FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Dadbod depression
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"Is there a reason you can’t do something about it if you’re not happy? Diet/exercise/gym? " I struggle to remain consistent | |||
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"Is there a reason you can’t do something about it if you’re not happy? Diet/exercise/gym? I struggle to remain consistent " I'm the same. I've lost lots of weight in the past then something happened to trigger the carb cravings. I find that when my stomach is settled, and I'm not tired I don't want to eat all the time. You could try talking therapy. Your GP should have some information on that. | |||
"I hate looking this way I feel 2nd class I can’t even walk around the house without a T-shirt on " it must be horrible to feel like that. We can't see what you look like but I'm guessing you're your own worst critic. Could you fit a short walk into your day? It might help you feel more positive. | |||
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"This will sound harsh but do something about it then. Complaining to a bunch of strangers on the internet will do fuck all. Don't over complicate things. Most people know what food is utter shite and what they shouldn't be eating. So cut back on the shite. You don't need a gym membership. It's only 10am on a Saturday morning. If you can, put your phone down and get out for a walk. Now. When you have time, look at body weight work puts on YouTube....nothing complicated, nothing fancy, no equipment required. And if anybody slags you off or comments on your body tell them to fucking do one." I would have been a bit more diplomatic but this is the best way to look at it. Only you can change it. Don’t start Monday, start immediately. There’s loads of information online for diets/meal plans and workouts. I have a dad bod and I’m happy with how I look but I still spend about 9 hours a week in the gym. | |||
"Unrelated to your post op but I love the Charente area. It's beautiful " My mother in law lives near there and I was going to say does walking help? | |||
"Is there a reason you can’t do something about it if you’re not happy? Diet/exercise/gym? I struggle to remain consistent " Yeah I get that. It’s mindset. I know I’ll Feel better if I go to the gym etc but it’s the motivation to get yourself there. | |||
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"This will sound harsh but do something about it then. Complaining to a bunch of strangers on the internet will do fuck all. Don't over complicate things. Most people know what food is utter shite and what they shouldn't be eating. So cut back on the shite. You don't need a gym membership. It's only 10am on a Saturday morning. If you can, put your phone down and get out for a walk. Now. When you have time, look at body weight work puts on YouTube....nothing complicated, nothing fancy, no equipment required. And if anybody slags you off or comments on your body tell them to fucking do one. I would have been a bit more diplomatic but this is the best way to look at it. Only you can change it. Don’t start Monday, start immediately. There’s loads of information online for diets/meal plans and workouts. I have a dad bod and I’m happy with how I look but I still spend about 9 hours a week in the gym." I'll start a thread on how to improve my diplomacy | |||
"Only you have the power to change that. Either change the body, or change the mentality. " This it's a slow process but commitment will see you through. I would also suggest stepping away from the scene until you feel better about yourself, this place isn't great for low self esteem. | |||
"Just think fuck it. If folk don't like your body that's their issue not yours. " He doesn't like his body though. That's the issue. | |||
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"Just think fuck it. If folk don't like your body that's their issue not yours. He doesn't like his body though. That's the issue." Exactly this. If you don’t like it it doesn’t matter what other people think. | |||
"This will sound harsh but do something about it then. Complaining to a bunch of strangers on the internet will do fuck all. Don't over complicate things. Most people know what food is utter shite and what they shouldn't be eating. So cut back on the shite. You don't need a gym membership. It's only 10am on a Saturday morning. If you can, put your phone down and get out for a walk. Now. When you have time, look at body weight work puts on YouTube....nothing complicated, nothing fancy, no equipment required. And if anybody slags you off or comments on your body tell them to fucking do one. I would have been a bit more diplomatic but this is the best way to look at it. Only you can change it. Don’t start Monday, start immediately. There’s loads of information online for diets/meal plans and workouts. I have a dad bod and I’m happy with how I look but I still spend about 9 hours a week in the gym. I'll start a thread on how to improve my diplomacy " Less swearing and more emojis could be a start | |||
"Unrelated to your post op but I love the Charente area. It's beautiful My mother in law lives near there and I was going to say does walking help? " During lockdown number 1, I walked round all of Derby's Outer Ringroad, not all in one day of course, but yes, it will help if you need to feel active, and it helps to burn off a few calories | |||
"This will sound harsh but do something about it then. Complaining to a bunch of strangers on the internet will do fuck all. Don't over complicate things. Most people know what food is utter shite and what they shouldn't be eating. So cut back on the shite. You don't need a gym membership. It's only 10am on a Saturday morning. If you can, put your phone down and get out for a walk. Now. When you have time, look at body weight work puts on YouTube....nothing complicated, nothing fancy, no equipment required. And if anybody slags you off or comments on your body tell them to fucking do one." This is the best advice you could get in my opinion. A kick up the arse, encouragement and a bit of advice as well. | |||
"This will sound harsh but do something about it then. Complaining to a bunch of strangers on the internet will do fuck all. Don't over complicate things. Most people know what food is utter shite and what they shouldn't be eating. So cut back on the shite. You don't need a gym membership. It's only 10am on a Saturday morning. If you can, put your phone down and get out for a walk. Now. When you have time, look at body weight work puts on YouTube....nothing complicated, nothing fancy, no equipment required. And if anybody slags you off or comments on your body tell them to fucking do one. This is the best advice you could get in my opinion. A kick up the arse, encouragement and a bit of advice as well. " Need to channel my inner Obama though and work on the diplomacy | |||
"I hate looking this way I feel 2nd class I can’t even walk around the house without a T-shirt on " Do you want to change? I can only presume the fact that you're posting this, that there's an aspiration to change. If you do want to change, take things slowly, reduce the calories (alcohol, snacks in between meals, fatty foods) and increase the excercise. Walk instead of driving (when you can etc.). In fact, walking is great for burning calories, but it's up to you. | |||
"This will sound harsh but do something about it then. Complaining to a bunch of strangers on the internet will do fuck all. Don't over complicate things. Most people know what food is utter shite and what they shouldn't be eating. So cut back on the shite. You don't need a gym membership. It's only 10am on a Saturday morning. If you can, put your phone down and get out for a walk. Now. When you have time, look at body weight work puts on YouTube....nothing complicated, nothing fancy, no equipment required. And if anybody slags you off or comments on your body tell them to fucking do one. This is the best advice you could get in my opinion. A kick up the arse, encouragement and a bit of advice as well. Need to channel my inner Obama though and work on the diplomacy " Just seen you’re from Glasgow….it’s exactly the sort of diplomatic language expected from our Scottish friends. Brutal and honest | |||
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"Is there a reason you can’t do something about it if you’re not happy? Diet/exercise/gym? I struggle to remain consistent " Why do you think it is so hard for you to remain consistent? Is it because you don't see results fast enough? Is it because you get bored of working out after a while? The truth is that every single problem has a solution! The only question is...do you want to change or not? | |||
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"This will sound harsh but do something about it then. Complaining to a bunch of strangers on the internet will do fuck all. Don't over complicate things. Most people know what food is utter shite and what they shouldn't be eating. So cut back on the shite. You don't need a gym membership. It's only 10am on a Saturday morning. If you can, put your phone down and get out for a walk. Now. When you have time, look at body weight work puts on YouTube....nothing complicated, nothing fancy, no equipment required. And if anybody slags you off or comments on your body tell them to fucking do one. This is the best advice you could get in my opinion. A kick up the arse, encouragement and a bit of advice as well. Need to channel my inner Obama though and work on the diplomacy " Nah, it's what these forums need. A bit of non fluffy, straight forward opinion that's not prefaced or post faced with "Just my opinion" or "each to their own". Frank | |||
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"....and when you do anything that I've suggested and feel better after it, focus on that feeling. The exhilaration after a good long walk, not feeling bloated after eating crap, the sweaty buzz after a good work out. It's difficult but try to dissociate the weight loss part from the whole process. It's a by product of looking after yourself." I love this. | |||
"I hate looking this way I feel 2nd class I can’t even walk around the house without a T-shirt on " | |||
"I hate looking this way I feel 2nd class I can’t even walk around the house without a T-shirt on " So what’s the plan then to change it? | |||
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"Dude, I promise you, I was in exactly the same position. You’re welcome to message me if you like. The hardest step to take is the first one. I’ve changed….and in turn….saved my life. " This is what it's all about. Bugger all to do with how you actually look in the t-shirt. Everything to do with how you feel. I exercise most days now and try to watch what I eat because I want to be running around after my grandkids when I'm in my 70s and nowhere near a nursing home. Of course, certain factors will be out with my control. But I think we need to exert some control in the areas that we can. | |||
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"I hear ya. I've put on loads of weight recently and can't do full length mirrors and struggle in the shower coz I can see myself (well, not my feet coz my belly is in the way)" I thought you weren't eating anything, I would have thought you're wasting away? No cinnamon buns for you then lady!.. | |||
"I hate looking this way I feel 2nd class I can’t even walk around the house without a T-shirt on " You are young enough for your body to respond well to gentle exercise. If you hate the gym as I do, bike, throw a few weights around at home. Eat less crap. It can be done. | |||
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"Unrelated to your post op but I love the Charente area. It's beautiful " Yes it’s beautiful | |||
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"Hi all Thanks for your replies I was walking 10km a day until and it kept the fat down but I’ve had a verruca for 4 months, it’s really hard to get rid of. And has stopped me walking. I don’t have a great relationship with food. There’s so much I don’t like, but I like anything sweet. My weight is currently 80kg I’ll drop down to about 72kg then I’ll Rajesh it all back. I want to be about 67kg" i dont think 80kg is massivly heavy for 5ft 6 in my opinion but its your opinion that counts do what you have to do | |||
"We put weight on through the pandemic and have started the Fast 800 way of eating. 3 weeks and 2 stone dropped already. That and walking is the key for us, exercise alone didn't do a thing other than getting fitter" What's the Fast800 way? | |||
"I hate looking this way I feel 2nd class I can’t even walk around the house without a T-shirt on You are young enough for your body to respond well to gentle exercise. If you hate the gym as I do, bike, throw a few weights around at home. Eat less crap. It can be done." This, I started doing a bit of lifting at home, with nothing but a couple of dumbbells. I’m not always in the mood for it but you can easily put some music on or a bit of rubbish tv and pump out some curls, some squats and push-ups. You’d be surprised what gaining even a little muscle will do for your metabolism. | |||
"We put weight on through the pandemic and have started the Fast 800 way of eating. 3 weeks and 2 stone dropped already. That and walking is the key for us, exercise alone didn't do a thing other than getting fitter What's the Fast800 way?" Time restricted eating, low carbs, high fat and protein. 800 is the calories you do it for 5-12 weeks. Sounds hard, but the food is great and the protein and veg are filling. Losing weight with weekend fry ups can't be bad | |||
"Hi all Thanks for your replies I was walking 10km a day until and it kept the fat down but I’ve had a verruca for 4 months, it’s really hard to get rid of. And has stopped me walking. I don’t have a great relationship with food. There’s so much I don’t like, but I like anything sweet. My weight is currently 80kg I’ll drop down to about 72kg then I’ll Rajesh it all back. I want to be about 67kg" "Rajesh it back" lol - "to Rajesh" new verb. Gonna use that. So, 13 kg weight loss target. Eminently do-able*. That's the good news. The bad news. You are what you eat. You gotta cut out all the sweet stuff: fizzy drinks, chocolate, cakes, ice cream, crisps etc. All gotta go. Replace with fruit, yoghurt, water or squash etc. Walking is brilliant for weight loss, but if you can't get out then can you get a static bike, or even a real bike? Daily cardio is essential for weight loss and well-being. Get yourself some resistance bands and start working out at home. Nothing too complicated to start, just a whole body workout two or three times a week. Your BMI is 28.3, so you're NOT obese. You just need to work at it a bit. Find the will to make the changes, and you won't look back. Honestly, it's worth it. * "That's easy for you to say", I hear you grumble. It is. I was a pizza gulping, cake chomping, choc munching, 2 litres of Coca Cola a day slurping bloke. It gave me blocked arteries and took me to the brink of a heart attack at just 47. I lost nearly 40 kilos, so you can easy do 13 kilos. I totally changed my diet, walked 6 miles or more most days, got fitter ( been a weights user since my teens, but it's no good with a shitty diet. You're just making the flab firmer ). I'm 51 now, 87 kilos, but feel fitter now than I did as a whippet lean 76 kilo 20 year old. You can do it. You just got to make a start. | |||
"I hate looking this way I feel 2nd class I can’t even walk around the house without a T-shirt on " I know how you feel. It’s so easy for others to say “well you just need to…”. It’s never that simple. What really helped me was joining a couch to 5k running group. I’m not a social person by nature, but seeing so many people just like me that were just committed to being healthier was really empowering. Getting out the door was half the battle. | |||
"I hate looking this way I feel 2nd class I can’t even walk around the house without a T-shirt on " Completely feel you. Mood and mindset can really make a difference. We are our own worst critics and see our bodies differently to those around us. I hit a major low, lost all control of my weight, excerise ect over lockdown due to a number of factors. However got some support, worked on my mindset and went back to basics and learnt about food, nutrition and what my body needs. I'm now 3.5 stone down and slowly increasing my fitness. Walks and swimming really have helped. It's not easy but you can do it if you want too and that is the key, you have to want to do it. I still have a long way to go my body confidence is shocking but hopefully it will come with time. Hubby is complete opposite to me and has the most amazing mind set of if people don't like him thats their choice he is happy. Hopefully I will get there. Sending you lots of support, you have got this! | |||
"I hate looking this way I feel 2nd class I can’t even walk around the house without a T-shirt on " I know exactly how you feel mate. I hit 65 on Thursday, I've never felt so low and insecure. I used to have such a lovely body. I just keep thinking that the four horsemen are not far away. | |||
"I hate looking this way I feel 2nd class I can’t even walk around the house without a T-shirt on " please try not to feel this way, since you have the power to make a change. i’ve put on weight and making amends by controlling food portion sizes and regular exercise. if I can do it, so can you (baby steps, and before you know it, you’ll see the transformation over time. Just need the will, and we all have that - remember one step at a time... Change will cum... Best wishes | |||
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"We put weight on through the pandemic and have started the Fast 800 way of eating. 3 weeks and 2 stone dropped already. That and walking is the key for us, exercise alone didn't do a thing other than getting fitter What's the Fast800 way? Time restricted eating, low carbs, high fat and protein. 800 is the calories you do it for 5-12 weeks. Sounds hard, but the food is great and the protein and veg are filling. Losing weight with weekend fry ups can't be bad " great thanks! | |||
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"Read a lot of this thread, and was going to put something to inspire. But having scrolled through again, I noticed that you've stopped what you were doing, and now can't, because of a verruca? Ffs, there's people out there who lose limbs, yet manage to carry on. Sounds to me like you need a good drink of man the fuck up juice!" Mibbe it was a really big verruca. | |||
"Hi all Thanks for your replies I was walking 10km a day until and it kept the fat down but I’ve had a verruca for 4 months, it’s really hard to get rid of. And has stopped me walking. I don’t have a great relationship with food. There’s so much I don’t like, but I like anything sweet. My weight is currently 80kg I’ll drop down to about 72kg then I’ll Rajesh it all back. I want to be about 67kg" A verucca? Mate there was a guy that climbed Mt Everest with no legs, ok he never had a verucca due to having no feet but he still got on with it. | |||
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"Read a lot of this thread, and was going to put something to inspire. But having scrolled through again, I noticed that you've stopped what you were doing, and now can't, because of a verruca? Ffs, there's people out there who lose limbs, yet manage to carry on. Sounds to me like you need a good drink of man the fuck up juice! Mibbe it was a really big verruca. " TBF, I totally agree with this. I currently have a broken collar bone. However found some machines in the gym I can use. Still missing running/cycling however. | |||
"I hate looking this way I feel 2nd class I can’t even walk around the house without a T-shirt on " Give yourself a shake and start exercising. Stop whining. | |||
"I hate looking this way I feel 2nd class I can’t even walk around the house without a T-shirt on " I'd go and have a chat with your GP because this sounds more like a symptoms of depression rather than what is making you depressed. | |||
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"Is there something more to feeling this way OP? Try and think about what's triggering these thoughts, write down how you're feeling on a daily basis. Maybe you'll then see a pattern and you can try and make small changes to your diet and life. Possibly talking to someone, outside of this site, would help you too. Hope you're ok x" Thank you You make some lovely points x | |||
"Read a lot of this thread, and was going to put something to inspire. But having scrolled through again, I noticed that you've stopped what you were doing, and now can't, because of a verruca? Ffs, there's people out there who lose limbs, yet manage to carry on. Sounds to me like you need a good drink of man the fuck up juice!" I’m able to walk 50km a day And in heat carrying a backpack. Right now I can’t walk to the shop. Your comment is not needed Or appreciated | |||
"The replies on this thread will have him feeling confident in no time " They don’t help do they | |||
"This will sound harsh but do something about it then. Complaining to a bunch of strangers on the internet will do fuck all. Don't over complicate things. Most people know what food is utter shite and what they shouldn't be eating. So cut back on the shite. You don't need a gym membership. It's only 10am on a Saturday morning. If you can, put your phone down and get out for a walk. Now. When you have time, look at body weight work puts on YouTube....nothing complicated, nothing fancy, no equipment required. And if anybody slags you off or comments on your body tell them to fucking do one." Strangely, I got turned on reading this! I bet you have a sexy accent too….. | |||
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"The replies on this thread will have him feeling confident in no time They don’t help do they " Don't take it to heart mate, men teaching out for support on here often receive a toxic reply. Punching down rather than a helping hand is too often the way, it's definitely them not you | |||
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"The replies on this thread will have him feeling confident in no time They don’t help do they Don't take it to heart mate, men teaching out for support on here often receive a toxic reply. Punching down rather than a helping hand is too often the way, it's definitely them not you " I disagree I don’t see any toxic replies on this thread nobody has punched him down at all. People have given really helpful advice with diet, mindset and training. | |||
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"The replies on this thread will have him feeling confident in no time They don’t help do they " You've had a lot of firm but constructive and gentle,understanding replies...in amongstthe daft one which come with any Fab thread. Everything from get up and move to seek professional help from your GP. If you genuinely believe that there is a mental health element to this then stop asking for advice on a sex site and reach out to friends, family, your GP or any Men's Mental Health charity in your area. Google will help you with that. | |||
"The replies on this thread will have him feeling confident in no time They don’t help do they Don't take it to heart mate, men teaching out for support on here often receive a toxic reply. Punching down rather than a helping hand is too often the way, it's definitely them not you I disagree I don’t see any toxic replies on this thread nobody has punched him down at all. People have given really helpful advice with diet, mindset and training." Exactly. | |||
"I hate looking this way I feel 2nd class I can’t even walk around the house without a T-shirt on Give yourself a shake and start exercising. Stop whining. " Yep, the OP is going to be thrilled with this. Look, I know you have to have thick skin on here, but he's a newbie, so cut him some slack. Would anyone say the same thing to people coming on here with mental health or depression problems? Should they just give themselves a shake? | |||
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"The replies on this thread will have him feeling confident in no time They don’t help do they You've had a lot of firm but constructive and gentle,understanding replies...in amongstthe daft one which come with any Fab thread. Everything from get up and move to seek professional help from your GP. If you genuinely believe that there is a mental health element to this then stop asking for advice on a sex site and reach out to friends, family, your GP or any Men's Mental Health charity in your area. Google will help you with that. " Sometimes it’s about being heard | |||
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"The replies on this thread will have him feeling confident in no time They don’t help do they You've had a lot of firm but constructive and gentle,understanding replies...in amongstthe daft one which come with any Fab thread. Everything from get up and move to seek professional help from your GP. If you genuinely believe that there is a mental health element to this then stop asking for advice on a sex site and reach out to friends, family, your GP or any Men's Mental Health charity in your area. Google will help you with that. Sometimes it’s about being heard " Well you've been heard plenty here too. Now time to take any of the advice above and choose to whether or not to act on it. | |||
"I hate looking this way I feel 2nd class I can’t even walk around the house without a T-shirt on " The journey of a 1000 miles starts with a single step. | |||
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"Read a lot of this thread, and was going to put something to inspire. But having scrolled through again, I noticed that you've stopped what you were doing, and now can't, because of a verruca? Ffs, there's people out there who lose limbs, yet manage to carry on. Sounds to me like you need a good drink of man the fuck up juice! I’m able to walk 50km a day And in heat carrying a backpack. Right now I can’t walk to the shop. Your comment is not needed Or appreciated " If you can do that you'll be burning approximately 3000 calories or more. Get rid of the verucca and you'll be like twiggy in no time. | |||
"Read a lot of this thread, and was going to put something to inspire. But having scrolled through again, I noticed that you've stopped what you were doing, and now can't, because of a verruca? Ffs, there's people out there who lose limbs, yet manage to carry on. Sounds to me like you need a good drink of man the fuck up juice! I’m able to walk 50km a day And in heat carrying a backpack. Right now I can’t walk to the shop. Your comment is not needed Or appreciated " Then get back to doing that. You've put this on a forum. Not all comments will be what you want to read. | |||
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