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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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The problem? I mean is everything going down the shitter because of you, is it your decisions that are strangling your ability to wade through life and not feel like you’re drowning? Is that you? Same… so I’m starting them resolutions early, this time next year I will be better educated and better shape, also in a better state of mind because of it, I’d I failed I tried, come on assgole you can do it, send me New Years resolution early, wild, improbable, let’s fucking do this …. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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I think sometimes I can be the problem yeah. I don't really say how I really feel about things often and sometimes I'm kind of intense.
But then, fuck is it other people sometimes. I'm quite happy just plodding on with things and then....  |
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Opportunity for a good Taylor Swift segway here, but I won't...
I think we're all the problem at some point, surely. I think the important thing is to recognise that, and then make plans/take the steps to fix the things you can control. Good luck, OP. On and up.
...at teatime, everybody agrees...(oh, I did). |
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I lot of things fell apart for me this year that I had little or no control over. However, I do have control over working through my feelings about those things and putting my life back together. I'm getting there. |
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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago
Secret hideaway in the pennines |
My world went down the toilet a couple of years ago, partly because of my action and inaction, partly due to lockdown and partly due to health issues.
As a result I now control more of my actions and situations. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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"Opportunity for a good Taylor Swift segway here, but I won't...
I think we're all the problem at some point, surely. I think the important thing is to recognise that, and then make plans/take the steps to fix the things you can control. Good luck, OP. On and up.
...at teatime, everybody agrees...(oh, I did)."
I'm proud of you for Taylor Swifting it. Yeah, we can take agency for our own behaviour and actions. Do that. But also recognise that it's not always you. You can't control or dictate how others behave. But working on you helps a lot. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The only way to true happiness is to rid yourself of the need of it my resolution is to rid myself of all feelings of softness and become selfish like i was as a young man see nobody as equal see people for what they are figments of my mind designed to serve my will fuck equality and care its just a way to control people |
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"I lot of things fell apart for me this year that I had little or no control over. However, I do have control over working through my feelings about those things and putting my life back together. I'm getting there. "
Perfectly put and I concur |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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"The only way to true happiness is to rid yourself of the need of it my resolution is to rid myself of all feelings of softness and become selfish like i was as a young man see nobody as equal see people for what they are figments of my mind designed to serve my will fuck equality and care its just a way to control people "
No. Don't become selfish. Life is crappy and emotions mean you can feel hurt. Be angry. Irritated. Unsure. Feel those things and then think about all the positives. Controlling people doesn't serve you deep down. But giving yourself space to be human and to care in the myriad of ways it presents itself is wonderful.
Sometimes when I'm feeling a bit well *insert negative emotion* I think how great it would be if I didn't give a fuck. But I do. And that's a sort of power isn't it? Don't think you need to give all the fucks, certainly not when people don't give a fuck about you. But don't fuck yourself and others over thinking you should stop feeling. And caring. |
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"Opportunity for a good Taylor Swift segway here, but I won't...
I think we're all the problem at some point, surely. I think the important thing is to recognise that, and then make plans/take the steps to fix the things you can control. Good luck, OP. On and up.
...at teatime, everybody agrees...(oh, I did).
I'm proud of you for Taylor Swifting it. Yeah, we can take agency for our own behaviour and actions. Do that. But also recognise that it's not always you. You can't control or dictate how others behave. But working on you helps a lot."
No, of course. It's not always you, and definitely not saying to pile the blame on yourself for others' actions, which is easy to do.
Equally, though, it's not always someone else, so don't always start there. I guess it's normally a combination of the two. But I meant in terms the OP and resolutions, you can decide to make yourself better/fitter, or try to distance yourself from those who make you feel worse, and try to focus on the things you can control... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The only way to true happiness is to rid yourself of the need of it my resolution is to rid myself of all feelings of softness and become selfish like i was as a young man see nobody as equal see people for what they are figments of my mind designed to serve my will fuck equality and care its just a way to control people
No. Don't become selfish. Life is crappy and emotions mean you can feel hurt. Be angry. Irritated. Unsure. Feel those things and then think about all the positives. Controlling people doesn't serve you deep down. But giving yourself space to be human and to care in the myriad of ways it presents itself is wonderful.
Sometimes when I'm feeling a bit well *insert negative emotion* I think how great it would be if I didn't give a fuck. But I do. And that's a sort of power isn't it? Don't think you need to give all the fucks, certainly not when people don't give a fuck about you. But don't fuck yourself and others over thinking you should stop feeling. And caring."
it would be so much easier by definition vulnerability is weakness the only way to be strong is to purge that abilty to feel that way |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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"vulnerability is weakness the only way to be strong is to purge that abilty to feel that way "
Nah. Vulnerability isn't weakness. Being vulnerable takes a lot of strength. It's saying hey, this is me and how I'm feeling. Opening yourself up and allowing people to see you as you. I'm not talking about the eternal victims, but being vulnerable with another? I think it's beautiful. You're taking control of who you are. And letting others see that. Strength isn't in not feeling. It's being able to handle those emotions or let others help you when you need it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The only way to true happiness is to rid yourself of the need of it my resolution is to rid myself of all feelings of softness and become selfish like i was as a young man see nobody as equal see people for what they are figments of my mind designed to serve my will fuck equality and care its just a way to control people
No. Don't become selfish. Life is crappy and emotions mean you can feel hurt. Be angry. Irritated. Unsure. Feel those things and then think about all the positives. Controlling people doesn't serve you deep down. But giving yourself space to be human and to care in the myriad of ways it presents itself is wonderful.
Sometimes when I'm feeling a bit well *insert negative emotion* I think how great it would be if I didn't give a fuck. But I do. And that's a sort of power isn't it? Don't think you need to give all the fucks, certainly not when people don't give a fuck about you. But don't fuck yourself and others over thinking you should stop feeling. And caring.it would be so much easier by definition vulnerability is weakness the only way to be strong is to purge that abilty to feel that way "
That's not true in the slightest.
We all have vulnerabilitys and pretending don't is the weakness. |
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"The only way to true happiness is to rid yourself of the need of it my resolution is to rid myself of all feelings of softness and become selfish like i was as a young man see nobody as equal see people for what they are figments of my mind designed to serve my will fuck equality and care its just a way to control people
No. Don't become selfish. Life is crappy and emotions mean you can feel hurt. Be angry. Irritated. Unsure. Feel those things and then think about all the positives. Controlling people doesn't serve you deep down. But giving yourself space to be human and to care in the myriad of ways it presents itself is wonderful.
Sometimes when I'm feeling a bit well *insert negative emotion* I think how great it would be if I didn't give a fuck. But I do. And that's a sort of power isn't it? Don't think you need to give all the fucks, certainly not when people don't give a fuck about you. But don't fuck yourself and others over thinking you should stop feeling. And caring."
 this |
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"The only way to true happiness is to rid yourself of the need of it my resolution is to rid myself of all feelings of softness and become selfish like i was as a young man see nobody as equal see people for what they are figments of my mind designed to serve my will fuck equality and care its just a way to control people
No. Don't become selfish. Life is crappy and emotions mean you can feel hurt. Be angry. Irritated. Unsure. Feel those things and then think about all the positives. Controlling people doesn't serve you deep down. But giving yourself space to be human and to care in the myriad of ways it presents itself is wonderful.
Sometimes when I'm feeling a bit well *insert negative emotion* I think how great it would be if I didn't give a fuck. But I do. And that's a sort of power isn't it? Don't think you need to give all the fucks, certainly not when people don't give a fuck about you. But don't fuck yourself and others over thinking you should stop feeling. And caring."
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I knew I am the problem, to some extent, with things that aren't perfect? That's OK and normal, with mistakes being 1 of pur better ways to learn.
Some of it is because I do too much and haven't taken enough care. I will be having a calmer 2023, so that I invest more wisely into what I do |
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