Have a couple of nights out with friends and try to forget about her, whilst concentrating on the company of friends and enjoying yourself.
Yes, it takes time, but you may get over it sooner than you think. Best of luck. |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
Tbh there is no quick fix. Depending on the length, quality and nature of the relationship you will need to go through a sort of "grieving process" which will gradually ease and you will be ok.
Shortcuts, for example throwing yourself into another "relationship" will not work as you have not processed the whole thing. It will affect the new relationship and not make you happy long term.
A lot of people bypass the grieving and processing as it feels less painful but long-term it leaves more scarring. |
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By *lexV16Man
over a year ago
Welling |
"Just broke up whats the best way to get her of my mind"
Are you sure it’s over for good? They have tendency to get back.
Get your self among good friend or two and chat about everything and nothing. Ask them to punch you on a face if you try to call her or reply to her text |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Others have said unfortunately there is no quick fix. If you need a couple of days to wallow then absolutely do that just be careful that doesn't turn in to a few weeks. It is going to be hard I'm sure but maybe after a couple of days try to take things easy,keep busy and distracte yourself whilst giving yourself space to reflect and grieve. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would say time is needed to process the break up. The first week or so is often worst. Try to keep busy...talk to people in your life for support...
Xx |
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Thank you, ive never actually used this site for sex was never quite sure if it was just the sex i needed, then i found a woman 25 years older then me in the 'real world' and its been the best 6 months of my life, and just slotted into the husband role in the house and it is that which i am missing the date nights sitting on sofa cooking cleaning house chores etc and i do feel there is no way back. |
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"Thank you, ive never actually used this site for sex was never quite sure if it was just the sex i needed, then i found a woman 25 years older then me in the 'real world' and its been the best 6 months of my life, and just slotted into the husband role in the house and it is that which i am missing the date nights sitting on sofa cooking cleaning house chores etc and i do feel there is no way back."
So sorry you're going through this |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Thank you, ive never actually used this site for sex was never quite sure if it was just the sex i needed, then i found a woman 25 years older then me in the 'real world' and its been the best 6 months of my life, and just slotted into the husband role in the house and it is that which i am missing the date nights sitting on sofa cooking cleaning house chores etc and i do feel there is no way back."
I am really sorry to hear that, that really sucks. x |
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"Just broke up whats the best way to get her of my mind
Are you sure it’s over for good? They have tendency to get back.
Get your self among good friend or two and chat about everything and nothing. Ask them to punch you on a face if you try to call her or reply to her text "
Not true in my case. The love of my life married and had kids with someone else and i haven't seen him for years |
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i know, bless her though she did really try to make it work, i noticed little things in past couple of weeks then she said she needed space then yesterday said it was over were not on the same page? |
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Yer i reckon so she needed a bit of time off between us couple of weeks back, lasted two days until she messaged me back saying shes missed me but its not been the same, then yesterday said its over were not on the same page dont contact me. |
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By *lexV16Man
over a year ago
Welling |
"Just broke up whats the best way to get her of my mind
Are you sure it’s over for good? They have tendency to get back.
Not true in my case. The love of my life married and had kids with someone else and i haven't seen him for years"
Yeah, I know. I was a bit sarcastic, apologies to OP and you if that was too much. My ex is with someone else and getting married soon too. No attempts from either of us to get back together since break up. However I’ve seen that couple of times with my friends and it didn’t work but worsen the struggle even more.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Op. There’s no answer I can give you that can help you.
But I can say, it gets easier as time moves in. Things become clearer for you.
But is my ex out of my head 12 months after it was over? Hell no. Do I get upset when things ring a reminder? Hell yes.
Dig in,
It took me a looong time to remember who I was and started to be that person again. I suggest you do it a lot quicker than I did, or you’ll waste 6 months sat in a sofa staring at a wall and you’ll never get that time back.
Or get under someone else, that could work too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks for the replies, it took my mind away for a short while"
I'm sorry OP. You'll find it gets easier in time... time is a wonderful thing. I hope you'll find someone special again some day. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Cliché but so true, time is the only healer you’ll need in those case.
And maybe driving a Ford fiesta at 30mph in city centers that requires you to drive at 29mph. |
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"Just broke up whats the best way to get her of my mind"
°
Come and say Hello on this evening's Nocturnal Thread, in the lounge (10.00pm). Hugs and solidarity prevail amongst the nocturnal fellowship. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Get yourself on your mind. Do things you haven't attempted in a while, walk - it helps with stress levels - and enjoy nature, woodland or water front, accept help when offered, don't say no to friends who try to cheer you up, focus on making yourself feeling good about you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Depends how ingrained in your mind she is if the force is strong you never do
All the talk of time you will no doubt see tho i disagree with it simply depends on the person but in my experience time is a thief not a healer it only takes |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"oh shes certainly left an imprint, she gave me a taste of everything i wanted and now its all been took away."
If you are replying to a specific post use the reply and quote button It makes it easier to know who you are replying to and the conversation flows better. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i know its just in the short term, mind is all over the place ive been high on love and now its all gone. "
What little things normally make you feel a little bit better even just for a short time? |
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"oh shes certainly left an imprint, she gave me a taste of everything i wanted and now its all been took away.
If you are replying to a specific post use the reply and quote button It makes it easier to know who you are replying to and the conversation flows better. X"
Sorry new to this much appreciated
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"oh shes certainly left an imprint, she gave me a taste of everything i wanted and now its all been took away.
If you are replying to a specific post use the reply and quote button It makes it easier to know who you are replying to and the conversation flows better. X
Sorry new to this much appreciated
"
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"i know its just in the short term, mind is all over the place ive been high on love and now its all gone.
What little things normally make you feel a little bit better even just for a short time? "
Football but cant play due to a hip injury, not much tv gets me going so maybe have to read a book or podcast, or get back on the weights. its just difficult to occupy my mind when i keep thinking what i had and how much i enjoyed it all. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
It's difficult OP. A part of you will be grieving and love doesn't disappear overnight shortly.
Do little things that bring you joy. Talk to friends. Family. Those who care about you. Allow yourself space and time to be sad but try and not be too consumed by the sad.
I hope things are better for you soon, x |
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"It's difficult OP. A part of you will be grieving and love doesn't disappear overnight shortly.
Do little things that bring you joy. Talk to friends. Family. Those who care about you. Allow yourself space and time to be sad but try and not be too consumed by the sad.
I hope things are better for you soon, x"
Thank you i will do my best |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Realise the next best thing is around the corner!
It honestly is, not sure how many times you've been in broken up relationships but you can ALWAYS find another! |
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"Realise the next best thing is around the corner!
It honestly is, not sure how many times you've been in broken up relationships but you can ALWAYS find another!"
Cheers pal will have to go for some long walks, a fair few times but none have felt like this thats why i cant seem to get my head around it |
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By *mightyMan
over a year ago
Scarborough |
Don’t fret iv been 2yrs abstent my bairn comes first over anything sex partners included if he’s not around then I’m usually at work or sat on plane going somewhere
summa will come along plenty fish left in the sea otherwise find summa to grasp & focus on it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My advice would be to process it properly, meaning if you try to stop thinking about something the more you will think of the thing you're trying not to think about..
..what lessons would you take from this relationship into the next?
..how can you use the experience to grow as a human being?
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"My advice would be to process it properly, meaning if you try to stop thinking about something the more you will think of the thing you're trying not to think about..
..what lessons would you take from this relationship into the next?
..how can you use the experience to grow as a human being?
"
I think thats where im going wrong im trying to get her out of my mind but like you say i just think of her and our time together which was always good. Im not sure probably do the exact same, things were going so well then 2 weeks back she said she needed time to think then came back 2 days later saying shes missed me then the other day she just says were not on the same page gave me no clue as to what page i was on then said leave me alone? |
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"How long were you together? Sometimes people say we're not on the same page when they mean they want different things..marriage, kids, house, that stuff"
Just under a year, i think now looking at it, she was 24 years older and i dont think she could come to terms with the gap, i feel she thought i was better off with someone my own age so we could grow together whilst she has been there and done that with one child only a few years younger, so probably not on the same page but im a couple of chapters behind. |
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Update im doing fine now, especially considering the reason she split up is she is getting back with an ex fiance who cheated on her several times split up, came back left her on xmas day for the same women but now split up again so shes got back with him, more fool her.
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Update im doing fine now, especially considering the reason she split up is she is getting back with an ex fiance who cheated on her several times split up, came back left her on xmas day for the same women but now split up again so shes got back with him, more fool her.
"
Sounds like you had a close escape , be thankful you didn’t end up with that one |
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"Update im doing fine now, especially considering the reason she split up is she is getting back with an ex fiance who cheated on her several times split up, came back left her on xmas day for the same women but now split up again so shes got back with him, more fool her.
Sounds like you had a close escape , be thankful you didn’t end up with that one "
i know cheers pal, i just dont get it but hey good luck to them both maybe its 3rd time lucky for them both, clearly likes the drama |
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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
"Update im doing fine now, especially considering the reason she split up is she is getting back with an ex fiance who cheated on her several times split up, came back left her on xmas day for the same women but now split up again so shes got back with him, more fool her.
"
It's nice to hear that you are doing well or ok even it's horrible when things like this happening but we all learn from mistakes regardless how things are but it's knowing or even excepting that we are better off rather than be taken granted for.
Keep your chin up |
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"Update im doing fine now, especially considering the reason she split up is she is getting back with an ex fiance who cheated on her several times split up, came back left her on xmas day for the same women but now split up again so shes got back with him, more fool her.
Cheers pal, it just came out of nowhere the dumping hit me like a sledgehammer then i got told about her ex being back on the scene and it all made sense so dodged a bullet onto new pastures for me
It's nice to hear that you are doing well or ok even it's horrible when things like this happening but we all learn from mistakes regardless how things are but it's knowing or even excepting that we are better off rather than be taken granted for.
Keep your chin up "
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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
Cheers pal, it just came out of nowhere the dumping hit me like a sledgehammer then i got told about her ex being back on the scene and it all made sense so dodged a bullet onto new pastures for me
On a positive side I'd say it's better you found out now rather than much later it's a horrible experience to go through but given how much you already know you should be thinking you've definitely had a lucky escape. Might be a time she might come running back but just remember what she did as you meant nothing at that time nobody is second best |
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"Some people prefer the better devil you know and the bond you make with someone you spent alot of time with. "
But surely the pain and grief that person put you through how can you just accept them back, i personally dont think i could welcome someone back who treated me with no dignity |
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