FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Can single men be successful

Can single men be successful

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Can single men be successful on here without going to organised social events or swinging clubs. I feel if you are not in some sort of clique or if you haven't got a bbc it's pretty much a waste of time

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

your profile is the reason why

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman over a year ago

Carlisle usually

If you haven't got the personality and charisma to sell yourself well it's going to be a struggle here.

There's plenty that do alright, but many many more who don't.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Define success

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

your profile is the reason why "

I haven't bothered making an effort because it seems to be a bit pointless.

I had a profile before when I used dab a long time ago and it wasn't much better than what I have now.

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By *enrietteandSamCouple over a year ago

Staffordshire

The cream rises.

Be respectful and interesting in conversation.

Be attractive and mysterious in pictures.

Have a handsome face.

If you’re missing any one of those factors you need to excel in the others.

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By *eliWoman over a year ago

Of course they can. I know some very successful men.

I think if you have some confidence in who you are, know what you want and are happy to talk to women as people rather than single use fleshlights, you can do pretty well on here.

For me, success isn't about numbers, it's about the quality of your meets and if they match what you want. Or at least your penis does.

Look at your profile. How you're presenting yourself. And believe in who you are.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

your profile is the reason why "

To be fair, there is literally no info on your profile for anyone to decide whether to meet you. It's your shop window, and there's nothing in it!

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By *uitednbooted2Man over a year ago

Berkshire

your profile is the reason why "

Yours is not much better tbh

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By *naswingdressWoman over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Yes, they can.

Yes, it's difficult.

It's difficult for everyone for different reasons.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

your profile is the reason why

To be fair, there is literally no info on your profile for anyone to decide whether to meet you. It's your shop window, and there's nothing in it!"

But I have a vagina. So I got plenty of offers

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple over a year ago

Leeds

"Can single men be successful on here without going to organised social events or swinging clubs. I feel if you are not in some sort of clique or if you haven't got a bbc it's pretty much a waste of time

Yes they can with good pics and a good bio.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

your profile is the reason why

Yours is not much better tbh

I know

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By *ornycougaWoman over a year ago

Wherever I lay my hat

If you mean knee deep in clunge.... Yes some can. I have turned down guys for having too many veris - and in particular too many in a very short space of time

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There is a lot of competition on here for single guys xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Damn op. Find a hobby like playing sudoku or jacking off to page 1 hot pics as this thread is losing you brownie points

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple over a year ago

Leeds

your profile is the reason why

I haven't bothered making an effort because it seems to be a bit pointless.

I had a profile before when I used dab a long time ago and it wasn't much better than what I have now."

If you can't make the effort with your profile why should anyone make the effort to reply to you?

It comes across as lazy and I wouldn't want a lazy meet.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So what you are saying is you made not much effort last time and none now. OK

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By *aked2sumCouple over a year ago

Coast

Get out of fab what you put in . To many guys on here think it’s going to be easy like just send a message and a cock pic . Yes it’s a swingers site but yes single guys still need to put some effort in

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think you can, but it's very difficult as on here you're competing with thousands of other men. Personally, I've found social and clubs as a foot through the door to show I'm real and get verifications that way and then off the back of those, I've had more success

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The last line on your bio would make me avoid you, if you not willing to make an effort to enjoy whats here why bother.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

your profile is the reason why

Yours is not much better tbh

I think she want want fabbers to like her personality before sending vag pics

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By *il sub princessWoman over a year ago

West Midlands

Those that have charm

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple over a year ago

Manchester-ish

"...happy to talk to women as people rather than single use fleshlights...

Perfection. Meli nails it in just 12 words.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"...happy to talk to women as people rather than single use fleshlights...

Perfection. Meli nails it in just 12 words.

She invariably does

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By *etcplCouple over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

No.

Single men are just a cash cow for clubs, and there to boost the egos of the women!

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By *umbriaman1962Man over a year ago

outside of penrith

"Yes, they can.

Yes, it's difficult.

It's difficult for everyone for different reasons."

Takes time and patience and yes luck but more politeness don't come on expected a meet

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By *nubisIsisCouple over a year ago

Field Of Reeds

"If you haven't got the personality and charisma to sell yourself well it's going to be a struggle here.

There's plenty that do alright, but many many more who don't."

This is a huge factor and not having endless cock pics

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By *ou only live onceMan over a year ago

London

No, you can't. Pack up now, OP.

Sorry, I meant yes. Just be yourself, OP - there's room for everyone (unless being yourself is being a dick, in which case, try not to be a dick).

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By *un couple 2Couple over a year ago

Tynemouth.

yes, were happy meeting single guys.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

In my previous fab life I don't really forum, and didn't do amss socials. I did alright.

I did paintg my cock black tho.

Cockfishing at its finest.

I'm also incredibly witty and rich. And prone to the odd exaggeration.

What was the question again ?

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By *istyPeaksCouple over a year ago

braintree

your profile is the reason why

I haven't bothered making an effort because it seems to be a bit pointless.

I had a profile before when I used dab a long time ago and it wasn't much better than what I have now."

To be honest (and quite harsh). After reading that. If you messaged me I would decline. If you can’t be *bothered* to write a decent profile & take some decent pictures, why would I assume you’d make any effort with your appearance, hygiene or bedroom skills. I’m sorry lack of effort is a massive turn off.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

your profile is the reason why

Yours is not much better tbh

But she's a woman, l see your point but a woman here doesn't have to make the same effort in anything that a single guy has to, wether they know it or not Women do rule the jungle here.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

All my meets so far were single men with no bbc and i had the best time with them.

They actually had no profile pictures nor any pictures but great personalities.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Many, many single men do yes just looking at my updates and speaking to friends. I think being on the forum is a death knell for a man. Soz

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By *akeanyoneMan over a year ago

I'm not in any sort of clique and never will be, and I definitely don't have a bbc

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Single men that put a little effort in can do well.

Some single guys prefer not to put an ounce of effort into their profiles with no pictures, no bio, whiny status and forum posts and then wish to blame imagined cliques.

Those men don’t do very well.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

your profile is the reason why

To be fair, there is literally no info on your profile for anyone to decide whether to meet you. It's your shop window, and there's nothing in it!

But I have a vagina. So I got plenty of offers "

Miscommunication... supposed to be directed at the OP.

My bad!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"No.

Single men are just a cash cow for clubs, and there to boost the egos of the women!

There ya have it ...in a nutshell...the truth..the whole truth and nothing but the truth ..a cash cow and to boost ego's... simple really..great point made

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By *reamblueMan over a year ago

London

your profile is the reason why

To be fair, there is literally no info on your profile for anyone to decide whether to meet you. It's your shop window, and there's nothing in it!

But I have a vagina. So I got plenty of offers "

This is OP's point. Vagina owners don't have to do anything and offers come flooding in

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

your profile is the reason why

To be fair, there is literally no info on your profile for anyone to decide whether to meet you. It's your shop window, and there's nothing in it!

But I have a vagina. So I got plenty of offers

This is OP's point. Vagina owners don't have to do anything and offers come flooding in"
that's on us men tho.

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By *atthew78Man over a year ago

Winsford

You can only try and hope to learn on the journey

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By *opman121Man over a year ago

stoke on trent

Be polite patient and don’t waste peoples time u will get results

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By *J_SpiceyCouple over a year ago

Kinky Kings Lynn

The effort is the choice of an individual. Those with effort placed correctly will succeed over those that don’t that’s for sure.

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By *.L.0460.Woman over a year ago

Bognor Regis

your profile is the reason why

Yours is not much better tbh

Miow...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

R E S P E C T goes a long way , not only here but in the real World too,am not saying people don't have it but it should be in their armoury.

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By *asty tatsyMan over a year ago

london

I think it depends on what you mean by successful

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Many, many single men do yes just looking at my updates and speaking to friends. I think being on the forum is a death knell for a man. Soz

You think ?...a death knell ?

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By *aribbean King 1985Man over a year ago

South West London

Yeah single men can be successful on here regardless of who, but obviously everyone is different so some single men may get easier meets then others

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By *lym4realCouple over a year ago

plymouth

Depends on what you regard as being "Succesful" and never judge yourself by others as you'll always be a failure ...someone once said ..

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By *phroditeWoman over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Personally, I read profiles and some verifications if the profile appeals. One liners, like some have said, suggest a complete lack of effort which makes me think they are not prepared to make an effort when it comes to meeting me.

A decent profile (does not have to be War and Peace) and a couple of appealing pictures do the trick for me.

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By *IG G77Man over a year ago

GATLEY

Your attitude is poor and your profile says nothing about you

Woe is me attitude wont get you anywhere why should women meet you

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By *he AmbassadorMan over a year ago

IRLANDA. / Prague. / Cil Dara

Op you are a Fab Ninja,

You get out of it what you put in,

Maybe there is a Fab ninja group in the treads,

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Yes we meet single guys. It does all start with how your profile comes across though that’s on both sides

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Yes, they can OP, but you have to put the effort in, be patient and not expect anything

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By *ustBoWoman over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

Yes plenty of men have luck on here without being in a clique or going to a load of socials and clubs.

Like others have said your profile is the most important thing I have found in deciding whether I reply to someone or find someone interesting enough to send a first message to.

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By *ts_Business_TimeCouple over a year ago

Berkshire

Yes

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By *issYeuxBleusWoman over a year ago

My boudoir - S Wales

Yep. I’ve got some friends who are none of those things, they’re always successful. But their profiles are epic.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

your profile is the reason why

Yours is not much better tbh

I think she want want fabbers to like her personality before sending vag pics "

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By *ife NinjaMan over a year ago

Dunfermline

In general, no, but you need to get known. The forum is not a kiss of death, if you do it right, and some of my friends have come off the back of convos on it

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By *uddly GoblinMan over a year ago

Manchester

Yes they can, yes it can be difficult and hard work but it's worth it when you meet the right people

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By *aughty but nice...Man over a year ago

Staffs

Yes you can with perseverance

I'm proof it can be done

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Behind every great man!….

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By *elix SightedMan over a year ago

Cloud 8

Absolutely, OP. They can and I have. Success is a subjective concept but I have met some really great people in and out of the forum.

I have never been to a social (but I will) and, whilst I’ve been to clubs, I had enjoyed slidy pump pump fun sexytime with those people before also playing in a club.

One’s chap is a nice shade of brown but it’s far from big or black. It is definitely a cock, though.

I have put up some varied pictures, written a bio about me, what I like and what I’m looking for, and I play the game.

Obviously it’s more swing-and-a-miss than hits, but occasionally I’ve connected with someone fun.

As with anything in life, effort = reward.

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By *aitonelMan over a year ago

Away for Christmas

Absolutely, OP. They can and I have. Success is a subjective concept but I have met some really great people in and out of the forum.

I have never been to a social (but I will) and, whilst I’ve been to clubs, I had enjoyed slidy pump pump fun sexytime with those people before also playing in a club.

One’s chap is a nice shade of brown but it’s far from big or black. It is definitely a cock, though.

I have put up some varied pictures, written a bio about me, what I like and what I’m looking for, and I play the game.

Obviously it’s more swing-and-a-miss than hits, but occasionally I’ve connected with someone fun.

As with anything in life, effort = reward."

While I mostly agree, all the effort in the world means nothing if they are not attracted to you, and depending upon our own preferences also the chance of success is rather small in the grand scheme of things. A man's success is largely still dictated by women (on here), that's not to say we can't guide ourselves towards success. Some men effort or not will simply have more success than others, or at the very least more opportunity for it.

That is when it comes down to as you say success being subjective and how much stock we place in what it means to be successful.

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By *nonymous95-2Woman over a year ago

Northwich

I think men can, granted its a bit more difficult. I find though that men often tell me that I'm what they're looking for but seem to forget that I need to know about them as well to determine if they're what I'm looking for. I am more than just a hole.

I do love an out of the box approach myself as well. Dick with a top hat or some crazy humour, and I'm your girl.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Define success "

Having the chance to meet who I want to actually meet

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"In general, no, but you need to get known. The forum is not a kiss of death, if you do it right, and some of my friends have come off the back of convos on it

Agree with this and I have found the same. The little horizontal green arrow can be quite enlightening...

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By *rHotNottsMan over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Definitely, contrary to what a lot of guys say about this site it isn’t difficult you just have to make an effort and send proper messages, same as on any site. The numbers of men is irrelevant if you are who someone wants to know and meet

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By *uitednbooted2Man over a year ago

Berkshire

"Definitely, contrary to what a lot of guys say about this site it isn’t difficult you just have to make an effort and send proper messages, same as on any site. The numbers of men is irrelevant if you are who someone wants to know and meet "

Exactly this

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

OP - have you seen The Secret of My Success with Michael J. Fox?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

your profile is the reason why

I haven't bothered making an effort because it seems to be a bit pointless.

I had a profile before when I used dab a long time ago and it wasn't much better than what I have now.

If you can't make the effort with your profile why should anyone make the effort to reply to you?

It comes across as lazy and I wouldn't want a lazy meet.

Mrs "

I haven't messaged anyone for a meet since I've been back on here. If I wanted to do that, I would make more of an effort.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

your profile is the reason why

Yours is not much better tbh

I know "

Love the photo of the Derbyshire countryside on your profile

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"So what you are saying is you made not much effort last time and none now. OK "

No the first time I used this I made effort and I met two women. The first one I didn't fancy her after we had met, she didn't look anything like her pictures.. and the second one I did fancy but she just wanted money from me. I haven't really bothered since.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

your profile is the reason why

To be fair, there is literally no info on your profile for anyone to decide whether to meet you. It's your shop window, and there's nothing in it!

But I have a vagina. So I got plenty of offers "

No personality by the sounds of it

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By *oelDorianMan over a year ago

vanaheim

I would say yes it takes time I think my profile is good and have had some success my only issue is work haha

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By *uitednbooted2Man over a year ago

Berkshire

your profile is the reason why

Yours is not much better tbh

I know

Love the photo of the Derbyshire countryside on your profile

Stock photo off the internet mate

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Your attitude is poor and your profile says nothing about you

Woe is me attitude wont get you anywhere why should women meet you "

Woe is me attitude ? Can you define this please

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

your profile is the reason why

To be fair, there is literally no info on your profile for anyone to decide whether to meet you. It's your shop window, and there's nothing in it!

But I have a vagina. So I got plenty of offers

No personality by the sounds of it

This isn’t facebook dating brav

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"No.

Single men are just a cash cow for clubs, and there to boost the egos of the women!

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By *riving_Home_For_MimiWoman over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

Of course they can, the guys I meet aren't either of those. They're just regular guys, who've made an effort, been decent and made me feel good about myself. Honestly, guys cock block themselves so often, it's really not hard to be polite and respectful.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Yeah they can. I know a few who are really successful by just being a decent person and not making you feel like you’re just another number to add to their list. Being able to hold a decent conversation goes a long way.

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By *isstinseltoesWoman over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Yep they can .

There's loads of single blokes who do well on here .

They do have a good profile and pics usually & make an effort when they send a message out.

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By *itty9899Man over a year ago

Craggy Island

I don't do to badly.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

your profile is the reason why

I haven't bothered making an effort because it seems to be a bit pointless.

I had a profile before when I used dab a long time ago and it wasn't much better than what I have now."

You get out what you put in. If your profile isn't interesting, it's an instant no.

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By *nubisIsisCouple over a year ago

Field Of Reeds

"Your attitude is poor and your profile says nothing about you

Woe is me attitude wont get you anywhere why should women meet you

Woe is me attitude ? Can you define this please "

Your bio is literally 1 line and seems like a half arsed line as well

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By *lephantisMan over a year ago

Oxford

Oh, it's possible. I have women just lining up to hear me talk about early Middle English fabliaux, or my favourite Homeric epithets. I need a fresh shitty stick with which to beat off the Fabacolytes.

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By *riel13Woman over a year ago

Northampton

your profile is the reason why

Yours is not much better tbh

But she's a woman, l see your point but a woman here doesn't have to make the same effort in anything that a single guy has to, wether they know it or not Women do rule the jungle here."

But it doesn't matter if she's a woman or not, if you actually read the text

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think I could bang? Right ladies?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Sure it wouldn't be so difficult if I had the attitude of a any holes a goal kind of man. Not saying you are.

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By *TG3Man over a year ago

Dorchester

Yes

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"No.

Single men are just a cash cow for clubs, and there to boost the egos of the women!

Didn't think I would see a woman giving that the thumbs up

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By *educerMan over a year ago

Brentwood

Yes they can be successful, you get out what you put in!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What are you looking for OP?

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By *oelDorianMan over a year ago

vanaheim

Sure it wouldn't be so difficult if I had the attitude of a any holes a goal kind of man. Not saying you are. "

I don’t have the thought that any hole is a goal but I’m still quite successful all it takes is some patience and actually write something on your bio and take some pictures

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Your attitude is poor and your profile says nothing about you

Woe is me attitude wont get you anywhere why should women meet you

Woe is me attitude ? Can you define this please

Your bio is literally 1 line and seems like a half arsed line as well"

I know my profile is never going to be any good the way it is. This forum was not about profile advice though.

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By *iscean_dreamMan over a year ago

Llanelli

I don't have a BBC and not in a clique but I do ok, I do have a awesome profile though

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By *nubisIsisCouple over a year ago

Field Of Reeds

"Your attitude is poor and your profile says nothing about you

Woe is me attitude wont get you anywhere why should women meet you

Woe is me attitude ? Can you define this please

Your bio is literally 1 line and seems like a half arsed line as well

I know my profile is never going to be any good the way it is. This forum was not about profile advice though."

I think it’s like general advice which speaks to other profiles as well

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By *eiaorganaWoman over a year ago

Dundee

your profile is the reason why

I haven't bothered making an effort because it seems to be a bit pointless.

I had a profile before when I used dab a long time ago and it wasn't much better than what I have now."

No profile means people will just pass you by, so you're basically sabotaging yourself. No effort = no reward

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By *rHotNottsMan over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Sure it wouldn't be so difficult if I had the attitude of a any holes a goal kind of man. Not saying you are. "

Not at all, if you’re a bottom feeder on here you might even find it much harder here than if you have high standards because you’re just one of the Horde and that’s when numbers are against you

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

your profile is the reason why

Yours is not much better tbh

But she's a woman, l see your point but a woman here doesn't have to make the same effort in anything that a single guy has to, wether they know it or not Women do rule the jungle here.

But it doesn't matter if she's a woman or not, if you actually read the text"

I have to disagree here. It do! matter if you are a women. Women will still get messages and offers if they have no pics or profile text. It's just the way it is.

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By *TG3Man over a year ago

Dorchester

."
Agreed i go to clubs but i imagine socials could be good if you know somebody that goes especially a woman as for messaging here I'm quite successful but imagine most guys, especially the ones that think with their dicks will struggle, hope this gives you more insight

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By *istyPeaksCouple over a year ago

braintree

"Your attitude is poor and your profile says nothing about you

Woe is me attitude wont get you anywhere why should women meet you

Woe is me attitude ? Can you define this please

Your bio is literally 1 line and seems like a half arsed line as well

I know my profile is never going to be any good the way it is. This forum was not about profile advice though."

Ok. In which case to answer your question.

Yes single men can be very successful. Usually the ones who make an effort with their profile & don’t proclaim on a forum just how much they can’t be bothered…

For instance

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"What are you looking for OP? "

Nothing at the moment because I have no time for anything, with work I'm always on the move.

If I was looking I'd be looking for a woman like all you guys.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Your attitude is poor and your profile says nothing about you

Woe is me attitude wont get you anywhere why should women meet you

Woe is me attitude ? Can you define this please

Your bio is literally 1 line and seems like a half arsed line as well

I know my profile is never going to be any good the way it is. This forum was not about profile advice though.

Ok. In which case to answer your question.

Yes single men can be very successful. Usually the ones who make an effort with their profile & don’t proclaim on a forum just how much they can’t be bothered…

For instance

I can’t be assed half the time ….. oh, I see what you mean.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I don't have a BBC and not in a clique but I do ok, I do have a awesome profile though

And I see you have also been to socials

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By *rHotNottsMan over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"What are you looking for OP?

Nothing at the moment because I have no time for anything, with work I'm always on the move.

If I was looking I'd be looking for a woman like all you guys."

My advice would be really figure out exactly what it is you really want from fab , because your last sentence sums it up you don't know.

If it’s ‘just a woman like all you guys’ your in the Horde, unfortunately it ain’t gonna be much fun.

Once you really know what you want you will be able to write a good profile and meet people regularly - no matter how much you travel

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By *eiaorganaWoman over a year ago

Dundee

Sure it wouldn't be so difficult if I had the attitude of a any holes a goal kind of man. Not saying you are. "

Actually it would be more difficult, because that's not what most women are looking for.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What are you looking for OP?

Nothing at the moment because I have no time for anything, with work I'm always on the move.

If I was looking I'd be looking for a woman like all you guys."
that sounds very unspecific. I'd imagine that gets in the way more than increases yr chances. (when you are looking)

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By *iscean_dreamMan over a year ago

Llanelli

I don't have a BBC and not in a clique but I do ok, I do have a awesome profile though

And I see you have also been to socials

Yes but I met people long before that, my first meet was a MF couple after a couple of months

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Your attitude is poor and your profile says nothing about you

Woe is me attitude wont get you anywhere why should women meet you

Woe is me attitude ? Can you define this please

Your bio is literally 1 line and seems like a half arsed line as well

I know my profile is never going to be any good the way it is. This forum was not about profile advice though.

I think it’s like general advice which speaks to other profiles as well"

Yes gotcha

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By *amierebelMan over a year ago

nae danger.

I find this sites great for the forums, for meets and stuff though definitely been more successful on other sites.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have met quite a few really nice, genuine people on this site , it’s not easy as a single guy , I am no oil painting and definitely not hung like a horse , you just need to be patient , communicate well and above all , don’t be afraid to be yourself !

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Sure it wouldn't be so difficult if I had the attitude of a any holes a goal kind of man. Not saying you are.

Am I a bottom feeder because of my profile ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Yes. But it requires more effort than a cock pic and a request to meet immediately.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/03/23 19:23:26]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Yes. But it requires more effort than a cock pic and a request to meet immediately."

I haven’t been blocked after sending a dick pic yet. Face pic however

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By *REEPALESTINEMan over a year ago

derby

Stupid questions get stupid answers

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By *riel13Woman over a year ago

Northampton

your profile is the reason why

Yours is not much better tbh

But she's a woman, l see your point but a woman here doesn't have to make the same effort in anything that a single guy has to, wether they know it or not Women do rule the jungle here.

But it doesn't matter if she's a woman or not, if you actually read the text

I have to disagree here. It do! matter if you are a women. Women will still get messages and offers if they have no pics or profile text. It's just the way it is."

That isn't what I meant... I meant what she has on her profile says don't bother, I will find you... Therefore doesn't matter thatbit is as soarse as yours... Yours just says you can't be bothered

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"What are you looking for OP?

Nothing at the moment because I have no time for anything, with work I'm always on the move.

If I was looking I'd be looking for a woman like all you guys.

My advice would be really figure out exactly what it is you really want from fab , because your last sentence sums it up you don't know.

If it’s ‘just a woman like all you guys’ your in the Horde, unfortunately it ain’t gonna be much fun.

Once you really know what you want you will be able to write a good profile and meet people regularly - no matter how much you travel "

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By *eiaorganaWoman over a year ago

Dundee

Sure it wouldn't be so difficult if I had the attitude of a any holes a goal kind of man. Not saying you are.

Am I a bottom feeder because of my profile ? "

Tbh, yes. Just one in a thousand other guys who just scream zero effort.

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By *riel13Woman over a year ago

Northampton

your profile is the reason why

Yours is not much better tbh

But she's a woman, l see your point but a woman here doesn't have to make the same effort in anything that a single guy has to, wether they know it or not Women do rule the jungle here.

But it doesn't matter if she's a woman or not, if you actually read the text

I have to disagree here. It do! matter if you are a women. Women will still get messages and offers if they have no pics or profile text. It's just the way it is.

That isn't what I meant... I meant what she has on her profile says don't bother, I will find you... Therefore doesn't matter thatbit is as soarse as yours... Yours just says you can't be bothered "

Sorry... It doesn't matter if it's as sparse as yours... A man could put that and it be ok too

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By *iscean_dreamMan over a year ago

Llanelli

Sure it wouldn't be so difficult if I had the attitude of a any holes a goal kind of man. Not saying you are.

Am I a bottom feeder because of my profile ? "

No photos and no bio, what do you think?

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By *riving_Home_For_MimiWoman over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

Tbf if you sent an amazing first msg and some great pics, then your profile wouldn't really matter.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"What are you looking for OP?

Nothing at the moment because I have no time for anything, with work I'm always on the move.

If I was looking I'd be looking for a woman like all you guys.that sounds very unspecific. I'd imagine that gets in the way more than increases yr chances. (when you are looking) "

How else could I answer a question like that in the forums. It boils down to that.. it is what it is.

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By *elix SightedMan over a year ago

Cloud 8

Absolutely, OP. They can and I have. Success is a subjective concept but I have met some really great people in and out of the forum.

I have never been to a social (but I will) and, whilst I’ve been to clubs, I had enjoyed slidy pump pump fun sexytime with those people before also playing in a club.

One’s chap is a nice shade of brown but it’s far from big or black. It is definitely a cock, though.

I have put up some varied pictures, written a bio about me, what I like and what I’m looking for, and I play the game.

Obviously it’s more swing-and-a-miss than hits, but occasionally I’ve connected with someone fun.

As with anything in life, effort = reward.

That is when it comes down to as you say success being subjective and how much stock we place in what it means to be successful. "

Absolutely agree with this, my friend.

I couldn’t possibly say that I was successful 100% of the time, because there are people I have wanted to meet that haven’t wanted to meet me.

But then I write that off not as a lack of success, but as a product of life. I’d like to play mummies and daddies with Rachel Riley but, if I asked her, she’d say no (leaving aside her blissfully happy marriage and two kids).

That’s not a lack of success, it’s just personal preference. I get to play mummies and daddies with enough great people to satisfy my appetite and I regard that as success.

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By *TG3Man over a year ago

Dorchester

See knew it

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Not sure I wholly agree with this, while it is down to whether they want to meet you, it is possible to create the perfectly constructed message and it can still go unread if it's buried among the many "Faf" messages. It's a big reason why I've pretty much stopped sending the first message as it started to feel like a fool's errand

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By *riel13Woman over a year ago

Northampton

"Tbf if you sent an amazing first msg and some great pics, then your profile wouldn't really matter."

If we only send messages to people that are attracted to us then our profiles can possibly put them off

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It might not be you, it could be wrong timing

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I find this sites great for the forums, for meets and stuff though definitely been more successful on other sites."

Same. I find women will engage in conversation more on other apps. The forums brought me back to this.

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By *elix SightedMan over a year ago

Cloud 8

"Your attitude is poor and your profile says nothing about you

Woe is me attitude wont get you anywhere why should women meet you

Woe is me attitude ? Can you define this please

Your bio is literally 1 line and seems like a half arsed line as well

I know my profile is never going to be any good the way it is. This forum was not about profile advice though."

OP, you’re absolutely right - it wasn’t a thread asking for profile advice.

BUT - You asked whether we think men can be successful on fab without going to socials or clubs, without being in a clique or having a monster member.

The answer is yes, absolutely they can. But it largely comes down to a good profile and gold messages. We can’t see what messages you’ve sent so attention was naturally drawn toward your profile, such as it is.

Posing questions like this will draw attention to you and you should be prepared for that, especially if you’re bemoaning success of other men on characteristics and behaviour to which you’re not prepared to commit.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Sure it wouldn't be so difficult if I had the attitude of a any holes a goal kind of man. Not saying you are.

Am I a bottom feeder because of my profile ?

Tbh, yes. Just one in a thousand other guys who just scream zero effort."

So I'm a bottom feeder

Haha I like that

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It might not be you, it could be wrong timing "

It’s not you. It’s me!….. ffs.

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By *erces LetiferMan over a year ago

Somewhere off the edge of the map... 'ere there be monsters

Some can, yes. And that's the rub, fellas - it's some; not all.

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By *ust PeachyWoman over a year ago

Prestonish

"I find this sites great for the forums, for meets and stuff though definitely been more successful on other sites.

Same. I find women will engage in conversation more on other apps. The forums brought me back to this. "

In all honesty I doubt anyone would reply to a message from what is essentially a non existent profile - I know I wouldn’t.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I find this sites great for the forums, for meets and stuff though definitely been more successful on other sites.

Same. I find women will engage in conversation more on other apps. The forums brought me back to this.

In all honesty I doubt anyone would reply to a message from what is essentially a non existent profile - I know I wouldn’t. "

Okay I gather bottom feeders are not successful

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By *ust PeachyWoman over a year ago

Prestonish

"I find this sites great for the forums, for meets and stuff though definitely been more successful on other sites.

Same. I find women will engage in conversation more on other apps. The forums brought me back to this.

In all honesty I doubt anyone would reply to a message from what is essentially a non existent profile - I know I wouldn’t.

Okay I gather bottom feeders are not successful

I didn’t call you a bottom feeder (thought that was another term for rimming

)

- but I wouldn’t even open a message from a profile with a silhouette and no text.

I put a hell of a lot of effort into my profile - similarly I put a hell of a lot of effort in when I meet someone.

If someone makes zero effort into their profile I assume - rightly or wrongly - that they’d put zero effort into out meet too.

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By *erces LetiferMan over a year ago

Somewhere off the edge of the map... 'ere there be monsters

"Okay I gather bottom feeders are not successful

Ask yourself; should they be?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Charisma Uniqueness Nerve Talent.

Sadly lacking in most of the messages I get.

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By *jonesMan over a year ago

Plymouth

Yes , even middle aged ones

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By *lex400555Man over a year ago

eltham

well maybe not on here. but if you put yourself out there in the real world… buddy i’m telling you i’ve had some of the wildest nights with some older women clients, bite the bullet and put yourself out there !!

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By *ealitybitesMan over a year ago

Belfast

I've never been to a club. I've been to a handful of socials but only after I'd already done all the heavy lifting with my profile and pics and people knew who I was.

I've never had any issues meeting people on here despite my age which strangely enough has never been a topic of conversation.

I was 52 when I signed up and I don't network on this site at all.

My circle is tiny, I trust very few and yet I have lots of verifications.

What is success judged on?

If it's on verifications alone then yes I've been successful.

If it's on how many people I've managed to shag then many would be disappointed with those numbers but as I've turned down twice as many offers as I've accepted and am more than happy with where I am I judge that as success.

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By *aitonelMan over a year ago

Away for Christmas

Indeed. I'm sort of in the same boat and just going about it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"well maybe not on here. but if you put yourself out there in the real world… buddy i’m telling you i’ve had some of the wildest nights with some older women clients, bite the bullet and put yourself out there !!"

Clients?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Yes ….

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By *ldFashionedGentMan over a year ago

Chelmsford

This is an interesting forum topic.

So firstly, as I believe others have said. You have to define success.

Very few men are going to sign up to an account here and have women and couples beating down their doors. There are some. They’re either unbelievably stunning, have muscles for days or cocks longer than my arms.

As we are all firstly taken by the way someone looks (oh don’t deny it

) this is simply life.

Then you must consider the numbers. I’m blessed to have some wonderful female and couples as friends. I know that they receive hundreds of winks, fabs and messages per day. So for us ‘normal’ folk, standing out from the crowd can be tough.

And we haven’t yet factored in the disparity in numbers. For every single woman or couples profile you’d have to conservatively estimate, say, 10?, 20? Single male profiles.

So what can be done about it.

Firstly as others have said, no profile pic or lack of effort on the profile is not going to lead to anything eye catching. It’s not hard to put up some nice pictures (I hate selfies, it takes twenty pics to find one I kinda like, and it’s nerve wracking sharing). It has to be done.

Secondly it isn’t too difficult to write a profile that is formatted into three simple paragraphs:

Who are you?

Why are you here/what are you looking for?

What do you offer?

If you haven’t made some kind of an effort you’re not going to get noticed. It’s like being at a party and not saying hello to anyone. What did you think was going to happen?

If you’re looking for a quick hookup then with the above guy may or may not get lucky. Some people are into that and more power to them. However swinging I think is a different story, swinging is as much about the community as the naughty antics. Therefore I’d suggest using the forums, contributing, letting your personality come out. Someone may well read something you write and think ‘oh he’s a nice guy’. After all attraction is great, but without laughter, intrigue, comfort, and compatibility it will only go so far (in my opinion). After all we can all have sex, but great sex is presumably why we’re all here.

Anyhoo enough of my utter waffle. To answer the question at hand. Men can be ‘successful’ here in meeting people without socials or clubs. I wouldn’t discount those avenues as any time with folk on the same wavelength has to be a good idea.

The fantastic friends I have here, those that I have met, and those I hope to meet in future would suggest that if I, a generally average guy, can meet people then you (being a single guy who might be reading this) can too.

And now for a breather, I really should shut up.

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By *jonesMan over a year ago

Plymouth

"This is an interesting forum topic.

So firstly, as I believe others have said. You have to define success.

As we are all firstly taken by the way someone looks (oh don’t deny it

) this is simply life.

And we haven’t yet factored in the disparity in numbers. For every single woman or couples profile you’d have to conservatively estimate, say, 10?, 20? Single male profiles.

So what can be done about it.

Secondly it isn’t too difficult to write a profile that is formatted into three simple paragraphs:

Who are you?

Why are you here/what are you looking for?

What do you offer?

If you haven’t made some kind of an effort you’re not going to get noticed. It’s like being at a party and not saying hello to anyone. What did you think was going to happen?

And now for a breather, I really should shut up.

Put your feet up

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By *ealitybitesMan over a year ago

Belfast

your profile is the reason why

Yours is not much better tbh

But she's a woman, l see your point but a woman here doesn't have to make the same effort in anything that a single guy has to, wether they know it or not Women do rule the jungle here."

This is bull actually.

Any woman or couple who can't be arsed making an effort doesn't deserve any effort in return.

Of course they will be inundated with messages but are they really the quality messages they are expecting?

No-one rules this jungle except in their own heads.

Treat people as equals and speak to them as individuals rather than as a collective and you will discover that those almighty pedestal dwelling women have just as many issues and self doubts as everyone else.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Okay I gather bottom feeders are not successful

Ask yourself; should they be?"

Yeah

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By *nywhereyouwantMan over a year ago

Weston-Super-Mare

Yes they can! I’ve met 3 stunning ladies on here (2 at once!) it’s literally just patience and not being pushy and they’ll come

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By *erces LetiferMan over a year ago

Somewhere off the edge of the map... 'ere there be monsters

"Okay I gather bottom feeders are not successful

Ask yourself; should they be?

Yeah

Okay. So the next question becomes: why? Why should women lower their standards, or rather drop them entirely? Let’s reverse it: how many “bottom feeder” women are you willing to lower your standards for?

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By *penbicoupleCouple over a year ago

Northampton

your profile is the reason why

I haven't bothered making an effort because it seems to be a bit pointless.

I had a profile before when I used dab a long time ago and it wasn't much better than what I have now."

I think you might have just answered your own question - for this time and the last.

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By *andycandy88Woman over a year ago

Northolt

OP can I ask why you would expect much success when you have made no effort with your profile and would expect a woman to sell her profile to gain your interest which is what would prompt you to message her ??

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By *hatBeardedChapMan over a year ago

Birmingham

I'd appreciate feedback on my profile..lord knows I need the help I've never been much good at waffling about myself thanks..honestly I don't bite THAT often

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

How do you measure success?

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By *pank the MonkeyCouple over a year ago

Fylde Coast

The answer is yes. Think clever not cock....

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By *use and wolfCouple over a year ago

angus

"Can single men be successful on here without going to organised social events or swinging clubs. "

The thing about attending clubs it introduces you to others in the scene and shows you are both who you say you are and genuine, so some people will insist on this step as a safety measure.

As an added bonus, if you make friends on the scene you are more likely to be invited to private parties

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Can single men be successful on here without going to organised social events or swinging clubs.

The thing about attending clubs it introduces you to others in the scene and shows you are both who you say you are and genuine, so some people will insist on this step as a safety measure.

As an added bonus, if you make friends on the scene you are more likely to be invited to private parties

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By *helroyCouple over a year ago

Skegness

we only meet single guys

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By *ust PeachyWoman over a year ago

Prestonish

"This is an interesting forum topic.

So firstly, as I believe others have said. You have to define success.

As we are all firstly taken by the way someone looks (oh don’t deny it

) this is simply life.

And we haven’t yet factored in the disparity in numbers. For every single woman or couples profile you’d have to conservatively estimate, say, 10?, 20? Single male profiles.

So what can be done about it.

Secondly it isn’t too difficult to write a profile that is formatted into three simple paragraphs:

Who are you?

Why are you here/what are you looking for?

What do you offer?

If you haven’t made some kind of an effort you’re not going to get noticed. It’s like being at a party and not saying hello to anyone. What did you think was going to happen?

And now for a breather, I really should shut up.

Great post!

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By *hogun300Man over a year ago

Dundee

Of course you can. But getting yourself to socials etc help. What doesn't help and never will is a blank profile. There is nothing to go on for anyone, your page is a chance to sell yourself. Blank pages like yourself often get deleted without being read.

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By *eroLondonMan over a year ago

Mayfair

•

I couldn't agree more. ^

This, in essence, is the crux of it. You can studiously construct the most pleasing of profiles with a montage of tasteful photographs, send a grammatically correct, hand-crafted introductory message and it will fester in the recipient's InBox like discarded confetti. The imbalance of women versus men plays a significant part on 'success'.

I've never been to a club and nor do I have any designs to. I started attending fab organised socials to make new friends. I haven't sent a first message in almost two years; my meets and encounters have been on the back of women messaging me...

And for the reprobate higher up in this thread who remarked "Stupid questions get stupid answers": it wasn't a stupid question. It takes some gumption for a man to post threads like these without getting lambasted.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If you have a true USP l, as a single guy, then I feel you can achieve a modicum of success without visiting clubs or attending socials etc.

By USP I mean being incredibly handsome or a body from the gods etc. Something that really makes you stand out.

If you don’t have these you can still get meets but I feel quite often you may need to put in a lot of effort. For most guys it’s the trade off here that seems to be the issue. Quite a lot of effort needed for a meet. They become disillusioned by this and then end up giving up or whinging…..

Just my $0.02 worth.

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By *AYENCouple over a year ago

Lincolnshire

Start with a name that doesn't sound like something a teenager would choose, follow that with a good profile pic, and finish with a good write up on your profile. Those three basic steps will put you way ahead of most.

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By *2000ManMan over a year ago

Worthing

Join in with forum/cam chat op. Get noticed and have a good sense of humour. You never know!

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By *odgerMooreMan over a year ago

Nowhere

Whoooaaaaa ….. a cock pic AND a message???

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By *rHotNottsMan over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

•

I couldn't agree more. ^

I don’t agree with this - people will and do respond if they want to. When your inbox is overloaded it’s because you’re choosing to ignore messages and so the ones on the top are more likely to get replied to than older ones. If they don’t and become old/unread just assume they were not interested enough to notice you. Maybe try again to be sure and then just accept it - they are not interested - and move on

I think guys who claim to write ‘perfectly crafted’ messages but keep getting ignored and have no success just because the women get too many messages are misguided.

It’s always the same story with whiners on here , they blame everyone but themselves

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By *entlemanrogueMan over a year ago

Barrhead

Of course you can be succesful. if ypu are respectful, confident and check your spelling/grammar when messaging (also dont copy paste your message, they can tell). tasteful pics help or pics that show what you are interested in.

i have been to one swingers club way back in 2015. yet i have met a few women over the years.

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By *entlemanrogueMan over a year ago

Barrhead

your profile is the reason why "

profile says, I will add more if i decide to stay. been a member 4 months, no new info, no pics.. i agree the profile is not helping.

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By *hilloutMan over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

Yes we can

(Sent Obama his royalty fee for using that phrase

)

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By *piderBunnyCouple over a year ago

Back of Nowhere and Beyond

"Yes we can

(Sent Obama his royalty fee for using that phrase

I always thought that was Bob the Builder's

Posh

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan over a year ago

Gloucestershire

I'm not in a clique, don't have a BBC (or BWC) just a LWC but, do have a positive attitude & love a good old laugh.

It's not all doom and gloom for single guys but, you just need to relax, put some effort in and realise it's not all about the sex.

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By *hilloutMan over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

"Yes we can

(Sent Obama his royalty fee for using that phrase

)

I always thought that was Bob the Builder's

Posh

Then Obama needs to send him a cheque

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You need a good profile, and you need to be a sensible, thoughtful human being with respect and kindness to the people you're trying to connect with. It needs to be a two-way street.

There are FAR too many people on here who are just on here to get laid - which is NOT what this site should be about.

It should have a community feel, and be about connecting with other people who you actually give a shit about - sadly it's become heavily weighted towards men trying to gain sexual gratification without giving a shit about other people or how they feel.

Entitled, lying, self aggrandising abusers are rife on here and it shows in peoples reactions towards the ones who do give a shit about who they share their time & attention with.

In short, it isn't about being 'successful' as you put it, OP - it's about finding people you click with. ie a two-way connection.

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By *riving_Home_For_MimiWoman over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

Clients?"

He's like the lad in that film... Leo Grande lol

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