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Can you really....
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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Yes definitely. I felt for a long time there was something wrong with me for even entertaining ideas that I might be poly.
Now I'm very happy and secure in the knowledge that I can love more than one person at a time. Or at least have strong feelings for another, I wouldn't say it's quite love yet.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
For those that don't think they could, why not? "
I want someone to feel a priority. Not one of "many". For me that distinction, a little loving pedestal to rank them above others, I might feel affectionate about, is the precious jewel in the crown. And I need the same in return.
Enough emotionally - I see it that way, not desiring to seek my needs of that kind fulfilled elsewhere, but working together on finding better version of ourselves through that focus on each other. Simply Him and me trying to enrich our lives, care and grow. More than enough. |
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By *iren!Woman
over a year ago
leeds |
I believe yes there are different types of love, love for family, love for pets and when it comes to lovers you can love each person for different characteristics etc but ultimately you will always love one person more than another |
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"Yes definitely. I felt for a long time there was something wrong with me for even entertaining ideas that I might be poly.
Now I'm very happy and secure in the knowledge that I can love more than one person at a time. Or at least have strong feelings for another, I wouldn't say it's quite love yet. "
You’re just a love machine  |
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"
For those that don't think they could, why not?
I want someone to feel a priority. Not one of "many". For me that distinction, a little loving pedestal to rank them above others, I might feel affectionate about, is the precious jewel in the crown. And I need the same in return.
Enough emotionally - I see it that way, not desiring to seek my needs of that kind fulfilled elsewhere, but working together on finding better version of ourselves through that focus on each other. Simply Him and me trying to enrich our lives, care and grow. More than enough. "
I love your answer. X |
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"I believe yes there are different types of love, love for family, love for pets and when it comes to lovers you can love each person for different characteristics etc but ultimately you will always love one person more than another "
Do you love one parent or child more? |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"Yes definitely. I felt for a long time there was something wrong with me for even entertaining ideas that I might be poly.
Now I'm very happy and secure in the knowledge that I can love more than one person at a time. Or at least have strong feelings for another, I wouldn't say it's quite love yet.
You’re just a love machine "
Well isn't that the nicest thing you've ever said to me? |
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"Yes definitely. I felt for a long time there was something wrong with me for even entertaining ideas that I might be poly.
Now I'm very happy and secure in the knowledge that I can love more than one person at a time. Or at least have strong feelings for another, I wouldn't say it's quite love yet. "
It sounds beautiful. I am happy for you. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
For those that don't think they could, why not?
I want someone to feel a priority. Not one of "many". For me that distinction, a little loving pedestal to rank them above others, I might feel affectionate about, is the precious jewel in the crown. And I need the same in return.
Enough emotionally - I see it that way, not desiring to seek my needs of that kind fulfilled elsewhere, but working together on finding better version of ourselves through that focus on each other. Simply Him and me trying to enrich our lives, care and grow. More than enough.
I love your answer. X"
Thanks.  |
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No disrespect to anyone else who has answered.
But if you love more than one person then I would say your not really in love with either.
I can't imagine being able to love anyone else as much as I do jools and wouldn't want to.
And definitely wouldn't want to be shared with another.
Sex is just sex.
Love is love and something far deeper than just a shag.
But that's just us.
If others are able to fair enough. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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"For those that do or have loved more than one at once, how did it go?
"
How is it going? Or how has it gone?
Well. Look, relationships aren't easy at the best of times. Humans are complicated, nuanced creatures. We all possess in varying degrees less than desirable traits; whether that be jealousy, insecurity, uncertainty of who we are and there's always that potential for those to rear their head in whatever dynamic we may find ourselves in.
Do I believe that monogamy is the best for everyone? No, definitely not. Far from it. How could there be one identikit relationship model for us all to follow?
Equally, I genuinely believe that for some, for a myriad of reasons, emotional monogamy is a core identifier of who they are. Neither is better or worse, it's more what's best suited to a person. It might even be for a moment in time. The wonderful thing about us as humans is that we have such a wealth of range, such diversity in our feelings. How we experience life. The values we hold. How others touch our souls, our hearts.
I know I couldn't give my heart to many, when I love I love fiercely. Brightly. Deeply. I feel too much and have no desire to share that amongst many, I want to nurture and protect the bonds I have with those I care about. Prioritise those who feel like home to me.
I'm afraid I may be frowned upon in some poly circles because I value and want to feel like a priority to those two people. I do feel like that. Know I am.
Our adventure may not be quite the Hollywood idealised version of love, the last time I saw one he described our relationship as strange. It is. It's non-conformist, stormy and passionate. He lights up my soul, encourages me to want to be the woman I could be. In turn, I like to think I bring him joy. My eternal curiosity encourages his. My utter nerdiness allows him to embrace things he may not have before. When we're together it's so... intense. Almost too.
My love for my fiancé is unwavering. An immovable object that even Sisyphus would struggle to push in any direction. They are two very different men but regardless of what the future holds, I have faith they'll be a constant in my life in some capacity for years to come.
So... I'd saying being poly is going well for me. Very well.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I can, I choose not to, not romantically.
Love takes different forms. I love my children. I loved my dog. There have been friends that I felt strongly for, not sure I could call that love or not? |
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"For those that do or have loved more than one at once, how did it go?
How is it going? Or how has it gone?
Well. Look, relationships aren't easy at the best of times. Humans are complicated, nuanced creatures. We all possess in varying degrees less than desirable traits; whether that be jealousy, insecurity, uncertainty of who we are and there's always that potential for those to rear their head in whatever dynamic we may find ourselves in.
Do I believe that monogamy is the best for everyone? No, definitely not. Far from it. How could there be one identikit relationship model for us all to follow?
Equally, I genuinely believe that for some, for a myriad of reasons, emotional monogamy is a core identifier of who they are. Neither is better or worse, it's more what's best suited to a person. It might even be for a moment in time. The wonderful thing about us as humans is that we have such a wealth of range, such diversity in our feelings. How we experience life. The values we hold. How others touch our souls, our hearts.
I know I couldn't give my heart to many, when I love I love fiercely. Brightly. Deeply. I feel too much and have no desire to share that amongst many, I want to nurture and protect the bonds I have with those I care about. Prioritise those who feel like home to me.
I'm afraid I may be frowned upon in some poly circles because I value and want to feel like a priority to those two people. I do feel like that. Know I am.
Our adventure may not be quite the Hollywood idealised version of love, the last time I saw one he described our relationship as strange. It is. It's non-conformist, stormy and passionate. He lights up my soul, encourages me to want to be the woman I could be. In turn, I like to think I bring him joy. My eternal curiosity encourages his. My utter nerdiness allows him to embrace things he may not have before. When we're together it's so... intense. Almost too.
My love for my fiancé is unwavering. An immovable object that even Sisyphus would struggle to push in any direction. They are two very different men but regardless of what the future holds, I have faith they'll be a constant in my life in some capacity for years to come.
So... I'd saying being poly is going well for me. Very well.
"
How beautifully and eloquently expressed Meli. You clearly have lots of love to share! X |
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I honestly think love is a spectrum and not just a few neat boxes. So not only do I think it's possible to love more that one person romanticly at the same time, I think you can love people at different levels of romance ranging between love of your life and close friendship. |
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"I honestly think love is a spectrum and not just a few neat boxes. So not only do I think it's possible to love more that one person romanticly at the same time, I think you can love people at different levels of romance ranging between love of your life and close friendship. "
Thank you. I think maybe in different ways as well? |
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"It's worth looking at the different types of love.
What do you mean?
Philia, agape, storge, platonic, romance, infatuation, obsessive, playful, enduring etc...
I am going to look that up! "
It's quite enlightening... Along with paternal, maternal, fraternal etc.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's worth looking at the different types of love.
What do you mean?
Philia, agape, storge, platonic, romance, infatuation, obsessive, playful, enduring etc...
I am going to look that up!
It's quite enlightening... Along with paternal, maternal, fraternal etc.. "
Not to mention internal  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can you really love more than one person in a romantic type way (rather than parents etc)? "
Of course you can. It's living with just one person that's bloody difficult. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think I can really, really like more than one person, bordering on a form of love. But the love where I would want to share a life with, I would only be able to do that with one person. |
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No, i don't think i ever could in a romantic way...i would feel so very sad if my partner loved somebody else in the same way he loved me...(i don't have one currently btw). I think i would almost feel a sense of betrayal.. |
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"We’re all different and some people have a lot of love to give and need to share it around. Too much love can overwhelm some people. Having more love in your life can be a wonderful thing.
Kx"
Love is wonderful indeed. X |
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I have been asked my views.
I believe that we have lots of love to give as humans. I don't think there is only one person on the planet for each of us.
I don't for one second think it is easy but I do think you can love or have deep, intense feelings for more than one person at once.
I hope it becomes more accepted in society too.
X |
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