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For the love of orgasms….guys….

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By *issYeuxBleus OP   Woman  over a year ago

My boudoir - S Wales

Please stop obsessing over squirting and gushing!

I have multiple messages asking me if I’m a squirter/gusher. Saying they hope I do/can after a the conversation goes well. Complete lady boner killer!

It’s just not important, it’s not the be all and end all, I have amazing orgasms either way! Surely you should be all about the orgasms whether or not I can turn them into a fountain?

If you pressure, and expect, and obsess over it, then you don’t deserve it anyway!

Get your heads out of porn land and into the person you’re pleasuring!

Rant. Over!

As you were!

P.s I’m eating cake. I’ll be fine in 5 mins.

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By *nobyMan  over a year ago

Dorchester


"Please stop obsessing over squirting and gushing!

I have multiple messages asking me if I’m a squirter/gusher. Saying they hope I do/can after a the conversation goes well. Complete lady boner killer!

It’s just not important, it’s not the be all and end all, I have amazing orgasms either way! Surely you should be all about the orgasms whether or not I can turn them into a fountain?

If you pressure, and expect, and obsess over it, then you don’t deserve it anyway!

Get your heads out of porn land and into the person you’re pleasuring!

Rant. Over!

As you were!

P.s I’m eating cake. I’ll be fine in 5 mins.

"

Well said!

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan  over a year ago

Aylesbury

I dont. I'm much too self centred to obsess over the bodily functions of women

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

I'm far more interested in the big O

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By *_Mr.K_xMan  over a year ago

Somewhere between Hades and Narnia

What kind of cake?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

And does it have squirty cream on it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Slow and steady wins the race

Stop fucking changing the pace

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Does it kill your wide-on in an instant?

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By *issYeuxBleus OP   Woman  over a year ago

My boudoir - S Wales

It’s chocolate and hazlenut,

It has lots of squirty cream! This slice of cake is more appealing than my bipolar vagina apparently!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Please stop obsessing over squirting and gushing!

I have multiple messages asking me if I’m a squirter/gusher. Saying they hope I do/can after a the conversation goes well. Complete lady boner killer!

It’s just not important, it’s not the be all and end all, I have amazing orgasms either way! Surely you should be all about the orgasms whether or not I can turn them into a fountain?

If you pressure, and expect, and obsess over it, then you don’t deserve it anyway!

Get your heads out of porn land and into the person you’re pleasuring!

Rant. Over!

As you were!

P.s I’m eating cake. I’ll be fine in 5 mins.

"

It’s just piss anyway innit?

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend


"Slow and steady wins the race

Stop fucking changing the pace"

If you're on top

Just don't stop

Keep on going till you have to flop

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By *iaisonseekerMan  over a year ago

Liverpool

I'm so unreconstructed, I don't care if a woman even has an orgasm

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By *affeine DuskMan  over a year ago

Caerphilly


"

It’s chocolate and hazlenut,

It has lots of squirty cream! This slice of cake is more appealing than my bipolar vagina apparently!

"

...no way that takes you 5 whole minutes to eat, I'd have that done in under 60 seconds

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By *osey WalesMan  over a year ago

Surrey


"Slow and steady wins the race

Stop fucking changing the pace"

I always win. Never come second, second is failure

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By *assycitygirlWoman  over a year ago

Cardiff

OP I am with you on this. Men do seem rather obsessed with the question. I am not a lover of it, I tell them this but it falls on mostly deaf ears.

In fact I'm of the opinion that I'd rather not do it, give me someone who can make me orgasm the "traditional" way and not the theatrical, danger of drowning squirting way please.

I've had a couple of meets where my opinion was ignored, and what then happened can only be liked to someone trying to unblock a toilet with a plunger. Except it was his fingers in my vagina!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Couldn’t agree more!

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By *_Mr.K_xMan  over a year ago

Somewhere between Hades and Narnia


"

It’s chocolate and hazlenut,

It has lots of squirty cream! This slice of cake is more appealing than my bipolar vagina apparently!

"

Noiiiiccee.... I love a good cake.... but for heavens sake, please tell me it has a flake? And in your mouth it melts and is lush to take?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"OP I am with you on this. Men do seem rather obsessed with the question. I am not a lover of it, I tell them this but it falls on mostly deaf ears.

In fact I'm of the opinion that I'd rather not do it, give me someone who can make me orgasm the "traditional" way and not the theatrical, danger of drowning squirting way please.

I've had a couple of meets where my opinion was ignored, and what then happened can only be liked to someone trying to unblock a toilet with a plunger. Except it was his fingers in my vagina!

"

Exactly! I’m not even a squirting fan but guys seem obsessed with it!

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By *issYeuxBleus OP   Woman  over a year ago

My boudoir - S Wales


"

It’s chocolate and hazlenut,

It has lots of squirty cream! This slice of cake is more appealing than my bipolar vagina apparently!

...no way that takes you 5 whole minutes to eat, I'd have that done in under 60 seconds "

It took 4.23 minutes. And now I’m going to vomit. So it was a bit pointless really! I should have wanked

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By *ooo wet tight hornyWoman  over a year ago

lancashire


"Please stop obsessing over squirting and gushing!

I have multiple messages asking me if I’m a squirter/gusher. Saying they hope I do/can after a the conversation goes well. Complete lady boner killer!

It’s just not important, it’s not the be all and end all, I have amazing orgasms either way! Surely you should be all about the orgasms whether or not I can turn them into a fountain?

If you pressure, and expect, and obsess over it, then you don’t deserve it anyway!

Get your heads out of porn land and into the person you’re pleasuring!

Rant. Over!

As you were!

P.s I’m eating cake. I’ll be fine in 5 mins.

"

Well said OP I've never had a guy make me squirt...always let them know that when they ask 'Do I squirt' I have very wet Orgasms that feel real good so not bothered if I never do ever squirt!!

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By *issYeuxBleus OP   Woman  over a year ago

My boudoir - S Wales


"

It’s chocolate and hazlenut,

It has lots of squirty cream! This slice of cake is more appealing than my bipolar vagina apparently!

Noiiiiccee.... I love a good cake.... but for heavens sake, please tell me it has a flake? And in your mouth it melts and is lush to take?"

It had a Fererro Rocher On top and a surprise one inside.

Definitely better than my vagina. I’m going to have to start popping things inside as a surprise gift every time someone goes down on me now

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By *affeine DuskMan  over a year ago

Caerphilly


"

It’s chocolate and hazlenut,

It has lots of squirty cream! This slice of cake is more appealing than my bipolar vagina apparently!

...no way that takes you 5 whole minutes to eat, I'd have that done in under 60 seconds

It took 4.23 minutes. And now I’m going to vomit. So it was a bit pointless really! I should have wanked "

... oh my goodness, cake AFTER wank!

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By *_Mr.K_xMan  over a year ago

Somewhere between Hades and Narnia

I'm not obsessed with it, I couldn't really care.. as everything else that goes with it, the chat, the flirt, the neck kisses, the breathing, the amazing sex itself should be all that matters

With that said, it was a nice 'happy accident' to find out on a recent meet that this happened lol

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By *issYeuxBleus OP   Woman  over a year ago

My boudoir - S Wales


"I'm not obsessed with it, I couldn't really care.. as everything else that goes with it, the chat, the flirt, the neck kisses, the breathing, the amazing sex itself should be all that matters

With that said, it was a nice 'happy accident' to find out on a recent meet that this happened lol "

The Bob Ross of orgasms

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By *issYeuxBleus OP   Woman  over a year ago

My boudoir - S Wales


"

It’s chocolate and hazlenut,

It has lots of squirty cream! This slice of cake is more appealing than my bipolar vagina apparently!

...no way that takes you 5 whole minutes to eat, I'd have that done in under 60 seconds

It took 4.23 minutes. And now I’m going to vomit. So it was a bit pointless really! I should have wanked

... oh my goodness, cake AFTER wank! "

I’m doing this all wrong!!!!

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By *_Mr.K_xMan  over a year ago

Somewhere between Hades and Narnia


"

It’s chocolate and hazlenut,

It has lots of squirty cream! This slice of cake is more appealing than my bipolar vagina apparently!

Noiiiiccee.... I love a good cake.... but for heavens sake, please tell me it has a flake? And in your mouth it melts and is lush to take?

It had a Fererro Rocher On top and a surprise one inside.

Definitely better than my vagina. I’m going to have to start popping things inside as a surprise gift every time someone goes down on me now "

Absolutely down for this.. that's a better surprise than squinting.

Imagine finding a kinder egg or Ferrero rocher in there lol x

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By *KG12Couple  over a year ago

Burnley


"

It’s chocolate and hazlenut,

It has lots of squirty cream! This slice of cake is more appealing than my bipolar vagina apparently!

Noiiiiccee.... I love a good cake.... but for heavens sake, please tell me it has a flake? And in your mouth it melts and is lush to take?

It had a Fererro Rocher On top and a surprise one inside.

Definitely better than my vagina. I’m going to have to start popping things inside as a surprise gift every time someone goes down on me now "

You may be faced with a barrage of requests now, advising what they want as a gift

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By *_Mr.K_xMan  over a year ago

Somewhere between Hades and Narnia

*squirting

Lol @ squinting... bloody phone

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Abso-bloody-lutely!

I can, but I prefer not to. I don't have an orgasm. It just embarrasses me and I feel out of control. The last chap to do it wouldn't bloody stop. Leave me alone!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Tl; Dr

Men, amirite?

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By *issYeuxBleus OP   Woman  over a year ago

My boudoir - S Wales


"Abso-bloody-lutely!

I can, but I prefer not to. I don't have an orgasm. It just embarrasses me and I feel out of control. The last chap to do it wouldn't bloody stop. Leave me alone! "

Yes a lady up there referred to it as a toilet plunger! It hurts!!!!!!

It’s happened to me with slower more sensual movements. I guess it’s all down to the skill and know how, as well as studying the one you’re with at the time, the level of “turned on-ness”, and connection. But the ones who obsess and “plunge” just end up causing vaginal dryness. It’s quite ironic really.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Abso-bloody-lutely!

I can, but I prefer not to. I don't have an orgasm. It just embarrasses me and I feel out of control. The last chap to do it wouldn't bloody stop. Leave me alone!

Yes a lady up there referred to it as a toilet plunger! It hurts!!!!!!

It’s happened to me with slower more sensual movements. I guess it’s all down to the skill and know how, as well as studying the one you’re with at the time, the level of “turned on-ness”, and connection. But the ones who obsess and “plunge” just end up causing vaginal dryness. It’s quite ironic really. "

I felt exactly that my toilet was being plunged. Over and over. And then shaking his arm around to show off the droplets.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Completely with the ladies on this. I think men should know that squirting is not necessarily a pleasure experience. Just make us orgasm. We'll be grateful!

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By *neofakind69Man  over a year ago

birmingham

I agree. Enjoying the whole experience is what makes it worth while. Squirting/gushing if it’s meant to happen will happen as part of the whole experience.

No need to just obsess over that. There’s plenty of other things to enjoy too

Xxx

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By *ekked JackMan  over a year ago

South Lanarkshire


"Please stop obsessing over squirting and gushing!

I have multiple messages asking me if I’m a squirter/gusher. Saying they hope I do/can after a the conversation goes well. Complete lady boner killer!

It’s just not important, it’s not the be all and end all, I have amazing orgasms either way! Surely you should be all about the orgasms whether or not I can turn them into a fountain?

If you pressure, and expect, and obsess over it, then you don’t deserve it anyway!

Get your heads out of porn land and into the person you’re pleasuring!

Rant. Over!

As you were!

P.s I’m eating cake. I’ll be fine in 5 mins.

"

I hope its a phallus shaped éclair.

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By *enrietteandSamCouple  over a year ago

Staffordshire

…5 mins!

It’s a better cake than mine

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I didn’t read the thread but I’m guessing every woman wants to squirt and I guess I’ll have to take one for the team and make this happen

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By *_Mr.K_xMan  over a year ago

Somewhere between Hades and Narnia


"I'm not obsessed with it, I couldn't really care.. as everything else that goes with it, the chat, the flirt, the neck kisses, the breathing, the amazing sex itself should be all that matters

With that said, it was a nice 'happy accident' to find out on a recent meet that this happened lol

The Bob Ross of orgasms "

"I'm gonna paint a tree.... right over there"

Random fact, I share the same birthday as Bob Ross

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By *ellinever70Woman  over a year ago

Ayrshire

If a guy is shoogling your fanny in a way you really don't like, why in the name of god wouldn't you say you don't like it

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By *issYeuxBleus OP   Woman  over a year ago

My boudoir - S Wales


"…5 mins!

It’s a better cake than mine "

It cost £4.50 for one slice, it had better be the best 5 minute cake high I’ve ever had

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By *_Mr.K_xMan  over a year ago

Somewhere between Hades and Narnia


"…5 mins!

It’s a better cake than mine

It cost £4.50 for one slice, it had better be the best 5 minute cake high I’ve ever had "

The world's most epic cake followed by the world's most epic sex seems like the absolute perfect night.. name anything better lol

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By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset

If you can finish your cake in 5 minutes then the slice wasn't big enough.

As for the other issue? I suppose you could just piss on him to make him feel better and just make some 'ooh, ooh' noises if he's starting to get irritating?

A

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

I've got half a Belgian dark chocolate cake sitting in the kitchen...Will swap for fucks and bj's..

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By *enrietteandSamCouple  over a year ago

Staffordshire


"…5 mins!

It’s a better cake than mine

It cost £4.50 for one slice, it had better be the best 5 minute cake high I’ve ever had

The world's most epic cake followed by the world's most epic sex seems like the absolute perfect night.. name anything better lol"

As long as the whole thing takes under 10 mins I’m in

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By *_Mr.K_xMan  over a year ago

Somewhere between Hades and Narnia


"I've got half a Belgian dark chocolate cake sitting in the kitchen...Will swap for fucks and bj's.. "

Dibs, yeah?

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By *_Mr.K_xMan  over a year ago

Somewhere between Hades and Narnia


"…5 mins!

It’s a better cake than mine

It cost £4.50 for one slice, it had better be the best 5 minute cake high I’ve ever had

The world's most epic cake followed by the world's most epic sex seems like the absolute perfect night.. name anything better lol

As long as the whole thing takes under 10 mins I’m in "

Make it 15? Me too

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By *issYeuxBleus OP   Woman  over a year ago

My boudoir - S Wales


"…5 mins!

It’s a better cake than mine

It cost £4.50 for one slice, it had better be the best 5 minute cake high I’ve ever had

The world's most epic cake followed by the world's most epic sex seems like the absolute perfect night.. name anything better lol

As long as the whole thing takes under 10 mins I’m in

Make it 15? Me too"

Cake eating daisy chain? Should take approximately 8 minutes. Then we can watch Star Wars in bed please?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No cake bar of galaxy though

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By *enrietteandSamCouple  over a year ago

Staffordshire


"…5 mins!

It’s a better cake than mine

It cost £4.50 for one slice, it had better be the best 5 minute cake high I’ve ever had

The world's most epic cake followed by the world's most epic sex seems like the absolute perfect night.. name anything better lol

As long as the whole thing takes under 10 mins I’m in

Make it 15? Me too

Cake eating daisy chain? Should take approximately 8 minutes. Then we can watch Star Wars in bed please? "

A new hope?

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By *_Mr.K_xMan  over a year ago

Somewhere between Hades and Narnia


"…5 mins!

It’s a better cake than mine

It cost £4.50 for one slice, it had better be the best 5 minute cake high I’ve ever had

The world's most epic cake followed by the world's most epic sex seems like the absolute perfect night.. name anything better lol

As long as the whole thing takes under 10 mins I’m in

Make it 15? Me too

Cake eating daisy chain? Should take approximately 8 minutes. Then we can watch Star Wars in bed please? "

Absolutely... which Star Wars though?? A whole different debate x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Squirtle i choose you

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By *issYeuxBleus OP   Woman  over a year ago

My boudoir - S Wales


"…5 mins!

It’s a better cake than mine

It cost £4.50 for one slice, it had better be the best 5 minute cake high I’ve ever had

The world's most epic cake followed by the world's most epic sex seems like the absolute perfect night.. name anything better lol

As long as the whole thing takes under 10 mins I’m in

Make it 15? Me too

Cake eating daisy chain? Should take approximately 8 minutes. Then we can watch Star Wars in bed please?

A new hope? "

A New Hope indeed

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Please stop obsessing over squirting and gushing!

I have multiple messages asking me if I’m a squirter/gusher. Saying they hope I do/can after a the conversation goes well. Complete lady boner killer!

It’s just not important, it’s not the be all and end all, I have amazing orgasms either way! Surely you should be all about the orgasms whether or not I can turn them into a fountain?

If you pressure, and expect, and obsess over it, then you don’t deserve it anyway!

Get your heads out of porn land and into the person you’re pleasuring!

Rant. Over!

As you were!

P.s I’m eating cake. I’ll be fine in 5 mins.

"

Surely eating a doughnut would be better

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Multiply the orgasms build them into the worlds greatest orgasmic solo singer

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend


"Multiply the orgasms build them into the worlds greatest orgasmic solo singer"
ride the wave

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Multiply the orgasms build them into the worlds greatest orgasmic solo singerride the wave "
like a surfing olympian

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend


"Multiply the orgasms build them into the worlds greatest orgasmic solo singerride the wave like a surfing olympian "

Happy days

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Gushing for me isn’t even an orgasm. It’s just the result of too much pressure in that area.

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By *dfabMan  over a year ago

Dunboyne


"Please stop obsessing over squirting and gushing!

I have multiple messages asking me if I’m a squirter/gusher. Saying they hope I do/can after a the conversation goes well. Complete lady boner killer!

It’s just not important, it’s not the be all and end all, I have amazing orgasms either way! Surely you should be all about the orgasms whether or not I can turn them into a fountain?

If you pressure, and expect, and obsess over it, then you don’t deserve it anyway!

Get your heads out of porn land and into the person you’re pleasuring!

Rant. Over!

As you were!

P.s I’m eating cake. I’ll be fine in 5 mins.

"

Completely agree

Orgasm is the ideal but mutual enjoyment is the goal. If someone gets wet during the process, enjoy that too but the whole reason for being there is to enjoy each other as much as you can

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"OP I am with you on this. Men do seem rather obsessed with the question. I am not a lover of it, I tell them this but it falls on mostly deaf ears.

In fact I'm of the opinion that I'd rather not do it, give me someone who can make me orgasm the "traditional" way and not the theatrical, danger of drowning squirting way please.

I've had a couple of meets where my opinion was ignored, and what then happened can only be liked to someone trying to unblock a toilet with a plunger. Except it was his fingers in my vagina!

"

I’m guessing the obsession stems from what is popular in porn? A bit like cumming in women’s faces. Men seem obsessed with that too.

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By *rFunBoyMan  over a year ago

Longridge

Saves on squirty cream though..

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By *assycitygirlWoman  over a year ago

Cardiff


"If a guy is shoogling your fanny in a way you really don't like, why in the name of god wouldn't you say you don't like it "

Shoogling, excellent word. I have have spoken up to tell them to stop, and the look of disbelief that I hadn't been enjoying it was laughable. I was once asked if I was sure... ummmm yeah I'm sure, you're not churning butter mate. Cool your jets!

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By *dfabMan  over a year ago

Dunboyne


"If a guy is shoogling your fanny in a way you really don't like, why in the name of god wouldn't you say you don't like it

Shoogling, excellent word. I have have spoken up to tell them to stop, and the look of disbelief that I hadn't been enjoying it was laughable. I was once asked if I was sure... ummmm yeah I'm sure, you're not churning butter mate. Cool your jets! "

If he couldn't read your signs,he isn't worth shagging

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Moist.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Mmmmmm. Chocolate cake with nuts.and cream.. Ice cream I hope

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I dont. I'm much too self centred to obsess over the bodily functions of women"

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By *assycitygirlWoman  over a year ago

Cardiff


"If a guy is shoogling your fanny in a way you really don't like, why in the name of god wouldn't you say you don't like it

Shoogling, excellent word. I have have spoken up to tell them to stop, and the look of disbelief that I hadn't been enjoying it was laughable. I was once asked if I was sure... ummmm yeah I'm sure, you're not churning butter mate. Cool your jets!

If he couldn't read your signs,he isn't worth shagging "

Oh I don't carry on if I'm not enjoying it.

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan  over a year ago

Gloucestershire

I’m gushing over the thought of the cake

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By *heVonMatterhornsCouple  over a year ago

Lincoln

Don't blame us men for you not squirting! Everyone knows all women can, so it must be you just not relaxing properly during the Cervix-Bashing Finger Blaster 9000

LvM

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Please stop obsessing over squirting and gushing!

I have multiple messages asking me if I’m a squirter/gusher. Saying they hope I do/can after a the conversation goes well. Complete lady boner killer!

It’s just not important, it’s not the be all and end all, I have amazing orgasms either way! Surely you should be all about the orgasms whether or not I can turn them into a fountain?

If you pressure, and expect, and obsess over it, then you don’t deserve it anyway!

Get your heads out of porn land and into the person you’re pleasuring!

Rant. Over!

As you were!

P.s I’m eating cake. I’ll be fine in 5 mins.

"

So what are you trying to say?…

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By *annaBeStrongMan  over a year ago

w

I’ll be interested in whatever I want thanks

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