I sometimes wonder?
I try to make it clear on my profile that I have very limited time to meet as Linda.
I get so many messages asking to meet or asking when I will be able to travel to Glasgow, London, Birmingham etc. I would love to be able to go but I work full time and have a private life with an elderly father.
I would say I decline more than ninety per cent of the invitations.
I feel guilty as this is a swinging site. But this does keep me connected.
Am I on the right site?
Hmmm I am starting to sound sorry for myself now, and I don’t mean to do that .. should I kick my arse out of here or just give myself a kick up the arse? |
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Don't worry about it. There is no specific way of how swingers and members of Fab should use the site.
Meet as often or as little as you like, or even just chat on the forums.
It's up to you what you do, and if anyone has an issue with that then that is 'their' problem. |
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Your profile is clear.
You don't owe anyone anything.
Use the site as you see fit. Everyone does their own thing. Why shouldn't you?
If you're as up front in your chats about when, how and as who you are meeting, then you're probably a lot more straightforward than most  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Oh sweetie, bad night, huh?
I want you to know that Linda exists for your pleasure and not anyone elses. She is the person you can transform into to explore parts of yourself that you normally never could, and that is a special gift that you can give yourself.
Linda isnt there for anyone else, she is there for you. You dont owe it to anyone to become Linda for their pleasure, and being on this site does not change that one jot.
Even if you never played with anyone, Linda would still be welcome here. Absolutely. Unconditionally. This is a space where Linda is free to exist without any expectations on her, and when and if she wants to play, that is for her to enjoy and explore in her own time with the people she chooses, how she chooses.
It is not a bad thing to have a life outside of fab and there is no reason for you to feel guilty for not having much time to meet. Some people get a lot of enjoyment from spending lots of time on fab, for other people, its just the sprinkles on an otherwise full life. Wherever you fall on that spectrum is totally ok. Fab is here for you - you dont owe it anything.
I would like to give you a hug and let you know that you are totally ok! You dont have to do better. You are doing just fine. Please dont kick yourself up the arse, instead, give youself a hug, a soak in the bath (with extra bubbles) and a big bowlful of Ben and Jerrys.
Hold yourself tenderly. Let love flow from your heart in a warm blanket around you, and know that you are doing just fine.
Fay 
PS. Your profile is beautiful  |
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"Don't worry about it. There is no specific way of how swingers and members of Fab should use the site.
Meet as often or as little as you like, or even just chat on the forums.
It's up to you what you do, and if anyone has an issue with that then that is 'their' problem. "
I know I should know this… I just had a moment!
But thank you for caring to respond xxx |
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"No, you make it clear on your profile you can't always meet, use the site however you want do your own thing and enjoy yourself, never feel guilty for doing that."
Yea thank you xxx
I know I should know this … just sometimes I wish I could contribute more |
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"Oh sweetie, bad night, huh?
I want you to know that Linda exists for your pleasure and not anyone elses. She is the person you can transform into to explore parts of yourself that you normally never could, and that is a special gift that you can give yourself.
Linda isnt there for anyone else, she is there for you. You dont owe it to anyone to become Linda for their pleasure, and being on this site does not change that one jot.
Even if you never played with anyone, Linda would still be welcome here. Absolutely. Unconditionally. This is a space where Linda is free to exist without any expectations on her, and when and if she wants to play, that is for her to enjoy and explore in her own time with the people she chooses, how she chooses.
It is not a bad thing to have a life outside of fab and there is no reason for you to feel guilty for not having much time to meet. Some people get a lot of enjoyment from spending lots of time on fab, for other people, its just the sprinkles on an otherwise full life. Wherever you fall on that spectrum is totally ok. Fab is here for you - you dont owe it anything.
I would like to give you a hug and let you know that you are totally ok! You dont have to do better. You are doing just fine. Please dont kick yourself up the arse, instead, give youself a hug, a soak in the bath (with extra bubbles) and a big bowlful of Ben and Jerrys.
Hold yourself tenderly. Let love flow from your heart in a warm blanket around you, and know that you are doing just fine.
Fay
PS. Your profile is beautiful "
That is so beautiful!
How refreshing that someone with such empathy should express themselves so eloquently!
Thank you . I feel guilty now cos I kind of know all this and really I only had a wobble because I had a lot of requests that I could not fulfil.
I bet there are a lot of people on fab who leave me well behind in that department though!
But most of all, thank you for being so so so considerate xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Oh sweetie, bad night, huh?
I want you to know that Linda exists for your pleasure and not anyone elses. She is the person you can transform into to explore parts of yourself that you normally never could, and that is a special gift that you can give yourself.
Linda isnt there for anyone else, she is there for you. You dont owe it to anyone to become Linda for their pleasure, and being on this site does not change that one jot.
Even if you never played with anyone, Linda would still be welcome here. Absolutely. Unconditionally. This is a space where Linda is free to exist without any expectations on her, and when and if she wants to play, that is for her to enjoy and explore in her own time with the people she chooses, how she chooses.
It is not a bad thing to have a life outside of fab and there is no reason for you to feel guilty for not having much time to meet. Some people get a lot of enjoyment from spending lots of time on fab, for other people, its just the sprinkles on an otherwise full life. Wherever you fall on that spectrum is totally ok. Fab is here for you - you dont owe it anything.
I would like to give you a hug and let you know that you are totally ok! You dont have to do better. You are doing just fine. Please dont kick yourself up the arse, instead, give youself a hug, a soak in the bath (with extra bubbles) and a big bowlful of Ben and Jerrys.
Hold yourself tenderly. Let love flow from your heart in a warm blanket around you, and know that you are doing just fine.
Fay
PS. Your profile is beautiful
That is so beautiful!
How refreshing that someone with such empathy should express themselves so eloquently!
Thank you . I feel guilty now cos I kind of know all this and really I only had a wobble because I had a lot of requests that I could not fulfil.
I bet there are a lot of people on fab who leave me well behind in that department though!
But most of all, thank you for being so so so considerate xxx"
Youre allowed to have a wobble! We all have wobbles sometimes, even when we really do know the truth. We all need people to remind us that we are doing ok from time to time... Ive got your back buddy! 
Goodnight! Sleep well!
Fay |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
You are certainly not a fraud x it's nice to see you starting a thread like that. Don't be silly and do as you like to do on here. Well done to you for being so thoughtful x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I am unfortunately aftee reading this, singing looking out for Linda by Hue and Cry.
They did a great acoustic version once but I never got hold of a copy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I'm not meeting at all right now and make that clear on my profile, it doesn't make anyone a fraud. If people choose to ignore the profile and attempt to waste their own time, it's not my problem. You're fab experience is your own, don't worry about what anyone else thinks. |
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"Don't worry about it. There is no specific way of how swingers and members of Fab should use the site.
Meet as often or as little as you like, or even just chat on the forums.
It's up to you what you do, and if anyone has an issue with that then that is 'their' problem.
I know I should know this… I just had a moment!
But thank you for caring to respond xxx"
That's ok. We all have moments.
Take care of yourself. |
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"Oh sweetie, bad night, huh?
I want you to know that Linda exists for your pleasure and not anyone elses. She is the person you can transform into to explore parts of yourself that you normally never could, and that is a special gift that you can give yourself.
Linda isnt there for anyone else, she is there for you. You dont owe it to anyone to become Linda for their pleasure, and being on this site does not change that one jot.
Even if you never played with anyone, Linda would still be welcome here. Absolutely. Unconditionally. This is a space where Linda is free to exist without any expectations on her, and when and if she wants to play, that is for her to enjoy and explore in her own time with the people she chooses, how she chooses.
It is not a bad thing to have a life outside of fab and there is no reason for you to feel guilty for not having much time to meet. Some people get a lot of enjoyment from spending lots of time on fab, for other people, its just the sprinkles on an otherwise full life. Wherever you fall on that spectrum is totally ok. Fab is here for you - you dont owe it anything.
I would like to give you a hug and let you know that you are totally ok! You dont have to do better. You are doing just fine. Please dont kick yourself up the arse, instead, give youself a hug, a soak in the bath (with extra bubbles) and a big bowlful of Ben and Jerrys.
Hold yourself tenderly. Let love flow from your heart in a warm blanket around you, and know that you are doing just fine.
Fay
PS. Your profile is beautiful "
This is a lovely post, Fay. Well said! |
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I only have so many times I can dress in a month or even a year. It’s not an easy job, shave whole body that includes arm hair, makeup and get a wig to look right. Often I just feel lazy and can’t be bothered.
Now imagine you’ve done all that and they don’t turn up 
Most of the time just here for the forums and chatting with a few friends I’ve made here. I’m also on a runner’s forum but I very rarely run these days due to my health issues. But I do enjoy the banter on that forum.
So do as you do, bollocks to what others think.  |
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We all have lives and most squeeze this life in when we can
The lucky few are close proximity to a decent club or regular event or don’t work full time and make this a regular ‘hobby’
So definitely don’t beat yourself up!
Keep drinking the wine, enjoy what you can when you can and if people can’t read your profile and appreciate it’s likely to be a no that’s their issue, not yours
Dip in, dip out, keep it exciting  |
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Some (not all) men, seen to think that we're like free sex workers... And make demands because we appeal to a certain kink/fetish they have. Like this is our full time job and we don't have families, lives, commitments... Xx |
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