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The fab circus
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By *ickshawed OP Couple
over a year ago
Wolverhampton |
Welcome to the Fab Big Top
Positions available, awaiting nominations.
Who wants to be the ringmaster? The lion tamer? The clowns?
I'll be the sexy lady wearing not very much, selling popcorn and ice-cream from a tray. Not the bearded lady as my husband suggested 
What do you want to be? What other jobs are there?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Welcome to the Fab Big Top
Positions available, awaiting nominations.
Who wants to be the ringmaster? The lion tamer? The clowns?
I'll be the sexy lady wearing not very much, selling popcorn and ice-cream from a tray. Not the bearded lady as my husband suggested
What do you want to be? What other jobs are there? "
Sorry .... sexy lady? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Given the amount of skap I have inexpertly applied I guess I'll have yo be a clown.
+honk honk+
Trowels on offer at Toolstation Jennie  "
Excellent ... just need a scaffolder now |
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I'll sell tickets. I'm terrified of heights and was only give my BAGA4 out of pity so any sort of acrobat is out of the question.
Ooh actually, I'm going to learn to breathe fire. Awesome.
Oops. Sorry about the singed eyebrows 
J |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Given the amount of skap I have inexpertly applied I guess I'll have yo be a clown.
+honk honk+
I'll step in as another clown, if you wouldn't mind helping me apply my slap  "
Sniff my flower ...
+parp!+ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'll sell tickets. I'm terrified of heights and was only give my BAGA4 out of pity so any sort of acrobat is out of the question.
Ooh actually, I'm going to learn to breathe fire. Awesome.
Oops. Sorry about the singed eyebrows
J"
Surely all good dragons can do that already? |
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"I'll sell tickets. I'm terrified of heights and was only give my BAGA4 out of pity so any sort of acrobat is out of the question.
Ooh actually, I'm going to learn to breathe fire. Awesome.
Oops. Sorry about the singed eyebrows
J
Surely all good dragons can do that already?"
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'll sell tickets. I'm terrified of heights and was only give my BAGA4 out of pity so any sort of acrobat is out of the question.
Ooh actually, I'm going to learn to breathe fire. Awesome.
Oops. Sorry about the singed eyebrows
J
Surely all good dragons can do that already?
"
Here we go again with the insults |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'll sell tickets. I'm terrified of heights and was only give my BAGA4 out of pity so any sort of acrobat is out of the question.
Ooh actually, I'm going to learn to breathe fire. Awesome.
Oops. Sorry about the singed eyebrows
J
Surely all good dragons can do that already?
Here we go again with the insults "
An innocent enquiry dear Wonko |
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"I'll sell tickets. I'm terrified of heights and was only give my BAGA4 out of pity so any sort of acrobat is out of the question.
Ooh actually, I'm going to learn to breathe fire. Awesome.
Oops. Sorry about the singed eyebrows
J
Surely all good dragons can do that already?
Here we go again with the insults "
Don’t worry, she's only being a clown so we don't notice she's a Big Top! 
J |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'll sell tickets. I'm terrified of heights and was only give my BAGA4 out of pity so any sort of acrobat is out of the question.
Ooh actually, I'm going to learn to breathe fire. Awesome.
Oops. Sorry about the singed eyebrows
J
Surely all good dragons can do that already?
Here we go again with the insults
Don’t worry, she's only being a clown so we don't notice she's a Big Top!
J"
Big top means something else in some of the clubs I have been to |
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"Given the amount of skap I have inexpertly applied I guess I'll have yo be a clown.
+honk honk+
I'll step in as another clown, if you wouldn't mind helping me apply my slap
Sniff my flower ...
+parp!+"
Only if you help stretch out and blow up my balloons.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Given the amount of skap I have inexpertly applied I guess I'll have yo be a clown.
+honk honk+
I'll step in as another clown, if you wouldn't mind helping me apply my slap
Sniff my flower ...
+parp!+
Only if you help stretch out and blow up my balloons.. "
I can't reply any more ... I have run out of clown noises |
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"Given the amount of skap I have inexpertly applied I guess I'll have yo be a clown.
+honk honk+
I'll step in as another clown, if you wouldn't mind helping me apply my slap
Sniff my flower ...
+parp!+
Only if you help stretch out and blow up my balloons..
I can't reply any more ... I have run out of clown noises"
Would you like to borrow my horn to honk? |
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
"I've changed my mind again. I want someons to throw knives at me. But miss obvs.
J
Or axes, with plaits pinned out to the side?
B"
Why does that make me think of a Popeye sketch with Olive Oil? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I've changed my mind again. I want someons to throw knives at me. But miss obvs.
J
Or axes, with plaits pinned out to the side?
B"
I'll have a go with my chopper... |
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"I've changed my mind again. I want someons to throw knives at me. But miss obvs.
J
Or axes, with plaits pinned out to the side?
B
Why does that make me think of a Popeye sketch with Olive Oil? "
It's a scene in The Vikings that made me feel funny things when I was too young to understand what they were. Can't believe he's just outed me here.
J |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I've changed my mind again. I want someons to throw knives at me. But miss obvs.
J
Or axes, with plaits pinned out to the side?
B
Why does that make me think of a Popeye sketch with Olive Oil?
It's a scene in The Vikings that made me feel funny things when I was too young to understand what they were. Can't believe he's just outed me here.
J"
I remember that scene. It was Kirk Douglas wasn't it? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Given the amount of skap I have inexpertly applied I guess I'll have yo be a clown.
+honk honk+
I thought you'd go for ringmaster. You seem to have mastered the ring round here  "
Oh thats for others to decide |
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"I’d like to ride an elephant 
That can be dangerous, especially if said elephant is in heat.
I like to take risks. How does one ascertain if an elephant is in heat?
"
You just have to sit on it .it be in heat . |
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"I’d like to ride an elephant
That can be dangerous, especially if said elephant is in heat.
I like to take risks. How does one ascertain if an elephant is in heat? "
When his empire building moustache falls off |
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"I’d like to ride an elephant
That can be dangerous, especially if said elephant is in heat.
I like to take risks. How does one ascertain if an elephant is in heat?
When his empire building moustache falls off "
Or when the ends curl upwards like a fortune-telling fish. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’d like to ride an elephant
That can be dangerous, especially if said elephant is in heat.
I like to take risks. How does one ascertain if an elephant is in heat? "
Maybe when it's being chased by the bull elephant..? |
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"I’d like to ride an elephant
That can be dangerous, especially if said elephant is in heat.
I like to take risks. How does one ascertain if an elephant is in heat?
When his empire building moustache falls off "
Elephants with moustaches? Unusual |
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"I’d like to ride an elephant
That can be dangerous, especially if said elephant is in heat.
I like to take risks. How does one ascertain if an elephant is in heat?
Maybe when it's being chased by the bull elephant..? "
A fab elephant indeed - with claims of being a bull. Is he also a discrete, professional bull? |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Welcome to the Fab Big Top
Positions available, awaiting nominations.
Who wants to be the ringmaster? The lion tamer? The clowns?
I'll be the sexy lady wearing not very much, selling popcorn and ice-cream from a tray. Not the bearded lady as my husband suggested
What do you want to be? What other jobs are there? "
The last time I took on a circus role was at a Fab club social we organised where, in a moment of genius given it gets fucking hot in a club packed with horny bastards, I wore a lion onesie.
And I melted.
So I'll opt for anything that involves wearing as little as possible. Maybe a trapeze artist in a skimpy mankini.
A |
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"I’d like to ride an elephant
That can be dangerous, especially if said elephant is in heat.
I like to take risks. How does one ascertain if an elephant is in heat?
Maybe when it's being chased by the bull elephant..?
A fab elephant indeed - with claims of being a bull. Is he also a discrete, professional bull?"
He's brilliant at writing verifications which tell other bulls that they should 'treat her properly'. |
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By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago
Stirling |
"Come on folks we still need tightrope walkers jugglers stilt walkers. And fit women in skimpy outfits to walk around the ring.and dancers horses riders ."
Can I be a skimpy outfit wearing dancer? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Come on folks we still need tightrope walkers jugglers stilt walkers. And fit women in skimpy outfits to walk around the ring.and dancers horses riders .
Can I be a skimpy outfit wearing dancer? "
Type cast? |
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By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago
Stirling |
"Come on folks we still need tightrope walkers jugglers stilt walkers. And fit women in skimpy outfits to walk around the ring.and dancers horses riders .
Can I be a skimpy outfit wearing dancer?
Type cast?"
A well if the shoe fits |
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"Come on folks we still need tightrope walkers jugglers stilt walkers. And fit women in skimpy outfits to walk around the ring.and dancers horses riders .
Can I be a skimpy outfit wearing dancer?
Type cast?"
I was thinking of offering you the bearded lady job as your offsick
|
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"Come on folks we still need tightrope walkers jugglers stilt walkers. And fit women in skimpy outfits to walk around the ring.and dancers horses riders .
Can I be a skimpy outfit wearing dancer? "
Was hopeing you'd be bendy girl
The contortionist |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Come on folks we still need tightrope walkers jugglers stilt walkers. And fit women in skimpy outfits to walk around the ring.and dancers horses riders ."
I don't think I can do any of those...
Ooh. I can ride!
I want to ride |
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"Welcome to the Fab Big Top
Positions available, awaiting nominations.
Who wants to be the ringmaster? The lion tamer? The clowns?
I'll be the sexy lady wearing not very much, selling popcorn and ice-cream from a tray. Not the bearded lady as my husband suggested
What do you want to be? What other jobs are there? "
Can i be the bloke who does the laundry of the lady who sells pop corn etc?
(I find g strings and thongs much easier to clean if theyre still warm as i receive them......i do a very fast 2 week turn around) |
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"Welcome to the Fab Big Top
Positions available, awaiting nominations.
Who wants to be the ringmaster? The lion tamer? The clowns?
I'll be the sexy lady wearing not very much, selling popcorn and ice-cream from a tray. Not the bearded
lady as my husband suggested
What do you want to be? What other jobs are there?
Can i be the bloke who does the laundry of the lady who sells pop corn etc?
(I find g strings and thongs much easier to clean if theyre still warm as i receive them......i do a very fast 2 week turn around)"
Of course behind the scene staff play s vital role but at the moment
We are looking for performers |
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"I'll be the one to tell everyone to fuck off...I mean go home at the end of the show.
Can also stand in for the bearded lady if needed.
"
That's usually a job for the ring master but after the popularity of the GSM . you could do it as part of. Your bearded lady standin role . |
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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago
Transsexual Transylvania |
I can't believe I didn't notice this thread earlier.
Until I can think of something better, I'll be a statuesque girl in an impossibly skimpy and spangly costume, posing and gesturing when someone does something spectacular.
I notice the clown slot is already predictably and ably filled - arOOOOOgah!
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I can't believe I didn't notice this thread earlier.
Until I can think of something better, I'll be a statuesque girl in an impossibly skimpy and spangly costume, posing and gesturing when someone does something spectacular.
I notice the clown slot is already predictably and ably filled - arOOOOOgah!
"
The glamorous assistant! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Can I be the parish council rebel in a village about 6 miles from the circus berating my fellow libertarians that had they approved motion 654 subsection 5 paragraph 2 not only would the fucking circus be in our parish but the muscleman would be giving me something better to than berate aforementioned libertarians. |
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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago
Transsexual Transylvania |
"I can't believe I didn't notice this thread earlier.
Until I can think of something better, I'll be a statuesque girl in an impossibly skimpy and spangly costume, posing and gesturing when someone does something spectacular.
I notice the clown slot is already predictably and ably filled - arOOOOOgah!
The glamorous assistant!"
Indeed. That would be the more efficient way of putting it. Verbal diarrhoea me. |
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"I think you'll find that, like Judge Dredd, clowns merely have big shoes. 
Wait a minute. Have you seen Judge Dredd’s cock?  "
The Sylvester Stallone one is on google but not sure about Karl Urbans |
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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago
Transsexual Transylvania |
"I think you'll find that, like Judge Dredd, clowns merely have big shoes.
Wait a minute. Have you seen Judge Dredd’s cock? "
I've seen his Lawgiver, and that's pretty big! It's a metaphor |
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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago
Transsexual Transylvania |
"I would like to be a type of secret kissing both glory hole.
Me in a box with various holes for you to put whatever you want inside x"
You'll end up covered in sweer wrappers and half eaten toffee apples. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'll just sell the tickets, maybe get a separated.. divorced.. single woman the best seats for her and her kids that she promised she'd bring...you know ..be kind to her .. without any hidden agendas...make her night ...it happens you know. |
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"Suggest a position for me
Based on your profile pic I would suggest. You be one of tent erectors
Excellent comment! "
I try my best but I'd rather had not seen it but it was so obvious a perfect role for him and we need
Other staff as well as performers
I think at this rate we will need do continuation of this thread brillent idea from Rickshawed
|
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"Stilt walker please.
Just so I know what it's like to be tall and look down on people instead of it being the other way round. "
You would look hot doing this! I can imagine you with some of those LED wings too 
J |
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"I think at this rate we will need do continuation of this thread brillent idea from Rickshawed
I think that was the kiss of death  "
Well only time will tell its a great thread I think its done well and still got plenty of life in it. |
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