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Age difference in partners
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Was wondering what people’s views are on what is an acceptable difference in age between partners these days. As a female friend has just had a fling with a guy nearly thirty five years younger than herself, which has caused a bit of a debate and would it be viewed differently if a guy was dating a lady that much younger?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It depends how you’d feel about it in that relationship and no f’cker else’s.
Me? Age is just a number, if their maturity/immaturity matches mine, then I’m all good. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Age is just a number and attraction for me is about the whole package.
If when I'm 60 some hot 25 year old man fancied me I'd be surprised, flattered and if there was a spark maybe I would have a little fling. Who knows but oddly I wouldn't right now as its too close to my sons age .
I imagine though I'd be judged heavily for it .
Guess when you get older ego or knowing yourself better probably plays a much bigger part. I'm writing this hoping I'm not offending anyone.
Currently I find it odd being called 'an older woman ' as I don't feel I am one and don't like the idea of being something to try on someone's fuckit list but in 25 years time I could be totally embracing that..who knows.
Ultimately if they are happy other people's opinions shouldn't matter but it seems to be far more complex than that in these kinds of situations.
Would it be viewed differently for a man? I'd like to think I wouldn't view it differently but having seen my aunts husband leave her for someone 30 years younger, I did slate them both a lot .
Life is short though. Chemistry is rare and that's what counts . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Can’t say we feel any per of way about other peoples preferences. Who people do or don’t want to have fun with is their business alone.
Our preference is between 25-50 but I wouldn’t say it’s a hard rule, we’ve just found we connect with people in that bracket the best. |
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I've never subscribed to the age is just a number approach but speaking personally I've no interest in anyone in the same age range as my daughters who are in their late 20s and early 30s.
In the past I have had couples with large age gaps get in touch because the young woman wanted to try an older man.
They got around my filters because the male half was much older but they didn't seem to understand why I wasn't interested and one actually asked why I didn't realise they were doing me a favour? |
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
I don't have a problem with age at all but I did start seeing a guy 15 years older than me who was funny about it.
He kept saying I could find someone younger and he'd understand etc and no matter what I said about not caring about age in the end it did finish. It was a shame as we got on great and the sex was amazing.
If you click you click |
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
I should probably add from my point I wouldn't go 15 years younger as that is close to my son's age and if feel a bit weird - but maybe that will change in the future I can't say |
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By *tuvyMan
over a year ago
bedford |
"I should probably add from my point I wouldn't go 15 years younger as that is close to my son's age and if feel a bit weird - but maybe that will change in the future I can't say "
Even if he was really good looking? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For sex, doesn't matter at all.
Relationships, yeah I wouldn't go too far either way (8 years maybe?) Just because of where we are at life etc things like that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In theory I'm fine with it, in reality I wouldn't be thrilled if one of my kids were in a relationship with someone considerably older while in their twenties, I just feel the gap in life experience makes them vulnerable at that stage. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Think it’s different for men that it is women as men get older seem to be surplus to requirements when women get older blokes are like flys round shit
Stresses only my opinion |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have been in a relationship with an older man and as time went on it took a toll
I tried the cougar thing but i find tht younger guys lack maturity and have a sense of arrogance... on fab anyway
I have an adult son so guys below 30 give me the ick
So i'll stick to what works for me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Remember when I (mr) was younger, a friend of the ex was at the time 19 and was fucking a 60 year old, at the time it was like what’s going on here, she was quite pretty with a decent body just a bit of an airhead obviously, at my age now I couldn’t be with someone as young as that
But each to their own! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've no opinion on others age gaps not my business. Myself I like older for relationships when I was 21 I dated a 42 year old , my last relationship was 17 year gap. I'm just not into under 30 personally but not super strict |
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My FWB is 34 years younger than me but as the saying goes she has an old head on her young shoulders. We get on well, share similar interests and share almost identical sense of humour. For the time that we are together it’s like a relationship without any kind of baggage.
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
"I should probably add from my point I wouldn't go 15 years younger as that is close to my son's age and if feel a bit weird - but maybe that will change in the future I can't say
Even if he was really good looking?"
It's not about looks for me - it's if he can get my mind going enough to get my legs open |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
There's definitely some discrepancy in how it's viewed. Men are often called dirty old men, told women are only interested in their money etc when they're older and interested in younger.
I don't really mind age gaps - I prefer men older although I'm quickly warming to less of an age gap than I thought I'd like. A lot less.
I think, sex? If you're both consenting adults, both happy, then go for it. The murky area is when age/experience is used to control in a relationship. |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"For sex, doesn't matter at all.
Relationships, yeah I wouldn't go too far either way (8 years maybe?) Just because of where we are at life etc things like that "
Yeah. Any relationship where the age gap is over a decade is doomed.
A
*fuck. Hang on a second.......
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"For sex, doesn't matter at all.
Relationships, yeah I wouldn't go too far either way (8 years maybe?) Just because of where we are at life etc things like that
Yeah. Any relationship where the age gap is over a decade is doomed.
A
*fuck. Hang on a second.......
"
My partner is 17 years older than me. Twice as much as the recommended 8. Guess we're doomed as well. |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
All my partners have been older than me. Some by 4 years other by 15 years and upwards. I do have a thing for more mature men (my filters don’t currently reflect that as I’m not looking to meet). I’ve never had any concerns about it, it’s their humour I’m interested not their experiences of ancient history |
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I think it depends on the younger person's age rather than the gap. 50 year old and a 30 year old, fine with me. But I've seen couples profiles where the guy will be 40 and the woman is in her early twenties and it just gives me the ick. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Age is only a number. My husband is 15 years older than myself. Makes absolutely no difference to us at all. Each to their own. Crack on with it
Mrs C xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If they’re both consenting adults then I don’t see an issue really. Well maybe I’d raise an eyebrow if some 50/60 year old was with an 18 year old. For me personally my limit is about 10 to 15 years older than me and about 5 ish years younger. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't judge the couples where 1 of them is 40s and the other early 20s. I actually find it hot though obviously being into age gap stuff.
But away from hotness, if they're happy and it works, there probably is some dynamic of I'm the older provider and she's the one I provide for - but if it works it works! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it largely depends on the dynamic of the couple. I had an FB that was 15 years older than me.
It soon became apparent our sex drive and willingness to try new things were world's apart. It was missionary only and she wouldn't suck cock so it was game over. |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
It’s just a number it doesn’t indicate wisdom, maturity or experience , some people my age have none at all , but some girls I know early 30s who have travelled & lived in various countries since 18 have a huge amount.
Also attitude , I like the younger , fluid & forward looking attitudes , the backward looking and often fixed mindset is a huge turn off.
I don’t want to reminisce listening to 80s music talking about how things used to be , I want to discover new bands and talk about how things are going to be |
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Socially and professionally I think a mix of ages is good. Younger for fresh ideas and risk taking, older for experience and a steadying hand.
Sexually for me personally I prefer a similar age to me. That is almost entirely due to me assuming that the realities of a person my age will not live up to a younger man's fantasies of same
Relationships are different, if you click, you click.
I don't subscribe to the 'age is just a number' theory myself. People's age does define them in the eyes of others even if not their own |
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My last meet, quite recently in fact, was with someone 25 years younger than me. The meet was arranged almost four months in advance, having chatted for many months beforehand with no expectations.
In the lead up to meeting I spent weeks and months thinking long and hard about my moral compass, soul-searching, receiving counsel, advice and reassurance from my close Fab friends who gave me a balanced view to settle my butterflies. I was mindful about the age gap and wasn't going to be cavalier in my approach to sleeping with someone so relatively 'young'. However, her general outlook on life, maturity and sensibilities totally offset my concerns around the issue of age.
I don't think I've ever applied so much due diligence in meeting someone. This was unpre_edented.
I have no regrets; only wonderful memories that will linger and endure. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For sex, doesn't matter at all.
Relationships, yeah I wouldn't go too far either way (8 years maybe?) Just because of where we are at life etc things like that
Yeah. Any relationship where the age gap is over a decade is doomed.
A
*fuck. Hang on a second.......
My partner is 17 years older than me. Twice as much as the recommended 8. Guess we're doomed as well."
Mine is 15 years older still going strong for now |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My last meet, quite recently in fact, was with someone 25 years younger than me. The meet was arranged almost four months in advance, having chatted for many months beforehand with no expectations.
In the lead up to meeting I spent weeks and months thinking long and hard about my moral compass, soul-searching, receiving counsel, advice and reassurance from my close Fab friends who gave me a balanced view to settle my butterflies. I was mindful about the age gap and wasn't going to be cavalier in my approach to sleeping with someone so relatively 'young'. However, her general outlook on life, maturity and sensibilities totally offset my concerns around the issue of age.
I don't think I've ever applied so much due diligence in meeting someone. This was unpre_edented.
I have no regrets; only wonderful memories that will linger and endure."
You seedy dawg jokes! |
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If there are no bad intentions involved then I strongly feel that age is just a number.
My best friend (female) is 28 and her husband is 60 this year. They are perfect for each other and the age gap doesn’t matter. If you love found the right person for you and you’re happy then what difference does it make? That choice doesn’t impact anyone else but the two people in the relationship and it’s their life. And let’s face it, life is far too short to worry about what other people think… No different the the controversy of swinging, you could say! Not everyone gets it but if you’re happy and no one’s getting hurt then bloody well go for it |
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"My last meet, quite recently in fact, was with someone 25 years younger than me. The meet was arranged almost four months in advance, having chatted for many months beforehand with no expectations.
In the lead up to meeting I spent weeks and months thinking long and hard about my moral compass, soul-searching, receiving counsel, advice and reassurance from my close Fab friends who gave me a balanced view to settle my butterflies. I was mindful about the age gap and wasn't going to be cavalier in my approach to sleeping with someone so relatively 'young'. However, her general outlook on life, maturity and sensibilities totally offset my concerns around the issue of age.
I don't think I've ever applied so much due diligence in meeting someone. This was unpre_edented.
I have no regrets; only wonderful memories that will linger and endure.
·
You seedy dawg jokes!"
•
"Deputy Dawg" to you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If there are no bad intentions involved then I strongly feel that age is just a number.
My best friend (female) is 28 and her husband is 60 this year. They are perfect for each other and the age gap doesn’t matter. If you love found the right person for you and you’re happy then what difference does it make? That choice doesn’t impact anyone else but the two people in the relationship and it’s their life. And let’s face it, life is far too short to worry about what other people think… No different the the controversy of swinging, you could say! Not everyone gets it but if you’re happy and no one’s getting hurt then bloody well go for it "
|
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I think it partly depends on the youngest age. For example I think most people would see a 25 year age gap far more acceptable between a 40 year old and a 65 year old than they would an 19 year old and 44 year old.
Personally I think age is just a number and as a general rule between adults it doesn't bother me. However when one part of the couple is very young, lacking in life experience and self growth I would definitely cast over a suspicious eye. Especially on the older person. These kind of age gaps (not always) have an air of abuse of power dynamic and feel a little predatory. But I take people as I find them and as long as a relationship is happy and it's foundations are good and healthy then all is good with me.
Mr |
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Age isn't just a number though. It is for short term relationships but if your going to get involved for the long term it matters. You gave to take into account that your going to get older. If you turn 50 do you want to be with someone of 8o with their ailments.
When I got involved with my late partner who was 22 years older I had a deep conversation with myself about the future and decided it was worth it which it was. We spent many happy years together but as he got older he got ailments. Could you cope with that?
He died at 79 and I was 57 we spent our whole time living in the moment because we knew we had a short time compared to same age relationships. We spent 16 happy years together and although we thought we had a bit more time I don't regret one minute of being with him. But these are the things you have to think about when you get into a long term age difference relationship |
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"Age isn't just a number though. It is for short term relationships but if your going to get involved for the long term it matters. You gave to take into account that your going to get older. If you turn 50 do you want to be with someone of 8o with their ailments.
When I got involved with my late partner who was 22 years older I had a deep conversation with myself about the future and decided it was worth it which it was. We spent many happy years together but as he got older he got ailments. Could you cope with that?
He died at 79 and I was 57 we spent our whole time living in the moment because we knew we had a short time compared to same age relationships. We spent 16 happy years together and although we thought we had a bit more time I don't regret one minute of being with him. But these are the things you have to think about when you get into a long term age difference relationship"
Quite agree with you, I do think about her and yes sometimes want her to find another guy more her age and shamefully will admit have tried to push her away, but she seems so happy and we do love each other. So at the moment settling for enjoying every moment and loving it. |
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