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Gone against your ...
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
own values or broken your own resolutions?
I am not talking about something trivial like falling off the waggon relating to a diet or something. I am talking about having certain values and beliefs about something and then going completely against those.
What made you do it?
How much did you regret having done so?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always said I'd never get involved in someone else's relationship and then I did.
I used to think of cheating as very black and white, but now I don't. But that doesn't mean I'm not a cunt. I don't regret it though, and I'd do it again if I clicked with the right man. |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"I'll do some thinking but I don't tend to swear to be resolute about anything....... life is so much smoother that way.
"
Tbh that is how I see the world these days.
The older I get the more I struggle with being very binary in my values. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Currently faced with making a choice on something for someone else. And one of the better options goes against something I feel quite strongly about. However the benefit the choice could bring to someone may well outweigh my principle/belief.
T |
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Not recently but I have done in the past.
I grew up in a fairly religious family and area and although it was never strictly imposed on me at any stage I was content to carry it on.
I turned away from it completely at the very beginning of the church scandals because although none of that affected me directly I had already started to change my opinions and beliefs in regard to those who were supposed to be guiding me.
I haven't looked back since.
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Currently faced with making a choice on something for someone else. And one of the better options goes against something I feel quite strongly about. However the benefit the choice could bring to someone may well outweigh my principle/belief.
T"
Ouch that sounds difficult!  |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Not recently but I have done in the past.
I grew up in a fairly religious family and area and although it was never strictly imposed on me at any stage I was content to carry it on.
I turned away from it completely at the very beginning of the church scandals because although none of that affected me directly I had already started to change my opinions and beliefs in regard to those who were supposed to be guiding me.
I haven't looked back since.
"
That (your decision) sounds rather healthy to me! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don’t have many ridged beliefs.
Always happy to change my stance on something I learn more about it."
It's surprising how rare that attitude is although it really shouldn't be!
Some people just get stuck in there views |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I don’t have many ridged beliefs.
Always happy to change my stance on something I learn more about it.
It's surprising how rare that attitude is although it really shouldn't be!
Some people just get stuck in there views "
Views aren’t values though. You can change your views all the time and still have integrity.
But if you believe fundamentally it’s wrong to date cheaters, shoplift or gossip and then do it - you’re gonna feel bad, or you have.no integrity. |
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I was let down by a woman I had been talking to for a long time. I liked/wanted her, she liked the attention from me.
Long story short I promised I would never talk /contact her again but low abd behold I did. Got nothing but attitude from her |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think as I've got older some of my views have mellowed and some have become more cemented... In my 20's life was very b+w... Fortunately I've been exposed to a lot of life +experiences since then |
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"I always said I'd never get involved in someone else's relationship and then I did.
I used to think of cheating as very black and white, but now I don't. But that doesn't mean I'm not a cunt. I don't regret it though, and I'd do it again if I clicked with the right man."
If you are a cunt, so am I, and for the same reasons. I think motive matters, and circumstances, and complexity, and loss, and sorrow...and I also think all those things might simply be post-hoc rationalisations to give one's rampant Id a little superficial moral cover.
As MacNiece wrote, the world is incorrigibly plural, and I relish 'the d*unkenness of things being various'.
The point of a moral compass is that the needle moves, right? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I always said I'd never get involved in someone else's relationship and then I did.
I used to think of cheating as very black and white, but now I don't. But that doesn't mean I'm not a cunt. I don't regret it though, and I'd do it again if I clicked with the right man.
If you are a cunt, so am I, and for the same reasons. I think motive matters, and circumstances, and complexity, and loss, and sorrow...and I also think all those things might simply be post-hoc rationalisations to give one's rampant Id a little superficial moral cover.
As MacNiece wrote, the world is incorrigibly plural, and I relish 'the d*unkenness of things being various'.
The point of a moral compass is that the needle moves, right?"
I like that actually.
But yes, we are cunts.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Going against your values isn't always something to regret. When I first started my career I had the aim to work as hard as I could in my industry to try and get to the highest position possible in order to make the biggest salary I can and to do that, I needed to work long hours to show how dedicated I am. Now I'm about 9 years in, I'm beginning to realize that I don't need to do that. I can work up and have ambitions to a make it to a certain level where money is comfortable and have a better work/life balance as a result. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Being "straight" to the point of homophobic most of my life. Then realising it was something I was brought up to think/believe. Not actually who I was/am
Curiosity "made me do it"."
Ah similar actually. My whole family are very racist, homophobic, sexist and hold the most dreadful views in some ways.
And the worst thing is as a kid, I'd judge people because that is how I was raised and I thought it was normal. I'm lucky that aged 9 or 10 something just clicked and I realised exactly what they were filling my head with and I promised myself I'd never be like them.
I don't speak to most of them now, and the ones I do have a problem with me because I won't sit back and let them say awful shite.
You're a product of your own enviroment sometimes.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think everyone has skeletons of some sort ,some are ok with them ,others aren't , it all depends on a person's thinking, different people look at things differently. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Always been against cheating all my life as it hurted me so much I refuse to give the same to the next one .
But a couple of years ago. Since started first lockdown.
Chatting many ladies on POF . I mean a lot. I heard so much .
I came realise how depressive and painful is for them to be trapped in a house with a man who don’t put a finger on her .
A friend of mine ( pen pal ) for 8 years . We talked for long time .
She met someone last year and I’m very happy .
And more stories .
That changed my principals against the cheating .
And I changed and now I’m open to give to a lady what sadly she can’t get at home .
I know is very wrong to cheat .
But I find even more cruel to trap someone in a cage in domestic slovery .
So yeah . Now I’m more then happy to share my love to the ones who all they wanted was to have a little bit.
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"own values or broken your own resolutions?
I am not talking about something trivial like falling off the waggon relating to a diet or something. I am talking about having certain values and beliefs about something and then going completely against those.
What made you do it?
How much did you regret having done so?
"
Watching a relative die of cancer made me really realise that god does not and never did exist. |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Good to see you back with one of your thoughtful threads, OP
I despise sycophancy and that’s one value I’ll never go against.  "
Thank you! 
I am not overly fond of chameleons, either. Be authentic, say what you think and do so as inoffensively as possible.
On another note, in my view there is nothing wrong with changing your mind on something, anything really. It just means we are living creatures that are capable of adapting to change. Or is that too simplified? |
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