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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So I used to be incredibly active in my sex life in my 20s mid 30s now and I can go 2 3 weeks without masturbating and even when I feel the need I hardly ever finish, tried porn but that does nothing, have no problem getting hard, is this an age thing or something else |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Shit man. Hope I don't ever have that.
Have you got laid recently?
Nearly 35
Laid 35 times recently??  no wonder you don’t need to wank!!  "
Sorry I mean I'm 35yrs old |
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By *iss FuegoWoman
over a year ago
Wherever I lay my hat - Macedonia |
"Shit man. Hope I don't ever have that.
Have you got laid recently?
Nearly 35
Laid 35 times recently?? no wonder you don’t need to wank!!
Sorry I mean I'm 35yrs old"
That's why I tend to go younger  All down hill once a guy reaches his mid 30s |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Shit man. Hope I don't ever have that.
Have you got laid recently?
Nearly 35
Laid 35 times recently?? no wonder you don’t need to wank!!
Sorry I mean I'm 35yrs old"
Haha. I know.
My long story short. I do t feel sexy when my whole life around me is just work work work. Shop to eat. Get ready for another week of work etc.
all work and no play … blah blah blah. So a routine of wanking just becomes a habit I suppose and it just wasnt sexy for me anymore. So playing with myself took a hit, and it became exact like you described.
To do it now I need to be aroused in some way, and it’s rare. It’s normaly when a girl is in my head… again it is rare. *thanks fab haha
Maybe try and not worry about not enjoying it, and recognise what’s going on around you when you do?
(I know this is public, but I hate sending dms to dudes, and I hope this helps you put some things in perspective) |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Shit man. Hope I don't ever have that.
Have you got laid recently?
Nearly 35
Laid 35 times recently?? no wonder you don’t need to wank!!
Sorry I mean I'm 35yrs old
Haha. I know.
My long story short. I do t feel sexy when my whole life around me is just work work work. Shop to eat. Get ready for another week of work etc.
all work and no play … blah blah blah. So a routine of wanking just becomes a habit I suppose and it just wasnt sexy for me anymore. So playing with myself took a hit, and it became exact like you described.
To do it now I need to be aroused in some way, and it’s rare. It’s normaly when a girl is in my head… again it is rare. *thanks fab haha
Maybe try and not worry about not enjoying it, and recognise what’s going on around you when you do?
(I know this is public, but I hate sending dms to dudes, and I hope this helps you put some things in perspective) "
Great advice appreciated |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Shit man. Hope I don't ever have that.
Have you got laid recently?
Nearly 35
Laid 35 times recently?? no wonder you don’t need to wank!!
Sorry I mean I'm 35yrs old
That's why I tend to go younger All down hill once a guy reaches his mid 30s "
Don't think I'd have an issue with you |
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"So I used to be incredibly active in my sex life in my 20s mid 30s now and I can go 2 3 weeks without masturbating and even when I feel the need I hardly ever finish, tried porn but that does nothing, have no problem getting hard, is this an age thing or something else"
Welcome to middle-aged low libido.
I never thought it would happen to me but I've been out of a relationship for 9 years. I was in some intensive therapy during the pandemic and I was just mentally exhausted all of the time.
I totally get that part about starting a wank and cannot be arsed to finish.
Anyway long story short, I re-joined fab and started going to clubs to regain some sort of connection with my body and with others.
I thought I would panic the first time going to a nudist club/spa but I didn't and it just felt relaxing and freeing.
I also have a problem generally relaxing. My brain always defaults to over thinking. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think overthinking it will make it worse. Just try and abstain from thinking about anything sexual for as long as you can. Carry on doing you and I'm sure one day you'll wake up with an urge to blast what inevitably will be a humongous load.
But until that day, just carry on doing you!
|
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"Shit man. Hope I don't ever have that.
Have you got laid recently?
Nearly 35
Laid 35 times recently?? no wonder you don’t need to wank!!
Sorry I mean I'm 35yrs old
That's why I tend to go younger All down hill once a guy reaches his mid 30s "
She speaks the truth, just ask my aging knees. *Cries into coffee* |
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"Shit man. Hope I don't ever have that.
Have you got laid recently?
Nearly 35
Laid 35 times recently?? no wonder you don’t need to wank!!
Sorry I mean I'm 35yrs old
That's why I tend to go younger All down hill once a guy reaches his mid 30s
She speaks the truth, just ask my aging knees. *Cries into coffee*"
Just lie on your back...i'll do all the work...   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Shit man. Hope I don't ever have that.
Have you got laid recently?
Nearly 35
Laid 35 times recently?? no wonder you don’t need to wank!!
Sorry I mean I'm 35yrs old
That's why I tend to go younger All down hill once a guy reaches his mid 30s "
not for every man  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Shit man. Hope I don't ever have that.
Have you got laid recently?
Nearly 35
Laid 35 times recently?? no wonder you don’t need to wank!!
Sorry I mean I'm 35yrs old
That's why I tend to go younger All down hill once a guy reaches his mid 30s
She speaks the truth, just ask my aging knees. *Cries into coffee*
Just lie on your back...i'll do all the work... "
That'll work for me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think that's natural and we all have cycles when we are more interested in sex than others or at least I know i definitely do.
It's perfectly normal however it is worth considering whether there could be any medical reason that might need checking out, Also sometimes stress and anxiety can change our libiso maybe just something to think about. |
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By *ittleMissCaliWoman
over a year ago
trouble most likely, or creating it :) |
Right now mine has gone to zero. I know why... but I also have no idea how to fix it.. as I've had dips.. but feeling nothing is new to me.
I actually am worrying myself just now as not only has my mojo gone.. I'm wanting to just stay away from everyone... even friends. I am making excuses not to go anywhere or do anything beyond work and home.
I even failed to enjoy a recent trip to Italy as much as normal as felt so detached from myself.
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Right now mine has gone to zero. I know why... but I also have no idea how to fix it.. as I've had dips.. but feeling nothing is new to me.
I actually am worrying myself just now as not only has my mojo gone.. I'm wanting to just stay away from everyone... even friends. I am making excuses not to go anywhere or do anything beyond work and home.
I even failed to enjoy a recent trip to Italy as much as normal as felt so detached from myself.
"
Yes I'm exactly the same I don't want to go out or see anyone at the moment and feel really negative about everything |
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By *ittleMissCaliWoman
over a year ago
trouble most likely, or creating it :) |
"Right now mine has gone to zero. I know why... but I also have no idea how to fix it.. as I've had dips.. but feeling nothing is new to me.
I actually am worrying myself just now as not only has my mojo gone.. I'm wanting to just stay away from everyone... even friends. I am making excuses not to go anywhere or do anything beyond work and home.
I even failed to enjoy a recent trip to Italy as much as normal as felt so detached from myself.
Yes I'm exactly the same I don't want to go out or see anyone at the moment and feel really negative about everything "
I'm not feeling negative to everything. I've been getting on with other stuff in my life.. doing online courses, been away. Been working to pay for stuff I want to sort for next year... but I'm normally a total social butterfly... and just now I'm more like a caterpillar hiding in my cocoon. |
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"Shit man. Hope I don't ever have that.
Have you got laid recently?
Nearly 35
Laid 35 times recently?? no wonder you don’t need to wank!!
Sorry I mean I'm 35yrs old
That's why I tend to go younger All down hill once a guy reaches his mid 30s
She speaks the truth, just ask my aging knees. *Cries into coffee*
Just lie on your back...i'll do all the work...
That'll work for me"
Lol! the older you get the more you have to do work arounds in your sex life. I've got a dodgy knee so go to avoid putting pressure on that too much.
I remember watching an old couple in a documentary and old husband had a oral armchair and old wife had a special oral cushion for her knees. Lol! Good on them though! |
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"Right now mine has gone to zero. I know why... but I also have no idea how to fix it.. as I've had dips.. but feeling nothing is new to me.
I actually am worrying myself just now as not only has my mojo gone.. I'm wanting to just stay away from everyone... even friends. I am making excuses not to go anywhere or do anything beyond work and home.
I even failed to enjoy a recent trip to Italy as much as normal as felt so detached from myself.
"
Hugs... I felt really off this year but I've been in intensive therapy. Honestly, my club meets are helping. I'm such an uptight person in my non-sexual life and I don't have to be that way at the club. Or at least that works for me.
I always enjoy my vacations away though....so not enjoying your trips is unfortunate.
I can only suggest some somatic work and putting in routines to re-connect with your body and ...um...people....in a relaxed and fun environment. |
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"Right now mine has gone to zero. I know why... but I also have no idea how to fix it.. as I've had dips.. but feeling nothing is new to me.
I actually am worrying myself just now as not only has my mojo gone.. I'm wanting to just stay away from everyone... even friends. I am making excuses not to go anywhere or do anything beyond work and home.
I even failed to enjoy a recent trip to Italy as much as normal as felt so detached from myself.
Yes I'm exactly the same I don't want to go out or see anyone at the moment and feel really negative about everything "
Oh that's depression mate and it kills sex drive for sure.
I've had depression all my life and I have to battle daily not to slip into a deep one.
There's the meds route, there's the therapy route and there's the routine/structure route. I do a combination of all three. |
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"Right now mine has gone to zero. I know why... but I also have no idea how to fix it.. as I've had dips.. but feeling nothing is new to me.
I actually am worrying myself just now as not only has my mojo gone.. I'm wanting to just stay away from everyone... even friends. I am making excuses not to go anywhere or do anything beyond work and home.
I even failed to enjoy a recent trip to Italy as much as normal as felt so detached from myself.
Yes I'm exactly the same I don't want to go out or see anyone at the moment and feel really negative about everything I'm not feeling negative to everything. I've been getting on with other stuff in my life.. doing online courses, been away. Been working to pay for stuff I want to sort for next year... but I'm normally a total social butterfly... and just now I'm more like a caterpillar hiding in my cocoon. "
Burnout is a thing that I can slip into very easily. I like working on stuff and achieving things. It's a huge part of my self-validation and ego. However, I have to be careful that I don't overwork and that I do relaxing and fun things too.
It's worst in the winter because I hate feeling cold but going to the nudist spa does help me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I used to be incredibly active in my sex life in my 20s mid 30s now and I can go 2 3 weeks without masturbating and even when I feel the need I hardly ever finish, tried porn but that does nothing, have no problem getting hard, is this an age thing or something else"
I find the more sex I have the more I want. So the less I get...
Missy x |
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By *ittleMissCaliWoman
over a year ago
trouble most likely, or creating it :) |
"So I used to be incredibly active in my sex life in my 20s mid 30s now and I can go 2 3 weeks without masturbating and even when I feel the need I hardly ever finish, tried porn but that does nothing, have no problem getting hard, is this an age thing or something else
I find the more sex I have the more I want. So the less I get...
Missy x"
this is almost true with me.. but also my drive is linked to a connection I have with a someone.. when we have issues my mojo suffers x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I used to be incredibly active in my sex life in my 20s mid 30s now and I can go 2 3 weeks without masturbating and even when I feel the need I hardly ever finish, tried porn but that does nothing, have no problem getting hard, is this an age thing or something else
I find the more sex I have the more I want. So the less I get...
Missy x"
I can relate to this 100% |
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