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Things that you shouldn't say to a naked guy

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By *ovelybum OP Couple over a year ago

Tunbridge Wells

Ahh, it's cute.Why don't we just cuddle?

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By *ovelybum OP Couple over a year ago

Tunbridge Wells

This explains your car

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By *heekychezzaWoman over a year ago

warrington

no thanks - I'll smoke my own

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Like a real one .......... only smaller.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Fart .............................. give us a clue.

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By *uncouple981Couple over a year ago

ayrshire

Why don't you take your wrinkled vest off

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By *uitar_antiheroMan over a year ago

Glasgow

That's not even half the size of your dad's

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Where is it

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By *inktherapyCouple over a year ago

Gloucester

be unable to speak for laughing??

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Would you mind putting your clothes back on?

Thanks.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have all of them said to me. Should I give up lol

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By *ovelybum OP Couple over a year ago

Tunbridge Wells

All right, a treasure hunt

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Do the socks come off too? ................. all three of them.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Hang on......I'll get my bifocals.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Nice boob job..... Did you pay much for those?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My wife has one of them but bigger

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By *am123Man over a year ago

essex chelmsford

"This explains your car"
spits out drink thats funny

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By *aris23Woman over a year ago

France

Give me a nudge when it's woken up.

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By *ezebelWoman over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

That reminds me - must get some chipolatas...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I dont have any extra small condoms, here's a thimble.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I used to like walnut whips .......

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By *ougnrueCouple over a year ago

Dumfries

sorry i prefer men

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By *ovelybum OP Couple over a year ago

Tunbridge Wells

I hear excessive masturbation shrinks it.

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By *am123Man over a year ago

essex chelmsford

thought u had a pube there then u pissed out of it

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I hear excessive masturbation shrinks it. "

That would explain a problem I've been having then! I thought it had just shrunk with age.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If you cut the grass, you may be able to find it

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By *empting Devil.Woman over a year ago

Sheffield

What?!? You're a shower!!!

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By *icketysplitsWoman over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Roll over, I'll give you a massage.

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By *endoverbeckyWoman over a year ago

dublin

will i stick da heating on ur obviously freezin!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What do you mean "its shy"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"awwwwwwwwww"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Oh that reminds me we need some chipolatas!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It must be under one of the folds xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Does that come with an extension

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'll put my strap-on the other way wrong and make believe its you in there xx

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By *ovelybum OP Couple over a year ago

Tunbridge Wells

You must be a growing boy.

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By *ovelybum OP Couple over a year ago

Tunbridge Wells

"I'll put my strap-on the other way wrong and make believe its you in there xx "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

But I didn't ask for a TicTac

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By *iewMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

Don't worry, nibble on my tits and I will use my dildo instead....

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By *hole Lotta RosieWoman over a year ago

Deviant City

"This explains your car"

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By *hole Lotta RosieWoman over a year ago

Deviant City

wanna borrow my strapon?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

And now you know why i turned lesbian xx

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By *iewMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

Scrotum tuck for Christmas it is then

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Is your name Justin ?

My clit is bigger than that

Just aswell you have it pierced , Ill find it with my metal detector

Those crutchless panties just dont help xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Did Michael J Fox trim your pubes?

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By *icketysplitsWoman over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I didn't realise you were post op

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

No really - take it - I've got other bras.

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By *ovelybum OP Couple over a year ago

Tunbridge Wells

Eww, there's an inch worm on your thigh

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You look just like handsome smoocher

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Let's see what's on TV.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

that crack has definitely got bigger

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By *amschwingerzCouple over a year ago

West

'Are you cold?'

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By *rallvalCouple over a year ago

Dunfermline

It's like a penis only smaller.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Is that it

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have already eaten so need to provide cheese!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Is it in yet?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

*no!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Have you got a brother?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Oh dear I just came on, you'd best be off

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can you not wake me up when you're done

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By *ovelybum OP Couple over a year ago

Tunbridge Wells

Wow,and your feet are soo big

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Did you measure it in cm's by accident

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By *oulou45Woman over a year ago

Bucks

Got 1 better waitin at home

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By *ovelybum OP Couple over a year ago

Tunbridge Wells

Why don't we skip right to the cigarettes?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

pass ths wand

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

But it says VVWE on your profile ?

Are you related to Pinnochio because you better start telling lies soon

Is that toilet paper between your cheeks ?

Pass the port because i smell Stilton somewhere xx

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By *indylou47Woman over a year ago

BOLTON

I've seen more meat on a butchers pencil

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

have u ever done this before?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Ah, so thats where the eraser off my pencil went.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"'Are you cold?'"

Subtle but cuts like a knife

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Bet u can't

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Wow!!! Is that an elephant trunk? Or are you just pleased to see me!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Hang on while i grab the crackers

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