FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Manners.
Manners.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Manners are a two way street. I see so many profiles demanding “gentleman” and “nice guys” but there’s a high level of bad mannered lady’s out there. I get it, you lady’s get a lot of
messages but is that enough reason to be rude?
What’s everyone’s thoughts on this? TIA x |
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"Manners are a two way street. I see so many profiles demanding “gentleman” and “nice guys” but there’s a high level of bad mannered lady’s out there. I get it, you lady’s get a lot of
messages but is that enough reason to be rude?
What’s everyone’s thoughts on this? TIA x "
No thoughts as you have t given me enough detail yet.
How are they rude? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hi Tia!
The problem is that it isn't a two way street for some people. Some have Give Way signs up, others No Entry.
You've got to follow your own Highway Code in life. If you remember to look both ways when crossing these people, you can't go far wrong. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Manners are a two way street. I see so many profiles demanding “gentleman” and “nice guys” but there’s a high level of bad mannered lady’s out there. I get it, you lady’s get a lot of
messages but is that enough reason to be rude?
What’s everyone’s thoughts on this? TIA x
No thoughts as you have t given me enough detail yet.
How are they rude? "
Literally receiving rude replies, or even just a profile been very rude. I just don’t get it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hi Tia!
The problem is that it isn't a two way street for some people. Some have Give Way signs up, others No Entry.
You've got to follow your own Highway Code in life. If you remember to look both ways when crossing these people, you can't go far wrong."
Absolutely love that mate!! |
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I was debating this the other day with a friend, and we came to the conclusion that its purely because some just don't want to. We live with an online world with throw away words aimed at other people on a regular basis, all we can do is try to protect ourselves from it |
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"Manners are a two way street. I see so many profiles demanding “gentleman” and “nice guys” but there’s a high level of bad mannered lady’s out there. I get it, you lady’s get a lot of
messages but is that enough reason to be rude?
What’s everyone’s thoughts on this? TIA x
No thoughts as you have t given me enough detail yet.
How are they rude?
Literally receiving rude replies, or even just a profile been very rude. I just don’t get it. "
See the positive in their reply/profile. Block and move on |
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I get told I'm rude fairly often.
Most people get a polite no thanks. I appreciate I don't sugar coat but I find it better to be up front.
If someone indicates they're not interested in your attentions and you persist anyway I think it's perfectly reasonable to be a little shorter than necessary.
But I am a prickly bitch. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I was debating this the other day with a friend, and we came to the conclusion that its purely because some just don't want to. We live with an online world with throw away words aimed at other people on a regular basis, all we can do is try to protect ourselves from it"
It’s terribly sad that some can forget all about morals and manners just because we’re not face to face. It’s a little like road rage in the sense people get a lot angrier because they are in the comfort of their own space so will literally say anything. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Manners are a two way street. I see so many profiles demanding “gentleman” and “nice guys” but there’s a high level of bad mannered lady’s out there. I get it, you lady’s get a lot of
messages but is that enough reason to be rude?
What’s everyone’s thoughts on this? TIA x "
Manners aren’t a two way street. You do not need to lower your standards because someone else has. That’s just a race to the (ahem) ….. bottom.
Just be selective with who you interact with.
C |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I get told I'm rude fairly often.
Most people get a polite no thanks. I appreciate I don't sugar coat but I find it better to be up front.
If someone indicates they're not interested in your attentions and you persist anyway I think it's perfectly reasonable to be a little shorter than necessary.
But I am a prickly bitch."
I completely understand if they are persisting. It’s when people are rude straight off the bat that I don’t understand. |
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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago
Not all that North of North London |
I think manners and politeness are things in life where we definitely shouldn't give to receive.
I'm generally polite but can be incredibly blunt too.
If I find people are rude or lacking in manners it may change how I interact with them but it won't influence how I communicate with others.
Sone women on here can be rude, as van men, but it won't influence my behaviour |
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"I completely understand if they are persisting. It’s when people are rude straight off the bat that I don’t understand. "
I feel it would be disingenuous for me to present as sunshine and rainbows, when the people I care about most get the same level of snark and sass, just with some adoration involved.
I'm probably more polite to the people that absolutely don't interest me for the sake of reducing hassle. But I don't intend to soften my approach any more than I already do. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Manners maketh the man. 
Good manners cost me nothing and I’ll still use them. They’ll never know if they delete unread my messages in a polite way …..  part of me understands the womens struggles but another part of me thinks treat people as individuals, because we all are. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi Tia!
The problem is that it isn't a two way street for some people. Some have Give Way signs up, others No Entry.
You've got to follow your own Highway Code in life. If you remember to look both ways when crossing these people, you can't go far wrong."
Excellent |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I completely understand if they are persisting. It’s when people are rude straight off the bat that I don’t understand.
I feel it would be disingenuous for me to present as sunshine and rainbows, when the people I care about most get the same level of snark and sass, just with some adoration involved.
I'm probably more polite to the people that absolutely don't interest me for the sake of reducing hassle. But I don't intend to soften my approach any more than I already do."
“Snark and sass” absolutely love that haha
Thanks for the input. I definitely think it’s more important to be nice to people you don’t know as obviously the people you do know have a level of understanding for your sense of humor. |
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Manners are an easy thing for me. But then I was brought up to know they cost nothing and I don’t ever have to be rude to be me.
I’m not sure everyone was though by some of the disgraceful messages I receive from people online, hiding behind a phone screen.
I’m very polite in the use of the delete button and sometimes even by responding with a smarcasm.
But they do say you make your own karma in this life and mine is just peachy
 |
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"Hi Tia!
The problem is that it isn't a two way street for some people. Some have Give Way signs up, others No Entry.
You've got to follow your own Highway Code in life. If you remember to look both ways when crossing these people, you can't go far wrong."
Nice analogy. Where do we do the theory test? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi Tia!
The problem is that it isn't a two way street for some people. Some have Give Way signs up, others No Entry.
You've got to follow your own Highway Code in life. If you remember to look both ways when crossing these people, you can't go far wrong.
Nice analogy. Where do we do the theory test? "
Halifax. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Manners maketh the man.
Good manners cost me nothing and I’ll still use them. They’ll never know if they delete unread my messages in a polite way ….. part of me understands the womens struggles but another part of me thinks treat people as individuals, because we all are. "
Your right manners cost nothing only problem is a lot of people here have moral outlooks that's tighter then a ducks arse and only think they should receive. |
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"I was debating this the other day with a friend, and we came to the conclusion that its purely because some just don't want to. We live with an online world with throw away words aimed at other people on a regular basis, all we can do is try to protect ourselves from it
It’s terribly sad that some can forget all about morals and manners just because we’re not face to face. It’s a little like road rage in the sense people get a lot angrier because they are in the comfort of their own space so will literally say anything. "
Yes. False bravado is so common, it's like poking at people with sticks, but they would never dare say anything up close and personal. I think that's where the most harm is done tbh, When thry are sickly sweet infront of people, but rotten to the core when nobody's watching |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Maybe if you saw some of the messages we get, you'd understand why we don't feel the need to be polite!"
I totally get that but why would you let some Neanderthal affect who you are as a person? |
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"Maybe if you saw some of the messages we get, you'd understand why we don't feel the need to be polite!
I totally get that but why would you let some Neanderthal affect who you are as a person? "
One neanderthal - no problem.
One neanderthal a day - meh, but still not bad.
One neanderthal every hour - now that's something that makes most women get their guards way up.
Personally I feel like reading a profile and having basic manners of not attaching a penis to every single message is uncalled for any rudeness, but if someone obviously doesn't see me as a human being and only see me as a set of shaved holes to put a penis into - darn right I'll be as rude as they come.
Many question why I'm so rude to them too - which my answer always is "would you like your mother to be treated the way you treat women in their inbox" - that either turns to "no, I'm sorry" or "but this is a seeeeexxxxxx siiiiiite" |
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"manners" mean very different things to different people. Whilst we don't need to fall out with folks with different manners to ours. They exist to help us all rub along in our shared world, a little bit better... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Maybe if you saw some of the messages we get, you'd understand why we don't feel the need to be polite!
I totally get that but why would you let some Neanderthal affect who you are as a person?
One neanderthal - no problem.
One neanderthal a day - meh, but still not bad.
One neanderthal every hour - now that's something that makes most women get their guards way up.
Personally I feel like reading a profile and having basic manners of not attaching a penis to every single message is uncalled for any rudeness, but if someone obviously doesn't see me as a human being and only see me as a set of shaved holes to put a penis into - darn right I'll be as rude as they come.
Many question why I'm so rude to them too - which my answer always is "would you like your mother to be treated the way you treat women in their inbox" - that either turns to "no, I'm sorry" or "but this is a seeeeexxxxxx siiiiiite" "
So basically the moral of the story is there is a lot of morons on fab.
Something I will need to keep in mind. X |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Travelling |
"Maybe if you saw some of the messages we get, you'd understand why we don't feel the need to be polite!"
Which is totally understandable to a point, it's not an entirely valid reason to project that out to everyone.
For anyone that I have messaged and has spoken to me knows that my messages or any part of my attitude is definitely not deserving of some of the rudeness and hostile responses I have had over the years, by a small minority granted, but it exists none the less.
I don't expect all friendly and happy responses, I don't expect any response, but if you choose to respond don't come at me with the same attitude that you give to the disrespectful messages.
I've shown a polite respectful attitide, that doesn't mean that same attitude needs to be returned equally, but in no way should it be meet with disrespect and a rude attitude because you are pissed off at those that show you disrespect and their messages.
Some people have a blunt and cold nature to them, that's fine. That is different to blatant rudeness and hostilities though. There is a middle ground that should be default - for some it just never is.
**"you" is the general you, not you personally. |
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"Maybe if you saw some of the messages we get, you'd understand why we don't feel the need to be polite!
I totally get that but why would you let some Neanderthal affect who you are as a person?
One neanderthal - no problem.
One neanderthal a day - meh, but still not bad.
One neanderthal every hour - now that's something that makes most women get their guards way up.
Personally I feel like reading a profile and having basic manners of not attaching a penis to every single message is uncalled for any rudeness, but if someone obviously doesn't see me as a human being and only see me as a set of shaved holes to put a penis into - darn right I'll be as rude as they come.
Many question why I'm so rude to them too - which my answer always is "would you like your mother to be treated the way you treat women in their inbox" - that either turns to "no, I'm sorry" or "but this is a seeeeexxxxxx siiiiiite"
So basically the moral of the story is there is a lot of morons on fab.
Something I will need to keep in mind. X"
There is a LOT of morons indeed  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Maybe if you saw some of the messages we get, you'd understand why we don't feel the need to be polite!
Which is totally understandable to a point, it's not an entirely valid reason to project that out to everyone.
For anyone that I have messaged and has spoken to me knows that my messages or any part of my attitude is definitely not deserving of some of the rudeness and hostile responses I have had over the years, by a small minority granted, but it exists none the less.
I don't expect all friendly and happy responses, I don't expect any response, but if you choose to respond don't come at me with the same attitude that you give to the disrespectful messages.
I've shown a polite respectful attitide, that doesn't mean that same attitude needs to be returned equally, but in no way should it be meet with disrespect and a rude attitude because you are pissed off at those that show you disrespect and their messages.
Some people have a blunt and cold nature to them, that's fine. That is different to blatant rudeness and hostilities though. There is a middle ground that should be default - for some it just never is.
**"you" is the general you, not you personally. "
Absolutely spot on mate |
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"Maybe if you saw some of the messages we get, you'd understand why we don't feel the need to be polite!
Which is totally understandable to a point, it's not an entirely valid reason to project that out to everyone.
For anyone that I have messaged and has spoken to me knows that my messages or any part of my attitude is definitely not deserving of some of the rudeness and hostile responses I have had over the years, by a small minority granted, but it exists none the less.
I don't expect all friendly and happy responses, I don't expect any response, but if you choose to respond don't come at me with the same attitude that you give to the disrespectful messages.
I've shown a polite respectful attitide, that doesn't mean that same attitude needs to be returned equally, but in no way should it be meet with disrespect and a rude attitude because you are pissed off at those that show you disrespect and their messages.
Some people have a blunt and cold nature to them, that's fine. That is different to blatant rudeness and hostilities though. There is a middle ground that should be default - for some it just never is.
**"you" is the general you, not you personally. "
What do you do with those who bypass your profile, don't care what you're looking for and don't care if they meet your preferences but send you a nice polite generic message that out of context wouldn't look rude or bad, but when you look at a bigger picture you realise they are completely disrespecting your choice of preferences 
Are you allowed to be impolite/blunt with them or do we still need to wrap things in cotton wool to avoid hurt feelings? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Manners are a two way street. I see so many profiles demanding “gentleman” and “nice guys” but there’s a high level of bad mannered lady’s out there. I get it, you lady’s get a lot of
messages but is that enough reason to be rude?
What’s everyone’s thoughts on this? TIA x "
Perhaps have a nice smile on your profile pic and not a dick pic ? |
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I agree manners are very important and there’s little need to be unnecessararily rude, however, it depends what you are classing as rude, OP?
It’s not rude to ignore or delete a message, for example.
It’s not rude to be blunt and sharp with someone if they message you again when you’ve told them you’re not interested.
It’s not rude to tell someone to f*ck off if they’ve sent you a message that is vulgar or abusive.
It is rude (in my opinion) to message someone without reading their bio to check if you fit what they’re looking for.
It is rude to repeatedly message with no reply
It is rude to send someone a message that is vulgar or crude without an invitation |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Travelling |
"What do you do with those who bypass your profile, don't care what you're looking for and don't care if they meet your preferences but send you a nice polite generic message that out of context wouldn't look rude or bad, but when you look at a bigger picture you realise they are completely disrespecting your choice of preferences
Are you allowed to be impolite/blunt with them or do we still need to wrap things in cotton wool to avoid hurt feelings? "
Blunt is very different to hostile. But why bother responding to that message in the first place. Block and delete. As I said, no response is needed, it is a site "rule" is it not?
Yes, they may have disrespected your preferences fair enough, but you then choose to to retaliate and take it up to a new level with your own impolite and hostilities.
You choose the violence and escelate it to that level. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I agree manners are very important and there’s little need to be unnecessararily rude, however, it depends what you are classing as rude, OP?
It’s not rude to ignore or delete a message, for example.
It’s not rude to be blunt and sharp with someone if they message you again when you’ve told them you’re not interested.
It’s not rude to tell someone to f*ck off if they’ve sent you a message that is vulgar or abusive.
It is rude (in my opinion) to message someone without reading their bio to check if you fit what they’re looking for.
It is rude to repeatedly message with no reply
It is rude to send someone a message that is vulgar or crude without an invitation "
I agree with all of the above 100 percent.
What I class as rude is someone who picks out physical appearance and then chooses a disgusting way of wording what they think of that persons appearance. I always read a profile first. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I've been called ignorant for not replying to messages before. But not everyone is going to want to speak to every person that messages, no? "
I think it’s perfectly ok to ignore a message.
Its the messages that go on a personal attack I have a problem with. |
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"Manners are a two way street. I see so many profiles demanding “gentleman” and “nice guys” but there’s a high level of bad mannered lady’s out there. I get it, you lady’s get a lot of
messages but is that enough reason to be rude?
What’s everyone’s thoughts on this? TIA x "
Have you drawn scatter graphs and produced spreadsheets ? Are the women who demand manners the same women that are rude ? |
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"What do you do with those who bypass your profile, don't care what you're looking for and don't care if they meet your preferences but send you a nice polite generic message that out of context wouldn't look rude or bad, but when you look at a bigger picture you realise they are completely disrespecting your choice of preferences
Are you allowed to be impolite/blunt with them or do we still need to wrap things in cotton wool to avoid hurt feelings?
Blunt is very different to hostile. But why bother responding to that message in the first place. Block and delete. As I said, no response is needed, it is a site "rule" is it not?
Yes, they may have disrespected your preferences fair enough, but you then choose to to retaliate and take it up to a new level with your own impolite and hostilities.
You choose the violence and escelate it to that level. "
I'm blunt with people I care for and call friends. That's just the way I am, why should I change myself to spare someone's feelings when they obviously don't care about mine?
Why reply?
1. There's thousands of threads where single men crying and moaning about not receiving replies, calling women rude and asking why.
2. Hopefully if enough people will reply with words like "read profiles BEFORE messaging" or something along the lines - something might just eventually click in the brain and at least one person will think to themselves "hang on a minute, maybe I would get a better response if read profiles before messaging and maybe people won't be so rude". Hopefully
Missus |
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"Maybe if you saw some of the messages we get, you'd understand why we don't feel the need to be polite!
I totally get that but why would you let some Neanderthal affect who you are as a person? "
Because at times, it's relentless. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"What do you do with those who bypass your profile, don't care what you're looking for and don't care if they meet your preferences but send you a nice polite generic message that out of context wouldn't look rude or bad, but when you look at a bigger picture you realise they are completely disrespecting your choice of preferences
Are you allowed to be impolite/blunt with them or do we still need to wrap things in cotton wool to avoid hurt feelings?
Blunt is very different to hostile. But why bother responding to that message in the first place. Block and delete. As I said, no response is needed, it is a site "rule" is it not?
Yes, they may have disrespected your preferences fair enough, but you then choose to to retaliate and take it up to a new level with your own impolite and hostilities.
You choose the violence and escelate it to that level.
I'm blunt with people I care for and call friends. That's just the way I am, why should I change myself to spare someone's feelings when they obviously don't care about mine?
Why reply?
1. There's thousands of threads where single men crying and moaning about not receiving replies, calling women rude and asking why.
2. Hopefully if enough people will reply with words like "read profiles BEFORE messaging" or something along the lines - something might just eventually click in the brain and at least one person will think to themselves "hang on a minute, maybe I would get a better response if read profiles before messaging and maybe people won't be so rude". Hopefully
Missus "
I always read a profile, why would I message someone who’s looking for a man who’s 7 foot, heavily tattooed with massive cock.
I personally like to try and find someone I can have a genuine connection with.
I completely understand that not all are the same. |
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"Manners are a two way street. I see so many profiles demanding “gentleman” and “nice guys” but there’s a high level of bad mannered lady’s out there. I get it, you lady’s get a lot of
messages but is that enough reason to be rude?
What’s everyone’s thoughts on this? TIA x "
Depends what your classing as rude?
No reply = not rude |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Manners are a two way street. I see so many profiles demanding “gentleman” and “nice guys” but there’s a high level of bad mannered lady’s out there. I get it, you lady’s get a lot of
messages but is that enough reason to be rude?
What’s everyone’s thoughts on this? TIA x "
There is a very high level of bad manners ladies which they deserve what they get  |
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"I agree manners are very important and there’s little need to be unnecessararily rude, however, it depends what you are classing as rude, OP?
It’s not rude to ignore or delete a message, for example.
It’s not rude to be blunt and sharp with someone if they message you again when you’ve told them you’re not interested.
It’s not rude to tell someone to f*ck off if they’ve sent you a message that is vulgar or abusive.
It is rude (in my opinion) to message someone without reading their bio to check if you fit what they’re looking for.
It is rude to repeatedly message with no reply
It is rude to send someone a message that is vulgar or crude without an invitation
I agree with all of the above 100 percent.
What I class as rude is someone who picks out physical appearance and then chooses a disgusting way of wording what they think of that persons appearance. I always read a profile first."
That's extremely unkind |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Travelling |
"What do you do with those who bypass your profile, don't care what you're looking for and don't care if they meet your preferences but send you a nice polite generic message that out of context wouldn't look rude or bad, but when you look at a bigger picture you realise they are completely disrespecting your choice of preferences
Are you allowed to be impolite/blunt with them or do we still need to wrap things in cotton wool to avoid hurt feelings?
Blunt is very different to hostile. But why bother responding to that message in the first place. Block and delete. As I said, no response is needed, it is a site "rule" is it not?
Yes, they may have disrespected your preferences fair enough, but you then choose to to retaliate and take it up to a new level with your own impolite and hostilities.
You choose the violence and escelate it to that level.
I'm blunt with people I care for and call friends. That's just the way I am, why should I change myself to spare someone's feelings when they obviously don't care about mine?
Why reply?
1. There's thousands of threads where single men crying and moaning about not receiving replies, calling women rude and asking why.
2. Hopefully if enough people will reply with words like "read profiles BEFORE messaging" or something along the lines - something might just eventually click in the brain and at least one person will think to themselves "hang on a minute, maybe I would get a better response if read profiles before messaging and maybe people won't be so rude". Hopefully
Missus "
As I said bluntness (which applies to you telling them to read profiles) is different. We are talking about rude, disrespectful, and hostile responses. None of which you said comes even close to that. Simple telling them to read profiles etc that is blunt, not rude. If you then apply anything above that in terms of hostilities, you then are the one escelating things for no reason other than you want to be.
It's not about hurt feelings, my feelings don't get hurt by it, I just wonder was there any fucking need for that attitude and then move on. Tag them as a red flag and go about my day.
This whole thing is an entitlement arms race. Retaliation being the aim of the game. Very much "a woman scorned" type attitude that is then applied to every man out there with or without being provoked.
There are some "vile 'orrible cunts" out there, some of them are women. I know because I've experienced it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"What do you do with those who bypass your profile, don't care what you're looking for and don't care if they meet your preferences but send you a nice polite generic message that out of context wouldn't look rude or bad, but when you look at a bigger picture you realise they are completely disrespecting your choice of preferences
Are you allowed to be impolite/blunt with them or do we still need to wrap things in cotton wool to avoid hurt feelings?
Blunt is very different to hostile. But why bother responding to that message in the first place. Block and delete. As I said, no response is needed, it is a site "rule" is it not?
Yes, they may have disrespected your preferences fair enough, but you then choose to to retaliate and take it up to a new level with your own impolite and hostilities.
You choose the violence and escelate it to that level.
I'm blunt with people I care for and call friends. That's just the way I am, why should I change myself to spare someone's feelings when they obviously don't care about mine?
Why reply?
1. There's thousands of threads where single men crying and moaning about not receiving replies, calling women rude and asking why.
2. Hopefully if enough people will reply with words like "read profiles BEFORE messaging" or something along the lines - something might just eventually click in the brain and at least one person will think to themselves "hang on a minute, maybe I would get a better response if read profiles before messaging and maybe people won't be so rude". Hopefully
Missus
As I said bluntness (which applies to you telling them to read profiles) is different. We are talking about rude, disrespectful, and hostile responses. None of which you said comes even close to that. Simple telling them to read profiles etc that is blunt, not rude. If you then apply anything above that in terms of hostilities, you then are the one escelating things for no reason other than you want to be.
It's not about hurt feelings, my feelings don't get hurt by it, I just wonder was there any fucking need for that attitude and then move on. Tag them as a red flag and go about my day.
This whole thing is an entitlement arms race. Retaliation being the aim of the game. Very much "a woman scorned" type attitude that is then applied to every man out there with or without being provoked.
There are some "vile 'orrible cunts" out there, some of them are women. I know because I've experienced it. "
Again I completely agree. What I’ve got tired of is the double standards. So just wanted to put it out there. Thank you for you’re input x |
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Technology and the Internet has in many ways eroded manners and ruined the ability of many people to communicate.
Not just on fab but everywhere things are taken out of context. Some are highly critical when expressing opinions and offence is taken when opinions differ. Everyone is entitled to an opinion.
Most of this stems from a lack of face to face interaction with people outside of their own circle. Lots of people won't even answer the phone.
As for fab and the preferences of individuals,these are sometimes open to interpretation. Everyone sees themselves and others in a different way. If someone genuinely feels they fit your preferences why shouldn't they contact you. Before all this existed if people didn't try their luck a lot of couples wouldn't exist. |
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By *host63Man
over a year ago
Bedfont Feltham |
"Manners are a two way street. I see so many profiles demanding “gentleman” and “nice guys” but there’s a high level of bad mannered lady’s out there. I get it, you lady’s get a lot of
messages but is that enough reason to be rude?
What’s everyone’s thoughts on this? TIA x "
I agree with you OP reading some.of ladies profiles that are demanding and rude is an eye-opener and definitely a turn off. |
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I would like to put my 2 cents in. I think manners should be across the board. Some of the messages I've received and I know even some guys have received are foul.
There was 1 like I saw red, and I was a dick. Major dick. I'd had a day of abuse from various people on fab and then got a message from a guy being pushy and had clearly not read my profile and I lost it. It was a bad moment.
I'm sure others have seen red for a moment. I don't think that make me a bad person, entirely. And I felt bad after.
I think it can be easy for everyone to become scorned on here and hard to take a step back when needed at times.
However, I don't think being abusive to someone's looks etc is every the right way to go. There is no excuse for darn right nasty messages to people with their insecurities. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I would like to put my 2 cents in. I think manners should be across the board. Some of the messages I've received and I know even some guys have received are foul.
There was 1 like I saw red, and I was a dick. Major dick. I'd had a day of abuse from various people on fab and then got a message from a guy being pushy and had clearly not read my profile and I lost it. It was a bad moment.
I'm sure others have seen red for a moment. I don't think that make me a bad person, entirely. And I felt bad after.
I think it can be easy for everyone to become scorned on here and hard to take a step back when needed at times.
However, I don't think being abusive to someone's looks etc is every the right way to go. There is no excuse for darn right nasty messages to people with their insecurities. "
Some very honest feed back, thank you.
And I hope you don’t mind me saying but I found you’re profile funny as fuck. The story’s at the dinner table been the best bit. |
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"I would like to put my 2 cents in. I think manners should be across the board. Some of the messages I've received and I know even some guys have received are foul.
There was 1 like I saw red, and I was a dick. Major dick. I'd had a day of abuse from various people on fab and then got a message from a guy being pushy and had clearly not read my profile and I lost it. It was a bad moment.
I'm sure others have seen red for a moment. I don't think that make me a bad person, entirely. And I felt bad after.
I think it can be easy for everyone to become scorned on here and hard to take a step back when needed at times.
However, I don't think being abusive to someone's looks etc is every the right way to go. There is no excuse for darn right nasty messages to people with their insecurities.
Some very honest feed back, thank you.
And I hope you don’t mind me saying but I found you’re profile funny as fuck. The story’s at the dinner table been the best bit. "
Thank you. Didn't realise though that they would believe my stories haha. I completely messed that bit up didn't I lol. |
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If I see a profile that I think is rude I'll pass it by and not engage at all.
Manners don't come into that equation because there is no interaction.
If I'm chatting to someone I'm always mannerly even if they aren't because if they are being directly abusive either on the forums or in private messages it usually winds them up even more when I don't rise to the bait.
Manners are subjective as well.
There is a fine line between being polite and mannerly and being a scyhophant. |
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Manners do work both ways and it's good manners to read a profile I think,sadly many don't.
So if someone doesn't read mine I won't respond ,if I can see they've made an effort and have read it ,I'll reply even if it's a no thanks.
I'm never rude unless someone was to me first. |
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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago
taunton somerset |
75% of my messages are porn scripts men saying what they want to do to me ..crude and yuk 20% are creepy false flattery type the darling hunny sexy puke type ..now im not going to answer them thats a str8 block and night night thats not rude ...
its simple if im interested ill answer if im not i wont those i answer im mostly polite to ther odd one or two ill get pissed off with ie the ones who rejoin to get around blocks ..
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Are they being rude, or just being assertive? Pretty much every woman I've spoken to on here gets so many messages that ignore their profiles, include unsolicited cock pics, and are generally crude, so the need for women have a need to be very clear about what they want and don't want. Some men see that as rudeness. |
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Expect respect and it's probably wise not to assume too personal an interpretation of what others should and should not do here. Assume your own rules for how you want to use the site, fully within the Fab terms and conditions that you have agreed to. Then continue.
Every time that we assume that we can make others behave as we do or want them to, it's myopic.
Trent others won respect. Report anyone who is not behaving appropriately. And get on with your life. |
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