FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Bullying
Bullying
Jump to: Newest in thread
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes, same company 3 tribunals all won" What type of bullying was it? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes, once. I left the job despite a senior manager offering to 'have a word'. I have offered to support colleagues who I've noticed are experiencing bullying " Do you think they actually did have a word? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Has anyone of you in your Adult life encountered Bullying or have been bullied by either individuals or Managers. Plus what was the outcome?" Have you ? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I was bullied by an older manager. I made a formal complaint to HR and was told 'it's just his way, don't worry he'll be retiring soon'. I lost all respect for the head of HR at that point, but persevered in my role despite the way the manager continually denigrated me - out of stubbornness to prove the c@nt wrong. He did retire about 12 months later and I thrived as soon as he left. " HR, aka Management's condom! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes, once. I left the job despite a senior manager offering to 'have a word'. I have offered to support colleagues who I've noticed are experiencing bullying Do you think they actually did have a word? " Yes. I never went back to work there but had cause to go into the work place and came face to face with the 'lady' responsible. She looked extremely embarrassed and uncomfortable. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I was bullied by an older manager. I made a formal complaint to HR and was told 'it's just his way, don't worry he'll be retiring soon'. I lost all respect for the head of HR at that point, but persevered in my role despite the way the manager continually denigrated me - out of stubbornness to prove the c@nt wrong. He did retire about 12 months later and I thrived as soon as he left. " HR only exist to protect the company. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I work in the building trade and bullying is part of the job unfortunately. Hidden behind the banner of "banter" Hate my choice of career." God I hate the banter excuse. Grown people excusing vile behaviour and laughing about it. Abhorrent | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Has anyone of you in your Adult life encountered Bullying or have been bullied by either individuals or Managers. Plus what was the outcome? Have you ?" Yes many times however I've never left my job because it.I always involved management and sticking out and fight my point. however it was their management that were doing it and can be difficult when it's their mates they have to deal with. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes I left at 15 year job because of it " Why, sort em out and don't let them win. Feel food about reporting it but I understand why you did leave. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I work in the building trade and bullying is part of the job unfortunately. Hidden behind the banner of "banter" Hate my choice of career. God I hate the banter excuse. Grown people excusing vile behaviour and laughing about it. Abhorrent " Yes banter can be borderline and not everyone wants it so people need to know their audience. Unfortunately the gob shites of the world don't have any empathy and try to rule the room | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Verbal abuse/personal putdowns in front of people but I stood my ground and did not let it get to me. All came good in the end." Good for you | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I was bullied by an older manager. I made a formal complaint to HR and was told 'it's just his way, don't worry he'll be retiring soon'. I lost all respect for the head of HR at that point, but persevered in my role despite the way the manager continually denigrated me - out of stubbornness to prove the c@nt wrong. He did retire about 12 months later and I thrived as soon as he left. HR only exist to protect the company. " No matter who or department it is I just feel they are poor at dealing with people. They either don't want the extra work or confrontation or they aren't trained to deal with these problems. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I work in the building trade and bullying is part of the job unfortunately. Hidden behind the banner of "banter" Hate my choice of career. God I hate the banter excuse. Grown people excusing vile behaviour and laughing about it. Abhorrent Yes banter can be borderline and not everyone wants it so people need to know their audience. Unfortunately the gob shites of the world don't have any empathy and try to rule the room" They're bullies plain and simple. They have neither the emotional intelligence nor ordinary common sense to realise that though. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I work in the building trade and bullying is part of the job unfortunately. Hidden behind the banner of "banter" Hate my choice of career." I understand where you are coming from. Its about how much you can take however fuck the bullies off and I enjoy seeing them out in their place. Never ever give in to these people. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I don't know if it was bullying really, but either way it made my work day a misery so I found something else and am now much happier" Please explain to use your story | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I was bullied by an older manager. I made a formal complaint to HR and was told 'it's just his way, don't worry he'll be retiring soon'. I lost all respect for the head of HR at that point, but persevered in my role despite the way the manager continually denigrated me - out of stubbornness to prove the c@nt wrong. He did retire about 12 months later and I thrived as soon as he left. HR only exist to protect the company. No matter who or department it is I just feel they are poor at dealing with people. They either don't want the extra work or confrontation or they aren't trained to deal with these problems. " They're trained to make sure all boxes are ticked so the company is protected from litigation. HR is for the company, a union is for the employees. Human Resources, the name tells you all you need to know, the people are of no more value to them than any other resource or asset. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace." I'm in construction and if you ain't taking the piss out of someone you ain't normal, but I've seen it get to the stage where you could see it was starting to get to one guy and I actually stood up and said enough is enough, he thanked me after because he didn't have the balls too tell them to fuck off himself. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace. I'm in construction and if you ain't taking the piss out of someone you ain't normal, but I've seen it get to the stage where you could see it was starting to get to one guy and I actually stood up and said enough is enough, he thanked me after because he didn't have the balls too tell them to fuck off himself. " What I could never fathom is (with due respect to the building and construction workers here) why do they need to behave in such a way? Is it to prove their insecure "alpha-male" status, or just general neanderthal tendencies? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Middle manager who tried to use his little bit of power over everyone at my work place has just been given overall general management position. It's been less than a week and his new behaviour has caused 7 people to quit so far. Hr is a no go, 1 person dept, his friend, whom he gave the job too...." Similar at my work. His incompetence nearly got the company into major issues on numerous occasions. 8 people left because of him. Serious allegations of bullying and sexism against him. HR did nothing. He left with a golden handshake this year. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace. I'm in construction and if you ain't taking the piss out of someone you ain't normal, but I've seen it get to the stage where you could see it was starting to get to one guy and I actually stood up and said enough is enough, he thanked me after because he didn't have the balls too tell them to fuck off himself. What I could never fathom is (with due respect to the building and construction workers here) why do they need to behave in such a way? Is it to prove their insecure "alpha-male" status, or just general neanderthal tendencies?" Its just nature I guess, look at any males in the animal kingdom and there's a pecking order, same with humans, female lions will all go and hunt together but when another male strays into his territory its a ruck. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace. I'm in construction and if you ain't taking the piss out of someone you ain't normal, but I've seen it get to the stage where you could see it was starting to get to one guy and I actually stood up and said enough is enough, he thanked me after because he didn't have the balls too tell them to fuck off himself. What I could never fathom is (with due respect to the building and construction workers here) why do they need to behave in such a way? Is it to prove their insecure "alpha-male" status, or just general neanderthal tendencies?" It's a combination of both I think and not exclusive to those in the construction industry. I find it all quite toxic | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace. I'm in construction and if you ain't taking the piss out of someone you ain't normal, but I've seen it get to the stage where you could see it was starting to get to one guy and I actually stood up and said enough is enough, he thanked me after because he didn't have the balls too tell them to fuck off himself. What I could never fathom is (with due respect to the building and construction workers here) why do they need to behave in such a way? Is it to prove their insecure "alpha-male" status, or just general neanderthal tendencies? Its just nature I guess, look at any males in the animal kingdom and there's a pecking order, same with humans, female lions will all go and hunt together but when another male strays into his territory its a ruck. " Yeah but humans have the ability to reason and observe the effect of our behaviour on other people. Well, most of us do. The banter crowd don't appear to have evolved that far | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace. I'm in construction and if you ain't taking the piss out of someone you ain't normal, but I've seen it get to the stage where you could see it was starting to get to one guy and I actually stood up and said enough is enough, he thanked me after because he didn't have the balls too tell them to fuck off himself. What I could never fathom is (with due respect to the building and construction workers here) why do they need to behave in such a way? Is it to prove their insecure "alpha-male" status, or just general neanderthal tendencies? Its just nature I guess, look at any males in the animal kingdom and there's a pecking order, same with humans, female lions will all go and hunt together but when another male strays into his territory its a ruck. Yeah but humans have the ability to reason and observe the effect of our behaviour on other people. Well, most of us do. The banter crowd don't appear to have evolved that far" Its a funny industry, it's one where any numpty like me with very little education and no grades or qualifications can just walk into and earn a decent living, but yeah, some dont know where to draw the line or have the ability to recognise when what they're saying can actually hurt and do damage mentally | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace. I'm in construction and if you ain't taking the piss out of someone you ain't normal, but I've seen it get to the stage where you could see it was starting to get to one guy and I actually stood up and said enough is enough, he thanked me after because he didn't have the balls too tell them to fuck off himself. What I could never fathom is (with due respect to the building and construction workers here) why do they need to behave in such a way? Is it to prove their insecure "alpha-male" status, or just general neanderthal tendencies? Its just nature I guess, look at any males in the animal kingdom and there's a pecking order, same with humans, female lions will all go and hunt together but when another male strays into his territory its a ruck. Yeah but humans have the ability to reason and observe the effect of our behaviour on other people. Well, most of us do. The banter crowd don't appear to have evolved that far Its a funny industry, it's one where any numpty like me with very little education and no grades or qualifications can just walk into and earn a decent living, but yeah, some dont know where to draw the line or have the ability to recognise when what they're saying can actually hurt and do damage mentally " I don't think it has anything to do with education or qualifications  | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes, sort of. I worked in a male dominated environment with lots of banter. I was the only female and could hold my own, but this person continually took things too far, comments overstepped the mark and became personal on too many occasions. Eventually I called him out on it and to be fair to him he apologised and it stopped." Good for you! It's not always as easy to do that as it should be, but what you did probably helped others too. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace. I'm in construction and if you ain't taking the piss out of someone you ain't normal, but I've seen it get to the stage where you could see it was starting to get to one guy and I actually stood up and said enough is enough, he thanked me after because he didn't have the balls too tell them to fuck off himself. What I could never fathom is (with due respect to the building and construction workers here) why do they need to behave in such a way? Is it to prove their insecure "alpha-male" status, or just general neanderthal tendencies? Its just nature I guess, look at any males in the animal kingdom and there's a pecking order, same with humans, female lions will all go and hunt together but when another male strays into his territory its a ruck. Yeah but humans have the ability to reason and observe the effect of our behaviour on other people. Well, most of us do. The banter crowd don't appear to have evolved that far Its a funny industry, it's one where any numpty like me with very little education and no grades or qualifications can just walk into and earn a decent living, but yeah, some dont know where to draw the line or have the ability to recognise when what they're saying can actually hurt and do damage mentally I don't think it has anything to do with education or qualifications "Its not all about being academically educated, you could have grades coming out your arse but still be a cunt to everyone lol | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace. I'm in construction and if you ain't taking the piss out of someone you ain't normal, but I've seen it get to the stage where you could see it was starting to get to one guy and I actually stood up and said enough is enough, he thanked me after because he didn't have the balls too tell them to fuck off himself. What I could never fathom is (with due respect to the building and construction workers here) why do they need to behave in such a way? Is it to prove their insecure "alpha-male" status, or just general neanderthal tendencies? Its just nature I guess, look at any males in the animal kingdom and there's a pecking order, same with humans, female lions will all go and hunt together but when another male strays into his territory its a ruck. Yeah but humans have the ability to reason and observe the effect of our behaviour on other people. Well, most of us do. The banter crowd don't appear to have evolved that far Its a funny industry, it's one where any numpty like me with very little education and no grades or qualifications can just walk into and earn a decent living, but yeah, some dont know where to draw the line or have the ability to recognise when what they're saying can actually hurt and do damage mentally I don't think it has anything to do with education or qualifications
Its not all about being academically educated, you could have grades coming out your arse but still be a cunt to everyone lol"Quite! Just be a decent human | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Has anyone of you in your Adult life encountered Bullying or have been bullied by either individuals or Managers. Plus what was the outcome?" Yep not within a work situation, but bullies are everywhere | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Our son was bullied at school. It's extremely difficult to deal with. " It's a bad situation. I'm sorry he went through it. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Our son was bullied at school. It's extremely difficult to deal with. It's a bad situation. I'm sorry he went through it. " Thanks. We dealt with it as well as we could but had to involve police at one point. There was only one teacher who ever dealt with it effectively. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes I left at 15 year job because of it Why, sort em out and don't let them win. Feel food about reporting it but I understand why you did leave." … I applied for early retirement …. 18 months sIck leave whilst still receiving pay … they tried everything they could to stop me getting it including sacking me against company policy (can’t do that if someone is going through the retirement process so I was reinstated) In the end I won, I got early retirement so never have to work again | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Our son was bullied at school. It's extremely difficult to deal with. It's a bad situation. I'm sorry he went through it. Thanks. We dealt with it as well as we could but had to involve police at one point. There was only one teacher who ever dealt with it effectively." It's so hard. If the family of the bully are wankers then it's even harder. There are usually reasons, bad home etc. Unravelling all that to resolve the situation is nigh on impossible. Just the fact you have to do that despite the effect it has on your son as well, horrible | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Our son was bullied at school. It's extremely difficult to deal with. It's a bad situation. I'm sorry he went through it. Thanks. We dealt with it as well as we could but had to involve police at one point. There was only one teacher who ever dealt with it effectively. It's so hard. If the family of the bully are wankers then it's even harder. There are usually reasons, bad home etc. Unravelling all that to resolve the situation is nigh on impossible. Just the fact you have to do that despite the effect it has on your son as well, horrible " It only resolved properly when they left school. Our son became a well rounded adult, the bully did not. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace. I'm in construction and if you ain't taking the piss out of someone you ain't normal, but I've seen it get to the stage where you could see it was starting to get to one guy and I actually stood up and said enough is enough, he thanked me after because he didn't have the balls too tell them to fuck off himself. What I could never fathom is (with due respect to the building and construction workers here) why do they need to behave in such a way? Is it to prove their insecure "alpha-male" status, or just general neanderthal tendencies?" Bully or be bullied is their motto | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Our son was bullied at school. It's extremely difficult to deal with. " In my day (centuries ago , it seems) It was mainly the teachers doing the bullying. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Our son was bullied at school. It's extremely difficult to deal with. In my day (centuries ago , it seems) It was mainly the teachers doing the bullying. " I've found that bullying is an equal opportunities trait. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I was bullied by an older manager. I made a formal complaint to HR and was told 'it's just his way, don't worry he'll be retiring soon'. I lost all respect for the head of HR at that point, but persevered in my role despite the way the manager continually denigrated me - out of stubbornness to prove the c@nt wrong. He did retire about 12 months later and I thrived as soon as he left. " Nice profile & video | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Happened at one job someone tried it on constantly giving me grief until i picked up a scaffold tube and reacted "  | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
 | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Kind of, when I was 18 and started my apprenticeship with another guy. He wes kind of more laddish in his behaviour and banter where it was more about taking the piss out of you and I genuinely thought he was bullying me and as a result, I got quite defensive which he saw as me being uptight. We worked together for 5 years and over the course of that time, I learned to give it back a bit and take the piss out of him and he mellowed out a little. We both matured in that time and we've actually been close friends ever since "This is the nicest response to the thread | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I was bullied at school and the PE teacher used to do it as well, as I was shit at football. He would validate all the grief I got from the bullies and allow it. Left school and became a big tall long haired cunt with piercings n that. The look on the twats face when he walked into the shop I was working in while at college was wicked. " judo chop | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Kind of, when I was 18 and started my apprenticeship with another guy. He wes kind of more laddish in his behaviour and banter where it was more about taking the piss out of you and I genuinely thought he was bullying me and as a result, I got quite defensive which he saw as me being uptight. We worked together for 5 years and over the course of that time, I learned to give it back a bit and take the piss out of him and he mellowed out a little. We both matured in that time and we've actually been close friends ever since
This is the nicest response to the thread"Thank you, I think it's one of the only times I changed my mind about a person after a bad first impression | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I was bullied my entire school life and I was bullied at work for a time in my first job. I can’t stand bullies and I can sniff one out at twenty paces. Never again will I be bullied. "  | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes, a new sister took over a ward I was on, her and the clique (drinking buddies) they formed were awful! Although she did have to be nice to me when she called me into the office (imagine how I felt being called in, thought would be to give me shit again) and I’m sure she hated having to thank me for my documentation. She always complained I wasn’t fast enough, but being so thorough saved the hospital from two potential law suits! They were able to prove they weren’t negligent because of my admission notes, and documentation. Went to work for two weeks on another ward, as they needed experienced staff, never went back when they offered me the chance to stay. I was also the tissue viability link nurse (put forward because of my assessments of wounds and correct pressure relieving equipment), the haematology link nurse (including being trained up to teach and assess giving blood transfusions) ,and I was trained in ecg’s/bloods and inserting venflons. I was also trained up in teaching others to use the new infusion pumps (even asked to consider applying to teach them as my main job). I did all that in my own time, so she then had to get other members of staff to do what I could do. Have to admit, that gave me some degree of satisfaction xx" Brilliant! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
 | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I had an old manager try...I tried just telling him to back off first, but he didn't listen. So I played the long game, recorded everything he did or said, had several "off the record" chats with HR and another manager about it, explaining how upset it was making me. I did also used to wind him up on purpose, but always being careful to stay within the boundaries of my contract and acceptable conduct guidelines ...he was a chauvinistic little c*nt that used to openly say that women shouldn't be in that male dominated environment, so I knew he'd always react and give me more evidence to support my case. I pulled the ace out of my sleeve when I got signed off with "stress", had a 3 month holiday on full pay, and met with HR to inform them that I would continue to put in sick notes until they changed my line of reporting. They couldn't really do anything else because of the documentation I'd provided and previous times I'd raised it with them. He was absolutely fuming when I returned to work, but had to force himself to be nice to me "Good for you well done | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I don't know if it was bullying really, but either way it made my work day a misery so I found something else and am now much happier Please explain to use your story" A manager constantly on my back for stupid things and sending messages to me even on my day off threatening disciplinary action as I've left a coat hanging in the wrong position for example | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace. I'm in construction and if you ain't taking the piss out of someone you ain't normal, but I've seen it get to the stage where you could see it was starting to get to one guy and I actually stood up and said enough is enough, he thanked me after because he didn't have the balls too tell them to fuck off himself. What I could never fathom is (with due respect to the building and construction workers here) why do they need to behave in such a way? Is it to prove their insecure "alpha-male" status, or just general neanderthal tendencies? Bully or be bullied is their motto" Thats a very black or white way of looking at things and not accurate especially not in situations like the construction industry. I (Mr) have worked on building sites and also inside the banking industry, and have seen far more bullying take place inside the office setting, usually of a more vicious nature as well, than by what you class as a rough neck alpha male. Mainly on building sites and such, all the piss taking, swearing at each other etc is just banter, a way of relieving stress between friends during work. Some people do take things to far and that isn't acceptable, but from my pwn experience that isn't the norm and usually dealt with quickly and effectively. Its hard to understand how much the language and names is all part and parcel of the work environment unless you've actually worked in construction or the building industry. From the outside it looks awful, but is different from the inside. In an office you wouldn't go up to your manager and say "oi you old lazy bastard fancy a coffee" but on site its almost a term of endearment. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Has anyone of you in your Adult life encountered Bullying or have been bullied by either individuals or Managers. Plus what was the outcome?" ++++++++++++++TRIGGER WARNING+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ I don't do well being bullied. I let people know upfront. "Don't bully me or I will lose my shit and if I lose my shit, it will be very unpleasant for you." It's not a threat, it's a real warning of what happens when I'm treated badly by people. I have BPD/EUPD with possible autistic traits. My meltdowns are not pretty and the more serious ones require ambulance and police to section me. I once had a terrible meltdown and accidentally smashed something, sliced myself open by grabbing said smashed item and covered the entire communal area in red. Then proceeded to run out in public covered in red and considered legging it from the police but decided not to as I might have exsanguinated myself. Mostly I keep to myself on bad days, express anything that is distressing me in support group and let people know upfront I'm unhappy and that their behaviour is a possible trigger. I don't intend to traumatise people with my meltdowns but it can happen so it's only fair to give a warning. Management usually re-coil in fear when I tell them my mental illness is a disability and they need to not ride my balls so hard like they do with other people. crazy trumps bully every time. lol! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I was bullied in my first year at secondary school by this large lad in the 4th year I hated school I would lock my self in the bathroom to miss the bus my parents spoke to his cousin it stopped after that then years later at that school I saw a young boy been bullied by third year boys I was in my 5th year I looked out for him after that " I was bullied in school until I started to lose my shit...that was the beginning of the end for the bullies. Apparently, I'm absolutely terrifying when I lose my shit probably because I do things completely out of character. One girl who I'm now adult friends with remembers a time that she knocked my pencil case off my desk and sent everything flying. I lost my shit and walked off to the art room and didn't go to any of my classes for the rest of the day. No one knew where I went and I was never one to not go to classes. This happened when we were 16 and the grown up lady apologise when we were 40 for being a bully. It stamped a memory on her that if you treat people badly.....they might do something drastic and out of character....that you don't see coming. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"30 years ago as a young man I had a manager verbally abusing me every day I was losing confidence and dreading getting up for work. Well the day came when I seen him clutching his chest in agony do I help or go out the office? I helped him two months later he came back to work after recovering from his heart attack he thanked me for helping him in his time of crisis. That’s when I just lost it and told him I nearly walked out of the office as he was such a bastard to me over the time I started working in his office. His face was a picture never spoke to me in a bullying manner again. " Classic and duly deserved. I have to let new management know not to mess with me because I have a mental illness disability requiring the reasonable adjustment of them not to bully me. The last 2 quit. lol! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I was bullied in my first year at secondary school by this large lad in the 4th year I hated school I would lock my self in the bathroom to miss the bus my parents spoke to his cousin it stopped after that then years later at that school I saw a young boy been bullied by third year boys I was in my 5th year I looked out for him after that I was bullied in school until I started to lose my shit...that was the beginning of the end for the bullies. Apparently, I'm absolutely terrifying when I lose my shit probably because I do things completely out of character. One girl who I'm now adult friends with remembers a time that she knocked my pencil case off my desk and sent everything flying. I lost my shit and walked off to the art room and didn't go to any of my classes for the rest of the day. No one knew where I went and I was never one to not go to classes. This happened when we were 16 and the grown up lady apologise when we were 40 for being a bully. It stamped a memory on her that if you treat people badly.....they might do something drastic and out of character....that you don't see coming." Thankyou for sharing your stories. It appears I've unlocked a world of difficulties that people are experiencing daily in their lives. Dealing with bullying is difficult. Not everyone sees it your way for many reasons.The truth is that it can badly affect a person's performance and wellbeing. It can trigger anxiety and many other personal issues. I'm glad I opened this thread as it definitely spurs me on to help others. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I had an old manager try...I tried just telling him to back off first, but he didn't listen. So I played the long game, recorded everything he did or said, had several "off the record" chats with HR and another manager about it, explaining how upset it was making me. I did also used to wind him up on purpose, but always being careful to stay within the boundaries of my contract and acceptable conduct guidelines ...he was a chauvinistic little c*nt that used to openly say that women shouldn't be in that male dominated environment, so I knew he'd always react and give me more evidence to support my case. I pulled the ace out of my sleeve when I got signed off with "stress", had a 3 month holiday on full pay, and met with HR to inform them that I would continue to put in sick notes until they changed my line of reporting. They couldn't really do anything else because of the documentation I'd provided and previous times I'd raised it with them. He was absolutely fuming when I returned to work, but had to force himself to be nice to me "Brilliant and very very happy for your out come | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I had a male boss , little skinny prick of a man with ego issues ,, try bully me as he bullied all his sale staff ...they were all younger people so nervous of him .. one meeting he was ranting shouting , then singled me out and screamed in my face spit drooling out and called me a stupid cunt and poked me in the chest , I head butted him much to the delight of my younger sales peers .. when I picked him up and sat him on the chair we had stern words .. I didn't last long that day though and had to resign .. guy was white as a ghost and genuinely thought I was going to snap his spine or something .. tempting indeed .. unfortunately for him he had to take his licks as he had physically assaulted me infront of 9 other people by poking me ...so he never took it further , I just got paid out money to leave .. " Treat people as they treat you eh. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes, nearly every job I've held down I've had some form of bullying from either management or other co workers" Well that sounds like a You problem sometimes may need to look at yourself, | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes, nearly every job I've held down I've had some form of bullying from either management or other co workers Well that sounds like a You problem sometimes may need to look at yourself, " I agree. Work life is like a black smiths, when you are the anvil you bear the blows and when you are the hammer you strike hard.  | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I left a job in a lab because of fabricated complaints and total lies being fed to managers about me. It cemented two things. One, I wasn't going to continue in labs and two, I would seek to avoid all/predominantly-women workplaces because the atmosphere was toxic. I am a woman, btw. " Something similar happened to me. However I went above them and gave management my account of the issue and they said your story is different to what they told me.pretty embarrassing for them. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes, nearly every job I've held down I've had some form of bullying from either management or other co workers" Maybe you are a different personality that others see your vulnerabilitys as a weakness.sad people who do this | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes, nearly every job I've held down I've had some form of bullying from either management or other co workers Maybe you are a different personality that others see your vulnerabilitys as a weakness.sad people who do this " Unfortunately I am very different to other people, I have autism and very much an introvert. I don't like working in teams etc. Luckily now I have a job where I work very isolated about 95% of the time and my current boss is impressed with my work and has no issues | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes I left at 15 year job because of it " What did you do about it? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes, nearly every job I've held down I've had some form of bullying from either management or other co workers Maybe you are a different personality that others see your vulnerabilitys as a weakness.sad people who do this Unfortunately I am very different to other people, I have autism and very much an introvert. I don't like working in teams etc. Luckily now I have a job where I work very isolated about 95% of the time and my current boss is impressed with my work and has no issues " Who has said your introverted? Why not try doing a personality test? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"In the Army when a sergeant found out my Dad was from Northern Ireland. I was an Irish this and that, latrine duty, KP, guard duty at the weekend, plenty of beastings for minor issues. I fucking hated him and I had access to weapons. Eventually he ended up being transferred elsewhere I never found out why or where. But my service became a lot less hectic and horrendous afterwards. " Again management bullying. Responsibility isn't power but these kinda of people and their egos become inflated and think their bullet proof. No pun intended | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Our managers Bully us to a degree everyday! Or my co workers call it bulling I'm not so sure it's quite that myself! More harassing I would say! That said one of the girls was crying today about it so fine line I think x" Bullying how? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes I was changed to another team and she left. " So it affects your working life coz of a bully and you get removed to another team. That's not managing an issue that's moving it along. Managers are poor at managing people's issues and thats part of the job | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Our managers Bully us to a degree everyday! Or my co workers call it bulling I'm not so sure it's quite that myself! More harassing I would say! That said one of the girls was crying today about it so fine line I think x Bullying how?" Was on our yammer I didn't witness it! A young lady returned from maternity leave 4 weeks ago! Apparently a manager shouted down the isle at her that she has not achieved since being back 4 weeks! And u have had a year of! In front of customers and other staff! Weather its exaggeration I don't know the shouting bit! I do know we are constantly told through our shift if we are not achieving! Had it Monday myself! Did OK today another colleague told me she was told 3 times today she not achieving in end she said I know I'm not! U keep telling me so is not helpfull! It is pretty dire there at mo x | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Our managers Bully us to a degree everyday! Or my co workers call it bulling I'm not so sure it's quite that myself! More harassing I would say! That said one of the girls was crying today about it so fine line I think x Bullying how? Was on our yammer I didn't witness it! A young lady returned from maternity leave 4 weeks ago! Apparently a manager shouted down the isle at her that she has not achieved since being back 4 weeks! And u have had a year of! In front of customers and other staff! Weather its exaggeration I don't know the shouting bit! I do know we are constantly told through our shift if we are not achieving! Had it Monday myself! Did OK today another colleague told me she was told 3 times today she not achieving in end she said I know I'm not! U keep telling me so is not helpfull! It is pretty dire there at mo x" Sounds like your being mistreated. Your not dogs. Do you have a union or someone to speak to who can intervene? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Our managers Bully us to a degree everyday! Or my co workers call it bulling I'm not so sure it's quite that myself! More harassing I would say! That said one of the girls was crying today about it so fine line I think x Bullying how? Was on our yammer I didn't witness it! A young lady returned from maternity leave 4 weeks ago! Apparently a manager shouted down the isle at her that she has not achieved since being back 4 weeks! And u have had a year of! In front of customers and other staff! Weather its exaggeration I don't know the shouting bit! I do know we are constantly told through our shift if we are not achieving! Had it Monday myself! Did OK today another colleague told me she was told 3 times today she not achieving in end she said I know I'm not! U keep telling me so is not helpfull! It is pretty dire there at mo x Sounds like your being mistreated. Your not dogs. Do you have a union or someone to speak to who can intervene?" Think it's getting to the point something needs saying we need enough of us to b on same page with it and all say something! And this is not a small company it's a large supermarket x | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Our managers Bully us to a degree everyday! Or my co workers call it bulling I'm not so sure it's quite that myself! More harassing I would say! That said one of the girls was crying today about it so fine line I think x Bullying how? Was on our yammer I didn't witness it! A young lady returned from maternity leave 4 weeks ago! Apparently a manager shouted down the isle at her that she has not achieved since being back 4 weeks! And u have had a year of! In front of customers and other staff! Weather its exaggeration I don't know the shouting bit! I do know we are constantly told through our shift if we are not achieving! Had it Monday myself! Did OK today another colleague told me she was told 3 times today she not achieving in end she said I know I'm not! U keep telling me so is not helpfull! It is pretty dire there at mo x Sounds like your being mistreated. Your not dogs. Do you have a union or someone to speak to who can intervene? Think it's getting to the point something needs saying we need enough of us to b on same page with it and all say something! And this is not a small company it's a large supermarket x" What the manager is doing is putting you and the rest of your colleagues under pressure. The store has targets and if the manager doesn't meet his employers star's then he/she is out. All of you stick together and don't let the manager bully. If the manager gets one of you on their own then that individual needs to have the balls to get everyone in the office to listen to the manager.hence all stick together. I'm thinking there's a union then as its a large supermarket | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Our managers Bully us to a degree everyday! Or my co workers call it bulling I'm not so sure it's quite that myself! More harassing I would say! That said one of the girls was crying today about it so fine line I think x Bullying how? Was on our yammer I didn't witness it! A young lady returned from maternity leave 4 weeks ago! Apparently a manager shouted down the isle at her that she has not achieved since being back 4 weeks! And u have had a year of! In front of customers and other staff! Weather its exaggeration I don't know the shouting bit! I do know we are constantly told through our shift if we are not achieving! Had it Monday myself! Did OK today another colleague told me she was told 3 times today she not achieving in end she said I know I'm not! U keep telling me so is not helpfull! It is pretty dire there at mo x Sounds like your being mistreated. Your not dogs. Do you have a union or someone to speak to who can intervene? Think it's getting to the point something needs saying we need enough of us to b on same page with it and all say something! And this is not a small company it's a large supermarket x What the manager is doing is putting you and the rest of your colleagues under pressure. The store has targets and if the manager doesn't meet his employers star's then he/she is out. All of you stick together and don't let the manager bully. If the manager gets one of you on their own then that individual needs to have the balls to get everyone in the office to listen to the manager.hence all stick together. I'm thinking there's a union then as its a large supermarket " Yes I say to others the managers are getting it in neck from above its a circle and yes b Usdaw we have no union rep anymore there but can go straight through unions I been in and out of Usdaw over years I have 10 months till retirement so wouldn't rejoin at this stage but others should x | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
""Banter" is the worst excuse in the world; even more so to cover up veiled insults and verbal aggression in the workplace." Banter is fun, it greases the wheels of personal interaction. The dividing line between banter and bullying is when someone involved can't answer back, can't give others some banter. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Our managers Bully us to a degree everyday! Or my co workers call it bulling I'm not so sure it's quite that myself! More harassing I would say! That said one of the girls was crying today about it so fine line I think x Bullying how? Was on our yammer I didn't witness it! A young lady returned from maternity leave 4 weeks ago! Apparently a manager shouted down the isle at her that she has not achieved since being back 4 weeks! And u have had a year of! In front of customers and other staff! Weather its exaggeration I don't know the shouting bit! I do know we are constantly told through our shift if we are not achieving! Had it Monday myself! Did OK today another colleague told me she was told 3 times today she not achieving in end she said I know I'm not! U keep telling me so is not helpfull! It is pretty dire there at mo x Sounds like your being mistreated. Your not dogs. Do you have a union or someone to speak to who can intervene? Think it's getting to the point something needs saying we need enough of us to b on same page with it and all say something! And this is not a small company it's a large supermarket x What the manager is doing is putting you and the rest of your colleagues under pressure. The store has targets and if the manager doesn't meet his employers star's then he/she is out. All of you stick together and don't let the manager bully. If the manager gets one of you on their own then that individual needs to have the balls to get everyone in the office to listen to the manager.hence all stick together. I'm thinking there's a union then as its a large supermarket Yes I say to others the managers are getting it in neck from above its a circle and yes b Usdaw we have no union rep anymore there but can go straight through unions I been in and out of Usdaw over years I have 10 months till retirement so wouldn't rejoin at this stage but others should x" Somebody needs to take on the rep responsibility. That way it hives management something to fear if they are being watched. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes, nearly every job I've held down I've had some form of bullying from either management or other co workers Maybe you are a different personality that others see your vulnerabilitys as a weakness.sad people who do this Unfortunately I am very different to other people, I have autism and very much an introvert. I don't like working in teams etc. Luckily now I have a job where I work very isolated about 95% of the time and my current boss is impressed with my work and has no issues " I relate a lot with this, I'm glad you've found a job that recognises your uniqueness and supports you, it makes a huge difference doesn't it? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I had a male boss , little skinny prick of a man with ego issues ,, try bully me as he bullied all his sale staff ...they were all younger people so nervous of him .. one meeting he was ranting shouting , then singled me out and screamed in my face spit drooling out and called me a stupid cunt and poked me in the chest , I head butted him much to the delight of my younger sales peers .. when I picked him up and sat him on the chair we had stern words .. I didn't last long that day though and had to resign .. guy was white as a ghost and genuinely thought I was going to snap his spine or something .. tempting indeed .. unfortunately for him he had to take his licks as he had physically assaulted me infront of 9 other people by poking me ...so he never took it further , I just got paid out money to leave .. Treat people as they treat you eh. " Absolutely it’s called reflection physically assault me as he did . Then I will touch the person back just in a more focussed absolute manner .
Bully types are insects so need crushing anyway , I see it merely as illuminating someone to a flaw in their ways | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Worked with some nightmare brickie foreman's in the past who were relentless bullies. Also witnessed a few bullying foreman's flat out on the scaffold. " Yes my dad has many funny stories from his younger years about things like this. Laying out aggressive bullying site managers / bosses from engineering / construction industry … We saw some construction chaps having a punch up on Thursday in Swindon on a roof There was rather a lot of swearing and crowd watching below | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Worked with some nightmare brickie foreman's in the past who were relentless bullies. Also witnessed a few bullying foreman's flat out on the scaffold. Yes my dad has many funny stories from his younger years about things like this. Laying out aggressive bullying site managers / bosses from engineering / construction industry … We saw some construction chaps having a punch up on Thursday in Swindon on a roof There was rather a lot of swearing and crowd watching below "Must of been them Park North lot. Bit rough round the edges them lot. Actually i've worked with a lot of them on sites over the years...good bunch of lads. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I was bullied out of a job and suffered a breakdown, but I did mange to take the bully down with me. I've witnessed and called out several bullies in my time." Tell us more please | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes my last manager bullied me over a period of years, most of it was low level then I found out I was autistic and he made my life hell. I resigned after 3 months off sick and multiple suicide attempts. Currently in contact with the the CEO of the Local Authority about the treatment I received. ACAS are involved at early conciliation stage. Personal injury lawyers are also on standby. I couldn't care less about the compensation I may get. I just want to see him held accountable and bring a whole heap of grief to his world" Jesus mate, I hope you're doing okay now. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"The finance director openly bullied me in front of other staff. Imagine you are the accounts manager, a new software system that took 18 months to implement is to be rolled out on Monday.I found out on saturday that it had been postponed! When I woke up to take a kitchen knife to my wrists, the time was up. During my time off work, she sent me an official warning because some records were missing. She had suggested taking the records off site for a temp to put onto the new system, then blamed me! I knew that she was heading out of the country, and I also knew that the company owner would open a birthday card addressed to a member of his staff if it hit his postbox. I wrote my resignation letter to her, pointing out her failings, knowing full well that the MD would read it. She was gone within a month. As for seeing bullying, I was the one of two that spoke up when a Polish girl was getting abused. I also set a trap to prove who was bullying someone else, then the manager couldn't ignore it as I had handwritten evidence from the bully. I'm not a grass, if the bullies didn't do anything wrong, they wouldn't be in trouble." Thanks for your story and absolutely correct. I hope everything is OK in your life now. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes my last manager bullied me over a period of years, most of it was low level then I found out I was autistic and he made my life hell. I resigned after 3 months off sick and multiple suicide attempts. Currently in contact with the the CEO of the Local Authority about the treatment I received. ACAS are involved at early conciliation stage. Personal injury lawyers are also on standby. I couldn't care less about the compensation I may get. I just want to see him held accountable and bring a whole heap of grief to his world Jesus mate, I hope you're doing okay now." Thank you
I'm doing okay, started a new job where they really like me. Sadly the trauma of the last 6 months isn't sonething I will easily recover from but I'm aware that I can use the experience to shape a better me. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes my last manager bullied me over a period of years, most of it was low level then I found out I was autistic and he made my life hell. I resigned after 3 months off sick and multiple suicide attempts. Currently in contact with the the CEO of the Local Authority about the treatment I received. ACAS are involved at early conciliation stage. Personal injury lawyers are also on standby. I couldn't care less about the compensation I may get. I just want to see him held accountable and bring a whole heap of grief to his world Jesus mate, I hope you're doing okay now. Thank you
I'm doing okay, started a new job where they really like me. Sadly the trauma of the last 6 months isn't sonething I will easily recover from but I'm aware that I can use the experience to shape a better me."Glad to hear you're in a better place. It may be a long road but I hope you find your way | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I was bullied everyday at school and it was beyond miserable so now in my adult life I have 0 patients or tolerance of it towards me or people around me. I'm also in a management position in my career so have a lot of influence over the tone of my work environment and now have the confidence and wit to shut down bullies as soon as they try and raise their head. " Superb as stats show its managers that do most of the bullying | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes, once. I left the job despite a senior manager offering to 'have a word'. I have offered to support colleagues who I've noticed are experiencing bullying " Was fortunate enough to be given my first role as a senior manager 10yrs ago. After 6 months of noticing wee things here and there. I tried to call out bullying from management in other departments towards their staff. Being of quite strong character I didn't feel bullied. But as nothing was changing. I felt I had no option but to leave. I have regretted that decision ever since. I feel I let the folk I left behind down. Since then I have made a point in "sticking up" for my men at every turn. Hopefully no-one will ever feel uncomfortable or that dread of coming to work under my supervision ever again. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes, once. I left the job despite a senior manager offering to 'have a word'. I have offered to support colleagues who I've noticed are experiencing bullying Was fortunate enough to be given my first role as a senior manager 10yrs ago. After 6 months of noticing wee things here and there. I tried to call out bullying from management in other departments towards their staff. Being of quite strong character I didn't feel bullied. But as nothing was changing. I felt I had no option but to leave. I have regretted that decision ever since. I feel I let the folk I left behind down. Since then I have made a point in "sticking up" for my men at every turn. Hopefully no-one will ever feel uncomfortable or that dread of coming to work under my supervision ever again. " How did you call them out? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes, once. I left the job despite a senior manager offering to 'have a word'. I have offered to support colleagues who I've noticed are experiencing bullying Was fortunate enough to be given my first role as a senior manager 10yrs ago. After 6 months of noticing wee things here and there. I tried to call out bullying from management in other departments towards their staff. Being of quite strong character I didn't feel bullied. But as nothing was changing. I felt I had no option but to leave. I have regretted that decision ever since. I feel I let the folk I left behind down. Since then I have made a point in "sticking up" for my men at every turn. Hopefully no-one will ever feel uncomfortable or that dread of coming to work under my supervision ever again. How did you call them out?" Brought it up in a management meeting that I thought staff were being intimidated to work late to cover miss organisation by managers in other departments. Was completely shut down and alienated from that moment. So I felt. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes my last manager bullied me over a period of years, most of it was low level then I found out I was autistic and he made my life hell. I resigned after 3 months off sick and multiple suicide attempts. Currently in contact with the the CEO of the Local Authority about the treatment I received. ACAS are involved at early conciliation stage. Personal injury lawyers are also on standby. I couldn't care less about the compensation I may get. I just want to see him held accountable and bring a whole heap of grief to his world" Slightly playing 'devil's advocate' and I'm sure I'll get plenty of comments disagreeing with this. It feels a little like 'bullying back' saying that you want to 'bring a whole heap of grief to his world'. Whilst I'm not in any way condoning what that individual may have put you through, I'm not convinced that trying to cause him pain, regardless of any situation that he may be in, is the ideal outcome. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"When mortgage rates were 16.5% people were worried about losing jobs ,one employer l worked for used threats and intimidation, sexual bullying, all sorts ,l was there a week and it was rife ,everyone was scared to do or say anything ,the boss booted me up the backside one morning, send me flying , he was a huge guy so l could only jab him the chest, told him all the others were scared of standing up to him, took him to a tribunal and won ,they had a file on him 2 inch thick .l heard he threw a filing cabinet out the 1st floor window and hit the cleaning lady ,putting her in hospital ,wouldnt happen nowadays." If he was a big guy, was ge a body builder type big guy? If so he could of been on steroids and that would answer a few questions about his aggressive behaviour | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Has anyone of you in your Adult life encountered Bullying or have been bullied by either individuals or Managers. Plus what was the outcome?" Yes, those responsible were ejected from the club -eventually after following protocol | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes my last manager bullied me over a period of years, most of it was low level then I found out I was autistic and he made my life hell. I resigned after 3 months off sick and multiple suicide attempts. Currently in contact with the the CEO of the Local Authority about the treatment I received. ACAS are involved at early conciliation stage. Personal injury lawyers are also on standby. I couldn't care less about the compensation I may get. I just want to see him held accountable and bring a whole heap of grief to his world Slightly playing 'devil's advocate' and I'm sure I'll get plenty of comments disagreeing with this. It feels a little like 'bullying back' saying that you want to 'bring a whole heap of grief to his world'. Whilst I'm not in any way condoning what that individual may have put you through, I'm not convinced that trying to cause him pain, regardless of any situation that he may be in, is the ideal outcome." Why not? They should be made to suffer in exactly the same way (if not worse), to show them exactly the damage caused by their actions. Anyone who can refer to it as "bullying back" rings warning bells that they're more likely trying to defend the perpetrator. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"When mortgage rates were 16.5% people were worried about losing jobs ,one employer l worked for used threats and intimidation, sexual bullying, all sorts ,l was there a week and it was rife ,everyone was scared to do or say anything ,the boss booted me up the backside one morning, send me flying , he was a huge guy so l could only jab him the chest, told him all the others were scared of standing up to him, took him to a tribunal and won ,they had a file on him 2 inch thick .l heard he threw a filing cabinet out the 1st floor window and hit the cleaning lady ,putting her in hospital ,wouldnt happen nowadays. If he was a big guy, was ge a body builder type big guy? If so he could of been on steroids and that would answer a few questions about his aggressive behaviour " He was a boozer ,his reputation went back to the days of the M1 being built, not much work about, he was always having a go at everybody ,the working week started thur cos he knew no one would come back mon ,so he didnt pay em for 2 days . We had to do compulsory overtime ,undeclared hours ,everything ,lm surprised l lasted a week | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Never experienced this. I find it hard to imagine how or why a person who bullies would survive in the type of companies I work at. They obviously have other issues if they are bullying and so wouldn’t last 5 minutes, or everyone else would just leave. How does this happen in the uk ? I’m guessing it’s companies where lots of people people don’t want to be there , aren’t loyal etc so managers are the dregs and misfits that no other companies want ?" All the above is a definitely not.you would be surprised who what where and when Bullying occurs. It comes in many forms and from many different issues.Your age, sex, colour, promotions etc can all get you into an issue of getting bullied and those are just a few issues off the top of my head. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Administrative bullying at work, punishment postings, that kind of thing, yes, in the past. Abuse of authority really, but no-one gives a fuck." Management at all levels thinks they have power over people. It's not power its responsibility but their egos take over and clouds their judgment coz nobody challenges these dick heads, so they carry on regardless | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"To obviate the possibility that anyone would ever think about bullying you, at the very first inkling of disrespectful behaviour kick back as hard as possible, verbally, and record all interactions. Bullies are generally weak at their core; if the culture of the business is for bullying to be an acceptedode of interaction then plan to get out. There is a massive amount of material on google video about mobbing, and on google about bullying. Educate yourself, rehearse with family and friends and develop a reputation for not being a walkover; the bully will quickly realise that you are not worth the hassle; then follow thru to reinforce your no bullshit attitude. This won't work every time, just in the majority of incidences! Fight back! Watch the original Casey Heynes video on YouTube." Never ever give in to a bully. If they want a reaction, then they will get one they can't handle. Then watch after for the after shocks.They come in the form of passive aggressive so be ready for it. However if you have done your home work then bring it up and warn the bully before it happens. The bully will be exploding that they have no other options. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I was training within the NHS, my field is very known for bullying across the country. Unfortunately I fell victim of it, i became very ill mentally and physically because of it. I didn’t have the strength to stand up to it, I was petrified of the repercussions, I walked away and now in a far far better place. " Can you name your field you were training for? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"When mortgage rates were 16.5% people were worried about losing jobs ,one employer l worked for used threats and intimidation, sexual bullying, all sorts ,l was there a week and it was rife ,everyone was scared to do or say anything ,the boss booted me up the backside one morning, send me flying , he was a huge guy so l could only jab him the chest, told him all the others were scared of standing up to him, took him to a tribunal and won ,they had a file on him 2 inch thick .l heard he threw a filing cabinet out the 1st floor window and hit the cleaning lady ,putting her in hospital ,wouldnt happen nowadays." Oh you mean a sociopath.... | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I was training within the NHS, my field is very known for bullying across the country. Unfortunately I fell victim of it, i became very ill mentally and physically because of it. I didn’t have the strength to stand up to it, I was petrified of the repercussions, I walked away and now in a far far better place. Can you name your field you were training for? " Midwifery | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I was training within the NHS, my field is very known for bullying across the country. Unfortunately I fell victim of it, i became very ill mentally and physically because of it. I didn’t have the strength to stand up to it, I was petrified of the repercussions, I walked away and now in a far far better place. Can you name your field you were training for? Midwifery " That did cross my mind straight away for some reason. What kind of Bullying was it? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Bullied verbally, physically and mentally as a child because of the colour of my skin made me different. Turning point came in secondary school because I couldn't stand it anymore. Since then I stand my ground and make it very clear I will not tolerate any form of bullying regardless of who it's coming from. I have also stood up to others being bullied. In a place of work we all have a duty of care including those in charge, bullying IS NOT ACCEPTABLE. " | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Bullied verbally, physically and mentally as a child because of the colour of my skin made me different. Turning point came in secondary school because I couldn't stand it anymore. Since then I stand my ground and make it very clear I will not tolerate any form of bullying regardless of who it's coming from. I have also stood up to others being bullied. In a place of work we all have a duty of care including those in charge, bullying IS NOT ACCEPTABLE. Very very correct and noble of you to stand another person's ground for them " | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I think that a Business and Workplace Law module should be taught in secondary schools in the final year of the curriculum. Hopefully, it should prepare 15-16 year olds to face the outside world of work, how to deal with workplace bullies, disputes, how to avoid being exploited as a 16-year-old in their first job, and resolutions available to the employee in such cases. It's something I could have done with before starting my first job at 16, and being expected to make tea and run errands." A very good idea however the curriculum probably hasn't got room for it.I do agree though that they should give young adults a heads up on these matters. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Bullying is epidemic in all organisations; it has been rife in everyone of the businesses in which I worked, and the problem is getting worse, everywhere. Educate yourself and plan ahead for the first and subsequent encounters; bullies range from the unc#nscious incompetent to the skilled and highly experienced narcissistic psychopathic Machiavellian who has all the Dark Triad traits. Mobbing is the phenomenon of being bullied by a group of bullies, led by a chief manipulator. " Small groups or pairs can gang up on you if you let them. If things like that happen then remove yourself quickly if you can. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I was bullied personally by a former manager who took it upon herself to be demeaning and condescending in front of other members of staff and failed to carry out training or support when needed. She was swiftly reported to more senior managers and it was in process of been dealt with at hr and she quit beginning of covid lockdowns. " HR, Human Resources, or PM, Personnel Management or Department very often are ineffectual at dealing with issues such as being bullied, mobbed, harassed, etc., because the bully is often in a position of power in the organisation or has personal power, such as being charismatic or having useful contacts to call upon: kissing up and kicking down! Very complex subject which I have been studying for many years: Google Lehmann's list of common bullying categories, but a bully with a target in her or his sights can be very creative in their ways of humiliating their target. Forewarned is forearmed! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Yes, I was bullied by one woman same job as me. I put a grevence in and nothing happened she still a bully. I've since left that job and and much happier. " Good for you. Had a similar experience at my last place. Person in question had been working there for 20+ years, works less hours and gets easier work, but he targeted me and claimed I was lazy | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
 | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Bullys put so much effort in upsetting others ,getting their own way ,covering their own backs that it would be easier if they just got on with their job without upsetting fellow workers ,it amazes me ,they get picked by their superiours and so get backed up otherwise it shows bad judgment from the bosses in picking them in the first place. "They get promoted by managers as the managers see them and use them to get the work done. Bullying into submission untill they are reported then managers reply they didn't know anything about it. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Bullies come in all shapes and sizes and are infinitely creative; if one crosses your path at work, get out as rapidly as possible. Their personality disorder is incurable and treatment usually takes them worse. " Do you think bullies are a form of Narcissistic behaviour? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"For a very effective way of dealing with a bully, watch the Casey Heynes video online of a young schoolkid who got fed up of being tormented by a bully, half his size; and the Casey Heynes appearance on the Justin Bieber concert in Oz!" Seen it. Ouch | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
