I was browsing around the linens department in John Lewis when I overheard a elderly gentleman ask the store assistant, " I am looking for a pillow. It must be a hard pillow. It's for my wife, she likes it hard, you know..."
A lady nearby quipped, "Don't we all."
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By *haunMan
over a year ago
Halton |
The OP does take me back a little to something that was said to me once in a shop.
Back in 1999 I had gone to pick up the 2nd Umajets album I had pre-ordered.
HMV I think?
So I went to the desk to pick up the album.
And the lady behind the counter went off to find it.
Handing me my album, she said "Swollen and Tender" (the name of the album)
that is just like me first thing in the morning.  |
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"The OP does take me back a little to something that was said to me once in a shop.
Back in 1999 I had gone to pick up the 2nd Umajets album I had pre-ordered.
HMV I think?
So I went to the desk to pick up the album.
And the lady behind the counter went off to find it.
Handing me my album, she said "Swollen and Tender" (the name of the album)
that is just like me first thing in the morning. "
Swollen & tender first thing in a morning? Who's been throwing you round the bedroom then? Spill!!  |
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By *haunMan
over a year ago
Halton |
"
Swollen & tender first thing in a morning? Who's been throwing you round the bedroom then? Spill!! "
That is why I don't do joke or anecdotes.
You know I only like things gentle and naughty
No...
It was the woman who said being "swollen and tender" was like her first thing in the morning.  |
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By *igTeeMan
over a year ago
Bradford |
The wife just sent me a text:
"I'm lying in bed with only a tanga on! What r u up to?"
"I've just pulled a lovely, juicy bogey out of my nose," I wrote back.
"Why do u have to write such disgusting texts?" came the reply.
I texted back, "You fucking started it!"
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