FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > You know you're gettin old when.....
You know you're gettin old when.....
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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You get an allotment
Modern music annoys you
Any other? |
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You need a piss after the first pint   |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A nice cuppa by the fire is more appealing than a fab meet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You get an allotment
Modern music annoys you
Any other?"
You walk Slow. |
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"You need a piss after the first pint
And it takes all night to do it……… "
See a doctor! |
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You make noises when sitting down, standing up, lifting things, putting things down, sleeping, concentrating.
Oh the noises. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Early nights, Chocolate Horlicks and Gold Radio  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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you get excited about a new hoover... Or a new bed!  Px |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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you get excited about a new hoover... Or a new bed! Px |
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By *oo..Woman
over a year ago
Boo's World |
You start to smell like mothballs/perfume.
What is it that the older generation use that smells like that? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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You have worthers originals in your pockets |
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"Early nights, Chocolate Horlicks and Gold Radio "
Would you like a spoon for your horlicks? |
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"You start to smell like mothballs/perfume.
What is it that the older generation use that smells like that? "
Hides the stench of piss |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Early nights, Chocolate Horlicks and Gold Radio
Would you like a spoon for your horlicks? "
Very good  |
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When you realise staying in is the new going out
Xx |
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By *YDB75Man
over a year ago
East Yorkie |
When you come on here because you cant remember what you should have been looking for…then later on you realise you have no milk and it was Asda shop you should have been doing |
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By *ipppyMan
over a year ago
Poole |
Spot your first grey pubic hair |
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By *BDYKCouple
over a year ago
Yarm |
You talk about something from your youth and then have to field questions from people who have no idea what said thing was; for example, cassettes and recording songs from the radio..!! |
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"Spot your first grey pubic hair"
Oh, bugger |
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[Removed by poster at 21/02/23 17:38:16] |
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By *exyMPCouple
over a year ago
SOUTHEND-ON-SEA |
"A nice cuppa by the fire is more appealing than a fab meet."
Oh that's just so sad. I'm sure that's not really the case |
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"A nice cuppa by the fire is more appealing than a fab meet.
Oh that's just so sad. I'm sure that's not really the case"
Hope not, or we're wasting our time here |
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When the nieces children who you used to babysit for, are out on the lash!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A nice cuppa by the fire is more appealing than a fab meet.
Oh that's just so sad. I'm sure that's not really the case"
It's true #transitions |
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"When the nieces children who you used to babysit for, are out on the lash!! "
Or your mate tries to chat them up  |
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Will let u know when get there! X |
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When I have to explain to a younger woman who John McEnroe is
I'm not that old yet!!! |
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When you have a shoe horn by the front door. |
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When you get to 51, and most of fab disappears from view  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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When you realise the first Harry Potter film was released 22 years ago |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You get up several times during the night to pee |
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You have to write everything down to avoid forgetting |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You reminisce about the price of things. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You have to write everything down to avoid forgetting "
You too then... |
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By *otsossieMan
over a year ago
local, but not too local |
Your joints sound like a bag of walnuts |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Prefer missionary position...  "
yes, my back now prefers missionary |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You make noises when sitting down, standing up, lifting things, putting things down, sleeping, concentrating.
Oh the noises."
Totally guilty. Billy Connolly did a great skit about exactly this. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When Nora says your bum doesn’t look the same these days… |
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... everyone annoys you and you start saying... 'I don't believe it!!! |
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By *osco78Man
over a year ago
Sheffield |
When you have a vinyl collection that you already bought on tape and cd.. |
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It takes you all night to do what you used to do all night ! |
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Seeing girls tottering around in high heels and short skirts with nothing on their legs and thinking they must be freezing lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When you make that noise when you’re getting out of bed |
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I will come back later when I remember. |
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"When you make that noise when you’re getting out of bed "
Or using furniture to help you get back off the floor lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When you take your pants off & your balls hit the floor.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A nice cuppa by the fire is more appealing than a fab meet.
Oh that's just so sad. I'm sure that's not really the case"
Why would it be sad? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Seeing girls tottering around in high heels and short skirts with nothing on their legs and thinking they must be freezing lol "
They'll get a chill in their kidneys |
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When you apologise to your doctor for making a mess in their office as they check your prostrate. She laughed and replied that she was glad I did, it was working properly.
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"You need a piss after the first pint "
When you can remember liquids being measured in pints... |
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By *nlysirMan
over a year ago
Nearby |
You have a favourite ring on the hob |
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By *.T.Man
over a year ago
Belfast |
When you realise something that you thought happened a year or so ago is actually several decades ago.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When can’t get a job anymore "
Ouch I felt that x |
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You look at a sunny day and think hang the washing out over beer garden weather |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When no one views your profile - or fabs a pic !! Must be an age thing?? |
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"When you get to 51, and most of fab disappears from view "
If it’s any consolation that happens to women too - just a couple of decades later!  |
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"When no one views your profile - or fabs a pic !! Must be an age thing??"
I fabbed every one that didn’t have a willy in it - so just the one!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You look at a sunny day and think hang the washing out over beer garden weather "
yes! |
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When you sit down and you accidently sit on your sac. |
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By *weetCruellaWoman
over a year ago
somewhere sweet and sour |
When you get up from the floor after half an hour wrapping presents and you walk like the alien from M.I.B lol that is so meeeee |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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When a spelling mistake on a forum topic header annoys you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When you use the words "in my day" |
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"When no one views your profile - or fabs a pic !! Must be an age thing??
I fabbed every one that didn’t have a willy in it - so just the one! "
our status is so that, thanks for confirming our thoughts ring true . |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"You get an allotment
Modern music annoys you
Any other?"
A) when you ask “are they still alive?”
B) when someone dies and the kids look at you cause they never heard of them!
Bonus points for both at the same time… I got that this week for Dickie Davies |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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[Removed by poster at 21/02/23 19:04:32] |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When you get to 51, and most of fab disappears from view
If it’s any consolation that happens to women too - just a couple of decades later! "
Wait till you hit 60 x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"you get excited about a new hoover... Or a new bed! Px"
I got excited about my shark hoover when I 1st had it  |
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"Prefer missionary position... yes, my back now prefers missionary "
Mine too...
Though occasionally get carried away & nearly dislocate my hips... |
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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago
Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro |
Look forward to taking my clothes off into Pjs. Old and single bliss |
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When you have a bed guard to help you in and out of bed because your hips gone |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You piss 5 times a night, and almost at the point of having to wear piss pads through the night |
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When you accidentally drop something on the floor and get down on your hands and knees to pick it up and look around to see if there are any other jobs you can do While you’re down there |
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"You get an allotment
Modern music annoys you
Any other?"
your feet seem further away when struggling to put your socks on your feet,, |
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When ur going to 50th &60 birthday party's and funerals |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"When you accidentally drop something on the floor and get down on your hands and knees to pick it up and look around to see if there are any other jobs you can do While you’re down there"
Made me laugh |
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By *avexxMan
over a year ago
cheshire |
when ibuprofen becomes part of your diet,, |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You know you are old when to visit the surgery for a nurse to give you a complimentary blood pressure check and it reads 184/112. You are put on meds immediately and buying a blood pressure machine fr Amazon so you can keep a diary so the doctor can keep an eye on if the meds are working Before I went in I felt fine with no symptoms what so ever. |
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When your memory goes
What was the question again |
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By *weetCruellaWoman
over a year ago
somewhere sweet and sour |
"You know you are old when to visit the surgery for a nurse to give you a complimentary blood pressure check and it reads 184/112. You are put on meds immediately and buying a blood pressure machine fr Amazon so you can keep a diary so the doctor can keep an eye on if the meds are working Before I went in I felt fine with no symptoms what so ever. "
Tbf, it's good it was identified hun. Xx |
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By *avexxMan
over a year ago
cheshire |
fab GP here surgery is now open,, |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Getting up from a seating position is an effort |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I honestly feel exactly the same fitness wise, but with a side of anxiety! Maybe I am finally old? 
I have meds to take twice a day. I am keeping a diary of my BP. I am having another medical exam next week, with a full spectrum of blood tests. For now the priority is to get the blood pressure down and then look for a cause.
Apparently this is relatively common for someone to be in this situation and not have any symptoms at all. That is, until it is too late.
The shock aside, I highly recommend to all the guys of our certain age to accept the routine checks offered by your GP. This was the first time I have been to a surgery in a decade, so not feeling sick is no excuse. Some things you can't just walk off. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Getting into your size 16 jeans is now classed as a slim day and you've started to stop feeling bad about it |
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"when ibuprofen becomes part of your diet,,"
Caution! Bad for the stomach long term. Have a chat with your doc about something better, or at least something that protect your stomach if you need it regularly. |
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When the police look like children |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When you spend more money on Werthers Originals than designer clothing |
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When nobody under 35 has heard of the A team, and they are your bosses ! |
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You make an inadvertent noise getting out of a bean bag chair
You look at a tea cozy and don’t immediately think about putting it on your head |
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By *arkus1812Man
over a year ago
Lifes departure lounge NN9 Northamptonshire East not West MidlandsMidlands |
When you have recently celebrated your 83rd birthday |
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When you get all kinds of goodies through the post, funeral plans, stool sample kits and saga brochures |
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When you can't touch your toes |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When your knees creak as you walk up the stairs |
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When your back aches getting into bed |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When you get on your knees to give oral and they have to help you back up after |
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[Removed by poster at 26/02/23 11:49:32] |
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Wish I could get an allotment had my name down 2 years x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have to Google what certain terms mean no cap |
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When you read a thread about how men love older women and you're out of the age range of the majority of contributors |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When you read a thread about how men love older women and you're out of the age range of the majority of contributors "
Bahahaha I feel your mirth |
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"When you read a thread about how men love older women and you're out of the age range of the majority of contributors
Bahahaha I feel your mirth"
I often read
'i love older women, the older the better'
Upper age limit 45 |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
You make “you know you’re getting old threads”!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The doctors start looking so incredibly young... |
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You fill out an online form and when it comes to date of birth, you have to scroll and scroll and scroll until yours shows up.
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Going to a rock club, and listening to sings you bought on vinyl and seeing people rocking out to them that weren't born when you bought it. lol |
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When you start a conversation with back in my day or when I was younger |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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when your kids are now older than you were when you started work or when you got married or when... |
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"You get an allotment
Modern music annoys you
Any other?"
Oh - bugger |
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"You need a piss after the first pint
And it takes all night to do it………
See a doctor! "
First time I had to use the N.H.S. since I was 6! |
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You watch the Brits and haven't got a clue who half the bands are. |
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You keep hearing “omg mum you’re soooooo embarrassing” and you’ve literally no idea what you’ve done. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When the idea of a good Saturday night is pyjamas on, coco in hand watching your favourite detective series on ITV3 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You keep hearing “omg mum you’re soooooo embarrassing” and you’ve literally no idea what you’ve done. "
Hmm, I have one who has given up speaking to me cos of this.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When the barman takes a second to check your ID because your birth year starts with '19' |
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"When the barman takes a second to check your ID because your birth year starts with '19'"
Yeah I’m always getting asked for ID. It’s such a pain……. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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[Removed by poster at 26/02/23 12:45:41] |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When you're on a night out and you look for a seat so you can all sit down.
When you avoid the bars where music is blasting loudly as you want to hear what your friends are saying to you. |
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When you can't count the tablets you take on one hand |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When you buy your first garden chairs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You keep hearing “omg mum you’re soooooo embarrassing” and you’ve literally no idea what you’ve done. "
Nah, you know you're really, really getting old when your kids start expressing appreciation for you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When you start creaking when you move haha!
Or when you suddenly remember a song thinking it was from about 3/4 years ago and realise it’s from 15 years ago!
Oh, and when the eldest child is turning 18 this year
Mrs |
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"When you can't count the tablets you take on one hand"
I could count twelve tablets on one hand whilst using the other hand to move the tablets from one place to another.
Thankfully I don't have to, even for a week's worth of tablets, but the skill is available for all of us. I learned it from an East African Asian. Not sure which race discovered the technique, though.I find it a useful one. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When you post on this thread... |
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"When you start creaking when you move haha!
Or when you suddenly remember a song thinking it was from about 3/4 years ago and realise it’s from 15 years ago!
Oh, and when the eldest child is turning 18 this year
Mrs"
Eldest child is now 20. Bollocks |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
You have to run to the toilet first thing in the morning rather than power walk. And just before you go into the loo you have to stop and hold the door frame and cross your legs to stop a dribble.
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"You have to run to the toilet first thing in the morning rather than power walk. And just before you go into the loo you have to stop and hold the door frame and cross your legs to stop a dribble.
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If you were that old, you would have worn a pad all night to deal with the the dribble! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When the barman takes a second to check your ID because your birth year starts with '19'
Yeah I’m always getting asked for ID. It’s such a pain……."
Are you old enough to be on this site young madam?  |
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You fancy lunch at the garden centre. |
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Athletes that you are absolutely sure only broke on to the international scene a few years ago are retiring. And then you realise the few years in questions is actually about 12 years |
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Losing weight takes forever, instead of cutting down to four pints on a friday, 8 on a saturday.
Finding any excuse not to go out on the bike, were before I would find a reason to get out on the bike.
I have to ice my knees for a week after playing paintball/airsoft for half a day. |
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When you make the same noises getting out of bed, that you used to make someone else make whilst in bed!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When you fancy the lollypop lady |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When your inhaler qualifies as a sex aid. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When you think about air frying ideas more than sex. I don't do that |
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When You and your teeth don’t sleep together |
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By *avexxMan
over a year ago
cheshire |
"When You and your teeth don’t sleep together "
,, made me laugh,, |
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When your programmed car radio stations are now kisstory, smooth fm and greatest hits radio |
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When you hear a song that you feel is still quite new and realise it's over 30 years old |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When you tell Alexa to play a song and everyone looks at you like you're a corpse |
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It takes you a week to recover from a game of squash |
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By *pank the MonkeyCouple
over a year ago
Down the Rabbit Hole and Round the Corner |
"When your programmed car radio stations are now kisstory, smooth fm and greatest hits radio "
Hang on you've forgotten classic fm |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When you tell Alexa to play a song and everyone looks at you like you're a corpse "
When you forget 'Alexa's' name and can't stop it playing |
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If you creak like an old barn door when you get out of bed |
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New recruits were born in the 2000's and you realise you are old enough to be their mum! |
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"New recruits were born in the 2000's and you realise you are old enough to be their mum!"
Bet you can still teach them a thing or 2 though |
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You go Aaaahhhhhhh and exhale while getting up from a low armchair |
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Also when you need an angle grinder to trim your toe nails |
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When you fart when you stand but look at others because you didn’t know it was you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When you fart when you stand but look at others because you didn’t know it was you "
Thought women didn’t fart |
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"When you fart when you stand but look at others because you didn’t know it was you
Thought women didn’t fart "
Well, I wasn’t talking about me |
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When you hanker for some of the things from the last century. |
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When you don't put socks on in winter coz you can't bend down to get them on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When you don't put socks on in winter coz you can't bend down to get them on "
When you take your socks off at night by standing on the toe of one and pulling your foot out that way (thereby avoiding the need to bend down) |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
When you're outside absolutely everyone's age range on fab |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
You find yourself starting posts like “Who remembers lard and coal sandwiches” or “You know you're gettin old when.....” |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
When you'd prefer to have lunch with someone on fab rather than a quick cup of coffee |
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By *opman121Man
over a year ago
stoke on trent |
Splash of brut and ready to go lol |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
When people that work with you know your name and you can't remember theirs
When you love listening to Leonard Cohen live in Dublin On spotify |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
You wake up delighted that you got up and out of bed before you have your morning pee
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When you start talking about the weather |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
When you saw all your favorite 80's bands live the first time around rather than retro festivals |
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When a knee trembler was once a
favourite stand up fuck position and nowdays is a orthapeadic condition |
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When you still own a Walkman (and it works still) |
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By *og-ManMan
over a year ago
somewhere |
When you remember everything closing on Christmas day
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"When you don't put socks on in winter coz you can't bend down to get them on
When you take your socks off at night by standing on the toe of one and pulling your foot out that way (thereby avoiding the need to bend down)"
I do that with my trousers as well but because I am lazy.
I can still reach my toes to trim and paint* the nails myself and put socks on unaided so I'm not doing too badly in the flexibility league.
*You know you are getting old when your toenails can only bear public exposure with artificial pearlescence!
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When I mention Grange Hill and few people go what?????? (Best show ever growing up) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ttfn |
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