dear grim reaper, so far this year you have taken my favourite dancer michael jackson, my favourite actor patrick swayze, my favourite singer stephen gateley. just to let you know my favourite twins are john & edward |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"dear grim reaper, so far this year you have taken my favourite dancer michael jackson, my favourite actor patrick swayze, my favourite singer stephen gateley. just to let you know my favourite twins are john & edward"
haha, we can only hope eh  |
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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago
Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else |
"dear grim reaper, so far this year you have taken my favourite dancer michael jackson, my favourite actor patrick swayze, my favourite singer stephen gateley. just to let you know my favourite twins are john & edward"
If your taste is that shit, you should be asking him to take you!
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just for you pussy...
Two Scousers are on holiday in South Africa, hanging out on the riverbank. Suddenly a crocodile swims past with a blokes head in its mouth. "Fuckin' ell Terry, did you see that fella?" "I did Barry - and the flash bastard's got a LaCoste sleeping bag"
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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what sort of cheese do you need to take a small horse to a fancy dress party?...
mascerpone!!!!
what key do you need to open every lock in the country?
a pikey!!!  |
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By *andJ2227Couple
over a year ago
Swadlincote |
3 men in prison wondering how to put in there time,
Scotsman says 'i have a mouth organ i can play some music'
Englishman says 'i have a pack of cards we can play poker'
the Irishman takes out a box of tampons and says ' i wont be bored cos it says on the box, i can ride, swim, ski and play tennis with these' |
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My son was late home from school today...... so I said
"where ya been boy?" to which he replied, "going over my homework with Jessica", well, just then my wife came and put some snacks on the table, my son reaches over, takes one, and has a bite.
"Mmmmmmm...... these fishcakes are nice" says he...
"Go wash your fingers boy, they are doughnuts", says I!"! |
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By *im53Man
over a year ago
Boldon |
A blonde calls her husband at work one day and asks him, "Can you help me when you
get home?" "Sure," he replies. "What's the problem?"
"Well, I started a really hard puzzle and I can't even find the edge pieces." "Look on the
box," he said. "There's always a picture of what the puzzle is." "It's a big rooster," she
said. The husband arrives home and tells his blonde wife, "Okay, put the corn flakes back
in the box."
|
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"A blonde calls her husband at work one day and asks him, "Can you help me when you
get home?" "Sure," he replies. "What's the problem?"
"Well, I started a really hard puzzle and I can't even find the edge pieces." "Look on the
box," he said. "There's always a picture of what the puzzle is." "It's a big rooster," she
said. The husband arrives home and tells his blonde wife, "Okay, put the corn flakes back
in the box."
"
Lol, now that is funny!! |
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I was a first aider at work. One day got called to the typing pool, where a young blonde lady was sat feeling sorry for herself. When I asked her what was wrong, she said "it hurts all over".
I asked her to show me where, so she touched her knee and said "ouch", then her foot, "ouch" again, and so on, all over her body.
I took her hand in mine, and said "you daft cow you have broken your finger"!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sky Sports breaking news.
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.
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It has been announced that next year's shirt sponsor for Liverpool will be Tampax.
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a Spokesman for Tampax said "To sponsor a bunch of twats going through a bad period is exactly what our company is all about!" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Little girl finds her dog dead with its legs in the air and asks her dad why its like that. Dad says it's died and it's like that so Jesus can pick it up and take it to heaven. Next day she says 'Dad, mumnearly died today she was on her back with her legs in the air shouting 'Oh Jesus I'm coming' if the Milkman hadn't been holding her down, we'd have lost her |
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