FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Has fab changed you?
Has fab changed you?
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By *humper. OP Man
over a year ago
northumberland/scotland |
Slightly misleading title, but, thinking about a comment on the thread I posted about guys with painted nails....
Fab hasn't changed me, but it has helped me explore who I am.
I originally joined fab about 1 year ago and have been off and on with my single profile and a couples one since then, anyway... I'm working away and thinking about what stage I was at in life when I first joined.
I've a feeling this could be a long post, get comfy.
I remember as a kid, my father saying to me "you'll always be OK son, just never do drugs, or be a poof" and, that was at the same time while I was being sexually abused (lasted around 2-3 years). The combination of the two played a big part in me never really exploring who I was/am. My anger. Who I became.
Fast forward a few decades and I join fab, predominantly looking for straight mfm.
Talking to my (on off) partner about joining and my reasons why, she questioned if I might be bi, I was actually offended by it.
But. Chatting openly on forums and seeing other people being so open about their sexuality got me thinking about my own. I think the fact I knew she liked the idea helped too in all honesty.
So, I acted on that curiosity.
This was a year ago.
A few nights ago I'm at home with my daughter and son, borrowing her nail varnish and my son (3) wanted his done too. So there we are... sitting painting our nails and laughing etc. It made me think about how closed minded and frankly homophonic I'd been for 39 of my 40 years. Never in a million years would I have thought that situation would have happened.
Now, I don't know what I'd class myself as (sexually) these days. Not really fussed either. But thinking about it today, the fact my daughter, family, friends etc know about my sexuality and accept it and how much I'm learning about myself makes me smile.
I think about cock, the same as I do Chinese food. Wouldn't want them regular, but every now and again I'm just in the mood for one, knowing full well the next morning my arse won't thank me for it.
Anyway, I should get back to work (try not to ruin my nails)... just thought I'd share.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *TG3Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"Slightly misleading title, but, thinking about a comment on the thread I posted about guys with painted nails....
Fab hasn't changed me, but it has helped me explore who I am.
I originally joined fab about 1 year ago and have been off and on with my single profile and a couples one since then, anyway... I'm working away and thinking about what stage I was at in life when I first joined.
I've a feeling this could be a long post, get comfy.
I remember as a kid, my father saying to me "you'll always be OK son, just never do drugs, or be a poof" and, that was at the same time while I was being sexually abused (lasted around 2-3 years). The combination of the two played a big part in me never really exploring who I was/am. My anger. Who I became.
Fast forward a few decades and I join fab, predominantly looking for straight mfm.
Talking to my (on off) partner about joining and my reasons why, she questioned if I might be bi, I was actually offended by it.
But. Chatting openly on forums and seeing other people being so open about their sexuality got me thinking about my own. I think the fact I knew she liked the idea helped too in all honesty.
So, I acted on that curiosity.
This was a year ago.
A few nights ago I'm at home with my daughter and son, borrowing her nail varnish and my son (3) wanted his done too. So there we are... sitting painting our nails and laughing etc. It made me think about how closed minded and frankly homophonic I'd been for 39 of my 40 years. Never in a million years would I have thought that situation would have happened.
Now, I don't know what I'd class myself as (sexually) these days. Not really fussed either. But thinking about it today, the fact my daughter, family, friends etc know about my sexuality and accept it and how much I'm learning about myself makes me smile.
I think about cock, the same as I do Chinese food. Wouldn't want them regular, but every now and again I'm just in the mood for one, knowing full well the next morning my arse won't thank me for it.
Anyway, I should get back to work (try not to ruin my nails)... just thought I'd share.
"
thank you made me smile  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I loved reading this. And yeah, fab hasn't changed me, but it was the first step in me being comfortable with who I am. Here and also the kink place we can't talk about.
18 months ago I joined, freshly separated, no idea about alot of things only that I knew there must be more to life. I am now happier than I've been in years, working on goals I've set for myself, going to clubs and events and making loads of friends along the way. Oh, and despite being single, I've got the best sex life I've ever had! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Yes I think it's changed me.
My ex introduced me to fab and up to then I'd had a reasonably vanilla, although good sex life, although in hindsight I've always had slightly kinky thoughts and likes but never acted on them.
I'm now in the most honest relationship I've ever been in and it's very freeing to be able to discuss with him anything without being judged.
I don't think I'd have had the confidence to do this without fab.
I've also become a lot more confident in myself and my body since joining.
Mrs M x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago
Not all that North of North London |
I'm not sure I'd say that fab has changed me bit I think the forums have influenced me (ive been here a long time). Negatively they've made me more cynical and more dismissive of people (though that's not entirely negative) but much more positively I think I've become a lot more accepting of who I am and that popularity doesn't really matter to me and that's down to the good and definitely bad interactions I've has on here over the years |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Good on you Thumper! Everyone here loves ya!
Never been homophobic as had a gay mate since primary school age so I've always been sexually liberal but men just don't do it for me!
This hasn't changed me in any shape way or form but it's nice to meet so many others out there who relate to being kinky. Not really one to chat to family and friends about 
Plus the amount of hot women on here who are filthy helps  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
" Fab hasn't changed me, but it has helped me explore who I am. "
This, pretty much. It's been a safe space to experience my sexuality, shake off the psychological hangovers from childhood, mostly guilt and shame, and come to terms with various other things. Fab has facilitated my journey of self-acceptance as a sexual being.
Nell |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
In regards to my sexuality it has actually made me even more comfortable being straight.
I've never been even slightly curious and nothing on fab has influenced that in any way.
The site as a whole has however made me more cynical and as already said above I don't see that as a bad thing because I won't be anyone's doormat as a direct result.
Those who bring a "Do as I say, not as I do" vibe to the forums and those with a bipolar approach to chatting and engaging have opened my eyes to the levels some will stoop to for attention.
Other than that I'm the same person as I was when I first joined. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
As a couple - we are stronger than ever. Open, honest & happy. Not that we weren’t before, but it has definitely been solidified.
On a personal level - I think it has brought me back to the woman I was in my youth. Strong, ballsy, body confident & a teeny bit filthy  .
Mrs m |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Yes and no its been a rollercoaster going from not knowing my own worth just trying to have a laugh with people having to grow my self confidence back and learning i am actually desirable and surprisingly gifted at the sex to finding what i wasnt looking for in a person il love beyond my death to not having that person in my life anymore and having to learn to laugh again in that its been very helpful so id not say its so much changed me as life during my time here has im no longer as cock sure or impulsive as i used to be and seem to suddenly have a patience and insanity that is legendary |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
I think about cock, the same as I do Chinese food. Wouldn't want them regular, but every now and again I'm just in the mood for one, knowing full well the next morning my arse won't thank me for it.
"
I love this  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *humper. OP Man
over a year ago
northumberland/scotland |
Just jumping on quickly to say thankyou for the encouragement, support etc. Was a bit nervous after posting this.
Fear not, sarcasm and normal service will resume shortly
But, thank you  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I think so yes.
I used to believe a lot of what people told me. Thought selfishness and manipulative behaviours were rare and you were unlucky in life to happen across people who acted that way.
At first this place changed me for the better, lifted my confidence, gave me an outlet, opened a world to me that I thought was fantastical! I mean, with such liberation and swinging being based on open communication and honesty who'd lie right? No point surely? It goes against everything at the core of swinging!
Then I learned that you're not "unlucky" to happen across those described above, the sad fact is that's actually become the norm.
So yeah, I'm now celibate and cynical. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Big bro hugs, Thumper.
Relaxed self-confidence is the best gift a person can give themselves. You’ve been a total star here on the forums lately, and probably because of being comfy in your own skin. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Similar journey on the bi side. And the label side.
I've gone from an ex who said anyone who is bi is really gay in disguise (!) and whos views on jealousy led me to doubting my ability to love ... To being comfortable (albeit not 100pc open) about who I am. And fuck labels.
Fab (no the people of fab) have really helped here. Love y'all. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I think it's helped confidence wise, I (Mrs) absolutely had zero and would never have dreamed I'd be posting sexual photos of myself, it's also enabled me to explore my bi side a little more and I guess more importantly realise not all men are horrible, we have had some lovely complimentary messages off men and via social events, I must admit due to a not so pleasant past I hated men (except the Mr of course) but it has definitely helped in more ways than one.
Great post op & your one of those lovely gents
Mrs |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
This is a great and well written post. Thank you for sharing. So glad you are more confident and comfortable to be yourself.
I have always identified as being bisexual but it has brought out hubby’s curious side more being on here. Growing up as a British Indian sex wasn’t really something we talked about and we are taught to save ourselves for marriage especially as a girl. It almost made me feel ashamed for having naughty thoughts. I was a virgin till I married hubby because I thought no man would want me unless I was a virgin. My husband showed me that is definitely not the case so we are making up for lost time on here lol. We are loving exploring our naughty sides on Fab and it has definitely helped with my confidence. All of my family still think I am a quiet, shy Indian girl who would never be on a site like this and I am happy for them to think that 
Mrs |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
What a fantastic and honest post OP.
FAB has changed our lives…what with meeting each other on here to pushing our boundaries well beyond what we expected.
We are living our fantasies out faster than we can think them up  Putting them into action rather than have them just in our imagination has been amazing
K
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
As others have said, that's a very heartwarming post, OP.
Has Fab changed me? I'm not sure. It's certainly allowed me to explore and broaden, so I guess so, but maybe more a catalyst than the cause. I don't know.
But, like you, I find being surrounded by people who are so open (and accepting, by and large) reassuring and encouraging, even if I am by no means as open as others, in showing that's it's "ok" to like whatever you like.
Keep painting those nails, OP  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Lovely post
It hasn't changed me as a person but fab for me has been a great place to explore, and be around non judgemental people (around sex), (more accepting). I also love the social aspect of it now. So that is one thing that has changed over the 10 years or so I have been about. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Thank you Thumper for your post, it was beautiful to read.
It's a difficult one. Would I say fab has changed me? Yes and no.
No in that I knew myself that if given the chance I would want to experiment on broadening my interests/kinks etc but prior to fab I was not even discussing this let alone acting on it.
Yes in that I am now chatting and meeting like minded people meaning I am now in a position to consider things I never would have in the past and am also able to physically experiment and broaden those horizons as they say.
I am still the same person I have always been but I feel that I am now being more true to myself. It is a very liberated feeling to be able to finally be able to act out your desires. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I couldn’t read and run, what a wonderful post and I imagine there’s many more out there that have experienced the same. Sometimes here you find that societal taboos are not actually taboos and we realise that we’re quite normal |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Really open and honest post, loved reading it. Fab hasn't changed me as a person no, but yes i've explored my sexuality. Joined originally as part of a couple, lets say i was 'bi curious', but having explored that, much as i love women, and boobs in particular...i now know i am 100% straight!! And definitely enjoying the journey.
As a side note, when my son was a toddler he wanted a pram and doll for Christmas...thats what he had and loved it!! Now slightly older, all he is interested in is girls, girls, girls |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Great post, OP. Loved reading it.
And to answer your question, yes, fab has changed us both.
We've never had an amazing sexual life as we have both been raised in very religious families where even talking about sex was considered a sin.
However, after 10 years of marriage and 5 years since we started swinging, our sex life changed a lot. Our body confidence, the trust between us has grown so much.
Of course, on this journey, we had so many challenges, and yes, I'll admit, at times jealousy and insecurities, but we have developed such an honest way of communicating and we managed to get over those challenges.
So yes, fab changed us... made us more open and strengthened our marriage.
Anna |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just finished work, too many kind comments to reply to individually but, you're a good bunch of reprobates
Very much appreciated. Oh, and my guyliner arrives tomorrow  "
I'd go gentle with you thumper so it would feel like a good quality Chinese the next day |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Yes it's changed me.
Going from a life of positivity and being cocooned from the negativity people can dish, whilst looking at the world through my naive rose tinted glasses.
It has introduced me to view, jealousy, back stabbing, hateful comments and people generally being cunts to each other.
Luckily whilst sifting, the gems do shine and strive to support and nurture true friends.
So cynical, yes. Wary yes. Belief in the good people, hell yes |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *humper. OP Man
over a year ago
northumberland/scotland |
"Just finished work, too many kind comments to reply to individually but, you're a good bunch of reprobates
Very much appreciated. Oh, and my guyliner arrives tomorrow
I'd go gentle with you thumper so it would feel like a good quality Chinese the next day "
Gimme some bang bang beef. Poof |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes it's changed me.
Going from a life of positivity and being cocooned from the negativity people can dish, whilst looking at the world through my naive rose tinted glasses.
It has introduced me to view, jealousy, back stabbing, hateful comments and people generally being cunts to each other.
Luckily whilst sifting, the gems do shine and strive to support and nurture true friends.
So cynical, yes. Wary yes. Belief in the good people, hell yes "
You said it so well! Same for me |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
It hasn’t changed me as such, but it’s opened my eyes to the lengths some folks will go to for casual sex. Not necessarily speaking from personal experience as mine have mostly been positive, but from observations on the forums etc.
I’ve always been highly sexed and a dirty bitch, that hasn’t changed, but now when I see a van parked up in a lay-by I no longer think it’s someone having their dinner, more likely a Randy sod having a quick wank.
I prefer the rose tinted glasses I wore previously where I had a more innocent view of the world.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *adMerWoman
over a year ago
Sandwich |
Life has changed me and I have changed since joining fab initially as a couple 15yrs ago.
I have met some amazing people, some not so. Had some awesome experiences.
Many awesome experiences actually!
I love the social aspect, especially in clubs and organised socials.
Despite it also having a more negative side, overall my experience has definitely been positive.
Thanks OP for your Chinese meal comparison, did make me laugh out loud.
I also loved the description of family nail painting. I used to do this with my daughters and son, when he was in the mood. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Good post OP and glad you have found your mojo in life - sounds like you’re also a great dad to your kids and have lots of fun with them! It’s those fun moments that they will remember!
To answer your question, I was never that confident as a teen / in my twenties with girls and have just come out of a long term relationship. Since then Fab has given me self confidence and made me believe in myself. It’s made me realise people do find me attractive both inside and out. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
OP, what a beautiful post.
I wouldn't say fab has changed me, but it's helped me to embrace parts of me which had been hidden away for a long time. It's brought a new level of honesty and openness to our relationship too.
Mrs TMN x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I think I changed before joining fab. I knew already I was a bit kinky and not heterosexual. I think fab just helped me on part of my journey exploring. I loved the fact that who I am is acceptable. My ex made me feel so bad about my sex drive I asked the doctors for something to make it go away. Sounds drastic, I should never have been at that point. So whether I'm liked on here or not I still know there's others just like me and its all OK. I guess that fact changed me in a sense.
Love your post OP.
T |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
It has but not sure how.
I had a very naive and innocent upbringing esp where sex was concerned and being shy and a victim of bullies did not help.
When I first found kink I thought I had found a place I could be me and be accepted and explore safely. The majority of the time I could but like any subset I also found politics, toxicity and being told you don't fit into these boxes.
Joining fab was a chance to explore sexuslly a bit more. At first it worked and I got to try things for the first or second time.
There are some of the same politics, toxicity and being told I don't fit the boxes so don't belong but I perserve |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *humper. OP Man
over a year ago
northumberland/scotland |
"OP, what a beautiful post.
I wouldn't say fab has changed me, but it's helped me to embrace parts of me which had been hidden away for a long time. It's brought a new level of honesty and openness to our relationship too.
Mrs TMN x"
Thats lovely |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Thanks Thumper, I've a big smile on my face .
I've been here almost 15 years and I've changed, perhaps mostly because I've matured, rather than because of Fab. I understand people better, from my Fab experience, which is a great thing. I'm a little more tolerant, though also a touch more intolerant too  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Fab has changed me in many ways. Opened my eyes to new experiences. Learned to stand my ground. I’m a stronger person, I don’t let anyone walk over me. Embraced who I am and confident in myself. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Fab made me realise I would have lots of amazing sex if I was bi sexual unicorn. The quality of women totally outweigh the men on here...but alack I can't do vag and definitely prefer a big fat cock in my mouth and pussy |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I joined fab because my work life is to busy to hold down a proper relationship... I've been a member
for a while but only ever met one member I'd like to meet more ... so it's not changed me yet but might in the future |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Fab made me realise I would have lots of amazing sex if I was bi sexual unicorn. The quality of women totally outweigh the men on here...but alack I can't do vag and definitely prefer a big fat cock in my mouth and pussy "
That’s fabulous |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I joined a similar site, after a rubbish ending to a long relationship where I had been constantly rejected. I’d thank him if I met him now. I had huge fantasies and desires. Once I decided to take opportunities, and say yes more, it’s been seriously eye popping crazy fun, with some beautiful humans, and I’ve realised that my wonky scarred body isn’t so bad after all.
Such an amazing first post. Brene Brown writes a lot of great things about vulnerability, and I feel this fits here - If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful spiritual lives, vulnerability is the path.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Fab has opened my eyes to the sexual possibilities out there even if they're not for me and given me more self-confidence and belief to be outgoing and try new things I wouldn't have imagined otherwise and yet I still think I'm only scratching the surface. I really look forward to what lies ahead |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"Fab has changed me in many ways. Opened my eyes to new experiences. Learned to stand my ground. I’m a stronger person, I don’t let anyone walk over me. Embraced who I am and confident in myself."
Its good that you have had your eyes opened to new experiences. We should touch base soon and share war stories |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *humper. OP Man
over a year ago
northumberland/scotland |
"Fab has changed me in many ways. Opened my eyes to new experiences. Learned to stand my ground. I’m a stronger person, I don’t let anyone walk over me. Embraced who I am and confident in myself."
Surprised to see you comment |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *humper. OP Man
over a year ago
northumberland/scotland |
" If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful spiritual lives, vulnerability is the path.
"
Vulnerability, owning it, embracing it... is our biggest strength. Society teaches us that it's a weakness, it's not, unless you let it dictate. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *xydadbodMan
over a year ago
Milton keynes |
I suppose in a way, fab has definitely changed me in many various ways. From increasing my self confidence, to be able to express the true me that those not on fab don't get to see.. but I didn't do it alone, along with the support of those I consider my friends that I've made while being on this site has definitely been a huge influence. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Slightly misleading title, but, thinking about a comment on the thread I posted about guys with painted nails....
Fab hasn't changed me, but it has helped me explore who I am.
I originally joined fab about 1 year ago and have been off and on with my single profile and a couples one since then, anyway... I'm working away and thinking about what stage I was at in life when I first joined.
I've a feeling this could be a long post, get comfy.
I remember as a kid, my father saying to me "you'll always be OK son, just never do drugs, or be a poof" and, that was at the same time while I was being sexually abused (lasted around 2-3 years). The combination of the two played a big part in me never really exploring who I was/am. My anger. Who I became.
Fast forward a few decades and I join fab, predominantly looking for straight mfm.
Talking to my (on off) partner about joining and my reasons why, she questioned if I might be bi, I was actually offended by it.
But. Chatting openly on forums and seeing other people being so open about their sexuality got me thinking about my own. I think the fact I knew she liked the idea helped too in all honesty.
So, I acted on that curiosity.
This was a year ago.
A few nights ago I'm at home with my daughter and son, borrowing her nail varnish and my son (3) wanted his done too. So there we are... sitting painting our nails and laughing etc. It made me think about how closed minded and frankly homophonic I'd been for 39 of my 40 years. Never in a million years would I have thought that situation would have happened.
Now, I don't know what I'd class myself as (sexually) these days. Not really fussed either. But thinking about it today, the fact my daughter, family, friends etc know about my sexuality and accept it and how much I'm learning about myself makes me smile.
I think about cock, the same as I do Chinese food. Wouldn't want them regular, but every now and again I'm just in the mood for one, knowing full well the next morning my arse won't thank me for it.
Anyway, I should get back to work (try not to ruin my nails)... just thought I'd share.
"
Nice read and good to see someone open up with the confidence to do so. It’s never easy but with the right person by your side they will always support you as long as honesty and truth prevail
Sadly so many not as brave as yourself through fear of judgment still and end up loosing those closest too them by shutting themselves away and seeking things away from home  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes and no its been a rollercoaster going from not knowing my own worth just trying to have a laugh with people having to grow my self confidence back and learning i am actually desirable and surprisingly gifted at the sex to finding what i wasnt looking for in a person il love beyond my death to not having that person in my life anymore and having to learn to laugh again in that its been very helpful so id not say its so much changed me as life during my time here has im no longer as cock sure or impulsive as i used to be and seem to suddenly have a patience and insanity that is legendary "
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Slightly misleading title, but, thinking about a comment on the thread I posted about guys with painted nails....
Fab hasn't changed me, but it has helped me explore who I am.
I originally joined fab about 1 year ago and have been off and on with my single profile and a couples one since then, anyway... I'm working away and thinking about what stage I was at in life when I first joined.
I've a feeling this could be a long post, get comfy.
I remember as a kid, my father saying to me "you'll always be OK son, just never do drugs, or be a poof" and, that was at the same time while I was being sexually abused (lasted around 2-3 years). The combination of the two played a big part in me never really exploring who I was/am. My anger. Who I became.
Fast forward a few decades and I join fab, predominantly looking for straight mfm.
Talking to my (on off) partner about joining and my reasons why, she questioned if I might be bi, I was actually offended by it.
But. Chatting openly on forums and seeing other people being so open about their sexuality got me thinking about my own. I think the fact I knew she liked the idea helped too in all honesty.
So, I acted on that curiosity.
This was a year ago.
A few nights ago I'm at home with my daughter and son, borrowing her nail varnish and my son (3) wanted his done too. So there we are... sitting painting our nails and laughing etc. It made me think about how closed minded and frankly homophonic I'd been for 39 of my 40 years. Never in a million years would I have thought that situation would have happened.
Now, I don't know what I'd class myself as (sexually) these days. Not really fussed either. But thinking about it today, the fact my daughter, family, friends etc know about my sexuality and accept it and how much I'm learning about myself makes me smile.
I think about cock, the same as I do Chinese food. Wouldn't want them regular, but every now and again I'm just in the mood for one, knowing full well the next morning my arse won't thank me for it.
Anyway, I should get back to work (try not to ruin my nails)... just thought I'd share.
"
its great hearing/reading positive things.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *klifeCouple
over a year ago
reading |
The brilliant thing about fab is it can let you be what ever it is you want to be , who ever you feel like being … with mostly no judgement… it can open new doors for your mind to wander … fantasies and curiosities you hadn’t even thought of xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"Fab has changed me in many ways. Opened my eyes to new experiences. Learned to stand my ground. I’m a stronger person, I don’t let anyone walk over me. Embraced who I am and confident in myself.
Surprised to see you comment "
It’s amazing what people can and will do once they have shared their stories about people on here |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Fab has changed me in many ways. Opened my eyes to new experiences. Learned to stand my ground. I’m a stronger person, I don’t let anyone walk over me. Embraced who I am and confident in myself.
Surprised to see you comment
It’s amazing what people can and will do once they have shared their stories about people on here "
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Fab has changed me in many ways. Opened my eyes to new experiences. Learned to stand my ground. I’m a stronger person, I don’t let anyone walk over me. Embraced who I am and confident in myself.
Its good that you have had your eyes opened to new experiences. We should touch base soon and share war stories "
Sounds like a good idea |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Ahh Thumper, you big melt..
Lovely thread.
Has fab changed us..? Nah, I always dress in fishnets makeup and riding boots..
Fab didn’t change us, it encouraged us to be honest with ourselves, to be open with our friends and to embrace others, no matter how weird & wonderful.
Meeting each other on here has formed the most honest relationship ever and helped make some lifelong friends. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
" If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful spiritual lives, vulnerability is the path.
Vulnerability, owning it, embracing it... is our biggest strength. Society teaches us that it's a weakness, it's not, unless you let it dictate."
Love this |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Fab has changed me in many ways. Opened my eyes to new experiences. Learned to stand my ground. I’m a stronger person, I don’t let anyone walk over me. Embraced who I am and confident in myself.
Surprised to see you comment "
Nothing to be surprised at |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago
Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria |
Always liked your honesty and openness Thumper, it makes a refreshing change for someone to lay themselves bare, so to speak.
Personally it’s not changed us as we were already in the lifestyle long before we joined fab but its been an amazing experience being on here with the people we have met along the way and the adventures it’s brought.
Glad you have found your happy place and that fab is a positive journey for you, long may it continue xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *humper. OP Man
over a year ago
northumberland/scotland |
"Fab has changed me in many ways. Opened my eyes to new experiences. Learned to stand my ground. I’m a stronger person, I don’t let anyone walk over me. Embraced who I am and confident in myself.
Surprised to see you comment
Nothing to be surprised at "
You know you've blocked me, right?  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *humper. OP Man
over a year ago
northumberland/scotland |
"Always liked your honesty and openness Thumper, it makes a refreshing change for someone to lay themselves bare, so to speak.
Personally it’s not changed us as we were already in the lifestyle long before we joined fab but its been an amazing experience being on here with the people we have met along the way and the adventures it’s brought.
Glad you have found your happy place and that fab is a positive journey for you, long may it continue xx "
Thankyou, miss shagwell |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *humper. OP Man
over a year ago
northumberland/scotland |
" If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful spiritual lives, vulnerability is the path.
Vulnerability, owning it, embracing it... is our biggest strength. Society teaches us that it's a weakness, it's not, unless you let it dictate.
Love this "
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *humper. OP Man
over a year ago
northumberland/scotland |
"This is such a fantastic, authentic and open thread OP.
I'm not going to do my usual waffle in reply but I will say I've really enjoyed reading this. x"
This is a safe space, feel free to let the waffle fly free haha. And thankyou. I was nervous after I posted it but it's been a great response |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I don’t personally thing that fab has changed per se, maybe the ppl I have met had an impact on the the way I perceive things now, but fab was just the platform I used to meet those persons. So to that extent, it hasn’t.
Fab changed my way of thinking before posting though  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Fab has changed me in many ways. Opened my eyes to new experiences. Learned to stand my ground. I’m a stronger person, I don’t let anyone walk over me. Embraced who I am and confident in myself.
Surprised to see you comment
It’s amazing what people can and will do once they have shared their stories about people on here "
That’s very true |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
" Fab hasn't changed me, but it has helped me explore who I am "
This is it for me too, it helped me explore who I was as a person, to see I wasn't who I was made to feel like for many years, and to find what I didn't know I was looking for
Tg x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
So lovely to read.
Fab hasn't really changed me, I am less likely to put up with crap from people and quite outspoken anyway.
Although Fab has boosted my sexual confidence, it has given me amazing experiences and allowed me to meet people I otherwise wouldn't of had it not been for Fab |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *humper. OP Man
over a year ago
northumberland/scotland |
"Dude!
How have I only just seen this post
Fair play.
We’re happy to share some aromatic crispy duck pancakes with you anytime.
But not in a ghey way "
Obviously not in a "ghey" way... come on now. Table for 3 it is though |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Dude!
How have I only just seen this post
Fair play.
We’re happy to share some aromatic crispy duck pancakes with you anytime.
But not in a ghey way
Obviously not in a "ghey" way... come on now. Table for 3 it is though "
Table for 4 would be better |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *humper. OP Man
over a year ago
northumberland/scotland |
"Dude!
How have I only just seen this post
Fair play.
We’re happy to share some aromatic crispy duck pancakes with you anytime.
But not in a ghey way
Obviously not in a "ghey" way... come on now. Table for 3 it is though
Table for 4 would be better "
SOLD.
cheque please!! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
