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Confess your sins
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Sister Jennie Talia of the Convent of FAF is in the confessional.
Confess your sins and beg absolution. Suitable penances will be handed out for the sake of your mortal soul.
Amen |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Sister Jennie Talia of the Convent of FAF is in the confessional.
Confess your sins and beg absolution. Suitable penances will be handed out for the sake of your mortal soul.
Amen"
We are having a bathroom renovated at the moment and I want to shag the plumber. Bad.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Sadly - as I'm unable to actually succeed in getting any I am in no need of absolution xx "
We are all sinners. Denial is a sin.
I shall pray to St Jezebel the shameless for your soul. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Sister Jennie Talia of the Convent of FAF is in the confessional.
Confess your sins and beg absolution. Suitable penances will be handed out for the sake of your mortal soul.
Amen
We are having a bathroom renovated at the moment and I want to shag the plumber. Bad. "
To sin in thought is as sinful As a sin in deed.
An application (vigorously) of the Holy buttplug of Bishop Julian may cleanse you of this sin. Wicked child! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hallowed be thy name my kingdom come....... I had a hard on in the woods the other day can I be absolved  "
Meet me in the vestry after evensong, and I shall drive out the Demon that possesses your member. Some rapid and rhythmic strangulation of said member will expel the evil spirit in a gush of devils cream |
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"Hallowed be thy name my kingdom come....... I had a hard on in the woods the other day can I be absolved
Meet me in the vestry after evensong, and I shall drive out the Demon that possesses your member. Some rapid and rhythmic strangulation of said member will expel the evil spirit in a gush of devils cream"
lol thank you..... Oh lord  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hallowed be thy name my kingdom come....... I had a hard on in the woods the other day can I be absolved
Meet me in the vestry after evensong, and I shall drive out the Demon that possesses your member. Some rapid and rhythmic strangulation of said member will expel the evil spirit in a gush of devils creamlol thank you..... Oh lord "
Amen brother, amen |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I looked i was glad yet now im not
Nothing gives more gladness than a sinner who repents.
Do you repent?no i rinse and repeat
I weep for your soul"
dont worry i gave it away long ago if i still had it id have sold it to satan anyway |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sister Jennie I have no sins as I am a angel
Satan!
Get thee behind me.
(And whilst you are there ...)"
Ha ha happy to return the favour Jennie if you do the honours first
We can play my favourite game off switch
Set a timmer ever 5-10 minutes we switch roles first to tap tops the rest off the night
Are you game  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Mr has a Lego addiction… getting slightly concerned that his fondness for bricks will get out of hand."
Lodging a brick under his foreskin whilst flogging him with the whip of our living Saint Jenifique will scourge his sins from him |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Sister Jennie I have no sins as I am a angel
Satan!
Get thee behind me.
(And whilst you are there ...)
Ha ha happy to return the favour Jennie if you do the honours first
We can play my favourite game off switch
Set a timmer ever 5-10 minutes we switch roles first to tap tops the rest off the night
Are you game "
Temptation!
Sinful temptress!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Sister Jennie I have no sins as I am a angel
Satan!
Get thee behind me.
(And whilst you are there ...)
Ha ha happy to return the favour Jennie if you do the honours first
We can play my favourite game off switch
Set a timmer ever 5-10 minutes we switch roles first to tap tops the rest off the night
Are you game
Temptation!
Sinful temptress!
"
Pleasrer isn’t sinful and
I am just a bundle off temptation |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Should have know it was you sister
With this thread never mind baking .OK I confess I ordered a egg mayo sandwich today .it had no egg in it .
I couldn't be arsed complaining ."
No one should eat that which comes from a hen's vagina.
You had a lucky escape. |
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I have enjoyed all things of sense and rapture, and feared not that any god should deny me of this. So, nothing to confess apart from using my free will as divinely granted.
(And if my will was divinely granted, then by extension all my actions have been divine, and boy do you not know the half of it) 
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I have enjoyed all things of sense and rapture, and feared not that any god should deny me of this. So, nothing to confess apart from using my free will as divinely granted.
(And if my will was divinely granted, then by extension all my actions have been divine, and boy do you not know the half of it)
"
This has a ring of Alistair Crowley about it.
You ever considered becoming ordained in the Church of FAF? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Sister Jennie Talia of the Convent of FAF is in the confessional.
Confess your sins and beg absolution. Suitable penances will be handed out for the sake of your mortal soul.
Amen"
How long have you got ! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Sister Jennie Talia of the Convent of FAF is in the confessional.
Confess your sins and beg absolution. Suitable penances will be handed out for the sake of your mortal soul.
Amen
How long have you got ! "
Eternity |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Sister Jennie Talia of the Convent of FAF is in the confessional.
Confess your sins and beg absolution. Suitable penances will be handed out for the sake of your mortal soul.
Amen
How long have you got !
Eternity"
Ah well not long enough for my sins then take infinity eternity for all my sins
And that’s just this year  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Sister Jennie Talia of the Convent of FAF is in the confessional.
Confess your sins and beg absolution. Suitable penances will be handed out for the sake of your mortal soul.
Amen
How long have you got !
Eternity
Ah well not long enough for my sins then take infinity eternity for all my sins
And that’s just this year "
Wicked sinner.
Be sure they will find you out! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Sister Jennie Talia of the Convent of FAF is in the confessional.
Confess your sins and beg absolution. Suitable penances will be handed out for the sake of your mortal soul.
Amen
How long have you got !
Eternity
Ah well not long enough for my sins then take infinity eternity for all my sins
And that’s just this year
Wicked sinner.
Be sure they will find you out!"
They always do !
Thing is you only live once life is for living
Have good evening |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Sister Jennie Talia of the Convent of FAF is in the confessional.
Confess your sins and beg absolution. Suitable penances will be handed out for the sake of your mortal soul.
Amen
How long have you got !
Eternity
Ah well not long enough for my sins then take infinity eternity for all my sins
And that’s just this year
Wicked sinner.
Be sure they will find you out!
They always do !
Thing is you only live once life is for living
Have good evening "
I shall spend it in contemplation and self flagellation |
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"
This has a ring of Alistair Crowley about it.
You ever considered becoming ordained in the Church of FAF?"
There may be an element of Crowley's Thelema in there. A genuinely disturbed man, but with some fleeting flashes of inspiration. A charlatan in some eyes, and a prophet in others. I am of the opinion he was both. Essentially flawed like the rest of us.
Now, what path does ordination take, Sister ?
Highly ritualised, with a bit of Latin thrown in, some good old-fashioned self-loathing and guilt and a donation to the silver platter, or are we going ultra-modern with colanders on our heads and a bathtub full of jelly ?
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Sister Jennie, help me please for I have sinned 
I have taken another unto serve me and made him perform....indescribable acts.
Despite his pleasure, I know I have sinned for there is a wet....well I am sure I don't need to confess that!
Save me from the within. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Sister Jennie Talia of the Convent of FAF is in the confessional.
Confess your sins and beg absolution. Suitable penances will be handed out for the sake of your mortal soul.
Amen
How long have you got !
Eternity
Ah well not long enough for my sins then take infinity eternity for all my sins
And that’s just this year
Wicked sinner.
Be sure they will find you out!
They always do !
Thing is you only live once life is for living
Have good evening
I shall spend it in contemplation and self flagellation "
I do a lot quite enjoyable |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Sorry Jennie but I've been a good girl today x
Oh really?
Search your soul before answering."
Busted! I forgot I sinned last Wednesday by going to a team leader at work to tell him my colleague couldn't be bothered doing any work. Happy now?  |
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"Sadly - as I'm unable to actually succeed in getting any I am in no need of absolution xx
We are all sinners. Denial is a sin.
I shall pray to St Jezebel the shameless for your soul."
I hope they hear your prayers xx |
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Sister Jenni, I wish to confess my sins.
I wore the sacred strap-on of St. Morphiata of the 7 dildos, took photos, sent them to lots as guys and made them cry
Now they won't play with me.
I have sent a picture so you can guage my punishment.
Please grant me absolution for my fun...oopps I mean sins |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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Oh I have something I want to confess.
I'm really rather proud of it.
It's also got a touch of debauchery surrounding it.
I helped (let's say helped) someone achieve a first this weekend.
Their growl of pure frustrated lust was well worth it.
I'm probably going to hell now but thought I'd confess it anyway. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh I have something I want to confess.
I'm really rather proud of it.
It's also got a touch of debauchery surrounding it.
I helped (let's say helped) someone achieve a first this weekend.
Their growl of pure frustrated lust was well worth it.
I'm probably going to hell now but thought I'd confess it anyway. "
You know when you confess you have to actually you know, say what you're confessing |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"Oh I have something I want to confess.
I'm really rather proud of it.
It's also got a touch of debauchery surrounding it.
I helped (let's say helped) someone achieve a first this weekend.
Their growl of pure frustrated lust was well worth it.
I'm probably going to hell now but thought I'd confess it anyway.
You know when you confess you have to actually you know, say what you're confessing "
Shush, no you don't. I've confessed enough for it to be a confession of sorts. An adequate one. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Sorry Jennie but I've been a good girl today x
Oh really?
Search your soul before answering.
Busted! I forgot I sinned last Wednesday by going to a team leader at work to tell him my colleague couldn't be bothered doing any work. Happy now? "
No.
The mortal peril this puts your soul in saddens me. Bare your sinful breasts and await me in the vestry that I may .... well I won't go into that now |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Sister Jennie, help me please for I have sinned
I have taken another unto serve me and made him perform....indescribable acts.
Despite his pleasure, I know I have sinned for there is a wet....well I am sure I don't need to confess that!
Save me from the within."
Oh my poor misled lamb.
Just to be sure I prescribe the correct pennance I shall require you to demonstrate to me the sinful behaviour to which you refer. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Sister Jenni, I wish to confess my sins.
I wore the sacred strap-on of St. Morphiata of the 7 dildos, took photos, sent them to lots as guys and made them cry
Now they won't play with me.
I have sent a picture so you can guage my punishment.
Please grant me absolution for my fun...oopps I mean sins"
One of the worst cases of lutfulness I have had the dishonour to hear of! I should .... oh, I appear to have dropped something and must bend over to pick it up
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I fucked my bosses wife last week while he was on a business trip. Mature lady with an extremely healthy appetite for cock "
Gasp!
You are eternally damned!
Unless .... maybe Sister Jennie's Saintly mouth could cleanse your wayward member of its sins? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Oh I have something I want to confess.
I'm really rather proud of it.
It's also got a touch of debauchery surrounding it.
I helped (let's say helped) someone achieve a first this weekend.
Their growl of pure frustrated lust was well worth it.
I'm probably going to hell now but thought I'd confess it anyway.
You know when you confess you have to actually you know, say what you're confessing "
Fab be praised Mr32.
You are indeed truly enlightened and what you say is divine wisdom |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Oh I have something I want to confess.
I'm really rather proud of it.
It's also got a touch of debauchery surrounding it.
I helped (let's say helped) someone achieve a first this weekend.
Their growl of pure frustrated lust was well worth it.
I'm probably going to hell now but thought I'd confess it anyway.
You know when you confess you have to actually you know, say what you're confessing
Shush, no you don't. I've confessed enough for it to be a confession of sorts. An adequate one. "
Alas my poor misled lamb, brother 32 speaks the Holy truth |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I seriously doubt I'll get absolution, I've broke 4 of the 10 Commandments and committed 2 of the deadly sins and that's just today. "
One more for the hat trick.
You win a set of communion goblets for the trio! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Fuck that shite, Hell sounds way more fun "
Tempteth thou the righteous from the straight and narrow path? The avenging fist of righteousness needs inserting I feel.
Now where did I leave the lube? |
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"I seriously doubt I'll get absolution, I've broke 4 of the 10 Commandments and committed 2 of the deadly sins and that's just today.
One more for the hat trick.
You win a set of communion goblets for the trio!"
Well the fact I want the goblets is greed, so I think by default that makes 3, which makes me proud, so that should be 4. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I seriously doubt I'll get absolution, I've broke 4 of the 10 Commandments and committed 2 of the deadly sins and that's just today.
One more for the hat trick.
You win a set of communion goblets for the trio!
Well the fact I want the goblets is greed, so I think by default that makes 3, which makes me proud, so that should be 4."
We have a winner!
Oh erm ... I mean ... sinful sinner! Say a bunch of Hail Hairys or whatever |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I fucked a married woman in her home whilst her husband was at work today, can I repent or is it straight to hell for me "
Your soul is indeed in peril. But fear not. Kneel before me in repentance, close your eyes. Good, well done - now open your mouth and ..... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I am chatting with a really great gorgeous guy ...thing is it turns out he is the same age as one if my kids. He's 35 and I want him  "
Oh this is an easy one my sister in sin. Message one dozen single men randomly with a photo of your heathen female parts and the word FAF. The resulting messages will becm sufficient to deter your lustfulness.
Oh and whilst you are at it you should probably send the same picture to a random Transvestite Nun too |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have nothing to confess. My soul is clean and pure
Unlike your cock. Word is amongst the Sisters of FAF that you atexquite the fornicator "
Right, which one blabbed to you?  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I have nothing to confess. My soul is clean and pure
Unlike your cock. Word is amongst the Sisters of FAF that you atexquite the fornicator
Right, which one blabbed to you? "
FAB works in mysterious ways. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Fuck that shite, Hell sounds way more fun
Tempteth thou the righteous from the straight and narrow path? The avenging fist of righteousness needs inserting I feel.
Now where did I leave the lube?"
I don't remember bible quotes being that fucking hot
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I confessed some of my sins at the weekend and scared the shit out of someone I’ve known for a while.
Keeping them to myself seems safer for all  "
Refuse redemption and condemn thyself to eternity in hell! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Dear Sister Jennie,
I coveted my colleague's bakery products. Save me!!
Yours truly,
Mrs KC"
Lust for the crust?
A craving for the baking?
Present yourself naked in front of the pulpit so that the Novices can pelt you with éclairs for your wickedness. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I am having lustful thoughts,dirty images fill my mind constantly ,I am wicked"
How dirty?
Meet me in the confessional so you can whisper your filth to me. |
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Well, I once got so angry at a friend that I actually threw my own shit at him in fit of rage.
Never the best thing to deliberately annoy someone when they are trying to take a dump.
It missed him by centimetres, by the way... |
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"I am chatting with a really great gorgeous guy ...thing is it turns out he is the same age as one if my kids. He's 35 and I want him
Oh this is an easy one my sister in sin. Message one dozen single men randomly with a photo of your heathen female parts and the word FAF. The resulting messages will becm sufficient to deter your lustfulness.
Oh and whilst you are at it you should probably send the same picture to a random Transvestite Nun too "
Oh wise and wonderful one. Your insight leaves me open mouthed in shear admiration!
That is indeed punishment for the filthy thoughts that take me over!
I have such a Transvestite Nun in mind although, not random I know ( more punishment required).
Should I ever find myself before them I will once again need confession and punishment for the filthy thoughts I know will abound me as I kneel before them taking absolution.
They are very capable of taking me in hand! |
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"Well, I once got so angry at a friend that I actually threw my own shit at him in fit of rage.
Never the best thing to deliberately annoy someone when they are trying to take a dump.
It missed him by centimetres, by the way..."
Noo... really! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I am chatting with a really great gorgeous guy ...thing is it turns out he is the same age as one if my kids. He's 35 and I want him
Oh this is an easy one my sister in sin. Message one dozen single men randomly with a photo of your heathen female parts and the word FAF. The resulting messages will becm sufficient to deter your lustfulness.
Oh and whilst you are at it you should probably send the same picture to a random Transvestite Nun too
Oh wise and wonderful one. Your insight leaves me open mouthed in shear admiration!
That is indeed punishment for the filthy thoughts that take me over!
I have such a Transvestite Nun in mind although, not random I know ( more punishment required).
Should I ever find myself before them I will once again need confession and punishment for the filthy thoughts I know will abound me as I kneel before them taking absolution.
They are very capable of taking me in hand! "
You had me at open mouthed.
Hallelujah |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Well, I once got so angry at a friend that I actually threw my own shit at him in fit of rage.
Never the best thing to deliberately annoy someone when they are trying to take a dump.
It missed him by centimetres, by the way..."
The spreading of effluent can be seen as an allegory for the stinking filth of sin spreading like a stain.
You are blessed for providing me with this parable |
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"I am chatting with a really great gorgeous guy ...thing is it turns out he is the same age as one if my kids. He's 35 and I want him
Oh this is an easy one my sister in sin. Message one dozen single men randomly with a photo of your heathen female parts and the word FAF. The resulting messages will becm sufficient to deter your lustfulness.
Oh and whilst you are at it you should probably send the same picture to a random Transvestite Nun too
Oh wise and wonderful one. Your insight leaves me open mouthed in shear admiration!
That is indeed punishment for the filthy thoughts that take me over!
I have such a Transvestite Nun in mind although, not random I know ( more punishment required).
Should I ever find myself before them I will once again need confession and punishment for the filthy thoughts I know will abound me as I kneel before them taking absolution.
They are very capable of taking me in hand!
You had me at open mouthed.
Hallelujah "
Amen |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I have (temporarily) repudiated my octopus. May God have mercy on my soul"
Does ot not state in the appendix to the Apocrypha "And most sacred of all the molluscs shall be the mollusc known as the octopus, deny the octopus at your peril."
Thinkest you that I have forgotten your input to my last confessional session?
Witch, heathen, heretic.
The hair proves it! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I fancy the pants off my brother in law "
To lay with to husband of thine own sister is a hateful sin to desire as much is also an abhorrence.
(Primarily due to the holy shite storm that would result from discovery)
I shall have to anoint your offending lady parts with Abbess Crumpet's Chilli Powder balm. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Indulging in HomeDogging™
(Otherwise known as dinner and a couple of glasses of wine while sat on the sofa watching korean drama netflix. But I do have my DoggingBlanket™ to keep me warm.)"
An act of purity and grace.
You, my sister, are an inspiration to us all.
Amen. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Hi Jennie can you absolve me of my sins I have a hard on and I can't leave it alone "
Smear thy offending member with bovril and stand naked in the local dogs home.
That will quash you ardour |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"my sin is money - you will understand this if you know what the word sin means"
Sun is un many forms and fro many sources.
Can anyone else smell that?
Yes that's right... the stench of sin.
May Fab preserve us. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Well nothing to confess. Guess I be burning in hell.  "
To deny thy sinful ways is to condemn thyself to a vanilla eternity of monogamous missionary position and premature ejaculation.
Repent. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well nothing to confess. Guess I be burning in hell.
To deny thy sinful ways is to condemn thyself to a vanilla eternity of monogamous missionary position and premature ejaculation.
Repent."
Let me burn .. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'd use up too much of your time I think .. I'm beyond redemption "
In that case, meet me round the back of the Rectory after evensong and let me see how far beyond redemption you are |
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By *ames-77Man
over a year ago
milton keynes |
Fuck me these confessions of people saying what they wish they had done or are fantasising about .. done most of them .. what you have isn't sins they are thoughts.. sins are when you be the cunt that makes them happen .. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Would of loved to of shagged mother in-law 10 years ago"
A sin in thought is still a sin.
Slam thy member in the church door four and twenty times whilst chanting a hail hairy for each slam.
Evil sinful heathen |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Fuck me these confessions of people saying what they wish they had done or are fantasising about .. done most of them .. what you have isn't sins they are thoughts.. sins are when you be the cunt that makes them happen .. "
Oh my poor deluded lamb.
The road to hell is paved with lewd thoughts as well a lewd deeds.
You poison words risk dragging the pure from the opath of righteousness. Your mouth should be washed clean with Sister Jennie's blessed emission. Open wide and close your eyes. It stings like a bastard if that stuff goes in them! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Would of loved to of shagged mother in-law 10 years ago
A sin in thought is still a sin.
Slam thy member in the church door four and twenty times whilst chanting a hail hairy for each slam.
Evil sinful heathen"
10yrs ago she was worth the punishment not so much now |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Would of loved to of shagged mother in-law 10 years ago
A sin in thought is still a sin.
Slam thy member in the church door four and twenty times whilst chanting a hail hairy for each slam.
Evil sinful heathen
10yrs ago she was worth the punishment not so much now"
Strange.
She says the same of you! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Would of loved to of shagged mother in-law 10 years ago
A sin in thought is still a sin.
Slam thy member in the church door four and twenty times whilst chanting a hail hairy for each slam.
Evil sinful heathen
10yrs ago she was worth the punishment not so much now
Strange.
She says the same of you!"
Haha I bet so too |
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By *ames-77Man
over a year ago
milton keynes |
"Fuck me these confessions of people saying what they wish they had done or are fantasising about .. done most of them .. what you have isn't sins they are thoughts.. sins are when you be the cunt that makes them happen ..
Oh my poor deluded lamb.
The road to hell is paved with lewd thoughts as well a lewd deeds.
You poison words risk dragging the pure from the opath of righteousness. Your mouth should be washed clean with Sister Jennie's blessed emission. Open wide and close your eyes. It stings like a bastard if that stuff goes in them!"
Sister jennie's cock isn't shooting any cum at me I'm afraid |
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"I can’t help but lust after my gf’s sister
Ah divine symmetry because it is known that your sisters girlfriend lusts after you.
So much lust.
He gets this and I get the chilli balm for my lady parts?
"
|
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"Fuck me these confessions of people saying what they wish they had done or are fantasising about .. done most of them .. what you have isn't sins they are thoughts.. sins are when you be the cunt that makes them happen ..
Oh my poor deluded lamb.
The road to hell is paved with lewd thoughts as well a lewd deeds.
You poison words risk dragging the pure from the opath of righteousness. Your mouth should be washed clean with Sister Jennie's blessed emission. Open wide and close your eyes. It stings like a bastard if that stuff goes in them!"
does yours have acid in it then? |
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