FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Is it difficult for Asians here?
Is it difficult for Asians here?
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. " Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine " It's not the KKK but certain parts of the swinging community are very racist So will I understand why he's asking the question I don't agree that it's more difficult for him just because he's asian | |||
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"No its not. It's difficult for all men due to the ratio of men to women. " second this, but Asian guys don't really help there case on here | |||
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"No its not. It's difficult for all men due to the ratio of men to women. " I can agree with it. Women are right in their part when they sometimes don't reply coz obviously nobody spends their whole day here. | |||
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"Well that all depends on the individual. I can definitely make it difficult for you by testing you on Advanced Calculus and Linear Algebra???" Go on lad. My engineer instincts are pretty strong. I'm sure we can play around Maxwell's equations as well?  | |||
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"No its not. It's difficult for all men due to the ratio of men to women. second this, but Asian guys don't really help there case on here " That's actually true. It's a vicious circle. | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine It's not the KKK but certain parts of the swinging community are very racist So will I understand why he's asking the question I don't agree that it's more difficult for him just because he's asian " Really? I didn’t think that there would be a problem?? I know you might come across individuals but not many | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine It's not the KKK but certain parts of the swinging community are very racist So will I understand why he's asking the question I don't agree that it's more difficult for him just because he's asian " You pretty much explained the whole issue. Don't like to take out the racism card but sadly that's been the case. But i guess it's all about timing and the right person. | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine It's not the KKK but certain parts of the swinging community are very racist So will I understand why he's asking the question I don't agree that it's more difficult for him just because he's asian Really? I didn’t think that there would be a problem?? I know you might come across individuals but not many " Yes really, I've had more than my fair share of racial abuse on here Mostly when I say I'm not interested or if I delete a message without responding and very few occasions where I've been sent racist messages unprovoked. | |||
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"For men yes, for women no. The 1st generation tended to get a poor reputation for being overly dominant and demanding, the 2nd and 3rd and beyond generations no, to a point that in the same way BBC is heavily demanded Asian will be the same within a wanted quadrant. Patience is everybody's friend. Good luck friend." Nice one mate. | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine It's not the KKK but certain parts of the swinging community are very racist So will I understand why he's asking the question I don't agree that it's more difficult for him just because he's asian Really? I didn’t think that there would be a problem?? I know you might come across individuals but not many Yes really, I've had more than my fair share of racial abuse on here Mostly when I say I'm not interested or if I delete a message without responding and very few occasions where I've been sent racist messages unprovoked." This shit sucks. Men also don't help their cause. | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine It's not the KKK but certain parts of the swinging community are very racist So will I understand why he's asking the question I don't agree that it's more difficult for him just because he's asian You pretty much explained the whole issue. Don't like to take out the racism card but sadly that's been the case. But i guess it's all about timing and the right person." There are ALOT of women of all races who won't care what race you are, if you are respectful, you put effort into your profile and they find you attractive then they will respond and possibly meet you. I 100% understand why you have asked the question having been on and off here for years as a black women however I don't think that overall your race will be a barrier for people to meet you | |||
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"Asian guys don't really help there case on here " Why do you think this, or are you just generalising Asians in particular? | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine It's not the KKK but certain parts of the swinging community are very racist So will I understand why he's asking the question I don't agree that it's more difficult for him just because he's asian Really? I didn’t think that there would be a problem?? I know you might come across individuals but not many Yes really, I've had more than my fair share of racial abuse on here Mostly when I say I'm not interested or if I delete a message without responding and very few occasions where I've been sent racist messages unprovoked. This shit sucks. Men also don't help their cause." Well because of it now I prefer to stick to my own just because its easier but I used to date all races. My first bf was Pakistani and my last bf was white. Race never used to matter to me until I joined here and saw the way some people of other races speak about Black women when they don't get their own way | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine It's not the KKK but certain parts of the swinging community are very racist So will I understand why he's asking the question I don't agree that it's more difficult for him just because he's asian You pretty much explained the whole issue. Don't like to take out the racism card but sadly that's been the case. But i guess it's all about timing and the right person. There are ALOT of women of all races who won't care what race you are, if you are respectful, you put effort into your profile and they find you attractive then they will respond and possibly meet you. I 100% understand why you have asked the question having been on and off here for years as a black women however I don't think that overall your race will be a barrier for people to meet you " The problem is, we might not find any flaws with our profile. And i understand from a women's perspective that if a man can't put effort in his own bloody profile, how do you expect him to give you a good time and he respectable? But what about guys who are shy and genuinely suck at writing about themselves but are great when it comes to face to face? Uggh, it's so weird and annoying. Sorry to tickle your mind rn. | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine It's not the KKK but certain parts of the swinging community are very racist So will I understand why he's asking the question I don't agree that it's more difficult for him just because he's asian You pretty much explained the whole issue. Don't like to take out the racism card but sadly that's been the case. But i guess it's all about timing and the right person. There are ALOT of women of all races who won't care what race you are, if you are respectful, you put effort into your profile and they find you attractive then they will respond and possibly meet you. I 100% understand why you have asked the question having been on and off here for years as a black women however I don't think that overall your race will be a barrier for people to meet you The problem is, we might not find any flaws with our profile. And i understand from a women's perspective that if a man can't put effort in his own bloody profile, how do you expect him to give you a good time and he respectable? But what about guys who are shy and genuinely suck at writing about themselves but are great when it comes to face to face? Uggh, it's so weird and annoying. Sorry to tickle your mind rn." There's a profile help section of the forum, if you need help then I would recommend commenting on there and people will give you pointers | |||
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"Well that all depends on the individual. I can definitely make it difficult for you by testing you on Advanced Calculus and Linear Algebra??? Go on lad. My engineer instincts are pretty strong. I'm sure we can play around Maxwell's equations as well? "Oh shit, touché bro touché  | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine It's not the KKK but certain parts of the swinging community are very racist So will I understand why he's asking the question I don't agree that it's more difficult for him just because he's asian Really? I didn’t think that there would be a problem?? I know you might come across individuals but not many Yes really, I've had more than my fair share of racial abuse on here Mostly when I say I'm not interested or if I delete a message without responding and very few occasions where I've been sent racist messages unprovoked. This shit sucks. Men also don't help their cause. Well because of it now I prefer to stick to my own just because its easier but I used to date all races. My first bf was Pakistani and my last bf was white. Race never used to matter to me until I joined here and saw the way some people of other races speak about Black women when they don't get their own way " That's the sad world we live in. No matter how much we talk about diversity and inclusion, we'll always have sad sods trying to pull the world down. | |||
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"Your profile wording isn`t the best,if you`re looking for meets.. " Tbh, I'm not really sure what I'm looking for. Yes I'd love to meet but I'd love to get along with the lady first. That's where i lose my game coz most of them ladies aren't into the talking thingy! | |||
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"Well that all depends on the individual. I can definitely make it difficult for you by testing you on Advanced Calculus and Linear Algebra??? Go on lad. My engineer instincts are pretty strong. I'm sure we can play around Maxwell's equations as well?
Oh shit, touché bro touché "Cheers mate! | |||
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"I lose my game coz most of them ladies aren't into the talking thingy!" Buy them a Ball gag then  | |||
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"I lose my game coz most of them ladies aren't into the talking thingy! Buy them a Ball gag then "Hahahaha | |||
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"I think alot of Asian men are a little head strong, it's an attitude thing. I find the Asian men who get the most fun are laid back and not pushy being respectful and are able to take no for an answer, not saying you don't get the attitude thing with other guys. You'll find they find it just as difficult. Be patient put your personality to the fore, ladies will see beyond the surface and pre conceptions. Good luck "Beautifully put up. Really encouraging. Thanks! x | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine It's not the KKK but certain parts of the swinging community are very racist So will I understand why he's asking the question I don't agree that it's more difficult for him just because he's asian Really? I didn’t think that there would be a problem?? I know you might come across individuals but not many Yes really, I've had more than my fair share of racial abuse on here Mostly when I say I'm not interested or if I delete a message without responding and very few occasions where I've been sent racist messages unprovoked." Bloody hell there seriously isn’t any need for people to be racist at all! | |||
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"There's some absolute dickheads on this website too. Literally mocking and abusing me in my DM's. Simply fuck off!" Report and then block its disgusting! I’ve had some disgusting messages in my time but nothing like racism | |||
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"There's some absolute dickheads on this website too. Literally mocking and abusing me in my DM's. Simply fuck off! Report and then block its disgusting! I’ve had some disgusting messages in my time but nothing like racism " A guy and a lady just DM'ed me and literally told me to put down the post coz apparently it adds as a fuel to racism and I don't have respect for ladies. So fucking pissed off rn. | |||
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"There's some absolute dickheads on this website too. Literally mocking and abusing me in my DM's. Simply fuck off!" There are dickheads in every walk of life, no matter where you go and how old you are, it's how you deal with it that matters | |||
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"There's some absolute dickheads on this website too. Literally mocking and abusing me in my DM's. Simply fuck off! There are dickheads in every walk of life, no matter where you go and how old you are, it's how you deal with it that matters "Thankyou Sir!  | |||
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"There's some absolute dickheads on this website too. Literally mocking and abusing me in my DM's. Simply fuck off! Report and then block its disgusting! I’ve had some disgusting messages in my time but nothing like racism A guy and a lady just DM'ed me and literally told me to put down the post coz apparently it adds as a fuel to racism and I don't have respect for ladies. So fucking pissed off rn." Pity they couldn’t actually come on the thread and say it themselves bigots cannot stand them! Your post isn’t disrespectful at all so I wouldn’t be pissed off by people who don’t matter | |||
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"There's some absolute dickheads on this website too. Literally mocking and abusing me in my DM's. Simply fuck off! Report and then block its disgusting! I’ve had some disgusting messages in my time but nothing like racism A guy and a lady just DM'ed me and literally told me to put down the post coz apparently it adds as a fuel to racism and I don't have respect for ladies. So fucking pissed off rn. Pity they couldn’t actually come on the thread and say it themselves bigots cannot stand them! Your post isn’t disrespectful at all so I wouldn’t be pissed off by people who don’t matter " Thank you so much. Cowards the 2 of them. | |||
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"I would encourage you to report them but reporting abusive messages doesn't actually do anything " Simply blocked them and moving on!  | |||
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"There's some absolute dickheads on this website too. Literally mocking and abusing me in my DM's. Simply fuck off!" The funniest part of this is that the 2 accounts in question have never ever posted in the forum. Clearly people who have nothing better to do than lurk on here and then send people abuse to try and entertain themselves | |||
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"No its not. It's difficult for all men due to the ratio of men to women. second this, but Asian guys don't really help there case on here " Would be interested to know what!!! | |||
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"Your profile wording isn`t the best,if you`re looking for meets.. Tbh, I'm not really sure what I'm looking for. Yes I'd love to meet but I'd love to get along with the lady first. That's where i lose my game coz most of them ladies aren't into the talking thingy!" Look for socials. Usually posted in the Meets forum section. | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine It's not the KKK but certain parts of the swinging community are very racist So will I understand why he's asking the question I don't agree that it's more difficult for him just because he's asian Really? I didn’t think that there would be a problem?? I know you might come across individuals but not many Yes really, I've had more than my fair share of racial abuse on here Mostly when I say I'm not interested or if I delete a message without responding and very few occasions where I've been sent racist messages unprovoked." | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine It's not the KKK but certain parts of the swinging community are very racist So will I understand why he's asking the question I don't agree that it's more difficult for him just because he's asian Really? I didn’t think that there would be a problem?? I know you might come across individuals but not many Yes really, I've had more than my fair share of racial abuse on here Mostly when I say I'm not interested or if I delete a message without responding and very few occasions where I've been sent racist messages unprovoked. "This is funny to you? | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. " You WILL come across profiles who specify "No Asians", but don't get hung up on them. There is no point worrying about those who you don't appeal to. There are also many that say No Blacks, or Blacks only, or no single guys, or nobody under 30 etc... The site IS tough for single guys, but those with good profiles and a positive attitude will do OK regardless of the colour of their skin. Cal | |||
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"Well that all depends on the individual. I can definitely make it difficult for you by testing you on Advanced Calculus and Linear Algebra???" Lol. This made me giggle x | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine It's not the KKK but certain parts of the swinging community are very racist So will I understand why he's asking the question I don't agree that it's more difficult for him just because he's asian Really? I didn’t think that there would be a problem?? I know you might come across individuals but not many Yes really, I've had more than my fair share of racial abuse on here Mostly when I say I'm not interested or if I delete a message without responding and very few occasions where I've been sent racist messages unprovoked.
This is funny to you?"Not funny by very far. Tbh. If i was to actually share info,s it would be flooded with experiences of this kind!! | |||
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If you ever want a chat then my messages are always open | |||
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"There's some absolute dickheads on this website too. Literally mocking and abusing me in my DM's. Simply fuck off! The funniest part of this is that the 2 accounts in question have never ever posted in the forum. Clearly people who have nothing better to do than lurk on here and then send people abuse to try and entertain themselves " Really pity the sad fuckers! | |||
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"There are prejudices. You may find it harder than non Asians and its hard enough for all men due to numbers. Not accommodating though makes if much harder and a bad profile will make it near on impossible. Good luck though. There are some wonderful Asian guys who do just fine. " Thank you for your input. Means a lot to me! | |||
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"Your profile wording isn`t the best,if you`re looking for meets.. Tbh, I'm not really sure what I'm looking for. Yes I'd love to meet but I'd love to get along with the lady first. That's where i lose my game coz most of them ladies aren't into the talking thingy! Look for socials. Usually posted in the Meets forum section. "Sure thing. Thank you so much! x | |||
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"Sorry you've received abuse as a result of this thread OP. I think you've asked a reasonable question and responded in a great way. Unfortunately, many threads like this attract those who deny racism even exists here - and it certainly does! I'm sure you'll do fine. "The only way to move forward in life is to be respectful. That's all i try to be. And tbh, it's the uncomfortable chats that make you more comfortable. Thank you for understanding! x | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. You WILL come across profiles who specify "No Asians", but don't get hung up on them. There is no point worrying about those who you don't appeal to. There are also many that say No Blacks, or Blacks only, or no single guys, or nobody under 30 etc... The site IS tough for single guys, but those with good profiles and a positive attitude will do OK regardless of the colour of their skin. Cal" Thank you Sir! | |||
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"You seem like a decent laid back chap fella so I wouldn't worry .. Keep being you and you'll do just fine "Thanks mate. We move!  | |||
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"I've never receieved abuse (racist or otherwise) on here but I can certainly believe it to have happened. My own personal take on the site is to have fun with my profile/pictures in a way that makes me happy with the result. Use the forums and be myself, I'm not pandering to anyone else because after all, you'll get nowhere projecting a fake image and you'll be found out quickly. Lastly, I don't let anything bother. A profile says no asians? No problem. No one under 40? Sweet. No one with a beard? Nae bother. There's thousands of people on the site, I haven't got time to be hung up on one contingent. You seem like a decent guy OP and your responses on here have been very level headed and well worded. It might take some time to find your groove on here because it can't seem intimidating/disheartening but I think you'll do just fine
If you ever want a chat then my messages are always open "Couldn't have summed it up in a better way. I'm still learning my way up and your message really helps to get more insights on as to how things work here. Hopefully I'll get going! | |||
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"From what I've seen, yes it is. Personally I don't see why race is even mentioned on profiles, doesn't define the person you would be meeting. Anyone who does have that attitude, they are not for you anyway so don't worry about it." That's exactly what i believe in. The races thing shouldn't even be a thing anymore especially on this website. But yeah, we definitely need more people like you who are so understanding and comfortable to talk about such things! x | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine It's not the KKK but certain parts of the swinging community are very racist So will I understand why he's asking the question I don't agree that it's more difficult for him just because he's asian " Certain parts of society are very racist and people of all races can be racist. | |||
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"Who ever messaging you saying this is racist tell them fuck of nothing racist in the slightest about this post I see your point though I absolutely love Asian women but they don't seem to be many on here " Agreed Sir. Maybe because they also understand the thing I'm talking about and can feel that it's not worth taking the risk. | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine It's not the KKK but certain parts of the swinging community are very racist So will I understand why he's asking the question I don't agree that it's more difficult for him just because he's asian Certain parts of society are very racist and people of all races can be racist. " Unfortunately that's very true. It's a shame that we have to face this in 2022. But there are some really good people as well. It's just about finding them! | |||
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"Me personally, I believe I'd have so much more success on here if I was white or Black. As soon as I tell someone I'm half Asian.. its message deleted and blocked. I've also had so much racial abuse on here" Some people are such scum! Sorry but they are. There is no need for it they could just pass on by without having to even comment on the colour of one’s skin makes me feel sick | |||
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"And I've reported it to the admins on here and they don't do nothing." I’ve reported many people on here but I do wonder if anything is ever done or not | |||
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"Me personally, I believe I'd have so much more success on here if I was white or Black. As soon as I tell someone I'm half Asian.. its message deleted and blocked. I've also had so much racial abuse on here" Really? I'm half Asian too but don't think I've ever had that issue but then, I don't really bring it up to draw attention to it I suppose. Been told I'm all sorts of nationality before though.. Greek, Italian, Spanish.. not even close lol | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! " This comment killed me off lol. I think the issue is you've got a penis not the colour of your skin. I don't have any issues. | |||
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"Me personally, I believe I'd have so much more success on here if I was white or Black. As soon as I tell someone I'm half Asian.. its message deleted and blocked. I've also had so much racial abuse on here Really? I'm half Asian too but don't think I've ever had that issue but then, I don't really bring it up to draw attention to it I suppose. Been told I'm all sorts of nationality before though.. Greek, Italian, Spanish.. not even close lol" When a hint of asian is detected the opinion changes greatly. If you pass as european greek spanish,italian or otherwise its game you pass the immigration test. Enjoy and long may it last. Unforinate for some the exterior is very unique. | |||
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"I think us single guys who can’t accommodate can struggle on here as there is just so many of us.We can then go threw a phase where we start to wonder is it our nationality and in my case is it my age I am 54.I have seen and contributed to similar threads like this and there is a minority that come across as racist / ignorant to Indian heritage.I have actually put on my profile I am Greek Cypriot born and raised in London as in the past I have received messages and told at Rios spa I don’t play with Indians or the P word." Nasty useing the "P " word!!! | |||
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"And I've reported it to the admins on here and they don't do nothing. I’ve reported many people on here but I do wonder if anything is ever done or not " Even as a ladie, not good to know tbh. | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! This comment killed me off lol. I think the issue is you've got a penis not the colour of your skin. I don't have any issues. " You have genuinely reached adulthood and not noticed that gender as well as race play a part in racial stereotyping? That Asian women are often fetishised as exotic while Asian men - particularly those from Pakistan, India and Bangladesh are the subjects of all kinds of narrow minded assumptions - everything from being dirty to pedophiles? Mr | |||
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"There’s one girl who I think is super hot and she’ll only date Asian men! So it’s just different strokes for different folks. " Cheers for the info fella. Its a numbers game on here and on life. If the face fits. | |||
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"No its not. It's difficult for all men due to the ratio of men to women. " I read that it’s difficult for everyone. We all have our problems with the site that we have to navigate, so saying why we find things difficult is very subjective. *just my opinion. But op, you are. Single bloke, it’s difficult to get any one to look at your profile when there are soooo many men to choose from. | |||
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"I think us single guys who can’t accommodate can struggle on here as there is just so many of us.We can then go threw a phase where we start to wonder is it our nationality and in my case is it my age I am 54.I have seen and contributed to similar threads like this and there is a minority that come across as racist / ignorant to Indian heritage.I have actually put on my profile I am Greek Cypriot born and raised in London as in the past I have received messages and told at Rios spa I don’t play with Indians or the P word. Nasty useing the "P " word!!! " . Yes the P word is nasty and really shouldn’t be acceptable in today’s day and age although it should never have been acceptable to begin with but that is another story | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! This comment killed me off lol. I think the issue is you've got a penis not the colour of your skin. I don't have any issues. You have genuinely reached adulthood and not noticed that gender as well as race play a part in racial stereotyping? That Asian women are often fetishised as exotic while Asian men - particularly those from Pakistan, India and Bangladesh are the subjects of all kinds of narrow minded assumptions - everything from being dirty to pedophiles? Mr" The question was is it difficult for Asians on here. | |||
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"No its not. It's difficult for all men due to the ratio of men to women. I read that it’s difficult for everyone. We all have our problems with the site that we have to navigate, so saying why we find things difficult is very subjective. *just my opinion. But op, you are. Single bloke, it’s difficult to get any one to look at your profile when there are soooo many men to choose from. "Absolutely this. Women have it hard, couples have it harder, men have it hardest | |||
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"I think us single guys who can’t accommodate can struggle on here as there is just so many of us.We can then go threw a phase where we start to wonder is it our nationality and in my case is it my age I am 54.I have seen and contributed to similar threads like this and there is a minority that come across as racist / ignorant to Indian heritage.I have actually put on my profile I am Greek Cypriot born and raised in London as in the past I have received messages and told at Rios spa I don’t play with Indians or the P word. Nasty useing the "P " word!!! . Yes the P word is nasty and really shouldn’t be acceptable in today’s day and age although it should never have been acceptable to begin with but that is another story " Yeah too right! . It was a word devised by the locals to discriminate the brown skinned people whom were invited over to work in the late 50,s. That word and other words were rife back in the 60,s,70,s,80,s 90,s. More underground there on. But heavily covert on the net and on fab. Some cannot contain the urge so they hate on here,only based upon peoples skin colour. Deep down they hate who they really are and what they are. They will not get help nor adresse the issue,so they bully people who do not fit their narrative! | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! This comment killed me off lol. I think the issue is you've got a penis not the colour of your skin. I don't have any issues. You have genuinely reached adulthood and not noticed that gender as well as race play a part in racial stereotyping? That Asian women are often fetishised as exotic while Asian men - particularly those from Pakistan, India and Bangladesh are the subjects of all kinds of narrow minded assumptions - everything from being dirty to pedophiles? Mr The question was is it difficult for Asians on here. " Lets get some numbers going? Shall we. Any asian men wish to comment. From useing fab what has their experience been so far? | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! This comment killed me off lol. I think the issue is you've got a penis not the colour of your skin. I don't have any issues. You have genuinely reached adulthood and not noticed that gender as well as race play a part in racial stereotyping? That Asian women are often fetishised as exotic while Asian men - particularly those from Pakistan, India and Bangladesh are the subjects of all kinds of narrow minded assumptions - everything from being dirty to pedophiles? Mr The question was is it difficult for Asians on here. " Tbh It's difficult for most minorities on here But as to whether its difficult for him to get meets because he is an Asian man then I would probably say no. There are alot more men on here than women so numbers alone will make it difficult regardless of any other factors (race, height, weight etc) | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! This comment killed me off lol. I think the issue is you've got a penis not the colour of your skin. I don't have any issues. You have genuinely reached adulthood and not noticed that gender as well as race play a part in racial stereotyping? That Asian women are often fetishised as exotic while Asian men - particularly those from Pakistan, India and Bangladesh are the subjects of all kinds of narrow minded assumptions - everything from being dirty to pedophiles? Mr The question was is it difficult for Asians on here. Lets get some numbers going? Shall we. Any asian men wish to comment. From useing fab what has their experience been so far? " I'm not an Asian man but my experience on here hasn't been great From being racially abused unprovoked, to being racially abused because I'm not interested in meeting, to the people who fetishise me cause of my skin colour to the people who think its appropriate to message me asking about my 'black pussy' (I wonder if white men ever say this to white women) it can be a nightmare. Unfortunately since being on here I've made the decision to only stick to black men as it seems to be the only safe option | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! This comment killed me off lol. I think the issue is you've got a penis not the colour of your skin. I don't have any issues. You have genuinely reached adulthood and not noticed that gender as well as race play a part in racial stereotyping? That Asian women are often fetishised as exotic while Asian men - particularly those from Pakistan, India and Bangladesh are the subjects of all kinds of narrow minded assumptions - everything from being dirty to pedophiles? Mr The question was is it difficult for Asians on here. Lets get some numbers going? Shall we. Any asian men wish to comment. From useing fab what has their experience been so far? " Again because they've got a dick not a vagina. Men in general have it hard. Some people will of course discriminate because someone is a certain race (not just Asian). Doesn't take away his question was about being Asian in general not hence my response. | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! This comment killed me off lol. I think the issue is you've got a penis not the colour of your skin. I don't have any issues. You have genuinely reached adulthood and not noticed that gender as well as race play a part in racial stereotyping? That Asian women are often fetishised as exotic while Asian men - particularly those from Pakistan, India and Bangladesh are the subjects of all kinds of narrow minded assumptions - everything from being dirty to pedophiles? Mr The question was is it difficult for Asians on here. Tbh It's difficult for most minorities on here But as to whether its difficult for him to get meets because he is an Asian man then I would probably say no. There are alot more men on here than women so numbers alone will make it difficult regardless of any other factors (race, height, weight etc) " Exactly this | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! This comment killed me off lol. I think the issue is you've got a penis not the colour of your skin. I don't have any issues. You have genuinely reached adulthood and not noticed that gender as well as race play a part in racial stereotyping? That Asian women are often fetishised as exotic while Asian men - particularly those from Pakistan, India and Bangladesh are the subjects of all kinds of narrow minded assumptions - everything from being dirty to pedophiles? Mr The question was is it difficult for Asians on here. " Fair point. Mr | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! This comment killed me off lol. I think the issue is you've got a penis not the colour of your skin. I don't have any issues. You have genuinely reached adulthood and not noticed that gender as well as race play a part in racial stereotyping? That Asian women are often fetishised as exotic while Asian men - particularly those from Pakistan, India and Bangladesh are the subjects of all kinds of narrow minded assumptions - everything from being dirty to pedophiles? Mr The question was is it difficult for Asians on here. Lets get some numbers going? Shall we. Any asian men wish to comment. From useing fab what has their experience been so far? I'm not an Asian man but my experience on here hasn't been great From being racially abused unprovoked, to being racially abused because I'm not interested in meeting, to the people who fetishise me cause of my skin colour to the people who think its appropriate to message me asking about my 'black pussy' (I wonder if white men ever say this to white women) it can be a nightmare. Unfortunately since being on here I've made the decision to only stick to black men as it seems to be the only safe option " I agree. Pls pm. I shall share more with you. Thnx | |||
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"No its not. It's difficult for all men due to the ratio of men to women. I read that it’s difficult for everyone. We all have our problems with the site that we have to navigate, so saying why we find things difficult is very subjective. *just my opinion. But op, you are. Single bloke, it’s difficult to get any one to look at your profile when there are soooo many men to choose from.
Absolutely this. Women have it hard, couples have it harder, men have it hardest"Women don’t exactly have it hard; three of my solo female friends over the last three weeks are overrun with offers, and have been enjoying meets aplenty. Unless of course, by ‘hard’ you mean, hard to find time……? OP; single guys do have it ‘hardest’ of all in here. If people do use your ethnicity as the reason to reject you, just block them and move on. They’re not worth your time. At the end of the day, if you only find one person through Fab, who you click with and share great times with, it will all have been worth it | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! This comment killed me off lol. I think the issue is you've got a penis not the colour of your skin. I don't have any issues. You have genuinely reached adulthood and not noticed that gender as well as race play a part in racial stereotyping? That Asian women are often fetishised as exotic while Asian men - particularly those from Pakistan, India and Bangladesh are the subjects of all kinds of narrow minded assumptions - everything from being dirty to pedophiles? Mr The question was is it difficult for Asians on here. Lets get some numbers going? Shall we. Any asian men wish to comment. From useing fab what has their experience been so far? I'm not an Asian man but my experience on here hasn't been great From being racially abused unprovoked, to being racially abused because I'm not interested in meeting, to the people who fetishise me cause of my skin colour to the people who think its appropriate to message me asking about my 'black pussy' (I wonder if white men ever say this to white women) it can be a nightmare. Unfortunately since being on here I've made the decision to only stick to black men as it seems to be the only safe option " So you've decided to stick to only black men because you've had racial abuse from a tiny percentage of non-black men on here? How is that any different to the kind of racial profiling that the OP is alluding to? | |||
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"It's difficult for all men on here. But slightly harder for Asians as poor previous experience with one or two Asians seems to then be applied across a whole race of people, regardless or culture or origin. " This what I think but you put it more concisely. I also think they come to that conclusion because the pool of Asian swingers is small to start with so it's easy to think 1 or 2 bad experiences apply to the majority. | |||
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"No its not. It's difficult for all men due to the ratio of men to women. " As she says! | |||
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"No its not. It's difficult for all men due to the ratio of men to women. I read that it’s difficult for everyone. We all have our problems with the site that we have to navigate, so saying why we find things difficult is very subjective. *just my opinion. But op, you are. Single bloke, it’s difficult to get any one to look at your profile when there are soooo many men to choose from.
Absolutely this. Women have it hard, couples have it harder, men have it hardest
Women don’t exactly have it hard; three of my solo female friends over the last three weeks are overrun with offers, and have been enjoying meets aplenty. Unless of course, by ‘hard’ you mean, hard to find time……?
OP; single guys do have it ‘hardest’ of all in here. If people do use your ethnicity as the reason to reject you, just block them and move on. They’re not worth your time. At the end of the day, if you only find one person through Fab, who you click with and share great times with, it will all have been worth it "Oh so your 3 friends define all of the women's experiences on FAB. Good to know lol | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! This comment killed me off lol. I think the issue is you've got a penis not the colour of your skin. I don't have any issues. You have genuinely reached adulthood and not noticed that gender as well as race play a part in racial stereotyping? That Asian women are often fetishised as exotic while Asian men - particularly those from Pakistan, India and Bangladesh are the subjects of all kinds of narrow minded assumptions - everything from being dirty to pedophiles? Mr The question was is it difficult for Asians on here. Lets get some numbers going? Shall we. Any asian men wish to comment. From useing fab what has their experience been so far? I'm not an Asian man but my experience on here hasn't been great From being racially abused unprovoked, to being racially abused because I'm not interested in meeting, to the people who fetishise me cause of my skin colour to the people who think its appropriate to message me asking about my 'black pussy' (I wonder if white men ever say this to white women) it can be a nightmare. Unfortunately since being on here I've made the decision to only stick to black men as it seems to be the only safe option So you've decided to stick to only black men because you've had racial abuse from a tiny percentage of non-black men on here? How is that any different to the kind of racial profiling that the OP is alluding to?" Yes I have because 1, it's not a 'tiny percentage' and 2 I only started sleeping with white men when I joined fab, so it's actually my personal preference. It was only curiosity why I started meeting them in the first place | |||
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"No its not. It's difficult for all men due to the ratio of men to women. I read that it’s difficult for everyone. We all have our problems with the site that we have to navigate, so saying why we find things difficult is very subjective. *just my opinion. But op, you are. Single bloke, it’s difficult to get any one to look at your profile when there are soooo many men to choose from.
Absolutely this. Women have it hard, couples have it harder, men have it hardest
Women don’t exactly have it hard; three of my solo female friends over the last three weeks are overrun with offers, and have been enjoying meets aplenty. Unless of course, by ‘hard’ you mean, hard to find time……?
OP; single guys do have it ‘hardest’ of all in here. If people do use your ethnicity as the reason to reject you, just block them and move on. They’re not worth your time. At the end of the day, if you only find one person through Fab, who you click with and share great times with, it will all have been worth it
Oh so your 3 friends define all of the women's experiences on FAB. Good to know lol"I don’t know all the solo women in Fab it’s true, but those I do know local to me, aren’t struggling for meets. Are you? | |||
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"There are prejudices. You may find it harder than non Asians and its hard enough for all men due to numbers. " 100% | |||
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"I read these topics being a man of colour and am always disappointed but not surprised at the amount of people who are quick to delegitamise an asian man's experiences on fab. My block list is full of people who specifically say 'no Asian' in the profile (like those signs they used to have up in shops in the 70s and 80s) or people who jump on these posts and state 'it's all preferences'. I'm mean that is closet racism right, because that's painting us all with the same brush. I'm mean for every Apu, there's a Riz Ahmed, after all. If you can't be understanding or have nothing to say that is positive or constructive to the OP, then just ignore the post." Attraction or lack of isn’t racism. If you don’t find certain things attractive that isn’t because you have a hate of them, you just don’t find that attractive. | |||
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"I read these topics being a man of colour and am always disappointed but not surprised at the amount of people who are quick to delegitamise an asian man's experiences on fab. My block list is full of people who specifically say 'no Asian' in the profile (like those signs they used to have up in shops in the 70s and 80s) or people who jump on these posts and state 'it's all preferences'. I'm mean that is closet racism right, because that's painting us all with the same brush. I'm mean for every Apu, there's a Riz Ahmed, after all. If you can't be understanding or have nothing to say that is positive or constructive to the OP, then just ignore the post. Attraction or lack of isn’t racism. If you don’t find certain things attractive that isn’t because you have a hate of them, you just don’t find that attractive." Food for thought!!! | |||
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"I read these topics being a man of colour and am always disappointed but not surprised at the amount of people who are quick to delegitamise an asian man's experiences on fab. My block list is full of people who specifically say 'no Asian' in the profile (like those signs they used to have up in shops in the 70s and 80s) or people who jump on these posts and state 'it's all preferences'. I'm mean that is closet racism right, because that's painting us all with the same brush. I'm mean for every Apu, there's a Riz Ahmed, after all. If you can't be understanding or have nothing to say that is positive or constructive to the OP, then just ignore the post. Attraction or lack of isn’t racism. If you don’t find certain things attractive that isn’t because you have a hate of them, you just don’t find that attractive."  | |||
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"I read these topics being a man of colour and am always disappointed but not surprised at the amount of people who are quick to delegitamise an asian man's experiences on fab. My block list is full of people who specifically say 'no Asian' in the profile (like those signs they used to have up in shops in the 70s and 80s) or people who jump on these posts and state 'it's all preferences'. I'm mean that is closet racism right, because that's painting us all with the same brush. I'm mean for every Apu, there's a Riz Ahmed, after all. If you can't be understanding or have nothing to say that is positive or constructive to the OP, then just ignore the post." Thing is, it really is just preference. I don’t find guys attractive, despite the fact that they’re all different and unique. Just not my thing, never have been and I’m not willing to try it because I don’t need want or have to. I’m sure that there are (sadly) some people out there for whom it is racial, but that doesn’t make it so for every person who expresses a preference one way or the other. | |||
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"I’d say yes it is! Or Asian men to be specific! One of my closest friends from here is an Asian male, he’s lovely but struggles on here! Most will say no it isn’t but I disagree! " I would say it probably is more difficult but I think it’s a reflection of the UK rather than fab. Most people on Fab are UK based and there are some exceedingly unfair stereotypes that still float around in certain parts of the country more than others. | |||
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"I’d say yes it is! Or Asian men to be specific! One of my closest friends from here is an Asian male, he’s lovely but struggles on here! Most will say no it isn’t but I disagree! " Facts and reality dont lie! Cheers for being honest
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"I’d say yes it is! Or Asian men to be specific! One of my closest friends from here is an Asian male, he’s lovely but struggles on here! Most will say no it isn’t but I disagree! Facts and reality dont lie! Cheers for being honest
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"I’d say yes it is! Or Asian men to be specific! One of my closest friends from here is an Asian male, he’s lovely but struggles on here! Most will say no it isn’t but I disagree! I would say it probably is more difficult but I think it’s a reflection of the UK rather than fab. Most people on Fab are UK based and there are some exceedingly unfair stereotypes that still float around in certain parts of the country more than others. " I’m not saying that the UK as a whole doesn’t do it but it definitely is more difficult for Asian males on here than say black males or white males. Part of this will be cultural stereotypes around the treatment of women in countries like Pakistan and India! I don’t necessarily think it’s a skin colour issue (many light skinned black men do not have this issue) but a cultural one. | |||
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"I’d say yes it is! Or Asian men to be specific! One of my closest friends from here is an Asian male, he’s lovely but struggles on here! Most will say no it isn’t but I disagree! I would say it probably is more difficult but I think it’s a reflection of the UK rather than fab. Most people on Fab are UK based and there are some exceedingly unfair stereotypes that still float around in certain parts of the country more than others. " Sorry mate... looks like you've have massively contradicted yourself here. Your comment to my post was basically it's preference (don't buy that - effectively saying that Asians all look the same or maybe people have a preference against brown skin) Then your second post here talks about "exceedingly unfair stereotypes" which is then based on peoples' prejudices. You can call it what you want, but there's an underlying tone here | |||
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"Having read all the thread I’d like to add my own view as a white man living in a predominantly white society. First of all, a few posts reminds me the Duboisian double consciousness concept, where someone from an ethnic minorities looks at oneself through the eyes of the citizens of the majority. As an illustration, comments like a few bad Asians created a bad reputation for Asian males show how much an Asian male must pay attention to his behaviour to not be branded with those few ‘bad’ Asians. I’d even go further by saying that as a white person I have never felt the need to be apologetic for the bad behaviour of my fellow white citizens, because the one who behaved badly are usually categorised through mental illness terms, never through the culture they are belonging in (unless it is rich white against poor white, ‘classism’) As a white person, I have the privilege of never having to live this double consciousness on a daily basis. To paraphrase Edward Said: what matters, here, is that Asians speak through and by virtue of the majority imagination of them. The subjective perspective on objective reality plays a huge role in why Asian male struggle on here. States differently, the imaginative value we attach and feel about something seems to be much more important than the reality of those things. Furthermore, I am not able to understand how it feels to be solemnly rejected for your skin colour. I can ‘understand’ to a certain extent but not entirely. Consequently, I find the comments from ppl who comes from a privileged place or a place where they do not have to face it, or even apologise for the behaviour quite amusing. But again it is a colonial mentality. Where some Whites need to even tell minorities how they should feel and respond to racism. Or explain to them that it is not racism but they way they are coming across. As also stated people have the freedom of choice and have freedom of speech to voice it. Yet the ones who are at the opposite end have the same rights. They don’t want to have their feelings negated because it is uncomfortable for you to hear them from your privileged position. " agreed | |||
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"Having read all the thread I’d like to add my own view as a white man living in a predominantly white society. First of all, a few posts reminds me the Duboisian double consciousness concept, where someone from an ethnic minorities looks at oneself through the eyes of the citizens of the majority. As an illustration, comments like a few bad Asians created a bad reputation for Asian males show how much an Asian male must pay attention to his behaviour to not be branded with those few ‘bad’ Asians. I’d even go further by saying that as a white person I have never felt the need to be apologetic for the bad behaviour of my fellow white citizens, because the one who behaved badly are usually categorised through mental illness terms, never through the culture they are belonging in (unless it is rich white against poor white, ‘classism’) As a white person, I have the privilege of never having to live this double consciousness on a daily basis. To paraphrase Edward Said: what matters, here, is that Asians speak through and by virtue of the majority imagination of them. The subjective perspective on objective reality plays a huge role in why Asian male struggle on here. States differently, the imaginative value we attach and feel about something seems to be much more important than the reality of those things. Furthermore, I am not able to understand how it feels to be solemnly rejected for your skin colour. I can ‘understand’ to a certain extent but not entirely. Consequently, I find the comments from ppl who comes from a privileged place or a place where they do not have to face it, or even apologise for the behaviour quite amusing. But again it is a colonial mentality. Where some Whites need to even tell minorities how they should feel and respond to racism. Or explain to them that it is not racism but they way they are coming across. As also stated people have the freedom of choice and have freedom of speech to voice it. Yet the ones who are at the opposite end have the same rights. They don’t want to have their feelings negated because it is uncomfortable for you to hear them from your privileged position. " Perfectly put! It’s a cop out to just say ‘preferences’ without examining where those preferences come from. Are those preferences steeped in racism? Or a stereotypical cultural bias? | |||
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"Having read all the thread I’d like to add my own view as a white man living in a predominantly white society. First of all, a few posts reminds me the Duboisian double consciousness concept, where someone from an ethnic minorities looks at oneself through the eyes of the citizens of the majority. As an illustration, comments like a few bad Asians created a bad reputation for Asian males show how much an Asian male must pay attention to his behaviour to not be branded with those few ‘bad’ Asians. I’d even go further by saying that as a white person I have never felt the need to be apologetic for the bad behaviour of my fellow white citizens, because the one who behaved badly are usually categorised through mental illness terms, never through the culture they are belonging in (unless it is rich white against poor white, ‘classism’) As a white person, I have the privilege of never having to live this double consciousness on a daily basis. To paraphrase Edward Said: what matters, here, is that Asians speak through and by virtue of the majority imagination of them. The subjective perspective on objective reality plays a huge role in why Asian male struggle on here. States differently, the imaginative value we attach and feel about something seems to be much more important than the reality of those things. Furthermore, I am not able to understand how it feels to be solemnly rejected for your skin colour. I can ‘understand’ to a certain extent but not entirely. Consequently, I find the comments from ppl who comes from a privileged place or a place where they do not have to face it, or even apologise for the behaviour quite amusing. But again it is a colonial mentality. Where some Whites need to even tell minorities how they should feel and respond to racism. Or explain to them that it is not racism but they way they are coming across. As also stated people have the freedom of choice and have freedom of speech to voice it. Yet the ones who are at the opposite end have the same rights. They don’t want to have their feelings negated because it is uncomfortable for you to hear them from your privileged position. Perfectly put! It’s a cop out to just say ‘preferences’ without examining where those preferences come from. Are those preferences steeped in racism? Or a stereotypical cultural bias?" Défunt cultural bias. I tried to think of any reasonable reason but I can’t find any. A pretty person is pretty not matter the skin colour. Unless the skin colour is associated with a cultural meaning. And thats where lies those preferences I believe. | |||
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"Well that all depends on the individual. I can definitely make it difficult for you by testing you on Advanced Calculus and Linear Algebra??? Go on lad. My engineer instincts are pretty strong. I'm sure we can play around Maxwell's equations as well? "Maxwell's equation: wasn't that something about, how many pounds a body can displace (read misplace)? Anyway I'd rather play with Mrs Schroedinger's pussy. | |||
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"Having read all the thread I’d like to add my own view as a white man living in a predominantly white society. First of all, a few posts reminds me the Duboisian double consciousness concept, where someone from an ethnic minorities looks at oneself through the eyes of the citizens of the majority. As an illustration, comments like a few bad Asians created a bad reputation for Asian males show how much an Asian male must pay attention to his behaviour to not be branded with those few ‘bad’ Asians. I’d even go further by saying that as a white person I have never felt the need to be apologetic for the bad behaviour of my fellow white citizens, because the one who behaved badly are usually categorised through mental illness terms, never through the culture they are belonging in (unless it is rich white against poor white, ‘classism’) As a white person, I have the privilege of never having to live this double consciousness on a daily basis. To paraphrase Edward Said: what matters, here, is that Asians speak through and by virtue of the majority imagination of them. The subjective perspective on objective reality plays a huge role in why Asian male struggle on here. States differently, the imaginative value we attach and feel about something seems to be much more important than the reality of those things. Furthermore, I am not able to understand how it feels to be solemnly rejected for your skin colour. I can ‘understand’ to a certain extent but not entirely. Consequently, I find the comments from ppl who comes from a privileged place or a place where they do not have to face it, or even apologise for the behaviour quite amusing. But again it is a colonial mentality. Where some Whites need to even tell minorities how they should feel and respond to racism. Or explain to them that it is not racism but they way they are coming across. As also stated people have the freedom of choice and have freedom of speech to voice it. Yet the ones who are at the opposite end have the same rights. They don’t want to have their feelings negated because it is uncomfortable for you to hear them from your privileged position. Perfectly put! It’s a cop out to just say ‘preferences’ without examining where those preferences come from. Are those preferences steeped in racism? Or a stereotypical cultural bias? Défunt cultural bias. I tried to think of any reasonable reason but I can’t find any. A pretty person is pretty not matter the skin colour. Unless the skin colour is associated with a cultural meaning. And thats where lies those preferences I believe. " Interestingly some of the same people who say no Asians will meet light-skinned black men and in terms of skin tone there isn’t a lot of difference! I’m mixed race black but often get mistaken for Indian or Pakistani! So it has to be cultural stereotyping! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Having read all the thread I’d like to add my own view as a white man living in a predominantly white society. First of all, a few posts reminds me the Duboisian double consciousness concept, where someone from an ethnic minorities looks at oneself through the eyes of the citizens of the majority. As an illustration, comments like a few bad Asians created a bad reputation for Asian males show how much an Asian male must pay attention to his behaviour to not be branded with those few ‘bad’ Asians. I’d even go further by saying that as a white person I have never felt the need to be apologetic for the bad behaviour of my fellow white citizens, because the one who behaved badly are usually categorised through mental illness terms, never through the culture they are belonging in (unless it is rich white against poor white, ‘classism’) As a white person, I have the privilege of never having to live this double consciousness on a daily basis. To paraphrase Edward Said: what matters, here, is that Asians speak through and by virtue of the majority imagination of them. The subjective perspective on objective reality plays a huge role in why Asian male struggle on here. States differently, the imaginative value we attach and feel about something seems to be much more important than the reality of those things. Furthermore, I am not able to understand how it feels to be solemnly rejected for your skin colour. I can ‘understand’ to a certain extent but not entirely. Consequently, I find the comments from ppl who comes from a privileged place or a place where they do not have to face it, or even apologise for the behaviour quite amusing. But again it is a colonial mentality. Where some Whites need to even tell minorities how they should feel and respond to racism. Or explain to them that it is not racism but they way they are coming across. As also stated people have the freedom of choice and have freedom of speech to voice it. Yet the ones who are at the opposite end have the same rights. They don’t want to have their feelings negated because it is uncomfortable for you to hear them from your privileged position. Perfectly put! It’s a cop out to just say ‘preferences’ without examining where those preferences come from. Are those preferences steeped in racism? Or a stereotypical cultural bias? Défunt cultural bias. I tried to think of any reasonable reason but I can’t find any. A pretty person is pretty not matter the skin colour. Unless the skin colour is associated with a cultural meaning. And thats where lies those preferences I believe. Interestingly some of the same people who say no Asians will meet light-skinned black men and in terms of skin tone there isn’t a lot of difference! I’m mixed race black but often get mistaken for Indian or Pakistani! So it has to be cultural stereotyping! " And that’s why you don’t see it on male profile that often too. Well actually I have never ever come across it since my time on here. And I believe that must be Because Women are often seen as a winning trophy, and even if some men are racists, fucking the women from the ethnicity they don’t like, it is like branding a trophy. ‘Your women’ prefer fucking me. | |||
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"Having read all the thread I’d like to add my own view as a white man living in a predominantly white society. First of all, a few posts reminds me the Duboisian double consciousness concept, where someone from an ethnic minorities looks at oneself through the eyes of the citizens of the majority. As an illustration, comments like a few bad Asians created a bad reputation for Asian males show how much an Asian male must pay attention to his behaviour to not be branded with those few ‘bad’ Asians. I’d even go further by saying that as a white person I have never felt the need to be apologetic for the bad behaviour of my fellow white citizens, because the one who behaved badly are usually categorised through mental illness terms, never through the culture they are belonging in (unless it is rich white against poor white, ‘classism’) As a white person, I have the privilege of never having to live this double consciousness on a daily basis. To paraphrase Edward Said: what matters, here, is that Asians speak through and by virtue of the majority imagination of them. The subjective perspective on objective reality plays a huge role in why Asian male struggle on here. States differently, the imaginative value we attach and feel about something seems to be much more important than the reality of those things. Furthermore, I am not able to understand how it feels to be solemnly rejected for your skin colour. I can ‘understand’ to a certain extent but not entirely. Consequently, I find the comments from ppl who comes from a privileged place or a place where they do not have to face it, or even apologise for the behaviour quite amusing. But again it is a colonial mentality. Where some Whites need to even tell minorities how they should feel and respond to racism. Or explain to them that it is not racism but they way they are coming across. As also stated people have the freedom of choice and have freedom of speech to voice it. Yet the ones who are at the opposite end have the same rights. They don’t want to have their feelings negated because it is uncomfortable for you to hear them from your privileged position. " When I said freedom of choice I meant it. I meant that everyone has this same freedom, the OP that posted this thread and all those that have posted. You say that those at the opposite ends don't want to have their feelings negated just because people are uncomfortable for them to hear because of their privileged position, is very presumptuous on your behalf. Firstly your supposition that the 'opposite end' don't want their feelings negated because of this power balance does not allow for the true use of a forum, the ebb and flow of often contrasting ideas. If you post on a forum you should not only hope for affirmation but also expect opposing views. Secondly, that fact that people don't want to negate anyone's feelings because of their privilege position is extremely prejudicial. You have no knowledge of the majority of users backgrounds on here. Being brought up in the 60's and 70's, in abject poverty, on the slums of Scottie Road, I know I certainly not in a privileged position. There were no special opportunities available for me or anyone where I grew up. We just had the 3 day week, winter of discontent and mass unemployment and huge recession of the 80's, to name a few, to look forward too. I can only assume that the 'privileged position' you talk of is based upon the colour of my skin. Isn't that as racist preposition? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Having read all the thread I’d like to add my own view as a white man living in a predominantly white society. First of all, a few posts reminds me the Duboisian double consciousness concept, where someone from an ethnic minorities looks at oneself through the eyes of the citizens of the majority. As an illustration, comments like a few bad Asians created a bad reputation for Asian males show how much an Asian male must pay attention to his behaviour to not be branded with those few ‘bad’ Asians. I’d even go further by saying that as a white person I have never felt the need to be apologetic for the bad behaviour of my fellow white citizens, because the one who behaved badly are usually categorised through mental illness terms, never through the culture they are belonging in (unless it is rich white against poor white, ‘classism’) As a white person, I have the privilege of never having to live this double consciousness on a daily basis. To paraphrase Edward Said: what matters, here, is that Asians speak through and by virtue of the majority imagination of them. The subjective perspective on objective reality plays a huge role in why Asian male struggle on here. States differently, the imaginative value we attach and feel about something seems to be much more important than the reality of those things. Furthermore, I am not able to understand how it feels to be solemnly rejected for your skin colour. I can ‘understand’ to a certain extent but not entirely. Consequently, I find the comments from ppl who comes from a privileged place or a place where they do not have to face it, or even apologise for the behaviour quite amusing. But again it is a colonial mentality. Where some Whites need to even tell minorities how they should feel and respond to racism. Or explain to them that it is not racism but they way they are coming across. As also stated people have the freedom of choice and have freedom of speech to voice it. Yet the ones who are at the opposite end have the same rights. They don’t want to have their feelings negated because it is uncomfortable for you to hear them from your privileged position. When I said freedom of choice I meant it. I meant that everyone has this same freedom, the OP that posted this thread and all those that have posted. You say that those at the opposite ends don't want to have their feelings negated just because people are uncomfortable for them to hear because of their privileged position, is very presumptuous on your behalf. Firstly your supposition that the 'opposite end' don't want their feelings negated because of this power balance does not allow for the true use of a forum, the ebb and flow of often contrasting ideas. If you post on a forum you should not only hope for affirmation but also expect opposing views. Secondly, that fact that people don't want to negate anyone's feelings because of their privilege position is extremely prejudicial. You have no knowledge of the majority of users backgrounds on here. Being brought up in the 60's and 70's, in abject poverty, on the slums of Scottie Road, I know I certainly not in a privileged position. There were no special opportunities available for me or anyone where I grew up. We just had the 3 day week, winter of discontent and mass unemployment and huge recession of the 80's, to name a few, to look forward too. I can only assume that the 'privileged position' you talk of is based upon the colour of my skin. Isn't that as racist preposition?" Yes but as I am white it isn’t racism love. 
But I was not referring particularly to your post, as you posted between me commenting a first time and commenting another time so I haven’t read yours before. But I’ll reply.
It may seem presumptuous from your side, but it is my observation on mine. Everything is down to perspective as stated.
I totally agree with you on the content of the forums and wasn’t particularly looking for confirmation of what I have said. It my own observation and they may look untrue to you.
Yet there is a way to challenge topics (again not referring to you particularly) especially if you do not personally experience the issue debated on s regular basis. Cause there is a huge difference between racial prejudice and systemic racism, which I believe the latter fits what it is described there.
And if you read my post , I have actually talked about the latter issue you are raising through Classism.
Racism and classism go hand in hand I believe. | |||
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"I go on the person and not where their grandparents might have come from " | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Having read all the thread I’d like to add my own view as a white man living in a predominantly white society. First of all, a few posts reminds me the Duboisian double consciousness concept, where someone from an ethnic minorities looks at oneself through the eyes of the citizens of the majority. As an illustration, comments like a few bad Asians created a bad reputation for Asian males show how much an Asian male must pay attention to his behaviour to not be branded with those few ‘bad’ Asians. I’d even go further by saying that as a white person I have never felt the need to be apologetic for the bad behaviour of my fellow white citizens, because the one who behaved badly are usually categorised through mental illness terms, never through the culture they are belonging in (unless it is rich white against poor white, ‘classism’) As a white person, I have the privilege of never having to live this double consciousness on a daily basis. To paraphrase Edward Said: what matters, here, is that Asians speak through and by virtue of the majority imagination of them. The subjective perspective on objective reality plays a huge role in why Asian male struggle on here. States differently, the imaginative value we attach and feel about something seems to be much more important than the reality of those things. Furthermore, I am not able to understand how it feels to be solemnly rejected for your skin colour. I can ‘understand’ to a certain extent but not entirely. Consequently, I find the comments from ppl who comes from a privileged place or a place where they do not have to face it, or even apologise for the behaviour quite amusing. But again it is a colonial mentality. Where some Whites need to even tell minorities how they should feel and respond to racism. Or explain to them that it is not racism but they way they are coming across. As also stated people have the freedom of choice and have freedom of speech to voice it. Yet the ones who are at the opposite end have the same rights. They don’t want to have their feelings negated because it is uncomfortable for you to hear them from your privileged position. When I said freedom of choice I meant it. I meant that everyone has this same freedom, the OP that posted this thread and all those that have posted. You say that those at the opposite ends don't want to have their feelings negated just because people are uncomfortable for them to hear because of their privileged position, is very presumptuous on your behalf. Firstly your supposition that the 'opposite end' don't want their feelings negated because of this power balance does not allow for the true use of a forum, the ebb and flow of often contrasting ideas. If you post on a forum you should not only hope for affirmation but also expect opposing views. Secondly, that fact that people don't want to negate anyone's feelings because of their privilege position is extremely prejudicial. You have no knowledge of the majority of users backgrounds on here. Being brought up in the 60's and 70's, in abject poverty, on the slums of Scottie Road, I know I certainly not in a privileged position. There were no special opportunities available for me or anyone where I grew up. We just had the 3 day week, winter of discontent and mass unemployment and huge recession of the 80's, to name a few, to look forward too. I can only assume that the 'privileged position' you talk of is based upon the colour of my skin. Isn't that as racist preposition? Yes but as I am white it isn’t racism love.
But I was not referring particularly to your post, as you posted between me commenting a first time and commenting another time so I haven’t read yours before. But I’ll reply.
It may seem presumptuous from your side, but it is my observation on mine. Everything is down to perspective as stated.
I totally agree with you on the content of the forums and wasn’t particularly looking for confirmation of what I have said. It my own observation and they may look untrue to you.
Yet there is a way to challenge topics (again not referring to you particularly) especially if you do not personally experience the issue debated on s regular basis. Cause there is a huge difference between racial prejudice and systemic racism, which I believe the latter fits what it is described there.
And if you read my post , I have actually talked about the latter issue you are raising through Classism.
Racism and classism go hand in hand I believe. "So you are saying a comment cannot be racist if it's said by a person of the same colour? So it's not racist when Indians or Pakistani's abuse each other, or when genocide has occured on the African continent between warring tribes of the same colour, I would therefore disagree, love. I do not think that's it is always racial when stating a preference but you obviously do and you are entitled to say so. I can see where you are coming from as on your profile you state that you don't agree with anyone posting no black or no Asian even though they may have black or Asian friends. So do you think you should have fun with all your friends, even though you don't find them attractive? Does this also apply to my husband's choice of not meeting gay men for fear of being homophobic, despite my brother and a lot of his friends being gay and we love him to bits. The op asked if it was more difficult on here for Asian men. I don't agree, I think it's much harder for all men. I think it comes down to the quality of profiles and a guys marketing skills. There is someone for everyone, just don't give up. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Having read all the thread I’d like to add my own view as a white man living in a predominantly white society. First of all, a few posts reminds me the Duboisian double consciousness concept, where someone from an ethnic minorities looks at oneself through the eyes of the citizens of the majority. As an illustration, comments like a few bad Asians created a bad reputation for Asian males show how much an Asian male must pay attention to his behaviour to not be branded with those few ‘bad’ Asians. I’d even go further by saying that as a white person I have never felt the need to be apologetic for the bad behaviour of my fellow white citizens, because the one who behaved badly are usually categorised through mental illness terms, never through the culture they are belonging in (unless it is rich white against poor white, ‘classism’) As a white person, I have the privilege of never having to live this double consciousness on a daily basis. To paraphrase Edward Said: what matters, here, is that Asians speak through and by virtue of the majority imagination of them. The subjective perspective on objective reality plays a huge role in why Asian male struggle on here. States differently, the imaginative value we attach and feel about something seems to be much more important than the reality of those things. Furthermore, I am not able to understand how it feels to be solemnly rejected for your skin colour. I can ‘understand’ to a certain extent but not entirely. Consequently, I find the comments from ppl who comes from a privileged place or a place where they do not have to face it, or even apologise for the behaviour quite amusing. But again it is a colonial mentality. Where some Whites need to even tell minorities how they should feel and respond to racism. Or explain to them that it is not racism but they way they are coming across. As also stated people have the freedom of choice and have freedom of speech to voice it. Yet the ones who are at the opposite end have the same rights. They don’t want to have their feelings negated because it is uncomfortable for you to hear them from your privileged position. When I said freedom of choice I meant it. I meant that everyone has this same freedom, the OP that posted this thread and all those that have posted. You say that those at the opposite ends don't want to have their feelings negated just because people are uncomfortable for them to hear because of their privileged position, is very presumptuous on your behalf. Firstly your supposition that the 'opposite end' don't want their feelings negated because of this power balance does not allow for the true use of a forum, the ebb and flow of often contrasting ideas. If you post on a forum you should not only hope for affirmation but also expect opposing views. Secondly, that fact that people don't want to negate anyone's feelings because of their privilege position is extremely prejudicial. You have no knowledge of the majority of users backgrounds on here. Being brought up in the 60's and 70's, in abject poverty, on the slums of Scottie Road, I know I certainly not in a privileged position. There were no special opportunities available for me or anyone where I grew up. We just had the 3 day week, winter of discontent and mass unemployment and huge recession of the 80's, to name a few, to look forward too. I can only assume that the 'privileged position' you talk of is based upon the colour of my skin. Isn't that as racist preposition? Yes but as I am white it isn’t racism love.
But I was not referring particularly to your post, as you posted between me commenting a first time and commenting another time so I haven’t read yours before. But I’ll reply.
It may seem presumptuous from your side, but it is my observation on mine. Everything is down to perspective as stated.
I totally agree with you on the content of the forums and wasn’t particularly looking for confirmation of what I have said. It my own observation and they may look untrue to you.
Yet there is a way to challenge topics (again not referring to you particularly) especially if you do not personally experience the issue debated on s regular basis. Cause there is a huge difference between racial prejudice and systemic racism, which I believe the latter fits what it is described there.
And if you read my post , I have actually talked about the latter issue you are raising through Classism.
Racism and classism go hand in hand I believe.
So you are saying a comment cannot be racist if it's said by a person of the same colour? So it's not racist when Indians or Pakistani's abuse each other, or when genocide has occured on the African continent between warring tribes of the same colour, I would therefore disagree, love.
I do not think that's it is always racial when stating a preference but you obviously do and you are entitled to say so.
I can see where you are coming from as on your profile you state that you don't agree with anyone posting no black or no Asian even though they may have black or Asian friends. So do you think you should have fun with all your friends, even though you don't find them attractive?
Does this also apply to my husband's choice of not meeting gay men for fear of being homophobic, despite my brother and a lot of his friends being gay and we love him to bits.
The op asked if it was more difficult on here for Asian men. I don't agree, I think it's much harder for all men.
I think it comes down to the quality of profiles and a guys marketing skills.
There is someone for everyone, just don't give up.
"That is exactly my point. You can’t be attracted to everyone and anyone, but stated that you aren’t attracted to an entire ethnicity is ambiguous in my opinion. And must stems from the social perspective you associate with that ethnicity (you generally speaking not you in particular as I don’t know you). I don’t sleep with all my friends but I wouldn’t mind sleeping with the ones I find attractive and this regardless of their ethnicities. Well it may be homophonic depending on the words he used to state it. I am not sexually intimate with other men but I don’t feel the need to state that on my profile to assert my heterosexuality. And you don’t agree because you aren’t an Asian man who deals with that on a regular basis. That’s exactly what I was pointing. Look I’ll stop there because it is becoming tedious and I don’t want to say things that may upset you or myself. Peace out I have stated my thoughts as clearly as I could. | |||
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"No its not. It's difficult for all men due to the ratio of men to women. " Accurate | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. " I don't know, is it?  | |||
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"Having read all the thread I’d like to add my own view as a white man living in a predominantly white society. First of all, a few posts reminds me the Duboisian double consciousness concept, where someone from an ethnic minorities looks at oneself through the eyes of the citizens of the majority. As an illustration, comments like a few bad Asians created a bad reputation for Asian males show how much an Asian male must pay attention to his behaviour to not be branded with those few ‘bad’ Asians. I’d even go further by saying that as a white person I have never felt the need to be apologetic for the bad behaviour of my fellow white citizens, because the one who behaved badly are usually categorised through mental illness terms, never through the culture they are belonging in (unless it is rich white against poor white, ‘classism’) As a white person, I have the privilege of never having to live this double consciousness on a daily basis. To paraphrase Edward Said: what matters, here, is that Asians speak through and by virtue of the majority imagination of them. The subjective perspective on objective reality plays a huge role in why Asian male struggle on here. States differently, the imaginative value we attach and feel about something seems to be much more important than the reality of those things. Furthermore, I am not able to understand how it feels to be solemnly rejected for your skin colour. I can ‘understand’ to a certain extent but not entirely. Consequently, I find the comments from ppl who comes from a privileged place or a place where they do not have to face it, or even apologise for the behaviour quite amusing. But again it is a colonial mentality. Where some Whites need to even tell minorities how they should feel and respond to racism. Or explain to them that it is not racism but they way they are coming across. As also stated people have the freedom of choice and have freedom of speech to voice it. Yet the ones who are at the opposite end have the same rights. They don’t want to have their feelings negated because it is uncomfortable for you to hear them from your privileged position. Perfectly put! It’s a cop out to just say ‘preferences’ without examining where those preferences come from. Are those preferences steeped in racism? Or a stereotypical cultural bias?" Careful, I’ve said this for years. People don’t like feeling that they might be even influenced by racist beliefs. Because they think it’s as bad a being called a racist. Which is obviously the e worst thing in the world. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Having read all the thread I’d like to add my own view as a white man living in a predominantly white society. First of all, a few posts reminds me the Duboisian double consciousness concept, where someone from an ethnic minorities looks at oneself through the eyes of the citizens of the majority. As an illustration, comments like a few bad Asians created a bad reputation for Asian males show how much an Asian male must pay attention to his behaviour to not be branded with those few ‘bad’ Asians. I’d even go further by saying that as a white person I have never felt the need to be apologetic for the bad behaviour of my fellow white citizens, because the one who behaved badly are usually categorised through mental illness terms, never through the culture they are belonging in (unless it is rich white against poor white, ‘classism’) As a white person, I have the privilege of never having to live this double consciousness on a daily basis. To paraphrase Edward Said: what matters, here, is that Asians speak through and by virtue of the majority imagination of them. The subjective perspective on objective reality plays a huge role in why Asian male struggle on here. States differently, the imaginative value we attach and feel about something seems to be much more important than the reality of those things. Furthermore, I am not able to understand how it feels to be solemnly rejected for your skin colour. I can ‘understand’ to a certain extent but not entirely. Consequently, I find the comments from ppl who comes from a privileged place or a place where they do not have to face it, or even apologise for the behaviour quite amusing. But again it is a colonial mentality. Where some Whites need to even tell minorities how they should feel and respond to racism. Or explain to them that it is not racism but they way they are coming across. As also stated people have the freedom of choice and have freedom of speech to voice it. Yet the ones who are at the opposite end have the same rights. They don’t want to have their feelings negated because it is uncomfortable for you to hear them from your privileged position. When I said freedom of choice I meant it. I meant that everyone has this same freedom, the OP that posted this thread and all those that have posted. You say that those at the opposite ends don't want to have their feelings negated just because people are uncomfortable for them to hear because of their privileged position, is very presumptuous on your behalf. Firstly your supposition that the 'opposite end' don't want their feelings negated because of this power balance does not allow for the true use of a forum, the ebb and flow of often contrasting ideas. If you post on a forum you should not only hope for affirmation but also expect opposing views. Secondly, that fact that people don't want to negate anyone's feelings because of their privilege position is extremely prejudicial. You have no knowledge of the majority of users backgrounds on here. Being brought up in the 60's and 70's, in abject poverty, on the slums of Scottie Road, I know I certainly not in a privileged position. There were no special opportunities available for me or anyone where I grew up. We just had the 3 day week, winter of discontent and mass unemployment and huge recession of the 80's, to name a few, to look forward too. I can only assume that the 'privileged position' you talk of is based upon the colour of my skin. Isn't that as racist preposition? Yes but as I am white it isn’t racism love.
But I was not referring particularly to your post, as you posted between me commenting a first time and commenting another time so I haven’t read yours before. But I’ll reply.
It may seem presumptuous from your side, but it is my observation on mine. Everything is down to perspective as stated.
I totally agree with you on the content of the forums and wasn’t particularly looking for confirmation of what I have said. It my own observation and they may look untrue to you.
Yet there is a way to challenge topics (again not referring to you particularly) especially if you do not personally experience the issue debated on s regular basis. Cause there is a huge difference between racial prejudice and systemic racism, which I believe the latter fits what it is described there.
And if you read my post , I have actually talked about the latter issue you are raising through Classism.
Racism and classism go hand in hand I believe.
So you are saying a comment cannot be racist if it's said by a person of the same colour? So it's not racist when Indians or Pakistani's abuse each other, or when genocide has occured on the African continent between warring tribes of the same colour, I would therefore disagree, love.
I do not think that's it is always racial when stating a preference but you obviously do and you are entitled to say so.
I can see where you are coming from as on your profile you state that you don't agree with anyone posting no black or no Asian even though they may have black or Asian friends. So do you think you should have fun with all your friends, even though you don't find them attractive?
Does this also apply to my husband's choice of not meeting gay men for fear of being homophobic, despite my brother and a lot of his friends being gay and we love him to bits.
The op asked if it was more difficult on here for Asian men. I don't agree, I think it's much harder for all men.
I think it comes down to the quality of profiles and a guys marketing skills.
There is someone for everyone, just don't give up.
That is exactly my point. You can’t be attracted to everyone and anyone, but stated that you aren’t attracted to an entire ethnicity is ambiguous in my opinion. And must stems from the social perspective you associate with that ethnicity (you generally speaking not you in particular as I don’t know you). I don’t sleep with all my friends but I wouldn’t mind sleeping with the ones I find attractive and this regardless of their ethnicities.
Well it may be homophonic depending on the words he used to state it. I am not sexually intimate with other men but I don’t feel the need to state that on my profile to assert my heterosexuality.
And you don’t agree because you aren’t an Asian man who deals with that on a regular basis. That’s exactly what I was pointing.
Look I’ll stop there because it is becoming tedious and I don’t want to say things that may upset you or myself.
Peace out
I have stated my thoughts as clearly as I could.
"and you've hit the nail on the head | |||
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"I've said this before Asia is a massive continent and not just to countries. So which nationalities within this continent, are people talking about here? US: the Orient UK: the Sub continent. (typical lazy BBC Radio) " I was thinking along the same lines. I rarely see oriental people on here to be honest. Or maybe I'm just looking in the wrong places. | |||
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"Having read all the thread I’d like to add my own view as a white man living in a predominantly white society. First of all, a few posts reminds me the Duboisian double consciousness concept, where someone from an ethnic minorities looks at oneself through the eyes of the citizens of the majority. As an illustration, comments like a few bad Asians created a bad reputation for Asian males show how much an Asian male must pay attention to his behaviour to not be branded with those few ‘bad’ Asians. I’d even go further by saying that as a white person I have never felt the need to be apologetic for the bad behaviour of my fellow white citizens, because the one who behaved badly are usually categorised through mental illness terms, never through the culture they are belonging in (unless it is rich white against poor white, ‘classism’) As a white person, I have the privilege of never having to live this double consciousness on a daily basis. To paraphrase Edward Said: what matters, here, is that Asians speak through and by virtue of the majority imagination of them. The subjective perspective on objective reality plays a huge role in why Asian male struggle on here. States differently, the imaginative value we attach and feel about something seems to be much more important than the reality of those things. Furthermore, I am not able to understand how it feels to be solemnly rejected for your skin colour. I can ‘understand’ to a certain extent but not entirely. Consequently, I find the comments from ppl who comes from a privileged place or a place where they do not have to face it, or even apologise for the behaviour quite amusing. But again it is a colonial mentality. Where some Whites need to even tell minorities how they should feel and respond to racism. Or explain to them that it is not racism but they way they are coming across. As also stated people have the freedom of choice and have freedom of speech to voice it. Yet the ones who are at the opposite end have the same rights. They don’t want to have their feelings negated because it is uncomfortable for you to hear them from your privileged position. Perfectly put! It’s a cop out to just say ‘preferences’ without examining where those preferences come from. Are those preferences steeped in racism? Or a stereotypical cultural bias? Défunt cultural bias. I tried to think of any reasonable reason but I can’t find any. A pretty person is pretty not matter the skin colour. Unless the skin colour is associated with a cultural meaning. And thats where lies those preferences I believe. Interestingly some of the same people who say no Asians will meet light-skinned black men and in terms of skin tone there isn’t a lot of difference! I’m mixed race black but often get mistaken for Indian or Pakistani! So it has to be cultural stereotyping! And that’s why you don’t see it on male profile that often too. Well actually I have never ever come across it since my time on here. And I believe that must be Because Women are often seen as a winning trophy, and even if some men are racists, fucking the women from the ethnicity they don’t like, it is like branding a trophy. ‘Your women’ prefer fucking me. " And this is why alot of woc won't touch white men cause too many of them are weird when it comes to dealing with us as if it's something to brag or be proud of | |||
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"Having read all the thread I’d like to add my own view as a white man living in a predominantly white society. First of all, a few posts reminds me the Duboisian double consciousness concept, where someone from an ethnic minorities looks at oneself through the eyes of the citizens of the majority. As an illustration, comments like a few bad Asians created a bad reputation for Asian males show how much an Asian male must pay attention to his behaviour to not be branded with those few ‘bad’ Asians. I’d even go further by saying that as a white person I have never felt the need to be apologetic for the bad behaviour of my fellow white citizens, because the one who behaved badly are usually categorised through mental illness terms, never through the culture they are belonging in (unless it is rich white against poor white, ‘classism’) As a white person, I have the privilege of never having to live this double consciousness on a daily basis. To paraphrase Edward Said: what matters, here, is that Asians speak through and by virtue of the majority imagination of them. The subjective perspective on objective reality plays a huge role in why Asian male struggle on here. States differently, the imaginative value we attach and feel about something seems to be much more important than the reality of those things. Furthermore, I am not able to understand how it feels to be solemnly rejected for your skin colour. I can ‘understand’ to a certain extent but not entirely. Consequently, I find the comments from ppl who comes from a privileged place or a place where they do not have to face it, or even apologise for the behaviour quite amusing. But again it is a colonial mentality. Where some Whites need to even tell minorities how they should feel and respond to racism. Or explain to them that it is not racism but they way they are coming across. As also stated people have the freedom of choice and have freedom of speech to voice it. Yet the ones who are at the opposite end have the same rights. They don’t want to have their feelings negated because it is uncomfortable for you to hear them from your privileged position. Perfectly put! It’s a cop out to just say ‘preferences’ without examining where those preferences come from. Are those preferences steeped in racism? Or a stereotypical cultural bias? Défunt cultural bias. I tried to think of any reasonable reason but I can’t find any. A pretty person is pretty not matter the skin colour. Unless the skin colour is associated with a cultural meaning. And thats where lies those preferences I believe. Interestingly some of the same people who say no Asians will meet light-skinned black men and in terms of skin tone there isn’t a lot of difference! I’m mixed race black but often get mistaken for Indian or Pakistani! So it has to be cultural stereotyping! And that’s why you don’t see it on male profile that often too. Well actually I have never ever come across it since my time on here. And I believe that must be Because Women are often seen as a winning trophy, and even if some men are racists, fucking the women from the ethnicity they don’t like, it is like branding a trophy. ‘Your women’ prefer fucking me. And this is why alot of woc won't touch white men cause too many of them are weird when it comes to dealing with us as if it's something to brag or be proud of" Classic examples of non-people of colour speaking for all people of colour... really don't know how qualified you guys are in speaking for us but you always seem to love living our experience In my experience of looking at 'woc' profiles, I've actually found quite a few 'woc' having 'no asians' on their profiles. | |||
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"Having read all the thread I’d like to add my own view as a white man living in a predominantly white society. First of all, a few posts reminds me the Duboisian double consciousness concept, where someone from an ethnic minorities looks at oneself through the eyes of the citizens of the majority. As an illustration, comments like a few bad Asians created a bad reputation for Asian males show how much an Asian male must pay attention to his behaviour to not be branded with those few ‘bad’ Asians. I’d even go further by saying that as a white person I have never felt the need to be apologetic for the bad behaviour of my fellow white citizens, because the one who behaved badly are usually categorised through mental illness terms, never through the culture they are belonging in (unless it is rich white against poor white, ‘classism’) As a white person, I have the privilege of never having to live this double consciousness on a daily basis. To paraphrase Edward Said: what matters, here, is that Asians speak through and by virtue of the majority imagination of them. The subjective perspective on objective reality plays a huge role in why Asian male struggle on here. States differently, the imaginative value we attach and feel about something seems to be much more important than the reality of those things. Furthermore, I am not able to understand how it feels to be solemnly rejected for your skin colour. I can ‘understand’ to a certain extent but not entirely. Consequently, I find the comments from ppl who comes from a privileged place or a place where they do not have to face it, or even apologise for the behaviour quite amusing. But again it is a colonial mentality. Where some Whites need to even tell minorities how they should feel and respond to racism. Or explain to them that it is not racism but they way they are coming across. As also stated people have the freedom of choice and have freedom of speech to voice it. Yet the ones who are at the opposite end have the same rights. They don’t want to have their feelings negated because it is uncomfortable for you to hear them from your privileged position. Perfectly put! It’s a cop out to just say ‘preferences’ without examining where those preferences come from. Are those preferences steeped in racism? Or a stereotypical cultural bias? Défunt cultural bias. I tried to think of any reasonable reason but I can’t find any. A pretty person is pretty not matter the skin colour. Unless the skin colour is associated with a cultural meaning. And thats where lies those preferences I believe. Interestingly some of the same people who say no Asians will meet light-skinned black men and in terms of skin tone there isn’t a lot of difference! I’m mixed race black but often get mistaken for Indian or Pakistani! So it has to be cultural stereotyping! And that’s why you don’t see it on male profile that often too. Well actually I have never ever come across it since my time on here. And I believe that must be Because Women are often seen as a winning trophy, and even if some men are racists, fucking the women from the ethnicity they don’t like, it is like branding a trophy. ‘Your women’ prefer fucking me. And this is why alot of woc won't touch white men cause too many of them are weird when it comes to dealing with us as if it's something to brag or be proud of Classic examples of non-people of colour speaking for all people of colour... really don't know how qualified you guys are in speaking for us but you always seem to love living our experience In my experience of looking at 'woc' profiles, I've actually found quite a few 'woc' having 'no asians' on their profiles. " The last paragraph you are quoting was written by a woc I think x | |||
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"Having read all the thread I’d like to add my own view as a white man living in a predominantly white society. First of all, a few posts reminds me the Duboisian double consciousness concept, where someone from an ethnic minorities looks at oneself through the eyes of the citizens of the majority. As an illustration, comments like a few bad Asians created a bad reputation for Asian males show how much an Asian male must pay attention to his behaviour to not be branded with those few ‘bad’ Asians. I’d even go further by saying that as a white person I have never felt the need to be apologetic for the bad behaviour of my fellow white citizens, because the one who behaved badly are usually categorised through mental illness terms, never through the culture they are belonging in (unless it is rich white against poor white, ‘classism’) As a white person, I have the privilege of never having to live this double consciousness on a daily basis. To paraphrase Edward Said: what matters, here, is that Asians speak through and by virtue of the majority imagination of them. The subjective perspective on objective reality plays a huge role in why Asian male struggle on here. States differently, the imaginative value we attach and feel about something seems to be much more important than the reality of those things. Furthermore, I am not able to understand how it feels to be solemnly rejected for your skin colour. I can ‘understand’ to a certain extent but not entirely. Consequently, I find the comments from ppl who comes from a privileged place or a place where they do not have to face it, or even apologise for the behaviour quite amusing. But again it is a colonial mentality. Where some Whites need to even tell minorities how they should feel and respond to racism. Or explain to them that it is not racism but they way they are coming across. As also stated people have the freedom of choice and have freedom of speech to voice it. Yet the ones who are at the opposite end have the same rights. They don’t want to have their feelings negated because it is uncomfortable for you to hear them from your privileged position. Perfectly put! It’s a cop out to just say ‘preferences’ without examining where those preferences come from. Are those preferences steeped in racism? Or a stereotypical cultural bias? Défunt cultural bias. I tried to think of any reasonable reason but I can’t find any. A pretty person is pretty not matter the skin colour. Unless the skin colour is associated with a cultural meaning. And thats where lies those preferences I believe. Interestingly some of the same people who say no Asians will meet light-skinned black men and in terms of skin tone there isn’t a lot of difference! I’m mixed race black but often get mistaken for Indian or Pakistani! So it has to be cultural stereotyping! And that’s why you don’t see it on male profile that often too. Well actually I have never ever come across it since my time on here. And I believe that must be Because Women are often seen as a winning trophy, and even if some men are racists, fucking the women from the ethnicity they don’t like, it is like branding a trophy. ‘Your women’ prefer fucking me. And this is why alot of woc won't touch white men cause too many of them are weird when it comes to dealing with us as if it's something to brag or be proud of Classic examples of non-people of colour speaking for all people of colour... really don't know how qualified you guys are in speaking for us but you always seem to love living our experience In my experience of looking at 'woc' profiles, I've actually found quite a few 'woc' having 'no asians' on their profiles. The last paragraph you are quoting was written by a woc I think x" I know... not sure how my point is not valid as I'm speaking from my own personal experience being a man of colour | |||
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"Having read all the thread I’d like to add my own view as a white man living in a predominantly white society. First of all, a few posts reminds me the Duboisian double consciousness concept, where someone from an ethnic minorities looks at oneself through the eyes of the citizens of the majority. As an illustration, comments like a few bad Asians created a bad reputation for Asian males show how much an Asian male must pay attention to his behaviour to not be branded with those few ‘bad’ Asians. I’d even go further by saying that as a white person I have never felt the need to be apologetic for the bad behaviour of my fellow white citizens, because the one who behaved badly are usually categorised through mental illness terms, never through the culture they are belonging in (unless it is rich white against poor white, ‘classism’) As a white person, I have the privilege of never having to live this double consciousness on a daily basis. To paraphrase Edward Said: what matters, here, is that Asians speak through and by virtue of the majority imagination of them. The subjective perspective on objective reality plays a huge role in why Asian male struggle on here. States differently, the imaginative value we attach and feel about something seems to be much more important than the reality of those things. Furthermore, I am not able to understand how it feels to be solemnly rejected for your skin colour. I can ‘understand’ to a certain extent but not entirely. Consequently, I find the comments from ppl who comes from a privileged place or a place where they do not have to face it, or even apologise for the behaviour quite amusing. But again it is a colonial mentality. Where some Whites need to even tell minorities how they should feel and respond to racism. Or explain to them that it is not racism but they way they are coming across. As also stated people have the freedom of choice and have freedom of speech to voice it. Yet the ones who are at the opposite end have the same rights. They don’t want to have their feelings negated because it is uncomfortable for you to hear them from your privileged position. Perfectly put! It’s a cop out to just say ‘preferences’ without examining where those preferences come from. Are those preferences steeped in racism? Or a stereotypical cultural bias? Défunt cultural bias. I tried to think of any reasonable reason but I can’t find any. A pretty person is pretty not matter the skin colour. Unless the skin colour is associated with a cultural meaning. And thats where lies those preferences I believe. Interestingly some of the same people who say no Asians will meet light-skinned black men and in terms of skin tone there isn’t a lot of difference! I’m mixed race black but often get mistaken for Indian or Pakistani! So it has to be cultural stereotyping! And that’s why you don’t see it on male profile that often too. Well actually I have never ever come across it since my time on here. And I believe that must be Because Women are often seen as a winning trophy, and even if some men are racists, fucking the women from the ethnicity they don’t like, it is like branding a trophy. ‘Your women’ prefer fucking me. And this is why alot of woc won't touch white men cause too many of them are weird when it comes to dealing with us as if it's something to brag or be proud of Classic examples of non-people of colour speaking for all people of colour... really don't know how qualified you guys are in speaking for us but you always seem to love living our experience In my experience of looking at 'woc' profiles, I've actually found quite a few 'woc' having 'no asians' on their profiles. The last paragraph you are quoting was written by a woc I think x I know... not sure how my point is not valid as I'm speaking from my own personal experience being a man of colour" I never said that your comments were not valid, I was just pointing out that were you started your previous post saying 'Classic examples of non-people of colour speaking for all people of colour...' that the last part of that particular text was in fact written by a person of colour, that's all | |||
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"Without reading everything, because I want to respond to the OP rather than everyone else, I’d say guy feel thinks no. This place is a rare place. It’s the one place where the straight white male is genuinely at the disadvantage purely by dint of his ubiquity. And I think that’s great by the way, this is in No Way a complaint! I do think that people who are nominally more likely to be discriminated against in general over the SWM, will actually be more likely to find success here. This is in the basis of no science for there is nothing except heresay, received wisdom and confirmation bias. But that’s why I think. Good luck to you!" I’d say that’s true of demographics that are deemed to have the characteristic they want ie the stereotype of black men having big cocks, I don’t think it’s true for all minorities though! Asian men are often tainted with cultural stereotyping. You see more profiles stating no Asians than ones that say no white men and yes the ones that state black only are excluding white men but they’re excluding Asian men too! | |||
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"Yes it is. But it's not impossible." • I'll add to my previous comment: I don't care about preferences or the partiality. Each to their own. It's the ungracious vernacular and the 'tone' that I find off-putting. For example "I love white with pink polka dots" is comparatively acceptable when compared to "WE ARE NOT INTO BROWN WITH BLUE CANDY-STRIPES!!" because the latter becomes a 'loaded' remark aimed at those very people. It's hurtful, demeaning and, on this site, soul destroying. I don't need to know what you despise. Just tell me what you prefer in a more palatable way because I am intelligent enough to determine if we have anything in common. Most men have it hard on here. Asians even harder: when a few bad apples behave unsatisfactorily no one forgets. And those majority who conduct themselves like gentlemen no one notices; they are jettisoned into the same aforementioned bucket. | |||
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"Yes it is. But it's not impossible. • I'll add to my previous comment: I don't care about preferences or the partiality. Each to their own. It's the ungracious vernacular and the 'tone' that I find off-putting. For example "I love white with pink polka dots" is comparatively acceptable when compared to "WE ARE NOT INTO BROWN WITH BLUE CANDY-STRIPES!!" because the latter becomes a 'loaded' remark aimed at those very people. It's hurtful, demeaning and, on this site, soul destroying. I don't need to know what you despise. Just tell me what you prefer in a more palatable way because I am intelligent enough to determine if we have anything in common. Most men have it hard on here. Asians even harder: when a few bad apples behave unsatisfactorily no one forgets. And those majority who conduct themselves like gentlemen no one notices; they are jettisoned into the same aforementioned bucket."  this. | |||
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"Without reading everything, because I want to respond to the OP rather than everyone else, I’d say guy feel thinks no. This place is a rare place. It’s the one place where the straight white male is genuinely at the disadvantage purely by dint of his ubiquity. And I think that’s great by the way, this is in No Way a complaint! I do think that people who are nominally more likely to be discriminated against in general over the SWM, will actually be more likely to find success here. This is in the basis of no science for there is nothing except heresay, received wisdom and confirmation bias. But that’s why I think. Good luck to you!" The idea that white men are still not the most desired on this website is interesting. | |||
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"Having read all the thread I’d like to add my own view as a white man living in a predominantly white society. First of all, a few posts reminds me the Duboisian double consciousness concept, where someone from an ethnic minorities looks at oneself through the eyes of the citizens of the majority. As an illustration, comments like a few bad Asians created a bad reputation for Asian males show how much an Asian male must pay attention to his behaviour to not be branded with those few ‘bad’ Asians. I’d even go further by saying that as a white person I have never felt the need to be apologetic for the bad behaviour of my fellow white citizens, because the one who behaved badly are usually categorised through mental illness terms, never through the culture they are belonging in (unless it is rich white against poor white, ‘classism’) As a white person, I have the privilege of never having to live this double consciousness on a daily basis. To paraphrase Edward Said: what matters, here, is that Asians speak through and by virtue of the majority imagination of them. The subjective perspective on objective reality plays a huge role in why Asian male struggle on here. States differently, the imaginative value we attach and feel about something seems to be much more important than the reality of those things. Furthermore, I am not able to understand how it feels to be solemnly rejected for your skin colour. I can ‘understand’ to a certain extent but not entirely. Consequently, I find the comments from ppl who comes from a privileged place or a place where they do not have to face it, or even apologise for the behaviour quite amusing. But again it is a colonial mentality. Where some Whites need to even tell minorities how they should feel and respond to racism. Or explain to them that it is not racism but they way they are coming across. As also stated people have the freedom of choice and have freedom of speech to voice it. Yet the ones who are at the opposite end have the same rights. They don’t want to have their feelings negated because it is uncomfortable for you to hear them from your privileged position. Perfectly put! It’s a cop out to just say ‘preferences’ without examining where those preferences come from. Are those preferences steeped in racism? Or a stereotypical cultural bias? Défunt cultural bias. I tried to think of any reasonable reason but I can’t find any. A pretty person is pretty not matter the skin colour. Unless the skin colour is associated with a cultural meaning. And thats where lies those preferences I believe. Interestingly some of the same people who say no Asians will meet light-skinned black men and in terms of skin tone there isn’t a lot of difference! I’m mixed race black but often get mistaken for Indian or Pakistani! So it has to be cultural stereotyping! And that’s why you don’t see it on male profile that often too. Well actually I have never ever come across it since my time on here. And I believe that must be Because Women are often seen as a winning trophy, and even if some men are racists, fucking the women from the ethnicity they don’t like, it is like branding a trophy. ‘Your women’ prefer fucking me. And this is why alot of woc won't touch white men cause too many of them are weird when it comes to dealing with us as if it's something to brag or be proud of Classic examples of non-people of colour speaking for all people of colour... really don't know how qualified you guys are in speaking for us but you always seem to love living our experience In my experience of looking at 'woc' profiles, I've actually found quite a few 'woc' having 'no asians' on their profiles. " Are you refering to me as a non person of colour? | |||
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"Without reading everything, because I want to respond to the OP rather than everyone else, I’d say guy feel thinks no. This place is a rare place. It’s the one place where the straight white male is genuinely at the disadvantage purely by dint of his ubiquity. And I think that’s great by the way, this is in No Way a complaint! I do think that people who are nominally more likely to be discriminated against in general over the SWM, will actually be more likely to find success here. This is in the basis of no science for there is nothing except heresay, received wisdom and confirmation bias. But that’s why I think. Good luck to you! The idea that white men are still not the most desired on this website is interesting. " Very interesting indeed. I feel awful for those poor white men.  | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. " Is very rare to read a profile that says : “ no Asians or blacks “ And I read them all in my range search | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Is very rare to read a profile that says : “ no Asians or blacks “ And I read them all in my range search " “ no whites “ has a higher rate . | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Is very rare to read a profile that says : “ no Asians or blacks “ And I read them all in my range search " Are you trolling? | |||
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"I do feel sorry for all the guys on here, its much more difficult for them, in general, than for couples and single girls. Just need to keep going guys x" Awww thanks …. U would be surprise , Even girls where struggling to meet girls . I had a FFM lover a couple of years ago and she struggle to chat girls . And she was a sexy hot curvy Caribbean girl . Super cute x x Single ladies is just very challenging . Think only couples are in advantage Wish is not fair 2 against one
Only kidding . Is what it is ^^ respect | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Is very rare to read a profile that says : “ no Asians or blacks “ And I read them all in my range search Are you trolling?" He must be trolling! It’s actually very common. | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Is very rare to read a profile that says : “ no Asians or blacks “ And I read them all in my range search Are you trolling?" No . Why ? Did I miss respect anyone ? I was only being honest …. I ment : I don’t imagine Asian men struggling here more then any one else xx Why did it look trolling ? I was only trying to help and share what I think Hope I didn’t offended or miss respect anyone x x | |||
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"The subject line pretty much says everything. Why would it be? It’s a swingers site not the KKK bro! It’s personal preference if people like you pal! Sell yourself on here and you will be fine It's not the KKK but certain parts of the swinging community are very racist So will I understand why he's asking the question I don't agree that it's more difficult for him just because he's asian " What do you call "racist"...? I am not attracted sexually by people of color. Am I racist or do I have the right to have sexual preferences and not be attracted by certain type of people...?? I'll tell you more; I am not attracted as well by overweight people or very hairy people. You're going to call me what?? Anti-this, anti-that...? | |||
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