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Pre Nuptial Agreements
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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What are your opinions of these ?
Do they serve a valid purpose for all or for just a select few ?
Would you consider having one ?
Would you be offended if your partner insisted you had one as a precursor to marriage ?
Do you know anyone that has one ?
If so, why did they think it necessary ? |
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After seeing how much my Dad fucked my Mum over (especially when he didn't own anything), I agree with them.
You cannot guarantee that people aren't going to change and as far as I'm concerned, all you're doing is protecting your assets. x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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id have no issue with signing one. if i were to get married it would purely be for love.
whats his is his. if we came into money as a couple and worked hard for new assets if we did end up seperating i prey it would end on nice terms.. but who knows what the future holds |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Got my fingers burnt more than once and I shall not hook up with anyone who is inferior to me in terms of social and financial standings.
I do not have any issues with a pre-nuptial agreement, as it will be for my own benefit too.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Pearl necklace??? you wont hook up with people in a less social or financial position than you? fuck me thats romantic. Pillow talk... Just before i open my legs, whats yer IQ, where do you live and how much do you earn and lets go to the ATM to check your bank balance.
That is the most ridiculous post this year... you win... a lawyer... |
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In the words of a mother, My only son will inherit all I have, all I have worked for and all that I have been given from my hard working parents. If some scheming cow thinks she is going to come along, marry him and rip him off for MY money she can think again. So my _iew is yes, I agree with them.
Slightly unhinged protective mother    |
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"In the words of a mother, My only son will inherit all I have, all I have worked for and all that I have been given from my hard working parents. If some scheming cow thinks she is going to come along, marry him and rip him off for MY money she can think again. So my _iew is yes, I agree with them.
Slightly unhinged protective mother "
Think we might have the same mother  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Got my fingers burnt more than once and I shall not hook up with anyone who is inferior to me in terms of social and financial standings.
I do not have any issues with a pre-nuptial agreement, as it will be for my own benefit too.
"
Your message will simply be deleted if you do not attach a face photo and a clear image of your last bank statement and credit card numbers and pin...oh and put $$$$$ in the message title to show you've read my profile 
Merry xmas |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just so you know. If you want to make one of these agreements out, a solicitor will gladly draw one up, for a fee. But it isn't worth anything in this country, and don't let a solicitor tell you it is. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It is not about the size of the bank balance. It is about being equal.
If the other person has the same as you, then he/she is unlikely to take advantage of you.
Besides, having lots of money does not make a person nice! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It is not about the size of the bank balance. It is about being equal.
If the other person has the same as you, then he/she is unlikely to take advantage of you.
Besides, having lots of money does not make a person nice! "
the law is not equal remove those thoughts from your head  |
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"Just so you know. If you want to make one of these agreements out, a solicitor will gladly draw one up, for a fee. But it isn't worth anything in this country, and don't let a solicitor tell you it is."
You will find it is the way a contract is drawn up that makes it invalid. If you say it's all mine not theirs even if we live together for twenty years a judge would find that contract is unfair, but on other hand you stated they would get so much for every year of marriage then that is considered reasonable as amounts were set in place before commencement of contract.
Had one and worked for me and yes she did try and get it over turned. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"wish id have had one, i wouldnt be skint now, the law is loaded in the womans favour sorry to say "
Is that why when my Dad walked away after having an affair, leaving my mother destitute and fighting to keep a roof over our heads the courts ruled she needed a second mortgage to give him £40,000?
In our marriage, everything is split equally. We both have fuck all. |
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Wish I didn't have one.... Will come out at the other end with fuck all..... In spite of what I have done adding at least £60K to the value of the house....as well as the increase in value over time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Everyone who gets married has a prenup if you think about it.
With thy body etc
Till death us do part
In sickness or in health blah blah blah..
I think it should be amended to:
I'll let you fuck me from time to time if you haven't pissed me off but I also retain the right to close shop for reasons I haven't figured out yet but you must still hand over your wages. |
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"wish id have had one, i wouldnt be skint now, the law is loaded in the womans favour sorry to say
Is that why when my Dad walked away after having an affair, leaving my mother destitute and fighting to keep a roof over our heads the courts ruled she needed a second mortgage to give him £40,000?"
Just had to check then and make sure you're not one of my siblings, as that's exactly what happened to us. 
- Amy. x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"wish id have had one, i wouldnt be skint now, the law is loaded in the womans favour sorry to say
Is that why when my Dad walked away after having an affair, leaving my mother destitute and fighting to keep a roof over our heads the courts ruled she needed a second mortgage to give him £40,000?
Just had to check then and make sure you're not one of my siblings, as that's exactly what happened to us.
- Amy. x"
Why should the man walk away with nothing while the wife gets the house? Sooner or later the kids will have grown and flown the coup and she'll still be sitting in a nice house that she's conned him out of. And she'll still kick him for maintenance for all those years too - which he should pay, as they're his kids - but to steal half of the family home from him and give it to her is taking the piss basically. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wish I didn't have one.... Will come out at the other end with fuck all..... In spite of what I have done adding at least £60K to the value of the house....as well as the increase in value over time. "
Can relate to this and I ended up bankrupt at the time as she went for every penny I had |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am eternally grateful to a very kind and generous ex-hubby, who let me take whatever I wanted.
We did not argue about anything, as he knew I was not the type who would take him to the cleaners, and I did not.
He kept the house that he bought for us, I kept my bachelor flat. He gave me the car as he knew how much she meant to me, let me keep the utensils that I sourced (I did get him a set of replacement first)
Unlike his cousin, who lost their marital home to pay for the lawyers when they argued and fought for custody of their dog!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I thought you only did a 50/50 split of the wealth created while you are together.
Historical wealth is protected. Our past Kings and Queens would have bankrupt the country otherwise.
"
If you have kids it goes 70/30 and if you have a devious ex wife like mine you get the lot house kids dog car every penny I earned oh and the money I saved to pay the tax man |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Flame away or take the piss at will.
I am only being honest about what I believe and feel, and am unlikely to lose any sleep or meet with anyone who do not understand or share my sentiments.
If I hear someone describing me as "a good catch" nowadays, I shall run a mile away as fast as I can.
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"Why should the man walk away with nothing while the wife gets the house? Sooner or later the kids will have grown and flown the coup and she'll still be sitting in a nice house that she's conned him out of. And she'll still kick him for maintenance for all those years too - which he should pay, as they're his kids - but to steal half of the family home from him and give it to her is taking the piss basically."
Because in our case, that house had nothing to do with him, it was owned by my Grandad (Mum's side) who left it to her, and the only people who ever worked on it or decorated it were my Mum's brothers.
Tbh, it's difficult to explain without writing an essay as a lot of it seems to have been done out of spite. - He had an affair and then left, moved back in with his Mum (who let him live rent-free for years), refused to pay anything towards us, went off "sick" when my Mum had to get the CSA involved but then got caught fiddling the system as he was doing regular cash-in-hand work, and then took out a load of credit cards and built up £60,000 worth of dept (and not to cover living, but going on three holidays a year with his new partner and her kids). When the time came he declared himself bankrupt and they decided he owned half of this house so came after us. If it wasn't for my Aunts and Uncles buying out the other half, we would've been out on the street and it's not exactly like he's gained anything from it. None of the money went to him, he lives with his new partner in a council house, none of his family/friends/our family talk to him and he lives a pretty dull life with no work and nobody who wants to know him so as far as I'm concerned, yes he put us through shit but Karma can be just as nasty. x
I know that's probably not the experience you had in mind, but that was OUR story anyway. I'm not saying they shouldn't be entitled to anything but when there are children under the age of 16 involved, I think the family home should be untouchable until said children are over 16 and depending on who inherited/paid for most of it, the share should work in favour of that person. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"wish id have had one, i wouldnt be skint now, the law is loaded in the womans favour sorry to say
Is that why when my Dad walked away after having an affair, leaving my mother destitute and fighting to keep a roof over our heads the courts ruled she needed a second mortgage to give him £40,000?
Just had to check then and make sure you're not one of my siblings, as that's exactly what happened to us.
- Amy. x
Why should the man walk away with nothing while the wife gets the house? Sooner or later the kids will have grown and flown the coup and she'll still be sitting in a nice house that she's conned him out of. And she'll still kick him for maintenance for all those years too - which he should pay, as they're his kids - but to steal half of the family home from him and give it to her is taking the piss basically."
excuse me?! He had affair, he broke their marriage vows! The agreement originally was his half of the house was to go into trust until my younger brother turned 18, them the house would be sold, my mom would have half and the other half would be split between us children. He decided instead out of spite to declare himself bankrupt so my mom wouldn't get anything. He already owned other property too. He never paid any maintenance either. So my mother conned him out of nothing. She worked her backside off for his company, keeping his house, looking after us and her thanks was him shagging her best mate and walking off with a large sum of money after drawing out a divorce for seven years. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm not saying they shouldn't be entitled to anything but when there are children under the age of 16 involved, I think the family home should be untouchable until said children are over 16 and depending on who inherited/paid for most of it, the share should work in favour of that person."
It's known as a charge against the property when the partner who is keweping the house cannot afford to buy the other out. The partner leaving the home holds a % of the equity as it stands at that time. This % is constant and if the house rises in value over x amount of years then the % holding rises too. It does not allow for the subsequent years of paying the mortgage but if someone wants to protect their investment (ie the % of the charge) then it's in their interest to pay maintenance on that property.
In my case, my ex/w could not buy me out as she only worked 20 hours a week (she maintains she got a mortgage but I know that's bollocks). I got £40,000, which was considerably less than I should have got but my lawyer told me that it would cost me £20k to fight it making it worthless.
Her father came up with the cash to buy me out and I knew his business dealings pretty well by then and a lot of what he earned was undeclared and kept offshore. I didn't argue the case as I knew that my (our) daughter was likely to be the only grandchild they had and she'd get the lot eventually (she still is the only grandchild eleven years later).
At the time my lawyer told me that if the sale of a marital home can provide a smaller house for both parties then that is what the courts would order (it may have changed by now, I don't know). Children came into play only if the sale of the house could NOT provide two homes, in which case the mother almost always gets awarded custody and, ergo, the house. I left all the possessions that we'd amassed as I didn't want my daughter coming downstairs at the age of four and asking where the TV was, or where the sofa was, only for her mum to reply, "Daddy took it."
As things have panned out we never got the courts involved in our finances as we both had good aolicitors who offered us grounded advice. We still speak regularly and there's no animosity there at all. Our daughter is a straight-A student so it couldn't have affected her that badly. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm not saying they shouldn't be entitled to anything but when there are children under the age of 16 involved, I think the family home should be untouchable until said children are over 16 and depending on who inherited/paid for most of it, the share should work in favour of that person.
It's known as a charge against the property when the partner who is keweping the house cannot afford to buy the other out. The partner leaving the home holds a % of the equity as it stands at that time. This % is constant and if the house rises in value over x amount of years then the % holding rises too. It does not allow for the subsequent years of paying the mortgage but if someone wants to protect their investment (ie the % of the charge) then it's in their interest to pay maintenance on that property.
In my case, my ex/w could not buy me out as she only worked 20 hours a week (she maintains she got a mortgage but I know that's bollocks). I got £40,000, which was considerably less than I should have got but my lawyer told me that it would cost me £20k to fight it making it worthless.
Her father came up with the cash to buy me out and I knew his business dealings pretty well by then and a lot of what he earned was undeclared and kept offshore. I didn't argue the case as I knew that my (our) daughter was likely to be the only grandchild they had and she'd get the lot eventually (she still is the only grandchild eleven years later).
At the time my lawyer told me that if the sale of a marital home can provide a smaller house for both parties then that is what the courts would order (it may have changed by now, I don't know). Children came into play only if the sale of the house could NOT provide two homes, in which case the mother almost always gets awarded custody and, ergo, the house. I left all the possessions that we'd amassed as I didn't want my daughter coming downstairs at the age of four and asking where the TV was, or where the sofa was, only for her mum to reply, "Daddy took it."
As things have panned out we never got the courts involved in our finances as we both had good aolicitors who offered us grounded advice. We still speak regularly and there's no animosity there at all. Our daughter is a straight-A student so it couldn't have affected her that badly."
Charging orders are still very much used.
Also don't know how long ago the cases are above, however it is rare that any court rules a lump sum should be paid out immediately. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm not saying they shouldn't be entitled to anything but when there are children under the age of 16 involved, I think the family home should be untouchable until said children are over 16 and depending on who inherited/paid for most of it, the share should work in favour of that person.
It's known as a charge against the property when the partner who is keweping the house cannot afford to buy the other out. The partner leaving the home holds a % of the equity as it stands at that time. This % is constant and if the house rises in value over x amount of years then the % holding rises too. It does not allow for the subsequent years of paying the mortgage but if someone wants to protect their investment (ie the % of the charge) then it's in their interest to pay maintenance on that property.
In my case, my ex/w could not buy me out as she only worked 20 hours a week (she maintains she got a mortgage but I know that's bollocks). I got £40,000, which was considerably less than I should have got but my lawyer told me that it would cost me £20k to fight it making it worthless.
Her father came up with the cash to buy me out and I knew his business dealings pretty well by then and a lot of what he earned was undeclared and kept offshore. I didn't argue the case as I knew that my (our) daughter was likely to be the only grandchild they had and she'd get the lot eventually (she still is the only grandchild eleven years later).
At the time my lawyer told me that if the sale of a marital home can provide a smaller house for both parties then that is what the courts would order (it may have changed by now, I don't know). Children came into play only if the sale of the house could NOT provide two homes, in which case the mother almost always gets awarded custody and, ergo, the house. I left all the possessions that we'd amassed as I didn't want my daughter coming downstairs at the age of four and asking where the TV was, or where the sofa was, only for her mum to reply, "Daddy took it."
As things have panned out we never got the courts involved in our finances as we both had good aolicitors who offered us grounded advice. We still speak regularly and there's no animosity there at all. Our daughter is a straight-A student so it couldn't have affected her that badly.
Charging orders are still very much used.
Also don't know how long ago the cases are above, however it is rare that any court rules a lump sum should be paid out immediately."
My parents divorce was finalised 8 years ago, and they split 13 years ago. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In our case 50% of fuck all is fuck all tho we have an agreement that if we split we'd carve things up and do it amicably.
We trust each other enough to do just that. |
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"Flame away or take the piss at will.
I am only being honest about what I believe and feel, and am unlikely to lose any sleep or meet with anyone who do not understand or share my sentiments.
If I hear someone describing me as "a good catch" nowadays, I shall run a mile away as fast as I can.
"
Pearl, wholeheartedly agree.....and for the record I think you said you wouldn't hook up with someone...nothing to do with pillow talk..... |
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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago
Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria |
I'm all for pre-nups, and I'm with Pearl - after my last ex stole a rather large amount of money off me as well as borrowing from me then I wouldn't hook up with someone who didn't earn a similar amount to me...
Also, for the record, there are decent folk about who wouldn't need pre-nups - my dad left my mam about 25 years ago and since then has supported mam in the family house, paid all the bills and given mam "housekeeping" every week. Finally got mam into social housing and sorted benefits out so dad doesn't have to pay that out anymore although he was happy to carry on paying bills but mam has now taken responsibility for them. |
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