 |
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I strive to be a disappointment so I succeed in something 
And you have overcome that stutter. Success indeed  "
Just watched the king’s speech, it helped a lot |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Think we (general we) think that not achieving at something means it should be a disappointment.
I don't think that is strictly the way to think about it. If we always play safe knowing we will succeed we will never progress and that in itself is pretty sad. So I guess disappointment is a natural feeling and shouldn't be avoided as such. Though we can put things in place, such as realistic goals to minimise disappointment.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Normally just overthink how it could've gone differently over the next few days before coming to terms that I can't changes what's happened. But it's still there, buried deep, waiting for me to think about it while I'm trying to sleep years later  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I know I expect, or maybe like to think people will have the same general values and standards of behaviour as me...
..I get disappointed when they don't. I could try to not expect (hope for) anything then wouldn't be disappointed...
But...I think hope and expectations or two different things, still both can be disappointing if things don't work out how I'd like.
Learn from it I guess? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Normally just overthink how it could've gone differently over the next few days before coming to terms that I can't changes what's happened. But it's still there, buried deep, waiting for me to think about it while I'm trying to sleep years later "
Well that's cheery  thanks! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Normally just overthink how it could've gone differently over the next few days before coming to terms that I can't changes what's happened. But it's still there, buried deep, waiting for me to think about it while I'm trying to sleep years later
Well that's cheery thanks! "
You're more than welcome. On another note, I'm off to bed |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
You only 'overcome it', when you experience it and can't manage it.
You may be able to avoid it, though this means a different strategy beforehand.
But ultimately we're, in part, talking about human emotions, which are entirely natural and healthy. Sadness, grief and others may be part of this.
How do we experience our less positive emotions healthily? It's going to depend on us, what we can cope with and more. Often trying to escape feelings isn't so great for us. We don't have to be completely overwhelmed by feelings, in order to feel and process what we want to and can.
I trust myself to take on board a bit at a time. As well as to support myself through life and how that is, at the same time. I engage with my friends and people who care for me. I've had my fair share of disappointment  . I've felt shit and unable to really manage. But having others holding my hand, it did let me find some time and space to get to grips on the inside with what was going on. I didn't need a lot of understanding and working things out, from a 'head' perspective. I needed to get a few things slotted in to place. Perhaps a little like a pressure cooker, I needed to let off steam. Many times I felt devastated, like everything was destroyed and I had nothing but pain.
I found my saviour was to slow down, as much as I wanted the hell gone.
Things work out somehow for us emotionally. We need to watch out for depression and anything that's not good for us. Most importantly, I think we have to get anything that will support and uplift us. We have to nurture ourselves back to a stronger position. Reflect on what could nurture your soul. We know that exercise is very good for our physical and mental health and I make time for it when I'm low this way. Yoga is something that really helps me to balance and restore, taking my mind away from anything but the very moment I'm doing yoga. Walking is something that's easy to slot into life, as short or long a journey as you feel right at the time. You don't need to do these alone. Like having supportive people around you is good, that can include for engaging with exercise or doing other things.
Let things flow gently and this probably means slowly. You can share what you want, in whatever way you want but you don't need any pressure from yourself - that's perhaps a golden rule to adopt.
People who know you and you're close to, may have some guidance for you. It's free to listen and some of it may jump out at you as right, as time passes.
Just go easy on yourself. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I do this with other people. It's a behaviour I'm trying to work through and lesson, but it takes time. I suppose because I've surrounded myself with like minded people most of my life. Letting in one's who are differently behaved and have an alternate mindset default to me has been a frustrating experience, but as with any experience I can but grow with it  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
