"Tell me about it, you have no idea how hard it is to find someone to bark like a dog whilst shitting on my chest..
Sigh.
Funny you should say that...  "
I can't bark but I can howl like a dog. Guess that's a deal breaker?   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Tell me about it, you have no idea how hard it is to find someone to bark like a dog whilst shitting on my chest..
Sigh."
They'll be someone out there, there's always someone
Miss S x |
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By *.T.Man
over a year ago
Gloucester |
Try getting a disinterested handjob from a nail technician called Kylie who, whilst smoking a roll up, is on the phone to Keeley about her mum's new partner being a creep and how she's going to move out eventually, but Wayne (her boyfriend, not the mums) is a total commitment phobe, despite being babydaddy to Yvonne (pronounced Whyvoney) yet she thinks he still has a side chick who, if Kylie finds out who it is, will shank her.
Preferably in a nail parlour that reeks of acetone and broken dreams. |
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"Try getting a disinterested handjob from a nail technician called Kylie who, whilst smoking a roll up, is on the phone to Keeley about her mum's new partner being a creep and how she's going to move out eventually, but Wayne (her boyfriend, not the mums) is a total commitment phobe, despite being babydaddy to Yvonne (pronounced Whyvoney) yet she thinks he still has a side chick who, if Kylie finds out who it is, will shank her.
Preferably in a nail parlour that reeks of acetone and broken dreams."
This is quite similar to the conversation I heard when I had to use the bus last week |
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By *.T.Man
over a year ago
Gloucester |
"Try getting a disinterested handjob from a nail technician called Kylie who, whilst smoking a roll up, is on the phone to Keeley about her mum's new partner being a creep and how she's going to move out eventually, but Wayne (her boyfriend, not the mums) is a total commitment phobe, despite being babydaddy to Yvonne (pronounced Whyvoney) yet she thinks he still has a side chick who, if Kylie finds out who it is, will shank her.
Preferably in a nail parlour that reeks of acetone and broken dreams.
This is quite similar to the conversation I heard when I had to use the bus last week "
If you overhear it again, point her my way |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Try getting a disinterested handjob from a nail technician called Kylie who, whilst smoking a roll up, is on the phone to Keeley about her mum's new partner being a creep and how she's going to move out eventually, but Wayne (her boyfriend, not the mums) is a total commitment phobe, despite being babydaddy to Yvonne (pronounced Whyvoney) yet she thinks he still has a side chick who, if Kylie finds out who it is, will shank her.
Preferably in a nail parlour that reeks of acetone and broken dreams."
Good to see you back Jeremy Kyle. |
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"Try getting a disinterested handjob from a nail technician called Kylie who, whilst smoking a roll up, is on the phone to Keeley about her mum's new partner being a creep and how she's going to move out eventually, but Wayne (her boyfriend, not the mums) is a total commitment phobe, despite being babydaddy to Yvonne (pronounced Whyvoney) yet she thinks he still has a side chick who, if Kylie finds out who it is, will shank her.
Preferably in a nail parlour that reeks of acetone and broken dreams.
This is quite similar to the conversation I heard when I had to use the bus last week
If you overhear it again, point her my way "
Have some earplugs ready because you can hear her a mile away   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Tell me about it, you have no idea how hard it is to find someone to bark like a dog whilst shitting on my chest..
Sigh."
Oi, make up your mind. You asked me to purr like a kitten. |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Try getting a disinterested handjob from a nail technician called Kylie who, whilst smoking a roll up, is on the phone to Keeley about her mum's new partner being a creep and how she's going to move out eventually, but Wayne (her boyfriend, not the mums) is a total commitment phobe, despite being babydaddy to Yvonne (pronounced Whyvoney) yet she thinks he still has a side chick who, if Kylie finds out who it is, will shank her.
Preferably in a nail parlour that reeks of acetone and broken dreams.
This is quite similar to the conversation I heard when I had to use the bus last week
If you overhear it again, point her my way
Have some earplugs ready because you can hear her a mile away "
Did you get a bus tug though? 
A |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Tell me about it, you have no idea how hard it is to find someone to bark like a dog whilst shitting on my chest..
Sigh.
Oi, make up your mind. You asked me to purr like a kitten."
I'm inclusive, all animals matter. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Tell me about it, you have no idea how hard it is to find someone to bark like a dog whilst shitting on my chest..
Sigh.
Oi, make up your mind. You asked me to purr like a kitten.
I'm inclusive, all animals matter."
But there was no need to ghost me just because i couldn't 'poo on demand'.
I get stage fright |
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"Try getting a disinterested handjob from a nail technician called Kylie who, whilst smoking a roll up, is on the phone to Keeley about her mum's new partner being a creep and how she's going to move out eventually, but Wayne (her boyfriend, not the mums) is a total commitment phobe, despite being babydaddy to Yvonne (pronounced Whyvoney) yet she thinks he still has a side chick who, if Kylie finds out who it is, will shank her.
Preferably in a nail parlour that reeks of acetone and broken dreams.
This is quite similar to the conversation I heard when I had to use the bus last week
If you overhear it again, point her my way
Have some earplugs ready because you can hear her a mile away
Did you get a bus tug though?
A"
I didn't on that occasion |
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By *ustaman OP Man
over a year ago
weymouth |
"Try getting a disinterested handjob from a nail technician called Kylie who, whilst smoking a roll up, is on the phone to Keeley about her mum's new partner being a creep and how she's going to move out eventually, but Wayne (her boyfriend, not the mums) is a total commitment phobe, despite being babydaddy to Yvonne (pronounced Whyvoney) yet she thinks he still has a side chick who, if Kylie finds out who it is, will shank her.
Preferably in a nail parlour that reeks of acetone and broken dreams.
This is quite similar to the conversation I heard when I had to use the bus last week
If you overhear it again, point her my way
Have some earplugs ready because you can hear her a mile away
Did you get a bus tug though?
A
I didn't on that occasion "
New deviation on a bus wanker |
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Sorry to hijack the thread but are there any couples that would meet a guy. Looking for a woman that would let me squirt spray cream up her ass and fuck it while I recite Sir Winston Churchill’s ww2 speeches while her husband stands in the corner dressed as Super Ted in a kilt and Scottish 1740’s battle dress playing baby shark on the bagpipes.
No weirdo’s |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Tell me about it, you have no idea how hard it is to find someone to bark like a dog whilst shitting on my chest..
Sigh.
Oi, make up your mind. You asked me to purr like a kitten.
I'm inclusive, all animals matter.
But there was no need to ghost me just because i couldn't 'poo on demand'.
I get stage fright"
I understand that but your suggestion of me dressing up as a litter tray was just too much to ask for. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Tell me about it, you have no idea how hard it is to find someone to bark like a dog whilst shitting on my chest..
Sigh.
Oi, make up your mind. You asked me to purr like a kitten.
I'm inclusive, all animals matter.
But there was no need to ghost me just because i couldn't 'poo on demand'.
I get stage fright
I understand that but your suggestion of me dressing up as a litter tray was just too much to ask for."
...but you were still happy to rub catnip all over your balloon-knot??
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