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By *urvySub87 OP Woman
over a year ago
Near Wellingborough |
I'm shy at the best of times but since the birth of my son 7 months ago I have gained so much weight. I don't feel attractive and it makes me question how others can find me attractive when I don't (not after being told I'm pretty).
How do you get over body issues if you have them? Yes i know diet will help in the long run but it doesn't help now. I really want to be having fun when I can but being self conscious is really getting in the way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling. 7 months is nothing at all! It takes a long time to regain confidence - just be kind to yourself. A few extra pounds / stone is not a big deal. You just birthed an entire human! |
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By *urvySub87 OP Woman
over a year ago
Near Wellingborough |
"I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling. 7 months is nothing at all! It takes a long time to regain confidence - just be kind to yourself. A few extra pounds / stone is not a big deal. You just birthed an entire human! "
I'm bigger now than when I gave birth  |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
By not giving a fuck about what other people may think about you and instead prioritising what you feel about yourself.
.
Also realising that someones physical appeal does not prevent them from being absolute garbage people, and that who you are is more important than what you look like. |
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By *rtyIanMan
over a year ago
Gateway to the Beacons |
When you look in the mirror
The mirror of self doubt
The reflection of you looking at me
You have that feeling of not being enough
Flawed by society the media your peer
You feel not worthy not fitting their design
They tell you that you need this and that to shine
When that reflection looks back at you
Tell it you love it that’s it the best you
Self love we’re told is vanity and ego
Learn to love yourself as you love others
You’re worth it all and so much more
Love your self to the core
If you can not love yourself with no fear
Then how can you love those you hold dear
Forget the bullshit that you don’t fit
Ignore that blemish stray hair or zit
Society tells us how we should be
It’s bullishit and lies that feeds wet eyes
Wipe those tears and say to yourself
I am enough for me and for you
The you is your inner self l
Self love self care make them be
The number one thing top priority |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Be gentle on your self and try not to compare yourself to others , I personally love the curves of a mum body, but understand why you would feel self conscious.
Give your self time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling. 7 months is nothing at all! It takes a long time to regain confidence - just be kind to yourself. A few extra pounds / stone is not a big deal. You just birthed an entire human!
I'm bigger now than when I gave birth "
Try to stop the negative self thoughts and replace them with things like your being a good mum etc
Do one small thing a day to help you move forward to where ever you want to be life’s a marathon not a sprint x |
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I'm not sure you really get over them. I've tried and failed.
But what I do do is do things that help my confidence. Which for me means going to dance class once a week. And making sure I have well fitting underwear. These things will vary from person to person, but I think it's important to start small and work from there
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OP you look great!! Your pictures are sexy and show you off really well.
Fab can be a fickle place and not everyone will fancy you (I’m sure no one needs me to tell them that). If they aren’t interested in you its likely to be down to individual personal preference.
If anyone isn’t interested in you just because of your weight then stuffem! (Not literally, I don’t think it’s allowed). There are thousands of people on here who look past that kind of thing. They’ll want to meet and spend time with you because you’re pretty, fun, sexy and have loads to offer.
Remember, for women this is a sellers market!! (Don’t actually sell it, also not allowed).
Go gettem girl!!!  |
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"I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling. 7 months is nothing at all! It takes a long time to regain confidence - just be kind to yourself. A few extra pounds / stone is not a big deal. You just birthed an entire human!
I'm bigger now than when I gave birth "
That happened with both mine. Had no time to look after myself, once the kids got into a better routine I lost it again |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No solid advice as I'm not the most self confident but just wanted to say hugs! You are so much more than just your image, you are a unique human & your inner sexy can show on the outside if you're having a great time.. As others say, be kind to yourself  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm shy at the best of times but since the birth of my son 7 months ago I have gained so much weight. I don't feel attractive and it makes me question how others can find me attractive when I don't (not after being told I'm pretty).
How do you get over body issues if you have them? Yes i know diet will help in the long run but it doesn't help now. I really want to be having fun when I can but being self conscious is really getting in the way. "
I was stick thin until I turned 30. Like....5'9" and 8 stone dripping wet. I was painfully shy and had massive self confidence issues, I still do now even though I've put enough weight/muscle on to think I look half decent. It took me a long time to be semi-happy with what I've got but I learned to say "Fuck you" to the world and not worry about what I perceived that other people were thinking of me |
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I spent a lot of time hating everything about me and my body.
When I needed to pull myself out of that space, I found one feature I didn't absolutely despise, one I could focus on as not too bad and could be dressed up to look okay with the right lighting and outfits. For me it was legs, which is an easy one. Even the most mediocre legs look fucken amazing in some fishnets and high heels. So I'd dress to show them off and distract from the rest of the hideousness. Once I had it settled in my head that at least that part was attractive, I could start working up to other parts that maybe weren't as bad as I was seeing them.
Don't get me wrong. I still hate my tits. But I'm still willing to show them off as part of the complete package, and I know now that while my body might not appeal to everyone, I look fucking good to me. |
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It took me 4 years to become happy enough with myself after giving birth to feel even remotely sexy.
Being a single parent is the hardest thing I've ever done and it completely absorbed me.
All I can suggest is to speak out to people in the same situation as you. To sound out any issues and problems. I made some lifetime friends from our local mums group
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling. 7 months is nothing at all! It takes a long time to regain confidence - just be kind to yourself. A few extra pounds / stone is not a big deal. You just birthed an entire human!
I'm bigger now than when I gave birth
That happened with both mine. Had no time to look after myself, once the kids got into a better routine I lost it again "
Similar. I was breastfeeding and always hungry heh. They tell you it helps to burn calories but it just made me always snack heh. Only when I stopped weight started coming off. It took 9 months to put on, it will take time to shed it too. It grew a life. Your body is amazing for that!
T |
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"I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling. 7 months is nothing at all! It takes a long time to regain confidence - just be kind to yourself. A few extra pounds / stone is not a big deal. You just birthed an entire human!
I'm bigger now than when I gave birth
That happened with both mine. Had no time to look after myself, once the kids got into a better routine I lost it again
Similar. I was breastfeeding and always hungry heh. They tell you it helps to burn calories but it just made me always snack heh. Only when I stopped weight started coming off. It took 9 months to put on, it will take time to shed it too. It grew a life. Your body is amazing for that!
T"
You’re not supposed to snack on them yourself   |
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Fake it til you make it, OP!
I'm constantly told I'm confident & carry myself well but on the inside I hate how big and out of shape my body is.
I was always pretty slim until illness hit in my early 30's and I still forget how big I am now.
What works for me is the wonderful folk here on FAB who like my photos & the guys I meet who genuinely find me attractive. For me, there's no better way of "owning it" than to have a gorgeous guy telling me I'm beautiful & wanting me.
Above all, be kind to yourself. Having a baby is such a stressful & life-changing thing. Love yourself  x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's not easy but practice being kind to yourself.
You've got to stop valuing yourself on your appearance. Your body doesn't define you. And you've got to learn to not give a fuck what others think. Maybe treat yourself to a few things that might help to give you a boost? Maybe a spa day, new lingerie, hair appointment, perfume etc.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling. 7 months is nothing at all! It takes a long time to regain confidence - just be kind to yourself. A few extra pounds / stone is not a big deal. You just birthed an entire human!
I'm bigger now than when I gave birth
That happened with both mine. Had no time to look after myself, once the kids got into a better routine I lost it again
Similar. I was breastfeeding and always hungry heh. They tell you it helps to burn calories but it just made me always snack heh. Only when I stopped weight started coming off. It took 9 months to put on, it will take time to shed it too. It grew a life. Your body is amazing for that!
T
You’re not supposed to snack on them yourself "
Too late.. 
It tastes good BTW.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sending you a hug.
Think of it this way , when you berate yourself or put yourself down, would you say that to your 5 year old self? No you wouldn't so why do it now.
I take compliments here with a pinch of salt as majority of them are bullshit.
Learning to accept our bodies and ourselves is one of the hardest thing to do but we need to do it. We get one body, we get one chance of life, need to be happy more!
( I've been feeling crap last few days, even writing that has reminded me to be happy )  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I see many ladies on here put on their profiles the words "I have flabby bits"
Childbirth is tbe most wonderful thing in the world, and it's you ladies who have to endure the pain of birth and the consequential body change
I for one admire, respect and am in awe of all of you.
Without you none of us would be here
I am sure you are just as attractive (if nor more so) than you was before the birth
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"I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling. 7 months is nothing at all! It takes a long time to regain confidence - just be kind to yourself. A few extra pounds / stone is not a big deal. You just birthed an entire human!
I'm bigger now than when I gave birth
That happened with both mine. Had no time to look after myself, once the kids got into a better routine I lost it again
Similar. I was breastfeeding and always hungry heh. They tell you it helps to burn calories but it just made me always snack heh. Only when I stopped weight started coming off. It took 9 months to put on, it will take time to shed it too. It grew a life. Your body is amazing for that!
T
You’re not supposed to snack on them yourself
Too late..
It tastes good BTW. "
Oh you bad girl!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm shy at the best of times but since the birth of my son 7 months ago I have gained so much weight. I don't feel attractive and it makes me question how others can find me attractive when I don't (not after being told I'm pretty).
How do you get over body issues if you have them? Yes i know diet will help in the long run but it doesn't help now. I really want to be having fun when I can but being self conscious is really getting in the way. "
When you say that you don't find yourself attractive and it makes you question how others can, I personally think there are lots and lots of us who feel that exact thing.
Hopefully you have friends and family close by to help you feel yourself
Hopefully you know how fab works and what it entails, if you meet and enjoy it don't listen to the bs someone may say just to play.
As for the diet and the here and now, unfortunately it can't be done but what can is to go out with your son, take him out in his buggy and go for long walks, it's good for him and for yourself, don't get me wrong I'm no fitness expert.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Take a few new photos and put them up here. I'll bet you get hundreds of fabs and lots of compliments.
Also don't be so hard on yourself. If you are being a good mum, then you probably won't have the time or energy to go mad dieting or excercising and that's okay too.
Be as kind to yourself as you would be to a friend. |
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