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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Enjoy a compilation of comments I have gotten on dating apps lately (not on here, but tbf they're shit too)
"I've never tried a BBW, but I want to"
"I like your confidence, you're a big girl and you're rocking that lifestyle"
"Jesus you're fat" (first message after matching)
"I don't actually fancy you but I'm horny, so..."
"This is why Africa is going hungry"
"I have to be honest, you've got such a pretty face but such an ugly body"
"How big are you currently? I don't usually go for big ladies but I suppose your photos could be out of date"
Hate to let that second guy down, but my confidence is slowly getting worn down! When did people get like this? I kind of half expect abuse on here because everyone is more or less anonymous to a degree. But on the apps where you've got your real name and face etc I would have thought that people would realise they're actually talking to a real person? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sorry to hear that OP, when did people get like this?
Well to a degree it’s always been there, but more recently we have a generation centred on “me me me” and the consequences to others are irrelevant.
It’s not just on dating apps, it’s through society. But maybe I’m just an old whinging gammon? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's less to do with the name and face and more to do with the fact they're behind a screen. They can make that comment, put their phone down and go about their day while you're questioning your self worth as a result.
It's shit but it's why I generally view social media as a cesspit where the dregs of society tend to congregate |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You’re so much better than these people. They don’t deserve you. And I know that’s not all that helpful, it’s still true.
Take a break from them, come back when you’re ready. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's easy to say ignore it and move on but truth is we are all human, that shit hurts. I will never understand the need for anyone to go out their way to insult someone or comment especially on their appearance. These kind of people, there's no changing them, they just operate in a cold way.
We all remember the negative things people say over the postives and that's what makes it worse. What I will say is that we all need to take ownership of who we are. I know I'm a good person and I'm fully aware of all my flaws. I also have access to a mirror so anything anyone throws at me, it's not news.
The least we can all do is try to avoid the negative people and focus on the good ones. Yes it's shit and yes they are shit but try not to let our confidence be damaged by these morons. Stand tall and just be you |
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"It's less to do with the name and face and more to do with the fact they're behind a screen. They can make that comment, put their phone down and go about their day while you're questioning your self worth as a result.
It's shit but it's why I generally view social media as a cesspit where the dregs of society tend to congregate"
This is very true  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"
You’re so much better than these people. They don’t deserve you. And I know that’s not all that helpful, it’s still true.
Take a break from them, come back when you’re ready. X"
When I come back they will still be there |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It's easy to say ignore it and move on but truth is we are all human, that shit hurts. I will never understand the need for anyone to go out their way to insult someone or comment especially on their appearance. These kind of people, there's no changing them, they just operate in a cold way.
We all remember the negative things people say over the postives and that's what makes it worse. What I will say is that we all need to take ownership of who we are. I know I'm a good person and I'm fully aware of all my flaws. I also have access to a mirror so anything anyone throws at me, it's not news.
The least we can all do is try to avoid the negative people and focus on the good ones. Yes it's shit and yes they are shit but try not to let our confidence be damaged by these morons. Stand tall and just be you "
I get that. But some of these guys really think they're increasing their chances by saying some of this shit  I swear that makes me feel even worse somehow |
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"Enjoy a compilation of comments I have gotten on dating apps lately (not on here, but tbf they're shit too)
"I've never tried a BBW, but I want to"
"I like your confidence, you're a big girl and you're rocking that lifestyle"
"Jesus you're fat" (first message after matching)
"I don't actually fancy you but I'm horny, so..."
"This is why Africa is going hungry"
"I have to be honest, you've got such a pretty face but such an ugly body"
"How big are you currently? I don't usually go for big ladies but I suppose your photos could be out of date"
Hate to let that second guy down, but my confidence is slowly getting worn down! When did people get like this? I kind of half expect abuse on here because everyone is more or less anonymous to a degree. But on the apps where you've got your real name and face etc I would have thought that people would realise they're actually talking to a real person? "
Are these from men you have matched with? Looking back, were there any red flags on their profiles? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Enjoy a compilation of comments I have gotten on dating apps lately (not on here, but tbf they're shit too)
"I've never tried a BBW, but I want to"
"I like your confidence, you're a big girl and you're rocking that lifestyle"
"Jesus you're fat" (first message after matching)
"I don't actually fancy you but I'm horny, so..."
"This is why Africa is going hungry"
"I have to be honest, you've got such a pretty face but such an ugly body"
"How big are you currently? I don't usually go for big ladies but I suppose your photos could be out of date"
Hate to let that second guy down, but my confidence is slowly getting worn down! When did people get like this? I kind of half expect abuse on here because everyone is more or less anonymous to a degree. But on the apps where you've got your real name and face etc I would have thought that people would realise they're actually talking to a real person?
Are these from men you have matched with? Looking back, were there any red flags on their profiles?"
Yes.
By "red flags" do you mean "if you match me I will talk shit about your appearance"? How do you even look for that? |
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"It's easy to say ignore it and move on but truth is we are all human, that shit hurts. I will never understand the need for anyone to go out their way to insult someone or comment especially on their appearance. These kind of people, there's no changing them, they just operate in a cold way.
We all remember the negative things people say over the postives and that's what makes it worse. What I will say is that we all need to take ownership of who we are. I know I'm a good person and I'm fully aware of all my flaws. I also have access to a mirror so anything anyone throws at me, it's not news.
The least we can all do is try to avoid the negative people and focus on the good ones. Yes it's shit and yes they are shit but try not to let our confidence be damaged by these morons. Stand tall and just be you
I get that. But some of these guys really think they're increasing their chances by saying some of this shit I swear that makes me feel even worse somehow"
Look, in all honesty, youre probably better off just not using the sites/apps. Nothing anyone in here says is going to be of any benefit to you, and a lot of the 'u ok hun' type of comments i can imagine would be irritating. The best thing you could do is delete the apps, go to your local coffee shop tomorrow and start a conversation with the guy sitting next to you. In reality, its what we should all be doing |
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By *shyaWoman
over a year ago
bedford |
"
You’re so much better than these people. They don’t deserve you. And I know that’s not all that helpful, it’s still true.
Take a break from them, come back when you’re ready. X
When I come back they will still be there "
Never let stupid faceless strangers affect your confidence. They are not your family, they do not support you financially, they don't have power over your life - so don't give it to them. We are all allowed a weaker moment, and once regenerated we are strong and beautiful. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It's easy to say ignore it and move on but truth is we are all human, that shit hurts. I will never understand the need for anyone to go out their way to insult someone or comment especially on their appearance. These kind of people, there's no changing them, they just operate in a cold way.
We all remember the negative things people say over the postives and that's what makes it worse. What I will say is that we all need to take ownership of who we are. I know I'm a good person and I'm fully aware of all my flaws. I also have access to a mirror so anything anyone throws at me, it's not news.
The least we can all do is try to avoid the negative people and focus on the good ones. Yes it's shit and yes they are shit but try not to let our confidence be damaged by these morons. Stand tall and just be you
I get that. But some of these guys really think they're increasing their chances by saying some of this shit I swear that makes me feel even worse somehow
Look, in all honesty, youre probably better off just not using the sites/apps. Nothing anyone in here says is going to be of any benefit to you, and a lot of the 'u ok hun' type of comments i can imagine would be irritating. The best thing you could do is delete the apps, go to your local coffee shop tomorrow and start a conversation with the guy sitting next to you. In reality, its what we should all be doing "
No one talks to each other in public. Everyone's on the apps. If I tried talking to someone in a coffee shop they'd probably look at me like I had two heads.
The only strangers I strike up conversation with are older people in supermarket queues and d*unk people on nights out that you add on Insta and never speak to again. |
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"Enjoy a compilation of comments I have gotten on dating apps lately (not on here, but tbf they're shit too)
"I've never tried a BBW, but I want to"
"I like your confidence, you're a big girl and you're rocking that lifestyle"
"Jesus you're fat" (first message after matching)
"I don't actually fancy you but I'm horny, so..."
"This is why Africa is going hungry"
"I have to be honest, you've got such a pretty face but such an ugly body"
"How big are you currently? I don't usually go for big ladies but I suppose your photos could be out of date"
Hate to let that second guy down, but my confidence is slowly getting worn down! When did people get like this? I kind of half expect abuse on here because everyone is more or less anonymous to a degree. But on the apps where you've got your real name and face etc I would have thought that people would realise they're actually talking to a real person?
Are these from men you have matched with? Looking back, were there any red flags on their profiles?
Yes.
By "red flags" do you mean "if you match me I will talk shit about your appearance"? How do you even look for that? "
Just wondering what the common denominator in your experiences is e.g. is it the platform you're using because hook-up apps may be more conducive to such crass, superficial statements.
Alternatively, is it the initial selection criteria so if you choose based on photos could you look for shared interests or vice versa?
This is by no means blaming you as the recipient for the unacceptable comments you receive but the identification of a pattern is usually the first step to changing it.
To quote the Roman poet Virgil:
"Happy are they who know the causes of things." |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I don't know why you seem to always get the shittiest end of the stick "
I get good ends sometimes. Lately I have been getting lots of shit ends. And sometimes when things are shit they only get shitter for a while, and those shit things seem even more shit than they really are because everything's so shit to begin with. Hopefully things will pick back up soon  |
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"It's easy to say ignore it and move on but truth is we are all human, that shit hurts. I will never understand the need for anyone to go out their way to insult someone or comment especially on their appearance. These kind of people, there's no changing them, they just operate in a cold way.
We all remember the negative things people say over the postives and that's what makes it worse. What I will say is that we all need to take ownership of who we are. I know I'm a good person and I'm fully aware of all my flaws. I also have access to a mirror so anything anyone throws at me, it's not news.
The least we can all do is try to avoid the negative people and focus on the good ones. Yes it's shit and yes they are shit but try not to let our confidence be damaged by these morons. Stand tall and just be you
I get that. But some of these guys really think they're increasing their chances by saying some of this shit I swear that makes me feel even worse somehow
Look, in all honesty, youre probably better off just not using the sites/apps. Nothing anyone in here says is going to be of any benefit to you, and a lot of the 'u ok hun' type of comments i can imagine would be irritating. The best thing you could do is delete the apps, go to your local coffee shop tomorrow and start a conversation with the guy sitting next to you. In reality, its what we should all be doing
No one talks to each other in public. Everyone's on the apps. If I tried talking to someone in a coffee shop they'd probably look at me like I had two heads.
The only strangers I strike up conversation with are older people in supermarket queues and d*unk people on nights out that you add on Insta and never speak to again. "
No man is going to look at you with 2 heads of you try to talk to him. Believe me, men are starved of contact and companionship right now. He may be surprised initially, but he isnt going to run a mile. Nothing may come of it, but at the very least youll get some genuine human contact out of it. Of that i have no doubt |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Unfortunately not. Ita a rapid descent for humanity all linked to the online world. I know that sounds dramatic but this is only heading one way"
Couldn’t have summed it up better myself. |
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Was it all bad? I hope not
I have friends who have found love on apps after many years of trying but in general most of them hate the experience.
The guys complain that it's a sausage party and the women complain about guys behaviour.
I did my dating pre Internet. It was painful and humiliating but at least it was one person at a time. I can't imagine being insulted (even through ignorance) constantly.
I hope you find what you need |
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By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago
Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria |
"Enjoy a compilation of comments I have gotten on dating apps lately (not on here, but tbf they're shit too)
"I've never tried a BBW, but I want to"
"I like your confidence, you're a big girl and you're rocking that lifestyle"
"Jesus you're fat" (first message after matching)
"I don't actually fancy you but I'm horny, so..."
"This is why Africa is going hungry"
"I have to be honest, you've got such a pretty face but such an ugly body"
"How big are you currently? I don't usually go for big ladies but I suppose your photos could be out of date"
Hate to let that second guy down, but my confidence is slowly getting worn down! When did people get like this? I kind of half expect abuse on here because everyone is more or less anonymous to a degree. But on the apps where you've got your real name and face etc I would have thought that people would realise they're actually talking to a real person? "
I’ve not been on any other apps other than this one but if thats the type of people they attract then I’d advise to step away as that’s what I would do, nobody needs that kind of disgusting behaviour in their life, it sounds like they are keyboard warriors who are only there to upset people. Like others have said try to strike up conversation while out and about, if you have any interests or hobbies follow those and you will find people will talk instead of giving any more time to these kind of morons. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
So sorry you’ve experienced this. I usually just get I ‘love BBWs’ and not really had any abuse unless I turn someone down or call them out on something then it is the usual ‘fat schlag’ comments. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Also, is anyone else trying to figure out what "that lifestyle" means? Do you reckon he means just lying around eating crisps all day?
Sometimes I do that, but like... Who doesn't? Right? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Enjoy a compilation of comments I have gotten on dating apps lately (not on here, but tbf they're shit too)
"I've never tried a BBW, but I want to"
"I like your confidence, you're a big girl and you're rocking that lifestyle"
"Jesus you're fat" (first message after matching)
"I don't actually fancy you but I'm horny, so..."
"This is why Africa is going hungry"
"I have to be honest, you've got such a pretty face but such an ugly body"
"How big are you currently? I don't usually go for big ladies but I suppose your photos could be out of date"
Hate to let that second guy down, but my confidence is slowly getting worn down! When did people get like this? I kind of half expect abuse on here because everyone is more or less anonymous to a degree. But on the apps where you've got your real name and face etc I would have thought that people would realise they're actually talking to a real person? "
I once didn't reply fast enough to a man and he sent the following message.
"You have fat sausage fingers anyway Steph, like a mans fingers Steph , really fat"
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Enjoy a compilation of comments I have gotten on dating apps lately (not on here, but tbf they're shit too)
"I've never tried a BBW, but I want to"
"I like your confidence, you're a big girl and you're rocking that lifestyle"
"Jesus you're fat" (first message after matching)
"I don't actually fancy you but I'm horny, so..."
"This is why Africa is going hungry"
"I have to be honest, you've got such a pretty face but such an ugly body"
"How big are you currently? I don't usually go for big ladies but I suppose your photos could be out of date"
Hate to let that second guy down, but my confidence is slowly getting worn down! When did people get like this? I kind of half expect abuse on here because everyone is more or less anonymous to a degree. But on the apps where you've got your real name and face etc I would have thought that people would realise they're actually talking to a real person?
I once didn't reply fast enough to a man and he sent the following message.
"You have fat sausage fingers anyway Steph, like a mans fingers Steph , really fat"
"
Should have told him his mum couldn't get enough of them the other night  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I think its all over the place, face to face too. I am big and I absolutely hate it, including how my body looks which is why I wont do dating apps again. I dont know why people think they have the right to send nasty messages about how you look. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
The thing is I used to use dating apps back in the day when they were first popular, and they were never like this. I actually got a lot of dates and some hookups out of them.
It's like the longer they've gone on the more bitter and hateful people have become |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's an easy to say don't listen to those voices but think about it logically. They are of no importance to you so why "value" their opinions. Trust the opinions of those who do know and like/love you. |
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By *lex46TV/TS
over a year ago
Near Wells |
I can't believe people actually say those things, I doubt whether they would in real life.
It's shameful to be a male when you get idiots like that. I feel for you but I don't have any answers, sorry. |
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By *ty31Man
over a year ago
NW London |
Sucks that idiots feel the need to make moronic remarks like that. I'm sure there are some sad losers that get some stupid kick out of wasting everybody's time making the most idiotic comment possible then complain and whine when the only action they get is with their hand |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I've nothing to add, other than ....
Gawd people can be really shitty.
Their actions are a reflection upon them, your actions a reflection upon you.
Their actions prove they're vile on the inside |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Dating apps make me cringe.
Some of the people on them make me cringe
Fab is better.
Count all the other idiots as a lucky escape
"
LMAO fab is not better
The forums are what make it worthwhile. But fab is not better. |
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That’s just incredibly rude and nasty from them
Sounds like they are annoyed because they don’t get the matches they want so take it out on the ones they do get
Horrible. Report them. The apps can now ban phones completely, get them banned. Then they need a new phone to use them. |
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There should be a ban button where any rude first messages are reviewed and the sender gets instantly banned from the site ...the threat of such a fate would deter at least some of these lo life's...and make the inboxes of everyone more fragrant  |
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