I've just been told I'm not a true sub as I have limits, true subs don't have limits (within reason) - the reasons that the dom specifies (in this particular case).
Was I wrong to suggest that, even in this sexual dynamic there had to be limits/boundaries/respect of opines??? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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He is no 'Dom' if he isn't willing at accept and respect your limits.
It's a power exchange wrapped in trust and I personally wouldn't trust a 'Dom' who cannot respect basic limits. |
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"I've just been told I'm not a true sub as I have limits, true subs don't have limits (within reason) - the reasons that the dom specifies (in this particular case).
Was I wrong to suggest that, even in this sexual dynamic there had to be limits/boundaries/respect of opines??? "
No ..
What he said is a massive red flag, and not what a sub/Dom relationship should ever be..
Stay well away..
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"I've just been told I'm not a true sub as I have limits, true subs don't have limits (within reason) - the reasons that the dom specifies (in this particular case).
Was I wrong to suggest that, even in this sexual dynamic there had to be limits/boundaries/respect of opines??? "
Wow. Massive red flags with that one  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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More red flags than a fucking carnival.
Any Dom worth his salt will encourage you to state your limits and boundaries, discuss them at length, and respect them at ALL times. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"He sounds anything but dom. More a bully. "
Why would someone make someone else do something they didn’t want to do? How does that make both parties happy ?
The real trick is to have the other person you care about take down their own boundaries. That’s the real seduction.
If nobody knows that, they are playing a game they know nothing about.
More Dim than Dom.  |
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"He sounds anything but dom. More a bully.
Why would someone make someone else do something they didn’t want to do? How does that make both parties happy ?
The real trick is to have the other person you care about take down their own boundaries. That’s the real seduction.
If nobody knows that, they are playing a game they know nothing about.
More Dim than Dom. "
The dim gave me a good old belly laugh - which is quite opportune as I have an old belly xxxx |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"I've just been told I'm not a true sub as I have limits, true subs don't have limits (within reason) - the reasons that the dom specifies (in this particular case).
Was I wrong to suggest that, even in this sexual dynamic there had to be limits/boundaries/respect of opines??? "
As the self appointed bearer of the ring of Domliness - this person is an absolute tool who has no idea of what he is talking about, and any experience he has is based on poorly written erotica and porn.
This is the type of person that gives the kink scene a bad reputation, and is likely going to end up damaging someone (physically, mentally or both).
Everyone has limits and they are to be respected.
Any form of power dynamic is based on negotiation, communication and consent. This guy wouldn’t know what it meant to he a Dom if it walked up and face fucked him with its fist. |
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I'm just exploring the dom/sub relationship and loving it. I have a few things for me. Out of sex, we are 100% equal, no questions asked. Within sex, these are kept within the most conservative levels of one another. The minute a person says, you have reached my limit, it is respected, and cherished as the limit. The stepped back to that limit.
Any person pushing you over your safe word is an absolute arsehole, and does not deserve to be with you. You are wonderful in your sub relationship, and deserve every piece of respect going. Keep yourself safe!!! x x"
Oh, for the record, I'm sub
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Dom’s are there to push you to your limit not force you over them. They are going to encourage you to reach the highest of highs and make sure that you are safe and respected in the process.
Subs ultimately have control - over their body, over their limit, and have to be treated with great care. They may be submissive, but they hold all the cards in the end. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"He sounds anything but dom. More a bully.
Why would someone make someone else do something they didn’t want to do? How does that make both parties happy ?
The real trick is to have the other person you care about take down their own boundaries. That’s the real seduction.
If nobody knows that, they are playing a game they know nothing about.
More Dim than Dom.
The dim gave me a good old belly laugh - which is quite opportune as I have an old belly xxxx"
 you’re welcome. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Dom’s are there to push you to your limit not force you over them. They are going to encourage you to reach the highest of highs and make sure that you are safe and respected in the process.
Subs ultimately have control - over their body, over their limit, and have to be treated with great care. They may be submissive, but they hold all the cards in the end."
It’s a power exchange, no one is greater |
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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago
Not all that North of North London |
"I've just been told I'm not a true sub as I have limits, true subs don't have limits (within reason) - the reasons that the dom specifies (in this particular case).
Was I wrong to suggest that, even in this sexual dynamic there had to be limits/boundaries/respect of opines??? "
Any Dom who preaches about true Subs should be avoided.
And this one sounds dangerous and abusive as there's clearly no understanding of consent
Personally I'd neverbpkay with anyone who couldn't clearly define their limits nor anyone who would ignore them. Limits evolve and change for all of us but again thst should be mutual and consensusl |
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"I've just been told I'm not a true sub as I have limits, true subs don't have limits (within reason) - the reasons that the dom specifies (in this particular case).
Was I wrong to suggest that, even in this sexual dynamic there had to be limits/boundaries/respect of opines??? "
Fake Dom/abuser. Red flag. Run like fuck.
It’s actually the subs that hold all the power. Doms only have power because the subs let us 
Put it this way: You have a safeword. You use it. He doesn’t respect that because “you’re not truly submissive.” Then what? You get bloody hurt (and not in the good kinky consensual way.) |
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"I've just been told I'm not a true sub as I have limits, true subs don't have limits (within reason) - the reasons that the dom specifies (in this particular case).
Was I wrong to suggest that, even in this sexual dynamic there had to be limits/boundaries/respect of opines???
Fake Dom/abuser. Red flag. Run like fuck.
It’s actually the subs that hold all the power. Doms only have power because the subs let us
Put it this way: You have a safeword. You use it. He doesn’t respect that because “you’re not truly submissive.” Then what? You get bloody hurt (and not in the good kinky consensual way.)"
Been there, had that in this scenario. Had handmarks round my throat and hair pulled out (because, apparently I liked it) Think ill just stay on here for the forums now
Thank you for all the replies xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've just been told I'm not a true sub as I have limits, true subs don't have limits (within reason) - the reasons that the dom specifies (in this particular case).
Was I wrong to suggest that, even in this sexual dynamic there had to be limits/boundaries/respect of opines???
Fake Dom/abuser. Red flag. Run like fuck.
It’s actually the subs that hold all the power. Doms only have power because the subs let us
Put it this way: You have a safeword. You use it. He doesn’t respect that because “you’re not truly submissive.” Then what? You get bloody hurt (and not in the good kinky consensual way.)"
The D/s dynamic is a power exchange. Neither party holds all the power, you can’t have one without the other. |
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It's not for them to berate you for your limits. That to me is a bit of a toxic trait. It's one thing to try and open up people up to new experiences but it's another thing to shame people for their limitations and/or use shaming tactics as a form of coercion. |
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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago
Not all that North of North London |
"I've just been told I'm not a true sub as I have limits, true subs don't have limits (within reason) - the reasons that the dom specifies (in this particular case).
Was I wrong to suggest that, even in this sexual dynamic there had to be limits/boundaries/respect of opines???
Fake Dom/abuser. Red flag. Run like fuck.
It’s actually the subs that hold all the power. Doms only have power because the subs let us
Put it this way: You have a safeword. You use it. He doesn’t respect that because “you’re not truly submissive.” Then what? You get bloody hurt (and not in the good kinky consensual way.)
Been there, had that in this scenario. Had handmarks round my throat and hair pulled out (because, apparently I liked it) Think ill just stay on here for the forums now
Thank you for all the replies xxx"
That's not D/s that's abuse |
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