FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Fab A Single Guy's perspective

Fab A Single Guy's perspective

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

You scratch your head because your profile is bringing no attention your way. So, you ask for advice on the forum etc, take notes then re-work your bio....

With a revitalised sense of optimism and the multitude of 'you will look at it!!' willy photos banished forever, replaced with classier material. A final spelling and punctuation check and that you're personality shines through. You satisfy yourself any advice given has been implemented and the overall profile reads sense without contradictions and translates well. It's ready, women are going to be intrigued by you now and answer and send you messages......

How, hasn't it worked, why are your messages with effort and care, that prove you've read their bio properly and that relate to what they're seeking going unread or ignored? Those same women that insist a man has a proper profile. Who have said how important building a connection and trust through chatting is key for them to pursue further?

I can answer that for you. After over three months of excruciatingly slow and fractured converse, I finally met the lady for a social. Over a drink I politely asked why she'd leave my mail unreplied for days. Her response was, "lol I can't be arsed most of the time and forget to answer people." A total contradiction then to her profile blurb. There was me doing more of my share of building rapport and trying to engage and interest her, while she did very little or cared to!

Remembering that date and her response to my question brings an understanding as to why despite many recent positive starts, I keep getting ghosted. Truth is, a lady can login to fab, bulk delete all the mail she has, and within moments have her pick of any number of blokes again. Obviously, that's assuming she can be arsed too. They're is another reason chat quickly stops, they realise I'm sincere that I won't meet cheats.

I will and have had, more engaging conversations with a random female stranger passed in the street, than on here. All other meets I've had on fab are from being online, in the right place and at the right time, with them winking or mailing me. From there, it progressed smoothly and simply.

Trust me on this. Save yourself all the effort to no avail. Be showered, be ready to move and be online with a status update you're available and looking for fun. If, any women or couples are seeking to play at that moment close by, they will find you and ask. A single man sending messages at any other time, is futile.

As for that profile you typed again to incorporate the advise of others... Scap it! Keep it simple and make it your own and while you're at it, put those cock pics back up too. Do not humour any suspicion a women is wasting your time, block and forget. Be as ruthless and adept at playing the game as them. You might finally get to enjoy some fab fun.

I'm going to be on so many womens' naughty list now! Oh, well you would never of chatted or met me anyway.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

TLDR, but just be yourself on Fab and never jump through unreasonable hoops just to get your dick wet. That’s my mantra anyway

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By *r SproutMan over a year ago

the middle

TLDR. Have you tried clubs or group socials?

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By *ehindHerEyesCouple over a year ago

SomewhereOnlyWeKnow

I must admit I loved reading these and thinking of the defensive responses.

All I can say if that anyone who thinks being a single male on fab is difficult wait until you are the male half of a couple

Marc

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Women have double sandards. They have a rubbish profile with no pics yet insist you send a face pic!. Even if you do they just ignore you or get judgemental over your looks even tho they are no models themselves. Truth is OP a lot of women on here are fantasists who have no intention of meeting anyone. Men get a bad rep but at least we are actually here for NSA not just to waste time and pic collect.

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By *piderBunnyCouple over a year ago

Back of Nowhere and Beyond

"Women have double sandards. They have a rubbish profile with no pics yet insist you send a face pic!. Even if you do they just ignore you or get judgemental over your looks even tho they are no models themselves. Truth is OP a lot of women on here are fantasists who have no intention of meeting anyone. Men get a bad rep but at least we are actually here for NSA not just to waste time and pic collect.

#notallmen

#notallwomen

Just saying.

Posh

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By *ealitybitesMan over a year ago

Belfast

Thanks for the advice.

If I can offer some in return?

Your first mistake was creating a profile/persona from snippets of what others told you would work.

Therefore regardless of whether you've been here 7 weeks or 7 months those women who can be arsed will always skip on passed the generic gents.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

On the plus side you've got plenty of time to write really long complaints about all the women you're not talking to

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Calm down dear

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Calm down dear "

She's a Winner.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Angry much?

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan over a year ago

Aylesbury

Just stop caring buddy, that's what I do

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By *rlandoMan over a year ago

Yorks/Lincs

Has it ever occurred to anyone that most people on here aren t swingers or that Fab ??

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan over a year ago

Aylesbury

"Has it ever occurred to anyone that most people on here aren t swingers or that Fab ??"

It has actually

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By *anilla switchWoman over a year ago

Hampshire

Be yourself and be patient, can you get out to socials at all?

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By *ora the explorerWoman over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

Anyone who asks for profile advice on the forums gets a private note from me. I’d rather people be themselves then what other people advise them to be. Just my opinion on it.

As for time wasters. That’s not gender specific.

Hope that helps

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By *anilla switchWoman over a year ago

Hampshire

"Has it ever occurred to anyone that most people on here aren t swingers or that Fab ??

It has actually"

This is true, technically I’m not a swinger as I don’t have a partner to swing with. But I’m loving the lifestyle and places it takes me.

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By *JstarsoloWoman over a year ago

Wombwell, Barnsley

Shouldn't tar all women or all men with the same brush.

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By *ananaman41Man over a year ago

Dublin

Angry much?"

Doesnt strike me as angry. Just forthright thats all.

If you agreed with him you wouldn't deem him angry

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Stop trying to get a meet.

Once you give up on that and just see what pops up, any meets you do get are a bonus.

Men are ten a penny but I've had meets in the past.

Effort in doesn't always equal reward. Be yourself, try to be what you think people want never works.

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By *ealitybitesMan over a year ago

Belfast

"Has it ever occurred to anyone that most people on here aren t swingers or that Fab ??"

Obviously! That's why the site has been called Fabwhingers for a while now and you didn't notice.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Brilliant write up.

Jump through zero hoops and just be yourself..

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By *ananaman41Man over a year ago

Dublin

"You scratch your head because your profile is bringing no attention your way. So, you ask for advice on the forum etc, take notes then re-work your bio....

I'm going to be on so many womens' naughty list now! Oh, well you would never of chatted or met me anyway.

This is mostly true. Less is more on here when it comes to profile writing and 'effort'.

However i disagree with the not messaging bit. Do message. In fact do message a lot. But dont waste your time putting effort into it and engaging your brain because that will be fruitless. Come up with a good copy and paste message and then blanket bomb. Women wont have a bulls notion that youve sent it to 30 other women if its a good enough copy and paste.

The numbers game that this place is will then turn up some results for you

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just think it's their loss if they haven't met you. Should be thinking do you like them, not do they like me...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

As a single woman who has been on Fab for a few years - why do men not understand that when there is a huge gene pool for a woman to pick from the guys that have a great personality, wicked sense of humour and don’t moan all the time will always get meets.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple over a year ago

North West

Men ghost too

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan over a year ago

Aylesbury

"As a single woman who has been on Fab for a few years - why do men not understand that when there is a huge gene pool for a woman to pick from the guys that have a great personality, wicked sense of humour and don’t moan all the time will always get meets.

It's my personality isnt it? Or lack there of

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By *ananaman41Man over a year ago

Dublin

Dont even need all of that to be honest i find

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By *JstarsoloWoman over a year ago

Wombwell, Barnsley

"However i disagree with the not messaging bit. Do message. In fact do message a lot. But dont waste your time putting effort into it and engaging your brain because that will be fruitless. Come up with a good copy and paste message and then blanket bomb. Women wont have a bulls notion that youve sent it to 30 other women if its a good enough copy and paste.

The numbers game that this place is will then turn up some results for you"

The only trouble with blanket cut and paste messaging is that you can usually tell, especially if they messaged with the exact same message the week before and forgot they had sent it to you!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

#notallmen

#notallwomen

Just saying.

Posh

^ Exactly this

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"TLDR. Have you tried clubs or group socials?"

Seriously this… Get out there especially if you are new or struggling online. If you want to meet people go to clubs and socials where you will find swingers.

It’s not easy and it can take a long time, swinging isn’t an instant thing (especially online). Just be yourself and have patience.

In my honest opinion get some social verifications built up or club visits and that should get the ball rolling… I was going to clubs way before I knew about the online world of swinging.

I think a lot of people should reevaluate their expectations.

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By *imply DeeWoman over a year ago

Wherever

I would be interested to know did you get to have sex with this lady?

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By *ananaman41Man over a year ago

Dublin

The numbers game that this place is will then turn up some results for you

The only trouble with blanket cut and paste messaging is that you can usually tell, especially if they messaged with the exact same message the week before and forgot they had sent it to you!"

Theres bound to be a bit of collateral damage. But if she didnt read the first one you sent a week ago, chances are she wasnt going to meet you anyway so take two wont make any difference.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So much anger and resentment. It just seems a waste of energy.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You scratch your head because your profile is bringing no attention your way. So, you ask for advice on the forum etc, take notes then re-work your bio....

I'm going to be on so many womens' naughty list now! Oh, well you would never of chatted or met me anyway.

This is mostly true. Less is more on here when it comes to profile writing and 'effort'.

The numbers game that this place is will then turn up some results for you"

It's really not a numbers game.

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By *ananaman41Man over a year ago

Dublin

"You scratch your head because your profile is bringing no attention your way. So, you ask for advice on the forum etc, take notes then re-work your bio....

I'm going to be on so many womens' naughty list now! Oh, well you would never of chatted or met me anyway.

This is mostly true. Less is more on here when it comes to profile writing and 'effort'.

The numbers game that this place is will then turn up some results for you

It's really not a numbers game. "

Oh but it is my dear. It most definitely is

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You scratch your head because your profile is bringing no attention your way. So, you ask for advice on the forum etc, take notes then re-work your bio....

I'm going to be on so many womens' naughty list now! Oh, well you would never of chatted or met me anyway.

Where the problem lies creates the problem that causes pain for us all and its probably not "easy" for any demographics that use the site. Ratio! Take a look at the profiles in your locality and see for yourself. Here we can look at any time day or night and it's roughly 80% men, 8% couples, 5-6% tv/ts and 1% females.

Combined with the bombardment of low quality, one line, dick pic messages ladies and the odd couple can get an overwhelming amount of mail. To understand the problem sometimes you have to be realistic and put yourself in someone else's position. We find it difficult to get responses from couples let alone the rare single lady and to be brutally honest would rather not have to see 99% of the contents of what single men think is an appropriate way to break the ice

sometimes no news can be good news

Don't take it personally you don't get any response it's just the factor of the way things are on here nowadays

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By *acey_RedWoman over a year ago

Liverpool

"Has it ever occurred to anyone that most people on here aren t swingers or that Fab ??"

And that those who are swingers are too busy bonking each other in clubs to read their messages

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By *imi_RougeWoman over a year ago

Portsmouth

Yeah... Not all women... I'm definitely not inundated, never have to bulk delete, always read a msg (unless I can see that it's crude), I have plenty of time to keep up with those who I'm chatting to and try to regularly check in if it's going to be a little while until we can organise a social.

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By *eroLondonMan over a year ago

Mayfair

"Women have double standards. They have a rubbish profile with no pics yet insist you send a face pic!. Even if you do they just ignore you or get judgemental over your looks even tho they are no models themselves. Truth is OP a lot of women on here are fantasists who have no intention of meeting anyone. Men get a bad rep but at least we are actually here for NSA not just to waste time and pic collect.

•

Whilst your exasperation is clear and present this isn't entirely true. A few fantasists run amok amongst us and it's not just women. To get the most out of Fab you need time; three months is hardly cutting it. You also need to be 'fab savvy' and intuitive in order to disregard the time-wasters or fantasists or dubious profiles...

Some of the women I met on here had basic and unimaginative profiles because they were either new, overwhelmed by the crass or still unsure in this uncharted territory. And yet beneath their plain-and-simple veneer they turned out to be the most genuine, honest and sincere.

It takes time. Give it time.

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

Just remember a couples profile consists of a bloke ..and a bird ..send messages you're prepared for both of them to read

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By *inky_couple2020Couple over a year ago

North West

"Just remember a couples profile consists of a bloke ..and a bird ..send messages you're prepared for both of them to read

^^^This! Mr KC does not have nice tits or take kindly to being called babe or doll or darlin'

Actually, nor do I

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

"Just remember a couples profile consists of a bloke ..and a bird ..send messages you're prepared for both of them to read

^^^This! Mr KC does not have nice tits or take kindly to being called babe or doll or darlin'

Actually, nor do I

"
nice tits BTW

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just put ‘nosey bastard’ on your profile text it seems to work! Sod all the other blurb

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan over a year ago

Aylesbury

"Has it ever occurred to anyone that most people on here aren t swingers or that Fab ??

And that those who are swingers are too busy bonking each other in clubs to read their messages

This makes a lot of sense to be fair

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By *hrista BellendWoman over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

" All other meets I've had on fab are from being online, in the right place and at the right time, with them winking or mailing me. From there, it progressed smoothly and simply.

Completely agree OP, I much prefer to hunt for what I want than trawl through all what I don't want.

Definitely make your profile your own, show us what you want us to see

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By *a LunaWoman over a year ago

South Wales

Just stop treating getting sex as an Olympic medal event where getting a gold medal (a shag) is the chief objective.

Relax. Enjoy chatting to people. Perve some boobs. Enjoy other aspects of the site, do some socials.

If you get a meet, then great - if not, c’est la vie.

Plenty more women in the big wide world.

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By *eadinthecloudsMan over a year ago

Manchester

I almost wiped away a tear reading this.

You're doing god's work good sir!

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By *inky_couple2020Couple over a year ago

North West

"Just stop treating getting sex as an Olympic medal event where getting a gold medal (a shag) is the chief objective.

Relax. Enjoy chatting to people. Perve some boobs. Enjoy other aspects of the site, do some socials.

If you get a meet, then great - if not, c’est la vie.

Plenty more women in the big wide world."

What does a bronze medal get you?! And I feel sorry for the dude who finished 4th

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Is this the same for gay men as well? It is quite difficult to find people here. Doesn't matter if they're bisexual or gay. I must admit my block box is getting quite full with people just asking for pictures or cyber sex.

To be honest, it would be nice to meet somebody for regular meets or NSA but I guess I'm barking up the wrong tree because this is Basically a bisexual straight site.

If you think this is a futile response, let me know. I can take it. Wink, wink.

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By *a LunaWoman over a year ago

South Wales

"Just stop treating getting sex as an Olympic medal event where getting a gold medal (a shag) is the chief objective.

Relax. Enjoy chatting to people. Perve some boobs. Enjoy other aspects of the site, do some socials.

If you get a meet, then great - if not, c’est la vie.

Plenty more women in the big wide world.

What does a bronze medal get you?! And I feel sorry for the dude who finished 4th

2nd place is a handjob.

3rd place is a hot chocolate and maybe a biscuit.

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By *assing Fancies xCouple over a year ago

Sherwood Forest

"I must admit I loved reading these and thinking of the defensive responses.

All I can say if that anyone who thinks being a single male on fab is difficult wait until you are the male half of a couple

Marc"
agreed

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By *inky_couple2020Couple over a year ago

North West

"I must admit I loved reading these and thinking of the defensive responses.

All I can say if that anyone who thinks being a single male on fab is difficult wait until you are the male half of a couple

Marc agreed

'Scuse me, you've had a facial from me and everything

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My reading of this is: I ticked the _oxes, why am I not swimming in clunge?

A half decent profile and an interesting message doesn't give you anything other than maybe a foot on the door. If that.

Maybe the messages are taulong off because they are block deleting. Maybe they just aren't that into you. Do you have more luck on other sites ?

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By *partharmonyCouple over a year ago

Ruislip

Just because you haven't been the right person at the right time for one of the comparatively few women on here, it doesn't mean that will always be futile for all men all the time.

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By *assing Fancies xCouple over a year ago

Sherwood Forest

"I must admit I loved reading these and thinking of the defensive responses.

All I can say if that anyone who thinks being a single male on fab is difficult wait until you are the male half of a couple

Marc agreed

'Scuse me, you've had a facial from me and everything

"
ah yes this is very true

it just came out of nowhere... went in my eyes and everything... I must be magic because I never even touched you

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By *inky_couple2020Couple over a year ago

North West

"I must admit I loved reading these and thinking of the defensive responses.

All I can say if that anyone who thinks being a single male on fab is difficult wait until you are the male half of a couple

Marc agreed

'Scuse me, you've had a facial from me and everything

ah yes this is very true

it just came out of nowhere... went in my eyes and everything... I must be magic because I never even touched you

I'm a high velocity squirter

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By *igmaMan over a year ago

Yorkshire

"TLDR, but just be yourself on Fab and never jump through unreasonable hoops just to get your dick wet. That’s my mantra anyway

Amen to that!!

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By *ustBoWoman over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

Taking advice from others about your profile is pointless you end up with a generic meh profile that doesn't represent you. Jumping through hoops to chat or get meets is someones choice if they choose to do that.I don't expect anyone to jump through hoops and neither would I jump through hoops to meet anyone .It either is equal effort from both of us or they can look elsewhere.

Women don't get inundated unless they want to be with mail filters help enormously with them it's why I keep mine tight as a ducks ass. But in saying that yes I will delete messages if the profile or message doesn't interest me. I also though have no issue making first contact if I see a profile I like.

It suits me to do fab this way and it seems to have suited those who I have met as well, and for me that's all that matters.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You scratch your head because your profile is bringing no attention your way. So, you ask for advice on the forum etc, take notes then re-work your bio....

I'm going to be on so many womens' naughty list now! Oh, well you would never of chatted or met me anyway.

sometimes no news can be good news

Don't take it personally you don't get any response it's just the factor of the way things are on here nowadays

So how does the NSA scene attract more females to join the site to make the ratios more balanced? The fact that there is way more men on here proves that men are more into the scene than women and i dont know why.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Single guys!!! I know life sometimes can get tough and I know life sometimes can be a drag

But people, we have been given a gift, we have been given a road….

Think positive.

*one for the music nerds.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"You scratch your head because your profile is bringing no attention your way. So, you ask for advice on the forum etc, take notes then re-work your bio....

I'm going to be on so many womens' naughty list now! Oh, well you would never of chatted or met me anyway.

sometimes no news can be good news

Don't take it personally you don't get any response it's just the factor of the way things are on here nowadays

I know, the gross ratio difference is the bane of all. I know women must get some vile grief on here but my venting was really aimed at the women who say one thing and do another. I've never understood having found a man who has made an effort and not been crass etc, why not prioritise him if they're so sick of the rest, as someone worth their time having put that effort in. It's contradictory of their own hopes expressed in their bio.

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By *ora the explorerWoman over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"Taking advice from others about your profile is pointless you end up with a generic meh profile that doesn't represent you. Jumping through hoops to chat or get meets is someones choice if they choose to do that.I don't expect anyone to jump through hoops and neither would I jump through hoops to meet anyone .It either is equal effort from both of us or they can look elsewhere.

It suits me to do fab this way and it seems to have suited those who I have met as well, and for me that's all that matters. "

Agree with all of this

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

They just don’t fancy you mate

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Is this the same for gay men as well? It is quite difficult to find people here. Doesn't matter if they're bisexual or gay. I must admit my block box is getting quite full with people just asking for pictures or cyber sex.

To be honest, it would be nice to meet somebody for regular meets or NSA but I guess I'm barking up the wrong tree because this is Basically a bisexual straight site.

If you think this is a futile response, let me know. I can take it. Wink, wink."

Are we going to get the gay perspective of Fab?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just be yourself, enjoy the forums for the fun and banter and sometimes you get lucky a strike up a conversation with a fellow forum user and the rest is history.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You scratch your head because your profile is bringing no attention your way. So, you ask for advice on the forum etc, take notes then re-work your bio....

I'm going to be on so many womens' naughty list now! Oh, well you would never of chatted or met me anyway.

sometimes no news can be good news

Don't take it personally you don't get any response it's just the factor of the way things are on here nowadays

"
maybe they do prioritise men who make an effort. Just not all men who do.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I would be interested to know did you get to have sex with this lady?"

No there was no sex, only another social. Truth is I realised from seeing her and learning more about her, that I liked her and was truthful I'd be interested in more. She ghosted me after that. Gutted tbh. She told me I was a liar and exaggerating my feelings. I was'nt at all, it was never foreseen, but I realised it and refused to lie/hide it. Women are wierd.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"My reading of this is: I ticked the _oxes, why am I not swimming in clunge?

A half decent profile and an interesting message doesn't give you anything other than maybe a foot on the door. If that.

Maybe the messages are taulong off because they are block deleting. Maybe they just aren't that into you. Do you have more luck on other sites ? "

I'm not on any other sites. Thought about it, tried some but they're cash cows preying on the lonely. Also as full of escorts and women with 5 o'clock shadows as here.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Have you ever thought about making a video introduction and profile description This also provides evidence that you're not fake? It shows what you look like and sounds like. Some people find voices attractive, so showing your voice is positive.

I have recently made one and I've posted it, just waiting for it to go live. It's basic, not too much detail, but it does the job.

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By *oxesMan over a year ago

Southend, Essex

"You scratch your head because your profile is bringing no attention your way. So, you ask for advice on the forum etc, take notes then re-work your bio....

I'm going to be on so many womens' naughty list now! Oh, well you would never of chatted or met me anyway.

Romeo you have only joined 7 weeks ago

Let's have this convo after 1 or 2 years.

However I do agree with most of your perspective even if my experience of joining Fab was atypical to most single men. it's easy to forget that on fab for every one single women there is 74 men. Tinder and bumble have 3:1 (outdated now) and 9:1 ratios respectively, so it is not just fab issue, women have the numbers game. That's if the messages don't scare then off. Men can become either disheartened or leave the site or Likley become more more aggressive and or competitive.

I also find that swinging is networking it who you meet how you meet them and what freindship you can you develop. To which some of these freindship can become usefull like I.e. Darren is a bouncer he needed extra work Michele runs parties Darren works the doors and gets into them for free meanwhile Michelle knows Ian a photographer who is out of work Ian did the photographs for Darren's PT Facebook page Michael modaks for it and I. Returned the gets paid and job applications.

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By *ibson6922Man over a year ago

Maidstone

Im finding it incredibly hard to get anywhere on here as a single male. I know going to clubs may help me get some veri's and i may go to pleasuers tomorrow.

However, if anyone could have a look at my profile and give me some pointers that would be very most welcome.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"You scratch your head because your profile is bringing no attention your way. So, you ask for advice on the forum etc, take notes then re-work your bio....

I'm going to be on so many womens' naughty list now! Oh, well you would never of chatted or met me anyway.

Romeo you have only joined 7 weeks ago

Let's have this convo after 1 or 2 years.

I liked what you explained about the networking aspect. Not thought of it in those terms before. It's a very flexible platform, bend it to you're will.

My assesment wasn't based on 7 weeks witness however. I've been on and off fab for circa 4 years. It's a head eats tail repeat situ.

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By *hirleyMan over a year ago

somewhere

I'd say in no uncertain terms that you should never expect sex off this site lol. If you want a more level playing field try tinder.

I'm not fussed if I don't get messages or attention, I'm just being myself and that's what's important, as others have said; don't jump through hoops just to capture the attention of someone. If they're sincere they'll make an effort back.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Not quite sure what NSA means but it's a combination of the evolution of things or biology as if it where plus if you ever have to experience some of what the female and couples message content is it would be clear that a good proportion is not exactly warm and respectful.

Prehaps a few too many think it's an outlet just to get ones little chap wet or do what they like

Both where single swingers using the site, scene and clubs before we met and kind of know what it's like from M, F and MF aspects.

As someone pointed out you think that is bad trying to be a single male on here until you are the male half of a couple. A lot of our messages from the single guys gets instantly deleted because either she reads it and doesn't appreciate its content or I read it first and think is inappropriate.

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By *etwifeandhim69Couple over a year ago

Darlington

Fab is now about two thirds if not three quarters "single guys:.

Just take a look at the "meet today" page. You may see in a given day 30-ish single women, mage 160 couples (many of whom only want single women or couples) and the the single guys who number in the thousands (though the site will only display the first 300).

There is simply not enough women or couples for the sheer amount of single.guys in here. Ergo, you are playing a numbers game where the odds are massively stacked against you. It won't fall into your lap because every other guy is in the same boat as you and every account that meets single guys can get hammered with messages.

If you want to get meets as a single guy, get off fab, go to social events and go to clubs.

Even then you're not guaranteed anything but at least you are getting seen and networking which only raises your chances.

At this point Fab might as well stand for Full of Agitated Blokes) because these posts are now daily.

It's time to.stop.relying on the digital world and just get out there and interact with people.for real...otherwise you'll just waste your life away behind a screen hoping for something that statistically won't happen.

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By *un to squirtWoman over a year ago

West lothian

Hi all guy fabers ??. Can't speak for every female on here, but for me I'll go through so many msges checking out the guys profile and 99% of them clearly haven't read "my looking for" or they have and still msg with total crap. Example iam looking for a guy that's minimum height 6ft2. I get msges stating iam 5ft4 but hung like king Kong!! Say no more. But guys like that ruin it for the right guy to get the right females attention.

P.S guys profiles without ANY photo even profile photo get deleted.

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By *ananaman41Man over a year ago

Dublin

"Hi all guy fabers ??. Can't speak for every female on here, but for me I'll go through so many msges checking out the guys profile and 99% of them clearly haven't read "my looking for" or they have and still msg with total crap. Example iam looking for a guy that's minimum height 6ft2. I get msges stating iam 5ft4 but hung like king Kong!! Say no more. But guys like that ruin it for the right guy to get the right females attention.

P.S guys profiles without ANY photo even profile photo get deleted. "

Your profile doesnt anything about looking for min height though?

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By *lik and PaulCouple over a year ago

Flagrante

"Fab is now about two thirds if not three quarters "single guys:.

If you want to get meets as a single guy, get off fab, go to social events and go to clubs.

Even then you're not guaranteed anything but at least you are getting seen and networking which only raises your chances.

At this point Fab might as well stand for Full of Agitated Blokes) because these posts are now daily.

I said the same thing yesterday when someone wanted advice on other sites...my advice was to get offline and interact in the real world, meaning face to face rather than interacting via a keyboard. Much more fun in every way.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

They just don’t fancy you mate

Yet, you're bringing yourself to my attention once again since I blocked you earlier.

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By *ananaman41Man over a year ago

Dublin

"Fab is now about two thirds if not three quarters "single guys:.

If you want to get meets as a single guy, get off fab, go to social events and go to clubs.

Even then you're not guaranteed anything but at least you are getting seen and networking which only raises your chances.

At this point Fab might as well stand for Full of Agitated Blokes) because these posts are now daily.

There was another thread the other day about how thats gotten difficult now for a single guy as well though?

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By *ccllWoman over a year ago

Chippenham

"Thanks for the advice.

If I can offer some in return?

Your first mistake was creating a profile/persona from snippets of what others told you would work.

Therefore regardless of whether you've been here 7 weeks or 7 months those women who can be arsed will always skip on passed the generic gents. "

You have got a brilliant profile!

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By *inky_couple2020Couple over a year ago

North West

Why is it always the fault of women, if men don't get what they want (in general)?

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By *lik and PaulCouple over a year ago

Flagrante

"Fab is now about two thirds if not three quarters "single guys:.

If you want to get meets as a single guy, get off fab, go to social events and go to clubs.

Even then you're not guaranteed anything but at least you are getting seen and networking which only raises your chances.

At this point Fab might as well stand for Full of Agitated Blokes) because these posts are now daily.

There was another thread the other day about how thats gotten difficult now for a single guy as well though? "

What do you mean by difficult?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Fab is now about two thirds if not three quarters "single guys:.

If you want to get meets as a single guy, get off fab, go to social events and go to clubs.

Even then you're not guaranteed anything but at least you are getting seen and networking which only raises your chances.

At this point Fab might as well stand for Full of Agitated Blokes) because these posts are now daily.

It's why I added the part about having a (more engaging conversation passing a lady in the street.) You're spot on, I need to purchase a nice suit and get to some clubs.

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By *lik and PaulCouple over a year ago

Flagrante

"Fab is now about two thirds if not three quarters "single guys:.

If you want to get meets as a single guy, get off fab, go to social events and go to clubs.

Even then you're not guaranteed anything but at least you are getting seen and networking which only raises your chances.

At this point Fab might as well stand for Full of Agitated Blokes) because these posts are now daily.

It's why I added the part about having a (more engaging conversation passing a lady in the street.) You're spot on, I need to purchase a nice suit and get to some clubs.

I would agree with you as I'll chat with anyone. As for the suit, we prefer to stay naked

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By *ananaman41Man over a year ago

Dublin

"Fab is now about two thirds if not three quarters "single guys:.

If you want to get meets as a single guy, get off fab, go to social events and go to clubs.

Even then you're not guaranteed anything but at least you are getting seen and networking which only raises your chances.

At this point Fab might as well stand for Full of Agitated Blokes) because these posts are now daily.

There was another thread the other day about how thats gotten difficult now for a single guy as well though?

What do you mean by difficult?"

Well my recollection of the thread was that the consensus was that women arent receptive to men trying to make conversation in social settings these days. So theyre buggered all round

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By *lik and PaulCouple over a year ago

Flagrante

"Fab is now about two thirds if not three quarters "single guys:.

If you want to get meets as a single guy, get off fab, go to social events and go to clubs.

Even then you're not guaranteed anything but at least you are getting seen and networking which only raises your chances.

At this point Fab might as well stand for Full of Agitated Blokes) because these posts are now daily.

There was another thread the other day about how thats gotten difficult now for a single guy as well though?

What do you mean by difficult?

Well my recollection of the thread was that the consensus was that women arent receptive to men trying to make conversation in social settings these days. So theyre buggered all round"

That's a pretty sweeping statement and certainly not true in my experience.

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By *etwifeandhim69Couple over a year ago

Darlington

"Fab is now about two thirds if not three quarters "single guys:.

If you want to get meets as a single guy, get off fab, go to social events and go to clubs.

Even then you're not guaranteed anything but at least you are getting seen and networking which only raises your chances.

At this point Fab might as well stand for Full of Agitated Blokes) because these posts are now daily.

There was another thread the other day about how thats gotten difficult now for a single guy as well though? "

Isn't that a rather generic cop out though? Just an easy way to not even try?

Speaking from.experiance we ran a social.event last year where 15 guys had their name down on the guest list.

2 turned up.

I (male half) attended what was a supposed to be a 6 man gangbang last year. 1 other guy showed and left pretty quick. Had the lady all to myself all afternoon.

Often go.to the club with my wife. Have litterally witnessed single guys legging it out of the club because they can't deal with it.

Now yeah..that might be just how things are in our area. But in our area its all single.guys on fab and then couples and single lady's putting in their profile what a bunch of cop.outs and ni shows these guys are. Meanwhile you come on fab and it's an endless streams of guys posting how they can't get meets.

I litterally can not get meets on fab with my single profile..so I don't try that hard. Clubs and socials...best way to go. Yeah, I'm part of a couple (which makes it even harder because there's a insane assumption I'm.a cheat by some people on here) but if I can get meets on.my.own, others can.

Just get off the phone or computer and acctually put yourself.out there. You can't be any worse off than your current situation can you?

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By *ananaman41Man over a year ago

Dublin

"Fab is now about two thirds if not three quarters "single guys:.

If you want to get meets as a single guy, get off fab, go to social events and go to clubs.

Even then you're not guaranteed anything but at least you are getting seen and networking which only raises your chances.

At this point Fab might as well stand for Full of Agitated Blokes) because these posts are now daily.

There was another thread the other day about how thats gotten difficult now for a single guy as well though?

Isn't that a rather generic cop out though? Just an easy way to not even try?

Speaking from.experiance we ran a social.event last year where 15 guys had their name down on the guest list.

2 turned up.

I (male half) attended what was a supposed to be a 6 man gangbang last year. 1 other guy showed and left pretty quick. Had the lady all to myself all afternoon.

Often go.to the club with my wife. Have litterally witnessed single guys legging it out of the club because they can't deal with it.

Just get off the phone or computer and acctually put yourself.out there. You can't be any worse off than your current situation can you? "

Me? No im perfectly fine on here.

Im just summarising the previous thread thats all

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By *ananaman41Man over a year ago

Dublin

"Fab is now about two thirds if not three quarters "single guys:.

If you want to get meets as a single guy, get off fab, go to social events and go to clubs.

Even then you're not guaranteed anything but at least you are getting seen and networking which only raises your chances.

At this point Fab might as well stand for Full of Agitated Blokes) because these posts are now daily.

There was another thread the other day about how thats gotten difficult now for a single guy as well though?

What do you mean by difficult?

Well my recollection of the thread was that the consensus was that women arent receptive to men trying to make conversation in social settings these days. So theyre buggered all round

That's a pretty sweeping statement and certainly not true in my experience. "

As i said, thats just my recollection of the thread. Dont shoot the messenger

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By *ehindHerEyesCouple over a year ago

SomewhereOnlyWeKnow

"Why is it always the fault of women, if men don't get what they want (in general)?"

Totally this, why is it automatically a woman's fault?

Tg x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

At the end of the day it’s about managing your expectations, having patience and understanding what swinging is.

A lot of people have joined here thinking it’s a quick and easy way to hook up with anyone they want.

The best thing for anyone that’s new is to go to clubs and socials. Meet people in person build up verifications. Gain experience from others, find out if you are comfortable around others (it’s not for everyone)

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I'd say in no uncertain terms that you should never expect sex off this site lol. If you want a more level playing field try tinder.

Yes, If a lady should respond and offer continued converse, you realise her true interest. The shared dynamic of chat is effortless and doesn't make you feel you're chasing a dead rubber.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why is it always the fault of women, if men don't get what they want (in general)?"

Cos women are meant to be support people aren't they?

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By *elaninMaverickWoman over a year ago

near Putney Heath

The numbers game that this place is will then turn up some results for you

The only trouble with blanket cut and paste messaging is that you can usually tell, especially if they messaged with the exact same message the week before and forgot they had sent it to you!"

Lol! this is too funny!!!

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By *elaninMaverickWoman over a year ago

near Putney Heath

"Just remember a couples profile consists of a bloke ..and a bird ..send messages you're prepared for both of them to read

^^^This! Mr KC does not have nice tits or take kindly to being called babe or doll or darlin'

Actually, nor do I

I'm dying.....lol!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I generally only get messages from folk I've interacted with via the forums.....its nice but 9 times out of 10 they live hundreds of miles away. Very rarely do I get a reply or a first message from anyone outwith the forums.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think the moral of the Ops story is - you be you, hun!

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By *elaninMaverickWoman over a year ago

near Putney Heath

This thread is quite entertaining for me. I do hang around in the Manopshere and I hear the same thing. Women are to blame for all of men's woes. Men are to blame for all of women's woes. I do feel sorry for the lad..oh wait he's older than me. Sorry for the Mr. I don't meet any of this man preferences for women especially my low libido and lack of public nudity but I am inundated on a daily basis with men's messages. My profile isn't perfectly honed. Maybe it's because I live in London. I only meet guys who live near me anyway. I've never been to a social or a club.

All I can say sir, maybe you are a bit like Marmite or Champagne.....and in London...people drink Processo and eat kale. I work for a supermarket. The Marmite and the Champagne stays on the shelf forever the Prosecco and the kale sells out every damned day!!

Me? I'm Cava and Broccoli..people will take me if they can't get Prosecco and Kale. Lol!

You have value...just need to find the people who like you more than others.

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By *iaisonseekerMan over a year ago

Liverpool

"This thread is quite entertaining for me. I do hang around in the Manopshere and I hear the same thing. Women are to blame for all of men's woes. Men are to blame for all of women's woes. I do feel sorry for the lad..oh wait he's older than me. Sorry for the Mr. I don't meet any of this man preferences for women especially my low libido and lack of public nudity but I am inundated on a daily basis with men's messages. My profile isn't perfectly honed. Maybe it's because I live in London. I only meet guys who live near me anyway. I've never been to a social or a club.

Me? I'm Cava and Broccoli..people will take me if they can't get Prosecco and Kale. Lol!

You have value...just need to find the people who like you more than others."

I think Jim Morrison had a point when he sang: "Women seem wicked, when you're unwanted."

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By *inky_couple2020Couple over a year ago

North West

Me? I'm Cava and Broccoli..people will take me if they can't get Prosecco and Kale. Lol!

You have value...just need to find the people who like you more than others."

*Applause*

It should be noted that other brassicas are also available

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Me? I'm Cava and Broccoli..people will take me if they can't get Prosecco and Kale. Lol!

You have value...just need to find the people who like you more than others.

*Applause*

It should be noted that other brassicas are also available

I was about to applaud this too!

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By *uckslut and MCouple over a year ago

Poole

"You scratch your head because your profile is bringing no attention your way. So, you ask for advice on the forum etc, take notes then re-work your bio....

I'm going to be on so many womens' naughty list now! Oh, well you would never of chatted or met me anyway.

Here here, we quite clearly say, we're only playing if we have a meet or status up. Yet, we get bombarded daily with offers to meet, or chat with a veiw to meet.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Many erudite, well thought out posts from men on this thread. Bravo!

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By *annaBeStrongMan over a year ago

wokingham

Fabs is dating/hookup/swinging hard mode for men

I’ve had more dates/hookups and more swinging, in the last 6 months using tinder/hinge, then I have since I started on fab years ago

Don’t hate the player, hate the game. And if it’s that bad, don’t play. The way the website is made makes it incredibly difficult to get noticed and you’ll waste hours upon hours crafting messages that go unopened or to people that aren’t interested.

Personally, I found fab was more enjoyable as a guy when I just stopped using it to look. If someone messages me, great, and sometimes if it’s a new profile o might message them, but you should have better things to do then sending out messages with a 1% chance of even being opened

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I do the Fabmin for our couple account. All I can say is it has been an incredibly enlightening experience to see the other side of the dating world, albeit on a swingers site.

There seems to be a belief that because my partner is looking for threesomes that she will play with just about anyone. Without trying to sound arrogant, there's lots of guys trying their luck who wouldn't dare approach her in a bar. She wants to play with lots of guys but she needs to be attracted to them.

The messages are mostly inane 'How's u?' and 'meet today?'. I delete all of those immediately.

The majority of our messages are like that, either from guys that my partner would never dream of playing with or just don't put any effort in.

The very few that are better looking and can construct a message we always reply to. They're not always my partners type but we will get back to them.

My partner wants to meet 1-2 guys every week but its also hard as a couple to find the right guys. We want attractive guys who live not too far from us. There doesn't seem to be many!

We get between 50-100 messages a day. I have to delete most of them.

We've met many more on Feeld. Not sure if that's a different crowd on there.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I do the Fabmin for our couple account. All I can say is it has been an incredibly enlightening experience to see the other side of the dating world, albeit on a swingers site.

The messages are mostly inane 'How's u?' and 'meet today?'. I delete all of those immediately.

The majority of our messages are like that, either from guys that my partner would never dream of playing with or just don't put any effort in.

The very few that are better looking and can construct a message we always reply to. They're not always my partners type but we will get back to them.

My partner wants to meet 1-2 guys every week but its also hard as a couple to find the right guys. We want attractive guys who live not too far from us. There doesn't seem to be many!

We get between 50-100 messages a day. I have to delete most of them.

We've met many more on Feeld. Not sure if that's a different crowd on there. "

Have you considered turning off messages from single men and just approaching them yourselves? The admin of 50-100 messages a day isn't really worth it, surely?

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By *2000ManMan over a year ago

Worthing

I use fab as a social club. Lots of topics up for discussion. Works well for me.

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By *eyeYCouple over a year ago

Nr Leicester

Mr here. I sympathise with the guy's on here. I was a Single man on an alternative site some time ago (3 letters starting with S) met 4 couples and 6 ladies over an 18 month period and had a great time.

It seems to have shifted since then and I personally would focus on socials rather than playing a diminishing number game now.

The site can be hard enough work as couple, so can imagine how much more difficult it is for single guy's l!!

I hasten to add that is not a reflection on FAB, just how time's have changed and the disposable, instant Amazon style culture we find ourselves in.. Good luck!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Shouldn't tar all women or all men with the same brush."

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Mr here. I sympathise with the guy's on here. I was a Single man on an alternative site some time ago (3 letters starting with S) met 4 couples and 6 ladies over an 18 month period and had a great time.

It seems to have shifted since then and I personally would focus on socials rather than playing a diminishing number game now.

The site can be hard enough work as couple, so can imagine how much more difficult it is for single guy's l!!

**I hasten to add that is not a reflection on FAB, just how time's have changed and the disposable, instant Amazon style culture we find ourselves in..** Good luck!"

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By *ehindHerEyesCouple over a year ago

SomewhereOnlyWeKnow

It seems to have shifted since then and I personally would focus on socials rather than playing a diminishing number game now.

The site can be hard enough work as couple, so can imagine how much more difficult it is for single guy's l!!

I hasten to add that is not a reflection on FAB, just how time's have changed and the disposable, instant Amazon style culture we find ourselves in.. Good luck!"

Do you think it’s more difficult as a single guy on fab rather than a guy in a couple?

I have found the reverse of this. As a single I chatted a lot and now cobwebs…

Marc

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By *acey_RedWoman over a year ago

Liverpool

"I do the Fabmin for our couple account. All I can say is it has been an incredibly enlightening experience to see the other side of the dating world, albeit on a swingers site.

The messages are mostly inane 'How's u?' and 'meet today?'. I delete all of those immediately.

The majority of our messages are like that, either from guys that my partner would never dream of playing with or just don't put any effort in.

The very few that are better looking and can construct a message we always reply to. They're not always my partners type but we will get back to them.

My partner wants to meet 1-2 guys every week but its also hard as a couple to find the right guys. We want attractive guys who live not too far from us. There doesn't seem to be many!

We get between 50-100 messages a day. I have to delete most of them.

We've met many more on Feeld. Not sure if that's a different crowd on there.

Have you considered turning off messages from single men and just approaching them yourselves? The admin of 50-100 messages a day isn't really worth it, surely?"

That's what I used to do but found it still didn't work very well for me as men tended to get too excited by being contacted first and took it that I was 100% up for sleeping with them from the get go. Now I pretty much just stick to clubs and socials.

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By *acey_RedWoman over a year ago

Liverpool

It seems to have shifted since then and I personally would focus on socials rather than playing a diminishing number game now.

The site can be hard enough work as couple, so can imagine how much more difficult it is for single guy's l!!

I hasten to add that is not a reflection on FAB, just how time's have changed and the disposable, instant Amazon style culture we find ourselves in.. Good luck!"

It's the instantaneousness (is that even a word?) I tend to struggle with. I feel like I'm hard work for wanting to get to know someone. People regularly complain its not a dating site if you want a social first even though I don't see it as a date. I feel like I'm doing it wrong so I give up. At least at socials and clubs there's an expectation of actually speaking to each other

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It seems to have shifted since then and I personally would focus on socials rather than playing a diminishing number game now.

The site can be hard enough work as couple, so can imagine how much more difficult it is for single guy's l!!

I hasten to add that is not a reflection on FAB, just how time's have changed and the disposable, instant Amazon style culture we find ourselves in.. Good luck!

Do you think it’s more difficult as a single guy on fab rather than a guy in a couple?

I have found the reverse of this. As a single I chatted a lot and now cobwebs…

Marc"

But you have a partner - someone special in your life. And...sex. Which is why most single males find it so tough here. I can't see how it's harder?

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By *eybert77Man over a year ago

Ramsey

Me? I'm Cava and Broccoli..people will take me if they can't get Prosecco and Kale. Lol!

You have value...just need to find the people who like you more than others."

Love this

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By *ehindHerEyesCouple over a year ago

SomewhereOnlyWeKnow

It seems to have shifted since then and I personally would focus on socials rather than playing a diminishing number game now.

The site can be hard enough work as couple, so can imagine how much more difficult it is for single guy's l!!

I hasten to add that is not a reflection on FAB, just how time's have changed and the disposable, instant Amazon style culture we find ourselves in.. Good luck!

Do you think it’s more difficult as a single guy on fab rather than a guy in a couple?

I have found the reverse of this. As a single I chatted a lot and now cobwebs…

Marc

But you have a partner - someone special in your life. And...sex. Which is why most single males find it so tough here. I can't see how it's harder?"

Sorry I didn’t realise this was just about meeting up for sex thread. Silly me thinking that the social aspect was important too and that’s where single guys struggle, actually talking to people to begin with

Marc

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It seems to have shifted since then and I personally would focus on socials rather than playing a diminishing number game now.

The site can be hard enough work as couple, so can imagine how much more difficult it is for single guy's l!!

I hasten to add that is not a reflection on FAB, just how time's have changed and the disposable, instant Amazon style culture we find ourselves in.. Good luck!

Do you think it’s more difficult as a single guy on fab rather than a guy in a couple?

I have found the reverse of this. As a single I chatted a lot and now cobwebs…

Marc

But you have a partner - someone special in your life. And...sex. Which is why most single males find it so tough here. I can't see how it's harder?

Marc"

It was a question, Marc. As a single woman, I won't look at things the same way. Do you find social chats develop from the forum or not now that you're in a couple?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ehindHerEyesCouple over a year ago

SomewhereOnlyWeKnow

It seems to have shifted since then and I personally would focus on socials rather than playing a diminishing number game now.

The site can be hard enough work as couple, so can imagine how much more difficult it is for single guy's l!!

I hasten to add that is not a reflection on FAB, just how time's have changed and the disposable, instant Amazon style culture we find ourselves in.. Good luck!

Do you think it’s more difficult as a single guy on fab rather than a guy in a couple?

I have found the reverse of this. As a single I chatted a lot and now cobwebs…

Marc

But you have a partner - someone special in your life. And...sex. Which is why most single males find it so tough here. I can't see how it's harder?

Marc

It was a question, Marc. As a single woman, I won't look at things the same way. Do you find social chats develop from the forum or not now that you're in a couple? "

I don’t want to turn this into a woe me comment and yes I have support from the most amazing woman ever. But we have both been devalued because of our relationship. Chats are very few and far between. People we used to speak to on a semi regular basis on our singles profile no longer message and we are seen as no longer worthy of talking to accept maybe from 2 or 3 people that we know from social events and have some banter in the forums.

My perspective from being a single male was that it was easier to talk to people, more interaction and dare I say it more fabs and appreciation for photos etc. an example was my last photo received one fab and that was from TG whereas a single male I occasionally hit 30+ in 24 hours

Marc

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By *annaBeStrongMan over a year ago

wokingham

It seems to have shifted since then and I personally would focus on socials rather than playing a diminishing number game now.

The site can be hard enough work as couple, so can imagine how much more difficult it is for single guy's l!!

I hasten to add that is not a reflection on FAB, just how time's have changed and the disposable, instant Amazon style culture we find ourselves in.. Good luck!

Do you think it’s more difficult as a single guy on fab rather than a guy in a couple?

I have found the reverse of this. As a single I chatted a lot and now cobwebs…

Marc

But you have a partner - someone special in your life. And...sex. Which is why most single males find it so tough here. I can't see how it's harder?

Marc

It was a question, Marc. As a single woman, I won't look at things the same way. Do you find social chats develop from the forum or not now that you're in a couple?

Marc "

I think that’s because as much as we want to pretend fabs is a swinging site, the majority of users are single people looking for other singles

At least I think so anyways. Whenever I search it’s about 1000 guys to every couple and about twice as many single women as couples

However when I was part of a couple on here I found organising meets very easy, but that was quite a few years ago

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think its a mentality thing i dont find it hard to talk get messages from get invites and such at all if i had the free time i used to i think i could have had whatever i wanted but i think its in the head but i talk to people in my job so i think that helps a lot too

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ehindHerEyesCouple over a year ago

SomewhereOnlyWeKnow

It seems to have shifted since then and I personally would focus on socials rather than playing a diminishing number game now.

The site can be hard enough work as couple, so can imagine how much more difficult it is for single guy's l!!

I hasten to add that is not a reflection on FAB, just how time's have changed and the disposable, instant Amazon style culture we find ourselves in.. Good luck!

Do you think it’s more difficult as a single guy on fab rather than a guy in a couple?

I have found the reverse of this. As a single I chatted a lot and now cobwebs…

Marc

But you have a partner - someone special in your life. And...sex. Which is why most single males find it so tough here. I can't see how it's harder?

Marc

It was a question, Marc. As a single woman, I won't look at things the same way. Do you find social chats develop from the forum or not now that you're in a couple?

Marc

I think that’s because as much as we want to pretend fabs is a swinging site, the majority of users are single people looking for other singles

At least I think so anyways. Whenever I search it’s about 1000 guys to every couple and about twice as many single women as couples

However when I was part of a couple on here I found organising meets very easy, but that was quite a few years ago "

Which I guess answers my original question so what though maybe that’s something for a different thread

Marc

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I think its a mentality thing i dont find it hard to talk get messages from get invites and such at all if i had the free time i used to i think i could have had whatever i wanted but i think its in the head but i talk to people in my job so i think that helps a lot too"
but on top of that i dont ask advice i simply do myself i cant help if im an example of all things that make a vagina turn juicy

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *acey_RedWoman over a year ago

Liverpool

It seems to have shifted since then and I personally would focus on socials rather than playing a diminishing number game now.

The site can be hard enough work as couple, so can imagine how much more difficult it is for single guy's l!!

I hasten to add that is not a reflection on FAB, just how time's have changed and the disposable, instant Amazon style culture we find ourselves in.. Good luck!

Do you think it’s more difficult as a single guy on fab rather than a guy in a couple?

I have found the reverse of this. As a single I chatted a lot and now cobwebs…

Marc

But you have a partner - someone special in your life. And...sex. Which is why most single males find it so tough here. I can't see how it's harder?

Marc

It was a question, Marc. As a single woman, I won't look at things the same way. Do you find social chats develop from the forum or not now that you're in a couple?

Marc "

It is unfortunately always going to limit your pool when in a couple compared to being a single and even more so if only wanting to meet together. It's not a judgement of either of you or that you're "not worthy of speaking to", it's simply that a lot of people only wish to meet singles ans that's in their right. Meeting couples is more intimidating, often more work and we all have enough nerves about whether we'll be attracted to someone and like someone when meeting one person and that's doubled when there's two of you. I'm in a relationship but only meet alone and some people aren't interested in that and that's fine.

Also, I don't think the regular forum posts about it are particularly helpful or endearing.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *oeofsussexMan over a year ago

Eastbourne

"Just stop treating getting sex as an Olympic medal event where getting a gold medal (a shag) is the chief objective.

Relax. Enjoy chatting to people. Perve some boobs. Enjoy other aspects of the site, do some socials.

If you get a meet, then great - if not, c’est la vie.

Plenty more women in the big wide world.

What does a bronze medal get you?! And I feel sorry for the dude who finished 4th

2nd place is a handjob.

3rd place is a hot chocolate and maybe a biscuit.

Cor… 3rd place would do me fine thanks! Any higher just a bonus!

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By *oeofsussexMan over a year ago

Eastbourne

Me? I'm Cava and Broccoli..people will take me if they can't get Prosecco and Kale. Lol!

You have value...just need to find the people who like you more than others."

Oh hell, I’ve got a horrible feeling I qualify as mineral water and watercress!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It seems to have shifted since then and I personally would focus on socials rather than playing a diminishing number game now.

The site can be hard enough work as couple, so can imagine how much more difficult it is for single guy's l!!

I hasten to add that is not a reflection on FAB, just how time's have changed and the disposable, instant Amazon style culture we find ourselves in.. Good luck!

Do you think it’s more difficult as a single guy on fab rather than a guy in a couple?

I have found the reverse of this. As a single I chatted a lot and now cobwebs…

Marc

But you have a partner - someone special in your life. And...sex. Which is why most single males find it so tough here. I can't see how it's harder?

Marc

It was a question, Marc. As a single woman, I won't look at things the same way. Do you find social chats develop from the forum or not now that you're in a couple?

Marc "

I don't know enough about the swinging lifestyle to be sure but people who hotlist couples will largely be single males or the male half of the couple won't they - thus the lack of fabs? I think when you've commented before people have said they are giving you space as a couple which seems to make sense? And if people knew one of you but not both they will be less likely to chat to the couples account. There are only a couple of couples accounts I do chat to because of that - where I know exactly who I am talking to. Or I know both people from separate conversations.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It seems to have shifted since then and I personally would focus on socials rather than playing a diminishing number game now.

The site can be hard enough work as couple, so can imagine how much more difficult it is for single guy's l!!

I hasten to add that is not a reflection on FAB, just how time's have changed and the disposable, instant Amazon style culture we find ourselves in.. Good luck!

Do you think it’s more difficult as a single guy on fab rather than a guy in a couple?

I have found the reverse of this. As a single I chatted a lot and now cobwebs…

Marc

But you have a partner - someone special in your life. And...sex. Which is why most single males find it so tough here. I can't see how it's harder?

Marc

It was a question, Marc. As a single woman, I won't look at things the same way. Do you find social chats develop from the forum or not now that you're in a couple?

Marc

I think that’s because as much as we want to pretend fabs is a swinging site, the majority of users are single people looking for other singles

At least I think so anyways. Whenever I search it’s about 1000 guys to every couple and about twice as many single women as couples

However when I was part of a couple on here I found organising meets very easy, but that was quite a few years ago "
the majority of users are single men looking for sex.

But it takes two (or more) to tango, hence the frustration.

From my experience (not mansplaining

) if a single gal is here for sex it's because she has a specific kinky itch she wishes to scartch and fab is more open. So you can find the Dom, sub, bi fella etc, eaiser.

I've not found many who just want any sex the way single men seem to.

Really fab isnt driven by what the majority want, but what those with teh casting vote want.

It's a sex positive site mainly for swingers and non vanilla singles.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *oxesMan over a year ago

Southend, Essex

P.S guys profiles without ANY photo even profile photo get deleted. "

There are so many people who look like a cartoon silhouette it's surprising maybe we should have cartoon silhouette fan club section on fab.

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By *elaninMaverickWoman over a year ago

near Putney Heath

Me? I'm Cava and Broccoli..people will take me if they can't get Prosecco and Kale. Lol!

You have value...just need to find the people who like you more than others.

I think Jim Morrison had a point when he sang: "Women seem wicked, when you're unwanted.""

Probably goes both ways to be honest....I hear a lot of women say there are no good men but I'm like what about your male colleagues, friends and family. I refuse to buy into that trope of gender wars. But that's why I'm a Maverick.

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By *elaninMaverickWoman over a year ago

near Putney Heath

Me? I'm Cava and Broccoli..people will take me if they can't get Prosecco and Kale. Lol!

You have value...just need to find the people who like you more than others.

*Applause*

It should be noted that other brassicas are also available

Thanks. Lol! there's cauliflower rice, pointed spring cabbage and Cavolo nero.

Londoners do have a strange palate...can I find regular cabbage to make a coleslaw? No chance. Lol!

I had some reduced Cavolo nero in the freezer I just chucked in a chicken curry a few days ago. very nice. Lol!

Some people are adverse to curry. Far too spicy for them. Some people on Fab are far too spicy for most. lol!

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By *elaninMaverickWoman over a year ago

near Putney Heath

[Removed by poster at 26/08/22 14:28:16]

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By *elaninMaverickWoman over a year ago

near Putney Heath

(*Applause*

It should be noted that other brassicas are also available

I was about to applaud this too!)

Thanks!

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By *oxesMan over a year ago

Southend, Essex

"I do the Fabmin for our couple account. All I can say is it has been an incredibly enlightening experience to see the other side of the dating world, albeit on a swingers site.

The messages are mostly inane 'How's u?' and 'meet today?'. I delete all of those immediately.

The majority of our messages are like that, either from guys that my partner would never dream of playing with or just don't put any effort in.

The very few that are better looking and can construct a message we always reply to. They're not always my partners type but we will get back to them.

My partner wants to meet 1-2 guys every week but its also hard as a couple to find the right guys. We want attractive guys who live not too far from us. There doesn't seem to be many!

We get between 50-100 messages a day. I have to delete most of them.

We've met many more on Feeld. Not sure if that's a different crowd on there. "

Didn't Feeld used to be 3ndr?

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By *oxesMan over a year ago

Southend, Essex

To be honest, it would be nice to meet somebody for regular meets or NSA but I guess I'm barking up the wrong tree because this is Basically a bisexual straight site.

If you think this is a futile response, let me know. I can take it. Wink, wink.

Are we going to get the gay perspective of Fab? "

Only if someone is willing to write about it.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *elaninMaverickWoman over a year ago

near Putney Heath

(Love this)

Thanks.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I get responses... It's just I'm always "too young" lmfao

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *oxesMan over a year ago

Southend, Essex

It seems to have shifted since then and I personally would focus on socials rather than playing a diminishing number game now.

The site can be hard enough work as couple, so can imagine how much more difficult it is for single guy's l!!

I hasten to add that is not a reflection on FAB, just how time's have changed and the disposable, instant Amazon style culture we find ourselves in.. Good luck!

Do you think it’s more difficult as a single guy on fab rather than a guy in a couple?

I have found the reverse of this. As a single I chatted a lot and now cobwebs…

Marc

But you have a partner - someone special in your life. And...sex. Which is why most single males find it so tough here. I can't see how it's harder?

Marc

It was a question, Marc. As a single woman, I won't look at things the same way. Do you find social chats develop from the forum or not now that you're in a couple?

Marc

I think that’s because as much as we want to pretend fabs is a swinging site, the majority of users are single people looking for other singles

At least I think so anyways. Whenever I search it’s about 1000 guys to every couple and about twice as many single women as couples

However when I was part of a couple on here I found organising meets very easy, but that was quite a few years ago the majority of users are single men looking for sex.

But it takes two (or more) to tango, hence the frustration.

From my experience (not mansplaining

) if a single gal is here for sex it's because she has a specific kinky itch she wishes to scartch and fab is more open. So you can find the Dom, sub, bi fella etc, eaiser.

I've not found many who just want any sex the way single men seem to.

Really fab isnt driven by what the majority want, but what those with teh casting vote want.

It's a sex positive site mainly for swingers and non vanilla singles. "

Fab and the swinging world is amazingly inclusive but love and attraction isn't inclusive. People have their sexual desires wants and fantasy and what they're partners are to look like.

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By *ecadent_DevonMan over a year ago

Okehampton

Life as a single guy on fab is fairly easy to be honest

Check messages - no messages

Have an angry wank

Feel hollow and empty

Logout

Easiest hobby ever

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Life as a single guy on fab is fairly easy to be honest

Check messages - no messages

Have an angry wank

Feel hollow and empty

Logout

Easiest hobby ever "

A man of culture

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *imply DeeWoman over a year ago

Wherever

"Life as a single guy on fab is fairly easy to be honest

Check messages - no messages

Have an angry wank

Feel hollow and empty

Logout

Easiest hobby ever "

I’m afraid you forgot something.

Post a forum thread about it.

That’s how you do it.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *elaninMaverickWoman over a year ago

near Putney Heath

Marc "

Just a quick look at your profile: someone like me, straight, single and never been to socials or clubs, I wouldn't even come across your profile. I've never played with a couple before and your profile states that you are looking for couples.

As a single woman, we have to filter otherwise we get way too many messages.

Personally I'm not bothered about people Fabbing my pictures. I'm more interested in people's minds. For me the body visual is just the icing on the cake.

I'm not saying all women think like this but this is just my perspective.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ecadent_DevonMan over a year ago

Okehampton

"Life as a single guy on fab is fairly easy to be honest

Check messages - no messages

Have an angry wank

Feel hollow and empty

Logout

Easiest hobby ever

I’m afraid you forgot something.

Post a forum thread about it.

That’s how you do it."

You have over-estimated my work ethic

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *imply DeeWoman over a year ago

Wherever

"Life as a single guy on fab is fairly easy to be honest

Check messages - no messages

Have an angry wank

Feel hollow and empty

Logout

Easiest hobby ever

I’m afraid you forgot something.

Post a forum thread about it.

That’s how you do it.

You have over-estimated my work ethic "

I’m sorry

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *elaninMaverickWoman over a year ago

near Putney Heath

Oh hell, I’ve got a horrible feeling I qualify as mineral water and watercress!

Mate trust me when I say the mineral water and the watercress sells out before the Champagne and Marmite. Especially when it's too blooming hot to cook! Lol! Salads and water all summer long.

I know people who refuse to drink anything but mineral water. lol!

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By *elaninMaverickWoman over a year ago

near Putney Heath

But it takes two (or more) to tango, hence the frustration.

From my experience (not mansplaining

) if a single gal is here for sex it's because she has a specific kinky itch she wishes to scartch and fab is more open. So you can find the Dom, sub, bi fella etc, eaiser.

I've not found many who just want any sex the way single men seem to.

Really fab isnt driven by what the majority want, but what those with teh casting vote want.

It's a sex positive site mainly for swingers and non vanilla singles. "

I'm definitely here for the sex positivity because I find dating sites/apps anxiety inducing for me and the single men. Also if I mention sex constantly in my other support groups I'm bound to trigger people. I know people who are sexual trauma survivors, sexually repressed and sexually depressed and something like Fab would bring them out in hives and trigger a trip to the A & E!

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By *ehindHerEyesCouple over a year ago

SomewhereOnlyWeKnow

Marc

As a single woman, we have to filter otherwise we get way too many messages.

Personally I'm not bothered about people Fabbing my pictures. I'm more interested in people's minds. For me the body visual is just the icing on the cake.

I'm not saying all women think like this but this is just my perspective."

Nope we're open to singles too, just meeting as a couple to start with until we find what works for us.

The point Marc was trying to make is that people just don't talk to us even just socially anymore he wasn't even talking about talking with regards to meeting. Basically feeling as if we may as well not bother interacting anymore as it just feels useless.

He was trying to make a point that it's not just single men that get a rough time.

Tg x

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By *elaninMaverickWoman over a year ago

near Putney Heath

"I get responses... It's just I'm always "too young" lmfao

Aww...I mean if you are approaching women old enough to be your mum....I get uneasy when people suggest men young enough to be my child to me....Plus I'm more inclined to sit an home with a cup of tea in my onesie watching some documentary...I think people in their twenties should be out enjoying themselves!! Not cuddling with me! Feels too much like an Oedipus complex for me to be comfortable.

That's just me....try a few cuckold couples though they might be game.

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By *elaninMaverickWoman over a year ago

near Putney Heath

"Life as a single guy on fab is fairly easy to be honest

Check messages - no messages

Have an angry wank

Feel hollow and empty

Logout

Easiest hobby ever "

Well his profile is hidden from me so....More psycho-sexual issues than I can analyse as my hobby.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ecadent_DevonMan over a year ago

Okehampton

"Life as a single guy on fab is fairly easy to be honest

Check messages - no messages

Have an angry wank

Feel hollow and empty

Logout

Easiest hobby ever

Well his profile is hidden from me so....More psycho-sexual issues than I can analyse as my hobby."

If this is directed at me I must confess I’m only hidden because I was getting too many messages of the 1 to 5 word variety and I couldn’t keep up, my hobby had turned into a job! Now those that know, know..

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By *andyfloss2000Woman over a year ago

ashford

Reading this it sadly rings true! Men must get very disheartened here! As someone said its merely a numbers thing x

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By *eyeYCouple over a year ago

Nr Leicester

[Removed by poster at 26/08/22 16:11:07]

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By *elaninMaverickWoman over a year ago

near Putney Heath

"Life as a single guy on fab is fairly easy to be honest

Check messages - no messages

Have an angry wank

Feel hollow and empty

Logout

Easiest hobby ever

Well his profile is hidden from me so....More psycho-sexual issues than I can analyse as my hobby.

Lol! No messages vs. too many messages. I definitely can't help you. I try to be realistic and look for balance in my life. That way I have no regrets when I finally kick the bucket. The others are welcome to try to help you find your sweet spot though.

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By *rHotNottsMan over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Maybe you’re trying so hard and not being yourself . I’ve never asked for profile advice, often dont read profiles fully until after chatting or meeting, as I’m much more interested in the real person than some text. I put up pics even against advice of people I’m seeing because I think they are funny

Just be authentic man

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Right face, right place, right time. Make yourself known. Make yourself available. Wait your turn.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I do the Fabmin for our couple account. All I can say is it has been an incredibly enlightening experience to see the other side of the dating world, albeit on a swingers site.

The messages are mostly inane 'How's u?' and 'meet today?'. I delete all of those immediately.

The majority of our messages are like that, either from guys that my partner would never dream of playing with or just don't put any effort in.

The very few that are better looking and can construct a message we always reply to. They're not always my partners type but we will get back to them.

My partner wants to meet 1-2 guys every week but its also hard as a couple to find the right guys. We want attractive guys who live not too far from us. There doesn't seem to be many!

We get between 50-100 messages a day. I have to delete most of them.

We've met many more on Feeld. Not sure if that's a different crowd on there. "

Without sounding rude your post comes accross as tho she is very judgemental of guys. The word "attractive" keeps coming up. Dont you feel you are being dismissive of some genuine guys who might not mess you about just because you dont find them attractive? There is more to life than looks and they are subjective anyway. Just my opinion on your post

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I do the Fabmin for our couple account. All I can say is it has been an incredibly enlightening experience to see the other side of the dating world, albeit on a swingers site.

The messages are mostly inane 'How's u?' and 'meet today?'. I delete all of those immediately.

The majority of our messages are like that, either from guys that my partner would never dream of playing with or just don't put any effort in.

The very few that are better looking and can construct a message we always reply to. They're not always my partners type but we will get back to them.

My partner wants to meet 1-2 guys every week but its also hard as a couple to find the right guys. We want attractive guys who live not too far from us. There doesn't seem to be many!

We get between 50-100 messages a day. I have to delete most of them.

We've met many more on Feeld. Not sure if that's a different crowd on there.

Should she fuck guys that she doesn't find attractive? Are you actually suggesting that? Would you fuck someone you don't find attractive?

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By *etwifeandhim69Couple over a year ago

Darlington

"I do the Fabmin for our couple account. All I can say is it has been an incredibly enlightening experience to see the other side of the dating world, albeit on a swingers site.

The messages are mostly inane 'How's u?' and 'meet today?'. I delete all of those immediately.

The majority of our messages are like that, either from guys that my partner would never dream of playing with or just don't put any effort in.

The very few that are better looking and can construct a message we always reply to. They're not always my partners type but we will get back to them.

My partner wants to meet 1-2 guys every week but its also hard as a couple to find the right guys. We want attractive guys who live not too far from us. There doesn't seem to be many!

We get between 50-100 messages a day. I have to delete most of them.

We've met many more on Feeld. Not sure if that's a different crowd on there.

You are the problem and you don't even realise it do you?

Of course there is more to life than looks but this isn't a dating site is it? She's either attracted or she's not. That's step number one. Whining about "genuine guys" means jack shit if a woman dosent fancy them.

Get over it. This is the exact bullshit a lot of ladies and couples who meet guys go through. Being told no but then getting on their high horse about it.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ananaman41Man over a year ago

Dublin

"I do the Fabmin for our couple account. All I can say is it has been an incredibly enlightening experience to see the other side of the dating world, albeit on a swingers site.

The messages are mostly inane 'How's u?' and 'meet today?'. I delete all of those immediately.

The majority of our messages are like that, either from guys that my partner would never dream of playing with or just don't put any effort in.

The very few that are better looking and can construct a message we always reply to. They're not always my partners type but we will get back to them.

My partner wants to meet 1-2 guys every week but its also hard as a couple to find the right guys. We want attractive guys who live not too far from us. There doesn't seem to be many!

We get between 50-100 messages a day. I have to delete most of them.

We've met many more on Feeld. Not sure if that's a different crowd on there.

Should she fuck guys that she doesn't find attractive? Are you actually suggesting that? Would you fuck someone you don't find attractive? "

I wont answer for that guy in question, but in a more general sense, yes lots of men will fuck women on here who they dont find attractive. Its the 'any port in a storm' mindset. Which is fair enough i guess. Cant argue with human nature