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Conflicted for Christmas.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I’m coming to one year sobriety in Jan, I quit the booze for personal & health reasons.
Just feel, everything about Christmas / New Year time is just catered to getting shitfaced. Quite disappointed in my small circle, as a few times they’ve told me just to have “one beer”.
I don’t know if it’s me, but I feel conflicted in the sense I don’t want to touch the booze. But also don’t want to be the party pooper? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are some really tasty non alcoholic beers out now compared to even a few years ago. If you wanted to have a beer with your friends but not have alcohol.
If your happy with your decision then don't worry about being a party pooper I'm sure your friends don't care if you drink or not they are probably just trying to be polite |
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Friends support each other's decisions of they're sensible and rational. I honestly thought this culture of calling people who don't want to drink party poopers had gone.
I dislike dancing, I have rhythm, I feel awkward. I was going out and someone began insisting that if I was joining them I *would* be dancing...I didn't go. Social occasions should be relaxed and fun. |
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"If they're making you feel like a party pooper for taking care of yourself it might be time to find new friends."
I totally agree. If they're aware that it's a serious issue for you, then instead of pushing you towards ' one little drink ' . Real friends would steer you away. |
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"Friends support each other's decisions of they're sensible and rational. I honestly thought this culture of calling people who don't want to drink party poopers had gone.
I dislike dancing, I have rhythm, I feel awkward. I was going out and someone began insisting that if I was joining them I *would* be dancing...I didn't go. Social occasions should be relaxed and fun."
I have no rhythm that should say |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have a close friend who is teetotal. He told me his story one day, and he tells me about situations like you’ve described - he’s come so far since he gave up and I have endless admiration for people like you, OP, who can give up drink. He’ll be round mine for food at the weekend, and the Bavaria is in the fridge, ready for him  |
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There's always the antibiotics or cocodamol excuse for people who are really insistent. Fill a plastic bag with cold vegetable soup (it looks realistic enough in the dark), if they still insist, fill your mouth with it and accidentally 'throw up' on their shoes. They won't insist you drink again  |
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"There's always the antibiotics or cocodamol excuse for people who are really insistent. Fill a plastic bag with cold vegetable soup (it looks realistic enough in the dark), if they still insist, fill your mouth with it and accidentally 'throw up' on their shoes. They won't insist you drink again "
An extreme measure, but I like your thinking! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Firstly, Well done OP, congratulations.
You are not a party pooper for not drinking, you are not a party proper for looking after your health, both mental and physical.
Saying you're on medication is always a great excuse, if they pry, simply say it's personal and you'd rather not go into it.
But, the bonus is that by offering to be designated driver means you should never have to pay for soft drinks and your friends should be grateful to have you. If they're not, find new, more mature friends. |
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"There's always the antibiotics or cocodamol excuse for people who are really insistent. Fill a plastic bag with cold vegetable soup (it looks realistic enough in the dark), if they still insist, fill your mouth with it and accidentally 'throw up' on their shoes. They won't insist you drink again
An extreme measure, but I like your thinking! "
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By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago
NORWAY Wherever I lay my hat |
Good on you for making that change in your life. Stay true to yourself and don't either cave in to so called friends putting pressure on you to have a drink, or feel obliged to lie for the fact that you are sticking to soft or non alcoholic drinks. Your body, your choices. |
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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago
Secret hideaway in the pennines |
"I’m coming to one year sobriety in Jan, I quit the booze for personal & health reasons.
Just feel, everything about Christmas / New Year time is just catered to getting shitfaced. Quite disappointed in my small circle, as a few times they’ve told me just to have “one beer”.
I don’t know if it’s me, but I feel conflicted in the sense I don’t want to touch the booze. But also don’t want to be the party pooper? "
nowadays, there are some amazing alcohol free beers and lagers, if you feel you could handle them |
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"I think it's stupid that people are given a hard time about not drinking during social events. If people can't have fun because you're not drinking, then that's their problem!"
Indeed.
I tend to tell people they can like it or lump it. |
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By *xydadbodMan
over a year ago
Milton keynes |
"Thanks to each and one of you who replied to this forum, I do appreciate it.
   "
Firstly, well done to you for making that first step. I bet it wasn't easy step to make but if will benefit your health, thats awesome though.
I do agree with others on here. If your friends are insisting you have one drink, knowing the reason why you decided to stop in the first place, it's definitely time you need to reconsider finding new friends |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"….. everything about Christmas / New Year time is just catered to getting shitfaced. Quite disappointed in my small circle, as a few times they’ve told me just to have “one beer”.
"
They sound nice….
^sarcasms
Nobody should pressure anyone into just having one of anything.
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That's why non acholic beer/cider work for me, when out not drinking with mates in a pub. There is always the disappointment "oh you're not drinking coment" as if I need that to be fun. I know they mean well |
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By *TG3Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"I’m coming to one year sobriety in Jan, I quit the booze for personal & health reasons.
Just feel, everything about Christmas / New Year time is just catered to getting shitfaced. Quite disappointed in my small circle, as a few times they’ve told me just to have “one beer”.
I don’t know if it’s me, but I feel conflicted in the sense I don’t want to touch the booze. But also don’t want to be the party pooper? "
stay off it get shit faced on life instead |
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By *kcirtMan
over a year ago
West Lothian |
I was a functioning alcoholic from my late teens to my late 30s when my gran died in the November. I decided to do the dry January challenge to raise money for BHF. Stopped drinking at 11:59 New Year’s Eve and done the whole month, was the hardest thing I have ever done, shakes, withdrawals, not nice. So don’t let anyone take quitting the drink away from you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just because your not drinking doesn't mean your a party proper.
I haven't had a drink for around 3 years now. Others drinking does not bother me I just don't feel the need to. I hate it when people try to encourage you to do something that you have made clear that you don't want to do for whatever reason. |
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I agree with all the other posters, its your choice and i would always respect someones choice. Ive witnessed this in the past and have stood up for the person not drinking, why do we have this idea that you have to drink alcohol to be, or to have, fun? I dont think that you should have to make an excuse though, or drink non-alcohol beer etc. Your friends should respect your decision x |
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By *kcirtMan
over a year ago
West Lothian |
"I was a functioning alcoholic from my late teens to my late 30s when my gran died in the November. I decided to do the dry January challenge to raise money for BHF. Stopped drinking at 11:59 New Year’s Eve and done the whole month, was the hardest thing I have ever done, shakes, withdrawals, not nice. So don’t let anyone take quitting the drink away from you. "
And honestly being 8 years pretty much sober I much prefer being that way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I hate the pressure to drink... There are tonnes of non-alcoholic beers, cocktails etc... Just make sure you are getting them from the bar unless you really trust your friends not to 'accidentally' slip a shot in
Of course you could always arrange to drive?? Maybe have a fake reason for going somewhere the next day mega early? |
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"I was a functioning alcoholic from my late teens to my late 30s when my gran died in the November. I decided to do the dry January challenge to raise money for BHF. Stopped drinking at 11:59 New Year’s Eve and done the whole month, was the hardest thing I have ever done, shakes, withdrawals, not nice. So don’t let anyone take quitting the drink away from you. "
My partner was same having worked then run pubs pretty much since leaving school! In end it gave him that alcohol epilepsy! Was totally dependant on alcohol! It took him in the end 12 years ago when our children were 18 14 and 11! Allways pleased to hear when people have beat this demon Be very proud of yourself for that! X |
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I've been teetotal all my life and never tasted alcohol.
When I was a teenager a "friend" told me I wasn't a real man unless I took a drink.
I felt more of a man for not giving in to peer pressure.
I've been told by complete strangers on holiday and at a training course that I was a fake Irishman for refusing to drink.
In regards to work colleagues though the opposite has always been the case.
I've never been allowed to contribute to the kitty or buy a round because they felt it wasn't fair on me.
I've never needed alcohol so I can't say I understand why some people do but I don't see the attraction in getting pissed and definitely don't understand the need to put pressure on others to do so. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was a functioning alcoholic from my late teens to my late 30s when my gran died in the November. I decided to do the dry January challenge to raise money for BHF. Stopped drinking at 11:59 New Year’s Eve and done the whole month, was the hardest thing I have ever done, shakes, withdrawals, not nice. So don’t let anyone take quitting the drink away from you. "
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I was a functioning alcoholic from my late teens to my late 30s when my gran died in the November. I decided to do the dry January challenge to raise money for BHF. Stopped drinking at 11:59 New Year’s Eve and done the whole month, was the hardest thing I have ever done, shakes, withdrawals, not nice. So don’t let anyone take quitting the drink away from you. "
I’m glad you’re here today, sharing wisdom and knowledge my friend. Sorry for your loss as well, I went through a pretty nasty situation myself. And I dealt with shakes, withdrawals & I’d lie now and tell myself they are times I’m like “ fuck it “. But I see how far I’ve come, both Mentally & Physically and most importantly as a person, as a Father. I’d never take that trip back down that lane, I do truly have some great friends. Just some others piss me off, but thank-you for your comment ( and everyone else’s too, it’s appreciated more than you can know ) |
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