughts, wants/needs and feelings and ask her about hers.
Honesty is key in your relationship.
Then take it from there. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Ok thanks, sorry if I seemed a prick but just thought a swingers club could be the thing. I may still talk to her about it before we go to Blackpool see her reaction |
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"Ok thanks, sorry if I seemed a prick but just thought a swingers club could be the thing. I may still talk to her about it before we go to Blackpool see her reaction "
Sometimes things seem like a really good idea until you start to think about them
 |
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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago
Transsexual Transylvania |
You need to make some gentle enquiries to find out her attitude to swinging before you even broach the subject. She may be offended if you even ask out straight. If you discuss it in general terms , and she reacts positively to the idea, then you can start asking about whether she might like to swing with others.
If you try to take her to a swingers club with zero warning, you'd better make sure you have a decent pre-nup first, and a sleeping bag in the car. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t think a surprise is good in this scenario! Going to a club for the first time is scary and if T had sprung it on me like that, I’d probably have panicked and never revisited the idea!
Talk about it and see what she wants
Mrs |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
"I could bring it up in conversation whilst we are drinking, she may take it a bit better that I'd like a female to join us, she Is bi after all "
If you cannot talk to her when she is sober then why would you would even think it's okay to do it when she is drinking. That's such an immature way to think about doing it. It's borderline coercive behaviour to try and get someone to do something you want but you know she won't be interested in so you looking for a way around it. |
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"Me and the girlfriend are going to Blackpool at the end of the month, our hotel is near the North pier. I fact its just round the corner from infusion swingers club. I'm tempted to see if she will go in with me, will walk passed it on the way back to our hotel. Is this a good idea?? "
what if she said thats a swingers club YUK you'd never get me in one of those sleaze pits  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I could bring it up in conversation whilst we are drinking, she may take it a bit better that I'd like a female to join us, she Is bi after all
If you cannot talk to her when she is sober then why would you would even think it's okay to do it when she is drinking. That's such an immature way to think about doing it. It's borderline coercive behaviour to try and get someone to do something you want but you know she won't be interested in so you looking for a way around it."
  |
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"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away "
I'm not going to repeat what others have said as it's all good advice but on this point, swinging is a lifestyle for strong, connected couples, not a way of "sparking up a relationship ". If your relationship is flaky in any way then swinging will probably kill it stone dead. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away
Ah inebriated consent means fuck all. I am so out of this conversation now. "
Oh sweet jesus. OP, if you cant see what's wrong with your above commemt, then thats worrying.
Yep, im out too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away "
It's this kinda thing that just gives me all the feels.... |
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"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away
It's this kinda thing that just gives me all the feels...."
You’ll do anything for free wine! |
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You’re taking your GF to blackpool to spark up your relationship and thinking of getting her d*unk then springing a swingers club on her without warning as you walk past and she probably doesn’t know you’ve got a profile on here?!?! WTAF you sound a right catch for her wouldn’t surprise me if you’re single when you return from blackpool |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away "
So it's ok when she can't give consent?
Wow legal minefield some |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Mention it before hand. If it comes out of the blue she will be instantly suspicious. Then she will think about it for a few days and become mega suspicious.
Mrs C |
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"And I obviously didn't think it through throughly "
It would seem not .
In life I find you can get into a way of thinking where there seems only one way of achieving an outcome or even only one possible outcome to achieve. That's where a difficult conversation can often bring unexpected results.
Enjoy your weekend in Blackpool, you might find some time away from home together enables the two of you to have a good talk |
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"She could be swayed when d*unk, she is up for a lot of things when intoxicated, this weekend away is to spark our relationship up. But probably a good idea to stay away "
This sounds like an absolute trainwreck of an idea to be honest! |
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