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How is your mental health?

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By *rtyIan OP   Man  over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons

Good morning lounge dwellers, weekly check in to see how we are all feeling.

Mine was up and down last week but I had a good weekend and I have decided to take a break from the booze, I been kicking the arse out of it lately and I know it only temporarily masks the issue, but the reality is it just compounds the issue. So new week new opportunities, weather permitting I shall be back in the river this week for my cold water stuff, being among nature in my happy space.

Hope you are all as well as can be and remember ITS OK TO NOT BE OK

My ears always here

Take care and have a great week

Much love to you all xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Good luck with the cold water activities OP!

I’m ok, as usual. As I’ve got older I’m lucky in that I’ve learnt more to let things wash over me and as a result things don’t tend to stress me out very often, although I do realise I am lucky in this respect and that it’s not so easy for everyone depending on their own circumstances.

So yeah, absolutely, it’s ok to not be ok and I hope anyone who is struggling are able to find some support and peace

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple  over a year ago

Leeds

Fucked as always. Just the way I like it.

The mr

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm feeling good at the moment also Arty. Had a lovely day with my daughter yesterday. I've got this week off work and I've planned a little solo road trip which I'm quite proud of myself for doing

Glad you are feeling better and giving the booze a rest is a great idea x

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By *rtyIan OP   Man  over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons


"I'm feeling good at the moment also Arty. Had a lovely day with my daughter yesterday. I've got this week off work and I've planned a little solo road trip which I'm quite proud of myself for doing

Glad you are feeling better and giving the booze a rest is a great idea x"

good for you getting out on a rd trip x

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By *eorge1949Man  over a year ago

BroadwayWR11

Asking anyone to assess their own mental health is a bit like asking a dodgy car salesman if the cars he sells have any known faults!

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By *rtyIan OP   Man  over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons


"Asking anyone to assess their own mental health is a bit like asking a dodgy car salesman if the cars he sells have any known faults!"

not looking for a clinical assessment or prognosis

its just a weekly post that people check in

as they say its good to talk

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 20/03/23 11:08:30]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Not bad black dog has gone more physical pain is reminding me of,no flashback so today is good take it as a win

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By *ohn KanakaMan  over a year ago

Not all that North of North London


"Asking anyone to assess their own mental health is a bit like asking a dodgy car salesman if the cars he sells have any known faults!"

I think that's quite disrespectful and lacking in empathy and knowledge.

Those of us who have struggled for years often have an excellent understanding of our mental health and know when we are doing okay and when we are struggling

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Fucked as always. Just the way I like it.

The mr "

Ditto

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By *rtyIan OP   Man  over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons


"Asking anyone to assess their own mental health is a bit like asking a dodgy car salesman if the cars he sells have any known faults!

I think that's quite disrespectful and lacking in empathy and knowledge.

Those of us who have struggled for years often have an excellent understanding of our mental health and know when we are doing okay and when we are struggling "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Asking anyone to assess their own mental health is a bit like asking a dodgy car salesman if the cars he sells have any known faults!"

Are you not aware of your own thoughts and feelings and how they are affecting you and whether you need to do something to look after yourself?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Has been on and off. But I've had lot going on. Hopefully there is a bright future ahead. I can sense it x

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By *rtyIan OP   Man  over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons


"Has been on and off. But I've had lot going on. Hopefully there is a bright future ahead. I can sense it x"

Soon be spring warmer lighter evenings

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By *eorge1949Man  over a year ago

BroadwayWR11


"Asking anyone to assess their own mental health is a bit like asking a dodgy car salesman if the cars he sells have any known faults!

Are you not aware of your own thoughts and feelings and how they are affecting you and whether you need to do something to look after yourself? "

AKA - paralysis by analysis?

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By *rtyIan OP   Man  over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons


"Asking anyone to assess their own mental health is a bit like asking a dodgy car salesman if the cars he sells have any known faults!

Are you not aware of your own thoughts and feelings and how they are affecting you and whether you need to do something to look after yourself?

AKA - paralysis by analysis?"

Nothing to do with knowing your triggers and coping strategies and when to practice some self care

what you have misquoted is below

Analysis paralysis is when the fear of either making an error or forgoing a superior solution outweighs the realistic expectation or potential value of success .

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By *eorge1949Man  over a year ago

BroadwayWR11

My perception is that before the media and the PC brigade got hold of it nobody thought they had a mental health issue but now many have talked themselves into believing that they do and they need special help.

I have always been self reliant, so perhaps I am not best placed to appreciate neediness but my perception is that we, in this country, are turning ourselves into a nation of dependents incapable of running our own lioves without the Government paying for all manner of benefits.

Good job we don't live in Ukraine, Turkey or Syria - how would we cope as a nation?

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By *ohn KanakaMan  over a year ago

Not all that North of North London

[Removed by poster at 20/03/23 13:07:16]

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By *ohn KanakaMan  over a year ago

Not all that North of North London


"My perception is that before the media and the PC brigade got hold of it nobody thought they had a mental health issue but now many have talked themselves into believing that they do and they need special help.

I have always been self reliant, so perhaps I am not best placed to appreciate neediness but my perception is that we, in this country, are turning ourselves into a nation of dependents incapable of running our own lioves without the Government paying for all manner of benefits.

Good job we don't live in Ukraine, Turkey or Syria - how would we cope as a nation?"

I don't thibk you could be more wrong. Attitudes like this literally cost people's lives.

I'm glad you are so string and self resilient, many of us aren't though and it's good to talk and share and empathise. People shouldn’t shut these conversations down

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By *ustamanMan  over a year ago

weymouth

Personally really good, leaving employed work in 9 days plus a couple of really good club visits recently have definitely bouyed my mood

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By *avinaTVTV/TS  over a year ago

Transsexual Transylvania


"My perception is that before the media and the PC brigade got hold of it nobody thought they had a mental health issue but now many have talked themselves into believing that they do and they need special help.

I have always been self reliant, so perhaps I am not best placed to appreciate neediness but my perception is that we, in this country, are turning ourselves into a nation of dependents incapable of running our own lioves without the Government paying for all manner of benefits.

Good job we don't live in Ukraine, Turkey or Syria - how would we cope as a nation?"

My God!!!

You have absolutely no clue, understanding or empathy in the slightest!

Jesus wept!

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By *rtyIan OP   Man  over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons


"My perception is that before the media and the PC brigade got hold of it nobody thought they had a mental health issue but now many have talked themselves into believing that they do and they need special help.

I have always been self reliant, so perhaps I am not best placed to appreciate neediness but my perception is that we, in this country, are turning ourselves into a nation of dependents incapable of running our own lioves without the Government paying for all manner of benefits.

Good job we don't live in Ukraine, Turkey or Syria - how would we cope as a nation?"

So you are saying that mental health issues don't exist and are just made up, that really is some statement to make.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"My perception is that before the media and the PC brigade got hold of it nobody thought they had a mental health issue but now many have talked themselves into believing that they do and they need special help.

I have always been self reliant, so perhaps I am not best placed to appreciate neediness but my perception is that we, in this country, are turning ourselves into a nation of dependents incapable of running our own lioves without the Government paying for all manner of benefits.

Good job we don't live in Ukraine, Turkey or Syria - how would we cope as a nation?"

I am extremely self reliant and extremely strong. Comes from various traumas in my life and having to deal with them on my own in the main.

Seeking help and fighting to overcome your demons is not needy it shows strength.

Open your mind before you comment on a thread that is intended to support people

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By *eorge1949Man  over a year ago

BroadwayWR11

You all have the right to express your views, as do I to disagree all of your broadly incorrect assumptions.

Good job we ain't being invaded innit!

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By *rtyIan OP   Man  over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons


"You all have the right to express your views, as do I to disagree all of your broadly incorrect assumptions.

Good job we ain't being invaded innit!"

never assume anything makes an ass of you and me, you have no idea of anyones story to as you say assume they are incorrect.

And if we were invaded what would you do

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By *ohn KanakaMan  over a year ago

Not all that North of North London


"You all have the right to express your views, as do I to disagree all of your broadly incorrect assumptions.

Good job we ain't being invaded innit!"

I'm genuinely lost by where war comes in to it?

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By *eorge1949Man  over a year ago

BroadwayWR11


"

And if we were invaded what would you do "

Like evryone else I have no idea, but whingeing about every mishap will not help.

Try to survive and don't expect any help from anyone else anytime soon I guess?

How about you.

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By *imi_RougeWoman  over a year ago

Portsmouth


"Asking anyone to assess their own mental health is a bit like asking a dodgy car salesman if the cars he sells have any known faults!"

I actually think people are more honest on here. It's pretty much anonymous if you want it to be.

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By *wingsnroundabouts82Couple  over a year ago

Fucksville

Fucked, but don't know any other way lol x

If anything were to make it better right now would be to have my amazing boss back and to not feel I have to leave the job I love x

It'll all be OK though I'm by no means rock bottom just a bit meh x

Keep going guys and girls x life is what you make it even on the shit days x

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By *imi_RougeWoman  over a year ago

Portsmouth

Mine is currently a roller coaster, I'm not enjoying it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Honestly.... struggling!!!

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By *eorge1949Man  over a year ago

BroadwayWR11


"Mine is currently a roller coaster, I'm not enjoying it."

I've been there too and I wish you all the best for the future.

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By *ohn KanakaMan  over a year ago

Not all that North of North London


"

And if we were invaded what would you do

Like evryone else I have no idea, but whingeing about every mishap will not help.

Try to survive and don't expect any help from anyone else anytime soon I guess?

How about you."

Did yiu just equate mental health with "whinging about every mishap"?

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By *ultured Gent16Man  over a year ago

close.


"

And if we were invaded what would you do

Like evryone else I have no idea, but whingeing about every mishap will not help.

Try to survive and don't expect any help from anyone else anytime soon I guess?

How about you.

Did yiu just equate mental health with "whinging about every mishap"?

"

I think he did you know….

Very erudite.

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By *wingsnroundabouts82Couple  over a year ago

Fucksville

I hadn't scrolled through the answers but seeing some of the recent replies makes me so sad to think how heartless people can be. Unless you've been through it, you know nothing and shouldn't even bother to comment.

I hope MH issues never come your way... Karma...

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By *imi_RougeWoman  over a year ago

Portsmouth


"

Anyone with a chemical imbalance in their brain should be shot and thrown on the scrap heap.

Get an education before you post on topics you either know nothing about or have a complete prejudice regarding.

"

Chemical imbalance is actually a myth...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You all have the right to express your views, as do I to disagree all of your broadly incorrect assumptions.

Good job we ain't being invaded innit!"

It isn't a post asking for people's views on mental health. It's a post asking how is your mental health. If you don't want to share then don't coment

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By *eorge1949Man  over a year ago

BroadwayWR11


"

Did yiu just equate mental health with "whinging about every mishap"?

"

No I did not - you made that 2 + 2 = 5

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By *rtyIan OP   Man  over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons


"

And if we were invaded what would you do

Like evryone else I have no idea, but whingeing about every mishap will not help.

Try to survive and don't expect any help from anyone else anytime soon I guess?

How about you."

Me well theoretically I am still wishing the age to be called back to my regiment that I served in for 12 years from 89 to 2001 in various places, so who knows maybe looking after you,

that would be with the other veterans suffering mental health issues that are made up.

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By *ohn KanakaMan  over a year ago

Not all that North of North London


"

Did yiu just equate mental health with "whinging about every mishap"?

No I did not - you made that 2 + 2 = 5"

Well i based ot on your words. So when yiu said "whinging about every mishap won't help" what did you mean?

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By *ultured Gent16Man  over a year ago

close.


"

Anyone with a chemical imbalance in their brain should be shot and thrown on the scrap heap.

Get an education before you post on topics you either know nothing about or have a complete prejudice regarding.

Chemical imbalance is actually a myth... "

Nessie is a myth.

Chemical imbalance is simply a hypothesis that has yet to be definitively proved or unproved.

Until that proof arrives one way or another I’m open to that explanation for causing my various issues.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Best of luck OP, I hope you find thale formula that puts you on that constant good ground.

Mine has Yo Yo'd since Christmas, due to something that left me questioning people who I held in a very high regard and also feeling like I couldn't turn to those who I normally do due to my handling of the situation.

This weekend was a boiling point for me after realising that, I've been acting out of character and it's not just affecting me it is also affecting friendships/relationships old and new, so I have now put a plan in place to make sure I don't let it continue and spiral any further. Now the hope is that any damage done is repairable.

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By *ilentnoiseMan  over a year ago

Belfast


"My perception is that before the media and the PC brigade got hold of it nobody thought they had a mental health issue but now many have talked themselves into believing that they do and they need special help.

I have always been self reliant, so perhaps I am not best placed to appreciate neediness but my perception is that we, in this country, are turning ourselves into a nation of dependents incapable of running our own lioves without the Government paying for all manner of benefits.

Good job we don't live in Ukraine, Turkey or Syria - how would we cope as a nation?"

You are conflating two different things - everyone has mental health, just like everyone has physical health. Not everyone has mental health issues/problems. The media has done a good job in highlighting the importance of being curious about, and interested in our feelings about things, as a possible way of preventing it leading to mental health problems.

Have you ever been interesed in your own feelings? Might self-reliance be a defence against fears of asking others for help? What is so frightening for you about being dependant on others? Don't you have needs just like any other person? The pejorative use of "neediness" is unhelpful and is not the same as the importance of people being encouraged to 'check in' with themselves and others.

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By *imi_RougeWoman  over a year ago

Portsmouth


"

Anyone with a chemical imbalance in their brain should be shot and thrown on the scrap heap.

Get an education before you post on topics you either know nothing about or have a complete prejudice regarding.

Chemical imbalance is actually a myth...

Nessie is a myth.

Chemical imbalance is simply a hypothesis that has yet to be definitively proved or unproved.

Until that proof arrives one way or another I’m open to that explanation for causing my various issues. "

There's no tests for it, so people shouldn't be diagnosed using that phrase. I was told that when I had severe post natal depression, it was actually vitamin deficiency, but they didn't bother to do blood tests.

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By *ultured Gent16Man  over a year ago

close.


"

Anyone with a chemical imbalance in their brain should be shot and thrown on the scrap heap.

Get an education before you post on topics you either know nothing about or have a complete prejudice regarding.

Chemical imbalance is actually a myth...

Nessie is a myth.

Chemical imbalance is simply a hypothesis that has yet to be definitively proved or unproved.

Until that proof arrives one way or another I’m open to that explanation for causing my various issues.

There's no tests for it, so people shouldn't be diagnosed using that phrase. I was told that when I had severe post natal depression, it was actually vitamin deficiency, but they didn't bother to do blood tests. "

Exactly.

There’s no tests to prove or disprove it.

Therefore I’m open to that hypothesis and interpretation.

It’s a working theory that many credible scientists have leant their weight too.

To say it’s a Myth is a tad dismissive when there’s no proof for it either way.

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By *eorge1949Man  over a year ago

BroadwayWR11


" I was told that when I had severe post natal depression, it was actually vitamin deficiency, but they didn't bother to do blood tests. "

PND IS real - very real - my first wife went though it and it was awful for her and I do sympathise.

Eventually it went away without any obvious reason so there is hope, but it took a while and a lot of support.

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By *rtyIan OP   Man  over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons


" I was told that when I had severe post natal depression, it was actually vitamin deficiency, but they didn't bother to do blood tests.

PND IS real - very real - my first wife went though it and it was awful for her and I do sympathise.

Eventually it went away without any obvious reason so there is hope, but it took a while and a lot of support. "

so some is real not made up by the press etc

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By *ohn KanakaMan  over a year ago

Not all that North of North London


"My perception is that before the media and the PC brigade got hold of it nobody thought they had a mental health issue but now many have talked themselves into believing that they do and they need special help.

"

So mental health is all down to the media and PC brigade

But also because you've personally experienced PND that is real.

So which mental health conditions aren't real?

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By *rystal DreamtimeTV/TS  over a year ago

horsham

Having known someone with mental health problems I’d feel a bit fraudulent saying I have negative issues in this respect ...

How ever I do have a highly emotional side and recently that’s been tested enormously.. I’m aware that emotion can lead to more severe issues so I’m keeping an eye on it ... Remaining strong , eating a good diet and bringing the positives that are in my life to the fore . It can be hard work , so big hugs to all that are struggling and somehow getting on

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By *amesBeelzebubMan  over a year ago

norwich

Mines always the same.

Self doubt

Negativity

No confidence

Anxiety

A mental block that stops me speaking to people yet il walk home a talk bollocks put loud to myself.

I'm a barrel of laughs

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By *rtyIan OP   Man  over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons


"Mines always the same.

Self doubt

Negativity

No confidence

Anxiety

A mental block that stops me speaking to people yet il walk home a talk bollocks put loud to myself.

I'm a barrel of laughs "

talking to yourself is sometimes the best conversation lol

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By *rHotNottsMan  over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I’m okay but a few around me struggling. I noticed a couple of friends self harming so I sent voice notes saying I’m not judging or being nosey, they know what to do better than me, but i just wanted to let them know I noticed and I care and want them to know I’m here if they need anything just ask

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By *rHotNottsMan  over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I was also curious for those who do, if it’s highly visible through black tights , does than mean it’s new and would you go out with a friend and expect them to ask or comment or more likely avoid going out with them ,?

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By *pank the MonkeyCouple  over a year ago

Down the Rabbit Hole and Round the Corner


"Asking anyone to assess their own mental health is a bit like asking a dodgy car salesman if the cars he sells have any known faults!"

What absolute rubbish. Knowing oneself and being in touch with one's mental health is a highly personal thing. Medical diagnosis and how you are currently feeling are two very different things.

I suggest you retract your comment and try to have a better understanding and a broader view.

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By *ingdong11Man  over a year ago

emsworth


"My perception is that before the media and the PC brigade got hold of it nobody thought they had a mental health issue but now many have talked themselves into believing that they do and they need special help.

I have always been self reliant, so perhaps I am not best placed to appreciate neediness but my perception is that we, in this country, are turning ourselves into a nation of dependents incapable of running our own lioves without the Government paying for all manner of benefits.

Good job we don't live in Ukraine, Turkey or Syria - how would we cope as a nation?"

You have got to be joking surely ?

It’s attitudes like yours that cost lives , especially so of men .

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Mine has been pretty good lately. New job, better hours, played with puppies today.

Seeing some of the derogatory comments on here reminds me of how far we still have to go when it comes to educating people on mental health issues and conditions.

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By *ohn KanakaMan  over a year ago

Not all that North of North London


"I was also curious for those who do, if it’s highly visible through black tights , does than mean it’s new and would you go out with a friend and expect them to ask or comment or more likely avoid going out with them ,? "

Personally, if it was a friend that I knew had a history of self harming, I'd bring it up.

If it was a friend who I knew had mental health issues I'd ask how they were but not mention the self harming unless they did

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

A bit fucked this week, too much stuff going on in my personal life… a couple of sad bereavements, financial worries etc etc.

And as yesterday was Mother’s Day it was particularly hard, and the old dears in work kept asking if I have kids. Saying no was easier than the real answer but at least that day is behind us all now.

Looking forward to this week because it can’t be no worse than last, surely

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By *unfunfun xMan  over a year ago

LONDON

It's tough out there in this crazy world but remember there is help for any issues absolutely any issues someone has so don't be embarrassed or worried about reaching out.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Good morning lounge dwellers, weekly check in to see how we are all feeling.

Mine was up and down last week but I had a good weekend and I have decided to take a break from the booze, I been kicking the arse out of it lately and I know it only temporarily masks the issue, but the reality is it just compounds the issue. So new week new opportunities, weather permitting I shall be back in the river this week for my cold water stuff, being among nature in my happy space.

Hope you are all as well as can be and remember ITS OK TO NOT BE OK

My ears always here

Take care and have a great week

Much love to you all xx "

Are you a CPN or a psychologist?

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By *ortyairCouple  over a year ago

Wallasey

Wouldn't normally say anything on here but it's been very hard lately. Not for me but for him.

Watching him and looking after him, is heartbreaking at times x

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By *unfunfun xMan  over a year ago

LONDON


"Wouldn't normally say anything on here but it's been very hard lately. Not for me but for him.

Watching him and looking after him, is heartbreaking at times x"

hope things get better even if its a slow progress it's a improvement

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Halfway down the plug hole

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By *ubbles88555Woman  over a year ago

Inverness

I'm not myself right now really flat! Super stressed with work and assignments for uni and just lost my mojo a bit. It will get better though I have holidays coming up for a break

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By *unfunfun xMan  over a year ago

LONDON

That will do wonders a break from everything and lets hope this summer starts very soon, hot sunny weather raises spirits to some.

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By *inkerbell67Woman  over a year ago

Clacton on sea essex

Today is a good day ,had my hair done and then this evening a photo shoot, but having eupd and autism I never know how I will be ..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

At the moment I’m doing great! Although little things bother me, like busy places and not being able to wear a helmet to go kart with the children (thanks covid care homes/hospitals).

Inbox always open for those who are struggling

Mrs

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By *unfunfun xMan  over a year ago

LONDON

That's a lovely gesture keeping your inbox open for people to talk, makes me think there are good people still around.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Has been on and off. But I've had lot going on. Hopefully there is a bright future ahead. I can sense it x

Soon be spring warmer lighter evenings "

I do struggle from SAD. I'd love travel away for the winter months but I love Christmas in London too much x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I've not been great recently, poor Mr has been putting up with me randomly bursting into tears but life has been quite stressful. I see a therapist and have started going back to the gym which helps a lot with clearing my head.

The more we talk about our mental health, the more mainstream and 'acceptable'it is, rather than being seen as a sign of weakness. Sending a gentle hug to anyone who needs it right now

Mrs

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By *ust RachelTV/TS  over a year ago

Horsham

The last time I posted on a thread like this, I had a message from a very kind woman who said she was here for me to talk. Thank you, in case you read this bit.

The problem was then and still is, that I find it really hard to talk to people. I either feel I will just add to their burden, or could stop me from doing something.

Until recently I could shrug things off quite easily, the older I get the harder it becomes to shrug things off.

In answer to the OPs question, things have been a lot better.

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By *arleybird66Man  over a year ago

wexford


"My perception is that before the media and the PC brigade got hold of it nobody thought they had a mental health issue but now many have talked themselves into believing that they do and they need special help.

I have always been self reliant, so perhaps I am not best placed to appreciate neediness but my perception is that we, in this country, are turning ourselves into a nation of dependents incapable of running our own lioves without the Government paying for all manner of benefits.

Good job we don't live in Ukraine, Turkey or Syria - how would we cope as a nation?"

well was gonna post here but with an attitude like yours wont bother admin can ban me but u are an arsehole with no empathy feelings or understanding of mental health we all suffer its just in the past it was all hid away in mental hospitals asylums and the likes nowadays we have the internet to talk about it and try get it out of our systems as for some people sometimes a simple chat on the likes of here could save a life if u cant see that ur a sad operson and really REALLY need help

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By *esi_maverickMan  over a year ago

Solihull

Mind my language

But it’s well and truly fucked I wish I wasn’t in this world anymore

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By *andycandy88Woman  over a year ago

Northolt


"Mind my language

But it’s well and truly fucked I wish I wasn’t in this world anymore "

I KNOW Exactly what you mean, what a selfish ignorant world but its magical when you come across the opposite of that.

Keeps us going through each day and week and month and year

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By *arleybird66Man  over a year ago

wexford


"Mind my language

But it’s well and truly fucked I wish I wasn’t in this world anymore

I KNOW Exactly what you mean, what a selfish ignorant world but its magical when you come across the opposite of that.

Keeps us going through each day and week and month and year"

if thats ment for me yea sorry about the tone i took but say it as i see it its just sad some people dont aknowledge mental health issues no wonder alot of people hide it and end up doing the unthinkable

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By *alirepublicMan  over a year ago

North East, UK

What can i say, had enough of this bs country and everything in it, might just get a one way ticket tomorrow and fuck off for good

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By *esi_maverickMan  over a year ago

Solihull


"Mind my language

But it’s well and truly fucked I wish I wasn’t in this world anymore

I KNOW Exactly what you mean, what a selfish ignorant world but its magical when you come across the opposite of that.

Keeps us going through each day and week and month and year"

Oh my days thank you for understanding

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By *ig rig hullMan  over a year ago

Hull

Refreshing post to see! Mental health is a serious issue! Iv personally been at the very lowest point and fought my way back to the top!

#itsoktotalk

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By *oubleswing2019Man  over a year ago

Colchester

Personally good. But feeling sad and exasperated with a friend who has clinical depression and has had that for many, many years. We do fun things, enjoy each other's company, share many common interests. But he struggles to express any emotion or discuss personal thoughts and feelings. It's like the most impenetrable barrier I have ever experienced, and it saddens me that even after all these years, I'm still not allowed in. It makes me feel unvalued and questioning myself. Constantly feeling I am failing him, but I just don't know what to do.

So in answer to the OP, I'm fine, but I'm not always fine because another person who I care about is not feeling fine and I don't feel fine because I can't seem to make them feel fine. If that makes sense ?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Refreshing post to see! Mental health is a serious issue! Iv personally been at the very lowest point and fought my way back to the top!

#itsoktotalk"

Agreed

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By *ames-77Man  over a year ago

milton keynes

Mine is good.. mind set and mental health is the one thing we have control over in this world .. if you can't control that your just a feather in the wind

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


".. mind set and mental health is the one thing we have control over in this world .. "

Not for everyone, sadly.

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By *ig rig hullMan  over a year ago

Hull


".. mind set and mental health is the one thing we have control over in this world ..

Not for everyone, sadly."

If we had control over it there wouldn't be as many suicides from people with depression

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By *ames-77Man  over a year ago

milton keynes


".. mind set and mental health is the one thing we have control over in this world ..

Not for everyone, sadly.

If we had control over it there wouldn't be as many suicides from people with depression "

I knew when I commented No one else would understand .. once you accept something it takes control of you .. parents doctors label you medicate you your fucked .. I accept people can feel depressed. I refuse to accept it's an illness

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By *ig rig hullMan  over a year ago

Hull


".. mind set and mental health is the one thing we have control over in this world ..

Not for everyone, sadly.

If we had control over it there wouldn't be as many suicides from people with depression

I knew when I commented No one else would understand .. once you accept something it takes control of you .. parents doctors label you medicate you your fucked .. I accept people can feel depressed. I refuse to accept it's an illness "

Then you need educating a little bro! Coming from experience I know I wasn't myself when I was ill

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


".. mind set and mental health is the one thing we have control over in this world ..

Not for everyone, sadly.

If we had control over it there wouldn't be as many suicides from people with depression

I knew when I commented No one else would understand .. once you accept something it takes control of you .. parents doctors label you medicate you your fucked .. I accept people can feel depressed. I refuse to accept it's an illness "

Depression and anxiety are both classified as mental illnesses. In their own right or as symptoms of other illnesses.

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By *ames-77Man  over a year ago

milton keynes


".. mind set and mental health is the one thing we have control over in this world ..

Not for everyone, sadly.

If we had control over it there wouldn't be as many suicides from people with depression

I knew when I commented No one else would understand .. once you accept something it takes control of you .. parents doctors label you medicate you your fucked .. I accept people can feel depressed. I refuse to accept it's an illness

Then you need educating a little bro! Coming from experience I know I wasn't myself when I was ill"

No I don't need educating .. other people need educating on how the brain works .. it's a powerful thing.. your attitude is implying if you have depression you can't get out of it .. I'm saying you can if you set your mind to it.. your not born depressed it's normally a traumatic event .. and you can get past that

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By *ames-77Man  over a year ago

milton keynes


".. mind set and mental health is the one thing we have control over in this world ..

Not for everyone, sadly.

If we had control over it there wouldn't be as many suicides from people with depression

I knew when I commented No one else would understand .. once you accept something it takes control of you .. parents doctors label you medicate you your fucked .. I accept people can feel depressed. I refuse to accept it's an illness

Depression and anxiety are both classified as mental illnesses. In their own right or as symptoms of other illnesses."

Of course they will be.. get you on the never ending never fixing pharmaceutical drugs

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


".. mind set and mental health is the one thing we have control over in this world ..

Not for everyone, sadly.

If we had control over it there wouldn't be as many suicides from people with depression

I knew when I commented No one else would understand .. once you accept something it takes control of you .. parents doctors label you medicate you your fucked .. I accept people can feel depressed. I refuse to accept it's an illness

Then you need educating a little bro! Coming from experience I know I wasn't myself when I was ill

No I don't need educating .. other people need educating on how the brain works .. it's a powerful thing.. your attitude is implying if you have depression you can't get out of it .. I'm saying you can if you set your mind to it.. your not born depressed it's normally a traumatic event .. and you can get past that "

OK.

You can just decide not to have, for example, PTSD can you? That is massively exciting news.

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By *ig rig hullMan  over a year ago

Hull


".. mind set and mental health is the one thing we have control over in this world ..

Not for everyone, sadly.

If we had control over it there wouldn't be as many suicides from people with depression

I knew when I commented No one else would understand .. once you accept something it takes control of you .. parents doctors label you medicate you your fucked .. I accept people can feel depressed. I refuse to accept it's an illness

Then you need educating a little bro! Coming from experience I know I wasn't myself when I was ill

No I don't need educating .. other people need educating on how the brain works .. it's a powerful thing.. your attitude is implying if you have depression you can't get out of it .. I'm saying you can if you set your mind to it.. your not born depressed it's normally a traumatic event .. and you can get past that "

Of course you can recover from depression! I'm back to my normal self.. I needed a little help with meds but now I don't take anything! It does take a strong mind and will power but also having help around you is key!

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By *ames-77Man  over a year ago

milton keynes


".. mind set and mental health is the one thing we have control over in this world ..

Not for everyone, sadly.

If we had control over it there wouldn't be as many suicides from people with depression

I knew when I commented No one else would understand .. once you accept something it takes control of you .. parents doctors label you medicate you your fucked .. I accept people can feel depressed. I refuse to accept it's an illness

Then you need educating a little bro! Coming from experience I know I wasn't myself when I was ill

No I don't need educating .. other people need educating on how the brain works .. it's a powerful thing.. your attitude is implying if you have depression you can't get out of it .. I'm saying you can if you set your mind to it.. your not born depressed it's normally a traumatic event .. and you can get past that

Of course you can recover from depression! I'm back to my normal self.. I needed a little help with meds but now I don't take anything! It does take a strong mind and will power but also having help around you is key!"

I was also in a very bad place my family tried to get me to take meds luckily my doctor said I'm too strong minded I just need time to heal and sleep properly .. I was in a very bad place 6-7 years ago I'll never let myself be like that again .. I don't accept these thoughts or feelings.. I started kick boxing which was a great help .. you can sit and feel sorry and accept the negativity and fall in a hole or you can say fuck you watch this and push on

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


".. mind set and mental health is the one thing we have control over in this world ..

Not for everyone, sadly.

If we had control over it there wouldn't be as many suicides from people with depression

I knew when I commented No one else would understand .. once you accept something it takes control of you .. parents doctors label you medicate you your fucked .. I accept people can feel depressed. I refuse to accept it's an illness

Then you need educating a little bro! Coming from experience I know I wasn't myself when I was ill

No I don't need educating .. other people need educating on how the brain works .. it's a powerful thing.. your attitude is implying if you have depression you can't get out of it .. I'm saying you can if you set your mind to it.. your not born depressed it's normally a traumatic event .. and you can get past that

Of course you can recover from depression! I'm back to my normal self.. I needed a little help with meds but now I don't take anything! It does take a strong mind and will power but also having help around you is key!

I was also in a very bad place my family tried to get me to take meds luckily my doctor said I'm too strong minded I just need time to heal and sleep properly .. I was in a very bad place 6-7 years ago I'll never let myself be like that again .. I don't accept these thoughts or feelings.. I started kick boxing which was a great help .. you can sit and feel sorry and accept the negativity and fall in a hole or you can say fuck you watch this and push on "

You know what, you are clearly an expert. The rest of us just need to be "strong minded" and stop feeling sorry for ourselves.

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By *ig rig hullMan  over a year ago

Hull


".. mind set and mental health is the one thing we have control over in this world ..

Not for everyone, sadly.

If we had control over it there wouldn't be as many suicides from people with depression

I knew when I commented No one else would understand .. once you accept something it takes control of you .. parents doctors label you medicate you your fucked .. I accept people can feel depressed. I refuse to accept it's an illness

Then you need educating a little bro! Coming from experience I know I wasn't myself when I was ill

No I don't need educating .. other people need educating on how the brain works .. it's a powerful thing.. your attitude is implying if you have depression you can't get out of it .. I'm saying you can if you set your mind to it.. your not born depressed it's normally a traumatic event .. and you can get past that

Of course you can recover from depression! I'm back to my normal self.. I needed a little help with meds but now I don't take anything! It does take a strong mind and will power but also having help around you is key!

I was also in a very bad place my family tried to get me to take meds luckily my doctor said I'm too strong minded I just need time to heal and sleep properly .. I was in a very bad place 6-7 years ago I'll never let myself be like that again .. I don't accept these thoughts or feelings.. I started kick boxing which was a great help .. you can sit and feel sorry and accept the negativity and fall in a hole or you can say fuck you watch this and push on "

Not everyone is as strong minded as you say you are. All I'm saying is some people need help to recover from mental illness!

To everyone and anyone here! My inbox is always open if you need a chat! I will always reply if your subject is HELP

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I haven’t been well for a long time but life says u have to keep going

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By *ames-77Man  over a year ago

milton keynes


".. mind set and mental health is the one thing we have control over in this world ..

Not for everyone, sadly.

If we had control over it there wouldn't be as many suicides from people with depression

I knew when I commented No one else would understand .. once you accept something it takes control of you .. parents doctors label you medicate you your fucked .. I accept people can feel depressed. I refuse to accept it's an illness

Then you need educating a little bro! Coming from experience I know I wasn't myself when I was ill

No I don't need educating .. other people need educating on how the brain works .. it's a powerful thing.. your attitude is implying if you have depression you can't get out of it .. I'm saying you can if you set your mind to it.. your not born depressed it's normally a traumatic event .. and you can get past that

Of course you can recover from depression! I'm back to my normal self.. I needed a little help with meds but now I don't take anything! It does take a strong mind and will power but also having help around you is key!

I was also in a very bad place my family tried to get me to take meds luckily my doctor said I'm too strong minded I just need time to heal and sleep properly .. I was in a very bad place 6-7 years ago I'll never let myself be like that again .. I don't accept these thoughts or feelings.. I started kick boxing which was a great help .. you can sit and feel sorry and accept the negativity and fall in a hole or you can say fuck you watch this and push on

Not everyone is as strong minded as you say you are. All I'm saying is some people need help to recover from mental illness!

To everyone and anyone here! My inbox is always open if you need a chat! I will always reply if your subject is HELP"

I hear you bro

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I haven’t been well for a long time but life says u have to keep going "

You dont have yo do it alone x

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By *ig rig hullMan  over a year ago

Hull


"I haven’t been well for a long time but life says u have to keep going

You dont have yo do it alone x"

Touché

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By *ames-77Man  over a year ago

milton keynes


"I haven’t been well for a long time but life says u have to keep going "

You do have to keep going mate FairPlay for acknowledging that !! Keep up that mentality never surrender

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By *ig rig hullMan  over a year ago

Hull

Night all!

Remember #itsoktotalk

#andysmanclub

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By *ust JuicyWoman  over a year ago

east london


" I was told that when I had severe post natal depression, it was actually vitamin deficiency, but they didn't bother to do blood tests.

PND IS real - very real - my first wife went though it and it was awful for her and I do sympathise.

Eventually it went away without any obvious reason so there is hope, but it took a while and a lot of support.

so some is real not made up by the press etc "

I think you may find that he is agreeing with one persons post and being dismissive with everyone elses ….. I wonder if there could be a reason ?

But back to the OP question - not too good but I’m aware of the black dog and keeping my eye on him

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


" I was told that when I had severe post natal depression, it was actually vitamin deficiency, but they didn't bother to do blood tests.

PND IS real - very real - my first wife went though it and it was awful for her and I do sympathise.

Eventually it went away without any obvious reason so there is hope, but it took a while and a lot of support.

so some is real not made up by the press etc

I think you may find that he is agreeing with one persons post and being dismissive with everyone elses ….. I wonder if there could be a reason ?

But back to the OP question - not too good but I’m aware of the black dog and keeping my eye on him "

Aware is good.

With a bit if luck he'll get bored and piss off

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By *ames-77Man  over a year ago

milton keynes


" I was told that when I had severe post natal depression, it was actually vitamin deficiency, but they didn't bother to do blood tests.

PND IS real - very real - my first wife went though it and it was awful for her and I do sympathise.

Eventually it went away without any obvious reason so there is hope, but it took a while and a lot of support.

so some is real not made up by the press etc

I think you may find that he is agreeing with one persons post and being dismissive with everyone elses ….. I wonder if there could be a reason ?

But back to the OP question - not too good but I’m aware of the black dog and keeping my eye on him

Aware is good.

With a bit if luck he'll get bored and piss off"

Who?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


" I was told that when I had severe post natal depression, it was actually vitamin deficiency, but they didn't bother to do blood tests.

PND IS real - very real - my first wife went though it and it was awful for her and I do sympathise.

Eventually it went away without any obvious reason so there is hope, but it took a while and a lot of support.

so some is real not made up by the press etc

I think you may find that he is agreeing with one persons post and being dismissive with everyone elses ….. I wonder if there could be a reason ?

But back to the OP question - not too good but I’m aware of the black dog and keeping my eye on him

Aware is good.

With a bit if luck he'll get bored and piss off

Who?"

The black dog

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By *orphia2003Woman  over a year ago

Tonypandy.

Good to see you back OP. We have missed you.

I'm doing pretty good. I have decided that 'chaotic' is my default setting, and that is OK. I'm not going to apologise for or beat myself up over that any more.

I am going to have highs and crashing lows and I will do what I can to deal with them.

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By *ustamanMan  over a year ago

weymouth

Just tired, feel like I could sleep for a week - otherwise ok I think.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I’m bothered by a few posts in this thread.

Firstly, if you’re of the mindset that mental health is a recent phenomenon that is made up by attention seekers and people need to grow some balls and get over it then it’s probably best your opinions are kept within your own head.

Secondly, there is no ‘one size fits all’ cure for mental health issues, more a spectrum of different things that will help some but not others and vice versa.

Thirdly, it is almost impossible to explain your mental health problems in a post on the internet and I would strongly advise anyone who isn’t feeling right to go and see their gp or contact one of the many helplines out there.

Fourthly, there should be no shame in asking for help and anyone who does make that step should be applauded for taking back control of their own life and headspace.

Fifthly, there are so many different types of talking therapies out there that even if one or another doesn’t work for you personally, keep going until you find one that works.

Sixthly, every one of us random strangers on a sex site that have said ‘my inbox is always open for those who need help’ does mean it and would much prefer to listen and offer advice than to find out you’ve made a permanent decision that can’t be undone.

Finally, we all deserve to be here and we all deserve to have a decent quality of life regardless of what our inner demons may tell us

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By *edeWoman  over a year ago

the abyss


"I’m bothered by a few posts in this thread.

Firstly, if you’re of the mindset that mental health is a recent phenomenon that is made up by attention seekers and people need to grow some balls and get over it then it’s probably best your opinions are kept within your own head.

Secondly, there is no ‘one size fits all’ cure for mental health issues, more a spectrum of different things that will help some but not others and vice versa.

Thirdly, it is almost impossible to explain your mental health problems in a post on the internet and I would strongly advise anyone who isn’t feeling right to go and see their gp or contact one of the many helplines out there.

Fourthly, there should be no shame in asking for help and anyone who does make that step should be applauded for taking back control of their own life and headspace.

Fifthly, there are so many different types of talking therapies out there that even if one or another doesn’t work for you personally, keep going until you find one that works.

Sixthly, every one of us random strangers on a sex site that have said ‘my inbox is always open for those who need help’ does mean it and would much prefer to listen and offer advice than to find out you’ve made a permanent decision that can’t be undone.

Finally, we all deserve to be here and we all deserve to have a decent quality of life regardless of what our inner demons may tell us

"

Perfectly written

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By *rHotNottsMan  over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham


"I’m bothered by a few posts in this thread.

Firstly, if you’re of the mindset that mental health is a recent phenomenon that is made up by attention seekers and people need to grow some balls and get over it then it’s probably best your opinions are kept within your own head.

Secondly, there is no ‘one size fits all’ cure for mental health issues, more a spectrum of different things that will help some but not others and vice versa.

Thirdly, it is almost impossible to explain your mental health problems in a post on the internet and I would strongly advise anyone who isn’t feeling right to go and see their gp or contact one of the many helplines out there.

Fourthly, there should be no shame in asking for help and anyone who does make that step should be applauded for taking back control of their own life and headspace.

Fifthly, there are so many different types of talking therapies out there that even if one or another doesn’t work for you personally, keep going until you find one that works.

Sixthly, every one of us random strangers on a sex site that have said ‘my inbox is always open for those who need help’ does mean it and would much prefer to listen and offer advice than to find out you’ve made a permanent decision that can’t be undone.

Finally, we all deserve to be here and we all deserve to have a decent quality of life regardless of what our inner demons may tell us

"

Your right on every point.

I don’t think people can really understand until they have suffered or seem someone they are close to suffer. When you’ve spent a few nights in A&E, when you’ve found the hidden blades, seen the scars, watched someone slipping away you do understand, I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.

It’s not for everyone , it’s more useful for healthy people like me actually to maintain mental well-being , if you are Ill you need actual help not books, but the Somatic Toolbox, 125 Worksheets , it’s an invaluable tool.

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By *ohn KanakaMan  over a year ago

Not all that North of North London


"I’m bothered by a few posts in this thread.

Firstly, if you’re of the mindset that mental health is a recent phenomenon that is made up by attention seekers and people need to grow some balls and get over it then it’s probably best your opinions are kept within your own head.

Secondly, there is no ‘one size fits all’ cure for mental health issues, more a spectrum of different things that will help some but not others and vice versa.

Thirdly, it is almost impossible to explain your mental health problems in a post on the internet and I would strongly advise anyone who isn’t feeling right to go and see their gp or contact one of the many helplines out there.

Fourthly, there should be no shame in asking for help and anyone who does make that step should be applauded for taking back control of their own life and headspace.

Fifthly, there are so many different types of talking therapies out there that even if one or another doesn’t work for you personally, keep going until you find one that works.

Sixthly, every one of us random strangers on a sex site that have said ‘my inbox is always open for those who need help’ does mean it and would much prefer to listen and offer advice than to find out you’ve made a permanent decision that can’t be undone.

Finally, we all deserve to be here and we all deserve to have a decent quality of life regardless of what our inner demons may tell us

"

This. So much this.

While, of course, a thread about mental health should include positives as well as people struggling, I've always considered this type of thread a supportive and emphatic space. No one is looking for a diagnosis or medical help just a few words of support. Because sometimes that is all we need. Even when that support is coming from strangers on a swinging site.

And to me, these threads have been about reducing the stigma around mental health, because that is the one thing that sharing and being open does.

It's saddened me to see some of the responses that seem to pander to the worst negative stereotypes of mental health abd that 'manning up' is all we need

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By *eliWoman  over a year ago

.

So I posted in a mental health thread a few weeks ago.

And I'm back. Being open because I think it can affect anyone.

I've struggled a bit lately - a health worry has meant I've cried more than usual. Had sleepless nights. I find that I'm more obviously ND atm, like I don't have the energy to mask it?

But with all that being said, it's also given me more of a desire to live. I'm going to avoid reckless behaviour, an old pasttime of mine for coping.

I'm very lucky to have the wonderful people I do in my life. It doesn't fix things but that chance to talk, about anything and everything really means a lot. And the country rendition videos I'm being sent of my favourite rap songs.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I’ve taken to working on me and me alone, in the gym, right food every day and I am slowly coming round to the notion that I have got this, the world will fall apart around me as long as I am better than I was yesterday, also found my depeche mode cd down the back of the sofa

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Taking breaks from the tinterweb and getting some fresh air is a good habit to get into. Won’t cure everything but helps in its own small way.

As said above, healthy diet and exercise are also good habits to get into to improve your head

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By *nthonyCleopatraCouple  over a year ago

sittingbourne

Mr's head is always a dark hole battling demons, learnt to live with it and keep them hidden away. They come out to play when needed but its not nice

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By *rtyIan OP   Man  over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons

The weekend is here hope you all have the best you can x

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By *r TriomanMan  over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

Physically, I'm a bit run down as I've caught a bug (not COVID - I've checked) so I've not cycled or run for a week, mentally, I'm in a great place, happy, content and fulfilled (except for cycling and running that is - eating chocolate instead which, when a tad ill can be equally fulfilling).

For those who are not in such a great place, I'm happy to chat or be a shoulder to lean on.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Not too bad

Despite bus strikes managed to get out most days (yes I know its not a long walk but many days can't be bothered)

Then a random thought about a belt and plastic bag reminded me how fragile things can be

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Just stumbled across this thread and glad I did!

Been a really really rough 2 months, lost my best mate to suicide and have huge guilt feelings over it. Made a connection with someone new, that ended! Fell off the rails big time after, Far to much drink, punished myself hugely in the gym, got a head injury at rugby and then caught covid! So all in all pretty rough! Black dog was present and persistent!!

Hopefully getting back on track now and starting to look forward to things again.

Hope everyone else is doing good and looking forward to the weekend

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By *ames-77Man  over a year ago

milton keynes

I do agree for sure it's good to talk and discuss rather than be silent and struggle .. I strongly disagree with pharma meds they do not fix anything long term .. they trick your brain into feeling temporarily ok until they ware off it's a viscous circle you just become dependent on them .. this is where people get annoyed and don't understand what I mean .. I understand we all go through shit in life but life is always going to be difficult .. my personal experience with feeling depressed was due to an event that happened in my life I didn't grow up being depressed.. I self loathed for a while and couldn't sleep and I couldn't stop thinking about the thing that happened.. but I realised the more I accepted it the longer it went on so I started kick boxing which helped a lot I strongly stand by "strong body strong mind" one day at a time.. time is a healer.. but i encourage to be strong we have control over our mind set even if it feels like we don't .. we do

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Tbh mine has been really bad for the last few weeks I'm not sleeping properly so much going through my head

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By *eorge1949Man  over a year ago

BroadwayWR11


"

It's saddened me to see some of the responses that seem to pander to the worst negative stereotypes of mental health abd that 'manning up' is all we need

"

Do you really believe that your private message, followed by blocking to prevent a reply, is in any way constructive - but if it's helpful to you then that is OK I guess.

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By *inkyInkedBiWoman  over a year ago

.

Christ some views basically saying you can ‘think’ yourself better.

It’s not a choice to be depressed - is it a choice to have heart disease? Would you take medication if needed for heart disease?

Why would you refuse it for mental health if it helps?

I know it’s not for everyone and to some degree doctors are too quick to give it out - but I would not be here today if I wasn’t on medication. Period.

Been a rubbish few weeks but I’m good at painting the smile on

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By *orphia2003Woman  over a year ago

Tonypandy.

Had a massive panic attack today whilst on driving lesson. Now got it into my head I'll never be able to drive.

Getting very pissed off with my brain.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Had a massive panic attack today whilst on driving lesson. Now got it into my head I'll never be able to drive.

Getting very pissed off with my brain."

There’s a very good book called At Last A Life by Paul David that I found very helpful when I used to have panic attacks. The main takeaway is that accepting the panic attack and allowing it to happen takes the power away from it and it goes away a lot quicker. Deffo worth getting a copy off Amazon

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Good morning lounge dwellers, weekly check in to see how we are all feeling.

Mine was up and down last week but I had a good weekend and I have decided to take a break from the booze, I been kicking the arse out of it lately and I know it only temporarily masks the issue, but the reality is it just compounds the issue. So new week new opportunities, weather permitting I shall be back in the river this week for my cold water stuff, being among nature in my happy space.

Hope you are all as well as can be and remember ITS OK TO NOT BE OK

My ears always here

Take care and have a great week

Much love to you all xx "

Mine has been awful this week.

Dad in hospital all week, best mates funeral, and a few other bits to worry about too. But getting better

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Good morning lounge dwellers, weekly check in to see how we are all feeling.

Mine was up and down last week but I had a good weekend and I have decided to take a break from the booze, I been kicking the arse out of it lately and I know it only temporarily masks the issue, but the reality is it just compounds the issue. So new week new opportunities, weather permitting I shall be back in the river this week for my cold water stuff, being among nature in my happy space.

Hope you are all as well as can be and remember ITS OK TO NOT BE OK

My ears always here

Take care and have a great week

Much love to you all xx

Mine has been awful this week.

Dad in hospital all week, best mates funeral, and a few other bits to worry about too. But getting better

"

One day at a time fella, it gets better

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Good morning lounge dwellers, weekly check in to see how we are all feeling.

Mine was up and down last week but I had a good weekend and I have decided to take a break from the booze, I been kicking the arse out of it lately and I know it only temporarily masks the issue, but the reality is it just compounds the issue. So new week new opportunities, weather permitting I shall be back in the river this week for my cold water stuff, being among nature in my happy space.

Hope you are all as well as can be and remember ITS OK TO NOT BE OK

My ears always here

Take care and have a great week

Much love to you all xx

Mine has been awful this week.

Dad in hospital all week, best mates funeral, and a few other bits to worry about too. But getting better

One day at a time fella, it gets better "

Thank you!

It does and have been working on it over the last year or so but just has just been a particularly tough week.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Finally back at work after 6 months of after someone tried to commit suicide using a mode of transport I was driving.

Work were great and have a comprehensive trauma support for such incidents.

However what I hadn't bargained for was the amount of unrelated trauma the incident dredged up so I have spent the last months facing a lot of childhood trauma which has been pretty hard to acknowledge and admit and also link them to who I am today.

In a better place than I was but today was pretty rough for no apparent reason.

TOMORROW WILL BE BETTER

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Generally in the toilet mental health wise , there is always tomorrow, but the fucking toilet is still there !

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By *4bimMan  over a year ago

Farnborough Hampshire

Was bad for a while but that was my fault.

Working, running a business and then financially helping a friend with there's took it out of me. Was getting little or no sleep until things settled down.

Sometimes it's difficult to stop when you have too

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By *hrek101Man  over a year ago

Herts

So many men on this

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

So so. I've run out of meds AGAIN thanks to the stupid doctors surgery not putting my order in. No doubt I'll have another "episode" at some point

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I’ve never really considered that question until now. I guess it’s the same as it’s always been.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So many men on this "

Has always been harder for men to be heard and treated for mental health issues in society. So not surprised more men on here than women.

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By *urve_your_enthusiasmWoman  over a year ago

Manchester

Not so good today. Reached breaking point.

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By *rtyIan OP   Man  over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons


"So many men on this

Has always been harder for men to be heard and treated for mental health issues in society. So not surprised more men on here than women. "

Not that its harder its just men find it harder to talk and bottle things up

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm finding more inner peace and letting go of anger/ frustration recently. The example being my dad being not the best Dad and I've kept him at arms length for sometime. He's old now and unwell, its not forgiveness but acceptance from my part and it feels better, inhale hate, exhale love I guess. My mental health is pretty good, hope you are doing ok OP.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Pretty sound thankfully.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

As the kids say these days, not far off a full on menty b. So drinking at home alone tonight to forget my worries for a few hours. To anyone else struggling, try and stay strong.

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By *arleybird66Man  over a year ago

wexford


"As the kids say these days, not far off a full on menty b. So drinking at home alone tonight to forget my worries for a few hours. To anyone else struggling, try and stay strong. "

yea same drinking at home alone it can be a bitch trying to stay strong especially when others dont no the story of ur past and having an ex belittle ya

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By *ove2pleaseseukMan  over a year ago

Hastings


"As the kids say these days, not far off a full on menty b. So drinking at home alone tonight to forget my worries for a few hours. To anyone else struggling, try and stay strong.

yea same drinking at home alone it can be a bitch trying to stay strong especially when others dont no the story of ur past and having an ex belittle ya "

Going out is so expensive and as you get older it's like the sad old guy on his own in the corner don't know what is worse.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I’ll be suprised if I see 2024. Always struggled with my mental health, but getting worse and worse, despite pleading for help to drs etc just getting passed

Around like pass the parcel

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By *arleybird66Man  over a year ago

wexford


"As the kids say these days, not far off a full on menty b. So drinking at home alone tonight to forget my worries for a few hours. To anyone else struggling, try and stay strong.

yea same drinking at home alone it can be a bitch trying to stay strong especially when others dont no the story of ur past and having an ex belittle ya

Going out is so expensive and as you get older it's like the sad old guy on his own in the corner don't know what is worse. "

so true price of drink is stupid and drinking alone aint fun and being in company for buying rounds is too expensive a no win situation

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By *.D.I.D.A.SMan  over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact

My mum passed away on Xmas day losing her battle to cancer. Her final moments were quite traumatic for both of us. And whilst I feel I am dealing with her actual passing in a manageable manner, I now feel that I am struggling with filling the void. I've been on a couple of unsuccessful Tinder dates since which, although came with no expectations, being ghosted by both has knocked my confidence somewhat. I feel irritable around people familiar to me and sought refuge in the company of strangers and I guess it was refreshing to get to know people unfamiliar with my situation as a distraction. Being on Fab seemed to exasperate the feeling of alienation so I limited my use of it as much as possible. I'm loathe to admit it to anyone as it comes with stigma, but I actually feel lonely. And of course it can easily come across as being needy if carelessly conveyed which is not attractive so I kinda find it hard to know how to act right now even though I find myself mostly alone these days.

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By *arleybird66Man  over a year ago

wexford

and people wonder why others go through bad times ive just had a very abusive message from a male cause i turned him down he wanted me then when i said sorry im busy called me fat ugly and no one would fuck me and yea i no im fat and ugly at least to the him that had no pic mine is true to me

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By *arcteggMan  over a year ago

grays

I have BPD ( borderline personality disorder)

Luckily this can be helped by heavy going therapy, group and one on one sessions .we use ( currently) MBT metallisation based therapy .

I’ve done group sessions before , but this is my second one and I started 3 weeks ago

What I’m finding is how deep my ‘shyness’ is I struggle to speak go bright red and feel hot and sweaty .. and feel completely crushed .

But … I won’t give up ! As much as I want to run away from this .luckily I’m discovering just how deep this ,inability to connect with others, goes how long and what I’ve lost due to it .

I’ve managed to become a hermit type character by pushing people away or avoiding social interactions. What I know is that you have to become very ‘uncomfortable’ with the process of rebuilding but I’m finding it so bloody hard .

First time I’ve seen this thread -it feels good to write down how I feel even if it only makes sense to me …

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Finally back at work after 6 months of after someone tried to commit suicide using a mode of transport I was driving.

Work were great and have a comprehensive trauma support for such incidents.

However what I hadn't bargained for was the amount of unrelated trauma the incident dredged up so I have spent the last months facing a lot of childhood trauma which has been pretty hard to acknowledge and admit and also link them to who I am today.

In a better place than I was but today was pretty rough for no apparent reason.

TOMORROW WILL BE BETTER "

While that is a shit situation to be in right now, in the long run you’ll be a lot better than you were before without even realising it. The trauma support you’ve got is obviously working as it’s helping you deal with everything not just the incident. Keep going, there’s always bad days but they don’t mean the good days have stopped

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Generally in the toilet mental health wise , there is always tomorrow, but the fucking toilet is still there ! "

The toilet will always be there. Eventually it’ll be so insignificant you won’t even notice it. Have you been to see your gp? You got this

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Was bad for a while but that was my fault.

Working, running a business and then financially helping a friend with there's took it out of me. Was getting little or no sleep until things settled down.

Sometimes it's difficult to stop when you have too"

Time to put yourself first. You’re the most important person in your life and that needs to be your focus above everything else

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So so. I've run out of meds AGAIN thanks to the stupid doctors surgery not putting my order in. No doubt I'll have another "episode" at some point "

Have you used the nhs app? You can link it to your drs so every month you just log on and order from it, goes straight to your pharmacy. Also the pharmacy is allowed to give you an emergency short term prescription if it’s on repeat, even if it’s only a few days worth to get you through

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I’ve never really considered that question until now. I guess it’s the same as it’s always been. "

And what is that? Are you happy with it or does it need some work?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So many men on this

Has always been harder for men to be heard and treated for mental health issues in society. So not surprised more men on here than women. "

let’s change this

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Not so good today. Reached breaking point. "

Can we help? Even if it’s just listening!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm finding more inner peace and letting go of anger/ frustration recently. The example being my dad being not the best Dad and I've kept him at arms length for sometime. He's old now and unwell, its not forgiveness but acceptance from my part and it feels better, inhale hate, exhale love I guess. My mental health is pretty good, hope you are doing ok OP. "

Acceptance is enough and credit to you for managing it!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Pretty sound thankfully."

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"As the kids say these days, not far off a full on menty b. So drinking at home alone tonight to forget my worries for a few hours. To anyone else struggling, try and stay strong. "

Drinking alone is not the answer, you know this. Get a notebook and start scribbling down everything that comes to mind, whether it makes sense or not then you can start seeing the problems a bit more clearly and working out if they’re within your control or not

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"As the kids say these days, not far off a full on menty b. So drinking at home alone tonight to forget my worries for a few hours. To anyone else struggling, try and stay strong.

yea same drinking at home alone it can be a bitch trying to stay strong especially when others dont no the story of ur past and having an ex belittle ya

Going out is so expensive and as you get older it's like the sad old guy on his own in the corner don't know what is worse. "

Do you need to go drinking? Can you go out and try other things to meet people?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I’ll be suprised if I see 2024. Always struggled with my mental health, but getting worse and worse, despite pleading for help to drs etc just getting passed

Around like pass the parcel "

Keep going back. Try a different gp. Try the phone helplines. Ask for the mental health crisis team in your area

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"and people wonder why others go through bad times ive just had a very abusive message from a male cause i turned him down he wanted me then when i said sorry im busy called me fat ugly and no one would fuck me and yea i no im fat and ugly at least to the him that had no pic mine is true to me "

Other peoples opinions and actions are a reflection of them, not you. Don’t take things to heart from rude people on the internet, they don’t know you and you do

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West


"My mum passed away on Xmas day losing her battle to cancer. Her final moments were quite traumatic for both of us. And whilst I feel I am dealing with her actual passing in a manageable manner, I now feel that I am struggling with filling the void. I've been on a couple of unsuccessful Tinder dates since which, although came with no expectations, being ghosted by both has knocked my confidence somewhat. I feel irritable around people familiar to me and sought refuge in the company of strangers and I guess it was refreshing to get to know people unfamiliar with my situation as a distraction. Being on Fab seemed to exasperate the feeling of alienation so I limited my use of it as much as possible. I'm loathe to admit it to anyone as it comes with stigma, but I actually feel lonely. And of course it can easily come across as being needy if carelessly conveyed which is not attractive so I kinda find it hard to know how to act right now even though I find myself mostly alone these days.

"

I'm so sorry to hear about your mum. I remember you posting about you starting to care for her at about the same time my Grandad died. Lots of people on here are happy to listen but don't suffer alone. There are lots of charity type places offering support, like Andy's Man Club, and your GP can refer for grief counselling. We have a Bereavement Café session that happens monthly, near us, and you just turn up. Sending you all the best

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West


"I have BPD ( borderline personality disorder)

Luckily this can be helped by heavy going therapy, group and one on one sessions .we use ( currently) MBT metallisation based therapy .

I’ve done group sessions before , but this is my second one and I started 3 weeks ago

What I’m finding is how deep my ‘shyness’ is I struggle to speak go bright red and feel hot and sweaty .. and feel completely crushed .

But … I won’t give up ! As much as I want to run away from this .luckily I’m discovering just how deep this ,inability to connect with others, goes how long and what I’ve lost due to it .

I’ve managed to become a hermit type character by pushing people away or avoiding social interactions. What I know is that you have to become very ‘uncomfortable’ with the process of rebuilding but I’m finding it so bloody hard .

First time I’ve seen this thread -it feels good to write down how I feel even if it only makes sense to me …

"

Well done for writing it down, keep using these threads for that purpose, if it helps you. And best wishes for your therapy sessions, I hope they are helpful and you are able to continue to benefit from them.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"My mum passed away on Xmas day losing her battle to cancer. Her final moments were quite traumatic for both of us. And whilst I feel I am dealing with her actual passing in a manageable manner, I now feel that I am struggling with filling the void. I've been on a couple of unsuccessful Tinder dates since which, although came with no expectations, being ghosted by both has knocked my confidence somewhat. I feel irritable around people familiar to me and sought refuge in the company of strangers and I guess it was refreshing to get to know people unfamiliar with my situation as a distraction. Being on Fab seemed to exasperate the feeling of alienation so I limited my use of it as much as possible. I'm loathe to admit it to anyone as it comes with stigma, but I actually feel lonely. And of course it can easily come across as being needy if carelessly conveyed which is not attractive so I kinda find it hard to know how to act right now even though I find myself mostly alone these days.

"

I’m sorry to hear about your mum.

You seem really self aware which is great. Give yourself time to recover and don’t try to run before you can walk. Sometimes sitting with the down feelings can be helpful to your recovery and when the good ones come, embrace them

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I have BPD ( borderline personality disorder)

Luckily this can be helped by heavy going therapy, group and one on one sessions .we use ( currently) MBT metallisation based therapy .

I’ve done group sessions before , but this is my second one and I started 3 weeks ago

What I’m finding is how deep my ‘shyness’ is I struggle to speak go bright red and feel hot and sweaty .. and feel completely crushed .

But … I won’t give up ! As much as I want to run away from this .luckily I’m discovering just how deep this ,inability to connect with others, goes how long and what I’ve lost due to it .

I’ve managed to become a hermit type character by pushing people away or avoiding social interactions. What I know is that you have to become very ‘uncomfortable’ with the process of rebuilding but I’m finding it so bloody hard .

First time I’ve seen this thread -it feels good to write down how I feel even if it only makes sense to me …

"

Well done! The hardest step is always the first step. Once you’ve identified the problems and where they came from you can start fixing them and it sounds like you’re definitely on the right path

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm OK. I've definitely been better but I'm OK.

Once I've got some personal paperwork bits out of the way and the next couple of weeks at work have passed I'll feel much better

F

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm OK. I've definitely been better but I'm OK.

Once I've got some personal paperwork bits out of the way and the next couple of weeks at work have passed I'll feel much better

F"

Always good to have a plan

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By *unfunfun xMan  over a year ago

LONDON

Awwwwww chicken good for you being there for people, it's so easy to turn your back and concentrate on dik pics excuse poor humour but it's true, but what you're doing is great. just sometimes one message is enough so huge respect from me too

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Awwwwww chicken good for you being there for people, it's so easy to turn your back and concentrate on dik pics excuse poor humour but it's true, but what you're doing is great. just sometimes one message is enough so huge respect from me too "

Thank you so much always here if anyone needs anything, tbh dick pics get boring after you’ve seen the first eleventy million

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By *unfunfun xMan  over a year ago

LONDON

I think some will read the "I'm always here if someone needs anything" the wrong way I've been on this site short time think 2months now maybe? And you get to see the gems on here and there are a few I think you are one for sure

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By *uzzy-LogicMan  over a year ago

Fochabers

Well I produce around 90% less serotonin than an average person, for that surprisingly ok

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By *.D.I.D.A.SMan  over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact


"

I'm so sorry to hear about your mum. I remember you posting about you starting to care for her at about the same time my Grandad died. Lots of people on here are happy to listen but don't suffer alone. There are lots of charity type places offering support, like Andy's Man Club, and your GP can refer for grief counselling. We have a Bereavement Café session that happens monthly, near us, and you just turn up. Sending you all the best "

Ah wow... I posted that NYE 2020. I'm really amazed anybody would remember. Really amazing.

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By *.D.I.D.A.SMan  over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact


"

I’m sorry to hear about your mum.

You seem really self aware which is great. Give yourself time to recover and don’t try to run before you can walk. Sometimes sitting with the down feelings can be helpful to your recovery and when the good ones come, embrace them "

I feel I've mourned and grieved her passing already. But now I'm left with a void and unable to connect with anyone which isn't problematic in itself right now and it has 'only' been 3 months. But 3 months could easily turn into half a year and then a year. It just feels depressingly lonely! I don't want sympathy which is what my friends and family would offer. I just want to feel different to what I have. Is this still part of grieving/bereavement?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

I’m sorry to hear about your mum.

You seem really self aware which is great. Give yourself time to recover and don’t try to run before you can walk. Sometimes sitting with the down feelings can be helpful to your recovery and when the good ones come, embrace them I feel I've mourned and grieved her passing already. But now I'm left with a void and unable to connect with anyone which isn't problematic in itself right now and it has 'only' been 3 months. But 3 months could easily turn into half a year and then a year. It just feels depressingly lonely! I don't want sympathy which is what my friends and family would offer. I just want to feel different to what I have. Is this still part of grieving/bereavement? "

Absolutely it is. Grieving looks different for each person, and wanting to feel different is a sign that you’re moving in the right direction. If you’re still feeling the same in six months or a year and you feel stuck then it would be helpful to seek some sort of talking therapy to get things moving again

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So so. I've run out of meds AGAIN thanks to the stupid doctors surgery not putting my order in. No doubt I'll have another "episode" at some point

Have you used the nhs app? You can link it to your drs so every month you just log on and order from it, goes straight to your pharmacy. Also the pharmacy is allowed to give you an emergency short term prescription if it’s on repeat, even if it’s only a few days worth to get you through "

I wasn't aware of this. Thanks. I'll check that out x

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By *ife NinjaMan  over a year ago

Dunfermline

Patchy last week. Better this week

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So so. I've run out of meds AGAIN thanks to the stupid doctors surgery not putting my order in. No doubt I'll have another "episode" at some point

Have you used the nhs app? You can link it to your drs so every month you just log on and order from it, goes straight to your pharmacy. Also the pharmacy is allowed to give you an emergency short term prescription if it’s on repeat, even if it’s only a few days worth to get you through

I wasn't aware of this. Thanks. I'll check that out x"

It’s got me out of a pickle twice now

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West


"

I'm so sorry to hear about your mum. I remember you posting about you starting to care for her at about the same time my Grandad died. Lots of people on here are happy to listen but don't suffer alone. There are lots of charity type places offering support, like Andy's Man Club, and your GP can refer for grief counselling. We have a Bereavement Café session that happens monthly, near us, and you just turn up. Sending you all the best

Ah wow... I posted that NYE 2020. I'm really amazed anybody would remember. Really amazing. "

Grandad died on 24 Jan 2021, so yeah, similar kind of time. Elephants never forget

Keep on keeping on. You'll get there, you will.

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