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4,000 words
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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..in English language to describe feelings. A little tidbit I found out about today. Most of us are familiar with approximately 200, but we primarily use very few of them (happy, angry, sad, confused, excited, disappointed etc.) and often focus on the negative ones, they get memorised in somewhat deeper way.
I won't ask you how you feel, it's been done to death.
I would like to ask how you would never want to feel again. What emotion would you not want to endure in the future, if you could make that choice?
I'll start with "disloyalty".
Let's do some soul cleansing.
T |
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I wouldn't lose any of them, I have had heartbreak but it reminds me of how much I loved someone. If I felt nothing it would devalue that love. You need the lows to truly appreciate the highs and make you work to avoid it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't lose any of them, I have had heartbreak but it reminds me of how much I loved someone. If I felt nothing it would devalue that love. You need the lows to truly appreciate the highs and make you work to avoid it."
Valid point too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"..in English language to describe feelings. A little tidbit I found out about today. Most of us are familiar with approximately 200, but we primarily use very few of them (happy, angry, sad, confused, excited, disappointed etc.) and often focus on the negative ones, they get memorised in somewhat deeper way.
I won't ask you how you feel, it's been done to death.
I would like to ask how you would never want to feel again. What emotion would you not want to endure in the future, if you could make that choice?
I'll start with "disloyalty".
Let's do some soul cleansing.
T"
I don’t see how disloyalty is a feeling. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't lose any of them, I have had heartbreak but it reminds me of how much I loved someone. If I felt nothing it would devalue that love. You need the lows to truly appreciate the highs and make you work to avoid it.
Valid point too. "
I disagree.
If you’ve experienced death of a loved one, how do I grow experiencing that feeling over and over . |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't lose any of them, I have had heartbreak but it reminds me of how much I loved someone. If I felt nothing it would devalue that love. You need the lows to truly appreciate the highs and make you work to avoid it.
Valid point too.
I disagree.
If you’ve experienced death of a loved one, how do I grow experiencing that feeling over and over ."
You can heh. He is talking about heartbreak not grief. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sorrow.
I am living with it now, and I know there will be a time it will happen again with someone else I care deeply for. I don't think it gets any worse than sorrow. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"..in English language to describe feelings. A little tidbit I found out about today. Most of us are familiar with approximately 200, but we primarily use very few of them (happy, angry, sad, confused, excited, disappointed etc.) and often focus on the negative ones, they get memorised in somewhat deeper way.
I won't ask you how you feel, it's been done to death.
I would like to ask how you would never want to feel again. What emotion would you not want to endure in the future, if you could make that choice?
I'll start with "disloyalty".
Let's do some soul cleansing.
T
I don’t see how disloyalty is a feeling. "
The emotions caused by it are specific to me and not ones I I to pour out; I am not an emotional exhibitionist.
I could write feeling sad or betrayed due to disloyalty but I didn't. To break it down for you: 'I do not want to endure feelings caused by someone being disloyal to me'. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't lose any of them, I have had heartbreak but it reminds me of how much I loved someone. If I felt nothing it would devalue that love. You need the lows to truly appreciate the highs and make you work to avoid it.
Valid point too.
I disagree.
If you’ve experienced death of a loved one, how do I grow experiencing that feeling over and over .
You can heh. He is talking about heartbreak not grief. "
If you reread the thread , you’ll clearly see he said ‘feelings’ . Your apology accepted |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't lose any of them, I have had heartbreak but it reminds me of how much I loved someone. If I felt nothing it would devalue that love. You need the lows to truly appreciate the highs and make you work to avoid it.
Valid point too.
I disagree.
If you’ve experienced death of a loved one, how do I grow experiencing that feeling over and over .
You can heh. He is talking about heartbreak not grief.
If you reread the thread , you’ll clearly see he said ‘feelings’ . Your apology accepted "
I see clearly. I also see clearly his example. Which you omitted.
Oh dear. I have nothing to offer you. Definitely not an apology 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"..in English language to describe feelings. A little tidbit I found out about today. Most of us are familiar with approximately 200, but we primarily use very few of them (happy, angry, sad, confused, excited, disappointed etc.) and often focus on the negative ones, they get memorised in somewhat deeper way.
I won't ask you how you feel, it's been done to death.
I would like to ask how you would never want to feel again. What emotion would you not want to endure in the future, if you could make that choice?
I'll start with "disloyalty".
Let's do some soul cleansing.
T
I don’t see how disloyalty is a feeling.
The emotions caused by it are specific to me and not ones I I to pour out; I am not an emotional exhibitionist.
I could write feeling sad or betrayed due to disloyalty but I didn't. To break it down for you: 'I do not want to endure feelings caused by someone being disloyal to me'."
To help me understand a little better. Because the feelings of disloyalty can include : loss (of friendship), being cheated upon, being lied to. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't lose any of them, I have had heartbreak but it reminds me of how much I loved someone. If I felt nothing it would devalue that love. You need the lows to truly appreciate the highs and make you work to avoid it.
Valid point too.
I disagree.
If you’ve experienced death of a loved one, how do I grow experiencing that feeling over and over .
You can heh. He is talking about heartbreak not grief.
If you reread the thread , you’ll clearly see he said ‘feelings’ . Your apology accepted
I see clearly. I also see clearly his example. Which you omitted.
Oh dear. I have nothing to offer you. Definitely not an apology
"
You’re welcome to remain wrong. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Sorrow.
I am living with it now, and I know there will be a time it will happen again with someone else I care deeply for. I don't think it gets any worse than sorrow."
Hugs LBC and everyone in a similar position. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Rage.
I don’t like who I become when I am full of rage.
The loss of control ?
Quite the apposite. I become quite determined and don’t care who I hurt.  "
I always value your raw honesty when it comes to self analysing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lots. Inadequate, incapable, grief, unsafe, belittled, objectified, humiliated and probably many more.
Unsafe. How could I forget that. "
Hope you are ok x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Lots. Inadequate, incapable, grief, unsafe, belittled, objectified, humiliated and probably many more.
Unsafe. How could I forget that.
Hope you are ok x"
Ah thats kind. Yes I haven't felt safer in a long time. Building good boundaries helped. And you too.. its a powerful list. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lots. Inadequate, incapable, grief, unsafe, belittled, objectified, humiliated and probably many more.
Unsafe. How could I forget that.
Hope you are ok x
Ah thats kind. Yes I haven't felt safer in a long time. Building good boundaries helped. And you too.. its a powerful list. "
. Feel free to PM x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm not sure if I would want or not want to be it, again.... But emotionless... I quite liked it tbh"
Do you want to elaborate ? I'm curious. Is it about not dealing with too much ? Easier if there is little going on in feelings department and you detach yourself a little ? |
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"Rumination
That can be distressing. "
Very much so. My weird brain still has regrettable comments and conversations in it from years ago. It stops me sleeping well and concentrating on good things in my life.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I wish I didn't have to feel envy again, as it has been a massive blocker to potentially enjoyable experiences in my life. It's the one thing I would get rid of without hesitation  "
Envy is just one of the emotions we go through. It's not as self destructive as jealousy I feel. Sometimes can be motivating too? I am sorry you feel it blocked you from enjoying things. Do you think it will ever change ? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Rumination
That can be distressing.
Very much so. My weird brain still has regrettable comments and conversations in it from years ago. It stops me sleeping well and concentrating on good things in my life.
"
Letting go is an art indeed. Or maybe not art.. hard learnt skill? You can get attached to replaying those scenarios so much that as you said you can't enjoy Today. Maybe it's worth thinking of forgiving oneself ?
T |
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Hmm had a ponder over this one, and despite not wanting to feel helpless or scared or anything like that again. I'm kinda ok with it if I do. That only thing I never want to feel again is nothing, to feel is to be alive. |
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"Hmm had a ponder over this one, and despite not wanting to feel helpless or scared or anything like that again. I'm kinda ok with it if I do. That only thing I never want to feel again is nothing, to feel is to be alive. "
As above. I spent an entire year completely shut down and not feeling anything.
When that broke and all the negative feelings surged it felt amazing to feel anything at all. The positive ones that came later were better of course.
So another vote for the worst being to feel nothing. |
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"I wouldn't lose any of them, I have had heartbreak but it reminds me of how much I loved someone. If I felt nothing it would devalue that love. You need the lows to truly appreciate the highs and make you work to avoid it.
Valid point too.
I disagree.
If you’ve experienced death of a loved one, how do I grow experiencing that feeling over and over ."
It makes me focus on loving and appreciating the people that are still with me. |
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"Rumination
That can be distressing.
Very much so. My weird brain still has regrettable comments and conversations in it from years ago. It stops me sleeping well and concentrating on good things in my life.
Letting go is an art indeed. Or maybe not art.. hard learnt skill? You can get attached to replaying those scenarios so much that as you said you can't enjoy Today. Maybe it's worth thinking of forgiving oneself ?
T"
I completely agree and it’s a skill I haven’t learned! I find that talking about things really helps me compartmentalise them. Can’t wait to get home to Oxfordshire/Surrey to see friends again!
This wonderful, supportive, funny, friendly community on fab helps |
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