FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Be patient or bide my time?
Be patient or bide my time?
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By *ommyTigh OP Man
over a year ago
Edinburgh |
Was chatting to someone recently where the chat got steamy very quickly and initial plan to meet for sex was made. This then cooled down and a social meet was planned instead. Social meet was great with a cheeky but full on kiss.
A new sex meet was planned. Since the social chat pretty much ceased and now said meet has been postponed.
We both work and have a family so real life is very real.
Am I being too hasty thinking they’ve lost interest but are just being polite? How do I handle it? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think if you are patient things will go fine but I find impatience doesn't work for as real life gets in the way  "
This. Even if things have changed now, not to say they would be different in the future! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe they changed their mind. Maybe they are busy.
Not a lot you can do if they won't sort another meet.  "
Yep. If I feel unsure, I put the ball in their court. I’m convinced I leave anyone knowing where I stand, but I can’t do the pestering. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"... people loose interest here fast..
maybe call it?
I think they may have lost interest. How do I call it without blowing it (just in case)?"
I'd ask her out again giving a date... if you dont get a reply shes clearly lost interest, if you get a sorry cant without a counter date - she's lost interest.
good luck |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe they changed their mind. Maybe they are busy.
Not a lot you can do if they won't sort another meet.
Yep. If I feel unsure, I put the ball in their court. I’m convinced I leave anyone knowing where I stand, but I can’t do the pestering. "
Same. I let them know I'm up for it and to shout me when they're free. |
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By *red333Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"Was chatting to someone recently where the chat got steamy very quickly and initial plan to meet for sex was made. This then cooled down and a social meet was planned instead. Social meet was great with a cheeky but full on kiss.
A new sex meet was planned. Since the social chat pretty much ceased and now said meet has been postponed.
We both work and have a family so real life is very real.
Am I being too hasty thinking they’ve lost interest but are just being polite? How do I handle it?"
yes, move on  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yeah, kinda tired of it so we end up thanking them for wasting our time. That's why we just go to clubs and put up a status a day or two before we go so if someone is there. Then we can have a chat and play.
A lot of conversations initiated by others with a meet in mind have slowly died over a day or two. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Was chatting to someone recently where the chat got steamy very quickly and initial plan to meet for sex was made. This then cooled down and a social meet was planned instead. Social meet was great with a cheeky but full on kiss.
A new sex meet was planned. Since the social chat pretty much ceased and now said meet has been postponed.
We both work and have a family so real life is very real.
Am I being too hasty thinking they’ve lost interest but are just being polite? How do I handle it?"
Play it cool Trigg, play it cool |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Liverpool |
Long ago I stopped doing the chasing game.
I don't mind waiting a good while before a meet if that needs to be the case, I'm not impatient in that way. Life and moods get in the way. That's fair enough.
However if their effort in to conversation drops suddenly with the minimum effort responses for more than a few days at most and without any kind of explanation, then I just stop contact myself and not bother further. I assume they lost interest.
That applies to here, and just friends in general. |
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By *evonrobMan
over a year ago
Kingsbridge |
Patience certainly doesn’t seem to be at a premium on here! I’ve had extremely steamy chats over a number of hours reduce to zero overnight. That actually seems the norm. Probably shouldn’t be surprised but it does feel like instant gratification is more important than the planning, anticipation and eventual meet which is what really makes life on here so enjoyable! |
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"... people loose interest here fast..
maybe call it?
I think they may have lost interest. How do I call it without blowing it (just in case)?"
You don't. Just leave them to it, if they want to, they'll be in touch. |
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"... people loose interest here fast..
maybe call it?
I think they may have lost interest. How do I call it without blowing it (just in case)?
You don't. Just leave them to it, if they want to, they'll be in touch."
Couldn't agree more with this.
OP - I have been on fab for years and have had some wonderful meets. Every single one was because I was patient and not pushy, it comes across as quietly confident and undesperate, empowering people to make un-pressured decisions.
I inadvertently tested this recently with someone on fab and blew it because I was too pushy.
I'd suggest a) they've lost interest, in which case - preserve your dignity! Or b) life got in the way and, while they occasionally get time for sexy chat/meets, it's hard to juggle. If she wants to, she'll tap you up for a meet.
In either case, I'd suggest chalking this one up to the fab crap chute and finding someone else. Good luck, whatever happens! |
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you’ll only find out if you ask. Because if you don’t she could be thinking the exact same thing as you are. 
