FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Is stress accepted as Reason for absence from work?
Is stress accepted as Reason for absence from work?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I haven't been paid by an agency and ben diddled nearly 800 quid.
I changed agencies, and the New agency has witheld payment of 1st weeks wages.
Is it reasonable grounds to report in sick with stress as im really struggling to make ends meet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes it is reasonable grounds.
As an agency worker would you get paid? Why has your first weeks wages been withheld?"
Agencies always pay a week one week later . Always .
Work get paied . No work no pay . There is no sick pays or hollidays ( unless u work under a contract that pays holiday money ) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
"
you haven’t a clue pal i bet you use words like man the fuck up |
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… in the porn industry? Ha, does anyone ever pull a sickie in the porn industry lol?
“Oh no, that hot bird I’m shooting a scene with tomorrow is really dull. I can’t do it man! Fuck it, I’ll say I’ve got bird flu!” 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
you haven’t a clue pal i bet you use words like man the fuck up "
Oh no not a clue me lad. Probably got more of a clue than most.
But this world has created weak people. Who can’t take responsibility for their own life choices. Always looking for an easy way out or sympathy. Think generations before ours were not stressed think they had a good time no. But they didn’t sit and moan about it. They pulled their socks on and did what was required. It’s fucking pathetic. |
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"… in the porn industry? Ha, does anyone ever pull a sickie in the porn industry lol?
“Oh no, that hot bird I’m shooting a scene with tomorrow is really dull. I can’t do it man! Fuck it, I’ll say I’ve got bird flu!”
"
I’d imagine if they where due to do a a shoot with Ron Jeremy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I haven't been paid by an agency and ben diddled nearly 800 quid.
I changed agencies, and the New agency has witheld payment of 1st weeks wages.
Is it reasonable grounds to report in sick with stress as im really struggling to make ends meet"
Yes that’s fair. I’m not sure if it’s universally de jure here that they have to respect that though. |
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
you haven’t a clue pal i bet you use words like man the fuck up
Oh no not a clue me lad. Probably got more of a clue than most.
But this world has created weak people. Who can’t take responsibility for their own life choices. Always looking for an easy way out or sympathy. Think generations before ours were not stressed think they had a good time no. But they didn’t sit and moan about it. They pulled their socks on and did what was required. It’s fucking pathetic. "
I was referring to the op in the comment about you not having a fucking clue you don’t know what’s going on in his life |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I haven't been paid by an agency and ben diddled nearly 800 quid.
I changed agencies, and the New agency has witheld payment of 1st weeks wages.
Is it reasonable grounds to report in sick with stress as im really struggling to make ends meet"
Mental health is a valid reason under employment law to be off work. I’d recommend contacting ACAS for some employment law advice so you know your rights, and if you can access some support to help you - eg through your GP or something, I’d recommend that too. Hope you get things sorted out, and remember everything can be fixed
F (Mrs) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
you haven’t a clue pal i bet you use words like man the fuck up
Oh no not a clue me lad. Probably got more of a clue than most.
But this world has created weak people. Who can’t take responsibility for their own life choices. Always looking for an easy way out or sympathy. Think generations before ours were not stressed think they had a good time no. But they didn’t sit and moan about it. They pulled their socks on and did what was required. It’s fucking pathetic. I was referring to the op in the comment about you not having a fucking clue you don’t know what’s going on in his life "
No not a clue but it’s his life he has the power and control over it.
But silly me for thinking that, doesn’t get sick pay he made that decision, probably half the work force are stressed, so all of them go sick yeh. You own your life if your are stressed it’s your stress address it and sort it out. Instead of looking for other people to cover your slack while you expect free money. |
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
"
Stop it..
Suicide is one of the biggest causes of death in younger men, bullshit attitudes such as you are spouting simply belong in a cave..
No one is going to fuck you for acting like a neanderthal..
Just stop it.. |
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
you haven’t a clue pal i bet you use words like man the fuck up
Oh no not a clue me lad. Probably got more of a clue than most.
But this world has created weak people. Who can’t take responsibility for their own life choices. Always looking for an easy way out or sympathy. Think generations before ours were not stressed think they had a good time no. But they didn’t sit and moan about it. They pulled their socks on and did what was required. It’s fucking pathetic. I was referring to the op in the comment about you not having a fucking clue you don’t know what’s going on in his life
No not a clue but it’s his life he has the power and control over it.
But silly me for thinking that, doesn’t get sick pay he made that decision, probably half the work force are stressed, so all of them go sick yeh. You own your life if your are stressed it’s your stress address it and sort it out. Instead of looking for other people to cover your slack while you expect free money. "
ever thought of becoming a spokesperson for MH? I’m sure you’re man up type attitude would be most welcome  |
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"… in the porn industry? Ha, does anyone ever pull a sickie in the porn industry lol?
“Oh no, that hot bird I’m shooting a scene with tomorrow is really dull. I can’t do it man! Fuck it, I’ll say I’ve got bird flu!”
I’d imagine if they where due to do a a shoot with Ron Jeremy "
Good point! If I was doing a shoot with Ron Jeremy I’d fly out the building, resign or lock myself in a cupboard with the girls to protect them! Grief! What a bloke! Dodgiest sleazeball in history! What did any woman see in him???  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are times a break will be beneficial
There are times a break will delay progress and set you back
Only you can say which is needed now as we don't know you, your disposition or your circumstances |
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OP - in all seriousness, your question is better addressed to your GP or Citizen’s Advice people. Unless you’re very lucky I doubt any of us are suitably qualified to give you a particularly helpful answer. Maybe discuss pay and your situation with your agency too.
Of course, I totally understand you asking the question and I too have been in a similar place before. All I can advise you is to try to stay positive, stay as focussed as you can on your priority of earning and do your best. You never know what chance luck meeting might be around the corner which might just sort out your problems.
What I can say is that not going to work could bring more problems than benefits: your agency might replace you and you’ll earn less money. Moreover, you’ll have more time to think about your problems that could make you even more stressed. Work might have the double benefit of easing your financial woes and distracting you from those problems. Good luck and don’t be shy to ask for professional help and advice. There’s a lot out there if you know where to look. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Stop it..
Suicide is one of the biggest causes of death in younger men, bullshit attitudes such as you are spouting simply belong in a cave..
No one is going to fuck you for acting like a neanderthal..
Just stop it.."
No a weak culture has created a rise in suicide, look at history look at the world we live in now. Everything and everyone wants to blame someone or something for their life being shit for being stressed. You think your pandering helps clearly it doesn’t and statistics show it. But I’ll go back to my cave, and don’t worry I’ll keep contributing to the country and so will the rest of the hard working individuals who carry on despite feeling stress, loss, bad times or adversity. But when your culture finally takes over see how well the world functions see who’s willing to keep working and grafting doing hard manual jobs the jobs that people like yourself take for granted.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I haven't been paid by an agency and ben diddled nearly 800 quid.
I changed agencies, and the New agency has witheld payment of 1st weeks wages.
Is it reasonable grounds to report in sick with stress as im really struggling to make ends meet"
I thought the agency had folded as per your other thread  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Stop it..
Suicide is one of the biggest causes of death in younger men, bullshit attitudes such as you are spouting simply belong in a cave..
No one is going to fuck you for acting like a neanderthal..
Just stop it..
No a weak culture has created a rise in suicide, look at history look at the world we live in now. Everything and everyone wants to blame someone or something for their life being shit for being stressed. You think your pandering helps clearly it doesn’t and statistics show it. But I’ll go back to my cave, and don’t worry I’ll keep contributing to the country and so will the rest of the hard working individuals who carry on despite feeling stress, loss, bad times or adversity. But when your culture finally takes over see how well the world functions see who’s willing to keep working and grafting doing hard manual jobs the jobs that people like yourself take for granted.
"
The irony here is that you actually sound quite unwell.
Astounding. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Stop it..
Suicide is one of the biggest causes of death in younger men, bullshit attitudes such as you are spouting simply belong in a cave..
No one is going to fuck you for acting like a neanderthal..
Just stop it..
No a weak culture has created a rise in suicide, look at history look at the world we live in now. Everything and everyone wants to blame someone or something for their life being shit for being stressed. You think your pandering helps clearly it doesn’t and statistics show it. But I’ll go back to my cave, and don’t worry I’ll keep contributing to the country and so will the rest of the hard working individuals who carry on despite feeling stress, loss, bad times or adversity. But when your culture finally takes over see how well the world functions see who’s willing to keep working and grafting doing hard manual jobs the jobs that people like yourself take for granted.
The irony here is that you actually sound quite unwell.
Astounding. "
Why’s that cause it’s a different outlook to yours. |
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
"
Well u have alot of empathy!! |
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
"
Blimey, hey everyone I've found the only person in the entire world who has got everything sussed. Kindness pal, kindness |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Yes it is reasonable grounds.
As an agency worker would you get paid? Why has your first weeks wages been withheld?"
I don't know with new agency.
Old one folded and out of pocket. I haven't been paid for 3 weeks now and stressed |
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
you haven’t a clue pal i bet you use words like man the fuck up
Oh no not a clue me lad. Probably got more of a clue than most.
But this world has created weak people. Who can’t take responsibility for their own life choices. Always looking for an easy way out or sympathy. Think generations before ours were not stressed think they had a good time no. But they didn’t sit and moan about it. They pulled their socks on and did what was required. It’s fucking pathetic. "
And you're the very reason people don't talk and end up doing something stupid. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Stop it..
Suicide is one of the biggest causes of death in younger men, bullshit attitudes such as you are spouting simply belong in a cave..
No one is going to fuck you for acting like a neanderthal..
Just stop it.."
Agree. It’s an appalling attitude. |
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"Yes it is reasonable grounds.
As an agency worker would you get paid? Why has your first weeks wages been withheld?
I don't know with new agency.
Old one folded and out of pocket. I haven't been paid for 3 weeks now and stressed"
Can you not approach the company you worked for via the agency? They will have paid someone for your time! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Well u have alot of empathy!! "
Yeh I do when I should.
A individual who comes on to a site like this. With a problem like that does not deserve empathy, if you are stressed if you have problems with work regarding finances, you don’t come here cause you want help. You want pity you want people to be saying oh that’s is awful, that’s so wrong. If anything everyone pandering to this is enabling it. The reality is if you had a problem like this you would be on Google finding professional advice you would be reading every bit of information speaking to doctors not on here. The stress is the individuals stress if it’s stress which is unfortunately no fault of their own then it’s shit but they need to solve it. If it’s stress which is caused by their actions decisions and choices then it’s even more on the so sort it. If you are in a job that causes you stress find a new one if you’re stressed cause you have no money find more or spend less. People want easy answers, get out of jail free cards, or someone doing everything for them, Instead of doing the hard work and sorting it themselves |
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"Yes it is reasonable grounds.
As an agency worker would you get paid? Why has your first weeks wages been withheld?
I don't know with new agency.
Old one folded and out of pocket. I haven't been paid for 3 weeks now and stressed
Can you not approach the company you worked for via the agency? They will have paid someone for your time! "
sometimes agencies have to wait 30 days for payment from the company they are supplying labour for |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Stop it..
Suicide is one of the biggest causes of death in younger men, bullshit attitudes such as you are spouting simply belong in a cave..
No one is going to fuck you for acting like a neanderthal..
Just stop it..
Agree. It’s an appalling attitude. "
It’s not an attitude. Let everyone who is stressed stop working, sign them off for a month yeh. Then see what’s being said in here after a couple weeks. |
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Stop it..
Suicide is one of the biggest causes of death in younger men, bullshit attitudes such as you are spouting simply belong in a cave..
No one is going to fuck you for acting like a neanderthal..
Just stop it..
Agree. It’s an appalling attitude.
It’s not an attitude. Let everyone who is stressed stop working, sign them off for a month yeh. Then see what’s being said in here after a couple weeks. "
what will be said ??? |
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Stop it..
Suicide is one of the biggest causes of death in younger men, bullshit attitudes such as you are spouting simply belong in a cave..
No one is going to fuck you for acting like a neanderthal..
Just stop it..
No a weak culture has created a rise in suicide, look at history look at the world we live in now. Everything and everyone wants to blame someone or something for their life being shit for being stressed. You think your pandering helps clearly it doesn’t and statistics show it. But I’ll go back to my cave, and don’t worry I’ll keep contributing to the country and so will the rest of the hard working individuals who carry on despite feeling stress, loss, bad times or adversity. But when your culture finally takes over see how well the world functions see who’s willing to keep working and grafting doing hard manual jobs the jobs that people like yourself take for granted.
"
Your ignorance is worrying, listen one in four of us will suffer at some point in their life from mental health which is ok but at that point in time that person and it could be yourself or a loved one might reach out and the absolute one thing that isn't needed is an attitude based upon a lack of empathy and coldness..
Ps, I don't have a 'culture' my background is military and blue light services for a longer period than you've been on this planet..
Sadly I have seen men who have served in both unable to talk to others and taken what for them was a solution but was devastating for families, friends and colleagues..
I wish you well but won't be responding to you again.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Stop it..
Suicide is one of the biggest causes of death in younger men, bullshit attitudes such as you are spouting simply belong in a cave..
No one is going to fuck you for acting like a neanderthal..
Just stop it..
Agree. It’s an appalling attitude.
It’s not an attitude. Let everyone who is stressed stop working, sign them off for a month yeh. Then see what’s being said in here after a couple weeks. "
has this been suggested? It's one guy who struggling. This may be the breaking point on top of a load of other shit.
The wider discussion may be worth having ... But not on a thread when someone is struggling. Especially as you know nothing about him other than what he's chosen to share. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Stop it..
Suicide is one of the biggest causes of death in younger men, bullshit attitudes such as you are spouting simply belong in a cave..
No one is going to fuck you for acting like a neanderthal..
Just stop it..
Agree. It’s an appalling attitude.
It’s not an attitude. Let everyone who is stressed stop working, sign them off for a month yeh. Then see what’s being said in here after a couple weeks. what will be said ???"
Everyone complaining they can’t do anything. Shops are empty, drains are blocked, electricity black outs. In every aspect
Look at the statistics you take that many people out of work, things won’t function. The country is on its ass, at the moment imagine the state of it.
But don’t worry it’s not the ops fault or a you problem right |
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Stop it..
Suicide is one of the biggest causes of death in younger men, bullshit attitudes such as you are spouting simply belong in a cave..
No one is going to fuck you for acting like a neanderthal..
Just stop it..
Agree. It’s an appalling attitude.
It’s not an attitude. Let everyone who is stressed stop working, sign them off for a month yeh. Then see what’s being said in here after a couple weeks. what will be said ???
Everyone complaining they can’t do anything. Shops are empty, drains are blocked, electricity black outs. In every aspect
Look at the statistics you take that many people out of work, things won’t function. The country is on its ass, at the moment imagine the state of it.
But don’t worry it’s not the ops fault or a you problem right "
what statistics can you post a link so I see for myself or are you making it up ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
"
Very unhelpful and uneducated comment. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would think that wether you are a contracted employee or an agency worker, you should be entitled to Statutory sick pay - usually this is sorted out by your employer, but is paid for by the state |
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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago
Newry Down |
Stress is well understood by many enlightened firms to cause a reduction in productivity, which is why there is a progression to a four day week with no reduction in remuneration.
Traditional and autocratic business do not understand what 'presenteeism' means and how to get the best out of their workforce, their critical resource !
I have worked in some awful places; horrendous.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Stop it..
Suicide is one of the biggest causes of death in younger men, bullshit attitudes such as you are spouting simply belong in a cave..
No one is going to fuck you for acting like a neanderthal..
Just stop it..
No a weak culture has created a rise in suicide, look at history look at the world we live in now. Everything and everyone wants to blame someone or something for their life being shit for being stressed. You think your pandering helps clearly it doesn’t and statistics show it. But I’ll go back to my cave, and don’t worry I’ll keep contributing to the country and so will the rest of the hard working individuals who carry on despite feeling stress, loss, bad times or adversity. But when your culture finally takes over see how well the world functions see who’s willing to keep working and grafting doing hard manual jobs the jobs that people like yourself take for granted.
Your ignorance is worrying, listen one in four of us will suffer at some point in their life from mental health which is ok but at that point in time that person and it could be yourself or a loved one might reach out and the absolute one thing that isn't needed is an attitude based upon a lack of empathy and coldness..
Ps, I don't have a 'culture' my background is military and blue light services for a longer period than you've been on this planet..
Sadly I have seen men who have served in both unable to talk to others and taken what for them was a solution but was devastating for families, friends and colleagues..
I wish you well but won't be responding to you again.. "
My Ignorance I think you mean yours. It’s summin like 35% of the population is suffering with moderately high stress at that current time, yes we all are likely too.They control their life they can change it, you make the decisions. I’m
Not here to discuss my stresses and traumas. As stated in a previous reply you are enabling this stress by pandering.
P.s not sure how your age or how long I been on this earth is relevant. So obviously with your military back ground, you are aware of what stress we did incur and the stress that causes and they still kept going. You have seen first hand service men survive horrendous injuries seen horrible things and still keep going. Leave and become happy functioning members of society living with stress and trauma only they can address.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Stop it..
Suicide is one of the biggest causes of death in younger men, bullshit attitudes such as you are spouting simply belong in a cave..
No one is going to fuck you for acting like a neanderthal..
Just stop it..
Agree. It’s an appalling attitude.
It’s not an attitude. Let everyone who is stressed stop working, sign them off for a month yeh. Then see what’s being said in here after a couple weeks. what will be said ???
Everyone complaining they can’t do anything. Shops are empty, drains are blocked, electricity black outs. In every aspect
Look at the statistics you take that many people out of work, things won’t function. The country is on its ass, at the moment imagine the state of it.
But don’t worry it’s not the ops fault or a you problem right what statistics can you post a link so I see for myself or are you making it up ?"
Statistics are pretty accessible. I imagine you are capable of carrying out your on research. Just don’t research the answers you want to try and prove me wrong. Make sure you research the whole topic |
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Stop it..
Suicide is one of the biggest causes of death in younger men, bullshit attitudes such as you are spouting simply belong in a cave..
No one is going to fuck you for acting like a neanderthal..
Just stop it..
No a weak culture has created a rise in suicide, look at history look at the world we live in now. Everything and everyone wants to blame someone or something for their life being shit for being stressed. You think your pandering helps clearly it doesn’t and statistics show it. But I’ll go back to my cave, and don’t worry I’ll keep contributing to the country and so will the rest of the hard working individuals who carry on despite feeling stress, loss, bad times or adversity. But when your culture finally takes over see how well the world functions see who’s willing to keep working and grafting doing hard manual jobs the jobs that people like yourself take for granted.
Your ignorance is worrying, listen one in four of us will suffer at some point in their life from mental health which is ok but at that point in time that person and it could be yourself or a loved one might reach out and the absolute one thing that isn't needed is an attitude based upon a lack of empathy and coldness..
Ps, I don't have a 'culture' my background is military and blue light services for a longer period than you've been on this planet..
Sadly I have seen men who have served in both unable to talk to others and taken what for them was a solution but was devastating for families, friends and colleagues..
I wish you well but won't be responding to you again..
My Ignorance I think you mean yours. It’s summin like 35% of the population is suffering with moderately high stress at that current time, yes we all are likely too.They control their life they can change it, you make the decisions. I’m
Not here to discuss my stresses and traumas. As stated in a previous reply you are enabling this stress by pandering.
P.s not sure how your age or how long I been on this earth is relevant. So obviously with your military back ground, you are aware of what stress we did incur and the stress that causes and they still kept going. You have seen first hand service men survive horrendous injuries seen horrible things and still keep going. Leave and become happy functioning members of society living with stress and trauma only they can address.
"
Trauma is not something to be buried down. Talking about it is healthy and often we need to take a break from it. Not all of us have served, that is very true, but we all experience life differently and different things affect us in different ways. We understand a whole lot more about how stress affects you than we did years ago and it affects each person differently. Some people are able to shrug it off and carry on. Some it makes them physically sick and lowers down their immune system. Me? When I am stressed I go into a state of severe depression that I am on medication on but try to balance with healthy natural coping mechanisms. Throwing myself into work often makes it a lot worse and I develope extreme heart burn and nausea. Not because I make myself like that, but because my body is trying to tell me that something is not right. |
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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago
Not all that North of North London |
"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
you haven’t a clue pal i bet you use words like man the fuck up
Oh no not a clue me lad. Probably got more of a clue than most.
But this world has created weak people. Who can’t take responsibility for their own life choices. Always looking for an easy way out or sympathy. Think generations before ours were not stressed think they had a good time no. But they didn’t sit and moan about it. They pulled their socks on and did what was required. It’s fucking pathetic. "
It's not fucking pathetic.
Views like this are toxic. There's a reason why there's si much focus on getting men to talk about their mental health and they is because male suicide rates are so high. People that try and shut down that conversation or worse belittle those that try to start the conversation are, to paraphrase an earlier post clueless about mental health |
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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago
Not all that North of North London |
"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Well u have alot of empathy!!
Yeh I do when I should.
A individual who comes on to a site like this. With a problem like that does not deserve empathy, if you are stressed if you have problems with work regarding finances, you don’t come here cause you want help. You want pity you want people to be saying oh that’s is awful, that’s so wrong. If anything everyone pandering to this is enabling it. The reality is if you had a problem like this you would be on Google finding professional advice you would be reading every bit of information speaking to doctors not on here. The stress is the individuals stress if it’s stress which is unfortunately no fault of their own then it’s shit but they need to solve it. If it’s stress which is caused by their actions decisions and choices then it’s even more on the so sort it. If you are in a job that causes you stress find a new one if you’re stressed cause you have no money find more or spend less. People want easy answers, get out of jail free cards, or someone doing everything for them, Instead of doing the hard work and sorting it themselves "
What do you mean 'a Forum like this'? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Stop it..
Suicide is one of the biggest causes of death in younger men, bullshit attitudes such as you are spouting simply belong in a cave..
No one is going to fuck you for acting like a neanderthal..
Just stop it..
No a weak culture has created a rise in suicide, look at history look at the world we live in now. Everything and everyone wants to blame someone or something for their life being shit for being stressed. You think your pandering helps clearly it doesn’t and statistics show it. But I’ll go back to my cave, and don’t worry I’ll keep contributing to the country and so will the rest of the hard working individuals who carry on despite feeling stress, loss, bad times or adversity. But when your culture finally takes over see how well the world functions see who’s willing to keep working and grafting doing hard manual jobs the jobs that people like yourself take for granted.
Your ignorance is worrying, listen one in four of us will suffer at some point in their life from mental health which is ok but at that point in time that person and it could be yourself or a loved one might reach out and the absolute one thing that isn't needed is an attitude based upon a lack of empathy and coldness..
Ps, I don't have a 'culture' my background is military and blue light services for a longer period than you've been on this planet..
Sadly I have seen men who have served in both unable to talk to others and taken what for them was a solution but was devastating for families, friends and colleagues..
I wish you well but won't be responding to you again..
My Ignorance I think you mean yours. It’s summin like 35% of the population is suffering with moderately high stress at that current time, yes we all are likely too.They control their life they can change it, you make the decisions. I’m
Not here to discuss my stresses and traumas. As stated in a previous reply you are enabling this stress by pandering.
P.s not sure how your age or how long I been on this earth is relevant. So obviously with your military back ground, you are aware of what stress we did incur and the stress that causes and they still kept going. You have seen first hand service men survive horrendous injuries seen horrible things and still keep going. Leave and become happy functioning members of society living with stress and trauma only they can address.
Trauma is not something to be buried down. Talking about it is healthy and often we need to take a break from it. Not all of us have served, that is very true, but we all experience life differently and different things affect us in different ways. We understand a whole lot more about how stress affects you than we did years ago and it affects each person differently. Some people are able to shrug it off and carry on. Some it makes them physically sick and lowers down their immune system. Me? When I am stressed I go into a state of severe depression that I am on medication on but try to balance with healthy natural coping mechanisms. Throwing myself into work often makes it a lot worse and I develope extreme heart burn and nausea. Not because I make myself like that, but because my body is trying to tell me that something is not right. "
Yeh you need to address the cause of the stress. I’m not saying saying stress doesn’t have side effects from being stressed, Instead of taking medication address the cause of it. Keep
Saying it you control what you do in your life. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Stop it..
Suicide is one of the biggest causes of death in younger men, bullshit attitudes such as you are spouting simply belong in a cave..
No one is going to fuck you for acting like a neanderthal..
Just stop it..
No a weak culture has created a rise in suicide, look at history look at the world we live in now. Everything and everyone wants to blame someone or something for their life being shit for being stressed. You think your pandering helps clearly it doesn’t and statistics show it. But I’ll go back to my cave, and don’t worry I’ll keep contributing to the country and so will the rest of the hard working individuals who carry on despite feeling stress, loss, bad times or adversity. But when your culture finally takes over see how well the world functions see who’s willing to keep working and grafting doing hard manual jobs the jobs that people like yourself take for granted.
Your ignorance is worrying, listen one in four of us will suffer at some point in their life from mental health which is ok but at that point in time that person and it could be yourself or a loved one might reach out and the absolute one thing that isn't needed is an attitude based upon a lack of empathy and coldness..
Ps, I don't have a 'culture' my background is military and blue light services for a longer period than you've been on this planet..
Sadly I have seen men who have served in both unable to talk to others and taken what for them was a solution but was devastating for families, friends and colleagues..
I wish you well but won't be responding to you again..
My Ignorance I think you mean yours. It’s summin like 35% of the population is suffering with moderately high stress at that current time, yes we all are likely too.They control their life they can change it, you make the decisions. I’m
Not here to discuss my stresses and traumas. As stated in a previous reply you are enabling this stress by pandering.
P.s not sure how your age or how long I been on this earth is relevant. So obviously with your military back ground, you are aware of what stress we did incur and the stress that causes and they still kept going. You have seen first hand service men survive horrendous injuries seen horrible things and still keep going. Leave and become happy functioning members of society living with stress and trauma only they can address.
"
I'd guess they have also seen a lot of strong men crippled by PTSD and cPTSD. Because some men have found a way of moving through trauma let's not think everyone has ...and that those that haven't are weak or just need to be told to plow in through.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I didn't think agencies pay workers if they took sick days? Might be wrong."
I think it very much depends on the agency as my sister has worked for several and some have paid sick pay and some haven't. |
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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago
Not all that North of North London |
"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
Stop it..
Suicide is one of the biggest causes of death in younger men, bullshit attitudes such as you are spouting simply belong in a cave..
No one is going to fuck you for acting like a neanderthal..
Just stop it..
No a weak culture has created a rise in suicide, look at history look at the world we live in now. Everything and everyone wants to blame someone or something for their life being shit for being stressed. You think your pandering helps clearly it doesn’t and statistics show it. But I’ll go back to my cave, and don’t worry I’ll keep contributing to the country and so will the rest of the hard working individuals who carry on despite feeling stress, loss, bad times or adversity. But when your culture finally takes over see how well the world functions see who’s willing to keep working and grafting doing hard manual jobs the jobs that people like yourself take for granted.
Your ignorance is worrying, listen one in four of us will suffer at some point in their life from mental health which is ok but at that point in time that person and it could be yourself or a loved one might reach out and the absolute one thing that isn't needed is an attitude based upon a lack of empathy and coldness..
Ps, I don't have a 'culture' my background is military and blue light services for a longer period than you've been on this planet..
Sadly I have seen men who have served in both unable to talk to others and taken what for them was a solution but was devastating for families, friends and colleagues..
I wish you well but won't be responding to you again..
My Ignorance I think you mean yours. It’s summin like 35% of the population is suffering with moderately high stress at that current time, yes we all are likely too.They control their life they can change it, you make the decisions. I’m
Not here to discuss my stresses and traumas. As stated in a previous reply you are enabling this stress by pandering.
P.s not sure how your age or how long I been on this earth is relevant. So obviously with your military back ground, you are aware of what stress we did incur and the stress that causes and they still kept going. You have seen first hand service men survive horrendous injuries seen horrible things and still keep going. Leave and become happy functioning members of society living with stress and trauma only they can address.
"
Apart from the ones that end up on the streets. Or dead. Or alcoholics.
Yeah they don't leave and become happy functioning members of society |
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"
Trauma is not something to be buried down. Talking about it is healthy and often we need to take a break from it. Not all of us have served, that is very true, but we all experience life differently and different things affect us in different ways. We understand a whole lot more about how stress affects you than we did years ago and it affects each person differently. Some people are able to shrug it off and carry on. Some it makes them physically sick and lowers down their immune system. Me? When I am stressed I go into a state of severe depression that I am on medication on but try to balance with healthy natural coping mechanisms. Throwing myself into work often makes it a lot worse and I develope extreme heart burn and nausea. Not because I make myself like that, but because my body is trying to tell me that something is not right.
Yeh you need to address the cause of the stress. I’m not saying saying stress doesn’t have side effects from being stressed, Instead of taking medication address the cause of it. Keep
Saying it you control what you do in your life. "
A lot of depressions cannot be solved by simply "addressing the root of the problem". Many are caused by chemical imbalances in the brain from you not creating enough dopamine or serotonin. That's what the medication is for. To help with that imbalance. There is a huge difference between clinical depression and feeling a bit down |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
you haven’t a clue pal i bet you use words like man the fuck up
Oh no not a clue me lad. Probably got more of a clue than most.
But this world has created weak people. Who can’t take responsibility for their own life choices. Always looking for an easy way out or sympathy. Think generations before ours were not stressed think they had a good time no. But they didn’t sit and moan about it. They pulled their socks on and did what was required. It’s fucking pathetic.
It's not fucking pathetic.
Views like this are toxic. There's a reason why there's si much focus on getting men to talk about their mental health and they is because male suicide rates are so high. People that try and shut down that conversation or worse belittle those that try to start the conversation are, to paraphrase an earlier post clueless about mental health "
Because of culture. Your argument is based on feelings and nothing else’s. The whole culture is why suicide rate is ridiculously high. If you actually researched this instead of taking a point that we all know. Look at suicide rates back through time look at history then look compare it see the difference. Culture has made people weak. But clearly you haven’t read all of this as thst was early on |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Trauma is not something to be buried down. Talking about it is healthy and often we need to take a break from it. Not all of us have served, that is very true, but we all experience life differently and different things affect us in different ways. We understand a whole lot more about how stress affects you than we did years ago and it affects each person differently. Some people are able to shrug it off and carry on. Some it makes them physically sick and lowers down their immune system. Me? When I am stressed I go into a state of severe depression that I am on medication on but try to balance with healthy natural coping mechanisms. Throwing myself into work often makes it a lot worse and I develope extreme heart burn and nausea. Not because I make myself like that, but because my body is trying to tell me that something is not right.
Yeh you need to address the cause of the stress. I’m not saying saying stress doesn’t have side effects from being stressed, Instead of taking medication address the cause of it. Keep
Saying it you control what you do in your life.
A lot of depressions cannot be solved by simply "addressing the root of the problem". Many are caused by chemical imbalances in the brain from you not creating enough dopamine or serotonin. That's what the medication is for. To help with that imbalance. There is a huge difference between clinical depression and feeling a bit down "
|
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I really don't think it's helpful for people to be arguing over whether somebody should be stressed or not. It's completely unnecessary and unacceptable. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
you haven’t a clue pal i bet you use words like man the fuck up
Oh no not a clue me lad. Probably got more of a clue than most.
But this world has created weak people. Who can’t take responsibility for their own life choices. Always looking for an easy way out or sympathy. Think generations before ours were not stressed think they had a good time no. But they didn’t sit and moan about it. They pulled their socks on and did what was required. It’s fucking pathetic.
It's not fucking pathetic.
Views like this are toxic. There's a reason why there's si much focus on getting men to talk about their mental health and they is because male suicide rates are so high. People that try and shut down that conversation or worse belittle those that try to start the conversation are, to paraphrase an earlier post clueless about mental health
Because of culture. Your argument is based on feelings and nothing else’s. The whole culture is why suicide rate is ridiculously high. If you actually researched this instead of taking a point that we all know. Look at suicide rates back through time look at history then look compare it see the difference. Culture has made people weak. But clearly you haven’t read all of this as thst was early on "
how far back should we be looking ? Are we talking more than 100 years? |
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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago
Not all that North of North London |
"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
you haven’t a clue pal i bet you use words like man the fuck up
Oh no not a clue me lad. Probably got more of a clue than most.
But this world has created weak people. Who can’t take responsibility for their own life choices. Always looking for an easy way out or sympathy. Think generations before ours were not stressed think they had a good time no. But they didn’t sit and moan about it. They pulled their socks on and did what was required. It’s fucking pathetic.
It's not fucking pathetic.
Views like this are toxic. There's a reason why there's si much focus on getting men to talk about their mental health and they is because male suicide rates are so high. People that try and shut down that conversation or worse belittle those that try to start the conversation are, to paraphrase an earlier post clueless about mental health
Because of culture. Your argument is based on feelings and nothing else’s. The whole culture is why suicide rate is ridiculously high. If you actually researched this instead of taking a point that we all know. Look at suicide rates back through time look at history then look compare it see the difference. Culture has made people weak. But clearly you haven’t read all of this as thst was early on "
It's not, and I really cannot stress this enough, it is not "weak" to admit to struggling with mental health.
It is not, and again I really cannot stress thos enough, it is not "weak" to seek help support or just some empathy when struggling with mental health.
And it is not, and I really, really cannot fucking stress this last one enough, it is not "weak" to be suicidal, attempt suicide or end your life because of stress, depression or any other mental health condition.
|
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Fuck me I’d rather someone spoke up about how they’re feeling m/what they’re going through rather than have them bury their feelings for fear of being classed as weak.
Classing stress and depression as a weakness is honestly vile
What a sad perspective to have on the subject |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
Trauma is not something to be buried down. Talking about it is healthy and often we need to take a break from it. Not all of us have served, that is very true, but we all experience life differently and different things affect us in different ways. We understand a whole lot more about how stress affects you than we did years ago and it affects each person differently. Some people are able to shrug it off and carry on. Some it makes them physically sick and lowers down their immune system. Me? When I am stressed I go into a state of severe depression that I am on medication on but try to balance with healthy natural coping mechanisms. Throwing myself into work often makes it a lot worse and I develope extreme heart burn and nausea. Not because I make myself like that, but because my body is trying to tell me that something is not right.
Yeh you need to address the cause of the stress. I’m not saying saying stress doesn’t have side effects from being stressed, Instead of taking medication address the cause of it. Keep
Saying it you control what you do in your life.
A lot of depressions cannot be solved by simply "addressing the root of the problem". Many are caused by chemical imbalances in the brain from you not creating enough dopamine or serotonin. That's what the medication is for. To help with that imbalance. There is a huge difference between clinical depression and feeling a bit down
No go research. Weak people are created due to the culture
Either you're just trolling or you are so hell bent on your opinion being the correct opinion you don't want to listen to people who actually do struggle with these things and find being completely open with their mental health to be a god send and has actually made them more confident within themselves  "
.
So I have to listen to everyone And then I have to change my opinion to everyone else’s ?
Once again we all have mental health we all have summin to deal with if people haven’t it’s likely they will. It’s for you to address and make choices and decision that solve it
|
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"Yes it is reasonable grounds.
As an agency worker would you get paid? Why has your first weeks wages been withheld?
I don't know with new agency.
Old one folded and out of pocket. I haven't been paid for 3 weeks now and stressed
Can you not approach the company you worked for via the agency? They will have paid someone for your time! "
A company is unlikely to pay a subcontractor directly if they have already paid their direct contractual relationship on time. They will no doubt have sympathy for the predicament but the financial arrangements between unrelated people are not their issue or concern.
You might be able to embarrass them into paying you via social media but if they have even a remotely competent finance director then no money will be forthcoming. |
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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago
Not all that North of North London |
"
Trauma is not something to be buried down. Talking about it is healthy and often we need to take a break from it. Not all of us have served, that is very true, but we all experience life differently and different things affect us in different ways. We understand a whole lot more about how stress affects you than we did years ago and it affects each person differently. Some people are able to shrug it off and carry on. Some it makes them physically sick and lowers down their immune system. Me? When I am stressed I go into a state of severe depression that I am on medication on but try to balance with healthy natural coping mechanisms. Throwing myself into work often makes it a lot worse and I develope extreme heart burn and nausea. Not because I make myself like that, but because my body is trying to tell me that something is not right.
Yeh you need to address the cause of the stress. I’m not saying saying stress doesn’t have side effects from being stressed, Instead of taking medication address the cause of it. Keep
Saying it you control what you do in your life.
A lot of depressions cannot be solved by simply "addressing the root of the problem". Many are caused by chemical imbalances in the brain from you not creating enough dopamine or serotonin. That's what the medication is for. To help with that imbalance. There is a huge difference between clinical depression and feeling a bit down
No go research. Weak people are created due to the culture
Either you're just trolling or you are so hell bent on your opinion being the correct opinion you don't want to listen to people who actually do struggle with these things and find being completely open with their mental health to be a god send and has actually made them more confident within themselves .
So I have to listen to everyone And then I have to change my opinion to everyone else’s ?
Once again we all have mental health we all have summin to deal with if people haven’t it’s likely they will. It’s for you to address and make choices and decision that solve it
"
Does the same apply to physical issues? Which of those should we man up abd dismiss? |
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"Standard soft world we live in now. I’m stressed , I’m sad blah blah. Im stressed I have no money I’ll go sick and earn no money I’m sure that will help with your stress.
you haven’t a clue pal i bet you use words like man the fuck up
Oh no not a clue me lad. Probably got more of a clue than most.
But this world has created weak people. Who can’t take responsibility for their own life choices. Always looking for an easy way out or sympathy. Think generations before ours were not stressed think they had a good time no. But they didn’t sit and moan about it. They pulled their socks on and did what was required. It’s fucking pathetic.
It's not fucking pathetic.
Views like this are toxic. There's a reason why there's si much focus on getting men to talk about their mental health and they is because male suicide rates are so high. People that try and shut down that conversation or worse belittle those that try to start the conversation are, to paraphrase an earlier post clueless about mental health
Because of culture. Your argument is based on feelings and nothing else’s. The whole culture is why suicide rate is ridiculously high. If you actually researched this instead of taking a point that we all know. Look at suicide rates back through time look at history then look compare it see the difference. Culture has made people weak. But clearly you haven’t read all of this as thst was early on
It's not, and I really cannot stress this enough, it is not "weak" to admit to struggling with mental health.
It is not, and again I really cannot stress thos enough, it is not "weak" to seek help support or just some empathy when struggling with mental health.
And it is not, and I really, really cannot fucking stress this last one enough, it is not "weak" to be suicidal, attempt suicide or end your life because of stress, depression or any other mental health condition.
"
This so much this! 
Tg x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"And he's gone thank god for that
Tg x
Honestly think he was a troll with the way he was going"
Good.
Honestly, I don't know what the hell it is.
Attention seeking, their own problems or experiences pushing some weird narrative or actual illness.
It's far from normal in the least. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
get guidance by seeking legal counsel, someone has already mentioned GP & Citizens Advise...
if you genuinely feel unwell to work due to stress then you’ve a good enough reason to call in sick leave, and your GP should be able to help...!
also, worthwhile checking your contract T&C’s before deciding to do anything drastic...! |
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Either way, I hope you manage to get everything solved with your situation mate. We all have our tough times and us helping each other through them is the least we can do. The majority of the fab community are MH supporters and will always have a ear to listen. Never feel afraid to reach out |
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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago
Not all that North of North London |
"And he's gone thank god for that
Tg x
I hope he's ok, i strongly disagree with what he was saying but I'm not 100% he was on a wind up..
"
I suspect he's fine now. But there's a timebomb ticking that's for sure |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I didn't think agencies pay workers if they took sick days? Might be wrong.
I think it very much depends on the agency as my sister has worked for several and some have paid sick pay and some haven't. "
To qualify for sick pay you have to be earning above a certain threshold, I don't the figure but easy to find .
Also sick pay is paid by the employer and not by the government. I'm an employer and I don't get a penny from the government. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"And he's gone thank god for that
Tg x
I hope he's ok, i strongly disagree with what he was saying but I'm not 100% he was on a wind up..
"
I agree. I don't think a troll would have unlos'd. More someone who doesn't have the thick skin they think. But feels they should. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"And he's gone thank god for that
Tg x
I hope he's ok, i strongly disagree with what he was saying but I'm not 100% he was on a wind up..
"
Same. I think he has struggled in the past and genuinely believes seeking help or talking about it makes you weak and whilst I believe these things should be called out there are definitely ways of doing it. |
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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago
Not all that North of North London |
Anyway back on track, OP, there are dozens of threads about mental health on here, and I've never seen one go like this.
For all the faults of the forums, the mental health threads are almost always kind, supportive and empathetic. Don't take one person's comments to heart |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP. I don't know agency law/approaches etc. But if you don't get paid, I'd urge you to talk to someone (eg citizen advice) to work out your financial options as you could find yourself in a spiral if you do take time out. |
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"I haven't been paid by an agency and ben diddled nearly 800 quid.
I changed agencies, and the New agency has witheld payment of 1st weeks wages.
Is it reasonable grounds to report in sick with stress as im really struggling to make ends meet"
In answer to the original question
I'd check your contract, it may well be you work a week in hand I know that's how some places work, and stress yes it is a valid reason to take leave from work, make sure to self certification yourself, you can find the right documents on the gov website I think. Going without pay though will it add to your stress levels? I would consider all your options and do what ever you feel is the best thing for you x
Tg x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I haven't been paid by an agency and ben diddled nearly 800 quid.
I changed agencies, and the New agency has witheld payment of 1st weeks wages.
Is it reasonable grounds to report in sick with stress as im really struggling to make ends meet"
It’s perfectly acceptable to take any days off to deal with your own mental health. Wether that’s be stress or otherwise, don’t worry about others opinions as to focus on yourself and feel better should be your main goal take time for yourself.
When working for an agency you’re paid weekly as they say but that is a week in hand so the first weeks work you do say Monday 1st of a month - Friday 5th of a month you won’t get paid the 5th it would be the 12th you receive your first wage and weekly then on. If you were to leave a job on one Friday you would receive your wage from the previous weeks work and the Friday after you left you would receive a wage dependant upon your worked hours. So I wouldn’t say the new agency are withholding your wage.
As for the other agency there should be no reason as to why they should keep your £800 so you should be able to do something about it such as speak to citizens advice and explain your situation they’re the best to deal with situations such as this as they have the means and information to contact and sort things such as pay differences.
I hope this helps, get well soon x
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Of course stress is a good enough reason to walk out of a job, one job in particular I had was a fucking nightmare. No job is worth your health or sanity.
Bare in mind though, circumstances dependent, not all will pay you through the recovery stage. |
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