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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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If you don't know what this is it's the secret removal of the condom during sex.
The first guy to be prosecuted for it is in the Netherlands and has gotten a 3 month suspended sentence.
Is that a joke sentence? Should this not be an immediate custodial sentence and a decade on a register? Thoughts? |
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"I'd need the context to assess it. Whilst it's horrific, we've not been told the details of the Dutch prnalty ranges etc. Whether he accepted guilt, etc"
Under Dutch law, it’s not R. He was convicted of coercive behaviour.
Not sure how that works under UK law though. I wonder if a precedent has been set? |
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The sentence should have been a lot stronger, but then I don’t know Dutch law to comment.
Don’t think there’s even been a precedent in the UK regarding stealthing yet.  how that’ll go is anyone’s guess. |
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Actually, turns out there has been a successful prosecution for it in the UK. 2019, bloke in Bournemouth was successfully convicted of r*pe after he removed the condom, therefore breaking the conditions upon which consent was given.
Well I never.  |
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"Actually, turns out there has been a successful prosecution for it in the UK. 2019, bloke in Bournemouth was successfully convicted of r*pe after he removed the condom, therefore breaking the conditions upon which consent was given.
Well I never. "
I'm on the fence about this. Removing the condom is obviously out of order but I wouldn't say it's r@pe. |
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"Actually, turns out there has been a successful prosecution for it in the UK. 2019, bloke in Bournemouth was successfully convicted of r*pe after he removed the condom, therefore breaking the conditions upon which consent was given.
Well I never.
I'm on the fence about this. Removing the condom is obviously out of order but I wouldn't say it's r@pe."
It’s a tricky one. I’d argue it was r*pe as the condom was the condition upon which consent was given, then he removed it against her wishes and carried on.
He got 12 years for it and on the register for life. |
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"Actually, turns out there has been a successful prosecution for it in the UK. 2019, bloke in Bournemouth was successfully convicted of r*pe after he removed the condom, therefore breaking the conditions upon which consent was given.
Well I never.
I'm on the fence about this. Removing the condom is obviously out of order but I wouldn't say it's r@pe.
It’s a tricky one. I’d argue it was r*pe as the condom was the condition upon which consent was given, then he removed it against her wishes and carried on.
He got 12 years for it and on the register for life. "
I really don't think it's the same as what I believe r@pe to be - ie insertion of a penis or other instrument without consent. And there have been many cases of this where the custodial sentence was way less than 12 yrs.
Very confusing |
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"Actually, turns out there has been a successful prosecution for it in the UK. 2019, bloke in Bournemouth was successfully convicted of r*pe after he removed the condom, therefore breaking the conditions upon which consent was given.
Well I never.
I'm on the fence about this. Removing the condom is obviously out of order but I wouldn't say it's r@pe.
It’s a tricky one. I’d argue it was r*pe as the condom was the condition upon which consent was given, then he removed it against her wishes and carried on.
He got 12 years for it and on the register for life.
I really don't think it's the same as what I believe r@pe to be - ie insertion of a penis or other instrument without consent. And there have been many cases of this where the custodial sentence was way less than 12 yrs.
Very confusing "
Don’t forget, previous convictions can affect sentences and we don’t know his previous. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually, turns out there has been a successful prosecution for it in the UK. 2019, bloke in Bournemouth was successfully convicted of r*pe after he removed the condom, therefore breaking the conditions upon which consent was given.
Well I never.
I'm on the fence about this. Removing the condom is obviously out of order but I wouldn't say it's r@pe.
It’s a tricky one. I’d argue it was r*pe as the condom was the condition upon which consent was given, then he removed it against her wishes and carried on.
He got 12 years for it and on the register for life.
I really don't think it's the same as what I believe r@pe to be - ie insertion of a penis or other instrument without consent. And there have been many cases of this where the custodial sentence was way less than 12 yrs.
Very confusing "
In UK R*** is where the penetration by a penis of vagina, mouth or anus occurs without consent.
Consent cannot be obtained by deception and consent can be withdrawn at any time.
If consent is in the basis of a condom being used, and it is removed intentionally without the victim's knowledge, then continued consent would most likely fit the deception criteria.
The sentence will depend on all sorts of factors; previous convictions, premeditation, guilty or not guilty plea etc etc. |
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It cuts both ways as well. A German woman was convicted and of the same for poking holes on her Fwb’s condoms to try and get pregnant. Apparently she got feelings for him and wanted more, but he only was interested in a casual relationship.
She was jailed.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
This article says it is r@pe under English and Welsh law:
https://rapecrisis.org.uk/get-informed/types-of-sexual-violence/what-is-rape/"
Absolutely. The lady consented to penetrative sex with a condom, she didn't consent to penetrative sex without it so how can it be anything other than r@pe |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If you don't know what this is it's the secret removal of the condom during sex.
The first guy to be prosecuted for it is in the Netherlands and has gotten a 3 month suspended sentence.
Is that a joke sentence? Should this not be an immediate custodial sentence and a decade on a register? Thoughts?"
I'd say it's hard to prove the intent.
I've had several instances where the condom has got lost inside the woman. Have to make sure the condom fits or regularly check when thrusting.
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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago
Stoke area |
"
I've had several instances where the condom has got lost inside the woman. Have to make sure the condom fits or regularly check when thrusting.
"
Pardon ! If you have had condoms getting lost inside women on several occasions, that's setting off alarm bells for me. No chance would I consider having sex with you. Maybe you need to buy smaller, better fitting condoms  .
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
I've had several instances where the condom has got lost inside the woman. Have to make sure the condom fits or regularly check when thrusting.
Pardon ! If you have had condoms getting lost inside women on several occasions, that's setting off alarm bells for me. No chance would I consider having sex with you. Maybe you need to buy smaller, better fitting condoms .
"
I have gotten tests straight after this has happened,
There is only so much a condom can take sometimes, they aren't made for machines. |
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By *oding1Man
over a year ago
marlow |
I have a horror story from my youth.
Picked up a young girl at a disco (shows my age)
We were both about 19
Made love in the back of my car, used a condom. When I pulled out when finished , no condom.
Felt around couldn't find it, told the lady and off she went never to be seen again.
Still wonder about it 53 years later. |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"
I've had several instances where the condom has got lost inside the woman. Have to make sure the condom fits or regularly check when thrusting.
Pardon ! If you have had condoms getting lost inside women on several occasions, that's setting off alarm bells for me. No chance would I consider having sex with you. Maybe you need to buy smaller, better fitting condoms .
I have gotten tests straight after this has happened,
There is only so much a condom can take sometimes, they aren't made for machines. "
I'd suggest you do some research.
They're literally tested on machines- for burst pressure, inflation volume, optical checks to look for holes and imperfections.
Education is a wonderful thing. It may also give you an idea how to find condoms that fit properly so they don't 'accidentally come off' inside a woman.
A |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
I've had several instances where the condom has got lost inside the woman. Have to make sure the condom fits or regularly check when thrusting.
Pardon ! If you have had condoms getting lost inside women on several occasions, that's setting off alarm bells for me. No chance would I consider having sex with you. Maybe you need to buy smaller, better fitting condoms .
"
Yeah that’s usually sign the condom is too big for the wearer isn’t it? |
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"
It’s a tricky one. I’d argue it was r*pe as the condom was the condition upon which consent was given, then he removed it against her wishes and carried on.
He got 12 years for it and on the register for life. "
I’m inclined to go with this as view.
Consent isn’t linear and therefore subject to change at any time based on verbal or non verbal cues. Changing the conditions part way through changes everything.
If he thought it would be ok surely you’d ask or do it in a clearly obvious manner and not in a stealth fashion. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
I've had several instances where the condom has got lost inside the woman. Have to make sure the condom fits or regularly check when thrusting.
Pardon ! If you have had condoms getting lost inside women on several occasions, that's setting off alarm bells for me. No chance would I consider having sex with you. Maybe you need to buy smaller, better fitting condoms .
I have gotten tests straight after this has happened,
There is only so much a condom can take sometimes, they aren't made for machines.
I'd suggest you do some research.
They're literally tested on machines- for burst pressure, inflation volume, optical checks to look for holes and imperfections.
Education is a wonderful thing. It may also give you an idea how to find condoms that fit properly so they don't 'accidentally come off' inside a woman.
A"
You following me around again.
Very obsessive behaviour this.
I like women, sorry buddy. |
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|
By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"
I've had several instances where the condom has got lost inside the woman. Have to make sure the condom fits or regularly check when thrusting.
Pardon ! If you have had condoms getting lost inside women on several occasions, that's setting off alarm bells for me. No chance would I consider having sex with you. Maybe you need to buy smaller, better fitting condoms .
I have gotten tests straight after this has happened,
There is only so much a condom can take sometimes, they aren't made for machines.
I'd suggest you do some research.
They're literally tested on machines- for burst pressure, inflation volume, optical checks to look for holes and imperfections.
Education is a wonderful thing. It may also give you an idea how to find condoms that fit properly so they don't 'accidentally come off' inside a woman.
A You following me around again.
Very obsessive behaviour this.
I like women, sorry buddy. "
Sorry.
You're not my type.  
A |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
I've had several instances where the condom has got lost inside the woman. Have to make sure the condom fits or regularly check when thrusting.
Pardon ! If you have had condoms getting lost inside women on several occasions, that's setting off alarm bells for me. No chance would I consider having sex with you. Maybe you need to buy smaller, better fitting condoms .
I have gotten tests straight after this has happened,
There is only so much a condom can take sometimes, they aren't made for machines.
I'd suggest you do some research.
They're literally tested on machines- for burst pressure, inflation volume, optical checks to look for holes and imperfections.
Education is a wonderful thing. It may also give you an idea how to find condoms that fit properly so they don't 'accidentally come off' inside a woman.
A You following me around again.
Very obsessive behaviour this.
I like women, sorry buddy.
Sorry.
You're not my type.
A"
I'll take you out for dinner like Robert Pattinson did with his stalker and moan about my life, you might leave me alone then. |
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"Should be prosecuted as a R word. It's no different, it is sex without consent.
I'd say it's very different."
In the uk it is classed as the R word.
Consent was not given for sex without a condom and therefore classed as non consensual sex. There has been a successful prosecution in the uk for it as the R word. |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"
I've had several instances where the condom has got lost inside the woman. Have to make sure the condom fits or regularly check when thrusting.
Pardon ! If you have had condoms getting lost inside women on several occasions, that's setting off alarm bells for me. No chance would I consider having sex with you. Maybe you need to buy smaller, better fitting condoms .
I have gotten tests straight after this has happened,
There is only so much a condom can take sometimes, they aren't made for machines.
I'd suggest you do some research.
They're literally tested on machines- for burst pressure, inflation volume, optical checks to look for holes and imperfections.
Education is a wonderful thing. It may also give you an idea how to find condoms that fit properly so they don't 'accidentally come off' inside a woman.
A You following me around again.
Very obsessive behaviour this.
I like women, sorry buddy.
Sorry.
You're not my type.
A I'll take you out for dinner like Robert Pattinson did with his stalker and moan about my life, you might leave me alone then. "
No ta.
If you wait a fair old while Andrew might be free for a bite to eat. You two would have lots of common ground to discuss over dinner.
A |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I consider it as R-pe, the person came inside her with her thinking that a condom was being used.
It could lead her open to many things, and repercussions. |
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Sex is consensual given an understanding so if a woman consents to sex that she believes to be protected sex and that is what happens… thats fine that is what she has consented to. If the guy removes the condom without her knowledge thats a deliberate act by him that then changes the fundamental agreement to which at that point she hasnt consented. I would happily see a guy prosecuted for non consensual sex whatever charge that might be. If it splits unbeknownst to either party that isnt a deliberate act and so would be an accident. For me its about consent to sex with agreed conditions. You can’t unilaterally decide to change the conditions and either party has the right to withdraw consent at any point - just my 2p worth |
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"Sex is consensual given an understanding so if a woman consents to sex that she believes to be protected sex and that is what happens… thats fine that is what she has consented to. If the guy removes the condom without her knowledge thats a deliberate act by him that then changes the fundamental agreement to which at that point she hasnt consented. I would happily see a guy prosecuted for non consensual sex whatever charge that might be. If it splits unbeknownst to either party that isnt a deliberate act and so would be an accident. For me its about consent to sex with agreed conditions. You can’t unilaterally decide to change the conditions and either party has the right to withdraw consent at any point - just my 2p worth"
Absolutely agree |
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given most r*pes go unprosecuted I’d say anything is better than nothing but yes it does seem like a weak sentence 
