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Really need some acvice

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By *ichaelangela OP   Couple  over a year ago

notts

The wife came home from work with a really stinking cold which she has now passed on to me.

She is sweating her tits off even though it is only 15degrees in here.

And me, i'm shivering my nuts off wearing trackie bottoms, a sweatshirt a thick dressing gown with a hood, a wooly hat and a scarf sitting on the sofa with a blanket over me.

Only solution i can think of is to put the heating on and put a chair for her outside.

Not sure she will agree to this, what advice can you give me??

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By *ichaelangela OP   Couple  over a year ago

notts


"The wife came home from work with a really stinking cold which she has now passed on to me.

She is sweating her tits off even though it is only 15degrees in here.

And me, i'm shivering my nuts off wearing trackie bottoms, a sweatshirt a thick dressing gown with a hood, a wooly hat and a scarf sitting on the sofa with a blanket over me.

Only solution i can think of is to put the heating on and put a chair for her outside.

Not sure she will agree to this, what advice can you give me??"

oh, and forgot to mention, every time she coughs or sneezes she does a fart

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By *tephTV67TV/TS  over a year ago

Cheshire

Turn the radiator off in one room and sit apart for the day. Or open a window in that room to cool it.

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By *ichaelangela OP   Couple  over a year ago

notts


"Turn the radiator off in one room and sit apart for the day. Or open a window in that room to cool it. "

and what about the farts??

They really are a bit smelly and tend to travel

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By *etcplCouple  over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

I think you should probably put your phone donw and do something more useful instead!

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By *ornycougaWoman  over a year ago

Wherever I lay my hat


"The wife came home from work with a really stinking cold which she has now passed on to me.

She is sweating her tits off even though it is only 15degrees in here.

And me, i'm shivering my nuts off wearing trackie bottoms, a sweatshirt a thick dressing gown with a hood, a wooly hat and a scarf sitting on the sofa with a blanket over me.

Only solution i can think of is to put the heating on and put a chair for her outside.

Not sure she will agree to this, what advice can you give me??

oh, and forgot to mention, every time she coughs or sneezes she does a fart"

I'm very turned on. Fancy meeting?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The poor girl's trying to warm the place up for you one fart at a time, how ungrateful!

Either that, or going by your description of your current look, maybe she just thinks you're a pile of laundry and is blissfully unaware she's pimping for Britain to an audience

Sending thoughts and prayers anyway to your hot/cold, stinky, germ den. Hope you both make it through this

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

hmm

im no doctor

but maybe put some straw in tje garage and get her to sleep in there and you can crank tje heating up.

if your garage is downstairs with a room above her farts will keep you warm lile medievil times.

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan  over a year ago

Gloucestershire

The Holy Trinity

Cough, Sneeze & Fart.

She's fine.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

1. Put her next to a radiator so she can warm it up. Use the loft.... don't want nosey neighbours thinking she chained by the sink. Crack a window so she can crack farts in peace.

2. Ask her to get you an extra duvet while she's in the loft and warm it in the tumbly before she wraps you up in it ......

Hope that helps.

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By *inger_SnapWoman  over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

Separate rooms

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By *ichaelangela OP   Couple  over a year ago

notts


"hmm

im no doctor

but maybe put some straw in tje garage and get her to sleep in there and you can crank tje heating up.

if your garage is downstairs with a room above her farts will keep you warm lile medievil times.

"

Like the garage idea, it is really cold in there though so maybe i could leave the car engine running to help take the chill off??

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"hmm

im no doctor

but maybe put some straw in tje garage and get her to sleep in there and you can crank tje heating up.

if your garage is downstairs with a room above her farts will keep you warm lile medievil times.

Like the garage idea, it is really cold in there though so maybe i could leave the car engine running to help take the chill off??"

Chris Whitty says noooooooooooo

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By *ellhungvweMan  over a year ago

Cheltenham


"The wife came home from work with a really stinking cold which she has now passed on to me.

She is sweating her tits off even though it is only 15degrees in here.

And me, i'm shivering my nuts off wearing trackie bottoms, a sweatshirt a thick dressing gown with a hood, a wooly hat and a scarf sitting on the sofa with a blanket over me.

Only solution i can think of is to put the heating on and put a chair for her outside.

Not sure she will agree to this, what advice can you give me??

oh, and forgot to mention, every time she coughs or sneezes she does a fart"

I would make sure you put her out the back door rather than the front. Don’t want her farting through the letter box if you can avoid it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Pack her bags, only way out.

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By *andy and DannyCouple  over a year ago

Barnstaple

This thread is hilarious

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By *ty31Man  over a year ago

NW London

Use some Irish Logic: turn the heaters up full blast and open all the windows.

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By *ty31Man  over a year ago

NW London

And give her a butt plug for the flatulence

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"The wife came home from work with a really stinking cold which she has now passed on to me.

She is sweating her tits off even though it is only 15degrees in here.

And me, i'm shivering my nuts off wearing trackie bottoms, a sweatshirt a thick dressing gown with a hood, a wooly hat and a scarf sitting on the sofa with a blanket over me.

Only solution i can think of is to put the heating on and put a chair for her outside.

Not sure she will agree to this, what advice can you give me??

oh, and forgot to mention, every time she coughs or sneezes she does a fart"

Fanny fart or fart box?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Turn the radiator off in one room and sit apart for the day. Or open a window in that room to cool it.

and what about the farts??

They really are a bit smelly and tend to travel"

A lighter will do the trick. Will warm the place up too

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

Paracetamol all round

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By *uck-RogersMan  over a year ago

Oakhill


"The wife came home from work with a really stinking cold which she has now passed on to me.

She is sweating her tits off even though it is only 15degrees in here.

And me, i'm shivering my nuts off wearing trackie bottoms, a sweatshirt a thick dressing gown with a hood, a wooly hat and a scarf sitting on the sofa with a blanket over me.

Only solution i can think of is to put the heating on and put a chair for her outside.

Not sure she will agree to this, what advice can you give me??

oh, and forgot to mention, every time she coughs or sneezes she does a fart"

Simple solution really ! Turn the heating up and keep a bunch of bananas in the freezer to plug her ass.

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By *TG3Man  over a year ago

Dorchester


"The wife came home from work with a really stinking cold which she has now passed on to me.

She is sweating her tits off even though it is only 15degrees in here.

And me, i'm shivering my nuts off wearing trackie bottoms, a sweatshirt a thick dressing gown with a hood, a wooly hat and a scarf sitting on the sofa with a blanket over me.

Only solution i can think of is to put the heating on and put a chair for her outside.

Not sure she will agree to this, what advice can you give me??

oh, and forgot to mention, every time she coughs or sneezes she does a fart"

put a blanket over her head and ask if she can smell her farts if she can't rush her to the Dr.

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By *aomilatteCouple  over a year ago

Midlands

Put FFP3 masks on and hug each other. She warms you up and you cool her down, save a fortune on heating bills too

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By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset


"And give her a butt plug for the flatulence "

And risk her farting and smashing one of the windows?

That would let all the heat out.

Just shove a hose up her chuff and collect the farts. You can then use the gas for heating. Winner!!

A

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By *an4funMan  over a year ago

london


"hmm

im no doctor

but maybe put some straw in tje garage and get her to sleep in there and you can crank tje heating up.

if your garage is downstairs with a room above her farts will keep you warm lile medievil times.

"

The straw in the garage, coupled with the time of year would make for an alternative nativity scene. You just need the 3 wise men bearing gifts to pop in and do their thing

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Bet your wife will love you even more for posting this about her.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Rub her. Love her. Breathe in her illness. True love.

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By *ichaelangela OP   Couple  over a year ago

notts


"hmm

im no doctor

but maybe put some straw in tje garage and get her to sleep in there and you can crank tje heating up.

if your garage is downstairs with a room above her farts will keep you warm lile medievil times.

The straw in the garage, coupled with the time of year would make for an alternative nativity scene. You just need the 3 wise men bearing gifts to pop in and do their thing "

Impossible to find 3 wise men and a virgin round here

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