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Corrupt a Nursery Rhyme
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By *allMeLex OP Man
over a year ago
Southampton |
The aim of the game is simple. Take a nursery rhyme, and corrupt it.
Here's one to start things off 
Old Mother Hubbard
Went to the cupboard
to fetch her poor dog a bone.
When she bent over
Up jumped Rover,
And gave her a bone of his own. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hey diddle diddle the dog had a poo allover somebodies bed the little cat laughed to see such fun so the dog had a shit on his head
Have that cat peoples  |
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"Little jack horner sat in a corner eating his blue berry pie. He didn’t look at the pretty girls but winked when the boys went by "
You beat me to a jack horner re-write
Little Jack horner sat in a corner
And played with his cock till it cum
He was still randy
And thought this is quite handy
And then stuck his thumb up his bum |
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By *allMeLex OP Man
over a year ago
Southampton |
Mary had a little watch
she swallowed it one day
and so she took some Epsom salts
to pass the time away
But though she tried, and tried, and tried
she couldn't make time pass
So if you want to know the time
just look up Mary's ass |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hey diddle diddle!
The wife did a piddle,
All over the kitchen floor.
The sub licked it up,
Then drank his own cum,
And the estate agent kicked them out of the open house viewing. |
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"Hey diddle diddle the dog had a poo allover somebodies bed the little cat laughed to see such fun so the dog had a shit on his head
Have that cat peoples "
Hey Diddle Diddle,
The cat did a piddle,
All over the kitchen mat.
The little dog laughed to see such fun,
And he piddled all over the cat! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The Grand Old Duke of York
He had ten thousand men
He also had some little girls
But "One does not remember them"
.
He told the BBC
That "One no longer sweats"
But his late mam gave 12 million quid
To a girl he's "never met" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ding dong Bell,
Pussy's in the well,
How can you tell?
By the bloody awful smell.
Who pulled her out?
Little Jonny Stout,
Took a sniff and then
Chucked her back again. |
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If you go down to the woods today, you're sure of a big surprise.
If you go down to the woods today, you're sure of a big surprise.
Because mum and dad are having a shag and uncle Frank is having a wank and auntie Flo is having a go with grandad. |
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If you go down in the woods today you’re in for a big surprise,
If you go down in the woods today you’d better close your eyes,
Cos Mam and dad are having a shag,
And uncle Bob is rubbing his knob,
And Aunty Flo is giving a blow to Graaaaaandad!
I was a very disturbed child! |
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By *TG3Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"If you go down in the woods today you’re in for a big surprise,
If you go down in the woods today you’d better close your eyes,
Cos Mam and dad are having a shag,
And uncle Bob is rubbing his knob,
And Aunty Flo is giving a blow to Graaaaaandad!
I was a very disturbed child!"
lol |
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By *eavenNhellCouple
over a year ago
carrbrook stalybridge |
mary had a little skirt was slit right up the side
when the boys came out to play they could see her thighs
judy had a little skirt it slit right up the front
she got suspended for being a slut ! |
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By *yron69Man
over a year ago
Fareham |
Baa, baa, black sheep,
Have you seen my tool?
Yes, sir, yes, sir,
Two balls full;
One for the master,
And for his dame,
And one for the big boy
Who lives down the lane. |
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"The aim of the game is simple. Take a nursery rhyme, and corrupt it.
Here's one to start things off
Old Mother Hubbard
Went to the cupboard
to fetch her poor dog a bone.
When she bent over
Up jumped Rover,
And gave her a bone of his own."
|
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By *yron69Man
over a year ago
Fareham |
Goosey goosey gander,
Whither shall I wander?
Upstairs and downstairs
And in my lady's chamber.
There I met an old man
Who wouldn't say his prayers,
So I took him by his left leg
And rodgered him on the stairs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sing a song of sixpence
With knickers full of cum
Must have had some anal
And splashed it on her bum
When her cuckold cleaned it
His face just looked the same
Now sit down there you filthy cunt
So I can do it all again |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What do you do if you can't find a loo
In an English country garden?
Find a spot in the sun to do a number one
In an English country garden
So pull down your pants and piss on all the plants
In an English country garden
Poo behind a log and blame it on the dog
In an English country garden
Pull off a leaf and wipe it underneath
In an English country garden
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Mary had a little lamb,
She tied it to a pylon,
10,000 volts went up it's bum
And turned it's wool to nylon.
Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
To fetch a pail of water
I don't know what they did up there
But now they have a daughter |
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"Hey diddle diddle!
The wife did a piddle,
All over the kitchen floor.
The sub licked it up,
Then drank his own cum,
And the estate agent kicked them out of the open house viewing."
Is this a true story ? It sounds likely in Brum |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Mary had a little dress
Split right up the side
Every time she wore it
The boys could see her thighs
Mary had another dress
Split right up the front
But she didn't wear that one"
 love it |
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By *lecom1Couple
over a year ago
Stornoway |
"Little boy blue come blow your horn the sheeps in the meadow the cows in the corn when is the boy who looks after the sheep. He’s in the haystack with little bow peep "
Little miss muffet
Sat on her tuffet
Her knickers all tattered and torn
It wasn't a spider that sat down beside her
It was little boy blue with the horn |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Jack and Jill went up the hill so jack could lick jills fanny. Jack got a shock and a mouth full of cock because jills a fucking tranny.
Hope this doesn’t get me a ban  |
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"Jack And Jill Went up the hill, So Jack could lick Jills fanny, all Jack got was a mouth full of cock Cause Jills real name is Danny."
A different variant ...
Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick Jill's fanny
When they got to the top
Jack had a shock
Cus Jill was a fucking tranny. |
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these are funny 
