FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Mistakes people make when first joining fab
Mistakes people make when first joining fab
Jump to: Newest in thread
Writing an overlong profile expecting people to read it. Maybe 1 in 10 messages I receive have looked at what I have written.
However my advice to any new member ‘is’ to write and create a decent profile. A woman can put up a few pictures and easily get messages from day one. But a guy will have to really put in some effort to be seen.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
My biggest mistake was accepting the age and picture of a woman I met was accurate. Not even close, probably 10 year old picture and massaged her age by 5 years.
I'm not against the age, I just couldn't accept the lie. Meets now in clubs only. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
 |
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Messaging all the local hotties with a simple 'hey you look great, check me out if you'd ever consider accepting my bone!'
I say that I got a few replies  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Don't insert vegetables and household objects into vaginas 
The one word reply game can become a little tedious.
If a profile has a list of demands do not reply.
If there's no male pics theres generally a reason.
Small cocks are quite cute.
That's about it for my learning of fab.
Mrs |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Messaging all the local hotties with a simple 'hey you look great, check me out if you'd ever consider accepting my bone!'
I say that I got a few replies "
Yep, got on lots of local block lists that way |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I started on here as part of a couple nearly 10yrs ago - we went a bit crazy, met too many couples, single guys, attended too many parties. Got swept up in 'fab politics...' dragged into others *issues*. Am much more discerning nowadays. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I’m still making mistakes, misjudging people, misjudging my approach and being drawn in by something that is too good to be true.
Not a mistake per se, but being genuinely bothered about what people think of me. Not in a narcissistic way, I’m a nice, easy going guy but I’ve annoyed some good people and I hate that. Wish I could repair that. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago
Stoke area |
Not setting my filters quick enough when I first joined.
Giving unverified or new people a chance.
Being too nice. Offering to meet for a social to give them a verification and then they either don't turn up or expect sex and pester you.
Trying to reply to everyone.
Not blocking people quickly enough.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Maybe couples should just sick to going to clubs. So judgemental and dismissive. Yes there’s time wasters you get them on all sites. "
Everyone is judgemental.
If you're not you're deluding yourself. If you don't make conscious decisions based on what you see and read (judgements) then effectively you're adopting an 'any holes a goal' approach.
Maybe more singles should go to clubs? They'd soon learn to engage with others in a positive way (you cant get away with crude comments/messages F2F), portray themselves in an attractive manner (nobody does well walking around shoving their cock on people's faces at clubs yet plenty do via profiles) and perhaps then they'd realise that how others perceive them is key to getting good attention and more likely to result in the physical encounters they seek.
I've wasted more time over the years engaging with people who have no clue how to converse online with others than I ever have with a fake profile, fantasist or what most would define as a 'timewaster'.
A |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Not setting my filters quick enough when I first joined.
Giving unverified or new people a chance.
Being too nice. Offering to meet for a social to give them a verification and then they either don't turn up or expect sex and pester you.
Trying to reply to everyone.
Not blocking people quickly enough.
"
The biggest thing for me was learning that being kind to give people verifications meant I was gonna get stood up a lot. Live and learn. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Maybe couples should just sick to going to clubs. So judgemental and dismissive. Yes there’s time wasters you get them on all sites. "
But you're being judgemental yourself with this statement. Couples have as much right to be on here as you or anyone else.
It's a good job hypocrisy isn't the thread topic. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Assuming that profiles were accurate.
That NSA also meant no drama.
That it wasn't one rule for some and different rules for others.
That adults would actually act like adults.
"
laughing because I actually thought the same at first! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I just presumed it was a casual sex site to meet people. I’ve come to see it’s a lot more aimed at connecting with people from the club scene. "
Indulging conversations with people who thought it was just a hookup site and had no interest in swinging |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Thinking I should try my best to answer every single message no matter how dreadful they were.
I was totally overwhelmed and out of my depth.
This time around I’ve toughened up considerably. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Joined when at work !! Bad idea
Did a picture in the loos at work !! bad idea
Not checking bowl before doing picture !! Some dirty person had left a present!!!
Not checking photo before posting lol
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I didn’t really use this when I first joined. If anything I should have used it more and connected with people online to keep in touch, that I had met in clubs.
Biggest regret for myself would be Investing my time into people that, I was under the impression they wanted to meet.
Also falling into the friend zone category.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"That everyone is honest and are who they say they are/turn up/respectful.
Or that we would meet fun friends straight away  "
Probably this. And that all users were open minded and friendly as that's what the advert says! I guess managing expectations. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Believing women are bi, getting to a meet only to discover that's the man's fantasy, not hers.  "
The reason I stopped meeting couples and don’t meet those that are only bi-curious. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Believing MF couples were a man and a woman
Turned up to a meet once with just the husband there and the wife was “stuck in traffic”
Long story short, it ended up with nothing happening, I left after he admitted there wasn’t a woman
My advice to any newbies is try and speak to both on the phone or a video chat. If that’s not possible at least have a 3 way chat on kik or WhatsApp. A 3 way chat isn’t fool proof but there’s a big difference between how a man and a woman write messages
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
Biggest regret for myself would be Investing my time into people that, I was under the impression they wanted to meet.
Also falling into the friend zone category.
"
This for me too, so many I spoke to that had no intention of ever meeting me yet saying different.
And friend zoned far too many times no matter how much I tried not to
Not finding the filters until I found myself overwhelmed by my inbox.
No worries when you're in a couple you just don't get spoken to 
Tinder x
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Thinking it was easy to meet with little effort 
Typical single guy thinking, I'll admit but glad I stuck it out because although they've been hard to come by, the experiences have definitely been worth it |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Went to our first large social in a pub not knowing anybody.
Took 20 minutes of chatting before we realised we were with the wrong group and it was a wedding party! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Being on here is a learning process. What are the mistakes you made when you first joined? "
Over exposure. You see people posting statues,pictures & cramming in as many meets as possible to achieve record number of verifications then puff they’ve burnt themselves out , thus not seen for a long time |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Thinking people would maybe reply to a message now and again. I realised after three months that people don't even read them before deleting them, so I don't even bother wasting my time anymore. "
People often look at profiles before reading messages. Perhaps they know you're not compatible so no point replying. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Not realising that it was a bit like 'six degrees of separation' on here....meaning that many people have met/had sex with friends of friends etc...its all a bit too 'connected'"
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I must’ve friend-requested about 20 women in the first two days of being on here… not knowing the etiquette… I was promptly blocked… oh well, we live and learn"
I get inundated with friends request from people who haven't even messaged me |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Joined when at work !! Bad idea
Did a picture in the loos at work !! bad idea
Not checking bowl before doing picture !! Some dirty person had left a present!!!
Not checking photo before posting lol
"
Yuck  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Also not sure why people take a dig at for my sexual preferences? Not cool.. "
I'm genuinely sorry if I gave the impression that's what I was doing. Tone is so difficult with text. You are entitled to any preferences you want, of course, and I wish you nothing but luck!
I just meant that from your threads elsewhere, you are (perfectly rightly) looking for a lot more than just fun and nice, and that is therefore going to be harder to find.
If I wrote a thread saying 'Why are there no nice women any more?', and my profile said 'under 30 only, DD or bigger, 26" waist max" - or something like that - you might feel justified in gently pointing out that difference. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
