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Gendered Club Entry Pricing

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By *aldarkchocice OP   Man  over a year ago

Hull

What are your thoughts on the different pricing structures for single males, single females, couples, TV and TS?

Surely, if all genders are treated equally, this should also apply to entry prices.

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By *partharmonyCouple  over a year ago

Ruislip

It's a necessary evil. It would be great if everybody could be treated the same, but women in this lifestyle are rarer and pricing is a way of counterbalancing it and raising money for people who run events.

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By *ethnmelvCouple  over a year ago

Cardiff

How many times does this topic come up!?

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By *mTheMrJMan  over a year ago

Barry


"How many times does this topic come up!? "

Too many??

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

As a wise man once said upon these forums OP, charge it to the game.

If you don't pay that amount, dozens, if not hundreds of guys will. That's why the club's can get away with charging what they do for single guys.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Supply and demand

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By *aldarkchocice OP   Man  over a year ago

Hull


"How many times does this topic come up!? "

I haven’t come across it on the forum

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By *aldarkchocice OP   Man  over a year ago

Hull


"As a wise man once said upon these forums OP, charge it to the game.

If you don't pay that amount, dozens, if not hundreds of guys will. That's why the club's can get away with charging what they do for single guys."

You’ve hit the nail on the head

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

More single men go to these events. Single woman are less likely to go again if it's full of loads of thirsty men.

It is needs must unfortunately

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"As a wise man once said upon these forums OP, charge it to the game.

If you don't pay that amount, dozens, if not hundreds of guys will. That's why the club's can get away with charging what they do for single guys."

Yeah, so let them pay. The rest of us can choose not to pay and feed into the broken game. Swinging isn't all about clubs only. Lots of socials or even normal nightlife club places where there's minimal to no gender-differentiated pricing.

Fools and their money are soon parted I say.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"As a wise man once said upon these forums OP, charge it to the game.

If you don't pay that amount, dozens, if not hundreds of guys will. That's why the club's can get away with charging what they do for single guys.

Yeah, so let them pay. The rest of us can choose not to pay and feed into the broken game. Swinging isn't all about clubs only. Lots of socials or even normal nightlife club places where there's minimal to no gender-differentiated pricing.

Fools and their money are soon parted I say. "

I agree that it's a broken game, unfortunately you're not going to get every single guy to stop going to clubs until they put their prices down so the model will always be self sustaining as long as they get the most from the saturated market and as long as there are men that will be willing to pay for the opportunity to get a shag.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"As a wise man once said upon these forums OP, charge it to the game.

If you don't pay that amount, dozens, if not hundreds of guys will. That's why the club's can get away with charging what they do for single guys.

Yeah, so let them pay. The rest of us can choose not to pay and feed into the broken game. Swinging isn't all about clubs only. Lots of socials or even normal nightlife club places where there's minimal to no gender-differentiated pricing.

Fools and their money are soon parted I say.

I agree that it's a broken game, unfortunately you're not going to get every single guy to stop going to clubs until they put their prices down so the model will always be self sustaining as long as they get the most from the saturated market and as long as there are men that will be willing to pay for the opportunity to get a shag."

I agree. Then again, I'm not saying that guys who choose not to pay to go to clubs are doing so to disrupt the model. They just do it to protect their wallets, there's nothing more to it.

Of course it's mostly self-perpetrating and self-sustaining. There's no way around it. But that's a different issue.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It's not a broken game, and it's not about equality. If you want to go to a party that is an absolute sausage fest then go for it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's not a broken game, and it's not about equality. If you want to go to a party that is an absolute sausage fest then go for it. "

The current club dynamic (no matter if swinger or mainstream) is already a huge sausage fest now even with significant gender-differentiating pricing in place. So clearly if the intent is to even out the balance of single men with couples/single women/trans people, then it has singularly failed.

The real reason why clubs are sausage fests is because society has throughout the ages conditioned two social structures:

1) Males have to put themselves out in a public place to be seen and compete with other men for attention from women.

2) Women are just passive pickers of the most attractive man publicly trying to woo her for love or sex.

The constant dynamic in humanity's history is that of the male doing the pursuit, and the female being pursued. Females never need to compete with other females for the attention and love/lust of men the same way men have to compete with other men for the attention and love/lust of women.

That... is the root of the "sausage fest" phenomenon. And that, is also why no measures like gendered pricing will fundamentally change it.

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By *TG3Man  over a year ago

Dorchester


"What are your thoughts on the different pricing structures for single males, single females, couples, TV and TS?

Surely, if all genders are treated equally, this should also apply to entry prices. "

Its so unfair

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's not a broken game, and it's not about equality. If you want to go to a party that is an absolute sausage fest then go for it.

The current club dynamic (no matter if swinger or mainstream) is already a huge sausage fest now even with significant gender-differentiating pricing in place. So clearly if the intent is to even out the balance of single men with couples/single women/trans people, then it has singularly failed.

The real reason why clubs are sausage fests is because society has throughout the ages conditioned two social structures:

1) Males have to put themselves out in a public place to be seen and compete with other men for attention from women.

2) Women are just passive pickers of the most attractive man publicly trying to woo her for love or sex.

The constant dynamic in humanity's history is that of the male doing the pursuit, and the female being pursued. Females never need to compete with other females for the attention and love/lust of men the same way men have to compete with other men for the attention and love/lust of women.

That... is the root of the "sausage fest" phenomenon. And that, is also why no measures like gendered pricing will fundamentally change it.

"

Wow, women are passive pickers... absolutely not, I think you've watched to much Andrew tate.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's not a broken game, and it's not about equality. If you want to go to a party that is an absolute sausage fest then go for it. "

What is it about then?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's not a broken game, and it's not about equality. If you want to go to a party that is an absolute sausage fest then go for it.

What is it about then?"

Women being passive pickers apparently

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's not a broken game, and it's not about equality. If you want to go to a party that is an absolute sausage fest then go for it.

What is it about then?

Women being passive pickers apparently "

Ok, I didn't quite agree with that statement but you can't say it's not a broken game. You see how the ratio negatively affects both men and women. And it's manifested in the pricing of swinger's clubs.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's not a broken game, and it's not about equality. If you want to go to a party that is an absolute sausage fest then go for it.

The current club dynamic (no matter if swinger or mainstream) is already a huge sausage fest now even with significant gender-differentiating pricing in place. So clearly if the intent is to even out the balance of single men with couples/single women/trans people, then it has singularly failed.

The real reason why clubs are sausage fests is because society has throughout the ages conditioned two social structures:

1) Males have to put themselves out in a public place to be seen and compete with other men for attention from women.

2) Women are just passive pickers of the most attractive man publicly trying to woo her for love or sex.

The constant dynamic in humanity's history is that of the male doing the pursuit, and the female being pursued. Females never need to compete with other females for the attention and love/lust of men the same way men have to compete with other men for the attention and love/lust of women.

That... is the root of the "sausage fest" phenomenon. And that, is also why no measures like gendered pricing will fundamentally change it.

Wow, women are passive pickers... absolutely not, I think you've watched to much Andrew tate. "

On the contrary, I've not followed Andrew Tate at all. Is this the best response you have against someone saying something you disagree with? By casting ad hominem attacks on who they follow and whose ideas they believe in?

Try harder. Or don't bother.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's not a broken game, and it's not about equality. If you want to go to a party that is an absolute sausage fest then go for it.

What is it about then?

Women being passive pickers apparently "

Let's just use Fab as an example.

The chances of female/couple profiles on here getting meets and "courtship" attempts from single men are far higher than single male profiles here getting propositioned by females/couple profiles.

Do you deny this is the case?

By "passive picking" I mean literally not needing to do anything/doing the bare minimum of turning up/showing up somewhere and instantly getting attention, no matter justified or otherwise.

I'm not denying that there ARE women out there who actively go out there to pursue down the ideal man they want. But those are in the same minority as men who have no shortage of female attention and courtship attempts.

I don't see what's so debatable or wrong or hateful about this, before anyone yells that this is misogynistic hate speech.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman  over a year ago

Carlisle usually


"The constant dynamic in humanity's history is that of the male doing the pursuit, and the female being pursued. Females never need to compete with other females for the attention and love/lust of men the same way men have to compete with other men for the attention and love/lust of women."

The most vicious competition I ever see is between women competing for the same man. The idea that that doesn't happen is just ludicrous.

Personally I find the whole competing thing absurd. The way I care for or play with one partner doesn't take anything away from the way I care for or play with another. And the way they do such with other people themselves doesn't negatively affect the relationship between us. The whole thing would be a whole lot better if more people would stop trying to beat other people.

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By *mTheMrJMan  over a year ago

Barry


"It's not a broken game, and it's not about equality. If you want to go to a party that is an absolute sausage fest then go for it.

The current club dynamic (no matter if swinger or mainstream) is already a huge sausage fest now even with significant gender-differentiating pricing in place. So clearly if the intent is to even out the balance of single men with couples/single women/trans people, then it has singularly failed.

The real reason why clubs are sausage fests is because society has throughout the ages conditioned two social structures:

1) Males have to put themselves out in a public place to be seen and compete with other men for attention from women.

2) Women are just passive pickers of the most attractive man publicly trying to woo her for love or sex.

The constant dynamic in humanity's history is that of the male doing the pursuit, and the female being pursued. Females never need to compete with other females for the attention and love/lust of men the same way men have to compete with other men for the attention and love/lust of women.

That... is the root of the "sausage fest" phenomenon. And that, is also why no measures like gendered pricing will fundamentally change it.

"

Let's face it, many men, to get thier dick wet will go from woman to woman until one says yes, society hasn't constructed these structures, thirsty men have.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's not a broken game, and it's not about equality. If you want to go to a party that is an absolute sausage fest then go for it.

What is it about then?

Women being passive pickers apparently

Ok, I didn't quite agree with that statement but you can't say it's not a broken game. You see how the ratio negatively affects both men and women. And it's manifested in the pricing of swinger's clubs."

How does it negatively affect women? I kinda see how it does men, because you're paying more, but thats all. But men are also getting to go somewhere where there is a good ratio of men/women/other genders rather than all men.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'll be truthful and state I do not agree with the sometimes huge pricing differences. When I've attended a club/event with my male club buddy. I've equalled the cost between us either by picking up the bar tab on top, or payed him into an event that I've been free to attend, whilst he's covered byob.

However, I'm not going to insist on paying the equivalent of single male pricing, if I attend alone. If clubs raise it and I want to attend then fair enough. But by the same reasoning if someone chooses to decline to go then that's obviously that's their choice too

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"The constant dynamic in humanity's history is that of the male doing the pursuit, and the female being pursued. Females never need to compete with other females for the attention and love/lust of men the same way men have to compete with other men for the attention and love/lust of women.

The most vicious competition I ever see is between women competing for the same man. The idea that that doesn't happen is just ludicrous.

Personally I find the whole competing thing absurd. The way I care for or play with one partner doesn't take anything away from the way I care for or play with another. And the way they do such with other people themselves doesn't negatively affect the relationship between us. The whole thing would be a whole lot better if more people would stop trying to beat other people."

Allow me to clarify.

Females never need to compete with other females for male attention, lust or love, the same way men have to compete with other men for attention, lust or love from females... precisely because men don't compete as overtly viciously as females do amongst themselves.

Female competition is less visible, but more vicious as you say. Male competition is more visible, but less vicious overall.

Both our points are right. Both can coexist at the same time.

I agree with your point about the whole competing thing being absurd. But in individualistic societies that we live in today, crab mentality is an in-baked thing. Few people can find it in themselves to be genuinely happy for the successes of others. When societies are brought up to think that "ME" is the single biggest and most important entity that exists, everyone becomes competition in that light.

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By *.T.Man  over a year ago

Glasgow

If you don't like the pricing structure in a particular club, don't go.

It is very simple.

A club will charge what it wants how it wants to draw in the people it wants. You either pay up or don't go.

They could use different means such as quota's to ensure the ratio of men to everyone else is in balance, but it doesn't mean you'll have sex.

Then people will complain about either only the body beautiful getting selected to attend, or when you went, women were stuck up and didn't play.

If you want to pay for entry and guarantee sex, a club isn't what you want.

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By *ackformore100Man  over a year ago

Tin town


"What are your thoughts on the different pricing structures for single males, single females, couples, TV and TS?

Surely, if all genders are treated equally, this should also apply to entry prices. "

Simple. Its sexist. Yet people support it and excuse because in this game its ok as long as people get a bunk uo.

Inagine for one moment they applied the same pricing policies to theatre... Or gigs... Or restaurants...or flights.. Or hotels... Or sports centres.. Or pubs... There'd be fucking outrage.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman  over a year ago

Carlisle usually


"Allow me to clarify.

Females never need to compete with other females for male attention, lust or love, the same way men have to compete with other men for attention, lust or love from females... precisely because men don't compete as overtly viciously as females do amongst themselves. Female competition is less visible, but more vicious as you say. Male competition is more visible, but less vicious overall. "

So, they never need to compete the same way, because they're more vicious so it's different somehow? I'm really not sure how that processes.

Or is it just that men are more blatant and visible overall in both their competitive actions and their lust, whereas women keep it more discreet but not necessarily actually any less in both respects? Which does make a kind of sense as a standalone thing, but not with preface that women are passive pickers and don't compete at all makes it seem like that was not the point intended.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It's not fair...lots of things aren't fair. It's the reality of the situation and it ain't changing any time soon.

So pay and go or don't. Simple really.

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By *alandNitaCouple  over a year ago

Scunthorpe


"It's not a broken game, and it's not about equality. If you want to go to a party that is an absolute sausage fest then go for it.

What is it about then?

Women being passive pickers apparently

Let's just use Fab as an example.

The chances of female/couple profiles on here getting meets and "courtship" attempts from single men are far higher than single male profiles here getting propositioned by females/couple profiles.

Do you deny this is the case?

By "passive picking" I mean literally not needing to do anything/doing the bare minimum of turning up/showing up somewhere and instantly getting attention, no matter justified or otherwise.

I'm not denying that there ARE women out there who actively go out there to pursue down the ideal man they want. But those are in the same minority as men who have no shortage of female attention and courtship attempts.

I don't see what's so debatable or wrong or hateful about this, before anyone yells that this is misogynistic hate speech. "

I think that huge oversight here is that single guys are the least in demand.

Without a doubt, single ladies represent the highest demand within swinging, followed by couples with a bi lady. Yes there are people looking for guys, they ARE a long way down the list.

Within the club environment, events that exclude single guys are often the best attended. Partly because many couples & ladies have a string of bad stories about predatory single guys trying to push their luck.

Cal

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 13/04/23 00:30:37]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Allow me to clarify.

Females never need to compete with other females for male attention, lust or love, the same way men have to compete with other men for attention, lust or love from females... precisely because men don't compete as overtly viciously as females do amongst themselves. Female competition is less visible, but more vicious as you say. Male competition is more visible, but less vicious overall.

So, they never need to compete the same way, because they're more vicious so it's different somehow? I'm really not sure how that processes.

Or is it just that men are more blatant and visible overall in both their competitive actions and their lust, whereas women keep it more discreet but not necessarily actually any less in both respects? Which does make a kind of sense as a standalone thing, but not with preface that women are passive pickers and don't compete at all makes it seem like that was not the point intended."

I think it's best not to overcomplicate things and go back to the root of my description of "passive picking". Which is being able to get away with doing the bare minimum/nothing and still getting lots of attention simply because of who/what they were born as.

It's how you get stories here of certain female accounts whose photos get to Page 1 of top public photos simply by posting said photos onto their accounts here, and then openly bragging on their profile that they have thousands of unopened messages in their inbox they can't even begin to clear in time.

That... is the epitome example of "passive picking". Rare, extreme, but fundamentally still the same.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's not a broken game, and it's not about equality. If you want to go to a party that is an absolute sausage fest then go for it.

What is it about then?

Women being passive pickers apparently

Let's just use Fab as an example.

The chances of female/couple profiles on here getting meets and "courtship" attempts from single men are far higher than single male profiles here getting propositioned by females/couple profiles.

Do you deny this is the case?

By "passive picking" I mean literally not needing to do anything/doing the bare minimum of turning up/showing up somewhere and instantly getting attention, no matter justified or otherwise.

I'm not denying that there ARE women out there who actively go out there to pursue down the ideal man they want. But those are in the same minority as men who have no shortage of female attention and courtship attempts.

I don't see what's so debatable or wrong or hateful about this, before anyone yells that this is misogynistic hate speech.

I think that huge oversight here is that single guys are the least in demand.

Without a doubt, single ladies represent the highest demand within swinging, followed by couples with a bi lady. Yes there are people looking for guys, they ARE a long way down the list.

Within the club environment, events that exclude single guys are often the best attended. Partly because many couples & ladies have a string of bad stories about predatory single guys trying to push their luck.

Cal"

Yeah, I get what you're saying. Some men make it difficult for the rest of us because they can't take no for an answer, or because they think that blind persistence always wins the day.

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By *ethnmelvCouple  over a year ago

Cardiff

It is both sad & funny dipping in to these conversations. Clearly more men are on these sites (single or married) and they see Clubs as an opportunity to have sex. Now I may also see this site & Clubs as an opportunity to have sex, but it is more about having fun. I go to Clubs to meet guys, couples or girls who want to have fun. It is a cheap night out compared to vanilla clubs, and so long as people smile and treat it as a fun game anything can happen. As soon as guys expect sex, the answer is fuck off!

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By *atisfy janeWoman  over a year ago

Torquay

Ignore me.....I'm only here for the whinging

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It is both sad & funny dipping in to these conversations. Clearly more men are on these sites (single or married) and they see Clubs as an opportunity to have sex. Now I may also see this site & Clubs as an opportunity to have sex, but it is more about having fun. I go to Clubs to meet guys, couples or girls who want to have fun. It is a cheap night out compared to vanilla clubs, and so long as people smile and treat it as a fun game anything can happen. As soon as guys expect sex, the answer is fuck off! "

Someone tell the marketing people of swinger clubs, that the purpose of swinger clubs is NOT to provide opportunities for people to have sex! Clearly the name "swinger club" isn't what it actually means!

If I want to go to a club purely just to have fun and socialise, I can do the exact same thing going to a vanilla mainstream nightclub for a fraction of the price I pay to go into a swinger club.

The reason single women and couples can feel that they can approach going to a swinger club with the same mentality of "having fun and socialising" as they would to a normal nightclub is because they're not paying through the nose just to attend. There's little sunk cost for them in terms of swinger club pricing. Charge me a tenner to attend a swinger club monthly or more, and I can also glibly say that I go to a swinger club "just to have fun and meet new people to socialise with".

p.s. again, before anyone jumps on me, I am NOT saying that I assume every time I go to a swinger club I MUST 100% get laid as a single male. But if I'm paying over fifty quid just to ENTER a swingers club that's EXPLICITLY a venue facilitating people to meet up and have group sex on the premises as a single male, I'm not going to appreciate being treated as "just another socialising male option" by females or couples there when they pay a tenner or twenty quid to enter the same place.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman  over a year ago

Carlisle usually


"I think it's best not to overcomplicate things and go back to the root of my description of "passive picking". Which is being able to get away with doing the bare minimum/nothing and still getting lots of attention simply because of who/what they were born as.

It's how you get stories here of certain female accounts whose photos get to Page 1 of top public photos simply by posting said photos onto their accounts here, and then openly bragging on their profile that they have thousands of unopened messages in their inbox they can't even begin to clear in time.

That... is the epitome example of "passive picking". Rare, extreme, but fundamentally still the same. "

It seemed like relevant context to bring into it. But if you're not willing to back that up I honestly didn't expect anything different.

Lots of attention doesn't mean anything. 1000 messages from thirsty nobodies that don't inspire you isn't a blessing, no amount of boredom or horn is going to make me pick whatever looks the least mediocre in a sea of unwanted penii just for the sake of it. Most of the people I've genuinely connected with are people that I reached out and made first contact with. The endless parade of dicks if anything makes me less likely to consider anyone who approaches even if they do look remotely interesting, forcing more deliberate choices and actively seeking when I want something more than what I have.

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By *mTheMrJMan  over a year ago

Barry


"

I think it's best not to overcomplicate things and go back to the root of my description of "passive picking". Which is being able to get away with doing the bare minimum/nothing and still getting lots of attention simply because of who/what they were born as.

It's how you get stories here of certain female accounts whose photos get to Page 1 of top public photos simply by posting said photos onto their accounts here, and then openly bragging on their profile that they have thousands of unopened messages in their inbox they can't even begin to clear in time.

That... is the epitome example of "passive picking". Rare, extreme, but fundamentally still the same. "

And that is the result of the thousands of thirsty men, they are to blame, not the person who got to number 1 and received the messages.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

I think it's best not to overcomplicate things and go back to the root of my description of "passive picking". Which is being able to get away with doing the bare minimum/nothing and still getting lots of attention simply because of who/what they were born as.

It's how you get stories here of certain female accounts whose photos get to Page 1 of top public photos simply by posting said photos onto their accounts here, and then openly bragging on their profile that they have thousands of unopened messages in their inbox they can't even begin to clear in time.

That... is the epitome example of "passive picking". Rare, extreme, but fundamentally still the same.

And that is the result of the thousands of thirsty men, they are to blame, not the person who got to number 1 and received the messages. "

I love how you manage to twist my point and make it into one blaming men.

Is there some new unspoken game now on Fab where men try to set themselves apart from the rest to gain female attention by explicitly showing themselves off to NOT be thirsty men?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

I think it's best not to overcomplicate things and go back to the root of my description of "passive picking". Which is being able to get away with doing the bare minimum/nothing and still getting lots of attention simply because of who/what they were born as.

It's how you get stories here of certain female accounts whose photos get to Page 1 of top public photos simply by posting said photos onto their accounts here, and then openly bragging on their profile that they have thousands of unopened messages in their inbox they can't even begin to clear in time.

That... is the epitome example of "passive picking". Rare, extreme, but fundamentally still the same.

And that is the result of the thousands of thirsty men, they are to blame, not the person who got to number 1 and received the messages.

I love how you manage to twist my point and make it into one blaming men.

Is there some new unspoken game now on Fab where men try to set themselves apart from the rest to gain female attention by explicitly showing themselves off to NOT be thirsty men? "

Nope, its called being a decent person

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think it's best not to overcomplicate things and go back to the root of my description of "passive picking". Which is being able to get away with doing the bare minimum/nothing and still getting lots of attention simply because of who/what they were born as.

It's how you get stories here of certain female accounts whose photos get to Page 1 of top public photos simply by posting said photos onto their accounts here, and then openly bragging on their profile that they have thousands of unopened messages in their inbox they can't even begin to clear in time.

That... is the epitome example of "passive picking". Rare, extreme, but fundamentally still the same.

It seemed like relevant context to bring into it. But if you're not willing to back that up I honestly didn't expect anything different.

Lots of attention doesn't mean anything. 1000 messages from thirsty nobodies that don't inspire you isn't a blessing, no amount of boredom or horn is going to make me pick whatever looks the least mediocre in a sea of unwanted penii just for the sake of it. Most of the people I've genuinely connected with are people that I reached out and made first contact with. The endless parade of dicks if anything makes me less likely to consider anyone who approaches even if they do look remotely interesting, forcing more deliberate choices and actively seeking when I want something more than what I have."

All I can say is from the other side of the fence, the view here is that one would rather have attention from people to turn down and reject, than have none at all. Because at least the former shows you have some sort of attraction power on others, the latter shows you have none. Whether it's justified or not is another issue altogether.

I rather be in a situation where I can choose between options, than have no options available at all.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It is both sad & funny dipping in to these conversations. Clearly more men are on these sites (single or married) and they see Clubs as an opportunity to have sex. Now I may also see this site & Clubs as an opportunity to have sex, but it is more about having fun. I go to Clubs to meet guys, couples or girls who want to have fun. It is a cheap night out compared to vanilla clubs, and so long as people smile and treat it as a fun game anything can happen. As soon as guys expect sex, the answer is fuck off!

Someone tell the marketing people of swinger clubs, that the purpose of swinger clubs is NOT to provide opportunities for people to have sex! Clearly the name "swinger club" isn't what it actually means!

If I want to go to a club purely just to have fun and socialise, I can do the exact same thing going to a vanilla mainstream nightclub for a fraction of the price I pay to go into a swinger club.

The reason single women and couples can feel that they can approach going to a swinger club with the same mentality of "having fun and socialising" as they would to a normal nightclub is because they're not paying through the nose just to attend. There's little sunk cost for them in terms of swinger club pricing. Charge me a tenner to attend a swinger club monthly or more, and I can also glibly say that I go to a swinger club "just to have fun and meet new people to socialise with".

p.s. again, before anyone jumps on me, I am NOT saying that I assume every time I go to a swinger club I MUST 100% get laid as a single male. But if I'm paying over fifty quid just to ENTER a swingers club that's EXPLICITLY a venue facilitating people to meet up and have group sex on the premises as a single male, I'm not going to appreciate being treated as "just another socialising male option" by females or couples there when they pay a tenner or twenty quid to enter the same place. "

So, you're saying that you'd go with zero expectations... But that you'd not appreciate being treated that you're going with zero expectations, as you'd paid an extra 20/30 quid?... Sooo... You're saying that there would be an implied entitlement built into that higher pricing still?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

I think it's best not to overcomplicate things and go back to the root of my description of "passive picking". Which is being able to get away with doing the bare minimum/nothing and still getting lots of attention simply because of who/what they were born as.

It's how you get stories here of certain female accounts whose photos get to Page 1 of top public photos simply by posting said photos onto their accounts here, and then openly bragging on their profile that they have thousands of unopened messages in their inbox they can't even begin to clear in time.

That... is the epitome example of "passive picking". Rare, extreme, but fundamentally still the same.

And that is the result of the thousands of thirsty men, they are to blame, not the person who got to number 1 and received the messages.

I love how you manage to twist my point and make it into one blaming men.

Is there some new unspoken game now on Fab where men try to set themselves apart from the rest to gain female attention by explicitly showing themselves off to NOT be thirsty men?

Nope, its called being a decent person "

Again with the ad hominem attacks. Thanks for proving my point by playing the man not the ball.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *ethnmelvCouple  over a year ago

Cardiff


"It is both sad & funny dipping in to these conversations. Clearly more men are on these sites (single or married) and they see Clubs as an opportunity to have sex. Now I may also see this site & Clubs as an opportunity to have sex, but it is more about having fun. I go to Clubs to meet guys, couples or girls who want to have fun. It is a cheap night out compared to vanilla clubs, and so long as people smile and treat it as a fun game anything can happen. As soon as guys expect sex, the answer is fuck off!

Someone tell the marketing people of swinger clubs, that the purpose of swinger clubs is NOT to provide opportunities for people to have sex! Clearly the name "swinger club" isn't what it actually means!

If I want to go to a club purely just to have fun and socialise, I can do the exact same thing going to a vanilla mainstream nightclub for a fraction of the price I pay to go into a swinger club.

The reason single women and couples can feel that they can approach going to a swinger club with the same mentality of "having fun and socialising" as they would to a normal nightclub is because they're not paying through the nose just to attend. There's little sunk cost for them in terms of swinger club pricing. Charge me a tenner to attend a swinger club monthly or more, and I can also glibly say that I go to a swinger club "just to have fun and meet new people to socialise with".

p.s. again, before anyone jumps on me, I am NOT saying that I assume every time I go to a swinger club I MUST 100% get laid as a single male. But if I'm paying over fifty quid just to ENTER a swingers club that's EXPLICITLY a venue facilitating people to meet up and have group sex on the premises as a single male, I'm not going to appreciate being treated as "just another socialising male option" by females or couples there when they pay a tenner or twenty quid to enter the same place. "

Feeling entitled to have your way will come over in conversation with people. Just go and talk to people rather than expect ‘payback’ for your £50. Everyone in a Club is entitled to say ‘no’, no matter what they paid to come in!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

I think it's best not to overcomplicate things and go back to the root of my description of "passive picking". Which is being able to get away with doing the bare minimum/nothing and still getting lots of attention simply because of who/what they were born as.

It's how you get stories here of certain female accounts whose photos get to Page 1 of top public photos simply by posting said photos onto their accounts here, and then openly bragging on their profile that they have thousands of unopened messages in their inbox they can't even begin to clear in time.

That... is the epitome example of "passive picking". Rare, extreme, but fundamentally still the same.

And that is the result of the thousands of thirsty men, they are to blame, not the person who got to number 1 and received the messages.

I love how you manage to twist my point and make it into one blaming men.

Is there some new unspoken game now on Fab where men try to set themselves apart from the rest to gain female attention by explicitly showing themselves off to NOT be thirsty men? "

You can be thirsty but not act like a dick....

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

So, you're saying that you'd go with zero expectations... But that you'd not appreciate being treated that you're going with zero expectations, as you'd paid an extra 20/30 quid?... Sooo... You're saying that there would be an implied entitlement built into that higher pricing still? "

Yes.

The same as how you wouldn't want to be treated for granted with the bare minimum of customer service and food quality if you pay a hundred quid for a posh restaurant, as opposed to you just popping into a takeaway to buy a burger and chips for less than five quid. It's innate human nature to peg higher costs with higher expectations. It's not just something applicable to swinger club admission prices.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

I think it's best not to overcomplicate things and go back to the root of my description of "passive picking". Which is being able to get away with doing the bare minimum/nothing and still getting lots of attention simply because of who/what they were born as.

It's how you get stories here of certain female accounts whose photos get to Page 1 of top public photos simply by posting said photos onto their accounts here, and then openly bragging on their profile that they have thousands of unopened messages in their inbox they can't even begin to clear in time.

That... is the epitome example of "passive picking". Rare, extreme, but fundamentally still the same.

And that is the result of the thousands of thirsty men, they are to blame, not the person who got to number 1 and received the messages.

I love how you manage to twist my point and make it into one blaming men.

Is there some new unspoken game now on Fab where men try to set themselves apart from the rest to gain female attention by explicitly showing themselves off to NOT be thirsty men?

You can be thirsty but not act like a dick.... "

Good thing I don't act like one then! I can't stop others from thinking I do, offence is taken not given, and trust me if I want to give offence/be a dick to others I am VERY explicit about it.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

I think it's best not to overcomplicate things and go back to the root of my description of "passive picking". Which is being able to get away with doing the bare minimum/nothing and still getting lots of attention simply because of who/what they were born as.

It's how you get stories here of certain female accounts whose photos get to Page 1 of top public photos simply by posting said photos onto their accounts here, and then openly bragging on their profile that they have thousands of unopened messages in their inbox they can't even begin to clear in time.

That... is the epitome example of "passive picking". Rare, extreme, but fundamentally still the same.

And that is the result of the thousands of thirsty men, they are to blame, not the person who got to number 1 and received the messages.

I love how you manage to twist my point and make it into one blaming men.

Is there some new unspoken game now on Fab where men try to set themselves apart from the rest to gain female attention by explicitly showing themselves off to NOT be thirsty men?

Nope, its called being a decent person

Again with the ad hominem attacks. Thanks for proving my point by playing the man not the ball. "

Echo chamber

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *hrista BellendWoman  over a year ago

Delightful Bliss


"It is both sad & funny dipping in to these conversations. Clearly more men are on these sites (single or married) and they see Clubs as an opportunity to have sex. Now I may also see this site & Clubs as an opportunity to have sex, but it is more about having fun. I go to Clubs to meet guys, couples or girls who want to have fun. It is a cheap night out compared to vanilla clubs, and so long as people smile and treat it as a fun game anything can happen. As soon as guys expect sex, the answer is fuck off!

Someone tell the marketing people of swinger clubs, that the purpose of swinger clubs is NOT to provide opportunities for people to have sex! Clearly the name "swinger club" isn't what it actually means!

If I want to go to a club purely just to have fun and socialise, I can do the exact same thing going to a vanilla mainstream nightclub for a fraction of the price I pay to go into a swinger club.

The reason single women and couples can feel that they can approach going to a swinger club with the same mentality of "having fun and socialising" as they would to a normal nightclub is because they're not paying through the nose just to attend. There's little sunk cost for them in terms of swinger club pricing. Charge me a tenner to attend a swinger club monthly or more, and I can also glibly say that I go to a swinger club "just to have fun and meet new people to socialise with".

p.s. again, before anyone jumps on me, I am NOT saying that I assume every time I go to a swinger club I MUST 100% get laid as a single male. But if I'm paying over fifty quid just to ENTER a swingers club that's EXPLICITLY a venue facilitating people to meet up and have group sex on the premises as a single male, I'm not going to appreciate being treated as "just another socialising male option" by females or couples there when they pay a tenner or twenty quid to enter the same place. "

A swingers club is a place which provides facilities for people to have sex, nothing more.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *mTheMrJMan  over a year ago

Barry


"

And that is the result of the thousands of thirsty men, they are to blame, not the person who got to number 1 and received the messages.

I love how you manage to twist my point and make it into one blaming men.

Is there some new unspoken game now on Fab where men try to set themselves apart from the rest to gain female attention by explicitly showing themselves off to NOT be thirsty men? "

And I love how you miss my point which in no way twists yours.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *reyToTheFairiesWoman  over a year ago

Carlisle usually


"All I can say is from the other side of the fence, the view here is that one would rather have attention from people to turn down and reject, than have none at all. Because at least the former shows you have some sort of attraction power on others, the latter shows you have none. Whether it's justified or not is another issue altogether.

I rather be in a situation where I can choose between options, than have no options available at all. "

Being physically attractive isn't all that. I'm more interested in the actual people my partners are, and knowing that most other people just see me as pretty fuckmeat does not bring me joy. The grass is always greener.

1000 terrible options with 0 that actually appeeal is no better than 0 options. It's better to be alone in peace than alone and surrounded by screaming idiots.

And if you think paying £50 should guarantee you sex, I'm sure there's some back alley places you can make that happen without ruining clubs for the clientele that enjoy them as they are

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Feeling entitled to have your way will come over in conversation with people. Just go and talk to people rather than expect ‘payback’ for your £50. Everyone in a Club is entitled to say ‘no’, no matter what they paid to come in! "

Where have I said that I don't accept that everyone in a club is entitled to say no? I can accept that as reality, doesn't mean I have to be happy about it at the end of the night when I think back on how much better of a night I could have had if I spent the same money elsewhere?

Moot point really, considering that I've only attended clubs a couple of times as a +! to other couples, never like swinger club environments, and have no intentions again of going to one.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"All I can say is from the other side of the fence, the view here is that one would rather have attention from people to turn down and reject, than have none at all. Because at least the former shows you have some sort of attraction power on others, the latter shows you have none. Whether it's justified or not is another issue altogether.

I rather be in a situation where I can choose between options, than have no options available at all.

Being physically attractive isn't all that. I'm more interested in the actual people my partners are, and knowing that most other people just see me as pretty fuckmeat does not bring me joy. The grass is always greener.

1000 terrible options with 0 that actually appeeal is no better than 0 options. It's better to be alone in peace than alone and surrounded by screaming idiots.

And if you think paying £50 should guarantee you sex, I'm sure there's some back alley places you can make that happen without ruining clubs for the clientele that enjoy them as they are "

Where did I say that I think paying £50 should guarantee me sex? Please, quote me the exact line where I said so.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It is both sad & funny dipping in to these conversations. Clearly more men are on these sites (single or married) and they see Clubs as an opportunity to have sex. Now I may also see this site & Clubs as an opportunity to have sex, but it is more about having fun. I go to Clubs to meet guys, couples or girls who want to have fun. It is a cheap night out compared to vanilla clubs, and so long as people smile and treat it as a fun game anything can happen. As soon as guys expect sex, the answer is fuck off!

Someone tell the marketing people of swinger clubs, that the purpose of swinger clubs is NOT to provide opportunities for people to have sex! Clearly the name "swinger club" isn't what it actually means!

If I want to go to a club purely just to have fun and socialise, I can do the exact same thing going to a vanilla mainstream nightclub for a fraction of the price I pay to go into a swinger club.

The reason single women and couples can feel that they can approach going to a swinger club with the same mentality of "having fun and socialising" as they would to a normal nightclub is because they're not paying through the nose just to attend. There's little sunk cost for them in terms of swinger club pricing. Charge me a tenner to attend a swinger club monthly or more, and I can also glibly say that I go to a swinger club "just to have fun and meet new people to socialise with".

p.s. again, before anyone jumps on me, I am NOT saying that I assume every time I go to a swinger club I MUST 100% get laid as a single male. But if I'm paying over fifty quid just to ENTER a swingers club that's EXPLICITLY a venue facilitating people to meet up and have group sex on the premises as a single male, I'm not going to appreciate being treated as "just another socialising male option" by females or couples there when they pay a tenner or twenty quid to enter the same place.

A swingers club is a place which provides facilities for people to have sex, nothing more."

A hotel also provides facilities for people to have sex, no? So what differentiates a hotel from a swingers club?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

And that is the result of the thousands of thirsty men, they are to blame, not the person who got to number 1 and received the messages.

I love how you manage to twist my point and make it into one blaming men.

Is there some new unspoken game now on Fab where men try to set themselves apart from the rest to gain female attention by explicitly showing themselves off to NOT be thirsty men?

And I love how you miss my point which in no way twists yours.

"

OK, jog right on. Thanks.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *alandNitaCouple  over a year ago

Scunthorpe


"

Someone tell the marketing people of swinger clubs, that the purpose of swinger clubs is NOT to provide opportunities for people to have sex! Clearly the name "swinger club" isn't what it actually means!

If I want to go to a club purely just to have fun and socialise, I can do the exact same thing going to a vanilla mainstream nightclub for a fraction of the price I pay to go into a swinger club.

The reason single women and couples can feel that they can approach going to a swinger club with the same mentality of "having fun and socialising" as they would to a normal nightclub is because they're not paying through the nose just to attend. There's little sunk cost for them in terms of swinger club pricing. Charge me a tenner to attend a swinger club monthly or more, and I can also glibly say that I go to a swinger club "just to have fun and meet new people to socialise with". "

I would argue that clubs are only offering the opportunity to be in the same room as like minded people.

Many clubs will (wrongly) assume that a high entry cost will filter out "undesirable" guys, as if somehow having disposable income makes you a better person.

The alternative model applied by some clubs, is to allow only a limited number of guys in & and to apply "quality control" to ensure that they're the appropriate "type" of guys. The issue then, is that you will get the same group of guys all the time & it is very hard to get onto the approved list... plus, it makes assumptions that the person picking the guys is choosing the "right" guys for everyone... which also seems unlikely.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

I think it's best not to overcomplicate things and go back to the root of my description of "passive picking". Which is being able to get away with doing the bare minimum/nothing and still getting lots of attention simply because of who/what they were born as.

It's how you get stories here of certain female accounts whose photos get to Page 1 of top public photos simply by posting said photos onto their accounts here, and then openly bragging on their profile that they have thousands of unopened messages in their inbox they can't even begin to clear in time.

That... is the epitome example of "passive picking". Rare, extreme, but fundamentally still the same.

And that is the result of the thousands of thirsty men, they are to blame, not the person who got to number 1 and received the messages.

I love how you manage to twist my point and make it into one blaming men.

Is there some new unspoken game now on Fab where men try to set themselves apart from the rest to gain female attention by explicitly showing themselves off to NOT be thirsty men?

Nope, its called being a decent person

Again with the ad hominem attacks. Thanks for proving my point by playing the man not the ball.

Echo chamber "

You'll find that the only echo chamber that exists here is the one that your viewpoint is the majority of.

It's me against how many of you here, yet I'm the one accused of turning this into an echo chamber?

Since clearly my input and perspective as a single man isn't appreciated, time for me to dip out and everyone to jump in to bash me out and make me look like the kind of man nobody wants in a swinger club!

Ta-ra.

p.s. my block list has grown a lot tonight, thanks!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *ethnmelvCouple  over a year ago

Cardiff


"

Feeling entitled to have your way will come over in conversation with people. Just go and talk to people rather than expect ‘payback’ for your £50. Everyone in a Club is entitled to say ‘no’, no matter what they paid to come in!

Where have I said that I don't accept that everyone in a club is entitled to say no? I can accept that as reality, doesn't mean I have to be happy about it at the end of the night when I think back on how much better of a night I could have had if I spent the same money elsewhere?

Moot point really, considering that I've only attended clubs a couple of times as a +! to other couples, never like swinger club environments, and have no intentions again of going to one. "

You will not be missed…

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

I think it's best not to overcomplicate things and go back to the root of my description of "passive picking". Which is being able to get away with doing the bare minimum/nothing and still getting lots of attention simply because of who/what they were born as.

It's how you get stories here of certain female accounts whose photos get to Page 1 of top public photos simply by posting said photos onto their accounts here, and then openly bragging on their profile that they have thousands of unopened messages in their inbox they can't even begin to clear in time.

That... is the epitome example of "passive picking". Rare, extreme, but fundamentally still the same.

And that is the result of the thousands of thirsty men, they are to blame, not the person who got to number 1 and received the messages.

I love how you manage to twist my point and make it into one blaming men.

Is there some new unspoken game now on Fab where men try to set themselves apart from the rest to gain female attention by explicitly showing themselves off to NOT be thirsty men?

Nope, its called being a decent person

Again with the ad hominem attacks. Thanks for proving my point by playing the man not the ball.

Echo chamber

You'll find that the only echo chamber that exists here is the one that your viewpoint is the majority of.

It's me against how many of you here, yet I'm the one accused of turning this into an echo chamber?

Since clearly my input and perspective as a single man isn't appreciated, time for me to dip out and everyone to jump in to bash me out and make me look like the kind of man nobody wants in a swinger club!

Ta-ra.

p.s. my block list has grown a lot tonight, thanks! "

Echo...echo...echo...

Byeeeeeee

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *mTheMrJMan  over a year ago

Barry


"

And that is the result of the thousands of thirsty men, they are to blame, not the person who got to number 1 and received the messages.

I love how you manage to twist my point and make it into one blaming men.

Is there some new unspoken game now on Fab where men try to set themselves apart from the rest to gain female attention by explicitly showing themselves off to NOT be thirsty men?

And I love how you miss my point which in no way twists yours.

OK, jog right on. Thanks. "

Maybe you should do just that

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Someone tell the marketing people of swinger clubs, that the purpose of swinger clubs is NOT to provide opportunities for people to have sex! Clearly the name "swinger club" isn't what it actually means!

If I want to go to a club purely just to have fun and socialise, I can do the exact same thing going to a vanilla mainstream nightclub for a fraction of the price I pay to go into a swinger club.

The reason single women and couples can feel that they can approach going to a swinger club with the same mentality of "having fun and socialising" as they would to a normal nightclub is because they're not paying through the nose just to attend. There's little sunk cost for them in terms of swinger club pricing. Charge me a tenner to attend a swinger club monthly or more, and I can also glibly say that I go to a swinger club "just to have fun and meet new people to socialise with".

I would argue that clubs are only offering the opportunity to be in the same room as like minded people.

Many clubs will (wrongly) assume that a high entry cost will filter out "undesirable" guys, as if somehow having disposable income makes you a better person.

The alternative model applied by some clubs, is to allow only a limited number of guys in & and to apply "quality control" to ensure that they're the appropriate "type" of guys. The issue then, is that you will get the same group of guys all the time & it is very hard to get onto the approved list... plus, it makes assumptions that the person picking the guys is choosing the "right" guys for everyone... which also seems unlikely."

It's not an easy scenario to solve. I appreciate and understand what you're saying. Thanks for being sensible and civil.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *ina VonteeseTV/TS  over a year ago

Leicester


"How many times does this topic come up!?

Too many?? "

sadly too many times

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *ethnmelvCouple  over a year ago

Cardiff


"How many times does this topic come up!?

Too many?? sadly too many times "

…yep

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Feeling entitled to have your way will come over in conversation with people. Just go and talk to people rather than expect ‘payback’ for your £50. Everyone in a Club is entitled to say ‘no’, no matter what they paid to come in!

Where have I said that I don't accept that everyone in a club is entitled to say no? I can accept that as reality, doesn't mean I have to be happy about it at the end of the night when I think back on how much better of a night I could have had if I spent the same money elsewhere?

Moot point really, considering that I've only attended clubs a couple of times as a +! to other couples, never like swinger club environments, and have no intentions again of going to one.

You will not be missed… "

I'm already not missed by the vast majority of Fab anyway just like most single male profiles on here, what's a few more from this thread?

Seriously, it's funny how saying "you will not be missed" or anything along that line is seen as giving the person saying it some sort of mythical "moral/intellectual/social high ground".

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *reyToTheFairiesWoman  over a year ago

Carlisle usually


"Where did I say that I think paying £50 should guarantee me sex? Please, quote me the exact line where I said so. "

Of course. Skip right over the rest

It's the implication of your words dear. The idea that the people who are paying less to enter somehow owe you something because you're in a less desired demographic. How dare they view it as a social thing when you're paying more and expect the sexy sex that swingers clubs are there to facilitate? All in all, it's pretty gross.

And I'm far too tired to continue when it's obvious that you're set in your ways and unwilling to empathise or consider other human viewpoints. So goodnight

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *ethnmelvCouple  over a year ago

Cardiff


"

Feeling entitled to have your way will come over in conversation with people. Just go and talk to people rather than expect ‘payback’ for your £50. Everyone in a Club is entitled to say ‘no’, no matter what they paid to come in!

Where have I said that I don't accept that everyone in a club is entitled to say no? I can accept that as reality, doesn't mean I have to be happy about it at the end of the night when I think back on how much better of a night I could have had if I spent the same money elsewhere?

Moot point really, considering that I've only attended clubs a couple of times as a +! to other couples, never like swinger club environments, and have no intentions again of going to one.

You will not be missed…

I'm already not missed by the vast majority of Fab anyway just like most single male profiles on here, what's a few more from this thread?

Seriously, it's funny how saying "you will not be missed" or anything along that line is seen as giving the person saying it some sort of mythical "moral/intellectual/social high ground". "

Sorry, quite the opposite…

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Feeling entitled to have your way will come over in conversation with people. Just go and talk to people rather than expect ‘payback’ for your £50. Everyone in a Club is entitled to say ‘no’, no matter what they paid to come in!

Where have I said that I don't accept that everyone in a club is entitled to say no? I can accept that as reality, doesn't mean I have to be happy about it at the end of the night when I think back on how much better of a night I could have had if I spent the same money elsewhere?

Moot point really, considering that I've only attended clubs a couple of times as a +! to other couples, never like swinger club environments, and have no intentions again of going to one.

You will not be missed…

I'm already not missed by the vast majority of Fab anyway just like most single male profiles on here, what's a few more from this thread?

Seriously, it's funny how saying "you will not be missed" or anything along that line is seen as giving the person saying it some sort of mythical "moral/intellectual/social high ground".

Sorry, quite the opposite…"

So why even say something that's an explicit putdown to me or anybody then? Doesn't that give you the perceived high ground over me because you think I'm someone who won't be missed because you have a low/bad opinion of me? What makes you think I even care about being missed on an online forum or in a niche lifestyle like swinging? I've walked away from this life at least thrice in my life, caring about whether anyone misses me or not isn't something that even comes across my mind.

Bottomline, please don't assume things about me. You're better than that.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Feeling entitled to have your way will come over in conversation with people. Just go and talk to people rather than expect ‘payback’ for your £50. Everyone in a Club is entitled to say ‘no’, no matter what they paid to come in!

Where have I said that I don't accept that everyone in a club is entitled to say no? I can accept that as reality, doesn't mean I have to be happy about it at the end of the night when I think back on how much better of a night I could have had if I spent the same money elsewhere?

Moot point really, considering that I've only attended clubs a couple of times as a +! to other couples, never like swinger club environments, and have no intentions again of going to one.

You will not be missed…

I'm already not missed by the vast majority of Fab anyway just like most single male profiles on here, what's a few more from this thread?

Seriously, it's funny how saying "you will not be missed" or anything along that line is seen as giving the person saying it some sort of mythical "moral/intellectual/social high ground".

Sorry, quite the opposite…

So why even say something that's an explicit putdown to me or anybody then? Doesn't that give you the perceived high ground over me because you think I'm someone who won't be missed because you have a low/bad opinion of me? What makes you think I even care about being missed on an online forum or in a niche lifestyle like swinging? I've walked away from this life at least thrice in my life, caring about whether anyone misses me or not isn't something that even comes across my mind.

Bottomline, please don't assume things about me. You're better than that. "

Thought you were leaving?

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

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By *mTheMrJMan  over a year ago

Barry


"

Feeling entitled to have your way will come over in conversation with people. Just go and talk to people rather than expect ‘payback’ for your £50. Everyone in a Club is entitled to say ‘no’, no matter what they paid to come in!

Where have I said that I don't accept that everyone in a club is entitled to say no? I can accept that as reality, doesn't mean I have to be happy about it at the end of the night when I think back on how much better of a night I could have had if I spent the same money elsewhere?

Moot point really, considering that I've only attended clubs a couple of times as a +! to other couples, never like swinger club environments, and have no intentions again of going to one.

You will not be missed…

I'm already not missed by the vast majority of Fab anyway just like most single male profiles on here, what's a few more from this thread?

Seriously, it's funny how saying "you will not be missed" or anything along that line is seen as giving the person saying it some sort of mythical "moral/intellectual/social high ground".

Sorry, quite the opposite…

So why even say something that's an explicit putdown to me or anybody then? Doesn't that give you the perceived high ground over me because you think I'm someone who won't be missed because you have a low/bad opinion of me? What makes you think I even care about being missed on an online forum or in a niche lifestyle like swinging? I've walked away from this life at least thrice in my life, caring about whether anyone misses me or not isn't something that even comes across my mind.

Bottomline, please don't assume things about me. You're better than that.

Thought you were leaving? "

He was making sure he wasn't missed

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

Feeling entitled to have your way will come over in conversation with people. Just go and talk to people rather than expect ‘payback’ for your £50. Everyone in a Club is entitled to say ‘no’, no matter what they paid to come in!

Where have I said that I don't accept that everyone in a club is entitled to say no? I can accept that as reality, doesn't mean I have to be happy about it at the end of the night when I think back on how much better of a night I could have had if I spent the same money elsewhere?

Moot point really, considering that I've only attended clubs a couple of times as a +! to other couples, never like swinger club environments, and have no intentions again of going to one.

You will not be missed…

I'm already not missed by the vast majority of Fab anyway just like most single male profiles on here, what's a few more from this thread?

Seriously, it's funny how saying "you will not be missed" or anything along that line is seen as giving the person saying it some sort of mythical "moral/intellectual/social high ground".

Sorry, quite the opposite…

So why even say something that's an explicit putdown to me or anybody then? Doesn't that give you the perceived high ground over me because you think I'm someone who won't be missed because you have a low/bad opinion of me? What makes you think I even care about being missed on an online forum or in a niche lifestyle like swinging? I've walked away from this life at least thrice in my life, caring about whether anyone misses me or not isn't something that even comes across my mind.

Bottomline, please don't assume things about me. You're better than that.

Thought you were leaving?

He was making sure he wasn't missed "

I think he's gone now thankfully. If we cared enough we'd start talking about him like he said we would, but we don't, so we won't.

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By *ethnmelvCouple  over a year ago

Cardiff


"

Feeling entitled to have your way will come over in conversation with people. Just go and talk to people rather than expect ‘payback’ for your £50. Everyone in a Club is entitled to say ‘no’, no matter what they paid to come in!

Where have I said that I don't accept that everyone in a club is entitled to say no? I can accept that as reality, doesn't mean I have to be happy about it at the end of the night when I think back on how much better of a night I could have had if I spent the same money elsewhere?

Moot point really, considering that I've only attended clubs a couple of times as a +! to other couples, never like swinger club environments, and have no intentions again of going to one.

You will not be missed…

I'm already not missed by the vast majority of Fab anyway just like most single male profiles on here, what's a few more from this thread?

Seriously, it's funny how saying "you will not be missed" or anything along that line is seen as giving the person saying it some sort of mythical "moral/intellectual/social high ground".

Sorry, quite the opposite…

So why even say something that's an explicit putdown to me or anybody then? Doesn't that give you the perceived high ground over me because you think I'm someone who won't be missed because you have a low/bad opinion of me? What makes you think I even care about being missed on an online forum or in a niche lifestyle like swinging? I've walked away from this life at least thrice in my life, caring about whether anyone misses me or not isn't something that even comes across my mind.

Bottomline, please don't assume things about me. You're better than that. "

& you blocked us…, this is our only avenue to respond. Instead of being frustrated, why not take a step back and consider how you come over? I can’t imagine you want to be perceived as a twat? Feeling entitled is not the answer for anyone going to a Swingers Club. Engage, get involved and have some empathy with others. No-one makes you feel the way you feel other than yourself. Good luck and be kind to yourself and others

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By *mTheMrJMan  over a year ago

Barry


"

Feeling entitled to have your way will come over in conversation with people. Just go and talk to people rather than expect ‘payback’ for your £50. Everyone in a Club is entitled to say ‘no’, no matter what they paid to come in!

Where have I said that I don't accept that everyone in a club is entitled to say no? I can accept that as reality, doesn't mean I have to be happy about it at the end of the night when I think back on how much better of a night I could have had if I spent the same money elsewhere?

Moot point really, considering that I've only attended clubs a couple of times as a +! to other couples, never like swinger club environments, and have no intentions again of going to one.

You will not be missed…

I'm already not missed by the vast majority of Fab anyway just like most single male profiles on here, what's a few more from this thread?

Seriously, it's funny how saying "you will not be missed" or anything along that line is seen as giving the person saying it some sort of mythical "moral/intellectual/social high ground".

Sorry, quite the opposite…

So why even say something that's an explicit putdown to me or anybody then? Doesn't that give you the perceived high ground over me because you think I'm someone who won't be missed because you have a low/bad opinion of me? What makes you think I even care about being missed on an online forum or in a niche lifestyle like swinging? I've walked away from this life at least thrice in my life, caring about whether anyone misses me or not isn't something that even comes across my mind.

Bottomline, please don't assume things about me. You're better than that.

Thought you were leaving?

He was making sure he wasn't missed

I think he's gone now thankfully. If we cared enough we'd start talking about him like he said we would, but we don't, so we won't. "

Agreed

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By *ldFashionedGentMan  over a year ago

Chelmsford

Well this certainly made for an enlightening read

Just to add some clarity

Having worked in a nightclub many years ago the idea that women pay less is not new. And it makes complete sense from a business perspective

The numbers of women and couples on fab compared to men show that if the price was the same for all the club would likely be filled completely by men. Which wouldn’t make for a fantastic experience in the context of swinging.

Anyhoo sweet dreams all

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By *itonthesideWoman  over a year ago

Glasgow


"The constant dynamic in humanity's history is that of the male doing the pursuit, and the female being pursued. Females never need to compete with other females for the attention and love/lust of men the same way men have to compete with other men for the attention and love/lust of women.

The most vicious competition I ever see is between women competing for the same man. The idea that that doesn't happen is just ludicrous.

Personally I find the whole competing thing absurd. The way I care for or play with one partner doesn't take anything away from the way I care for or play with another. And the way they do such with other people themselves doesn't negatively affect the relationship between us. The whole thing would be a whole lot better if more people would stop trying to beat other people."

Agreed. I’ve had women use my verification list as a shopping list before and work their way from top to bottom as some strange statement of competition. The idea that women don’t compete for men is madness.

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By *entle_lover_xMan  over a year ago

Great Dunmow

Just reading this thread and thought he who has now gone sounded like a young academic debating gender theory or something similar. Clicked on profile and low and behold a Master student Guess there are some out there who might find this approach sexy

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By *ansoffateMan  over a year ago

Sagittarius A

Kind of went on a tangent didn't it?

Does anyone know what the legal justification is though? 2010 Equality act Discrimination etc?

I don't really care but I do wonder I don't think market forces is a valid legal justification to discriminate is it?

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By *itonthesideWoman  over a year ago

Glasgow

I think of it like your broadband contract. When you are assumed to be a continuous customer you get the bum deal. People in contract pay full price , even when they come out of contract. Guys are the continuous customer. Perhaps not specific individual men, but as a collective there is always more demand than the spaces available.

When the broadband company want to entice you in they offer you special discounts. Women are the group being enticed in here. Even if they are not new, there are plenty spaces available and bringing in more women also allows the numbers of men to be increased

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By *entle_lover_xMan  over a year ago

Great Dunmow


"I think of it like your broadband contract. When you are assumed to be a continuous customer you get the bum deal. People in contract pay full price , even when they come out of contract. Guys are the continuous customer. Perhaps not specific individual men, but as a collective there is always more demand than the spaces available.

When the broadband company want to entice you in they offer you special discounts. Women are the group being enticed in here. Even if they are not new, there are plenty spaces available and bringing in more women also allows the numbers of men to be increased "

Yes but that is not what happens. Discounts to all new club members would be the comparable example. As Hans suggests in law can't think there is justification of direct sex discrimination. On Citizens Advice they give the example of the following being against the law "a nightclub charging a higher price for entry to a man because of his sex". I'm not a lawyer but sounds like swinging clubs are falling foul of the law on this.

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By *entle_lover_xMan  over a year ago

Great Dunmow


"Kind of went on a tangent didn't it?

Does anyone know what the legal justification is though? 2010 Equality act Discrimination etc?

I don't really care but I do wonder I don't think market forces is a valid legal justification to discriminate is it?"

No it is not and if anybody ever wanted to bring a case they might well win. Could be a case of careful what you wish for mind you because if prices for men had to drop or prices for ladies increase a lot of clubs may struggle to survive in current form.

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By *ou only live onceMan  over a year ago

London

Phew! I made it to the end.

Lots of long posts when "it's supply and demand, stupid" would have done. Not equal, for sure; and maybe not "fair", but lots of things aren't.

(I don't go to clubs so don't really have a dog in this fight)

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By *ansoffateMan  over a year ago

Sagittarius A


"I think of it like your broadband contract. When you are assumed to be a continuous customer you get the bum deal. People in contract pay full price , even when they come out of contract. Guys are the continuous customer. Perhaps not specific individual men, but as a collective there is always more demand than the spaces available.

When the broadband company want to entice you in they offer you special discounts. Women are the group being enticed in here. Even if they are not new, there are plenty spaces available and bringing in more women also allows the numbers of men to be increased "

That's a really interesting perspective and probably accurate.

But broadband companies aren't discriminating on the bases of a protected characteristic. When they give those offers. So I don't think it's comparable in legal sense. Definitely a fair economic comparison.

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By *itonthesideWoman  over a year ago

Glasgow


"I think of it like your broadband contract. When you are assumed to be a continuous customer you get the bum deal. People in contract pay full price , even when they come out of contract. Guys are the continuous customer. Perhaps not specific individual men, but as a collective there is always more demand than the spaces available.

When the broadband company want to entice you in they offer you special discounts. Women are the group being enticed in here. Even if they are not new, there are plenty spaces available and bringing in more women also allows the numbers of men to be increased

Yes but that is not what happens. Discounts to all new club members would be the comparable example. As Hans suggests in law can't think there is justification of direct sex discrimination. On Citizens Advice they give the example of the following being against the law "a nightclub charging a higher price for entry to a man because of his sex". I'm not a lawyer but sounds like swinging clubs are falling foul of the law on this.

"

Its exactly what is happening if you can zoom out and consider the categories through a different lense - a price for a consistent customer base and a price for a harder to draw customer base that helps with growth

People are just really offended because the split is male and female.

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By *ou only live onceMan  over a year ago

London


"I think of it like your broadband contract. When you are assumed to be a continuous customer you get the bum deal. People in contract pay full price , even when they come out of contract. Guys are the continuous customer. Perhaps not specific individual men, but as a collective there is always more demand than the spaces available.

When the broadband company want to entice you in they offer you special discounts. Women are the group being enticed in here. Even if they are not new, there are plenty spaces available and bringing in more women also allows the numbers of men to be increased

That's a really interesting perspective and probably accurate.

But broadband companies aren't discriminating on the bases of a protected characteristic. When they give those offers. So I don't think it's comparable in legal sense. Definitely a fair economic comparison."

No, but car insurance companies do, so it must be possible (tho' I know insurance companies will have data on accident numbers etc). I assume they argue market forces set prices, not the law, so long as they provide the same service to all, but it's a really good question!

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By *itonthesideWoman  over a year ago

Glasgow


"I think of it like your broadband contract. When you are assumed to be a continuous customer you get the bum deal. People in contract pay full price , even when they come out of contract. Guys are the continuous customer. Perhaps not specific individual men, but as a collective there is always more demand than the spaces available.

When the broadband company want to entice you in they offer you special discounts. Women are the group being enticed in here. Even if they are not new, there are plenty spaces available and bringing in more women also allows the numbers of men to be increased

That's a really interesting perspective and probably accurate.

But broadband companies aren't discriminating on the bases of a protected characteristic. When they give those offers. So I don't think it's comparable in legal sense. Definitely a fair economic comparison.

No, but car insurance companies do, so it must be possible (tho' I know insurance companies will have data on accident numbers etc). I assume they argue market forces set prices, not the law, so long as they provide the same service to all, but it's a really good question!"

We also have vat on womens razors but not mens if I remember correctly. A category put in place by a government body. So chances are the equality act doesn’t even apply to pricing and only to provision of services

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I think of it like your broadband contract. When you are assumed to be a continuous customer you get the bum deal. People in contract pay full price , even when they come out of contract. Guys are the continuous customer. Perhaps not specific individual men, but as a collective there is always more demand than the spaces available.

When the broadband company want to entice you in they offer you special discounts. Women are the group being enticed in here. Even if they are not new, there are plenty spaces available and bringing in more women also allows the numbers of men to be increased

That's a really interesting perspective and probably accurate.

But broadband companies aren't discriminating on the bases of a protected characteristic. When they give those offers. So I don't think it's comparable in legal sense. Definitely a fair economic comparison.

No, but car insurance companies do, so it must be possible (tho' I know insurance companies will have data on accident numbers etc). I assume they argue market forces set prices, not the law, so long as they provide the same service to all, but it's a really good question!

We also have vat on womens razors but not mens if I remember correctly. A category put in place by a government body. So chances are the equality act doesn’t even apply to pricing and only to provision of services "

I prefer to use men's razors

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By *r TriomanMan  over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

It's probably already been said (it's late and I haven't read through all the other posts) but it's supply and demand. Itsa tried and tested pricing strategy that, on yhe whole works reasonable well.

If prices for singles males dropped, I'd go to clubs more often but would still keep with in my annual club budget so clubs would make any more money out of me; I'd be over the moon though

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By *ansoffateMan  over a year ago

Sagittarius A


"I think of it like your broadband contract. When you are assumed to be a continuous customer you get the bum deal. People in contract pay full price , even when they come out of contract. Guys are the continuous customer. Perhaps not specific individual men, but as a collective there is always more demand than the spaces available.

When the broadband company want to entice you in they offer you special discounts. Women are the group being enticed in here. Even if they are not new, there are plenty spaces available and bringing in more women also allows the numbers of men to be increased

That's a really interesting perspective and probably accurate.

But broadband companies aren't discriminating on the bases of a protected characteristic. When they give those offers. So I don't think it's comparable in legal sense. Definitely a fair economic comparison.

No, but car insurance companies do, so it must be possible (tho' I know insurance companies will have data on accident numbers etc). I assume they argue market forces set prices, not the law, so long as they provide the same service to all, but it's a really good question!"

Yeah they can justify it by risk assessment same as age.

Statistically you are in a higher risk category so it costs more for insurance. That's valid, not uncontentious but clearly accepted as legal grounds and they are regulated.

I just looked it up online citizens advice cites charging women and men different prices for entry to clubs as an example of discrimination.

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By *entle_lover_xMan  over a year ago

Great Dunmow


"I think of it like your broadband contract. When you are assumed to be a continuous customer you get the bum deal. People in contract pay full price , even when they come out of contract. Guys are the continuous customer. Perhaps not specific individual men, but as a collective there is always more demand than the spaces available.

When the broadband company want to entice you in they offer you special discounts. Women are the group being enticed in here. Even if they are not new, there are plenty spaces available and bringing in more women also allows the numbers of men to be increased

Yes but that is not what happens. Discounts to all new club members would be the comparable example. As Hans suggests in law can't think there is justification of direct sex discrimination. On Citizens Advice they give the example of the following being against the law "a nightclub charging a higher price for entry to a man because of his sex". I'm not a lawyer but sounds like swinging clubs are falling foul of the law on this.

Its exactly what is happening if you can zoom out and consider the categories through a different lense - a price for a consistent customer base and a price for a harder to draw customer base that helps with growth

People are just really offended because the split is male and female. "

Not sure offended is the right word. Puzzled as to the legality perhaps. Zooming out is perhaps broadly true but not sure as I know a lot of regular club goers (like every week) who are ladies. At many places the core regular attendees are ladies. It is the men who are the ones as need new men willing to shell out £50 plus for perhaps just a social interaction. That aside the legal issue is not about big picture market forces. At any given event men are discriminated against on pricing plain and simple. I can see why but hard to see legal justification as the law stands from my simpletons understanding

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By *entle_lover_xMan  over a year ago

Great Dunmow


"I think of it like your broadband contract. When you are assumed to be a continuous customer you get the bum deal. People in contract pay full price , even when they come out of contract. Guys are the continuous customer. Perhaps not specific individual men, but as a collective there is always more demand than the spaces available.

When the broadband company want to entice you in they offer you special discounts. Women are the group being enticed in here. Even if they are not new, there are plenty spaces available and bringing in more women also allows the numbers of men to be increased

That's a really interesting perspective and probably accurate.

But broadband companies aren't discriminating on the bases of a protected characteristic. When they give those offers. So I don't think it's comparable in legal sense. Definitely a fair economic comparison.

No, but car insurance companies do, so it must be possible (tho' I know insurance companies will have data on accident numbers etc). I assume they argue market forces set prices, not the law, so long as they provide the same service to all, but it's a really good question!

We also have vat on womens razors but not mens if I remember correctly. A category put in place by a government body. So chances are the equality act doesn’t even apply to pricing and only to provision of services "

This was debated in parliament as personal care products for ladies are 20% higher on average. The equalities minister said law didn’t need to be tightened as in these cases ladies could by cheaper men’s products in most cases if they so wished. If at the checkout Tescos tried to charge ladies 5 times as much for the same product as men suspect it might be a problem

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By *itonthesideWoman  over a year ago

Glasgow


"I think of it like your broadband contract. When you are assumed to be a continuous customer you get the bum deal. People in contract pay full price , even when they come out of contract. Guys are the continuous customer. Perhaps not specific individual men, but as a collective there is always more demand than the spaces available.

When the broadband company want to entice you in they offer you special discounts. Women are the group being enticed in here. Even if they are not new, there are plenty spaces available and bringing in more women also allows the numbers of men to be increased

That's a really interesting perspective and probably accurate.

But broadband companies aren't discriminating on the bases of a protected characteristic. When they give those offers. So I don't think it's comparable in legal sense. Definitely a fair economic comparison.

No, but car insurance companies do, so it must be possible (tho' I know insurance companies will have data on accident numbers etc). I assume they argue market forces set prices, not the law, so long as they provide the same service to all, but it's a really good question!

Yeah they can justify it by risk assessment same as age.

Statistically you are in a higher risk category so it costs more for insurance. That's valid, not uncontentious but clearly accepted as legal grounds and they are regulated.

I just looked it up online citizens advice cites charging women and men different prices for entry to clubs as an example of discrimination."

So citizens advice are obviously talking about clubs in the more generic sense. A night club. A golf club maybe.

What does it say about age discrimination? Age is a protected characteristic is it not? Yet we have pensioner prices and junior prices?

I genuinely don’t think the equality act applies to pricing. It talks specifically about provision of services

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By *ansoffateMan  over a year ago

Sagittarius A


"I think of it like your broadband contract. When you are assumed to be a continuous customer you get the bum deal. People in contract pay full price , even when they come out of contract. Guys are the continuous customer. Perhaps not specific individual men, but as a collective there is always more demand than the spaces available.

When the broadband company want to entice you in they offer you special discounts. Women are the group being enticed in here. Even if they are not new, there are plenty spaces available and bringing in more women also allows the numbers of men to be increased

That's a really interesting perspective and probably accurate.

But broadband companies aren't discriminating on the bases of a protected characteristic. When they give those offers. So I don't think it's comparable in legal sense. Definitely a fair economic comparison.

No, but car insurance companies do, so it must be possible (tho' I know insurance companies will have data on accident numbers etc). I assume they argue market forces set prices, not the law, so long as they provide the same service to all, but it's a really good question!

Yeah they can justify it by risk assessment same as age.

Statistically you are in a higher risk category so it costs more for insurance. That's valid, not uncontentious but clearly accepted as legal grounds and they are regulated.

I just looked it up online citizens advice cites charging women and men different prices for entry to clubs as an example of discrimination.

So citizens advice are obviously talking about clubs in the more generic sense. A night club. A golf club maybe.

What does it say about age discrimination? Age is a protected characteristic is it not? Yet we have pensioner prices and junior prices?

I genuinely don’t think the equality act applies to pricing. It talks specifically about provision of services "

I think it probably does apply to pricing if it's cited there as an example. It's treating someone differently because of a protected characteristic.

I am not sure how pensioner and junior prices are justified tbh. It would be interesting to look that up, but I do think that's straying from the point a little.

The onus would be on those clubs to justify that the discrimination is legal. That justification, if it exists, will be different to insurance companies or junior prices.

Perhaps it has just never been challenged?

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By *entle_lover_xMan  over a year ago

Great Dunmow


"I think of it like your broadband contract. When you are assumed to be a continuous customer you get the bum deal. People in contract pay full price , even when they come out of contract. Guys are the continuous customer. Perhaps not specific individual men, but as a collective there is always more demand than the spaces available.

When the broadband company want to entice you in they offer you special discounts. Women are the group being enticed in here. Even if they are not new, there are plenty spaces available and bringing in more women also allows the numbers of men to be increased

That's a really interesting perspective and probably accurate.

But broadband companies aren't discriminating on the bases of a protected characteristic. When they give those offers. So I don't think it's comparable in legal sense. Definitely a fair economic comparison.

No, but car insurance companies do, so it must be possible (tho' I know insurance companies will have data on accident numbers etc). I assume they argue market forces set prices, not the law, so long as they provide the same service to all, but it's a really good question!

Yeah they can justify it by risk assessment same as age.

Statistically you are in a higher risk category so it costs more for insurance. That's valid, not uncontentious but clearly accepted as legal grounds and they are regulated.

I just looked it up online citizens advice cites charging women and men different prices for entry to clubs as an example of discrimination.

So citizens advice are obviously talking about clubs in the more generic sense. A night club. A golf club maybe.

What does it say about age discrimination? Age is a protected characteristic is it not? Yet we have pensioner prices and junior prices?

I genuinely don’t think the equality act applies to pricing. It talks specifically about provision of services "

Concessions on price based on age are allowed exceptions in some circumstances. For sex there don’t seem to be such exceptions unless justified by proven risk such as with some financial services. I’m general Equalities Act does apply to pricing. Here is a quote from Hansard which seems pretty clear cut

The Equality Act 2010 provides that a retailer must not discriminate against the customer either by failing to provide goods or services, or by providing them on different terms, on the basis of someone's sex.

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By *lephantisMan  over a year ago

Oxford


"Females never need to compete with other females for the attention and love/lust of men the same way men have to compete with other men for the attention and love/lust of women.

"

I loathe this essentialist, simplistic, cod-evo-psych, self-pitying and, worst of all, self-fulfilling nonsense.

Woman after woman lined up on this very forum a few days ago to point out the lie of the 'Women just have to wait while hot men throw themselves at them' trope. And man after man, not just me, will line up to say that women reach out to us, for friendship, conversation, desire, and a lovely mixture of all three, all the time. And that they fear rejection, as we all do.

Almost as if women are human beings, with hang-ups, anxieties, and needs, as men do. Imagine that.

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By *entle_lover_xMan  over a year ago

Great Dunmow

Also imagine scenario where ladies were charged a lot more. Say a golf admits ladies members but charges them five times as much because in reality it wants more men. Do you think this would be allowed? Or tickets to FA Cup Final being five times higher for ladies than men? Not a chance.

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By *ittlebirdWoman  over a year ago

The Big Smoke

My feelings on the matter OP are when then glass ceiling is finally broken for women in the world then the prices will come down. I for one will always try to break it… sometimes even succeeding; but til then. Suck it up buttercup

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By *andyfloss2000Woman  over a year ago

ashford

Agree shd b equal! Ones this area its free for women x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I understand it from an event managers point of view but I don't agree with it. Everyone should have equal pay, especially on party nights. Maybe clubs should just take it back to members only if they want to avoid people just walking in off the street who aren't in the lifestyle.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"How many times does this topic come up!? "

He's new to the forums. If you don't like the topic why post on it?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"What are your thoughts on the different pricing structures for single males, single females, couples, TV and TS?

Surely, if all genders are treated equally, this should also apply to entry prices. "

They charge men more because the clubs need money to survive. The women are sex bait to entice the men in, hence why women don't pay the same.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We have noticed a few events now running with male by invitation only and restricted numbers. Those events are running at equal entry pricing for both males and couples. We would rather pay 50 quid entry for a controlled numbers night than 30 quid for a sausage fest.

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By *istyPeaksCouple  over a year ago

braintree

[Removed by poster at 13/04/23 11:38:18]

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By *istyPeaksCouple  over a year ago

braintree

So much to unravel on this thread

I agree that the pricing structure is unfair. There are better ways probably to address it.

But there is far more disparity in the world as a whole. Until men & women actually work together as equals to break glass ceilings, end pay disparity in the workplace for women, end unfair treatment for single fathers, stop violence and abuse against women, old boys networks, misandry & misogyny and the endless blaming one another - it’s unlikely to change.

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Females never need to compete with other females for the attention and love/lust of men the same way men have to compete with other men for the attention and love/lust of women.

I loathe this essentialist, simplistic, cod-evo-psych, self-pitying and, worst of all, self-fulfilling nonsense.

Woman after woman lined up on this very forum a few days ago to point out the lie of the 'Women just have to wait while hot men throw themselves at them' trope. And man after man, not just me, will line up to say that women reach out to us, for friendship, conversation, desire, and a lovely mixture of all three, all the time. And that they fear rejection, as we all do.

Almost as if women are human beings, with hang-ups, anxieties, and needs, as men do. Imagine that."

And then the people who say this stuff say that we women can't know our minds and experiences and men like you are lying to manipulate us.

I mean yeah, sure, whatever

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By *4bimMan  over a year ago

Farnborough Hampshire

if you want to make money get women and lots of them into your club.

doesnt matter if its a night club or casino if men can see beautiful women they will invade the place and pay over the odds.

its the nature of the beast. its called business.

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By *izzy.Woman  over a year ago

Stoke area

It doesn't seem fair people being charged different amounts, but we all know there are far less women involved in Swinging than men. Swingers Clubs give ladies a discounted rate to try to encourage them to attend. If everyone paid the same lower price, the numbers in the clubs would increase. Even more gents attending, it would become a sausage fest. This would make many women intimidated and uncomfortable and likely lead to even less women attending.

If you want to go to a club with 80 guys and 10 couples then give that a try. However the current pricing structure gives more chance of having a better mix of genders and that suits the majority of people.

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By *inkycouple20212021Couple  over a year ago

Yaxley

If everyone was charged the same it would be like a sausage fest in every club night. Couples and females are charged lower amounts to attract them

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It's not a broken game, and it's not about equality. If you want to go to a party that is an absolute sausage fest then go for it.

What is it about then?

Women being passive pickers apparently "

Yes because brexit made it hard for migrant workers to come over seasonally to do all the passive picking.

Wait… I may have that confused with something else

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By *hrista BellendWoman  over a year ago

Delightful Bliss


"It is both sad & funny dipping in to these conversations. Clearly more men are on these sites (single or married) and they see Clubs as an opportunity to have sex. Now I may also see this site & Clubs as an opportunity to have sex, but it is more about having fun. I go to Clubs to meet guys, couples or girls who want to have fun. It is a cheap night out compared to vanilla clubs, and so long as people smile and treat it as a fun game anything can happen. As soon as guys expect sex, the answer is fuck off!

Someone tell the marketing people of swinger clubs, that the purpose of swinger clubs is NOT to provide opportunities for people to have sex! Clearly the name "swinger club" isn't what it actually means!

If I want to go to a club purely just to have fun and socialise, I can do the exact same thing going to a vanilla mainstream nightclub for a fraction of the price I pay to go into a swinger club.

The reason single women and couples can feel that they can approach going to a swinger club with the same mentality of "having fun and socialising" as they would to a normal nightclub is because they're not paying through the nose just to attend. There's little sunk cost for them in terms of swinger club pricing. Charge me a tenner to attend a swinger club monthly or more, and I can also glibly say that I go to a swinger club "just to have fun and meet new people to socialise with".

p.s. again, before anyone jumps on me, I am NOT saying that I assume every time I go to a swinger club I MUST 100% get laid as a single male. But if I'm paying over fifty quid just to ENTER a swingers club that's EXPLICITLY a venue facilitating people to meet up and have group sex on the premises as a single male, I'm not going to appreciate being treated as "just another socialising male option" by females or couples there when they pay a tenner or twenty quid to enter the same place.

A swingers club is a place which provides facilities for people to have sex, nothing more.

A hotel also provides facilities for people to have sex, no? So what differentiates a hotel from a swingers club? "

Most are not exclusively for over 18's

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By *nkyCplCouple  over a year ago

Northampton

Female privilege…

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By *essicagraceWoman  over a year ago

birmingham

Same as how you reduce the cost of clothes that won't sell and raise the price of big sellers. Not surprising...

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By *hagTonightMan  over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

Whilst everyone should be charged the same, it is about the ratio. I dont think that many women go to clubs as men do.

What if the ratio got less, so it would be more even. I wonder if the pricing would be the same then?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

A swingers club is a place which provides facilities for people to have sex, nothing more.

A hotel also provides facilities for people to have sex, no? So what differentiates a hotel from a swingers club?

Most are not exclusively for over 18's"

Thanks for providing further proof that a swingers club is meant for adult activities like sex.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"It doesn't seem fair people being charged different amounts, but we all know there are far less women involved in Swinging than men. Swingers Clubs give ladies a discounted rate to try to encourage them to attend. If everyone paid the same lower price, the numbers in the clubs would increase. Even more gents attending, it would become a sausage fest. This would make many women intimidated and uncomfortable and likely lead to even less women attending.

If you want to go to a club with 80 guys and 10 couples then give that a try. However the current pricing structure gives more chance of having a better mix of genders and that suits the majority of people. "

As I previously said, if high prices for single men is supposed to deter them from coming and making swinger clubs a sausage fest, then clearly that's failed if one takes a good look at every swinger club that doesn't have couples-only events.

I get what some commenters here said about it merely being the nature of business to fleece the most out of your biggest and most regular client demographic. However I don't think it simply stops at money and business sense, and my opinion is that the extremely skewered price differentiation based on gender and relationship status is reflective of the imbalance and constant conflict of identity and belonging between single male swingers and couples/single women/trans individuals.

By the way, whoever made that snide remark above about me coming off as trying to apply gender studies arguments here, I'm not trying to be woke about things or overly intellectualise this. I get that my points will be hard to swallow or accept by many here who are perfectly comfortable with the way things are now because it benefits their demographic and purpose, that doesn't by default make me wrong or any of the nasty ad-hominem attacks on me in comments above valid.

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By *TG3Man  over a year ago

Dorchester

To be fair though the clubs round my way are very fairly priced so i go every now and again

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By *londebiguyMan  over a year ago

Southport


"It's not a broken game, and it's not about equality. If you want to go to a party that is an absolute sausage fest then go for it.

The current club dynamic (no matter if swinger or mainstream) is already a huge sausage fest now even with significant gender-differentiating pricing in place. So clearly if the intent is to even out the balance of single men with couples/single women/trans people, then it has singularly failed.

The real reason why clubs are sausage fests is because society has throughout the ages conditioned two social structures:

1) Males have to put themselves out in a public place to be seen and compete with other men for attention from women.

2) Women are just passive pickers of the most attractive man publicly trying to woo her for love or sex.

The constant dynamic in humanity's history is that of the male doing the pursuit, and the female being pursued. Females never need to compete with other females for the attention and love/lust of men the same way men have to compete with other men for the attention and love/lust of women.

That... is the root of the "sausage fest" phenomenon. And that, is also why no measures like gendered pricing will fundamentally change it.

Let's face it, many men, to get thier dick wet will go from woman to woman until one says yes, society hasn't constructed these structures, thirsty men have. "

That is nothing to do with either society or the men.

Statistically more males are born than females in mammals.

It's deep-rooted in every mammal to procreate and preserve the species.

In humans especially there us the search for pleasure as well.

It's obvious that women will not need to try so hard to mate as men.

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By *londebiguyMan  over a year ago

Southport


"if you want to make money get women and lots of them into your club.

doesnt matter if its a night club or casino if men can see beautiful women they will invade the place and pay over the odds.

its the nature of the beast. its called business."

It really does not need to be 'beautiful women'

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

That is nothing to do with either society or the men.

Statistically more males are born than females in mammals.

It's deep-rooted in every mammal to procreate and preserve the species.

In humans especially there us the search for pleasure as well.

It's obvious that women will not need to try so hard to mate as men."

Careful now, that's going to bring the Hate Brigade down here yelling that you're an Andrew Tate misogynistic wannabe etc etc etc...

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By *oiluvfunMan  over a year ago

Penrith


"

The numbers of women and couples on fab compared to men show that if the price was the same for all the club would likely be filled completely by men. Which wouldn’t make for a fantastic experience in the context of swinging. "

Not true; Fab is completely free to use, and is abused by people running multiple profiles because of this. If Fab was a pay site only, a more accurate membership would show.

The irony of the club scene is though, that it shows the swinging scene more accurately, as in; 5% single females, 35% couples, and 60% single guys....

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By *oiluvfunMan  over a year ago

Penrith


"My feelings on the matter OP are when then glass ceiling is finally broken for women in the world then the prices will come down. I for one will always try to break it… sometimes even succeeding; but til then. Suck it up buttercup "

Always wondered if Emmeline Pankhurst would have said "I'm paying the same as a solo guy" when entering a swinger's club...

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By *itonthesideWoman  over a year ago

Glasgow


"

That is nothing to do with either society or the men.

Statistically more males are born than females in mammals.

It's deep-rooted in every mammal to procreate and preserve the species.

In humans especially there us the search for pleasure as well.

It's obvious that women will not need to try so hard to mate as men.

Careful now, that's going to bring the Hate Brigade down here yelling that you're an Andrew Tate misogynistic wannabe etc etc etc... "

Its just irrelevant considering the context of the discussion.

In 2020 there was approx 102 men in the world to every 100 women.

So to follow the logic either all the women are sitting back waiting on that huge extra 2% to scoop them up, or we had loads of males born in the last 3 years and they are sitting back waiting on the toddlers growing up then scooping them up

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By *alcon43Woman  over a year ago

Paisley

The pricing obviously doesn’t put single men off. The club I go to is often full for single guys a week ahead of the event.

You do realise that this all sounds like a meat market with the women being paraded around like cattle waiting for the highest bid.

I mostly go to socialise and rarely play at the club so there are misconceptions as to the reasons why people go.

Women do feel as if they are competing against each other at times, it’s difficult not to when there are different ages and sizes. The men who socialise and take time to have a conversation will do a lot better than the Neanderthal behaviour many display.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"The pricing obviously doesn’t put single men off. The club I go to is often full for single guys a week ahead of the event.

You do realise that this all sounds like a meat market with the women being paraded around like cattle waiting for the highest bid.

I mostly go to socialise and rarely play at the club so there are misconceptions as to the reasons why people go.

Women do feel as if they are competing against each other at times, it’s difficult not to when there are different ages and sizes. The men who socialise and take time to have a conversation will do a lot better than the Neanderthal behaviour many display."

One woman feeling she's competing with the other 4 to 10 women (be it single or as part of a couple) in a swinger club beats one guy having to compete with the other 20 to 30 guys (be it single or as part of a couple) in there.

Also, not aimed as a jab towards your comment, but I find it interesting how many females on here say they go to swinger clubs to socialise and sex isn't a guaranteed thing on the menu, but then they also claim that women do compete with each other for male attention and aren't just "passive pickers". If socialisation and having a good night out is the true goal, then there should be little to no element of competition to be more popular than others like yourself in the same environment.

The fact that such feelings of competition exist shows that there IS a motive to going to a swingers club that goes beyond just "going there to socialise and have a good time with other like minded people". That motive is sex. Yet my previous comment about how men will naturally expect to want fairer pricing or a decent chance at getting laid in a swingers club if they're paying £50 to get in got shot down by some on here for god knows what reason.

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By *r SensualMan  over a year ago

London

From a personal standpoint, the disparity in pricing is not the issue, but more so the way some clubs treat single men like second class citizens. You only have to look at the single guy changing facilities for example in terms of size and comfort compared to those for the ladies and couples. Some are so tiny and cramped that you barely have room to move.

A lot of guys are also just left to their own devices and not even acknowledged once their money has been taken. I’ve been to many a club and seen guys sat in the corner, not given a tour or even introduced to a few people who the club know are regulars in order to make them feel somewhat included.

A real lack of hospitality if you ask me. My view is if you’re going to make someone pay a premium to enter your premises, the least you could do is provide some level of customer service in order to make them feel valued.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"From a personal standpoint, the disparity in pricing is not the issue, but more so the way some clubs treat single men like second class citizens. You only have to look at the single guy changing facilities for example in terms of size and comfort compared to those for the ladies and couples. Some are so tiny and cramped that you barely have room to move.

A lot of guys are also just left to their own devices and not even acknowledged once their money has been taken. I’ve been to many a club and seen guys sat in the corner, not given a tour or even introduced to a few people who the club know are regulars in order to make them feel somewhat included.

A real lack of hospitality if you ask me. My view is if you’re going to make someone pay a premium to enter your premises, the least you could do is provide some level of customer service in order to make them feel valued. "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"From a personal standpoint, the disparity in pricing is not the issue, but more so the way some clubs treat single men like second class citizens. You only have to look at the single guy changing facilities for example in terms of size and comfort compared to those for the ladies and couples. Some are so tiny and cramped that you barely have room to move.

A lot of guys are also just left to their own devices and not even acknowledged once their money has been taken. I’ve been to many a club and seen guys sat in the corner, not given a tour or even introduced to a few people who the club know are regulars in order to make them feel somewhat included.

A real lack of hospitality if you ask me. My view is if you’re going to make someone pay a premium to enter your premises, the least you could do is provide some level of customer service in order to make them feel valued. "

Have to say in any of the club's I've been...that's not my experience.

But I think the simple answer is ..is take your money to clubs that don't treat you like this.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

If you don't want to pay it, don't go to a club

Despite being a member here for 10+ years on & off, I have never, once, set foot inside a mixed swingers club

I am lucky in that respect, being bisexual

I can walk into a number of gay/bi saunas, no membership, no waiting list, no questions asked for sub £20

I just have sex with a guy instead of a woman

I am not looking for an emotional connection, any socialising or to make friends

It's purely transactional for me in that respect, but then again, I'm not a swinger, I'm just someone that use a swingers site

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By *r SensualMan  over a year ago

London


"From a personal standpoint, the disparity in pricing is not the issue, but more so the way some clubs treat single men like second class citizens. You only have to look at the single guy changing facilities for example in terms of size and comfort compared to those for the ladies and couples. Some are so tiny and cramped that you barely have room to move.

A lot of guys are also just left to their own devices and not even acknowledged once their money has been taken. I’ve been to many a club and seen guys sat in the corner, not given a tour or even introduced to a few people who the club know are regulars in order to make them feel somewhat included.

A real lack of hospitality if you ask me. My view is if you’re going to make someone pay a premium to enter your premises, the least you could do is provide some level of customer service in order to make them feel valued.

Have to say in any of the club's I've been...that's not my experience.

But I think the simple answer is ..is take your money to clubs that don't treat you like this. "

Oh absolutely I couldn’t agree more, this was more something I’ve noticed from the various clubs up and down the country that I’ve attended, because I’m a very extroverted person a lot what of I’ve mentioned were observations.

Or the alternative could be to put measures in place that puts everyone on a somewhat equal footing when they attend a club.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Shouldn’t women pay more if they’re going to end up with more choice?

Let’s be honest it’s less of a “necessary evil” and more a case of getting women in so that they can draw paying men in. It’s the same method used by clubs and bars too.

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By *d4fun73Man  over a year ago

Shipley

The cheap or free prices for women doesn't work, it being free for women to go to clubs makes no difference, they would go anyway. It's not as if some random woman is walking past a club and pops in for a shag just because it's free!

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By *d4fun73Man  over a year ago

Shipley


"

The numbers of women and couples on fab compared to men show that if the price was the same for all the club would likely be filled completely by men. Which wouldn’t make for a fantastic experience in the context of swinging.

Not true; Fab is completely free to use, and is abused by people running multiple profiles because of this. If Fab was a pay site only, a more accurate membership would show.

The irony of the club scene is though, that it shows the swinging scene more accurately, as in; 5% single females, 35% couples, and 60% single guys...."

I don't think those ratios are correct. Most club nights are made up of couples.

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By *apperleymanMan  over a year ago

Nottingham

Let’s be real (and others have mentioned it) men will pay the asking price and single women won’t..

Hence clubs charge it, they’re businesses that have to pay rent & bills..

It is interesting however to read some of the comments from women who feel they shouldn’t have to pay..

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By *icolerobbieCouple  over a year ago

walsall


"Shouldn’t women pay more if they’re going to end up with more choice?

Let’s be honest it’s less of a “necessary evil” and more a case of getting women in so that they can draw paying men in. It’s the same method used by clubs and bars too."

This is so very true. The women allowed on for free are being used as bait for the guys. It’s not a new marketing technique.

There is a saying:

“If you are getting a service for free, then it is you that is the product”

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Whether the equalities act applies or not in relation to Swinger Clubs has not, to my knowledge been tested in court. I can find no stated cases on the matter. Given the strength of feeling being shown, maybe a single guy should sue one of the clubs? A useful test case!

So. Who?

Exactly!

So the fact that no one has, and in all likelihood will means that despite noble claims to the contrary the hard done by single men are indeed paying into the 'broken' system.

Many clubs especially for popular events don't even admit trans customers. Is that discriminatory? Possibly. Am I going to throw a paddy? No, I don't feel entitled enough. I guess the clubs know what works best for their clientèle and their business.

There does need go be a means of balancing the clientèle attending. Thus a rationing system is needed. In a market economy, pricing has always filled this role ... supply and demand and all that. Demand amongst single men is likely to be much less price elastic, hence the price disparity will need to be quite marked to have the rationing effect desired.

In simple terms, supply and demand mate, if you don't like it, take them to court. Anything else is acceptance.

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By *rHotNottsMan  over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I go to a club maybe 3-4 times a year, and always with a female, price is mostly irrelevant, it’s location and type of club.

If there are hordes of single horny guys coming to my house every week I would charter the absolute maximum I could and if 25% were put off by the price I’d know I’d priced it right

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By *rHotNottsMan  over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham


"Shouldn’t women pay more if they’re going to end up with more choice?

Let’s be honest it’s less of a “necessary evil” and more a case of getting women in so that they can draw paying men in. It’s the same method used by clubs and bars too.

This is so very true. The women allowed on for free are being used as bait for the guys. It’s not a new marketing technique.

There is a saying:

“If you are getting a service for free, then it is you that is the product”"

Exactly sane on here , Facebook, insta etc we are the products it’s no secret. So in a club the single women are for sale , the single men are the buyers and the couples are the only customers of the club

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By *icolerobbieCouple  over a year ago

walsall


"My feelings on the matter OP are when then glass ceiling is finally broken for women in the world then the prices will come down. I for one will always try to break it… sometimes even succeeding; but til then. Suck it up buttercup "

That bloody patriarchy has put the price up for men….

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By *icolerobbieCouple  over a year ago

walsall


"Whether the equalities act applies or not in relation to Swinger Clubs has not, to my knowledge been tested in court. I can find no stated cases on the matter. Given the strength of feeling being shown, maybe a single guy should sue one of the clubs? A useful test case!

So. Who?

Exactly!

So the fact that no one has, and in all likelihood will means that despite noble claims to the contrary the hard done by single men are indeed paying into the 'broken' system.

Many clubs especially for popular events don't even admit trans customers. Is that discriminatory? Possibly. Am I going to throw a paddy? No, I don't feel entitled enough. I guess the clubs know what works best for their clientèle and their business.

There does need go be a means of balancing the clientèle attending. Thus a rationing system is needed. In a market economy, pricing has always filled this role ... supply and demand and all that. Demand amongst single men is likely to be much less price elastic, hence the price disparity will need to be quite marked to have the rationing effect desired.

In simple terms, supply and demand mate, if you don't like it, take them to court. Anything else is acceptance."

I’m sure it’s been clarified in the past that private members clubs are exempt.

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By *ittyandtheboyCouple  over a year ago

Back of the bins.

Sometimes it really is very lopsided!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Whether the equalities act applies or not in relation to Swinger Clubs has not, to my knowledge been tested in court. I can find no stated cases on the matter. Given the strength of feeling being shown, maybe a single guy should sue one of the clubs? A useful test case!

So. Who?

Exactly!

So the fact that no one has, and in all likelihood will means that despite noble claims to the contrary the hard done by single men are indeed paying into the 'broken' system.

Many clubs especially for popular events don't even admit trans customers. Is that discriminatory? Possibly. Am I going to throw a paddy? No, I don't feel entitled enough. I guess the clubs know what works best for their clientèle and their business.

There does need go be a means of balancing the clientèle attending. Thus a rationing system is needed. In a market economy, pricing has always filled this role ... supply and demand and all that. Demand amongst single men is likely to be much less price elastic, hence the price disparity will need to be quite marked to have the rationing effect desired.

In simple terms, supply and demand mate, if you don't like it, take them to court. Anything else is acceptance.

I’m sure it’s been clarified in the past that private members clubs are exempt."

There you go then.

Entirely legal. And logical

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

When will clubs recognise MM pairings as couples?

I've been with my OH for 10 years+, yet we have zero validity as a couple in the eyes of those clubs we approached who, without exception, would insist on two single male membership / entrance fees

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Whether the equalities act applies or not in relation to Swinger Clubs has not, to my knowledge been tested in court. I can find no stated cases on the matter. Given the strength of feeling being shown, maybe a single guy should sue one of the clubs? A useful test case!

So. Who?

Exactly!

So the fact that no one has, and in all likelihood will means that despite noble claims to the contrary the hard done by single men are indeed paying into the 'broken' system.

Many clubs especially for popular events don't even admit trans customers. Is that discriminatory? Possibly. Am I going to throw a paddy? No, I don't feel entitled enough. I guess the clubs know what works best for their clientèle and their business.

There does need go be a means of balancing the clientèle attending. Thus a rationing system is needed. In a market economy, pricing has always filled this role ... supply and demand and all that. Demand amongst single men is likely to be much less price elastic, hence the price disparity will need to be quite marked to have the rationing effect desired.

In simple terms, supply and demand mate, if you don't like it, take them to court. Anything else is acceptance.

I’m sure it’s been clarified in the past that private members clubs are exempt.

There you go then.

Entirely legal. And logical"

Actually ... from reading the legislation it looks like private members clubs are not exempt

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS  over a year ago

chichester

lol love to see some people go take a sex club to court, it would be hilarious in the news for a change ...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"lol love to see some people go take a sex club to court, it would be hilarious in the news for a change ... "

Exactly.

Time to put up

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By *icolerobbieCouple  over a year ago

walsall


"Whether the equalities act applies or not in relation to Swinger Clubs has not, to my knowledge been tested in court. I can find no stated cases on the matter. Given the strength of feeling being shown, maybe a single guy should sue one of the clubs? A useful test case!

So. Who?

Exactly!

So the fact that no one has, and in all likelihood will means that despite noble claims to the contrary the hard done by single men are indeed paying into the 'broken' system.

Many clubs especially for popular events don't even admit trans customers. Is that discriminatory? Possibly. Am I going to throw a paddy? No, I don't feel entitled enough. I guess the clubs know what works best for their clientèle and their business.

There does need go be a means of balancing the clientèle attending. Thus a rationing system is needed. In a market economy, pricing has always filled this role ... supply and demand and all that. Demand amongst single men is likely to be much less price elastic, hence the price disparity will need to be quite marked to have the rationing effect desired.

In simple terms, supply and demand mate, if you don't like it, take them to court. Anything else is acceptance.

I’m sure it’s been clarified in the past that private members clubs are exempt.

There you go then.

Entirely legal. And logical

Actually ... from reading the legislation it looks like private members clubs are not exempt "

Then maybe you should file a complaint to the relevant authority?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Whether the equalities act applies or not in relation to Swinger Clubs has not, to my knowledge been tested in court. I can find no stated cases on the matter. Given the strength of feeling being shown, maybe a single guy should sue one of the clubs? A useful test case!

So. Who?

Exactly!

So the fact that no one has, and in all likelihood will means that despite noble claims to the contrary the hard done by single men are indeed paying into the 'broken' system.

Many clubs especially for popular events don't even admit trans customers. Is that discriminatory? Possibly. Am I going to throw a paddy? No, I don't feel entitled enough. I guess the clubs know what works best for their clientèle and their business.

There does need go be a means of balancing the clientèle attending. Thus a rationing system is needed. In a market economy, pricing has always filled this role ... supply and demand and all that. Demand amongst single men is likely to be much less price elastic, hence the price disparity will need to be quite marked to have the rationing effect desired.

In simple terms, supply and demand mate, if you don't like it, take them to court. Anything else is acceptance.

I’m sure it’s been clarified in the past that private members clubs are exempt.

There you go then.

Entirely legal. And logical

Actually ... from reading the legislation it looks like private members clubs are not exempt

Then maybe you should file a complaint to the relevant authority?"

I have no beef with the clubs but I have suggested that any of the guys above who are so upset by the system should do just that.

In my mind the price differential is logical and commercially sound.

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By *otSoPoshWoman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

My thought is that the price is the price.

If you want to go, whether it be a swingers club, a sex dungeon, a theme park or a concert... you pay the money.

I don't think it is fair that kids are charged less than I am for Disney World. If I want to go I pay without arguing.

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By * and R cple4Couple  over a year ago

swansea


"Whether the equalities act applies or not in relation to Swinger Clubs has not, to my knowledge been tested in court. I can find no stated cases on the matter. Given the strength of feeling being shown, maybe a single guy should sue one of the clubs? A useful test case!

So. Who?

Exactly!

So the fact that no one has, and in all likelihood will means that despite noble claims to the contrary the hard done by single men are indeed paying into the 'broken' system.

Many clubs especially for popular events don't even admit trans customers. Is that discriminatory? Possibly. Am I going to throw a paddy? No, I don't feel entitled enough. I guess the clubs know what works best for their clientèle and their business.

There does need go be a means of balancing the clientèle attending. Thus a rationing system is needed. In a market economy, pricing has always filled this role ... supply and demand and all that. Demand amongst single men is likely to be much less price elastic, hence the price disparity will need to be quite marked to have the rationing effect desired.

In simple terms, supply and demand mate, if you don't like it, take them to court. Anything else is acceptance.

I’m sure it’s been clarified in the past that private members clubs are exempt.

There you go then.

Entirely legal. And logical

Actually ... from reading the legislation it looks like private members clubs are not exempt "

Their must be some kind of loop hole otherwise they would have been challenged on it by now.

Men that attend clubs regularly understand the reasoning behind the price difference.If the prices were lower for men it would be a total sausage fest which would put a lot of couples /single women off .

We’ve never had any issues with single men at clubs but we can understand the reason why their charged more.

We also attend events where everyone no matter if your a man women trans cd or a couple are charged exactly the same and they are always very popular but the single men are limited to make sure theirs a good mixture of people.

It’s extremely rare we play at clubs we mostly go to catch up with friends maybe have a watch socialising is a important part of this lifestyle and I think that’s where some people go wrong they just don’t understand that part.It also works out cheaper for us to go to a club as we pay our entrance fee and bring our own alcohol..

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By *J_SpiceyCouple  over a year ago

Kinky Kings Lynn

In an ideal world gendered pricing would be fair for sure.

At my kink and fetish parties gender and pricing is not discriminatory. The entry cost is equal regardless of gender. And it is normally equal on sexes attending.

Unfortunately the swinging scene, just doesn’t work the same. It’s a female driven scene. A club scene in my opinion offers plenty of advantages. The scene is flooded with men, and unfortunately for them the ratio to women is not balanced, a pricing structure in favour of women rightly or wrongly therefore provides a better balance for those wishing to use this club system.

Many people are pro clubs, many are anti clubs, both opinions and views of those groups vary for many differing reasons.

Pricing may be one of those for the anti club group.

It is your choice to want to attend or not.

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By *J_SpiceyCouple  over a year ago

Kinky Kings Lynn


"When will clubs recognise MM pairings as couples?

I've been with my OH for 10 years+, yet we have zero validity as a couple in the eyes of those clubs we approached who, without exception, would insist on two single male membership / entrance fees"

Bi Male or gay male couples are able to attend parties specifically suited, as are female couples.

However, we would advise the females attend as singles if price favours them to do so. Their choice to pay single/couples prices.

Straight male/female couples are not recognised. I did have a ‘male couple’ in the clubs early days try it on at a GreedyGirls party. I let them in at a Couples price and introduced them to every female in attendance as a male couple in a relationship.

At my club, I try hard to provide value for money and be as fair as possible.

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By *J_SpiceyCouple  over a year ago

Kinky Kings Lynn

Also trans females who attend, are treated as presenting.

Many clubs have T Girls pricing, we treat T Girls as females including pricing. We find treating people in the correct manner, earns our respect within the community and benefits the club with their support, where others tend to turn their back on such alternative groups.

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By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"Whether the equalities act applies or not in relation to Swinger Clubs has not, to my knowledge been tested in court. I can find no stated cases on the matter. Given the strength of feeling being shown, maybe a single guy should sue one of the clubs? A useful test case!

So. Who?

Exactly!

So the fact that no one has, and in all likelihood will means that despite noble claims to the contrary the hard done by single men are indeed paying into the 'broken' system.

Many clubs especially for popular events don't even admit trans customers. Is that discriminatory? Possibly. Am I going to throw a paddy? No, I don't feel entitled enough. I guess the clubs know what works best for their clientèle and their business.

There does need go be a means of balancing the clientèle attending. Thus a rationing system is needed. In a market economy, pricing has always filled this role ... supply and demand and all that. Demand amongst single men is likely to be much less price elastic, hence the price disparity will need to be quite marked to have the rationing effect desired.

In simple terms, supply and demand mate, if you don't like it, take them to court. Anything else is acceptance.

I’m sure it’s been clarified in the past that private members clubs are exempt.

There you go then.

Entirely legal. And logical

Actually ... from reading the legislation it looks like private members clubs are not exempt Their must be some kind of loop hole otherwise they would have been challenged on it by now.

Men that attend clubs regularly understand the reasoning behind the price difference.If the prices were lower for men it would be a total sausage fest which would put a lot of couples /single women off .

We’ve never had any issues with single men at clubs but we can understand the reason why their charged more.

We also attend events where everyone no matter if your a man women trans cd or a couple are charged exactly the same and they are always very popular but the single men are limited to make sure theirs a good mixture of people.

It’s extremely rare we play at clubs we mostly go to catch up with friends maybe have a watch socialising is a important part of this lifestyle and I think that’s where some people go wrong they just don’t understand that part.It also works out cheaper for us to go to a club as we pay our entrance fee and bring our own alcohol.."

The loophole is this.

Pricing differentials are permitted when used as a mechanism to encourage minority groups to attend that otherwise would not - in this case single women.

Take couples out of the equation for a second because assuming it's a MF couple regardless of jow many attend they won't affect gender ratios.

If single men and women were charged equal amounts (low prices) a higher number of men would attend and ergo women would be less likely to. A ge realisation of course because some women would revel in a club with a large number of men, but the majority prefer less of a disparity. If both were charged the same and it was a higher amount the same result would happen. There would be more men thatn women.

Now many will say why not just limit the number of men allowed in. But that opens more issues. Who chooses who gets in? What happens if the quota is set and some don't show? First come fist served wouldn't work as there's no 'quality control'.

The question of how best to manage numbers has been asked thousands of times on and off Fab and surprisingly the system has never changed, which should tell people that it's the best and most effective way for clubs to manage the situation.

The same arguments always come up, the same questions of fairness and the same claims of discrimination.

Often from people who have no intention of attending clubs in the first place but see it as a good opportunity to argue about sexism and how single males are so hard done by in the swinging world.

As a couple who just meets guys, generally in clubs it's odd that we rarely encounter anyone in those clubs that is unhappy with club policies and prices.

I've see more guys blow considerably more money on a weekend watching football, playing golf or just drinking in pubs. The ones that go to good swingers clubs think they're getting good value for their money and a great night out.

A

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Note to self: only people who go to swinger clubs get to talk about swinger clubs.

Playing roundabout passive aggressive shooting games isn't just the preserve of one person in here!

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By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"When will clubs recognise MM pairings as couples?

I've been with my OH for 10 years+, yet we have zero validity as a couple in the eyes of those clubs we approached who, without exception, would insist on two single male membership / entrance fees"

That's an interesting point Bussy.

I've known a bi female couple who used to go to clubs as single women because it worked out economically cheaper. I know our regular haunt has a few 'throuples' that attend regularly and I honestly don't know where they sit in the pricing issue.

Obviously those who are economically disadvantaged will feel more hard done by than those who get in for less from a financial perspective, but pricing isn't actually the most common bugbear I've encountered over the years. That relates more to membership criteria, guest list protocols and 'streaming of attendees.

To old, too fat, too young, wrong nationality, wrong sexuality or whatever the criteria - when it's down to 'management' to decide whose face fits then that issue can cause far more problems than having to pay a few quid more than someone else. It's even yhe case at purely social events that some people are left off guest lists just because of their gender, their sexuality, their age or worst of all, who they are and who they know.

That at least is something that most clubs don't care about. As long as your behaviour and attitude is right then you won't be denied access due to a personal characteristic.

I'd rather have to pay more to get in somewhere than have to jump through someone's personal hoops to gain entry any day of the week.

A

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By *otSoPoshWoman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Note to self: only people who go to swinger clubs get to talk about swinger clubs.

"

I don't think that's actually true... but surely it makes sense that people who have experience of a thing would be able to speak more knowledgeably about the thing?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Note to self: only people who go to swinger clubs get to talk about swinger clubs.

I don't think that's actually true... but surely it makes sense that people who have experience of a thing would be able to speak more knowledgeably about the thing?"

Yeah it does. But the passive aggressive comment I was taking potshots at made no such distinction. I don't go to swinger clubs anymore, doesn't mean I've not gone before in the past to several, and thus I do at least have some experience to base my opinions off on.

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple  over a year ago

Manchester-ish

Is this thread nearly over yet?

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By *ife NinjaMan  over a year ago

Dunfermline

Single men pay most. Yeah it sucks, but I like going. I'm a target market and can afford the price. No point getting hawty about it

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By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"Is this thread nearly over yet? "

Nearly there.

But don't worry.

There'll be another asking the same question this time next week no doubt.

A

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple  over a year ago

Manchester-ish


"Is this thread nearly over yet?

Nearly there.

But don't worry.

There'll be another asking the same question this time next week no doubt.

A"

Yay, I'll put it in my diary.

J

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Is this thread nearly over yet? "

One post closer

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By *otSoPoshWoman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Note to self: only people who go to swinger clubs get to talk about swinger clubs.

I don't think that's actually true... but surely it makes sense that people who have experience of a thing would be able to speak more knowledgeably about the thing?

Yeah it does. But the passive aggressive comment I was taking potshots at made no such distinction. I don't go to swinger clubs anymore, doesn't mean I've not gone before in the past to several, and thus I do at least have some experience to base my opinions off on. "

Oh OK. I haven't seen anything I

read as passive aggressive, that must be where I'm confused.

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Is this thread nearly over yet?

Nearly there.

But don't worry.

There'll be another asking the same question this time next week no doubt.

A

Yay, I'll put it in my diary.

J"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Note to self: only people who go to swinger clubs get to talk about swinger clubs.

I don't think that's actually true... but surely it makes sense that people who have experience of a thing would be able to speak more knowledgeably about the thing?

Yeah it does. But the passive aggressive comment I was taking potshots at made no such distinction. I don't go to swinger clubs anymore, doesn't mean I've not gone before in the past to several, and thus I do at least have some experience to base my opinions off on. "

Passive aggressive.

There's been quite a bit of that. Hasn't there?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Note to self: only people who go to swinger clubs get to talk about swinger clubs.

I don't think that's actually true... but surely it makes sense that people who have experience of a thing would be able to speak more knowledgeably about the thing?

Yeah it does. But the passive aggressive comment I was taking potshots at made no such distinction. I don't go to swinger clubs anymore, doesn't mean I've not gone before in the past to several, and thus I do at least have some experience to base my opinions off on. "

Why don’t you go anymore?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Note to self: only people who go to swinger clubs get to talk about swinger clubs.

I don't think that's actually true... but surely it makes sense that people who have experience of a thing would be able to speak more knowledgeably about the thing?

Yeah it does. But the passive aggressive comment I was taking potshots at made no such distinction. I don't go to swinger clubs anymore, doesn't mean I've not gone before in the past to several, and thus I do at least have some experience to base my opinions off on.

Passive aggressive.

There's been quite a bit of that. Hasn't there?"

Of course.

The forums are an exercise in practicing passive aggressiveness it seems! The only question is whether it's done to state uncomfortable perspectives to others, or white knighting to look good to the regular cliques in here.

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By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"Note to self: only people who go to swinger clubs get to talk about swinger clubs.

I don't think that's actually true... but surely it makes sense that people who have experience of a thing would be able to speak more knowledgeably about the thing?"

I didn't see that statement being made either Posh but hey.......

Personally I'd love it if single guys paid less to get in to clubs IF of course it attracted and encouraged the kind of guys that had the right attitude to a club environment, could be guaranteed to behave respectfully and who would boost the chances of other attendees finding good company. An increase in those guys attending would likely encourage more single women and couples to go, which would be a win/win/win for the guys, the couples and the clubs.

Unfortunately that's unlikely to happen, given that higher prices don't seem to deter some absolute idiots from attending under the assumption it entitles them to sex and therefore they can behave like neanderthals which discourages the very women and couples they seek from going back.

It's definitely a minority. But reducing prices is never going to be the solutions to behavioural problems that whilst also occurring in women and couples are far more prevalent amongst men sadly.

One thing our favourite club is doing to hopefully level the field for single guys is to introduce a 'premier' membership option for single guys, not determined by the club but by the couples as women that attend via feedback to management. That way the guys that are positive additions to the club scene are recognised and rewarded.

One small step....but would be a great system to see in place across the club scene nationally.

A

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By *adCherriesCouple  over a year ago

Cheshire/Northwest


"Note to self: only people who go to swinger clubs get to talk about swinger clubs.

I don't think that's actually true... but surely it makes sense that people who have experience of a thing would be able to speak more knowledgeably about the thing?

I didn't see that statement being made either Posh but hey.......

Personally I'd love it if single guys paid less to get in to clubs IF of course it attracted and encouraged the kind of guys that had the right attitude to a club environment, could be guaranteed to behave respectfully and who would boost the chances of other attendees finding good company. An increase in those guys attending would likely encourage more single women and couples to go, which would be a win/win/win for the guys, the couples and the clubs.

Unfortunately that's unlikely to happen, given that higher prices don't seem to deter some absolute idiots from attending under the assumption it entitles them to sex and therefore they can behave like neanderthals which discourages the very women and couples they seek from going back.

It's definitely a minority. But reducing prices is never going to be the solutions to behavioural problems that whilst also occurring in women and couples are far more prevalent amongst men sadly.

One thing our favourite club is doing to hopefully level the field for single guys is to introduce a 'premier' membership option for single guys, not determined by the club but by the couples as women that attend via feedback to management. That way the guys that are positive additions to the club scene are recognised and rewarded.

One small step....but would be a great system to see in place across the club scene nationally.

A"

Thats an excellent idea

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple  over a year ago

Manchester-ish


"Note to self: only people who go to swinger clubs get to talk about swinger clubs.

I don't think that's actually true... but surely it makes sense that people who have experience of a thing would be able to speak more knowledgeably about the thing?

I didn't see that statement being made either Posh but hey.......

Personally I'd love it if single guys paid less to get in to clubs IF of course it attracted and encouraged the kind of guys that had the right attitude to a club environment, could be guaranteed to behave respectfully and who would boost the chances of other attendees finding good company. An increase in those guys attending would likely encourage more single women and couples to go, which would be a win/win/win for the guys, the couples and the clubs.

Unfortunately that's unlikely to happen, given that higher prices don't seem to deter some absolute idiots from attending under the assumption it entitles them to sex and therefore they can behave like neanderthals which discourages the very women and couples they seek from going back.

It's definitely a minority. But reducing prices is never going to be the solutions to behavioural problems that whilst also occurring in women and couples are far more prevalent amongst men sadly.

One thing our favourite club is doing to hopefully level the field for single guys is to introduce a 'premier' membership option for single guys, not determined by the club but by the couples as women that attend via feedback to management. That way the guys that are positive additions to the club scene are recognised and rewarded.

One small step....but would be a great system to see in place across the club scene nationally.

A"

That is a damn good idea.

J

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Note to self: only people who go to swinger clubs get to talk about swinger clubs.

I don't think that's actually true... but surely it makes sense that people who have experience of a thing would be able to speak more knowledgeably about the thing?

Yeah it does. But the passive aggressive comment I was taking potshots at made no such distinction. I don't go to swinger clubs anymore, doesn't mean I've not gone before in the past to several, and thus I do at least have some experience to base my opinions off on.

Why don’t you go anymore?"

Didn't like how blatant the gender differentiated pricing was. Also had a couple bad experiences in the past in swinger clubs where I was used by men in there to big themselves up as more well endowed studs to the women there. Didn't like the undercurrent of competition for attention and lust so to speak.

Mind you. The last time I went to one was in 2017. So it's been years ago now.

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By *ove2pleaseseukMan  over a year ago

Hastings


"What are your thoughts on the different pricing structures for single males, single females, couples, TV and TS?

Surely, if all genders are treated equally, this should also apply to entry prices. "

Is it not just old fashend supply and demand.

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"Note to self: only people who go to swinger clubs get to talk about swinger clubs.

I don't think that's actually true... but surely it makes sense that people who have experience of a thing would be able to speak more knowledgeably about the thing?

I didn't see that statement being made either Posh but hey.......

Personally I'd love it if single guys paid less to get in to clubs IF of course it attracted and encouraged the kind of guys that had the right attitude to a club environment, could be guaranteed to behave respectfully and who would boost the chances of other attendees finding good company. An increase in those guys attending would likely encourage more single women and couples to go, which would be a win/win/win for the guys, the couples and the clubs.

Unfortunately that's unlikely to happen, given that higher prices don't seem to deter some absolute idiots from attending under the assumption it entitles them to sex and therefore they can behave like neanderthals which discourages the very women and couples they seek from going back.

It's definitely a minority. But reducing prices is never going to be the solutions to behavioural problems that whilst also occurring in women and couples are far more prevalent amongst men sadly.

One thing our favourite club is doing to hopefully level the field for single guys is to introduce a 'premier' membership option for single guys, not determined by the club but by the couples as women that attend via feedback to management. That way the guys that are positive additions to the club scene are recognised and rewarded.

One small step....but would be a great system to see in place across the club scene nationally.

A"

That's a fantastic idea

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

 

By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Note to self: only people who go to swinger clubs get to talk about swinger clubs.

I don't think that's actually true... but surely it makes sense that people who have experience of a thing would be able to speak more knowledgeably about the thing?

I didn't see that statement being made either Posh but hey.......

Personally I'd love it if single guys paid less to get in to clubs IF of course it attracted and encouraged the kind of guys that had the right attitude to a club environment, could be guaranteed to behave respectfully and who would boost the chances of other attendees finding good company. An increase in those guys attending would likely encourage more single women and couples to go, which would be a win/win/win for the guys, the couples and the clubs.

Unfortunately that's unlikely to happen, given that higher prices don't seem to deter some absolute idiots from attending under the assumption it entitles them to sex and therefore they can behave like neanderthals which discourages the very women and couples they seek from going back.

It's definitely a minority. But reducing prices is never going to be the solutions to behavioural problems that whilst also occurring in women and couples are far more prevalent amongst men sadly.

One thing our favourite club is doing to hopefully level the field for single guys is to introduce a 'premier' membership option for single guys, not determined by the club but by the couples as women that attend via feedback to management. That way the guys that are positive additions to the club scene are recognised and rewarded.

One small step....but would be a great system to see in place across the club scene nationally.

A

That is a damn good idea.

J"

Ooooh.

Open to all kinds of abuse!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Note to self: only people who go to swinger clubs get to talk about swinger clubs.

I don't think that's actually true... but surely it makes sense that people who have experience of a thing would be able to speak more knowledgeably about the thing?

I didn't see that statement being made either Posh but hey.......

Personally I'd love it if single guys paid less to get in to clubs IF of course it attracted and encouraged the kind of guys that had the right attitude to a club environment, could be guaranteed to behave respectfully and who would boost the chances of other attendees finding good company. An increase in those guys attending would likely encourage more single women and couples to go, which would be a win/win/win for the guys, the couples and the clubs.

Unfortunately that's unlikely to happen, given that higher prices don't seem to deter some absolute idiots from attending under the assumption it entitles them to sex and therefore they can behave like neanderthals which discourages the very women and couples they seek from going back.

It's definitely a minority. But reducing prices is never going to be the solutions to behavioural problems that whilst also occurring in women and couples are far more prevalent amongst men sadly.

One thing our favourite club is doing to hopefully level the field for single guys is to introduce a 'premier' membership option for single guys, not determined by the club but by the couples as women that attend via feedback to management. That way the guys that are positive additions to the club scene are recognised and rewarded.

One small step....but would be a great system to see in place across the club scene nationally.

A

Thats an excellent idea "

More than okay with that. it's like implementing the Fab verification system to swinger clubs.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Note to self: only people who go to swinger clubs get to talk about swinger clubs.

I don't think that's actually true... but surely it makes sense that people who have experience of a thing would be able to speak more knowledgeably about the thing?

Yeah it does. But the passive aggressive comment I was taking potshots at made no such distinction. I don't go to swinger clubs anymore, doesn't mean I've not gone before in the past to several, and thus I do at least have some experience to base my opinions off on.

Why don’t you go anymore?

Didn't like how blatant the gender differentiated pricing was. Also had a couple bad experiences in the past in swinger clubs where I was used by men in there to big themselves up as more well endowed studs to the women there. Didn't like the undercurrent of competition for attention and lust so to speak.

Mind you. The last time I went to one was in 2017. So it's been years ago now. "

So effectively men made fun of you for having a small penis?

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Well.

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By *ove2pleaseseukMan  over a year ago

Hastings


"It's not a broken game, and it's not about equality. If you want to go to a party that is an absolute sausage fest then go for it. "

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple  over a year ago

Manchester-ish


"Note to self: only people who go to swinger clubs get to talk about swinger clubs.

I don't think that's actually true... but surely it makes sense that people who have experience of a thing would be able to speak more knowledgeably about the thing?

I didn't see that statement being made either Posh but hey.......

Personally I'd love it if single guys paid less to get in to clubs IF of course it attracted and encouraged the kind of guys that had the right attitude to a club environment, could be guaranteed to behave respectfully and who would boost the chances of other attendees finding good company. An increase in those guys attending would likely encourage more single women and couples to go, which would be a win/win/win for the guys, the couples and the clubs.

Unfortunately that's unlikely to happen, given that higher prices don't seem to deter some absolute idiots from attending under the assumption it entitles them to sex and therefore they can behave like neanderthals which discourages the very women and couples they seek from going back.

It's definitely a minority. But reducing prices is never going to be the solutions to behavioural problems that whilst also occurring in women and couples are far more prevalent amongst men sadly.

One thing our favourite club is doing to hopefully level the field for single guys is to introduce a 'premier' membership option for single guys, not determined by the club but by the couples as women that attend via feedback to management. That way the guys that are positive additions to the club scene are recognised and rewarded.

One small step....but would be a great system to see in place across the club scene nationally.

A

That is a damn good idea.

J

Ooooh.

Open to all kinds of abuse!"

I suppose so. On paper, it has some merits though. Let's start a new thread to discuss them

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Note to self: only people who go to swinger clubs get to talk about swinger clubs.

I don't think that's actually true... but surely it makes sense that people who have experience of a thing would be able to speak more knowledgeably about the thing?

I didn't see that statement being made either Posh but hey.......

Personally I'd love it if single guys paid less to get in to clubs IF of course it attracted and encouraged the kind of guys that had the right attitude to a club environment, could be guaranteed to behave respectfully and who would boost the chances of other attendees finding good company. An increase in those guys attending would likely encourage more single women and couples to go, which would be a win/win/win for the guys, the couples and the clubs.

Unfortunately that's unlikely to happen, given that higher prices don't seem to deter some absolute idiots from attending under the assumption it entitles them to sex and therefore they can behave like neanderthals which discourages the very women and couples they seek from going back.

It's definitely a minority. But reducing prices is never going to be the solutions to behavioural problems that whilst also occurring in women and couples are far more prevalent amongst men sadly.

One thing our favourite club is doing to hopefully level the field for single guys is to introduce a 'premier' membership option for single guys, not determined by the club but by the couples as women that attend via feedback to management. That way the guys that are positive additions to the club scene are recognised and rewarded.

One small step....but would be a great system to see in place across the club scene nationally.

A

That is a damn good idea.

J

Ooooh.

Open to all kinds of abuse!"

Its not foolproof or abuse proof but it's a good start I think.

Let the couples and single women there decide on the single male clientele they wish to see more of there. So club owners don't get accused of picking and choosing people by their own bias too.

Then again... Its not much different doing this to say doing private house hot tub parties really where people just RSVP those they've vetted and approved to attend and everyone's guaranteed to have a good time together and nobody gets left out or playing second fiddle.

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