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That guilty feeling
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Given the cost of living crisis and seeing on media how people are struggling, does what you spend on Christmas make you feel bad ?? ie maybe your food/booze shop make you feel you feel you need to down play what you spend to others? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nope, I don’t need to justify what I spend to anyone, though I’ll wager it’s less than average.
I only put my tree up today, a 6’ real Nordic fir, reduced to £2 at B and Q  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Easier said than done but I don't think anyone should feel guilty for either going a bit overboard or having to tighten up a bit. For me, it's all about the kids and you do what you can to make it as special as possible, the bits they'll remember you don't get from a shop anyway. I do hate people who post their present pile etc on social media, I think that's a really shitty thing to do when others might be worrying over what they've got. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do a little, and not just over Christmas but whenever I want to buy something I would consider a luxury item that I don't need but want. I'm in a good position with a well enough paid job but appreciate others aren't |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It makes me feel fortunate to have and be able spend what I do at present. Rather than feel guilty, I prefer to donate to the local food bank throughout the year x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have a small close family and we don't do big presents so I spend very little. I actually would love to have a huge Dickensian family blow out with all the trimmings! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I enjoy a careful indulgence on occasion in return for my hard work or efforts. Money well spent, good value for every penny. So I wouldn't feel bad savouring a lovely Christmas or gifting done with thought.
I can't stand waste though, stockpiling 'things' or buying another of something for the sake of it just because you can or to have it in every colour or whatever.... no thank you. That's not a smart use of funds. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do and I don’t. I work really hard and save to buy the things my kids want and seeing them happy makes it all worth it. However I do appreciate a lot of other people aren’t in a position to do that. |
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"No we don't feel bad. We work extremely hard all year round so we don't feel guilty on spending our hard-earned money on something the family will all enjoy."
This for me too. I’ve been working my arse off. No guilt here. |
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I am aware that so many are struggling but that doesn't make me feel guilty about treating those close to me.
If I were to be in the company of someone struggling I wouldn't go on about presents and what I was spending.
I do regularly give a little to charities both home and abroad.
Lately, I've felt even more compelled to do so.
Life is so shit for many.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nope I understand people struggle and understand others can’t give as much as me
But at the same time I can’t take it with me when I go
And no kids to leave it to just now
So would rather make the people cloest to me happy |
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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago
somerset |
ive cut right back this xmas ive brought festive food for 3 days xmas eve til boxing day and ive helped the kids fill their cupboards fridge and freezers too as well as put moneny back for their jan.feb bills to help |
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I don't downplay what I spend to other people, I don't spend a huge amount at Christmas anyway. One or two of my friends are struggling a bit, I wouldn't go out of my way to tell them what I'd bought but if they asked I tell them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Easier said than done but I don't think anyone should feel guilty for either going a bit overboard or having to tighten up a bit. For me, it's all about the kids and you do what you can to make it as special as possible, the bits they'll remember you don't get from a shop anyway. I do hate people who post their present pile etc on social media, I think that's a really shitty thing to do when others might be worrying over what they've got."
I suspect most who post pics of a crazy pile of gifts are a lot oof pound shop tat piled on |
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"
Given the cost of living crisis and seeing on media how people are struggling, does what you spend on Christmas make you feel bad ?? ie maybe your food/booze shop make you feel you feel you need to down play what you spend to others? "
Yes but not at Christmas as both work over it. So we don't realy do Christmas. But we do live very well and some times I feel guilty at how others have to manage. |
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By *TG3Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"
Given the cost of living crisis and seeing on media how people are struggling, does what you spend on Christmas make you feel bad ?? ie maybe your food/booze shop make you feel you feel you need to down play what you spend to others? "
I haven't spent anything special on Christmas, so my spending wouldn't make anyone jealous, some people do mind I know a family who decided this year to buy just one present but the brothers daughter who is 19 got really upset saying her older brother had many presents until he was 21 so she would like to continue until 21 receiving many presents and she had listed a £60 bottle of perfume as one of her preferred gifts lol, the brother or dad of said girl went round the rest of family offering £100 so they wouldn't be out of pocket, so I suppose mothers, dad's are under pressure to keep their children in gifts or risk upset  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Easier said than done but I don't think anyone should feel guilty for either going a bit overboard or having to tighten up a bit. For me, it's all about the kids and you do what you can to make it as special as possible, the bits they'll remember you don't get from a shop anyway.
**I do hate people who post their present pile etc on social media, I think that's a really shitty thing to do when others might be worrying over what they've got.**"
**   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Given the cost of living crisis and seeing on media how people are struggling, does what you spend on Christmas make you feel bad ?? ie maybe your food/booze shop make you feel you feel you need to down play what you spend to others? "
Nah. |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"
Given the cost of living crisis and seeing on media how people are struggling, does what you spend on Christmas make you feel bad ?? ie maybe your food/booze shop make you feel you feel you need to down play what you spend to others? I haven't spent anything special on Christmas, so my spending wouldn't make anyone jealous, some people do mind I know a family who decided this year to buy just one present but the brothers daughter who is 19 got really upset saying her older brother had many presents until he was 21 so she would like to continue until 21 receiving many presents and she had listed a £60 bottle of perfume as one of her preferred gifts lol, the brother or dad of said girl went round the rest of family offering £100 so they wouldn't be out of pocket, so I suppose mothers, dad's are under pressure to keep their children in gifts or risk upset "
If the kids are like that it’s the parents fault how they have raised them. Offering the £100 just reinforces Christmas is all about money to that family.
My kids get very little for Christmas from me but complete unlimited use of my credit card for Boxing Day sales, it’s a tradition, whatever they can spend in half a day as long as it’s sale items. It’s a test of trust on both parts! Never once have they spent more than 200-300 each. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I spend very modestly, I hate the comnercialism of Christmas so family and friends don't exchange presents with me -it's pointless nonsense.
I just enjoy the time off over Christmas, reflect on the year that's passing and hope for the one that's about to come. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Given the cost of living crisis and seeing on media how people are struggling, does what you spend on Christmas make you feel bad ?? ie maybe your food/booze shop make you feel you feel you need to down play what you spend to others? I haven't spent anything special on Christmas, so my spending wouldn't make anyone jealous, some people do mind I know a family who decided this year to buy just one present but the brothers daughter who is 19 got really upset saying her older brother had many presents until he was 21 so she would like to continue until 21 receiving many presents and she had listed a £60 bottle of perfume as one of her preferred gifts lol, the brother or dad of said girl went round the rest of family offering £100 so they wouldn't be out of pocket, so I suppose mothers, dad's are under pressure to keep their children in gifts or risk upset
If the kids are like that it’s the parents fault how they have raised them. Offering the £100 just reinforces Christmas is all about money to that family.
My kids get very little for Christmas from me but complete unlimited use of my credit card for Boxing Day sales, it’s a tradition, whatever they can spend in half a day as long as it’s sale items. It’s a test of trust on both parts! Never once have they spent more than 200-300 each."
What if you said to one of the kids that they can't use your credit card this year but the other(s) can?
I can see how the girl in the example above would feel upset that their sibling was given more than them. They can be upset even if they understand that money is tight.
(However I'd also agree it would be a bit shit if the girl was *demanding* money/ gifts.) |
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By *ames-77Man
over a year ago
milton keynes |
"
Given the cost of living crisis and seeing on media how people are struggling, does what you spend on Christmas make you feel bad ?? ie maybe your food/booze shop make you feel you feel you need to down play what you spend to others? "
I do have a heart for things like this had a rough childhood but I'm not gonna lie I work my Fucking ass off sometimes 15 hours a day so I don't feel bad for what I've got |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you have good people around you they won't care what your not spending or how much you are spending. To be honest why does anyone need to know x"
So much this |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I work two jobs so I can enjoy myself. I won't apologise for what I spend, neither will I be guilted into feeling bad about it.
I live alone, I'm single, I only have my mum and daughter, so gifts for them are of my choosing.
Sorry if that makes me sound harsh, but most of my adult life I've scrimped by, made do, relied on credit from others. Not anymore, I intend to enjoy the time no have left. |
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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago
Newcastle upon Tyne |
No we both work hard all year. What we have is through hard work and wise decisions made earlier in life when we had nothing. We can now enjoy what we have and benefit our family, we can't take it with us. |
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I don't spend a huge amount at Christmas, probably the biggest extravagance is taking my mum out for Christmas dinner so we don't have to shop and prepare and cook and clean and then probably waste a good portion of what we've bought.
I have had many years of being stony broke (I remember one year when I was a kid where we had corned beef for christmas dinner because it was the only meat that was affordable).
I don't feel guilty for how I spend, I feel thankful that I can live the way I live. |
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