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Free poems! Get four terrible lines right here ladies!
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"Ok, Chrisone85. Let’s see what you’ve got  "
The pressure's on, and it's red for danger,
If I muck up I'll just become some desperate stranger,
All I can say is lucky Surrey,
Guildford's finest is Hotter than a curry!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ok, Chrisone85. Let’s see what you’ve got
The pressure's on, and it's red for danger,
If I muck up I'll just become some desperate stranger,
All I can say is lucky Surrey,
Guildford's finest is Hotter than a curry!
"
Excellent work! |
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"Ok, Chrisone85. Let’s see what you’ve got
The pressure's on, and it's red for danger,
If I muck up I'll just become some desperate stranger,
All I can say is lucky Surrey,
Guildford's finest is Hotter than a curry!
Excellent work!"
Anytime! |
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In my head this post had all the women gagging,
Instead it's limp, quiet and very quickly flagging,
Maybe it's my English and I need to return to school,
But my offer still stands of rhymes for females all. |
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"Go on then, let's see what you have
Mrs "
What a nice couple and she enjoys a light flogging,
This prose is tricky and testing me noggin',
Quite far away up in lovely Leeds,
But gets all the attention of all the hungry steeds!
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"I’d like a poem please  "
The Shivs sounds like a book by Roald Dahl,
Except what they get up to will make you more than smile,
George and his marvellous medicine has nothing on them,
You'll not turn the page when confronted by this fem!
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"I would love a poem  "
Hows Aquaman and Zeus since you live in Atlantis,
I'm sure all the mermen want to get in your panties,
Those are serious curves and no need for a buoyancy aid,
So whaddya think, do I make the grade?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I’d like a poem please
The Shivs sounds like a book by Roald Dahl,
Except what they get up to will make you more than smile,
George and his marvellous medicine has nothing on them,
You'll not turn the page when confronted by this fem!
"
I love it |
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"They probably won't make you horny,
Many will be rubbish and corny,
But step right up, here goes,
I'm offering you all free prose.
This made me chuckle!"
I'm glad it raised a smile and a laugh,
Now if you could just wear that white top whilst laying in the bath,
Wet t shirt winner in waiting we have right here,
And oh bugger, the Midlands, that's not too near |
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"They probably won't make you horny,
Many will be rubbish and corny,
But step right up, here goes,
I'm offering you all free prose.
This made me chuckle!
I'm glad it raised a smile and a laugh,
Now if you could just wear that white top whilst laying in the bath,
Wet t shirt winner in waiting we have right here,
And oh bugger, the Midlands, that's not too near "
Excellent! Thank you! I’m quite poorly at the moment so this has cheered me up x  |
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"They probably won't make you horny,
Many will be rubbish and corny,
But step right up, here goes,
I'm offering you all free prose.
This made me chuckle!
I'm glad it raised a smile and a laugh,
Now if you could just wear that white top whilst laying in the bath,
Wet t shirt winner in waiting we have right here,
And oh bugger, the Midlands, that's not too near
Excellent! Thank you! I’m quite poorly at the moment so this has cheered me up x "
Ah sorry to hear that. Hope you feel real better soon |
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"I would love a poem
Hows Aquaman and Zeus since you live in Atlantis,
I'm sure all the mermen want to get in your panties,
Those are serious curves and no need for a buoyancy aid,
So whaddya think, do I make the grade?
"
brilliant |
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"Gotta love some flirty poetry "
'youngish couple', yep you're not quite forty,
And I can tell that you're both rather naughty,
The 'hello boys' pic had me think of the wonderbra ad,
That picture of Linda Evangelista was once of the first wanks I had!
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"Please may we have a poem xx "
KinkyKat surrounded by butterflies whilst she works it well,
You can tell time with this couple would be mighty swell,
Not sure I've heard of Bushby but it sounds too good to be true,
Full of ladies with hair round their foofoo! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Please may we have a poem xx
KinkyKat surrounded by butterflies whilst she works it well,
You can tell time with this couple would be mighty swell,
Not sure I've heard of Bushby but it sounds too good to be true,
Full of ladies with hair round their foofoo! "
Haha thanks and as for bushby it's in Leicester |
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"Please may we have a poem xx
KinkyKat surrounded by butterflies whilst she works it well,
You can tell time with this couple would be mighty swell,
Not sure I've heard of Bushby but it sounds too good to be true,
Full of ladies with hair round their foofoo!
Haha thanks and as for bushby it's in Leicester "
Anytime |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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One for the OP
So Chris is a bit of a poet
It's funny that none of us saw it
With his witty words and clever rhymes
In Southampton he'll show you good times.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"One for the OP
So Chris is a bit of a poet
It's funny that none of us saw it
With his witty words and clever rhymes
In Southampton he'll show you good times.
Haha cheers mate. I'll take that! "
No worries mate. Great job you're doing with these |
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By *ooBulMan
over a year ago
Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’ |
Mary had a little lamb.
She kept it in the bucket.
Every time the lamb came out,
The bulldog used to.....
... Put it back again.
Somehow, I don't think Lemn Sissay will be shitting bricks. He's quite safe!!!  |
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"I'd like a wee poem, please.  "
I best not attempt to pronounce your name, I'll probably get it wrong,
So we'll just call you a total stunner and imagine you in a thong,
I hope you've wrapped up warm as these lines might leave you cold,
I can picture the forumites reading this and oh, how their eyes rolled! |
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By *isge BeathaWoman
over a year ago
Here, There and Everywhere |
"I'd like a wee poem, please.
I best not attempt to pronounce your name, I'll probably get it wrong,
So we'll just call you a total stunner and imagine you in a thong,
I hope you've wrapped up warm as these lines might leave you cold,
I can picture the forumites reading this and oh, how their eyes rolled! "
Thank you!  it! |
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"If I could have a poem that would be lovely "
Those fairies will be after this prey,
And time with her with make their day,
The land of make belief is real when this goddess is in town,
Oh dammit I'm pretty short so please look down!
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"Would love a poem if you have time."
Always have time for an arse that's in the air,
Scrolling through I had to stop and stare,
Now that's a bottom that enticing as can be,
Just working out how to get near your vicinity! |
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"Would love a poem if you have time.
Always have time for an arse that's in the air,
Scrolling through I had to stop and stare,
Now that's a bottom that enticing as can be,
Just working out how to get near your vicinity! "
Thanks very clever.  |
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"If I could have a poem that would be lovely
Those fairies will be after this prey,
And time with her with make their day,
The land of make belief is real when this goddess is in town,
Oh dammit I'm pretty short so please look down!
"
Thank you |
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It's so good to stroke a warm pussy
smoothing it's fur oh so bushy
it's good for the lassie
it winks when it's happy
just loving some tickle and slappy.
To have and to hold a stiff willy
while writing a sexy wee dittie
Excites both exponents
creates sticky moments
and ends when a softee looks silly
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"Ah go on, could do with some doggerel! "
Here's to you feeling brighter and better,
And then I can get you wetter and wetter,
The munch in Norfolk sounds really great,
I'll be there with bells on and bring my own plate! |
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"Ah go on, could do with some doggerel!
Here's to you feeling brighter and better,
And then I can get you wetter and wetter,
The munch in Norfolk sounds really great,
I'll be there with bells on and bring my own plate! "
Haha excellent work! |
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"Ah go on, could do with some doggerel!
Here's to you feeling brighter and better,
And then I can get you wetter and wetter,
The munch in Norfolk sounds really great,
I'll be there with bells on and bring my own plate!
Haha excellent work!"
Anytime, it's my pleasure! |
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"Oh, good effort, OP! Do me do me
Mrs TMN x"
Get ready to twist her nips,
It might grant you access to her hips,
She's searching with guys with a bit of a twinkle,
My eyes have that if you can excuse the wrinkles! |
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"I’ll have four lines of gold please Sir
Best butt on fab has _luffy fairy,
Curvaceous and ample but not hairy,
Pretty eyed brunette full of mystique,
She's definitely the type of girl I seek! "
I loveeee it x
Thank you so much keep spreading the smiles  |
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"Oh, good effort, OP! Do me do me
Mrs TMN x
Get ready to twist her nips,
It might grant you access to her hips,
She's searching with guys with a bit of a twinkle,
My eyes have that if you can excuse the wrinkles! "
Ahahaha, that's a hoot! Thank you, OP x |
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"I’m like a late night kebab.
Looks good but regrettably bad.
Licking your lips and you shove it in
Sometimes it might drip down your chin. "
The guy above, ol' woody,
He's definitely one of the goodies,
He has a hammer and will bring the squirty cream,
So hit him up ladies, he's your DIY dream! |
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"I like extra pervy please. "
Hmm extra pervy, I best not just talk about the weather,
I think we'll concentrate on you wearing that leather,
That is a magnificent sight for sore eyes,
Now to work out how to get between your thighs! |
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"Ooo I’d love one OP if you have the time "
That's a very polite request from the lovely Poles,
She's so pretty, there's no need for her to cajole,
Very trendy black bob which looks great when she gives head,
She's into BDSM so be prepared to be whipped into bed! |
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"Go on then "
Here she is, the very alluring Cede,
A night with her is not merely a want, but a need,
She's looking ready for spring, posing with her flowers,
You best plant them back in the ground as you'll be busy for hours! |
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"Ooo I’d love one OP if you have the time
That's a very polite request from the lovely Poles,
She's so pretty, there's no need for her to cajole,
Very trendy black bob which looks great when she gives head,
She's into BDSM so be prepared to be whipped into bed! "
That’s brilliant, thank you OP! Made me laugh for sure. Have a great Easter weekend x |
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"Ooo I’d love one OP if you have the time
That's a very polite request from the lovely Poles,
She's so pretty, there's no need for her to cajole,
Very trendy black bob which looks great when she gives head,
She's into BDSM so be prepared to be whipped into bed!
That’s brilliant, thank you OP! Made me laugh for sure. Have a great Easter weekend x"
Ah thanks! You too! |
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Couldn’t resist doing my own little ditty for you;
Polite, well mannered, a word smith too
Line up ladies this gent could be a dream come true
He teases us with a clothed pic of his bum
But by the look on his cock he’ll make you cum! |
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"Couldn’t resist doing my own little ditty for you;
Polite, well mannered, a word smith too
Line up ladies this gent could be a dream come true
He teases us with a clothed pic of his bum
But by the look on his cock he’ll make you cum! "
I'm flattered, thanks so much! |
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"Couldn’t resist doing my own little ditty for you;
Polite, well mannered, a word smith too
Line up ladies this gent could be a dream come true
He teases us with a clothed pic of his bum
But by the look on his cock he’ll make you cum!
I'm flattered, thanks so much! "
|
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
"Go on then
Here she is, the very alluring Cede,
A night with her is not merely a want, but a need,
She's looking ready for spring, posing with her flowers,
You best plant them back in the ground as you'll be busy for hours! "
I love it!! Is that an offer to keep me busy for hours? |
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"Go on then
Here she is, the very alluring Cede,
A night with her is not merely a want, but a need,
She's looking ready for spring, posing with her flowers,
You best plant them back in the ground as you'll be busy for hours!
I love it!! Is that an offer to keep me busy for hours? "
100% it is! |
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We are from Limerick so no other choice of a format for a poem
There was a young fella called hammer
With every thrust he would ram her
His better half known as thongs
In casual sex saw no wrongs
So many a man would bang her.
|
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"Are poems still available?"
Of course!
Not just for Easter, you can eat her all year,
Oh bugger, up north, if only she were near,
Forget the eggs, she's the one to crack,
Yummier than choco, the ultimate naughty snack! |
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"Yes please. Bring me pure trash in the form of poetry.  "
Always ready to give it some welly,
Is the ever so alluring Meli,
Just turn up clean and not so smelly,
And she'll do stuff they can't show on the telly!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I’m like a late night kebab.
Looks good but regrettably bad.
Licking your lips and you shove it in
Sometimes it might drip down your chin.
The guy above, ol' woody,
He's definitely one of the goodies,
He has a hammer and will bring the squirty cream,
So hit him up ladies, he's your DIY dream! "
Brilliant |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Are poems still available?
Of course!
Not just for Easter, you can eat her all year,
Oh bugger, up north, if only she were near,
Forget the eggs, she's the one to crack,
Yummier than choco, the ultimate naughty snack! "
I am deeply touched |
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"Anyone can give us one
F"
What a great couple, the lovely tempting twosome,
With a body like that, they're anything but gruesome,
Not into name calling so please be polite,
Cut out the BDSM and you might stay the night! |
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"I'd like one please "
With a bust like that I can only wish you lived next door,
Everyday I'd step outside, catch a glimpse, and go phwoar,
Welsh valleys have nothing on the pleasure gap between your mounds,
A pair that'll appeal to all the exquisite boob hounds! |
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"Strong competition on my profile but go on if you wouldn't mind  "
I can't compete with poet laureates so dare not even try,
Let's just focus on how your undies are easy on the eye,
Wonky seam aside, the profile is the type to make my heart race,
And that winning prose they wrote has me put in my place. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'd like one please
With a bust like that I can only wish you lived next door,
Everyday I'd step outside, catch a glimpse, and go phwoar,
Welsh valleys have nothing on the pleasure gap between your mounds,
A pair that'll appeal to all the exquisite boob hounds! "
awww sweet |
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Well the weather's finally better so I've resurrected this thread,
Carefully planning my prose to woo someone into bed,
It's too hot for that you say, oh bugger I'll get the ice,
I'll keep aircon on and will be able to go at it twice!
If four lines of bad rhymes are your thing then come inside! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Well the weather's finally better so I've resurrected this thread,
Carefully planning my prose to woo someone into bed,
It's too hot for that you say, oh bugger I'll get the ice,
I'll keep aircon on and will be able to go at it twice!
If four lines of bad rhymes are your thing then come inside! "
Hit me x |
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"Well the weather's finally better so I've resurrected this thread,
Carefully planning my prose to woo someone into bed,
It's too hot for that you say, oh bugger I'll get the ice,
I'll keep aircon on and will be able to go at it twice!
If four lines of bad rhymes are your thing then come inside!
Hit me x"
Well Jennie has the remote for her Samsung telly,
Not pressing buttons but she's giving it some welly,
There's no fast forwarding involved there I'm sure,
She's taking it slow and having an explore! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Well the weather's finally better so I've resurrected this thread,
Carefully planning my prose to woo someone into bed,
It's too hot for that you say, oh bugger I'll get the ice,
I'll keep aircon on and will be able to go at it twice!
If four lines of bad rhymes are your thing then come inside!
Hit me x
Well Jennie has the remote for her Samsung telly,
Not pressing buttons but she's giving it some welly,
There's no fast forwarding involved there I'm sure,
She's taking it slow and having an explore! "
Quite the wordsmith.
Hampshire's answer to Morrissey! |
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"Well the weather's finally better so I've resurrected this thread,
Carefully planning my prose to woo someone into bed,
It's too hot for that you say, oh bugger I'll get the ice,
I'll keep aircon on and will be able to go at it twice!
If four lines of bad rhymes are your thing then come inside!
Hit me x
Well Jennie has the remote for her Samsung telly,
Not pressing buttons but she's giving it some welly,
There's no fast forwarding involved there I'm sure,
She's taking it slow and having an explore!
Quite the wordsmith.
Hampshire's answer to Morrissey! "
Haha thanks! I'll take that. |
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"There once was a man from Bantu
Who fell asleep in his canoe.
He dreamt of Venus
and played with his penis
Then awoke with a handful of goo! "
I'm sure more than a few fab men can relate to that. Apart from the canoe part perhaps |
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for bihexual
Let me spread you out like a good book I’ve been dying to read.
Let me get lost in you, I want to discover all your secrets.
I want to spend hours between your pages,
I want you to feel my passion as my fingers trail your words.
The way your back arches when I turn the page, As I slip my bookmark between your pages.
lost within nyanza eyes
see the vibrations
with tension so tight
stimulating darkened needs
I want to feel your body shudder as I reach the finale of the epic fairytale that is your body.
|
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"Roll up roll up big penis men
The ones who's balls need their own pen
I'm not here to waste time so let's be blunt
Bend me over and ram my wet cunt"
She's straight to the point and knows what to do,
So come on lads let's join the queue,
Up in brum she wants big penis men,
Oh bugger that's me out then!
|
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"There once was a man from Nantucket,
With a cock so long he could suck it.
He said with a grin,
As he licked off his chin,
If my ear was a cunt I would fuck it!!
"
I know it said four lines... But I can't count!!! |
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