FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > why people don't answer
why people don't answer
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"Because lots of people can't take no for an answer and it often leads to abuse so it's easier to just not respond "
This and if you do reply with a no thanks, you get either a why not, a you don't know what you're missing or a thanks for replying message back  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"we call here for fun sex, we are not here for relationships, it should be simpler, and many women want men to be like brad pitt"
It’s really not that hard?!…
1) Women get pick of the litter
2) Men just need to work hard to be IN the litter
3) The runts just need to make puppy dog eyes at enough people until they’re eventually invited home
4) you’re not guaranteed to sleep on the bed either way |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"we call here for fun sex, we are not here for relationships, it should be simpler, and many women want men to be like brad pitt"
I agree to be fair, OP.
We are all here for fun sex, I quite like the idea of the women I fancy putting out whenever I message them.
I think it should be that simple, I mean what could be easier than that?
Trouble is when I ask if they want fun sex, they always say that sex with me wouldn’t be much fun  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"maybe I'm not English and I'm Italian and maybe because of that,"
Maybe if you were an Italian FIREMAN, that would do the trick. You know how the ladies like a man with a thick hose .. |
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By *al kalMan
over a year ago
london |
"maybe I'm not English and I'm Italian and maybe because of that,"
No. You need to realise no person here is entitled to a reply.
There are far too many guys vs woman on here, so you need to put the effort in and be patient.
The ladies can pick and choose their favourites here. That’s life. They will receive tons of messages daily. I don’t think anyone has the time to go through that much spam.
Your profile really lacks any detail for anyone to bother with. It needs work bro. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"why does everyone not want to answer or answer once and after never and everyone wants fun but doesn't want to meet, why is it so difficult?"
Pop a bit more info on your profile and a couple of public photos.
Your profile photo is quite nice, if you are patient and keep sending nice messages there will be someone wanting to meet you.
You need to develop a thick skin on here and shrug off the no replies.... |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
Because when we get a message we look at the profile before opening it.
If there's nothing of interest/attraction we'll likely delete without even reading, let alone answering.
A message is often no different to junk/spam emails really.
A |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You didn't say please or include a picture of your old chap did you. Rookie mistake, but you can get it right from now on. Btw, over the toilet bowl is a real winner  |
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OP
If we were looking to meet single guys we would want to establish if there's likely to be an attraction and what we want from Fab is compatible.
There's nothing on your profile that would make me reply, unless it was a particularly exceptional first message.
Nita |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"why does everyone not want to answer or answer once and after never and everyone wants fun but doesn't want to meet, why is it so difficult?"
I still want to be treated like a person with feelings... I also have a busy life.
Plus you know i want sex, but not 'any' sex... I want the right sex, with the right person..
If you don't fit the bill, or if your message is not appealing, or your profile name / content /photos put me off... It the person before you made me think 'that's enough internet today'... Or if i just don't see your message.....
... well the stars and moon just won't be aligned  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"why does everyone not want to answer or answer once and after never and everyone wants fun but doesn't want to meet, why is it so difficult?
I still want to be treated like a person with feelings... I also have a busy life.
Plus you know i want sex, but not 'any' sex... I want the right sex, with the right person..
If you don't fit the bill, or if your message is not appealing, or your profile name / content /photos put me off... It the person before you made me think 'that's enough internet today'... Or if i just don't see your message.....
... well the stars and moon just won't be aligned "
Facts  |
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"we call here for fun sex, we are not here for relationships, it should be simpler, and many women want men to be like brad pitt"
Alas, Life is not easy/simple and people by association are not.
Here is a book I recommend:
How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie.
Yes we are all here for sex but we all probably shouldn't be here for sex with everyone who messages us. And for some people it's just easier not to reply.
I have really tight filters so if you fall outside of them you won't be able to message or get a response. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"why does everyone not want to answer or answer once and after never and everyone wants fun but doesn't want to meet, why is it so difficult?"
Just chill and what will be will be. Not everyone is comfortable chatting to strangers, so message what intrigues you and you get no reply don't worry...it isn't worth the angst |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I get winks, I send nice message, they reply back with one word or message goes unread. The best one is, they message you, you reply back and then they block you for no reason...  ...
Funny ol' world..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Plus
If women had sex with every ask in their mailbox we'd literally not have time to go to work, eat, sleep, dress, get our hair done, do the supermarket shop, visit friends, feed the cat, walk the dog, drink wine, drink tea, look after children, go to the toilet ...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Plus
If women had sex with every ask in their mailbox we'd literally not have time to go to work, eat, sleep, dress, get our hair done, do the supermarket shop, visit friends, feed the cat, walk the dog, drink wine, drink tea, look after children, go to the toilet ... "
I knew there was a reason  |
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"we call here for fun sex, we are not here for relationships, it should be simpler, and many women want men to be like brad pitt"
Are we? Not everyone. Some might want to find a swinging relationship, some might just want to chat, some might enjoy posting pics. Everyone can use fab however they wish |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"we call here for fun sex, we are not here for relationships, it should be simpler, and many women want men to be like brad pitt
Are we? Not everyone. Some might want to find a swinging relationship, some might just want to chat, some might enjoy posting pics. Everyone can use fab however they wish "
Or all of the above |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"why does everyone not want to answer or answer once and after never and everyone wants fun but doesn't want to meet, why is it so difficult?"
Just because people want to have sex, doesn’t mean they want sex with everyone and anyone on here. If there’s no connection or attraction to you/your profile then why would they engage further.
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"we call here for fun sex, we are not here for relationships, it should be simpler, and many women want men to be like brad pitt"
I'm beating the trollops off with a shitty stick, guess I must look like Brad Pitt.
Who knew.........
In seriousness, regardless of how good a message is, first thing we do, look at the profile.
If there are no pictures and next to no biog, we'll most likely delete the message unread.
Winston |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ve just met a female. Social drink only . She bought another friend. Which was ok. Said she would message to take it further …. After leaving blocked. Free loading scum . |
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"we call here for fun sex, we are not here for relationships, it should be simpler, and many women want men to be like brad pitt
I'm beating the trollops off with a shitty stick, guess I must look like Brad Pitt.
Winston "
This tickled me haha! X |
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By *im67Man
over a year ago
London |
"why does everyone not want to answer or answer once and after never and everyone wants fun but doesn't want to meet, why is it so difficult?"
I wouldn't take it too hart mate I've been writing to Carol vordaman for years haven't had a letter or a reply back it's just one of those things |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"we call here for fun sex, we are not here for relationships, it should be simpler, and many women want men to be like brad pitt
Are we? Not everyone. Some might want to find a swinging relationship, some might just want to chat, some might enjoy posting pics. Everyone can use fab however they wish "
Exactly this, we are all here for different reasons |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve just met a female. Social drink only . She bought another friend. Which was ok. Said she would message to take it further …. After leaving blocked. Free loading scum . "
Or they just didn't like you in person |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"why does everyone not want to answer or answer once and after never and everyone wants fun but doesn't want to meet, why is it so difficult?"
Because the messages are bloody boring in the first place is why
Hi or how are you messages don't make me want to reply
Be more creative and hook the person in rather than saying the same old thing as everyone else |
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"I’ve just met a female. Social drink only . She bought another friend. Which was ok. Said she would message to take it further …. After leaving blocked. Free loading scum . "
Report them then... But you'll get banned for naming and shaming on your status.
If they looked that bad, why buy them a drink? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Plus
If women had sex with every ask in their mailbox we'd literally not have time to go to work, eat, sleep, dress, get our hair done, do the supermarket shop, visit friends, feed the cat, walk the dog, drink wine, drink tea, look after children, go to the toilet ... "
. Couple good reasons I suppose  |
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By *arvest 84Man
over a year ago
SCAWBY, NEAR , BRIGG. |
when you send someone a message , and they read it,
i wish they would have the manors to reply,
even if it was a , thanks , but no thanks,
i may be of the older generation, but do find allot of people these days have got no manors and dont know how to be polite. after all , we are not here to fall in love, fabs is a swinging site for fun , not face book, so please have the respect to reply to someone who has sent you a message !!!, x |
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" when you send someone a message , and they read it,
i wish they would have the manors to reply,
even if it was a , thanks , but no thanks,
i may be of the older generation, but do find allot of people these days have got no manors and dont know how to be polite. after all , we are not here to fall in love, fabs is a swinging site for fun , not face book, so please have the respect to reply to someone who has sent you a message !!!, x"
Including all the FAFs?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" when you send someone a message , and they read it,
i wish they would have the manors to reply,
even if it was a , thanks , but no thanks,
i may be of the older generation, but do find allot of people these days have got no manors and dont know how to be polite. after all , we are not here to fall in love, fabs is a swinging site for fun , not face book, so please have the respect to reply to someone who has sent you a message !!!, x"
Nope. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The simple fact is that people will answer if they’re interested.
The thread might as well end here. Yes, exactly. Why is this so hard to understand?"
Because some men are entitled pricks with huge egos and non existent sex lives. They have to blame someone. |
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We always write back to the junk mail purveyors.
"Dear Spice Up Ur Life Indian Restaurant,
Thank you ever so much for the shiny new (and allegedly improved) menu that you shoved through our door this afternoon. Whilst we really appreciate the offer of 50% before 7pm on Tuesdays and free poppadoms (when purchased with a main meal), we would like to politely decline.
We hope this isn't too much of a blow to your business model and wish you all the very best of meal-deals for 2 or 4 (but not at peak times).
Kind regards,
Mr and Mrs KC"
Unless everyone replies to every bit of unsolicited junk mail they receive (in any medium), they cannot criticise. |
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"we call here for fun sex, we are not here for relationships, it should be simpler, and many women want men to be like brad pitt"
This is the exact attitude that puts women off!
Just because it’s a swinging site, doesn’t mean you are entitled to anyone! |
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"it costs nothing to be polite,
my thoughts are,
treat others how you want to be treated yourself.
do you want to be treated with respect or not ??????? . x"
What if 'being treated with respect' involves not being flooded with barely-literate messages from entitled men?
Respect works both ways. No one on Fab is entitled to a reply. You aren't writing to your MP about the neighbour's leylandii. |
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"The simple fact is that people will answer if they’re interested.
The thread might as well end here. Yes, exactly. Why is this so hard to understand?
Because some men are entitled pricks with huge egos and non existent sex lives. They have to blame someone."
So what I'm hearimg is that some men aren't, which feels like a positive take. |
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"why does everyone not want to answer or answer once and after never and everyone wants fun but doesn't want to meet, why is it so difficult?
I wouldn't take it too hart mate I've been writing to Carol vordaman for years haven't had a letter or a reply back it's just one of those things "
To be fair, Suzy Dent is better with the letters.
Winston |
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By *im67Man
over a year ago
London |
"I just think it is rude when you make the effort and others CBA "
Maybe some people have replied in the past and received abuse back when they have politely let the person down with a no thanks and decided they can't be dealing with that crap anymore |
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" when you send someone a message , and they read it,
i wish they would have the manors to reply,
even if it was a , thanks , but no thanks,
i may be of the older generation, but do find allot of people these days have got no manors and dont know how to be polite. after all , we are not here to fall in love, fabs is a swinging site for fun , not face book, so please have the respect to reply to someone who has sent you a message !!!, x"
No. I don’t owe anyone anything on here.
There’s times I come on to us the forums, nosey at pictures, and not even look at messages.
Try getting a few hundred messages a day, reply no thanks, then get more replies asking why not/ugly bitch/slag/didn’t like you away/stuck up cow.
Respect would be to accept that no reply is a no!!
Nothing to do with manners or being polite.
When people don’t show either of those to me with vile messages, why should I respond?
I choose how to spend MY TIME on here - not be dictated how to spend it by people who think I owe them something
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I just think it is rude when you make the effort and others CBA
With someone I know is 100% not my type? No I cba. "
This! Especially when they haven’t bothered to read your profile or they ignore the criteria on it which in my experience is 90% of men on here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Whenever I've said I'm not interested it has never been left at that.
No means no. No reply means no. It's pretty simple, nobody here owes you anything. |
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"I just think it is rude when you make the effort and others CBA
With someone I know is 100% not my type? No I cba.
This! Especially when they haven’t bothered to read your profile or they ignore the criteria on it which in my experience is 90% of men on here."
And a lot of couples....
Winston |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Whenever I've said I'm not interested it has never been left at that.
No means no. No reply means no. It's pretty simple, nobody here owes you anything. "
It ain’t much but at least it is honest work |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Whenever I've said I'm not interested it has never been left at that.
No means no. No reply means no. It's pretty simple, nobody here owes you anything.
It ain’t much but at least it is honest work "
Exactly! At least you understand love. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" when you send someone a message , and they read it,
i wish they would have the manors to reply,
even if it was a , thanks , but no thanks,
i may be of the older generation, but do find allot of people these days have got no manors and dont know how to be polite. after all , we are not here to fall in love, fabs is a swinging site for fun , not face book, so please have the respect to reply to someone who has sent you a message !!!, x"
It has absolutely nothing to do with manners or respect, the people you message owe you nothing and if you could see the amount of messages some of these people get you would understand they simply haven't the time to reply to everyone saying "no thanks" And even if they did, 9 times out of 10 they just get a load of abuse for saying no, so there is no wonder they don't reply and I don't blame them either. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Whenever I've said I'm not interested it has never been left at that.
No means no. No reply means no. It's pretty simple, nobody here owes you anything.
It ain’t much but at least it is honest work
Exactly! At least you understand love."
I try to but I am a bit slow |
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By *im67Man
over a year ago
London |
"I just think it is rude when you make the effort and others CBA
With someone I know is 100% not my type? No I cba.
This! Especially when they haven’t bothered to read your profile or they ignore the criteria on it which in my experience is 90% of men on here."
I'm one of the ten percent that does but can believe about 90% don't.
Can't understand why they don't myself they could always message someone that likes to give guys a good pegging and if the bloke not into that and gets lucky in getting a meet he's in for a rude awakening |
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To the chaps who get cross about people not responding:
Most people can't stand cold callers. Stealing my valuable time, selling me something I don't want, pretending intimacy with me, all to please themselves...
Now apply that logic here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I just think it is rude when you make the effort and others CBA
With someone I know is 100% not my type? No I cba.
This! Especially when they haven’t bothered to read your profile or they ignore the criteria on it which in my experience is 90% of men on here.
And a lot of couples....
Winston "
Very true! Even though my profile says I’m not meeting couples when my filters were off they’d still message. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"why does everyone not want to answer or answer once and after never and everyone wants fun but doesn't want to meet, why is it so difficult?"
Because they are not remotely interested? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
And a lot of couples....
Winston "
And a lot of just about everyone really.
Having a solo profile has really opened my eyes, sadly not always in a positive way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"why does everyone not want to answer or answer once and after never and everyone wants fun but doesn't want to meet, why is it so difficult?"
Ladies have their choices from hundreds of profiles, so fingers crossed someone likes you soon.
At my age I'm not exactly in demand, does not matter a single bit I can run for hours, nor the fact I am rather well endowed.
Do I worry if I get no replies even if I match their criteria....nope.
I concentrate on me, my goals in life, have fun going out with lads, grandkids to pamper, a big UK to visit on weekends away.
Sex, if it happens then it's great, if not, it's no big deal |
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We do ot quite simply. We say on profile we're only playing if have a meet ot status up. We get messages daily to meet.
When we put a meet up, we say a day, time and place. Eg, Thurs at 12 at ours. We get 100's of offers for Monday at 3, dogging ect. Or I can make it at 4pm on Thursday instead.
Why not take whats on offer? If they can't be bothered to read the profile, and accept the offer. We can't be bothered to reply. |
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