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Femmes - honest messages for dudes
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OK femmes of fab. As we hear a lot that men just want honest responses to their messages that they write with effort, I've decided to give myself a challenge.
For one hour I Will honestly respond to messages in my inbox. Truly honest about how that messages makes me feel and if I wouldn't normally respond, why.
Any I receive in that hour, and if I have time any others from the weeks prior I can get to in the time frame.
Anyone else want in? Let's see how they respond to honesty when that's what people say they want. I'm fascinated... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"‘Fuck off then you ugly slag you’re not ugly even attractive’ x10 is my prediction.
Rejection doesn’t look good on many people  "
Wow, that is horrendous - sorry men respond like that.
Now, honest question, cos I can't DM you, on your profile is it really only "£5 to spend" or should that be £50 or £15, or £25....
Just with £5 I think I will be asking for a bank loan or using my credit card!
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"OK femmes of fab. As we hear a lot that men just want honest responses to their messages that they write with effort, I've decided to give myself a challenge.
For one hour I Will honestly respond to messages in my inbox. Truly honest about how that messages makes me feel and if I wouldn't normally respond, why.
Any I receive in that hour, and if I have time any others from the weeks prior I can get to in the time frame.
Anyone else want in? Let's see how they respond to honesty when that's what people say they want. I'm fascinated..."
Very patronising.
Like men need teaching etc.
Think you will get pretty generic messages.
It isn't the message it's attraction.
Mark Twain could write it and it wouldn't mean shit if you looked like Quasimodo |
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"OK femmes of fab. As we hear a lot that men just want honest responses to their messages that they write with effort, I've decided to give myself a challenge.
For one hour I Will honestly respond to messages in my inbox. Truly honest about how that messages makes me feel and if I wouldn't normally respond, why.
Any I receive in that hour, and if I have time any others from the weeks prior I can get to in the time frame.
Anyone else want in? Let's see how they respond to honesty when that's what people say they want. I'm fascinated... Very patronising.
Like men need teaching etc.
Think you will get pretty generic messages.
It isn't the message it's attraction.
Mark Twain could write it and it wouldn't mean shit if you looked like Quasimodo "
Tell me you don't understand that attraction for a majority of femmes comes from psychological attraction without telling me. |
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"OK femmes of fab. As we hear a lot that men just want honest responses to their messages that they write with effort, I've decided to give myself a challenge.
For one hour I Will honestly respond to messages in my inbox. Truly honest about how that messages makes me feel and if I wouldn't normally respond, why.
Any I receive in that hour, and if I have time any others from the weeks prior I can get to in the time frame.
Anyone else want in? Let's see how they respond to honesty when that's what people say they want. I'm fascinated...
Very patronising.
"
Ha! Oh the irony. It’s lost on some. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"OK femmes of fab. As we hear a lot that men just want honest responses to their messages that they write with effort, I've decided to give myself a challenge.
For one hour I Will honestly respond to messages in my inbox. Truly honest about how that messages makes me feel and if I wouldn't normally respond, why.
Any I receive in that hour, and if I have time any others from the weeks prior I can get to in the time frame.
Anyone else want in? Let's see how they respond to honesty when that's what people say they want. I'm fascinated... Very patronising.
Like men need teaching etc.
Think you will get pretty generic messages.
It isn't the message it's attraction.
Mark Twain could write it and it wouldn't mean shit if you looked like Quasimodo "
You see the majority of messages I get from men, yes teaching would be beneficial.
You are right when you say that attraction is important. Communication is part of that attraction. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It isn't the message it's attraction.
Mark Twain could write it and it wouldn't mean shit if you looked like Quasimodo "
Why Mark Twain - not convinced that many would find his writing that alluring that they would want to jump in to bed with him - plus have you seen his photos? I'd take my chances with Quasimodo.
BTW, are you able to reply to posts in a more positive fashion, or do you always like to appear rude and entitled? (asking for a friend) |
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"OK femmes of fab. As we hear a lot that men just want honest responses to their messages that they write with effort, I've decided to give myself a challenge.
For one hour I Will honestly respond to messages in my inbox. Truly honest about how that messages makes me feel and if I wouldn't normally respond, why.
Any I receive in that hour, and if I have time any others from the weeks prior I can get to in the time frame.
Anyone else want in? Let's see how they respond to honesty when that's what people say they want. I'm fascinated... Very patronising.
Like men need teaching etc.
Think you will get pretty generic messages.
It isn't the message it's attraction.
Mark Twain could write it and it wouldn't mean shit if you looked like Quasimodo
Tell me you don't understand that attraction for a majority of femmes comes from psychological attraction without telling me. "
JG I feel obliged to tell you you’re about to get into a pointless and frustrating argument  |
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"OK femmes of fab. As we hear a lot that men just want honest responses to their messages that they write with effort, I've decided to give myself a challenge.
For one hour I Will honestly respond to messages in my inbox. Truly honest about how that messages makes me feel and if I wouldn't normally respond, why.
Any I receive in that hour, and if I have time any others from the weeks prior I can get to in the time frame.
Anyone else want in? Let's see how they respond to honesty when that's what people say they want. I'm fascinated... Very patronising.
Like men need teaching etc.
Think you will get pretty generic messages.
It isn't the message it's attraction.
Mark Twain could write it and it wouldn't mean shit if you looked like Quasimodo "
How are you such an expert on what women want when everything you post gives the impression you have no luck with women? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"OK femmes of fab. As we hear a lot that men just want honest responses to their messages that they write with effort, I've decided to give myself a challenge.
For one hour I Will honestly respond to messages in my inbox. Truly honest about how that messages makes me feel and if I wouldn't normally respond, why.
Any I receive in that hour, and if I have time any others from the weeks prior I can get to in the time frame.
Anyone else want in? Let's see how they respond to honesty when that's what people say they want. I'm fascinated... Very patronising.
Like men need teaching etc.
Think you will get pretty generic messages.
It isn't the message it's attraction.
Mark Twain could write it and it wouldn't mean shit if you looked like Quasimodo
Tell me you don't understand that attraction for a majority of femmes comes from psychological attraction without telling me. "
You're gonna have men wasting more of their time constructing messages with multiple paragraphs and tailoring them to people to still get knocked back.
They are gonna be even more upset then.
Something simple, brief, read their profile.
Test the waters.
It isn't English lessons on here.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"OK femmes of fab. As we hear a lot that men just want honest responses to their messages that they write with effort, I've decided to give myself a challenge.
For one hour I Will honestly respond to messages in my inbox. Truly honest about how that messages makes me feel and if I wouldn't normally respond, why.
Any I receive in that hour, and if I have time any others from the weeks prior I can get to in the time frame.
Anyone else want in? Let's see how they respond to honesty when that's what people say they want. I'm fascinated...
Very patronising.
Ha! Oh the irony. It’s lost on some."
As a man if you participate in doing this kind of thing, you have no respect for yourself. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just a thought. If no one engages with the troll then he may well go elsewhere "
On that note, I shall head off to work, cos I think reading his responses will just piss me off as much as they did yesterday.
Have a good day all and good luck OP with your inbox (hope you get some gorgeous positive messages). |
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"Just a thought. If no one engages with the troll then he may well go elsewhere "
What troll? I see no bright hair. Which is also disappointing gang I want some yellow highlighter shit going on.
Also messages update the vast majority have been read and not replied to which is probably for the best... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just a thought. If no one engages with the troll then he may well go elsewhere
I agree, Chicken, and I promise to stop throwing bread now "
Throw it my way, I’ve not had breakfast yet  |
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"Just a thought. If no one engages with the troll then he may well go elsewhere
What troll? I see no bright hair. Which is also disappointing gang I want some yellow highlighter shit going on.
Also messages update the vast majority have been read and not replied to which is probably for the best..."
I can’t reply to you anyway darling. Your relief is palpable! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just a thought. If no one engages with the troll then he may well go elsewhere
What troll? I see no bright hair. Which is also disappointing gang I want some yellow highlighter shit going on.
Also messages update the vast majority have been read and not replied to which is probably for the best..."
Ah I loved my troll collection |
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If only I wasn’t so old, although at least it saves you the trouble of replying with:
“I’m sorry, although you’re an incredible specimen of a man and a humble and caring beautiful person, I’m afraid you’re outside my age range.”
  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just a thought. If no one engages with the troll then he may well go elsewhere
What troll? I see no bright hair. Which is also disappointing gang I want some yellow highlighter shit going on.
Also messages update the vast majority have been read and not replied to which is probably for the best..."
Probably aghast at getting replies! |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"OK femmes of fab. As we hear a lot that men just want honest responses to their messages that they write with effort, I've decided to give myself a challenge.
For one hour I Will honestly respond to messages in my inbox. Truly honest about how that messages makes me feel and if I wouldn't normally respond, why.
Any I receive in that hour, and if I have time any others from the weeks prior I can get to in the time frame.
Anyone else want in? Let's see how they respond to honesty when that's what people say they want. I'm fascinated... Very patronising.
Like men need teaching etc.
Think you will get pretty generic messages.
It isn't the message it's attraction.
Mark Twain could write it and it wouldn't mean shit if you looked like Quasimodo
Tell me you don't understand that attraction for a majority of femmes comes from psychological attraction without telling me. You're gonna have men wasting more of their time constructing messages with multiple paragraphs and tailoring them to people to still get knocked back.
They are gonna be even more upset then.
Something simple, brief, read their profile.
Test the waters.
It isn't English lessons on here.
"
No but it is lessons on being a decent human being.
The simple lesson is; treat someone like trash or a collection of warm wet holes, see what happens.
Also, the inference that people shouldn’t be putting effort in and using scattergun messages instead is hilarious.
If you’re indiscriminate with where you send your messages so much that it’s a chore to write messages, then it’s no surprise that people don’t want to meet |
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"Just a thought. If no one engages with the troll then he may well go elsewhere
I agree, Chicken, and I promise to stop throwing bread now
Throw it my way, I’ve not had breakfast yet "
Well in that case forget bread! I shall fix you a tray of delicious delights to put a smile on your Monday face |
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"OK femmes of fab. As we hear a lot that men just want honest responses to their messages that they write with effort, I've decided to give myself a challenge.
For one hour I Will honestly respond to messages in my inbox. Truly honest about how that messages makes me feel and if I wouldn't normally respond, why.
Any I receive in that hour, and if I have time any others from the weeks prior I can get to in the time frame.
Anyone else want in? Let's see how they respond to honesty when that's what people say they want. I'm fascinated...
Very patronising.
Ha! Oh the irony. It’s lost on some. As a man if you participate in doing this kind of thing, you have no respect for yourself. "
I'm a very fussy man, with a lot of respect for myself. I'm also going to message the OP and participate in some light-hearted Monday morning fun |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I appreciate all the replies I’ve ever received that have always been nothing but polite.
Carry on as you are femmes, you make it easy for a guy to know who he wants to talk too.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just a thought. If no one engages with the troll then he may well go elsewhere
I agree, Chicken, and I promise to stop throwing bread now
Throw it my way, I’ve not had breakfast yet
Well in that case forget bread! I shall fix you a tray of delicious delights to put a smile on your Monday face "
Ooh you! |
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"If only I wasn’t so old, although at least it saves you the trouble of replying with:
“I’m sorry, although you’re an incredible specimen of a man and a humble and caring beautiful person, I’m afraid you’re outside my age range.”
"
But you might be an exception to the rules |
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"I appreciate all the replies I’ve ever received that have always been nothing but polite.
Carry on as you are femmes, you make it easy for a guy to know who he wants to talk too. "
Its cause you send lovely messages Woody!! You're a good egg x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"OK femmes of fab. As we hear a lot that men just want honest responses to their messages that they write with effort, I've decided to give myself a challenge.
For one hour I Will honestly respond to messages in my inbox. Truly honest about how that messages makes me feel and if I wouldn't normally respond, why.
Any I receive in that hour, and if I have time any others from the weeks prior I can get to in the time frame.
Anyone else want in? Let's see how they respond to honesty when that's what people say they want. I'm fascinated... Very patronising.
Like men need teaching etc.
Think you will get pretty generic messages.
It isn't the message it's attraction.
Mark Twain could write it and it wouldn't mean shit if you looked like Quasimodo
Tell me you don't understand that attraction for a majority of femmes comes from psychological attraction without telling me. You're gonna have men wasting more of their time constructing messages with multiple paragraphs and tailoring them to people to still get knocked back.
They are gonna be even more upset then.
Something simple, brief, read their profile.
Test the waters.
It isn't English lessons on here.
No but it is lessons on being a decent human being.
The simple lesson is; treat someone like trash or a collection of warm wet holes, see what happens.
Also, the inference that people shouldn’t be putting effort in and using scattergun messages instead is hilarious.
If you’re indiscriminate with where you send your messages so much that it’s a chore to write messages, then it’s no surprise that people don’t want to meet"
Shows desperation putting in that kind of effort.
It's a kind of power trip to from the women too.
Then they guy they really likes just messaged 'Hey sexy' with a face pic and they reply to him.
It's just not how it works.
It isn't the solution to help men.
|
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"OK femmes of fab. As we hear a lot that men just want honest responses to their messages that they write with effort, I've decided to give myself a challenge.
For one hour I Will honestly respond to messages in my inbox. Truly honest about how that messages makes me feel and if I wouldn't normally respond, why.
Any I receive in that hour, and if I have time any others from the weeks prior I can get to in the time frame.
Anyone else want in? Let's see how they respond to honesty when that's what people say they want. I'm fascinated... Very patronising.
Like men need teaching etc.
Think you will get pretty generic messages.
It isn't the message it's attraction.
Mark Twain could write it and it wouldn't mean shit if you looked like Quasimodo
Tell me you don't understand that attraction for a majority of femmes comes from psychological attraction without telling me. You're gonna have men wasting more of their time constructing messages with multiple paragraphs and tailoring them to people to still get knocked back.
They are gonna be even more upset then.
Something simple, brief, read their profile.
Test the waters.
It isn't English lessons on here.
No but it is lessons on being a decent human being.
The simple lesson is; treat someone like trash or a collection of warm wet holes, see what happens.
Also, the inference that people shouldn’t be putting effort in and using scattergun messages instead is hilarious.
If you’re indiscriminate with where you send your messages so much that it’s a chore to write messages, then it’s no surprise that people don’t want to meet Shows desperation putting in that kind of effort.
It's a kind of power trip to from the women too.
Then they guy they really likes just messaged 'Hey sexy' with a face pic and they reply to him.
It's just not how it works.
It isn't the solution to help men.
"
When you’re reading your next instalment of ‘men going their own way’ can you find your own way into the bin?
Do us all a favour |
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"OK femmes of fab. As we hear a lot that men just want honest responses to their messages that they write with effort, I've decided to give myself a challenge.
For one hour I Will honestly respond to messages in my inbox. Truly honest about how that messages makes me feel and if I wouldn't normally respond, why.
Any I receive in that hour, and if I have time any others from the weeks prior I can get to in the time frame.
Anyone else want in? Let's see how they respond to honesty when that's what people say they want. I'm fascinated..."
Sup…wuu2..FAF  …
Message copied and pasted Monday 20/3/2023 9:46am |
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I am past the stage of educating men I have no interest in, on how to make themselves more successful here.
Use it as a filter, if you don't like the messages, block men and only send out messages?
Or, you could just ignore the ones you don't have any interest in? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Update. 30mins in and not a single message.
I've not had many but it's early in the day. Might go again at 9pm and give myself some proper work"
Stay strong brothers.
Don't cave |
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"Update. 30mins in and not a single message.
I've not had many but it's early in the day. Might go again at 9pm and give myself some proper work Stay strong brothers.
Don't cave"
I dropped my detailed message in here as she has her filters all set to hell and incorrectly |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I am past the stage of educating men I have no interest in, on how to make themselves more successful here.
Use it as a filter, if you don't like the messages, block men and only send out messages?
Or, you could just ignore the ones you don't have any interest in?"
Exactly, there are tools women can use.
These just want more detailed messages to feed their ego to still reject them.
The arrogance is off the charts. |
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"I am past the stage of educating men I have no interest in, on how to make themselves more successful here.
Use it as a filter, if you don't like the messages, block men and only send out messages?
Or, you could just ignore the ones you don't have any interest in?"
I don't need educating thank you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just a thought. If no one engages with the troll then he may well go elsewhere
What troll? I see no bright hair. Which is also disappointing gang I want some yellow highlighter shit going on.
Also messages update the vast majority have been read and not replied to which is probably for the best..."
I'm intrigued in how you're replying. |
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Tbh nothing mean. Either sarcasm or constructive feedback to those who have asked! No mean responses yet but we'll see.
For clarity I did this as lots of threads in forums imply men would rather feedback on why no reply than just... no reply. Most messages I've received this morning haven't come from this thread. Just normal messages.
I normally do ignore but I wanted to see what would happen if I did respond as men on the forums imply all men want. |
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"Tbh nothing mean. Either sarcasm or constructive feedback to those who have asked! No mean responses yet but we'll see.
For clarity I did this as lots of threads in forums imply men would rather feedback on why no reply than just... no reply. Most messages I've received this morning haven't come from this thread. Just normal messages.
I normally do ignore but I wanted to see what would happen if I did respond as men on the forums imply all men want. "
Not replied to my chivalrous message in the thread |
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"Tbh nothing mean. Either sarcasm or constructive feedback to those who have asked! No mean responses yet but we'll see.
For clarity I did this as lots of threads in forums imply men would rather feedback on why no reply than just... no reply. Most messages I've received this morning haven't come from this thread. Just normal messages.
I normally do ignore but I wanted to see what would happen if I did respond as men on the forums imply all men want. "
Have you found any you actually like though? |
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"Tbh nothing mean. Either sarcasm or constructive feedback to those who have asked! No mean responses yet but we'll see.
For clarity I did this as lots of threads in forums imply men would rather feedback on why no reply than just... no reply. Most messages I've received this morning haven't come from this thread. Just normal messages.
I normally do ignore but I wanted to see what would happen if I did respond as men on the forums imply all men want. "
Can’t message due to filters but I wanted to say that I’ve become accustomed to no answer meaning no interest. The only blurring of the line is where messages appear to be in opened and left there , not deleted, which has maid me wonder if they have been seen however I then realised you can read without opening. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Tbh nothing mean. Either sarcasm or constructive feedback to those who have asked! No mean responses yet but we'll see.
For clarity I did this as lots of threads in forums imply men would rather feedback on why no reply than just... no reply. Most messages I've received this morning haven't come from this thread. Just normal messages.
I normally do ignore but I wanted to see what would happen if I did respond as men on the forums imply all men want. "
I'm usually quite honest with my replies, and as a result I've helped a few on their way.
We've had few bad responses as a result, though some have been venomous. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Tbh nothing mean. Either sarcasm or constructive feedback to those who have asked! No mean responses yet but we'll see.
For clarity I did this as lots of threads in forums imply men would rather feedback on why no reply than just... no reply. Most messages I've received this morning haven't come from this thread. Just normal messages.
I normally do ignore but I wanted to see what would happen if I did respond as men on the forums imply all men want.
Can’t message due to filters but I wanted to say that I’ve become accustomed to no answer meaning no interest. The only blurring of the line is where messages appear to be in opened and left there , not deleted, which has maid me wonder if they have been seen however I then realised you can read without opening. "
No reply = No attraction.
Simple as that.
It wasn't because because you got a C on your English exam.
|
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To be honest, i think most men don't want to be 'educated'. You can't teach an old dog new tricks and all that. I really think its as simple as engage with someone you like, block/delete those you don't or who are rude/abusive. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"OK femmes of fab. As we hear a lot that men just want honest responses to their messages that they write with effort, I've decided to give myself a challenge.
For one hour I Will honestly respond to messages in my inbox. Truly honest about how that messages makes me feel and if I wouldn't normally respond, why.
Any I receive in that hour, and if I have time any others from the weeks prior I can get to in the time frame.
Anyone else want in? Let's see how they respond to honesty when that's what people say they want. I'm fascinated... Very patronising.
Like men need teaching etc.
Think you will get pretty generic messages.
It isn't the message it's attraction.
Mark Twain could write it and it wouldn't mean shit if you looked like Quasimodo "
Here's comes the shade for the day, no danger of sunburn....as the derailment is happening..... |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
I actually rarely get messages but then my filters are tighter than a ducks ass as well because I learnt early on to set them.
I don't see the point though in replying to some messages or explaining why I don't want to meet some random guy for sex right now. Because men sending those messages don't care it's a scatter gun approach they think will work because they are horny when they send it.Most likely once the horn was gone they would chicken out of any meet they tried to arrange at the time.
I do reply to some messages I get especially if they have made an effort with their profile and the majority of any replies I got after were just a thank you for replying. I've had to odd abusive one they just get blocked.
I wouldn't reply to educate anyone on how a message makes me feel though if they send a faf etc message they wouldn't care anyhow,and I'm not here to tell men how to act like a decent person, if they don't have the common sense to know and need to actually be told then they aren't worth my time.
There are loads of men on here who aren't twats and they make fab worthwhile. |
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Really interesting thread, thanks OP!
I don't message very often but when I do I try to tailor to what I've seen in the profile. If I get no reply I take it as a "no attraction" response which can be disheartening but hey, you can't force people to feel it, can you? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Tbh nothing mean. Either sarcasm or constructive feedback to those who have asked! No mean responses yet but we'll see.
For clarity I did this as lots of threads in forums imply men would rather feedback on why no reply than just... no reply. Most messages I've received this morning haven't come from this thread. Just normal messages.
I normally do ignore but I wanted to see what would happen if I did respond as men on the forums imply all men want.
Can’t message due to filters but I wanted to say that I’ve become accustomed to no answer meaning no interest. The only blurring of the line is where messages appear to be in opened and left there , not deleted, which has maid me wonder if they have been seen however I then realised you can read without opening. No reply = No attraction.
Simple as that.
It wasn't because because you got a C on your English exam.
"
It's getting old and boring now, change the script change the narrative, ppl come here what ever reason...not be bombarded with forced rhetoric that actually hold no value, because there's no actual grounding to it... let people crack on, stick to there side of the street, appreciate that your am expert on these matters, and must make some real indepth and valuable connections (sarcasim, in case it was lost) with women...just do you mate. Because when your focusing on others your not watching yourself, which I'd suggest you do |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t see the point in replying to every generic message explaining why we aren’t interested. If someone has a good profile and has written a thought out message then I’ll always take the time to reply politely.
It isn’t just men that put zero effort into their messages and I’ve actually had women refusing the accept that we just aren’t interested and then hurling abuse or guilt tripping. The majority of men we’ve came across have been respectful and polite. Of course there’s going to be a few dickheads in amongst the good but you find that everywhere in life not just on fab. There’s some good eggs on here and I feel like we spend so much time focusing on the bad ones. |
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"I don’t see the point in replying to every generic message explaining why we aren’t interested. If someone has a good profile and has written a thought out message then I’ll always take the time to reply politely.
It isn’t just men that put zero effort into their messages and I’ve actually had women refusing the accept that we just aren’t interested and then hurling abuse or guilt tripping. The majority of men we’ve came across have been respectful and polite. Of course there’s going to be a few dickheads in amongst the good but you find that everywhere in life not just on fab. There’s some good eggs on here and I feel like we spend so much time focusing on the bad ones. "
Some Men just use the ‘send to all’ method on the iff chance a woman on here isnt busy - so they get out of it what they put in - nothing. I choose who i message and write to them only so it cant be a cut and paste - i take the time and occasionally I get a reply sometimes I dont - thats just the way it is. This isnt really a new topic is it? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don’t see the point in replying to every generic message explaining why we aren’t interested. If someone has a good profile and has written a thought out message then I’ll always take the time to reply politely.
It isn’t just men that put zero effort into their messages and I’ve actually had women refusing the accept that we just aren’t interested and then hurling abuse or guilt tripping. The majority of men we’ve came across have been respectful and polite. Of course there’s going to be a few dickheads in amongst the good but you find that everywhere in life not just on fab. There’s some good eggs on here and I feel like we spend so much time focusing on the bad ones.
Some Men just use the ‘send to all’ method on the iff chance a woman on here isnt busy - so they get out of it what they put in - nothing. I choose who i message and write to them only so it cant be a cut and paste - i take the time and occasionally I get a reply sometimes I dont - thats just the way it is. This isnt really a new topic is it? "
No it’s not and I think we all just need to accept that there’s always going to be those people who put no effort in to messaging or who are rude/ abusive, it’s not right but it’s life just ignore or block and move on. No point in trying to “educate” people who clearly aren’t interested in how to be a decent person in the first place and focus on the people who make an effort. |
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"I don’t see the point in replying to every generic message explaining why we aren’t interested. If someone has a good profile and has written a thought out message then I’ll always take the time to reply politely.
It isn’t just men that put zero effort into their messages and I’ve actually had women refusing the accept that we just aren’t interested and then hurling abuse or guilt tripping. The majority of men we’ve came across have been respectful and polite. Of course there’s going to be a few dickheads in amongst the good but you find that everywhere in life not just on fab. There’s some good eggs on here and I feel like we spend so much time focusing on the bad ones.
Some Men just use the ‘send to all’ method on the iff chance a woman on here isnt busy - so they get out of it what they put in - nothing. I choose who i message and write to them only so it cant be a cut and paste - i take the time and occasionally I get a reply sometimes I dont - thats just the way it is. This isnt really a new topic is it?
No it’s not and I think we all just need to accept that there’s always going to be those people who put no effort in to messaging or who are rude/ abusive, it’s not right but it’s life just ignore or block and move on. No point in trying to “educate” people who clearly aren’t interested in how to be a decent person in the first place and focus on the people who make an effort. "
Nailed it Shivs x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've quite a good reminder of how a ruined inbox looks.
You were brave OP
Ive broken your code by the way!! "
I bet you haven't, it's gone way over so many heads. Wrong heads are being used! |
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"I've quite a good reminder of how a ruined inbox looks.
You were brave OP
Ive broken your code by the way!!
I bet you haven't, it's gone way over so many heads. Wrong heads are being used! "
Definitely have - I can do sudoku and logic puzzles and your code was difficult but not the enigma… it involves a series of ropes wheels and pulleys and an old hieroglyph as the key- a bottle Of wine, chocolate and a dvd of Beaches!! |
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"Very patronising.
Like men need teaching etc.
Think you will get pretty generic messages.
It isn't the message it's attraction.
Mark Twain could write it and it wouldn't mean shit if you looked like Quasimodo
How are you such an expert on what women want when everything you post gives the impression you have no luck with women? "
I love you for this Jamie  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I actually rarely get messages but then my filters are tighter than a ducks ass as well because I learnt early on to set them. "
Not sure about tighter than a ducks arse, there is at least one person on here who puts "looking for men", but then if you were to click on 'send message' the Fab warning "Sorry, you can't send private mail to this user
Why? User has blocked everyone of your sex" comes up.
Another of my favourite fabbers often sets her filter to "Aged from 98 to 99 only" - i think that is the best! |
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Guys, again, I don't normally do this and I don't WANT to educate people but I get told a lot "at least respond and tell me why not". So I thought I would and see how it goes. Turns out, total waste of time, so I will continue to only respond to messages and profiles I want to.
At least now I have evidence that if I do respond with a meaningful thought out honest response, the person either continues to press for meeting, ignores it, or calls me a bitch. Affirms that no good comes of it so I'll stop feeling bad for not responding to every message.
Sorry this seems to have been controversial just though it'd be fun to document.
And yes had some lovely messages from people who found me via this thread and am half planning a few socials! |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
"I actually rarely get messages but then my filters are tighter than a ducks ass as well because I learnt early on to set them.
Not sure about tighter than a ducks arse, there is at least one person on here who puts "looking for men", but then if you were to click on 'send message' the Fab warning "Sorry, you can't send private mail to this user
Why? User has blocked everyone of your sex" comes up.
Another of my favourite fabbers often sets her filter to "Aged from 98 to 99 only" - i think that is the best!"
Yes I have tight filters and it stops a lot of messages that is why I use them.
Just because you can't send. Pm to someone it does not mean that they aren't looking for men on here. It probably just means they actually look for profiles they like and send first contact messages themselves.I know when I am looking to do new meets I have no issue with sending a first message to someone.
My filters are set to stop a load of messages from people I most likely won't be interested in. I don't see the point in recieving a load of messages daily that I won't have time to read no matter reply to.I think that just annoys everyone involved and is pointless.And anyone cheating to get around my filters gets their messages deleted unread.
But that is just how I do fab and it works well for me. And if a profile I like doesn't allow me to message than I just move on.I don't see why it pisses people off so much when they can't send a message it just means the person is taking control of their inbox and setting their filters.Move onto someone who you can message. |
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"I actually rarely get messages but then my filters are tighter than a ducks ass as well because I learnt early on to set them.
Not sure about tighter than a ducks arse, there is at least one person on here who puts "looking for men", but then if you were to click on 'send message' the Fab warning "Sorry, you can't send private mail to this user
Why? User has blocked everyone of your sex" comes up.
Another of my favourite fabbers often sets her filter to "Aged from 98 to 99 only" - i think that is the best!"
My filters are no men, no women, no trans people, no couples. Even though in theory I'm looking for all of them.
It's glorious. |
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"I actually rarely get messages but then my filters are tighter than a ducks ass as well because I learnt early on to set them.
Not sure about tighter than a ducks arse, there is at least one person on here who puts "looking for men", but then if you were to click on 'send message' the Fab warning "Sorry, you can't send private mail to this user
Why? User has blocked everyone of your sex" comes up.
Another of my favourite fabbers often sets her filter to "Aged from 98 to 99 only" - i think that is the best!
My filters are no men, no women, no trans people, no couples. Even though in theory I'm looking for all of them.
It's glorious."
sounds like a good filter.
Does this mean, you approach profile/people that catches your eye? |
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"I actually rarely get messages but then my filters are tighter than a ducks ass as well because I learnt early on to set them.
Not sure about tighter than a ducks arse, there is at least one person on here who puts "looking for men", but then if you were to click on 'send message' the Fab warning "Sorry, you can't send private mail to this user
Why? User has blocked everyone of your sex" comes up.
Another of my favourite fabbers often sets her filter to "Aged from 98 to 99 only" - i think that is the best!
My filters are no men, no women, no trans people, no couples. Even though in theory I'm looking for all of them.
It's glorious.
sounds like a good filter.
Does this mean, you approach profile/people that catches your eye? "
In theory, yes.
In practice, my profile text gives the answer - not meeting, you can't message me, not meeting in all of these ways. |
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"Guys, again, I don't normally do this and I don't WANT to educate people but I get told a lot "at least respond and tell me why not". So I thought I would and see how it goes. Turns out, total waste of time, so I will continue to only respond to messages and profiles I want to.
At least now I have evidence that if I do respond with a meaningful thought out honest response, the person either continues to press for meeting, ignores it, or calls me a bitch. Affirms that no good comes of it so I'll stop feeling bad for not responding to every message.
Sorry this seems to have been controversial just though it'd be fun to document.
And yes had some lovely messages from people who found me via this thread and am half planning a few socials! "
That's my girl!!! I love you! Some absolute tripe being posted across the forum recently by a certain profile and it certainly makes for easy blocking.
I know you are not in the tiniest arrogant nor wanting to do this for any self gratification, you genuinely like to help people x
You do you my lovely and fuck em  |
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"I actually rarely get messages but then my filters are tighter than a ducks ass as well because I learnt early on to set them.
Not sure about tighter than a ducks arse, there is at least one person on here who puts "looking for men", but then if you were to click on 'send message' the Fab warning "Sorry, you can't send private mail to this user
Why? User has blocked everyone of your sex" comes up.
Another of my favourite fabbers often sets her filter to "Aged from 98 to 99 only" - i think that is the best!
My filters are no men, no women, no trans people, no couples. Even though in theory I'm looking for all of them.
It's glorious.
sounds like a good filter.
Does this mean, you approach profile/people that catches your eye?
In theory, yes.
In practice, my profile text gives the answer - not meeting, you can't message me, not meeting in all of these ways."
Beauty of the filters.
Thank you for answering  |
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By *ORBCouple
over a year ago
Dundalk |
This profile is about 8 or 9 months old at this stage and in that time we have had less than 30 messages in total which tells me that contrary to popular opinion, people do actually read profiles and acknowledge what is said on them.
Regardless, we respond to every message and although we have had a few chancers they have generally been ok when told they aren't what we are looking for.
We have had a couple who thought we were amazing in their opening message but up our own holes when we said thanks but no thanks.
Those were the ones who pushed for honest answers on why and what they could do to improve. They were also well verified blank profiles who were living off the reputation they had carved out on previous profiles.
Advice threads never reach their targets because so many don't want honest replies and have no interest in changing their tactics.
It's obvious from various threads in recent days that some people use private messages in the same way they use the forums. Namely to wind people up and cause aggro.
RB |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My filters are no men, no women, no trans people, no couples. Even though in theory I'm looking for all of them.
It's glorious."
Had to just check that as you are not someone who comes up on my searches (as firstly you are not within 10 miles and secondly you are outside my age range). That does seem a good way to stop unwanted contacts - the alternative appears to be put yourself down as a man (guaranteed to keep your inbox empty, except the occasional message from old friends, who use watsapp anyway) |
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"...It isn't the message it's attraction.
Mark Twain could write it and it wouldn't mean shit if you looked like Quasimodo "
·
No, it's •mostly• the message. The attraction is often the by-product of a hand-crafted and imaginative message. |
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"My filters are no men, no women, no trans people, no couples. Even though in theory I'm looking for all of them.
It's glorious.
Had to just check that as you are not someone who comes up on my searches (as firstly you are not within 10 miles and secondly you are outside my age range). That does seem a good way to stop unwanted contacts - the alternative appears to be put yourself down as a man (guaranteed to keep your inbox empty, except the occasional message from old friends, who use watsapp anyway)"
Oh, I would know if my filters weren't working  |
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