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If Your Genitals Could Talk

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By *hePerkyPumpkin OP   TV/TS  over a year ago

Bristol

What would they say?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

God I'm swollen

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Ouch

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Why am I blue?

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Feed me

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By *educing_EmCouple  over a year ago

Tipperary

Leave me alone probably

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By *ormerWelshcouple2020Man  over a year ago

Stourbridge

Hello, is there anybody there?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Why you ignoring me

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By *odgerMooreMan  over a year ago

Nowhere

Id have to pay them to keep quiet!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

"Oh no, not again. Im trying to sleep"

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By *ools and the brainCouple  over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

Can you smell fish

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By *den_GCCouple  over a year ago

San Fernando, Gran Canaria

Just leave me alone! I'm tired!

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By *valanche1001Man  over a year ago

Leeds

Hey! Careful with those clippers!

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By *orthampton jamesMan  over a year ago

Northampton

Oh bollocks, here we go again with the self abuse

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman  over a year ago

Carlisle usually

Please. Yes. Thank you.

They're needy as fuck but considerably more polite than the rest of me

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Suck me suck me suck me suck me suck me

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By *ack NewhouseMan  over a year ago

Sheffield

Mah Na Mah Na...

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By *ools and the brainCouple  over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

Actually mine would probably say " hello HELLO is anyone there?

Remember me down here hiding in this thicket of hair,yoooouuwhoooo"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Who's the dick now mate

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By *andycandy88Woman  over a year ago

Northolt

Hurry up and get better, I want to play

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

They would say....

You know you want it, you know that on that first touch you're goung to want it even more, when the tip just touches you know you'll want it good, that first push in, that glorious divine pleasurable feeling, that just keeps coming until.....

Actually I may need to delete the word would out if my first sentence

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Lick me til I scream....

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By *valanche1001Man  over a year ago

Leeds


"They would say....

You know you want it, you know that on that first touch you're goung to want it even more, when the tip just touches you know you'll want it good, that first push in, that glorious divine pleasurable feeling, that just keeps coming until.....

Actually I may need to delete the word would out if my first sentence "

NURSE!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Keep your fucking hands off me!

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By *ontWannaMissASwingCouple  over a year ago

Bristol

Ouch - what the hell was that?!, after yesterday's first ever waxing.

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By *a LunaWoman  over a year ago

South Wales

Put the cucumber down and step away from the marrows.

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By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"Put the cucumber down and step away from the marrows."

How about 'you'd damn well better wait til that apple pie has cooled or there'll be trouble..... '

A

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By *iddlesticksMan  over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

Mine actually can.

Currently they are rehearsing for a stage production of

The life and times of grizzly Adams.

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By *cottish guy 555Man  over a year ago

London

Sorry

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By *ymbunnyfitCouple  over a year ago

East Yorkshire

Do it again!

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By *he AmbassadorMan  over a year ago

IRLANDA. / Prague. / Cil Dara


"What would they say? "
hey man dont shave my ginger wolly coat away.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We stopped talking months ago.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

'Stop with the teasing and get on with it '

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Please release me let me go

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Mine actually can.

The other day they said ‘Tottenham are quite a good team’ and ‘men have it easy on fab’.

I just looked at them and said ‘you’re talking bollocks’.

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By *elix SightedMan  over a year ago

Cloud 8

Argh help , lads, he’s trying to str@ngle me again!!

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By *ehindHerEyesCouple  over a year ago

SomewhereOnlyWeKnow

Corporal punishment was banned years ago bruh

Marc

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By *TG3Man  over a year ago

Dorchester


"What would they say? "
its dark in my pants

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By *mashingPumpkinMan  over a year ago

Carmarthen

Please don’t stuff me up there again!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Feed me lol

Or ‘I can take bigger’

Lol

X

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By *inger_SnapWoman  over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

Why is no one paying me any attention...

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By *stoppMan  over a year ago

Durham

In my teen years, Ohh Please leave me alone you've played three times already today..

Now, surely you can muster more than once a week.

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By *opman121Man  over a year ago

stoke on trent

Please empty me before we touch the floor lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 31/03/23 14:01:30]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 31/03/23 14:01:34]

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By *adyBugsWoman  over a year ago

cognito

They are thirsty for peen. It’s been a long time…bring a duster in case of cobwebs.

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By *wist my nipplesCouple  over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

FFS woman, put the wand away!

Mrs TMN x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Where's my hat? I'm going in!

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By *elix SightedMan  over a year ago

Cloud 8

Oh no, it’s gone dark!

Oh wait, it’s light again.

Oh no, it’s gone dark!

Oh wait, it’s light again.

Oh no, it’s gone dark!

Oh wait, it’s light again.

Oh no, it’s gone dark!

Oh wait, it’s light again.

.

Oops I’ve been sick…..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Put the googly eyes away

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Mine is requesting a wheelbarrow for extra support and weight distribution haha

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman  over a year ago

Carlisle usually


"Put the googly eyes away "

NO.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

They'll say...yayyyy, gimme, gimme, gimme

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By *evils89Couple  over a year ago

Newark

Take that carrot away I'm not fuckin vegan

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By *otsossieMan  over a year ago

Chesterfield

Dark in ‘ere.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Put the googly eyes away

NO."

I did offer to let you decorate it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Stop letting me make decisions. Use your brain for god sake.

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By * Le ShhhhhMan  over a year ago

Nottingham


"Stop letting me make decisions. Use your brain for god sake. "

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By *ife NinjaMan  over a year ago

Dunfermline

You've been made redundant

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By *oodmessMan  over a year ago

yumsville

Don't slap the balls, caress the balls, treat them like fine wine and a plate of fruit pastilles

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By *avinaTVTV/TS  over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania

"Wtf have I done to deserve being locked up in this tiny plastic thing?? )

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'll stand up for you when it matters

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Oh no, not the wax again

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