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Dear santa...

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

You know the drill you sit on his knee he asks what you want bla bla bla

Now what if santa promissed you a shag for chrimbo instead

How would you take it

If you got to the end of that congrats

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By *allySlinkyWoman over a year ago

Leeds

I would politely decline. I am not attracted to long white beards and big bellies.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

I'd be curious as to how they'd wrap the shag

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If Santa promised me a shag from Foxy

Or Maturevixen

Two of each please can’t be greedy

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By *allySlinkyWoman over a year ago

Leeds

"I'd be curious as to how they'd wrap the shag

He could stuff a cracker

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It's not what you get it the thought that counts...oh boy I've seriously thought of a few today

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think my cats would eat it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

An arteon

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By *hrista BellendWoman over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

If I sat on his knee I'd probably break it tbf and if he ate all those mince pies beforehand he'd probably break me....

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple over a year ago

Leeds

Yeah I’m not up for getting bummed by old Saint Nick. I’ve a dinner to cook.

The mr

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By *obyn GravesTV/TS over a year ago

1127 walnut avenue

I got fucked by Santa before.. promised me a bike and all I got was a jumper and some tangerines..

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By *allySlinkyWoman over a year ago

Leeds

"Yeah I’m not up for getting bummed by old Saint Nick. I’ve a dinner to cook.

The mr "

Do you toss your sprouts then cream your parsnip ?

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By *elisandre300Woman over a year ago

dontbefuckingnosey

I don’t trust him!

He promised me the night of my life last year… all I got was him breaking in my back door and emptying his sack all over my floor!

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple over a year ago

Leeds

"Yeah I’m not up for getting bummed by old Saint Nick. I’ve a dinner to cook.

The mr

Do you toss your sprouts then cream your parsnip ?

No but I don’t like to give the bird a good stuffing.

The mr

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By *allySlinkyWoman over a year ago

Leeds

No but I don’t like to give the bird a good stuffing.

The mr "

Why not ?

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By *9alMan over a year ago

Bridgend

I am an old man with a white beard you can sit on my knee & tell me how naughty you are!

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple over a year ago

Leeds

No but I don’t like to give the bird a good stuffing.

The mr

Why not ? "

Typo that’s meant to say do

The mr

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By *uriousscouserWoman over a year ago

Wirral

If I'm going to sit on an old fella's lap as my part of an exchange it would be a sugar daddy and I'd be doing it for cash.

I can get a shag without worrying I'll end up on the naughty list.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I mean, I do like older guys and I do like beards.

Not gonna say no straight away.

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By *eliWoman over a year ago

"I mean, I do like older guys and I do like beards.

Not gonna say no straight away."

x 2.

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By *ittlebirdWoman over a year ago

The Big Smoke

Dear Santa…

I’ve been naughty and it was worth it.

You judgemental old bastard

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By *issYeuxBleusWoman over a year ago

My boudoir - S Wales

"You know the drill you sit on his knee he asks what you want bla bla bla

Now what if santa promissed you a shag for chrimbo instead

How would you take it

If you got to the end of that congrats

Do you mean from Santa himself?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I would politely decline. I am not attracted to long white beards and big bellies."

Have you seen Christmas Chronicles? I'd ho ho ho for Kurt Russell's Santa for sure!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Also...Ryan Reynolds in a Santa suit...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I mean, I do like older guys and I do like beards.

Not gonna say no straight away."

What a strange coincidence, I'm exactly your type

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If its the Mr Clause from the audi advert, hell yes!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Dear Santa

I am definitely on Naughty list

If you can see past this

And one fb or fwb for Xmas

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'd nosh santa for the winning lottery tickets

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By *etcplCouple over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

"I'd nosh santa for the winning lottery tickets

What would you do for a free lucky dip?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'd nosh santa for the winning lottery tickets

What would you do for a free lucky dip?"

I'd ask.. Are you feeling lucky punk

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By *TG3Man over a year ago

Dorchester

"You know the drill you sit on his knee he asks what you want bla bla bla

Now what if santa promissed you a shag for chrimbo instead

How would you take it

If you got to the end of that congrats

"
you sit on Santa's lap lol cmon

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By *ad NannaWoman over a year ago

East London

Are we talking Bad Santa shag?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Depends at what point of the night and how full his sack is

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By *lderflower_AppleWoman over a year ago

Basingstoke

Apparently I'm on Santa's naughty list so doubt the elves would let me anywhere near his knee.

So moot point for me I think...

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