FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do you connect with people or you just fuck !
Do you connect with people or you just fuck !
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Lately I am questioning my presents on FABS more then ever .
Why am I on here ?
But .....
Lately is more of ,
Do you connect with people
Or
It's just fucking.
So u don't care about them ??.
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Horses for courses - different people are looking for radically different things.
I care about the people I fuck. I have nothing but love for the people I've met and there's been enough of a connection with each of them for me to want to have sex with them.
I'm not in love with any of them and wouldn't want more than FWB/FB arrangements with any of them.
For me on here it's been important to know exactly what I want and to hold out for people who want the same thing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m looking for friendship and connection, obviously sex would be great if with the right person. I’m on fab as a full relationship seems like a distant dream for me due to circumstances at home (I am single but care for a disabled child), and in hoping a fwb might be easier to find on this site. I’ve certainly made friends xx |
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No connection no sex - whats the point - you have to care that the other person is having a good time - i see so many people refer to this as a sex site - it’s not - its a swingers site - full of people with no clue what swinging is and have just come here - because it’s free - you can see pics of boobs and bums and send your knob to anyone who hasnt blocked you. Which is why the proper swingers get pissed off and leave. Stopping now before I disturb my oasis of calm xx  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I like a connection, I did a meet once that didn't really have any connection, we ended up having sex but it was all a little awkward, that won't be happening again...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you choose to have sex with someone wouldn't a connection be a prerequisite? Even if you chat and speak to someone that day and meet up for sex that night, you still would've chatted for a bit and found each other attractive enough to fuck. I suppose how much of a connection do you need is another question. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
I'm going to join the masses and say I need connection. That doesn't mean I want to run off into the sunset with them but it does mean I need to have at least friendship before I'm sexually attracted to them. |
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"I'm going to join the masses and say I need connection. That doesn't mean I want to run off into the sunset with them but it does mean I need to have at least friendship before I'm sexually attracted to them."
Tries to start a friendship with _eli  |
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Both, situation dependent. Generally I like to get an insight into people's heads and nature. I find souls and personality sexy. My attraction generally grows (or wanes) the more I get to know a person. I can go from staring a conversation from not being overly interested to wanting to fuck the parts off them by the end of the conversation. However the attraction is alway verbal, a smile, the eye contact can say a lot about a person.
However there's a time and a place (generally clubs/parties) where I'm just in that mood and everyone is just hungry for each other. I'm a massive fan of a good orgy and this is a classic example of the sort of moments I feel this. Its hot and of the moment. But it's something I can feel one on one too. Sometimes it's nice to just have that unexpected hot moment with someone and both walk away afterwards without knowing anything about each other. Just an uncomplicated intense stollen moment and a great memory. |
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I don't care about them in the same way as I care about my family and close friends but I respect and like them, I consider them my equal as a human being. I think it's wise not to expect too much from the people we meet though, I see an awful lot of emotional need and I think this is the wrong place to look for it |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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"I'm going to join the masses and say I need connection. That doesn't mean I want to run off into the sunset with them but it does mean I need to have at least friendship before I'm sexually attracted to them.
Tries to start a friendship with _eli "
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thanks for many replies
I must admit I connected with many people on here
But  I did have some ( fucks to ) .
We clearly all seeking other thinks
That's beauty of this place I guess .
I am at the point where I don't enjoy sex if I don't have connection ??.
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"There's a reason the acronym is FWB rather than BWF.
Friendship before benefits.
Absolutely this. Benefits aren't as important as friendship."
Depends what the benefit is surely?
I’d hang out with BoJo if he paid me a few million a month  |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"There's a reason the acronym is FWB rather than BWF.
Friendship before benefits.
Absolutely this. Benefits aren't as important as friendship.
Depends what the benefit is surely?
I’d hang out with BoJo if he paid me a few million a month "
I'd hang out with him for a couple of thousand a month. I spent a hell of a lot of time hanging out with dickheads, I'm really good at ignoring people. |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"There's a reason the acronym is FWB rather than BWF.
Friendship before benefits.
Absolutely this. Benefits aren't as important as friendship.
Depends what the benefit is surely?
I’d hang out with BoJo if he paid me a few million a month
I'd hang out with him for a couple of thousand a month. I spent a hell of a lot of time hanging out with dickheads, I'm really good at ignoring people."
Or bowling them over in a rush to escape…..  |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"There's a reason the acronym is FWB rather than BWF.
Friendship before benefits.
Absolutely this. Benefits aren't as important as friendship.
Depends what the benefit is surely?
I’d hang out with BoJo if he paid me a few million a month
I'd hang out with him for a couple of thousand a month. I spent a hell of a lot of time hanging out with dickheads, I'm really good at ignoring people.
Or bowling them over in a rush to escape….. "
Huh? Missed that. TMontana1 is behind you  |
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By *ensualMan
over a year ago
Sutton |
Different people have different gatekeeping to sex. I get puzzled by those in the "needing connection crowd" who are rude about those that don't need connection, or act morally superior because they want connection. I have seen plenty of spontaneous sex situations ranging from 1 on 1 to gang bangs and bukkakes. Everyone was happy and had a valid experience.
We are all adults and if people like NSA or DDF that choice should not be disrespected. In my view it is just a personal choice no different to height, age, or gender preferences. |
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"Lately I am questioning my presents on FABS more then ever .
Why am I on here ?
But .....
Lately is more of ,
Do you connect with people
Or
It's just fucking.
So u don't care about them ??.
"
I wouldn’t fuck anyone I didn’t connect with
That’s  just me  |
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I'm not really are you free in a 20 mins or who wants to come round at 3am status guy. So definitely a connection has to be made first.
But I'm also questioning my time here. I took a break. I've come back. There's lots of arguments, ridiculous points of view, rounding on opinions etc. |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
I prefer to have a connection I've no interest in meeting someone just to scratch an itch they have I find the sex is usually pretty average and crap when that happens. I've done it before and it's always left me feeling meh after.
So now I won't unless I actually like the person. It doesn't mean there has to be repeat meets or anything but it does mean we can chat and have a bit of craic as well as sex.
My preference tho is a fwb and I've been lucky have have an amazing friend that I do meet regularly off here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Connect on a personality level yes but not anything deeper than that. Make me laugh and get your penis out (preferably not at the same time)."
id like to use you like an ipad docking station |
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I'll jump on the bandwagon & say I need to like being in the company of people I have sex with.
That doesn't mean I haven't jumped the bones of the odd fine specimen now & then. I can certainly get that fanny flutter from gazing at a beautiful stranger.
But chatting, giggling and that effortless camaraderie with like minded souls is what it's all about for me.
Sadly, it's not that easy to find on here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you choose to have sex with someone wouldn't a connection be a prerequisite? Even if you chat and speak to someone that day and meet up for sex that night, you still would've chatted for a bit and found each other attractive enough to fuck. I suppose how much of a connection do you need is another question."
I can't meet someone that day and trust them enough for sex that evening. Connection takes time to grow - at least for me it does. |
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"Lately I am questioning my presents on FABS more then ever .
Why am I on here ?
But .....
Lately is more of ,
Do you connect with people
Or
It's just fucking.
So u don't care about them ??.
"
We need to connect to fully enjoy the experience otherwise its just cold sex, hence at least chat and a cozy social first. Always hoping for a developing and lasting naughty friendship so connection is a must... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you choose to have sex with someone wouldn't a connection be a prerequisite? Even if you chat and speak to someone that day and meet up for sex that night, you still would've chatted for a bit and found each other attractive enough to fuck. I suppose how much of a connection do you need is another question.
I can't meet someone that day and trust them enough for sex that evening. Connection takes time to grow - at least for me it does. "
Ahhh that's fair enough, trust does play a big part. I guess it depends on how everyone is wired differently. Some need that trust to know someone for a while, whereas others can find it a thrill to have sex with someone they just spoke to |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you choose to have sex with someone wouldn't a connection be a prerequisite? Even if you chat and speak to someone that day and meet up for sex that night, you still would've chatted for a bit and found each other attractive enough to fuck. I suppose how much of a connection do you need is another question.
I can't meet someone that day and trust them enough for sex that evening. Connection takes time to grow - at least for me it does.
Ahhh that's fair enough, trust does play a big part. I guess it depends on how everyone is wired differently. Some need that trust to know someone for a while, whereas others can find it a thrill to have sex with someone they just spoke to"
I tend to have kinky sex. I need some trust for that. I personally don't get a thrill from sex with strangers. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you choose to have sex with someone wouldn't a connection be a prerequisite? Even if you chat and speak to someone that day and meet up for sex that night, you still would've chatted for a bit and found each other attractive enough to fuck. I suppose how much of a connection do you need is another question.
I can't meet someone that day and trust them enough for sex that evening. Connection takes time to grow - at least for me it does.
Ahhh that's fair enough, trust does play a big part. I guess it depends on how everyone is wired differently. Some need that trust to know someone for a while, whereas others can find it a thrill to have sex with someone they just spoke to
I tend to have kinky sex. I need some trust for that. I personally don't get a thrill from sex with strangers."
If involving kink the yes there needs to be trust and a bond |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't try and establish a connection but if it happens I don't run away from it
I don't particularly like men but I enjoy having sex with them
However with women I adore building a connection and getting to know them |
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"Lately I am questioning my presents on FABS more then ever .
Why am I on here ?
But .....
Lately is more of ,
Do you connect with people
Or
It's just fucking.
So u don't care about them ??.
"
Everyone's different. We've met people on here and made good long lasting friendship's. They're people we care about. We've also met people, had a great fuck and then never seen nor heard from them again.
It's probably different for couples, even ones who sometimes play separately though. I imagine it's a different ball game if you're actually single. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you choose to have sex with someone wouldn't a connection be a prerequisite? Even if you chat and speak to someone that day and meet up for sex that night, you still would've chatted for a bit and found each other attractive enough to fuck. I suppose how much of a connection do you need is another question.
I can't meet someone that day and trust them enough for sex that evening. Connection takes time to grow - at least for me it does.
Ahhh that's fair enough, trust does play a big part. I guess it depends on how everyone is wired differently. Some need that trust to know someone for a while, whereas others can find it a thrill to have sex with someone they just spoke to
I tend to have kinky sex. I need some trust for that. I personally don't get a thrill from sex with strangers."
That's a great point! My sex isn't that kinky so probably explans why I didn't think of that  |
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juts mostly sex with the required chit chat to just get along and not have awkwardness . I am here for enjoying sexual encounters with others ,, if its repeat meets then just by common logic you will connect a touch more as you meet more ...
though I have found that 90% of my meets ever on fab have been one offs ...as a trans woman I know very well I am mostly a tick box for other people anyway .so it works both ways with me , |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you choose to have sex with someone wouldn't a connection be a prerequisite? Even if you chat and speak to someone that day and meet up for sex that night, you still would've chatted for a bit and found each other attractive enough to fuck. I suppose how much of a connection do you need is another question.
I can't meet someone that day and trust them enough for sex that evening. Connection takes time to grow - at least for me it does.
Ahhh that's fair enough, trust does play a big part. I guess it depends on how everyone is wired differently. Some need that trust to know someone for a while, whereas others can find it a thrill to have sex with someone they just spoke to
I tend to have kinky sex. I need some trust for that. I personally don't get a thrill from sex with strangers.
That's a great point! My sex isn't that kinky so probably explans why I didn't think of that "
Some people have kinky sex with no connection - everyone is different and I don't judge. I've been there and it made me a wreck so I won't do it again. |
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