FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Some men become jealous when another man so much as looks at his partner
Some men become jealous when another man so much as looks at his partner
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s the twinge of jealousy that drives it for me
I want to watch my boyfriend fuck someone else
But then I want to take him home and ride him like I stole him and make him forget all about them |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"Jealousy is an odd one. It hits everyone differently."
Yes. I also don't think it's always a negative thing. Or a big one. How it's handled by both parties is the most important thing isn't it? If it becomes weaponised, that's not healthy.
I sometimes get little flutters of that sort of feeling. Not sure if I'd apply jealousy to it because it's such an umbrella term for a wealth of emotions. But, I think, that with those I'm dating we're mature enough to discuss it, openly and without fear. Sometimes it's good to not voice it and just sit with it though. Realise it's not a permanent feeling. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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jealousy Has no place in the swinging world
It’s how things can turn nasty
Turn people away from it a bad experience could put someone off for life
And the last thing anyone needs is someone’s husband or boyfriend to get jealous mid way through and turn nasty
There was a forumite about a year and hafe ago that posted about such things happening
Got punched in the back off the head while mid thrust in someone wife because the husband thought it was a good idear to swing and didn’t like the reality off it
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"jealousy Has no place in the swinging world
It’s how things can turn nasty
Turn people away from it a bad experience could put someone off for life
And the last thing anyone needs is someone’s husband or boyfriend to get jealous mid way through and turn nasty
There was a forumite about a year and hafe ago that posted about such things happening
Got punched in the back off the head while mid thrust in someone wife because the husband thought it was a good idear to swing and didn’t like the reality off it
"
Whoah  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" jealousyHas no place in the swinging world
It’s how things can turn nasty
Turn people away from it a bad experience could put someone off for life
And the last thing anyone needs is someone’s husband or boyfriend to get jealous mid way through and turn nasty
There was a forumite about a year and hafe ago that posted about such things happening
Got punched in the back off the head while mid thrust in someone wife because the husband thought it was a good idear to swing and didn’t like the reality off it
Whoah "
Yip it’s things like that. That happing could turn people away for life hence why jealousy has no place in this world
If you feel the slightest bit off jealousy at all then this world isn’t for you
Your just putting other fun at risk and could crate a dangerous situation |
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By *glyBettyTV/TS
over a year ago
About 3 feet away from the fence |
"Got punched in the back off the head while mid thrust in someone wife because the husband thought it was a good idear to swing and didn’t like the reality off it
"
Good god. How did you react?
I don't think I would have been able to keep my composure. |
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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago
Peterborough |
"It’s the twinge of jealousy that drives it for me
I want to watch my boyfriend fuck someone else
But then I want to take him home and ride him like I stole him and make him forget all about them "
Great recovery sex then? |
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There’s no room for jealousy in the swinging world and there’s a big difference between sex and love .. as a couple it should be about adding a little extra if there is jealousy then maybe you shouldn’t be here ..
Although that I guess a little bit is human nature I can remember tappin my ex in the shoulder when I thought he had been fucking someone else for a bit too long and saying my fukkin turn now  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Got punched in the back off the head while mid thrust in someone wife because the husband thought it was a good idear to swing and didn’t like the reality off it
Good god. How did you react?
I don't think I would have been able to keep my composure."
Wasn’t me it was someone else who posted it round a year and hafe ago |
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"jealousy Has no place in the swinging world
It’s how things can turn nasty
Turn people away from it a bad experience could put someone off for life
And the last thing anyone needs is someone’s husband or boyfriend to get jealous mid way through and turn nasty
There was a forumite about a year and hafe ago that posted about such things happening
Got punched in the back off the head while mid thrust in someone wife because the husband thought it was a good idear to swing and didn’t like the reality off it
"
Least it wasn’t a donkey punch |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"jealousy Has no place in the swinging world
It’s how things can turn nasty
Turn people away from it a bad experience could put someone off for life
And the last thing anyone needs is someone’s husband or boyfriend to get jealous mid way through and turn nasty
There was a forumite about a year and hafe ago that posted about such things happening
Got punched in the back off the head while mid thrust in someone wife because the husband thought it was a good idear to swing and didn’t like the reality off it
Least it wasn’t a donkey punch "
Oooo god nope think I would flip if a guy done that one ha ha
I mean yes I am in to a light bit being slapped in the face with the right person but when I say light I mean light ha ha |
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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago
somerset |
jealousy has no place in this lifestyle as a couple you should be so in tune with each other and open with each other ... ie to swing as a couple you have a very strong relationship .. if not this lifestyle will rip you apart fast or slowly |
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More women get jealous than men. The possession drive is high, even in the swinging world.
There is a reason why mfm is more popular than fmf, takes a very special couple Indeed to share a husband, without her trying to get all of his attention. Or becoming stroppy because he is enjoying another women "too much". |
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Jealousy is one thing....but lashing out is another.
Anyone who feels jealousy that intensely should admit to themselves that there's nothing for them in the swinging scene, and bow out gracefully. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s a strange one. If we are out in the pub my husband wouldn’t like it if I was getting chatted up not so much as jealous just a time and place for it.
But when we are at a club he loves the attention I get. The sex for us afterwards is always amazing  |
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Jealousy is totally natural it's how you handle it that counts communication is key.
I enjoy seeing the Mr with another woman, I think the only thing I couldn't handle would be an emotional connection, sex is sex to me, we both enjoy it and share that enjoyment with others.
Mrs |
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"I don't understand this, why would anyone not want to see their spouse getting pleasure?
People are weird..."
Weird? Or different. I think it’s more weird how someone can get off watching someone they love fuck someone else. I’ll never understand that. Ever.
I respect what this site is though so most people won’t agree with me but I think away from this site they probably would. |
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"I don't understand this, why would anyone not want to see their spouse getting pleasure?
People are weird...
Weird? Or different. I think it’s more weird how someone can get off watching someone they love fuck someone else. I’ll never understand that. Ever.
I respect what this site is though so most people won’t agree with me but I think away from this site they probably would. "
Each to their own
Big difference between sex and love !!! |
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"I don't understand this, why would anyone not want to see their spouse getting pleasure?
People are weird...
Weird? Or different. I think it’s more weird how someone can get off watching someone they love fuck someone else. I’ll never understand that. Ever.
I respect what this site is though so most people won’t agree with me but I think away from this site they probably would.
Each to their own
Big difference between sex and love !!! "
Absolutely there is. Which is totally my point.
A fwb, no problem. Someone I love, no. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think jealousy is a perfectly valid emotion and addressing it is probably healthier than pretending it doesn't exist . As a single person I've experienced it and it'd not an issue.
I think it must take an incredibly strong relationship to enter this lifestyle as a couple and I admire people who have that.
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I got into it with my partner because we fantasised about it and then we decided to do it.
We had really good open communication, which definitely helped.
Jealousy just gave way to compersion.
The emotional connection aspect is the bit that's challenging, I reckon. Sharing love is very different to sharing sex. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't think jealousy is always a bad thing, it can teach us things about ourselves and our relationships if we choose look at the reasons behind it. In past relationships, pre-swinging, I've had pangs when a relationship isn't secure, when I've not been getting what I need from it. I've had pangs when the relationship is secure, but I've had low self-esteem and feel inferior. Both situations were big motivators to pull my big girl pants up and make changes.
Now, when I see my partner with someone else, I feel joyful. Is that weird? I think it might be weird  . And mightily turned on. Anyway, I adore it, for whatever reason.
Nell
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"I don't think jealousy is always a bad thing, it can teach us things about ourselves and our relationships if we choose look at the reasons behind it. In past relationships, pre-swinging, I've had pangs when a relationship isn't secure, when I've not been getting what I need from it. I've had pangs when the relationship is secure, but I've had low self-esteem and feel inferior. Both situations were big motivators to pull my big girl pants up and make changes.
Now, when I see my partner with someone else, I feel joyful. Is that weird? I think it might be weird . And mightily turned on. Anyway, I adore it, for whatever reason.
Nell
"
That sounds so familiar!
See now I feel a little envy at your relationship because I lost my partner.
But I am grinning like a Cheshire cat because I am really happy for you. |
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It's an emotion and controlling those emotions can be very difficult. What some people struggle with is balancing that emotion. That's why you need to communicate. Where it sometimes breaks down is a lack of fairness or perceived fairness. We play with men because that pang of jealousy turns me on and I can control it. We don't play with women because D doesn't like seeing me be intimate with others which is fine.
We have two friends who are a couple. He gets arsey every time she goes out for a drink with work colleagues and other men are there, he thinks they're just going to try it on with her all night.
He went out last week for drinks with three other women and didn't see why his Mrs might ask a question about it or query it.
They're definitely not swingers 
They don't have the emotional maturity to cope with it. |
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"It's an emotion and controlling those emotions can be very difficult. What some people struggle with is balancing that emotion. That's why you need to communicate. Where it sometimes breaks down is a lack of fairness or perceived fairness. We play with men because that pang of jealousy turns me on and I can control it. We don't play with women because D doesn't like seeing me be intimate with others which is fine.
We have two friends who are a couple. He gets arsey every time she goes out for a drink with work colleagues and other men are there, he thinks they're just going to try it on with her all night.
He went out last week for drinks with three other women and didn't see why his Mrs might ask a question about it or query it.
They're definitely not swingers
They don't have the emotional maturity to cope with it. "
The emotional maturity to cope with being a swinger.
Love how we really do all look at things so differently. The beauty of forums, opinions and conversations. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My ex husband was pathologically jealous
It destroyed our relationship "
I know the feeling too, if the partner feeling jealous doesn't address it and even worse blame you instead, there's nothing you can do
Retroactive jealousy and relationship obsessive compulsive disorder can be very toxic and destructive |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Don’t you dare try to say or try to give the impression that a swinging couple is more special than one which commits themselves to each other!!!
Your wording is atrocious.
A couple that can be happy is one that found respect for each other and nothing will waver their love no matter what.  |
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"Don’t you dare try to say or try to give the impression that a swinging couple is more special than one which commits themselves to each other!!!
Your wording is atrocious.
A couple that can be happy is one that found respect for each other and nothing will waver their love no matter what. "
Exactly this. Must admit the emotional maturity bit did make me laugh out loud. I actually typed a long response then thought meh fuck it I really cannot be arsed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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F asked, we agreed on terms and flexibility etc, first MMF nearly broke my mind which is why we'll never look for a single guy unless he wants to help me explore my bi side which is difficult cause I don't always fancy that kind of thing. She now wants to explore with a woman more and as odd as it sounds I don't get any sexual gratification from watching her with a man, woman or other. Nor do I have any desire to sleep with other people currently |
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"Don’t you dare try to say or try to give the impression that a swinging couple is more special than one which commits themselves to each other!!!
Your wording is atrocious.
A couple that can be happy is one that found respect for each other and nothing will waver their love no matter what. "
Cheers for the lecture Pops but if you take a wander back through the comment you'll find that actually what I said was the different emotional responses to simply going out for a drink with a member of the opposite sex makes it difficult to imagine they would entertain the world of ethical non monogamy, swinging and sharing partners.
I didn't one up anyone, I didn't say anyone was more special.
They're our closest friends and we love them dearly. |
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"Don’t you dare try to say or try to give the impression that a swinging couple is more special than one which commits themselves to each other!!!
Your wording is atrocious.
A couple that can be happy is one that found respect for each other and nothing will waver their love no matter what.
Exactly this. Must admit the emotional maturity bit did make me laugh out loud. I actually typed a long response then thought meh fuck it I really cannot be arsed. "
Thanks for joining in though. |
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"Don’t you dare try to say or try to give the impression that a swinging couple is more special than one which commits themselves to each other!!!
Your wording is atrocious.
A couple that can be happy is one that found respect for each other and nothing will waver their love no matter what.
Exactly this. Must admit the emotional maturity bit did make me laugh out loud. I actually typed a long response then thought meh fuck it I really cannot be arsed.
Thanks for joining in though. "
No problem at all. |
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I make everybody jealous. I'm not even having sex with them and they get jealous if I turn my attention elsewhere.
Girls just stop talking to me if they get a whiff of someone elses affections. Or if I don't play up to them.
Guys just end up wanting to fuck me not knowing why but get jealous of my partner because 'they' must be gettn it and they're not.
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"It's an emotion and controlling those emotions can be very difficult. What some people struggle with is balancing that emotion. That's why you need to communicate. Where it sometimes breaks down is a lack of fairness or perceived fairness. We play with men because that pang of jealousy turns me on and I can control it. We don't play with women because D doesn't like seeing me be intimate with others which is fine.
We have two friends who are a couple. He gets arsey every time she goes out for a drink with work colleagues and other men are there, he thinks they're just going to try it on with her all night.
He went out last week for drinks with three other women and didn't see why his Mrs might ask a question about it or query it.
They're definitely not swingers
They don't have the emotional maturity to cope with it. "
Nearly spat my tea out at this. We have some very close lifelong friends exactly like this.
Whenever we go out separately they question us as to why we don't get jealous. I'll be diplomatic, where as mick just says. " grow up" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Don’t you dare try to say or try to give the impression that a swinging couple is more special than one which commits themselves to each other!!!
Your wording is atrocious.
A couple that can be happy is one that found respect for each other and nothing will waver their love no matter what.
Cheers for the lecture Pops… "
You are welcome.
Thanks for the Pops remark.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I thought my husband was dating another woman and giving her quality time and sharing emotions, that would really bother me. I know he would never do that though.
To share him sexually, no jealousy issues at all. It's purely hot, horny and exciting. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't understand this, why would anyone not want to see their spouse getting pleasure?
People are weird...
Weird? Or different. I think it’s more weird how someone can get off watching someone they love fuck someone else. I’ll never understand that. Ever.
I respect what this site is though so most people won’t agree with me but I think away from this site they probably would. "
Why would you not want to see someone you love getting pleasure? I'm sorry but this is a perspective I will never understand. Ever. |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I don't understand this, why would anyone not want to see their spouse getting pleasure?
People are weird...
Weird? Or different. I think it’s more weird how someone can get off watching someone they love fuck someone else. I’ll never understand that. Ever.
I respect what this site is though so most people won’t agree with me but I think away from this site they probably would.
Why would you not want to see someone you love getting pleasure? I'm sorry but this is a perspective I will never understand. Ever."
You don't need to understand it though. It isn't wrong to feel that way, as it isn't wrong to feel the way you feel. |
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"I don't understand this, why would anyone not want to see their spouse getting pleasure?
People are weird...
Weird? Or different. I think it’s more weird how someone can get off watching someone they love fuck someone else. I’ll never understand that. Ever.
I respect what this site is though so most people won’t agree with me but I think away from this site they probably would.
Why would you not want to see someone you love getting pleasure? I'm sorry but this is a perspective I will never understand. Ever."
Don’t be sorry. We’re all different. Which is a good thing, be boring if we were all the same. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I actually have a cheating fetish. If Kitty told me she’d fucked someone on a night out or at work I’d be so turned on! "
This
I actually want Autumn to go on a night out, come home all dishevelled but insist nothing happened. Then later in the week I hear from her pal that she got snu snu.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m not a jealous person - unless I’m in the luteal phase of my menstrual cycle 
In fact I have no interest in swinging / sharing my husband in these two weeks (probably about a week and half )
The two weeks before ovulation though ……  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I can't imagine being in previous a relationship and saying.. "go on babe have sex with John"
I just can't imagine doing it and I guess the reaction would he a bad one. On the other hand if I met someone who was already into it, I would encourage it. Just not anyone who I've been with. |
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