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For the love of orgasms….guys….
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Please stop obsessing over squirting and gushing!
I have multiple messages asking me if I’m a squirter/gusher. Saying they hope I do/can after a the conversation goes well. Complete lady boner killer!
It’s just not important, it’s not the be all and end all, I have amazing orgasms either way! Surely you should be all about the orgasms whether or not I can turn them into a fountain?
If you pressure, and expect, and obsess over it, then you don’t deserve it anyway!
Get your heads out of porn land and into the person you’re pleasuring!
Rant. Over!
As you were!
P.s I’m eating cake. I’ll be fine in 5 mins.
 |
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By *nobyMan
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"Please stop obsessing over squirting and gushing!
I have multiple messages asking me if I’m a squirter/gusher. Saying they hope I do/can after a the conversation goes well. Complete lady boner killer!
It’s just not important, it’s not the be all and end all, I have amazing orgasms either way! Surely you should be all about the orgasms whether or not I can turn them into a fountain?
If you pressure, and expect, and obsess over it, then you don’t deserve it anyway!
Get your heads out of porn land and into the person you’re pleasuring!
Rant. Over!
As you were!
P.s I’m eating cake. I’ll be fine in 5 mins.
"
Well said! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Please stop obsessing over squirting and gushing!
I have multiple messages asking me if I’m a squirter/gusher. Saying they hope I do/can after a the conversation goes well. Complete lady boner killer!
It’s just not important, it’s not the be all and end all, I have amazing orgasms either way! Surely you should be all about the orgasms whether or not I can turn them into a fountain?
If you pressure, and expect, and obsess over it, then you don’t deserve it anyway!
Get your heads out of porn land and into the person you’re pleasuring!
Rant. Over!
As you were!
P.s I’m eating cake. I’ll be fine in 5 mins.
"
It’s just piss anyway innit? |
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It’s chocolate and hazlenut,
It has lots of squirty cream! This slice of cake is more appealing than my bipolar vagina apparently!
"
...no way that takes you 5 whole minutes to eat, I'd have that done in under 60 seconds |
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OP I am with you on this. Men do seem rather obsessed with the question. I am not a lover of it, I tell them this but it falls on mostly deaf ears.
In fact I'm of the opinion that I'd rather not do it, give me someone who can make me orgasm the "traditional" way and not the theatrical, danger of drowning squirting way please.
I've had a couple of meets where my opinion was ignored, and what then happened can only be liked to someone trying to unblock a toilet with a plunger. Except it was his fingers in my vagina!
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By *_Mr.K_xMan
over a year ago
North Worcestershire |
"
It’s chocolate and hazlenut,
It has lots of squirty cream! This slice of cake is more appealing than my bipolar vagina apparently!
"
Noiiiiccee.... I love a good cake.... but for heavens sake, please tell me it has a flake? And in your mouth it melts and is lush to take? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"OP I am with you on this. Men do seem rather obsessed with the question. I am not a lover of it, I tell them this but it falls on mostly deaf ears.
In fact I'm of the opinion that I'd rather not do it, give me someone who can make me orgasm the "traditional" way and not the theatrical, danger of drowning squirting way please.
I've had a couple of meets where my opinion was ignored, and what then happened can only be liked to someone trying to unblock a toilet with a plunger. Except it was his fingers in my vagina!
"
Exactly! I’m not even a squirting fan but guys seem obsessed with it! |
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"
It’s chocolate and hazlenut,
It has lots of squirty cream! This slice of cake is more appealing than my bipolar vagina apparently!
...no way that takes you 5 whole minutes to eat, I'd have that done in under 60 seconds "
It took 4.23 minutes. And now I’m going to vomit. So it was a bit pointless really! I should have wanked  |
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"Please stop obsessing over squirting and gushing!
I have multiple messages asking me if I’m a squirter/gusher. Saying they hope I do/can after a the conversation goes well. Complete lady boner killer!
It’s just not important, it’s not the be all and end all, I have amazing orgasms either way! Surely you should be all about the orgasms whether or not I can turn them into a fountain?
If you pressure, and expect, and obsess over it, then you don’t deserve it anyway!
Get your heads out of porn land and into the person you’re pleasuring!
Rant. Over!
As you were!
P.s I’m eating cake. I’ll be fine in 5 mins.
"
Well said OP  I've never had a guy make me squirt...always let them know that when they ask 'Do I squirt'  I have very wet Orgasms that feel real good so not bothered if I never do ever squirt!! |
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"
It’s chocolate and hazlenut,
It has lots of squirty cream! This slice of cake is more appealing than my bipolar vagina apparently!
Noiiiiccee.... I love a good cake.... but for heavens sake, please tell me it has a flake? And in your mouth it melts and is lush to take?"
It had a Fererro Rocher On top and a surprise one inside.
Definitely better than my vagina. I’m going to have to start popping things inside as a surprise gift every time someone goes down on me now |
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"
It’s chocolate and hazlenut,
It has lots of squirty cream! This slice of cake is more appealing than my bipolar vagina apparently!
...no way that takes you 5 whole minutes to eat, I'd have that done in under 60 seconds
It took 4.23 minutes. And now I’m going to vomit. So it was a bit pointless really! I should have wanked "
... oh my goodness, cake AFTER wank! |
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By *_Mr.K_xMan
over a year ago
North Worcestershire |
I'm not obsessed with it, I couldn't really care.. as everything else that goes with it, the chat, the flirt, the neck kisses, the breathing, the amazing sex itself should be all that matters
With that said, it was a nice 'happy accident' to find out on a recent meet that this happened lol |
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"I'm not obsessed with it, I couldn't really care.. as everything else that goes with it, the chat, the flirt, the neck kisses, the breathing, the amazing sex itself should be all that matters
With that said, it was a nice 'happy accident' to find out on a recent meet that this happened lol "
The Bob Ross of orgasms |
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"
It’s chocolate and hazlenut,
It has lots of squirty cream! This slice of cake is more appealing than my bipolar vagina apparently!
...no way that takes you 5 whole minutes to eat, I'd have that done in under 60 seconds
It took 4.23 minutes. And now I’m going to vomit. So it was a bit pointless really! I should have wanked
... oh my goodness, cake AFTER wank! "
I’m doing this all wrong!!!! |
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By *_Mr.K_xMan
over a year ago
North Worcestershire |
"
It’s chocolate and hazlenut,
It has lots of squirty cream! This slice of cake is more appealing than my bipolar vagina apparently!
Noiiiiccee.... I love a good cake.... but for heavens sake, please tell me it has a flake? And in your mouth it melts and is lush to take?
It had a Fererro Rocher On top and a surprise one inside.
Definitely better than my vagina. I’m going to have to start popping things inside as a surprise gift every time someone goes down on me now "
Absolutely down for this.. that's a better surprise than squinting.
Imagine finding a kinder egg or Ferrero rocher in there lol x |
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By *KG12Couple
over a year ago
Burnley |
"
It’s chocolate and hazlenut,
It has lots of squirty cream! This slice of cake is more appealing than my bipolar vagina apparently!
Noiiiiccee.... I love a good cake.... but for heavens sake, please tell me it has a flake? And in your mouth it melts and is lush to take?
It had a Fererro Rocher On top and a surprise one inside.
Definitely better than my vagina. I’m going to have to start popping things inside as a surprise gift every time someone goes down on me now "
You may be faced with a barrage of requests now, advising what they want as a gift |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Abso-bloody-lutely!
I can, but I prefer not to. I don't have an orgasm. It just embarrasses me and I feel out of control. The last chap to do it wouldn't bloody stop. Leave me alone! |
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"Abso-bloody-lutely!
I can, but I prefer not to. I don't have an orgasm. It just embarrasses me and I feel out of control. The last chap to do it wouldn't bloody stop. Leave me alone! "
Yes a lady up there referred to it as a toilet plunger! It hurts!!!!!!
It’s happened to me with slower more sensual movements. I guess it’s all down to the skill and know how, as well as studying the one you’re with at the time, the level of “turned on-ness”, and connection. But the ones who obsess and “plunge” just end up causing vaginal dryness. It’s quite ironic really. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Abso-bloody-lutely!
I can, but I prefer not to. I don't have an orgasm. It just embarrasses me and I feel out of control. The last chap to do it wouldn't bloody stop. Leave me alone!
Yes a lady up there referred to it as a toilet plunger! It hurts!!!!!!
It’s happened to me with slower more sensual movements. I guess it’s all down to the skill and know how, as well as studying the one you’re with at the time, the level of “turned on-ness”, and connection. But the ones who obsess and “plunge” just end up causing vaginal dryness. It’s quite ironic really. "
I felt exactly that my toilet was being plunged. Over and over. And then shaking his arm around to show off the droplets.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Completely with the ladies on this. I think men should know that squirting is not necessarily a pleasure experience. Just make us orgasm. We'll be grateful! |
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I agree. Enjoying the whole experience is what makes it worth while. Squirting/gushing if it’s meant to happen will happen as part of the whole experience.
No need to just obsess over that. There’s plenty of other things to enjoy too
Xxx |
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"Please stop obsessing over squirting and gushing!
I have multiple messages asking me if I’m a squirter/gusher. Saying they hope I do/can after a the conversation goes well. Complete lady boner killer!
It’s just not important, it’s not the be all and end all, I have amazing orgasms either way! Surely you should be all about the orgasms whether or not I can turn them into a fountain?
If you pressure, and expect, and obsess over it, then you don’t deserve it anyway!
Get your heads out of porn land and into the person you’re pleasuring!
Rant. Over!
As you were!
P.s I’m eating cake. I’ll be fine in 5 mins.
"
I hope its a phallus shaped éclair.  |
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By *_Mr.K_xMan
over a year ago
North Worcestershire |
"I'm not obsessed with it, I couldn't really care.. as everything else that goes with it, the chat, the flirt, the neck kisses, the breathing, the amazing sex itself should be all that matters
With that said, it was a nice 'happy accident' to find out on a recent meet that this happened lol
The Bob Ross of orgasms "
 "I'm gonna paint a tree.... right over there"
Random fact, I share the same birthday as Bob Ross |
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By *_Mr.K_xMan
over a year ago
North Worcestershire |
"…5 mins!
It’s a better cake than mine 
It cost £4.50 for one slice, it had better be the best 5 minute cake high I’ve ever had  "
The world's most epic cake followed by the world's most epic sex seems like the absolute perfect night.. name anything better lol |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
If you can finish your cake in 5 minutes then the slice wasn't big enough.
As for the other issue? I suppose you could just piss on him to make him feel better and just make some 'ooh, ooh' noises if he's starting to get irritating?
A |
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"…5 mins!
It’s a better cake than mine
It cost £4.50 for one slice, it had better be the best 5 minute cake high I’ve ever had
The world's most epic cake followed by the world's most epic sex seems like the absolute perfect night.. name anything better lol"
As long as the whole thing takes under 10 mins I’m in |
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By *_Mr.K_xMan
over a year ago
North Worcestershire |
"…5 mins!
It’s a better cake than mine
It cost £4.50 for one slice, it had better be the best 5 minute cake high I’ve ever had
The world's most epic cake followed by the world's most epic sex seems like the absolute perfect night.. name anything better lol
As long as the whole thing takes under 10 mins I’m in "
Make it 15? Me too |
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"…5 mins!
It’s a better cake than mine
It cost £4.50 for one slice, it had better be the best 5 minute cake high I’ve ever had
The world's most epic cake followed by the world's most epic sex seems like the absolute perfect night.. name anything better lol
As long as the whole thing takes under 10 mins I’m in
Make it 15? Me too"
Cake eating daisy chain? Should take approximately 8 minutes. Then we can watch Star Wars in bed please? |
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"…5 mins!
It’s a better cake than mine
It cost £4.50 for one slice, it had better be the best 5 minute cake high I’ve ever had
The world's most epic cake followed by the world's most epic sex seems like the absolute perfect night.. name anything better lol
As long as the whole thing takes under 10 mins I’m in
Make it 15? Me too
Cake eating daisy chain? Should take approximately 8 minutes. Then we can watch Star Wars in bed please? "
A new hope?  |
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By *_Mr.K_xMan
over a year ago
North Worcestershire |
"…5 mins!
It’s a better cake than mine
It cost £4.50 for one slice, it had better be the best 5 minute cake high I’ve ever had
The world's most epic cake followed by the world's most epic sex seems like the absolute perfect night.. name anything better lol
As long as the whole thing takes under 10 mins I’m in
Make it 15? Me too
Cake eating daisy chain? Should take approximately 8 minutes. Then we can watch Star Wars in bed please? "
Absolutely... which Star Wars though?? A whole different debate x |
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"…5 mins!
It’s a better cake than mine
It cost £4.50 for one slice, it had better be the best 5 minute cake high I’ve ever had
The world's most epic cake followed by the world's most epic sex seems like the absolute perfect night.. name anything better lol
As long as the whole thing takes under 10 mins I’m in
Make it 15? Me too
Cake eating daisy chain? Should take approximately 8 minutes. Then we can watch Star Wars in bed please?
A new hope? "
A New Hope indeed  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Please stop obsessing over squirting and gushing!
I have multiple messages asking me if I’m a squirter/gusher. Saying they hope I do/can after a the conversation goes well. Complete lady boner killer!
It’s just not important, it’s not the be all and end all, I have amazing orgasms either way! Surely you should be all about the orgasms whether or not I can turn them into a fountain?
If you pressure, and expect, and obsess over it, then you don’t deserve it anyway!
Get your heads out of porn land and into the person you’re pleasuring!
Rant. Over!
As you were!
P.s I’m eating cake. I’ll be fine in 5 mins.
"
Surely eating a doughnut would be better |
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By *dfabMan
over a year ago
Dunboyne |
"Please stop obsessing over squirting and gushing!
I have multiple messages asking me if I’m a squirter/gusher. Saying they hope I do/can after a the conversation goes well. Complete lady boner killer!
It’s just not important, it’s not the be all and end all, I have amazing orgasms either way! Surely you should be all about the orgasms whether or not I can turn them into a fountain?
If you pressure, and expect, and obsess over it, then you don’t deserve it anyway!
Get your heads out of porn land and into the person you’re pleasuring!
Rant. Over!
As you were!
P.s I’m eating cake. I’ll be fine in 5 mins.
"
Completely agree
Orgasm is the ideal but mutual enjoyment is the goal. If someone gets wet during the process, enjoy that too but the whole reason for being there is to enjoy each other as much as you can  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"OP I am with you on this. Men do seem rather obsessed with the question. I am not a lover of it, I tell them this but it falls on mostly deaf ears.
In fact I'm of the opinion that I'd rather not do it, give me someone who can make me orgasm the "traditional" way and not the theatrical, danger of drowning squirting way please.
I've had a couple of meets where my opinion was ignored, and what then happened can only be liked to someone trying to unblock a toilet with a plunger. Except it was his fingers in my vagina!
"
I’m guessing the obsession stems from what is popular in porn? A bit like cumming in women’s faces. Men seem obsessed with that too. |
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"If a guy is shoogling your fanny in a way you really don't like, why in the name of god wouldn't you say you don't like it "
Shoogling, excellent word. I have have spoken up to tell them to stop, and the look of disbelief that I hadn't been enjoying it was laughable. I was once asked if I was sure... ummmm yeah I'm sure, you're not churning butter mate. Cool your jets! |
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By *dfabMan
over a year ago
Dunboyne |
"If a guy is shoogling your fanny in a way you really don't like, why in the name of god wouldn't you say you don't like it
Shoogling, excellent word. I have have spoken up to tell them to stop, and the look of disbelief that I hadn't been enjoying it was laughable. I was once asked if I was sure... ummmm yeah I'm sure, you're not churning butter mate. Cool your jets! "
If he couldn't read your signs,he isn't worth shagging |
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"If a guy is shoogling your fanny in a way you really don't like, why in the name of god wouldn't you say you don't like it
Shoogling, excellent word. I have have spoken up to tell them to stop, and the look of disbelief that I hadn't been enjoying it was laughable. I was once asked if I was sure... ummmm yeah I'm sure, you're not churning butter mate. Cool your jets!
If he couldn't read your signs,he isn't worth shagging "
Oh I don't carry on if I'm not enjoying it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Please stop obsessing over squirting and gushing!
I have multiple messages asking me if I’m a squirter/gusher. Saying they hope I do/can after a the conversation goes well. Complete lady boner killer!
It’s just not important, it’s not the be all and end all, I have amazing orgasms either way! Surely you should be all about the orgasms whether or not I can turn them into a fountain?
If you pressure, and expect, and obsess over it, then you don’t deserve it anyway!
Get your heads out of porn land and into the person you’re pleasuring!
Rant. Over!
As you were!
P.s I’m eating cake. I’ll be fine in 5 mins.
"
So what are you trying to say?… |
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