FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Why do you have age preferences
Why do you have age preferences
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I don't feel comfortable if they are younger than my children and I don't fancy people a lot older than me"
Why do you feel uncomfortable? Would you feel uncomfortable Fucking sine one with the same middle name or hair colour as one of your children ? What’s it about age makes you uncomfortable |
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By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago
Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria |
Cuts down on messages and can’t really see us wanting to have sex with an 18 or 99 year old, as I’m thinking either personality compatibility, sexual ability or sexual attraction would be lacking  |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"It’s about the age gap rather than actual age. It’s about having something different than what is already on the plate "
In a good way or a bad way , like you prefer an age gap for a difference? Or you prefer no age gap |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Cuts down on messages and can’t really see us wanting to have sex with an 18 or 99 year old, as I’m thinking either personality compatibility, sexual ability or sexual attraction would be lacking "
There’s a lot of answers there. But let me pick one. Personal compatibility - you like people that are the same as you ? Mindset, opinions etc |
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"It’s about the age gap rather than actual age. It’s about having something different than what is already on the plate
In a good way or a bad way , like you prefer an age gap for a difference? Or you prefer no age gap"
In a good way in my opinion. It’s the upper age gap that reflects my preferences away from Fab too. I’ve never really been attracted to a much older man.
For the lower age - that’s more about fantasy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because yodas grandma had a crisis after her footrot set in 
Look if your gonna date old people you should always carry anti-fungal cream."
lessons in everything |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Simple question.
I know it’s a preference but why ? What are the real reasons you want to meet people only within the ages you put
Why do you have your preferences? "
I like the attitudes and energies of younger people. |
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"Simple question.
I know it’s a preference but why ? What are the real reasons you want to meet people only within the ages you put
Why do you have your preferences?
I like the attitudes and energies of younger people. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't feel comfortable if they are younger than my children and I don't fancy people a lot older than me
Why do you feel uncomfortable? Would you feel uncomfortable Fucking sine one with the same middle name or hair colour as one of your children ? What’s it about age makes you uncomfortable "
Wouldn’t fuck or date guys with the same first name as my kids either! Icky! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because yodas grandma had a crisis after her footrot set in
Look if your gonna date old people you should always carry anti-fungal cream."
I bring my own, I'll have you know. |
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Because probably like the next person I have a preference I don't like younger than me been there done that over and over again and was proven why I don't like them younger....
I also don't want some one who's old enough to be my dad either it just feels wrong for me..I don't have daddy issues lol and I don't wish to "help" the elderly...everyone has their reasons ....
I mean most men would like any ages 18-99 (says on their bio)but that's definitely not me....
Yet again it's just a preference...same as if people like or don't like bigger women or smaller,taller or older or younger...blonde or brunette...have kids or no kids...all about preference I don't get how ppl don't get that or understand it...
Cj xx |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I don't feel comfortable if they are younger than my children and I don't fancy people a lot older than me
Why do you feel uncomfortable? Would you feel uncomfortable Fucking sine one with the same middle name or hair colour as one of your children ? What’s it about age makes you uncomfortable
Wouldn’t fuck or date guys with the same first name as my kids either! Icky! "
Yeah luckily I’ve never had to deal with that, I’m
Not sure what I’d do. An instant no , or insist one of them must change their name possibly |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My lower age limit is because in general i don't want to meet guys a similar age to my kids. The older age limit is simply because i don't fancy guys much older than me  |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Because probably like the next person I have a preference I don't like younger than me been there done that over and over again and was proven why I don't like them younger....
I also don't want some one who's old enough to be my dad either it just feels wrong for me..I don't have daddy issues lol and I don't wish to "help" the elderly...everyone has their reasons ....
I mean most men would like any ages 18-99 (says on their bio)but that's definitely not me....
Yet again it's just a preference...same as if people like or don't like bigger women or smaller,taller or older or younger...blonde or brunette...have kids or no kids...all about preference I don't get how ppl don't get that or understand it...
Cj xx"
So to summarise….. it just fees wrong. Interesting. |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Because probably like the next person I have a preference I don't like younger than me been there done that over and over again and was proven why I don't like them younger....
I also don't want some one who's old enough to be my dad either it just feels wrong for me..I don't have daddy issues lol and I don't wish to "help" the elderly...everyone has their reasons ....
I mean most men would like any ages 18-99 (says on their bio)but that's definitely not me....
Yet again it's just a preference...same as if people like or don't like bigger women or smaller,taller or older or younger...blonde or brunette...have kids or no kids...all about preference I don't get how ppl don't get that or understand it...
Cj xx"
Most men do have 18-99 on their profile ( I never have) because they don’t have an age preference. Nothing wrong with that.
This post was about people who do have, like us, and the reasons why. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I use thus site to look for younger as its a bit more complicated finding them in everyday life. I do play with all ages, genders and ethnicities and I have access to loads of people via the lifestyle. Not many pale, skinny, tattooed gingers in Hackney. |
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" can’t really see us wanting to have sex with an 18 or 99 year old"
.
Maybe you are taking that too literally. We see it as a way of saying we aren't that bothered by age.
One person at 60 can come across as 'old' while another can seem like an old man at 45. |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
I don’t only want to meet people of those ages.
My age ranges are guides, I don’t filter out folks outside of the ages I give, I just know that those ages are the ones I’m more likely to find attractive.
I’ve met and will meet people that interest me, irrespective of their age.
If I meet someone at a club, I’m not going to ask their age so why would it bother me on here?
I think that people online are far too prescriptive whereas in life things are more fluid |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m flexible. But I tend to have much more in common and able to continue a conversation with people in the age range I’ve put.
But sometimes people surprise me. |
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On here it’s purely to cut down on messages, specifically certain types of messages. I don’t want to be someone’s first, train them; or play mother scenario or fulfil their older woman fantasy. If I like someone outside of my current age range, I’ll message them directly.
Out and about I don’t have a clue about ages, proven when I was turning up for a ‘big birthday’ for a friend and a 40th birthday card in hand, turned out he was only turning 30 oops
If we get on , we get on, I’ve always seemed to attract younger than myself over the years. |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
I have age preferences set the way they are on my profile as a message filter .If I see someone I like outside of those I can always send a first message to them.
In saying that I'm not interested in meeting those who are a lot younger or a lot older than I am I tend to be attracted to people closer to my own age.
I have met two men off here who lied about their age and the meet went no farther than a quick chat over a cup of coffee.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That is a very simple question.
What’s the answer ?
You have put an age preference of 25 - 45.
Ask yourself why you did that? "
Maybe your age preference like all of ours
Personally if I see a preference of 18-99 it actually is a instant put of for me. |
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"Because probably like the next person I have a preference I don't like younger than me been there done that over and over again and was proven why I don't like them younger....
I also don't want some one who's old enough to be my dad either it just feels wrong for me..I don't have daddy issues lol and I don't wish to "help" the elderly...everyone has their reasons ....
I mean most men would like any ages 18-99 (says on their bio)but that's definitely not me....
Yet again it's just a preference...same as if people like or don't like bigger women or smaller,taller or older or younger...blonde or brunette...have kids or no kids...all about preference I don't get how ppl don't get that or understand it...
Cj xx
So to summarise….. it just fees wrong. Interesting. "
Yep you asked a simple question I give my reasons why! Or me no one else simple...its what you asked for it's what I give ya simples .... |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I have age preferences set the way they are on my profile as a message filter .If I see someone I like outside of those I can always send a first message to them.
In saying that I'm not interested in meeting those who are a lot younger or a lot older than I am I tend to be attracted to people closer to my own age.
I have met two men off here who lied about their age and the meet went no farther than a quick chat over a cup of coffee.
"
So you’re only physically attracted to people roughly you own age. What if they really didn’t look thier real age , that would be ok then because it’s about how they look not thier age ?
If they were 100 years old bit looked jusr the same age of you , you would be attracted to them ? |
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"Because probably like the next person I have a preference I don't like younger than me been there done that over and over again and was proven why I don't like them younger....
I also don't want some one who's old enough to be my dad either it just feels wrong for me..I don't have daddy issues lol and I don't wish to "help" the elderly...everyone has their reasons ....
I mean most men would like any ages 18-99 (says on their bio)but that's definitely not me....
Yet again it's just a preference...same as if people like or don't like bigger women or smaller,taller or older or younger...blonde or brunette...have kids or no kids...all about preference I don't get how ppl don't get that or understand it...
Cj xx
Most men do have 18-99 on their profile ( I never have) because they don’t have an age preference. Nothing wrong with that.
This post was about people who do have, like us, and the reasons why. "
Ok simple answer then so you don't have to take time to read a reply.... "cause they do" there easier for ya? |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
I have a thing for old men (and old old men). But young men make me nervous, I had a bit of an uncomfortable experience in a nightclub once where I was cornered by a younger chap and it has just stuck with me.
My current age limits are set as message filters only. |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Because probably like the next person I have a preference I don't like younger than me been there done that over and over again and was proven why I don't like them younger....
I also don't want some one who's old enough to be my dad either it just feels wrong for me..I don't have daddy issues lol and I don't wish to "help" the elderly...everyone has their reasons ....
I mean most men would like any ages 18-99 (says on their bio)but that's definitely not me....
Yet again it's just a preference...same as if people like or don't like bigger women or smaller,taller or older or younger...blonde or brunette...have kids or no kids...all about preference I don't get how ppl don't get that or understand it...
Cj xx
Most men do have 18-99 on their profile ( I never have) because they don’t have an age preference. Nothing wrong with that.
This post was about people who do have, like us, and the reasons why.
Ok simple answer then so you don't have to take time to read a reply.... "cause they do" there easier for ya? "
That’s the single worst answer so far. You cannot have a second attempt either. |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I have a thing for old men (and old old men). But young men make me nervous, I had a bit of an uncomfortable experience in a nightclub once where I was cornered by a younger chap and it has just stuck with me.
My current age limits are set as message filters only."
I know you do. Every few moths I think to myself a bit closer to getting La Luna, I know I have a long way to go…..
Do you know why you like old men ? |
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I just feel more comfortable around people my age and younger. They seem to have more in common with me. Not necessarily just with interests and likes, but attitude and ways of thinking.
It's like some older people are just on a totally different plain of existence.
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The low age limit is cos any lower they'll probably spend most of the meet updating there Facebook status..or whatever social media these youngsters spend every waking moment of there lives on..the high limit..I don't really want the risk of them dying on me...a dead trannie is quite difficult to get rid of..  |
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By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago
Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria |
"Cuts down on messages and can’t really see us wanting to have sex with an 18 or 99 year old, as I’m thinking either personality compatibility, sexual ability or sexual attraction would be lacking
There’s a lot of answers there. But let me pick one. Personal compatibility - you like people that are the same as you ? Mindset, opinions etc "
We like to have a bit of banter, we don’t take ourselves too seriously and think Fab life should be fun, we like people we can have a laugh and fun, so the same kind of mindset in that respect yes. |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I just feel more comfortable around people my age and younger. They seem to have more in common with me. Not necessarily just with interests and likes, but attitude and ways of thinking.
It's like some older people are just on a totally different plain of existence.
"
Totally agree with you. |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
"I have age preferences set the way they are on my profile as a message filter .If I see someone I like outside of those I can always send a first message to them.
In saying that I'm not interested in meeting those who are a lot younger or a lot older than I am I tend to be attracted to people closer to my own age.
I have met two men off here who lied about their age and the meet went no farther than a quick chat over a cup of coffee.
So you’re only physically attracted to people roughly you own age. What if they really didn’t look thier real age , that would be ok then because it’s about how they look not thier age ?
If they were 100 years old bit looked jusr the same age of you , you would be attracted to them ?"
There's a lot more than just physical looks that makes me attracted to someone.
I actually don't know why people have to explain why they don't want to fuck others on here.
I don't get why some men seem to be obsessed about others age preferences on here.On threads about age is it usually men who throw in the line age is just a number. If it was then people wouldn't lie on here about their age. But they do so obviously it does matter,some even get younger every new profile they make. |
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"If I ever shag a 99 year old something has gone seriously wrong in my life - even if I'm 99 at the time!!!!"
If you are shagging at 99, I'd say something has gone seriously right in your life, even if it were with a 99 year old. |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"The low age limit is cos any lower they'll probably spend most of the meet updating there Facebook status..or whatever social media these youngsters spend every waking moment of there lives on..the high limit..I don't really want the risk of them dying on me...a dead trannie is quite difficult to get rid of.. "
I get that , under 30 can feel a bit too young sometimes , it’s often a case by case thing about maturity. Closer to 25 can be hard work sometimes , people of 25 -30 may be mature but certainly lack wisdom |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
"I have a thing for old men (and old old men). But young men make me nervous, I had a bit of an uncomfortable experience in a nightclub once where I was cornered by a younger chap and it has just stuck with me.
My current age limits are set as message filters only.
I know you do. Every few moths I think to myself a bit closer to getting La Luna, I know I have a long way to go…..
Do you know why you like old men ? "
I just like the wrinkles and saggy balls  |
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"Because probably like the next person I have a preference I don't like younger than me been there done that over and over again and was proven why I don't like them younger....
I also don't want some one who's old enough to be my dad either it just feels wrong for me..I don't have daddy issues lol and I don't wish to "help" the elderly...everyone has their reasons ....
I mean most men would like any ages 18-99 (says on their bio)but that's definitely not me....
Yet again it's just a preference...same as if people like or don't like bigger women or smaller,taller or older or younger...blonde or brunette...have kids or no kids...all about preference I don't get how ppl don't get that or understand it...
Cj xx
Most men do have 18-99 on their profile ( I never have) because they don’t have an age preference. Nothing wrong with that.
This post was about people who do have, like us, and the reasons why.
Ok simple answer then so you don't have to take time to read a reply.... "cause they do" there easier for ya?
That’s the single worst answer so far. You cannot have a second attempt either. "
So a question for you then why do you have filters on age range but asking others why they have and don't like their reply? Bit strange don't ya think? And you don't have a preference but you like certain hair colours and body types ...contradicting yourself much?? |
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Different reasons, the main one being that I have more in common with people close to my own age. I always liked a social aspect to meets rather than just getting straight down to it, and I do enough asking "who???" when my younger work colleagues are talking about music and celebrities without doing on a meet.
Another reason is, having met much younger men in the past, my experience was that the enthusiasm and stamina were there, but the technique and approach weren't always (that's not to say it always has been with older men, but the hit rate was higher).
There are certain fashions that I really don't like, mainly worn by people below my minimum age range, and that would have put me off someone from the outset. The same with pictures with their tongue sticking out, I've mainly seen younger men with those. |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I have age preferences set the way they are on my profile as a message filter .If I see someone I like outside of those I can always send a first message to them.
In saying that I'm not interested in meeting those who are a lot younger or a lot older than I am I tend to be attracted to people closer to my own age.
I have met two men off here who lied about their age and the meet went no farther than a quick chat over a cup of coffee.
So you’re only physically attracted to people roughly you own age. What if they really didn’t look thier real age , that would be ok then because it’s about how they look not thier age ?
If they were 100 years old bit looked jusr the same age of you , you would be attracted to them ?
There's a lot more than just physical looks that makes me attracted to someone.
I actually don't know why people have to explain why they don't want to fuck others on here.
I don't get why some men seem to be obsessed about others age preferences on here.On threads about age is it usually men who throw in the line age is just a number. If it was then people wouldn't lie on here about their age. But they do so obviously it does matter,some even get younger every new profile they make. "
So just to be clear , you certainly don’t need to explain to me on this thread, people can simply not reply.
I realise as a woman you probably have to explain to guys regularly why they are the wrong age etc and you should not have to , I wouldn’t I’d just give them one word - No , my No is my No, it’s done.
On this thread I just wanted to understand some of the underlying reasons for ageism and lack of ageism in sex and relationships |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've given quite a lot of thought about my age preferences as I've been challenged about them a few times. I'm 51 and have 37-57 set at present. I've only slept with one man older than me ever. I find that my values and attitudes largely clash with theirs.
I don't have a lower age limit (although I've been with younger men) because we're looking for different things in life and tbh I just feel an old crone next to them. I do see a guy occasionally who is 31, but he's an old friend and not a typical 31yo. |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Because probably like the next person I have a preference I don't like younger than me been there done that over and over again and was proven why I don't like them younger....
I also don't want some one who's old enough to be my dad either it just feels wrong for me..I don't have daddy issues lol and I don't wish to "help" the elderly...everyone has their reasons ....
I mean most men would like any ages 18-99 (says on their bio)but that's definitely not me....
Yet again it's just a preference...same as if people like or don't like bigger women or smaller,taller or older or younger...blonde or brunette...have kids or no kids...all about preference I don't get how ppl don't get that or understand it...
Cj xx
Most men do have 18-99 on their profile ( I never have) because they don’t have an age preference. Nothing wrong with that.
This post was about people who do have, like us, and the reasons why.
Ok simple answer then so you don't have to take time to read a reply.... "cause they do" there easier for ya?
That’s the single worst answer so far. You cannot have a second attempt either.
So a question for you then why do you have filters on age range but asking others why they have and don't like their reply? Bit strange don't ya think? And you don't have a preference but you like certain hair colours and body types ...contradicting yourself much?? "
I have she preferences not filters actually and I’ve already answered the question on why. Why don’t I have message filters on age ? Because I’m open to being wrong sometimes |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Different reasons, the main one being that I have more in common with people close to my own age. I always liked a social aspect to meets rather than just getting straight down to it, and I do enough asking "who???" when my younger work colleagues are talking about music and celebrities without doing on a meet.
Another reason is, having met much younger men in the past, my experience was that the enthusiasm and stamina were there, but the technique and approach weren't always (that's not to say it always has been with older men, but the hit rate was higher).
There are certain fashions that I really don't like, mainly worn by people below my minimum age range, and that would have put me off someone from the outset. The same with pictures with their tongue sticking out, I've mainly seen younger men with those. "
I think I share some of that , pouty lips and tongues out can be a big turn off , sometimes.
So it’s confirmed…. us older men definitely have it in the sheets over the young guys? We just need a few cans of red bull
But I quite like to date someone from a different culture , be that country, age, class etc I think diversity and the constant asking “who” has a lot of benefits in relationships and at work ! |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I've given quite a lot of thought about my age preferences as I've been challenged about them a few times. I'm 51 and have 37-57 set at present. I've only slept with one man older than me ever. I find that my values and attitudes largely clash with theirs.
I don't have a lower age limit (although I've been with younger men) because we're looking for different things in life and tbh I just feel an old crone next to them. I do see a guy occasionally who is 31, but he's an old friend and not a typical 31yo. "
So maybe you will ultimately reduce your upper age ? I think younger people looking for different things in life is an issue, but you shouldn’t ever feel like an old crone next to them, you are just two humans at different stages of your journeys |
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My upper age filter on here is flexible but only because I've never been with a woman older than me at any time in my life.
My lower age filter will always be 10 years above my eldest daughters age because I've no interest in being with a woman of that age.
It doesn't matter how mature they may be because that has no bearing on anything.
The thing I've found on here is that no matter how many women and couples post in these threads and express similar preferences they are always accepted for what they are.
I have been challenged numerous times usually by other men with an "ah but" or "what if?" response.
Yeah I know it's predictable but not all men think with their little heads so if we express a preference it should be respected. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have adults sons
Young guys want to “snap”, wtf?
They watch too much porn and think everything has to be rammed in and rough.
They stick their tongues out on photos.
I want to be the younger one, young men make me feel old!
All generalisations of course. |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"My upper age filter on here is flexible but only because I've never been with a woman older than me at any time in my life.
My lower age filter will always be 10 years above my eldest daughters age because I've no interest in being with a woman of that age.
It doesn't matter how mature they may be because that has no bearing on anything.
The thing I've found on here is that no matter how many women and couples post in these threads and express similar preferences they are always accepted for what they are.
I have been challenged numerous times usually by other men with an "ah but" or "what if?" response.
Yeah I know it's predictable but not all men think with their little heads so if we express a preference it should be respected. "
I fully respect everyone’s age preferences, even if they are clearly aegist. Because age is not a protected characteristic when selecting who you date or sleep with.
But I find the explanation “ My lower age filter will always be 10 years above my eldest daughters age” one of the oddest , why 10 not 9 or 11 , when eldest daughters and not eldest nephew or niece ? Or next door neighbours eldest fish ?
You say you’ve no interest , but you don’t know why ?
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I have adults sons
Young guys want to “snap”, wtf?
They watch too much porn and think everything has to be rammed in and rough.
They stick their tongues out on photos.
I want to be the younger one, young men make me feel old!
All generalisations of course."
I get it, they are like children and generalisations have some truth . All my daughters date older guys for this reason |
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"My upper age filter on here is flexible but only because I've never been with a woman older than me at any time in my life.
My lower age filter will always be 10 years above my eldest daughters age because I've no interest in being with a woman of that age.
It doesn't matter how mature they may be because that has no bearing on anything.
The thing I've found on here is that no matter how many women and couples post in these threads and express similar preferences they are always accepted for what they are.
I have been challenged numerous times usually by other men with an "ah but" or "what if?" response.
Yeah I know it's predictable but not all men think with their little heads so if we express a preference it should be respected.
I fully respect everyone’s age preferences, even if they are clearly aegist. Because age is not a protected characteristic when selecting who you date or sleep with.
But I find the explanation “ My lower age filter will always be 10 years above my eldest daughters age” one of the oddest , why 10 not 9 or 11 , when eldest daughters and not eldest nephew or niece ? Or next door neighbours eldest fish ?
You say you’ve no interest , but you don’t know why ?
"
I know exactly why but once again I've no interest in explaining it to anyone who doesn't need to know. |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I'll have more in common with the people from my age range so conversation flows easier "
Yes it’s more challenging to connect sometimes when you have less in common. I’ve always been attracted to that , people that are like me would be impossible for me to date |
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Although I do get propositioned from young girls which I'm flattered by, I must admit that younger than my son is outside of my comfort zone, and if I had a daughter, and some randy old codger of my age was to start chancing his luck, I'd be quite likely to take his head of his shoulders. |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"My upper age filter on here is flexible but only because I've never been with a woman older than me at any time in my life.
My lower age filter will always be 10 years above my eldest daughters age because I've no interest in being with a woman of that age.
It doesn't matter how mature they may be because that has no bearing on anything.
The thing I've found on here is that no matter how many women and couples post in these threads and express similar preferences they are always accepted for what they are.
I have been challenged numerous times usually by other men with an "ah but" or "what if?" response.
Yeah I know it's predictable but not all men think with their little heads so if we express a preference it should be respected. "
Older men try to convince me I'll enjoy time with them. Tried it, does nothing for me.
I don't know why. |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Although I do get propositioned from young girls which I'm flattered by, I must admit that younger than my son is outside of my comfort zone, and if I had a daughter, and some randy old codger of my age was to start chancing his luck, I'd be quite likely to take his head of his shoulders."
Lol. Luckily that’s never happened to me , I always keep my eyes on the fathers hands, he’s makes his move I deck him first |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I find it weird that you’re arguing hard when people explain their lower age limits. It’s not weird at all to not wanna fuck people your kids ages.
1. If your kids live close by you could end up fucking one of their friends.
2. It feels like because she you like them much younger you think everyone should.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've given quite a lot of thought about my age preferences as I've been challenged about them a few times. I'm 51 and have 37-57 set at present. I've only slept with one man older than me ever. I find that my values and attitudes largely clash with theirs.
I don't have a lower age limit (although I've been with younger men) because we're looking for different things in life and tbh I just feel an old crone next to them. I do see a guy occasionally who is 31, but he's an old friend and not a typical 31yo.
So maybe you will ultimately reduce your upper age ? I think younger people looking for different things in life is an issue, but you shouldn’t ever feel like an old crone next to them, you are just two humans at different stages of your journeys "
I have reduced my upper limit, I find in my area at least men in their mid-late 50s are not men I want to spend time with. They're too bound up in status and money.
I am old next to someone who is 33. No getting around that.
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I've given quite a lot of thought about my age preferences as I've been challenged about them a few times. I'm 51 and have 37-57 set at present. I've only slept with one man older than me ever. I find that my values and attitudes largely clash with theirs.
I don't have a lower age limit (although I've been with younger men) because we're looking for different things in life and tbh I just feel an old crone next to them. I do see a guy occasionally who is 31, but he's an old friend and not a typical 31yo.
So maybe you will ultimately reduce your upper age ? I think younger people looking for different things in life is an issue, but you shouldn’t ever feel like an old crone next to them, you are just two humans at different stages of your journeys
I have reduced my upper limit, I find in my area at least men in their mid-late 50s are not men I want to spend time with. They're too bound up in status and money.
I am old next to someone who is 33. No getting around that.
"
I’ve met guys like as part of a couple , some are just insecure trying to impress , sine are just genuinely boring and money / business focussed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It’s about the age gap rather than actual age. It’s about having something different than what is already on the plate "
This, its the age gap not the age (works both ways, older and younger), as I get older so will my age boundaries! |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"So I can try and not look desperate.
Read too many comments about having 18-99 on your profile turns women off. "
Correct answer
You win a night win an 18 years old man and 99 year old woman. Enjoy
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"On here cuts down on messages.
Though generally am not attracted to much younger or much older than myself.
It's a great filter.
"
Age preferences are not fab message filters.
You can filter messages by age as well but this post isn’t about that.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Really good question OP and some fascinating replies - ones that show a great deal of prejudice too - and I'm saying that in the true meaning of the word to pre judge. I get many of the comments are made tongue in cheek but they amount to making sweeping assumptions about a person based in their age rather than any knowledge of them.
Having an age range of 18 - 99 is often faced with a really childish and judgemental attitude with the assumption of no 'standards'. This may be the case but probably isn't.
Would I find that I don't have much in common with someone a lot younger than me? Quite probably. Would I find that many younger people act in ways that remind me too much of my step kids? Again, quite probably. Does this mean that *all* younger people are like this? Absolutely not. Ageism is just like any other ism. It uses an aspect of a person that they have absolutely no control over to make assumptions of their worth, their behavoir,and their desireability. Much like the never ending debate about whether skin colour preferences are racist or not, I don't believe that age boundaries are necessarily ageist though this doesn't prevent ageist attitudes being disguised as preferences. Also, much like skin colour preferences it can only ever be a very blunt tool and doesn't make allowances for outliers. I'm unlikely to find much in common with a 22 year old but it isn't impossible that I could find one who I actually get on really well with.
Her ladyship definitely does have age preferences and age boundaries are a useful blunt tool to reduce the amount of unwanted messages we get so we have them set. If I were on here as a single man I wouldn't, it can be hard enough finding women I like and who like me without blocking off any possibilities just because the chances of compatibility are lower.
Mr |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"anything under or over makes me feel sick! Thats my personal opinion
Feeling sick is t an opinion
Get some anti sickness pills and fuck an oldie "
The author of "The Righteous Mind" proposes that all moral judgements are made instinctively and *all* reasons given for them are post hoc confabulations that attempt to justify the feeling. I think he provides more than enough evidence to prove his point. I'm not sure where attraction begins and morality ends but it's very clear many of the answers around younger people have a moral aspect for a lot of people here. Where this is the case, any explanation given will be invented post hoc to explain the instinctive distaste.
Mr |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've given quite a lot of thought about my age preferences as I've been challenged about them a few times. I'm 51 and have 37-57 set at present. I've only slept with one man older than me ever. I find that my values and attitudes largely clash with theirs.
I don't have a lower age limit (although I've been with younger men) because we're looking for different things in life and tbh I just feel an old crone next to them. I do see a guy occasionally who is 31, but he's an old friend and not a typical 31yo.
So maybe you will ultimately reduce your upper age ? I think younger people looking for different things in life is an issue, but you shouldn’t ever feel like an old crone next to them, you are just two humans at different stages of your journeys
I have reduced my upper limit, I find in my area at least men in their mid-late 50s are not men I want to spend time with. They're too bound up in status and money.
I am old next to someone who is 33. No getting around that.
I’ve met guys like as part of a couple , some are just insecure trying to impress , sine are just genuinely boring and money / business focussed. "
Some women will like men who offer dinner in Michelin restaurants and a fancy sportscar. I'm not one of them. |
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A woman aged 40 once told me on here that it creeped her out when men over 50 contacted her but her upper age filter was set at 55. Every one of her displayed veries was aged between 22 and 28.
People will say one thing and do another and if my preferences make me ageist I'm good with that just in the same way that some people could accuse me of being homophobic because I've no interest in other men. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think it isn't chiefly about age for me, more so if I'm genuinely attracted to that person in particular.
Some folks age gracefully, others not so much. I've seen 53 year olds who I would definitely have no problem being involved with sexually if we did get on well, and have also seen people younger than me that look absolutely dreadful.
Obviously my preferences could shift as I grow older. That's only natural. After all, unlike my 12 year old self, I no longer find 12 year olds attractive. Shocker I know
Think of it as a normal distribution graph. It's not a hard limit, but the more someone deviates from my own age, the less likely I am to find them attractive, statistically. |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"A woman aged 40 once told me on here that it creeped her out when men over 50 contacted her but her upper age filter was set at 55. Every one of her displayed veries was aged between 22 and 28.
People will say one thing and do another and if my preferences make me ageist I'm good with that just in the same way that some people could accuse me of being homophobic because I've no interest in other men. "
I think many people say one thing and do another in this area, it’s a preference not a boundary after all.
I think aegist is when there’s more of a hard boundary you can’t explain , it’s like racism or sexism. You don’t like someone because of an arbitrary things like a number , race, Color , gender without understanding why |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Too young and feels really pervy and out of order.
Do you have unresolved issues ?
That question can be switched.
Do you have unresolved issues?"
Generally no. I tend to have preferences and opinions for valid reasons I can explain. Things don’t just *feel* “out of order” without being able to explain why .
Does that make sense ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Too young and feels really pervy and out of order.
Do you have unresolved issues ?
That question can be switched.
Do you have unresolved issues?
Generally no. I tend to have preferences and opinions for valid reasons I can explain. Things don’t just *feel* “out of order” without being able to explain why .
Does that make sense ? "
To me, yes it does, though I also understand how not feeling right is enough for some. |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"If ever there's anyone still swinging and they are 98 or 99 I'll let every one know  "
They probably won’t be from Glasgow looking at the stats, probably Rushcliffe near me they have the healthiest and horniest oldies in the uk |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Too young and feels really pervy and out of order.
Do you have unresolved issues ?
That question can be switched.
Do you have unresolved issues?
Generally no. I tend to have preferences and opinions for valid reasons I can explain. Things don’t just *feel* “out of order” without being able to explain why .
Does that make sense ?
To me, yes it does, though I also understand how not feeling right is enough for some."
Guess I’m just more interested in the motives and reasons than the preferences themselves. Often when you delve you find surprises - good and bad |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have age preferences set the way they are on my profile as a message filter .If I see someone I like outside of those I can always send a first message to them.
In saying that I'm not interested in meeting those who are a lot younger or a lot older than I am I tend to be attracted to people closer to my own age.
I have met two men off here who lied about their age and the meet went no farther than a quick chat over a cup of coffee.
So you’re only physically attracted to people roughly you own age. What if they really didn’t look thier real age , that would be ok then because it’s about how they look not thier age ?
If they were 100 years old bit looked jusr the same age of you , you would be attracted to them ?"
I have to agree. All this age range stuff is just silly. I look younger than my age so prefer to meet younger than myself 18+. Why should i not be able to just because i look younger than my real age? |
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If you can answer why not you will be able to answer why?
Age means you might share some things in common or be able to have a ground for conversation to flow, like reminiscing on a world event, experience, school, music, shows, etc. Of course, there is a lot of nuance like environment, education, and music, which can bridge or differentiate hugely. |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
"I have age preferences set the way they are on my profile as a message filter .If I see someone I like outside of those I can always send a first message to them.
In saying that I'm not interested in meeting those who are a lot younger or a lot older than I am I tend to be attracted to people closer to my own age.
I have met two men off here who lied about their age and the meet went no farther than a quick chat over a cup of coffee.
So you’re only physically attracted to people roughly you own age. What if they really didn’t look thier real age , that would be ok then because it’s about how they look not thier age ?
If they were 100 years old bit looked jusr the same age of you , you would be attracted to them ?
I have to agree. All this age range stuff is just silly. I look younger than my age so prefer to meet younger than myself 18+. Why should i not be able to just because i look younger than my real age? "
You can meet whoever you want no one has said that you can't meet someone younger if that's what both of you want.
But the whole age range is stupid attitude shows a lack of respect for other people's preferences and choices.
It doesn't matter if you think you look younger and you think you suit what the other person wants. If they don't want to meet you that's their choice even if it is just because you are a certain age. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I’ve found the younger guys I’ve met on here have been very pushy and forceful. I’ve been told that I should be grateful that a younger guy would be interested in me! Suffice to say I now have an age limit to stop this as it really put me off and I’m not currently meeting at the moment |
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"I have age preferences set the way they are on my profile as a message filter .If I see someone I like outside of those I can always send a first message to them.
In saying that I'm not interested in meeting those who are a lot younger or a lot older than I am I tend to be attracted to people closer to my own age.
I have met two men off here who lied about their age and the meet went no farther than a quick chat over a cup of coffee.
So you’re only physically attracted to people roughly you own age. What if they really didn’t look thier real age , that would be ok then because it’s about how they look not thier age ?
If they were 100 years old bit looked jusr the same age of you , you would be attracted to them ?
I have to agree. All this age range stuff is just silly. I look younger than my age so prefer to meet younger than myself 18+. Why should i not be able to just because i look younger than my real age? "
I'm 57 and have been told all my life I don't look my age. In recent times I've been told I could easily pass for someone 10-12 years younger. That has nothing whatsoever to do with my preferences. I'll use the word boundary instead and I have very clear boundaries when it comes to age which I'm fully entitled to have.
I joined here aged 52 with virtually no sexual experience and I am very fussy over who I get naked with.
I could easily have been like a kid in a sweet shop but that's not me.
I've no interest in meeting lots of people and humble brag or not I have turned down more opportunities than I have accepted because they weren't right for me.
I'm only interested in meeting women who are not only on a similar journey to mine but also at a similar point on that journey in regards to experience.
I'm not going to be anyone's box ticking exercise.
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I have age preferences set the way they are on my profile as a message filter .If I see someone I like outside of those I can always send a first message to them.
In saying that I'm not interested in meeting those who are a lot younger or a lot older than I am I tend to be attracted to people closer to my own age.
I have met two men off here who lied about their age and the meet went no farther than a quick chat over a cup of coffee.
So you’re only physically attracted to people roughly you own age. What if they really didn’t look thier real age , that would be ok then because it’s about how they look not thier age ?
If they were 100 years old bit looked jusr the same age of you , you would be attracted to them ?
I have to agree. All this age range stuff is just silly. I look younger than my age so prefer to meet younger than myself 18+. Why should i not be able to just because i look younger than my real age?
I'm 57 and have been told all my life I don't look my age. In recent times I've been told I could easily pass for someone 10-12 years younger. That has nothing whatsoever to do with my preferences. I'll use the word boundary instead and I have very clear boundaries when it comes to age which I'm fully entitled to have.
I joined here aged 52 with virtually no sexual experience and I am very fussy over who I get naked with.
I could easily have been like a kid in a sweet shop but that's not me.
I've no interest in meeting lots of people and humble brag or not I have turned down more opportunities than I have accepted because they weren't right for me.
I'm only interested in meeting women who are not only on a similar journey to mine but also at a similar point on that journey in regards to experience.
I'm not going to be anyone's box ticking exercise.
"
That makes a lot of sense, thanks.
I’m similar to you and until the last couple of years was regularly told I look 10 years younger. I’ve also turned down more opportunities than I’ve said yes to. But I’m the opposite to you in that I don’t really want to meet people on the same journey at the same stage with the same attitudes and views, that’s sounds so boring to me |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Lots of reasons
I'm not attracted to under 30s they look like boys to me!
My grandson is 23 x
Younger men are clingy or imatuture!
Upper age on other hand is ok have no upper age x"
People of all ages and genders can be clingy and immature. I think I’m quite immature actually and I’m 50 ! |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I’ve found the younger guys I’ve met on here have been very pushy and forceful. I’ve been told that I should be grateful that a younger guy would be interested in me! Suffice to say I now have an age limit to stop this as it really put me off and I’m not currently meeting at the moment "
That’s a shame. I’m sure they all aren’t , but I’ve heard similar. I think men don’t really grow up and understand women until about 40 |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I have age preferences set the way they are on my profile as a message filter .If I see someone I like outside of those I can always send a first message to them.
In saying that I'm not interested in meeting those who are a lot younger or a lot older than I am I tend to be attracted to people closer to my own age.
I have met two men off here who lied about their age and the meet went no farther than a quick chat over a cup of coffee.
So you’re only physically attracted to people roughly you own age. What if they really didn’t look thier real age , that would be ok then because it’s about how they look not thier age ?
If they were 100 years old bit looked jusr the same age of you , you would be attracted to them ?
I have to agree. All this age range stuff is just silly. I look younger than my age so prefer to meet younger than myself 18+. Why should i not be able to just because i look younger than my real age? "
You can meet who you want if they want to me you , but you can’t moan if someone has age preferences that rule you out, that’s abusive |
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I would meet with people outside the ranges I have on fab.
I generally I think it's a percentage thing. The percentage of men I find attractive over 50 is low so makes no sense to allow all those messages in my in box. Same with those younger than my age ranges. |
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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
"Because I can
Can what ?
You need to answer not answer or be funny. Sorry I should have made it clearer.
Ok my apologies
Because maturity and common ground even though some still have the wild kid within ourselves but still sensible (manners)
"
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Because I can
Can what ?
You need to answer not answer or be funny. Sorry I should have made it clearer.
Ok my apologies
Because maturity and common ground even though some still have the wild kid within ourselves but still sensible (manners)
"
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"Lots of reasons
I'm not attracted to under 30s they look like boys to me!
My grandson is 23 x
Younger men are clingy or imatuture!
Upper age on other hand is ok have no upper age x
People of all ages and genders can be clingy and immature. I think I’m quite immature actually and I’m 50 ! "
Me 2! That's why I need someone to act their age lol x |
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By *ornLordMan
over a year ago
Wiltshire and London |
" Because I'd rather not be seen with people who wear socks and sandals, and the younger generation have reintroduced the mullet as fashionable. "
It's the intersection of those that you really have to worry about! |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Lots of reasons
I'm not attracted to under 30s they look like boys to me!
My grandson is 23 x
Younger men are clingy or imatuture!
Upper age on other hand is ok have no upper age x
People of all ages and genders can be clingy and immature. I think I’m quite immature actually and I’m 50 !
Me 2! That's why I need someone to act their age lol x"
If I acted my age I think my days here would be done |
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By *9alMan
over a year ago
Bridgend |
I have no strong preference for older or younger, if you are finding plenty of action with a narrow age range thats fine but you nay be missing out on a lot of fun by being too fussy |
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I look at people my age that I know, work colleagues etc, and very few have aged well. I know there are other factors ( heavy drinkers, smokers etc) that have made them age that way, but I use that as a reference point. |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I have no strong preference for older or younger, if you are finding plenty of action with a narrow age range thats fine but you nay be missing out on a lot of fun by being too fussy "
I would imagine most people with narrow age ranges can be very very fussy, but yep always a risk you miss a good one that’s why you can set preferences but not apply them to messages |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I look at people my age that I know, work colleagues etc, and very few have aged well. I know there are other factors ( heavy drinkers, smokers etc) that have made them age that way, but I use that as a reference point."
So it’s physical attraction to younger ? |
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By *onb21Woman
over a year ago
Cardiff |
It is just one way of filtering and limiting the people I engage with. It's never an absolute but chances that someone much older or much younger is going to make me feel good are just slimmer. |
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"I look at people my age that I know, work colleagues etc, and very few have aged well. I know there are other factors ( heavy drinkers, smokers etc) that have made them age that way, but I use that as a reference point.
So it’s physical attraction to younger ?
"
Generally yes, but I do keep a look out for men around my age. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A woman aged 40 once told me on here that it creeped her out when men over 50 contacted her but her upper age filter was set at 55. Every one of her displayed veries was aged between 22 and 28.
People will say one thing and do another and if my preferences make me ageist I'm good with that just in the same way that some people could accuse me of being homophobic because I've no interest in other men.
I think many people say one thing and do another in this area, it’s a preference not a boundary after all.
I think aegist is when there’s more of a hard boundary you can’t explain , it’s like racism or sexism. You don’t like someone because of an arbitrary things like a number , race, Color , gender without understanding why "
Why should people 'understand why' they find X attraction but Y not attractive?
Should gay people work on who they are attracted to? They should have a good reason they can explain, right. |
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By *mily36CWoman
over a year ago
Beds (or anywhere beginning with B..!?) |
"If ever there's anyone still swinging and they are 98 or 99 I'll let every one know
They probably won’t be from Glasgow looking at the stats, probably Rushcliffe near me they have the healthiest and horniest oldies in the uk "
Did bump into a couple in their 70s at VA once ... they looked like they were having the time of their lives too |
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"Simple question.
I know it’s a preference but why ? What are the real reasons you want to meet people only within the ages you put
Why do you have your preferences?
I like the attitudes and energies of younger people.
"
I get that - and in general I meet younger people for the same reason - and they tend to have greater stamina.
However - I feel it’s also wise to be open to meeting people outside that range on a case by case basis. I’ve had some amazing meets with chaps but under and over my age limit who’ve been either unusually mature for their age - or an older chap who has a lot of youthful exuberance for an old fart. |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Really good question OP and some fascinating replies - ones that show a great deal of prejudice too - and I'm saying that in the true meaning of the word to pre judge. I get many of the comments are made tongue in cheek but they amount to making sweeping assumptions about a person based in their age rather than any knowledge of them.
Having an age range of 18 - 99 is often faced with a really childish and judgemental attitude with the assumption of no 'standards'. This may be the case but probably isn't.
Would I find that I don't have much in common with someone a lot younger than me? Quite probably. Would I find that many younger people act in ways that remind me too much of my step kids? Again, quite probably. Does this mean that *all* younger people are like this? Absolutely not. Ageism is just like any other ism. It uses an aspect of a person that they have absolutely no control over to make assumptions of their worth, their behavoir,and their desireability. Much like the never ending debate about whether skin colour preferences are racist or not, I don't believe that age boundaries are necessarily ageist though this doesn't prevent ageist attitudes being disguised as preferences. Also, much like skin colour preferences it can only ever be a very blunt tool and doesn't make allowances for outliers. I'm unlikely to find much in common with a 22 year old but it isn't impossible that I could find one who I actually get on really well with.
Her ladyship definitely does have age preferences and age boundaries are a useful blunt tool to reduce the amount of unwanted messages we get so we have them set. If I were on here as a single man I wouldn't, it can be hard enough finding women I like and who like me without blocking off any possibilities just because the chances of compatibility are lower.
Mr"
I like this answer.
I've been slated a lot for questioning why people have specific age preferences. Not because I think they aren't entitled to them - of course they are. But because like the OP it's a subject that intrigues me.
Putting any strict limits based on a single factor - in this case age - will always mean you're basing a decision on data that you're assuming has been accurately input (and as we know that's not always the case) as well as making restrictions based on something that isn't the same for everyone. Not all 40 year olds look or act the same age, even though they are by definition. The same is true for any age.
Few men of 58 will look like Brad Pitt. Few women of 53 will look like Jennifer Aniston.
I've often stated that I've never seen anyone ask for someone's age in a swingers club. Likewise even in 'vanilla land' I've never noticed anyone in pubs or clubs strike up a chat with someone they fancy with the opening line of 'so how old are you?'.
It just seems odd to me that some are completely rigid in their choices when I can't think of another characteristic that would determine a blanket ban on any interest - height, hair colour, figure, boob/cock size etc.
People can choose who they want, based on what they want.
.I'd ve very curious to see however, how accurately they could gauge peoples ages if there was a bug in the Fab system and all age data on profiles vanished!
I suspect they'd just go by the pretty pictures and make a judgement call based on those....... 
A |
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By *ornLordMan
over a year ago
Wiltshire and London |
It's a good question with no easy answer. The thing is that age prefs on Fabs are a bit of a blunt instrument, making it look as though the preference is the same for all the categories (in may case F, MF or FF) that you'd like to play with - and I emphasis play with; in my experience, a wider age gap with a younger single makes it less likely that you end up with a sticky romantic attachment getting in the way. There's not that problem with a couple. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Its simple really...
I feel i probably have more in common with those within my chosen age bracket..don't forget we do have to have some things in common to form a connection
If i widened it out at the younger end of the spectrum I would be wondering why someone of that age would want to meet for apart from the obvious |
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My age preferences is based on what I find attractive. Generally everyone outside that isn’t attractive to me. There is the odd exception. I’m not everyone’s cup of preferred drink wether it’s age height or something else, everyone has preferences |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The reason I have an age preference now is due to time wasters or them being rude or pushy! I never used to be bothered about she if I liked the profile and the pictures and we got along then fine!
Now sadly I have an age preference but even sometimes the older ones can be just as bad as the younger it’s about trying to wheedle out the ones like that or else it just spoils this site |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Generally younger than me because I feel younger than I am and they make me feel younger. They're more fun/open, less jaded/bitter.
"
That’s interesting, I find the sane, generally with younger women, they dint make me feel younger as such but make it easier to be myself which is probably different to most guys my age |
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By *rHotNotts OP Man
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Really good question OP and some fascinating replies - ones that show a great deal of prejudice too - and I'm saying that in the true meaning of the word to pre judge. I get many of the comments are made tongue in cheek but they amount to making sweeping assumptions about a person based in their age rather than any knowledge of them.
Having an age range of 18 - 99 is often faced with a really childish and judgemental attitude with the assumption of no 'standards'. This may be the case but probably isn't.
Would I find that I don't have much in common with someone a lot younger than me? Quite probably. Would I find that many younger people act in ways that remind me too much of my step kids? Again, quite probably. Does this mean that *all* younger people are like this? Absolutely not. Ageism is just like any other ism. It uses an aspect of a person that they have absolutely no control over to make assumptions of their worth, their behavoir,and their desireability. Much like the never ending debate about whether skin colour preferences are racist or not, I don't believe that age boundaries are necessarily ageist though this doesn't prevent ageist attitudes being disguised as preferences. Also, much like skin colour preferences it can only ever be a very blunt tool and doesn't make allowances for outliers. I'm unlikely to find much in common with a 22 year old but it isn't impossible that I could find one who I actually get on really well with.
Her ladyship definitely does have age preferences and age boundaries are a useful blunt tool to reduce the amount of unwanted messages we get so we have them set. If I were on here as a single man I wouldn't, it can be hard enough finding women I like and who like me without blocking off any possibilities just because the chances of compatibility are lower.
Mr
I like this answer.
I've been slated a lot for questioning why people have specific age preferences. Not because I think they aren't entitled to them - of course they are. But because like the OP it's a subject that intrigues me.
Putting any strict limits based on a single factor - in this case age - will always mean you're basing a decision on data that you're assuming has been accurately input (and as we know that's not always the case) as well as making restrictions based on something that isn't the same for everyone. Not all 40 year olds look or act the same age, even though they are by definition. The same is true for any age.
Few men of 58 will look like Brad Pitt. Few women of 53 will look like Jennifer Aniston.
I've often stated that I've never seen anyone ask for someone's age in a swingers club. Likewise even in 'vanilla land' I've never noticed anyone in pubs or clubs strike up a chat with someone they fancy with the opening line of 'so how old are you?'.
It just seems odd to me that some are completely rigid in their choices when I can't think of another characteristic that would determine a blanket ban on any interest - height, hair colour, figure, boob/cock size etc.
People can choose who they want, based on what they want.
.I'd ve very curious to see however, how accurately they could gauge peoples ages if there was a bug in the Fab system and all age data on profiles vanished!
I suspect they'd just go by the pretty pictures and make a judgement call based on those.......
A"
I agree , I think preferences are one thing, hard limits with age guitars are different so it is possible to use fab in that that aligns with your general preferences but stay open to being wrong occasionally. Some people choose not to , they use age as a message filter, that’s their right and no one should moan about that , it’s a form of ageism though. |
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There's certain levels of maturity and I wouldn't feel comfortable sleeping with someone 20 years younger than myself we wouldn't be on the same wavelength, same with older I wouldn't want to sleep with someone old enough to be my mother |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"There's certain levels of maturity and I wouldn't feel comfortable sleeping with someone 20 years younger than myself we wouldn't be on the same wavelength, same with older I wouldn't want to sleep with someone old enough to be my mother"
I understand that completely. 20 years is a sizeable age gap and if, let's say you're around 40 then that's a world of life experience apart.
That said. When I was in my late 30's I got chatting to a woman in a bar whilst away working. Things progressed to drinks elsewhere and we ended up back at my hotel.
I assumed she was mid 20's. Next morning over coffee she told me she was heading straight off to a uni lecture and was 19. I really wouldn't have guessed. We'd had a fun evening and night and she appeared (and came across as much older). Theoretically I was old enough to be her dad. Now I wouldn't have contacted someone that age on here but it was a chance meeting in the real world. One enjoyed by both parties, fully consensual and we never met again.
Much like notvevery 40 year old looks the same, neither does everyone 20something and maturity isn't defined entirely by the number of candles on your birthday cake.
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