FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > All one sided
All one sided
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there. |
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"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there. "
Be realistic there are thousands of men ti women on here !
Also it’s a swinging site but a shag site - maybe your view point on swinging is off ? Just a thought |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there. "
I disagree. The problem I have is finding men that have any text other than "just ask" on their profile or photos otber than their extreme cock close ups. I fully get people not wanting to show their face but I'm not going to message someone then discover I'm not attracted to them and get branded a "time waster". |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
"
Mostly BS.
I’m not Jason Mamoa, I’m not VWE, I haven’t done any chasing, yet…….I’ve met many wonderful people here.
Go figure. |
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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago
Not all that North of North London |
I suspect your description of the site as a shag site possibly, even if unintentionally reflects how you communicate with people on here and that in turn may reflect on your success? But that's just me speculating |
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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago
Stoke area |
"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there. "
You call this a shag site  .
I'll not discuss that. Majority of ladies browse profiles in ninja mode, so it doesn't show that they have viewed your profile.
Once they read your profile, there's possibly something that doesn't appeal.
Maybe you need to try a social or a club if you aren't doing well on Fab, however you've only been on here a very short time. Your moaning post won't do you any favours. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Who says you have to?
Pxx
Have to what sorry?
Do all the things you stated in your post...
Pxx"
Pretty much most of the profiles I have read. I just see it as all one sided. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Who says you have to?
Pxx
Have to what sorry?
Do all the things you stated in your post...
Pxx
Pretty much most of the profiles I have read. I just see it as all one sided."
So just ignore those profiles then. Just because some want you to jump through hoops, they'll be plenty on the site that don't. No one is making you do anything.
Pxx |
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By *sm265Woman
over a year ago
Shangri-la |
I'm not interested in VWE, in fact I generally avoid anyone who thinks the size of their penis is the most important thing about them. I also don't find Jason Mamoa attractive so if they look like him I'd probably avoid.
The quality of their profile means far more to me than their initial message because if the profile doesn't spark my interest I'm very unlikely to even read their message.
I regularly send a first message to profiles that I find interesting and have had some excellent conversations and some successful meets as a result. Unfortunately there are also a lot of profiles that show very little effort though so i just scroll on by.
If what you are doing isn't getting the results you want then change your approach |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there. "
Who is Doris?
Women may have looked, you just don't know.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I suspect your description of the site as a shag site possibly, even if unintentionally reflects how you communicate with people on here and that in turn may reflect on your success? But that's just me speculating"
I’d agree with the above poster. |
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"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there. "
If your profile is practically empty then it will be discarded. Plus usernames deter people often.
Your profile is very poorly put together with information / pics is most probably why. Look at some guys profiles that do well and see about replicating bits into your vibe
Also the site is very stacked for men as so many of you |
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I message women who I like and who would possibly like me. If someone’s after a hot sexy hunk that’s not me so I won’t message them. If they state in their profile 20 odd dos and don’t in an opening message (and there are a few) then I won’t message them.That’s up to them tho,I don’t sweat it.
NOW,If someone’s after someone downright hilarious….I’m your man  |
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"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there. "
And here we go again another moaning newbie
Yes your message needs to stand out cos even I get something like around 100 per day! I’m hardly a young nubile thing either!
I’ve never been into muscular Jason momoa types, not into vwe (tend to actively avoid if anything! Average all the way)
I view in stealth mode because if I don’t I get hundreds more messages!
I don’t message first usually as I find that with guys that can make them…over eager, sometimes will message women or couples.
Yes you need to earn a reply from me -
More than one badly taken pic
Verification in person not just cam as I’ve found those with cam only veris tend to be voyeurs and not actually meet
Bio needs to be well considered and informative, tell me what you’re offering not just what you want. If you say you’re “not fussy” that indicates you don’t care who you meet.
If there are any drug refs, bare play indicators or similar I will block |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I get that it's difficult on here, but what is your complaint exactly? That all the thousands of other men are cock blocking you because they outnumber women 100 to 1? Or that women are not making enough effort in return for your efforts? Either way there's nothing you can do about it. All you can do is make your profile as attractive as possible, and judging by what people on here are saying, there's room for improvement. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's probably crap as a single man getting no sex on a sex site. But if the Mrs is fucking around and getting loads of cock it would surely be a bigger slap in the face.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am on a number of sites and I do hear from some guys that women want them to jump through hoops. But...you don't have to do that.
There are women who don't expect guys to do that. Nor be built like Jason Momoa. Or be VWE. I don't. I would just like to talk to respectful, genuine men who are reasonably intelligent. And don't call Fab a shag site.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s not all one side as on the flip side
woman and tv/ts need to spend a day and hafe getting ready
You know we got to shave we got to pick out a outfit
We got to do make up hair and look good
I’m the hopes that a guy turns up and isn’t a 3 pump splat and run
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Who’s Jason mamoa ?
Aquaman just googled him can’t see the attraction myself 
Me neither tbh mate "
Same here, I'd have to sit on that face it's far to hideous yo look at ;-p |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there.
Who is Doris?
Women may have looked, you just don't know. "
The Doris is my wife. When I was younger my brother, his friend were seeing someone different every other week and couldn’t remember names so just use to ask “How’s it going with the Doris” haha it has just stuck with me. |
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"It’s not all one side as on the flip side
woman and tv/ts need to spend a day and hafe getting ready
You know we got to shave we got to pick out a outfit
We got to do make up hair and look good
I’m the hopes that a guy turns up and isn’t a 3 pump splat and run
"
This post made me smile - but so very true! |
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"Who’s Jason mamoa ?
Aquaman just googled him can’t see the attraction myself
Me neither tbh mate
Same here, I'd have to sit on that face it's far to hideous yo look at ;-p "
Although some say I look like him!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It’s not all one side as on the flip side
woman and tv/ts need to spend a day and hafe getting ready
You know we got to shave we got to pick out a outfit
We got to do make up hair and look good
I’m the hopes that a guy turns up and isn’t a 3 pump splat and run
This post made me smile - but so very true! "
Your welcome and yip it is that |
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I'm not vwe. I'm a ginger minger and nothing like Jason and I'm also closer to 60 than 50.
I don't chase and never have done as those who have expected me to have discovered.
I don't blow smoke up anyone's arse and I continue to paddle my own canoe without a fab instruction manual.
I haven't sent a first contact message since Feb 2020 and yet despite all of the above women get in touch and have conversations.
I do the heavy lifting in my profile and forum engagement and that encourages women to get in touch because they have some idea of who I am and that I am approachable.
Those that make the effort to read my profile and see that it is consistent with what I say on here like that I don't jump through hoops or bend over backwards. That's part of the appeal so I strongly disagree with everything you have said. |
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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago
Hull |
"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there. "
Viewing your post then taking a peek at your profile, you appear to possess the wrong ideas about this site.
You've only been here by a few weeks. Did you find FAB by accident, or did you hear about it from other misinformed people.
This site isn't, as you eloquently describe it, another Shag Site! It's a Swingers Site!
There's a huge difference between your perception and the reality of this site's theme, about which you have a heck of a lot to learn.
Yes, it's tough for single guys, has been for years, but the pandemic hasn't helped.
You could be successful, just as many Single Males are, but it all depends on how your approach and style evolve in appealing to those you wish to attract.
Good luck, you need it! |
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Meh.
Don't want to be seen as "a shag"
Much prefer to be seen as someone who the person I'm meeting has some iota of respect for as a human, as someone who is pretty good company and not just with my knickers off, as someone who's a person first and foremost and IF, they're not a twat with a shitty, entitled, expectant attitude, then just maybe they'll get a whiff of minge. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Now that, you can blame it on the single men.
Supply and demand.
It's over saturated and therefore you've lots of competition.
That's not a dig, we've done our fare share of meeting men and not yet managed to meet a couple or single woman.
I'm just stating the obvious. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there. "
the fact that you can’t decide if you are I or we would put us off |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there. the fact that you can’t decide if you are I or we would put us off"
I assume he's referring to both his single profile and his couple profile.
Maybe even the profile of his Mrs |
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Your profile says your wife has her own profile and has successfully met other men. Has she read your profile ? Has she seen your displayed photo ? Have you asked her for feedback ? She could give you an insight into what she sees as a profile, that she views as one to maybe engage with and reply to ? |
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"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there. "
I've always found that having a great personality is enough for most women...
Cal |
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Don’t treat it like a shag site. I’m not interested in VWE, just guys that have respect and a bit of honesty. That goes a long way. Also being a swinging site it is important to accept the no’s, consent is the number one rule. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ahh… the old “it’s a shag site” thing.
I think the biggest issue there is that a lot of single women on here are here for the swinging lifestyle.
Whereas a lot of the single men (not all) on here are looking for a quick and easy shag.
It also doesn’t help that fab is 75% single men, with only 25% couples, single women and others.
So IF the single women of fab want to be picky and choose our sexual partners by our own standards, then that is both our choice and right to do so. If you have issues with that, then it’s your problem. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there. "
It’s not a shag site! You can pay for those elsewhere. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It’s not all one side as on the flip side
woman and tv/ts need to spend a day and hafe getting ready
You know we got to shave we got to pick out a outfit
We got to do make up hair and look good
I’m the hopes that a guy turns up and isn’t a 3 pump splat and run
"
Thank you!!!!!! well said |
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"Ahh.... The Doris is getting more action and he's not happy! Makes sense. "
With 3 weeks under his belt and a great understanding of the site, you'd think he'd be knee deep in clunge by now.
Winston |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personally I look at this site as something that might add to the journey of life we are all on and don't depend upon it.
The shag site comment is a issue first of all but others have already mentioned why that was dumb.
The ratio on here is 70% single men so like anything where there is alot of choice you get to have that benefit.
You also need to look at it from the female perspective, 70% men means lots and lots of ing out constant messages.
So most can be forgiven for creating a harder exterior when it comes to engaging with new folks.
The downside is they will undoubtedly also miss the few that are genuine because of the high amount of shit they have to walk through.
So in conclusion, try tinder or a local bar, they might be more accommodating.
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By *oo..Woman
over a year ago
Boo's World |
I don't like Jason and I'm not a huge fan of massive cock's either.
Also my profile doesn't have a description of what any man has to look like before they contact me....
Because I can't be arsed to write one all over again
I think attitude and the art of conversation in life gets all of us further than a write up on these things anyway |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally I look at this site as something that might add to the journey of life we are all on and don't depend upon it.
The shag site comment is a issue first of all but others have already mentioned why that was dumb.
The ratio on here is 70% single men so like anything where there is alot of choice you get to have that benefit.
You also need to look at it from the female perspective, 70% men means lots and lots of ing out constant messages.
So most can be forgiven for creating a harder exterior when it comes to engaging with new folks.
The downside is they will undoubtedly also miss the few that are genuine because of the high amount of shit they have to walk through.
So in conclusion, try tinder or a local bar, they might be more accommodating.
"
well said ..also most of the ladies use the forum as a filter so posts like this means you've already been filtered out by some by means of block or adding a nice note on how you come across. |
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If your using this like tinder you have got it all wrong.
And to post that men have it hard etc it makes you look salty.
Tip join in the forums chat over time you will attract the right people.
You wouldn't walk into a pub look around go up and say "i like what I see you wanna come to place".
Im not very good at typing away im more of a face to face as I feel what I type don't really show what Im really about.
But I just try and relay my personality through typing. If people like me then great if not no loss because I didn't have it in the first. |
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"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there. "
You poor thing. Women won't line up to give you sex just because you want it. You have to appeal to women to get their attention and they won't just shag everybody so you all get a turn.
My heart bleeds for you. |
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"I suspect your description of the site as a shag site possibly, even if unintentionally reflects how you communicate with people on here and that in turn may reflect on your success? But that's just me speculating"
Agreed! |
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By *adyBugsWoman
over a year ago
cognito |
Not to poo poo on your little rant here OP but I call bullshit.
No one is obligated to do anything either way…men, women or other identities.
I’d suggest taking a long hard look at your own attitude before putting blame on others for not getting what you desire out of this place. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If your using this like tinder you have got it all wrong.
And to post that men have it hard etc it makes you look salty.
Tip join in the forums chat over time you will attract the right people.
You wouldn't walk into a pub look around go up and say "i like what I see you wanna come to place".
Im not very good at typing away im more of a face to face as I feel what I type don't really show what Im really about.
But I just try and relay my personality through typing. If people like me then great if not no loss because I didn't have it in the first."
I love the phrase "makes you look salty".  |
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"Not to poo poo on your little rant here OP but I call bullshit.
No one is obligated to do anything either way…men, women or other identities.
I’d suggest taking a long hard look at your own attitude before putting blame on others for not getting what you desire out of this place. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there.
I disagree. The problem I have is finding men that have any text other than "just ask" on their profile or photos otber than their extreme cock close ups. I fully get people not wanting to show their face but I'm not going to message someone then discover I'm not attracted to them and get branded a "time waster". "
mine doesn't |
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"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there.
You poor thing. Women won't line up to give you sex just because you want it. You have to appeal to women to get their attention and they won't just shag everybody so you all get a turn.
My heart bleeds for you. "
And if they did shag everybody.... plenty of folk would never get a turn. I'm assuming we're going on a first come first served grab a ticket basis, that's the fairest right? So, going by 1 a day (yep, I'm even allowing rag week shags here, not missing a day for sickness or anything) I'll get round to the OP in *does some quick maths* ... 365 days a year, average of 10 a day, average of 50 when a new photo goes up, plus the 1000 per day for the 3 days my pic was top of page 2 hot photos, plus the couple of thousand in the first few days of joining....
Erm yeah, get to the OP in about 15 years. If I'm still alive by then. |
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I have never been head hunted. So if I want a new job I have to do all the running. I have to write a compelling cv with an interesting and relevant cover letter. Why can't the employers do all the work? |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there. "
Nope. Blokes just have to be a little more patient sometimes.
No bending over required unless they want to.
There are hundreds of really interesting male profiles that catch the eye, draw you in, describe the owner well and list what they're looking for, have a variety of well taken, interesting and attractive photos and who send messages deserving of a reply.
And then there are the rest. That one quick glance at will explain completely why they get no interest, no replies and no meets.
A |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there. "
Basic economics mate. We men are sitting on the wrong side of supply and demand graph.You can change the facts unfortunately. |
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I get the feeling mate, but just be patient. The ratio of men to women on here is probably like 10:1. Make your profile stand out, send a nice message, no dick pics unless they request it, send a friendly face pic when messaging first, and again, be patient. If they don't reply, who cares just leave it. If they don't reply to the first message after seeing it, take the hint and don't send a second message. I've been lucky enough to meet lots of people on here just through being patient |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Men have to make messages interesting, funny, stand out. Men have to be VWE, built like Jason Mamoa. Men have to do all the chasing but get deleted if you send a 2nd message. Men have to be exactly as described in woman’s profiles.
Not once in the few months have I/we had a single view from a single woman that we haven’t looked at before or messaged first. Everything is one sided and the blokes have to bend over backwards to even get a single reply. Just the same as any other shag site out there.
Who is Doris?
Women may have looked, you just don't know.
The Doris is my wife. When I was younger my brother, his friend were seeing someone different every other week and couldn’t remember names so just use to ask “How’s it going with the Doris” haha it has just stuck with me."
Aww that's sweet.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Having reread the thread, I feel we are being too judgemental on the OP. We are all jaded forumers who have seen this all before.
But the OP has posisbly joined at the same time as his old Doris, who may have made no effort, and is swimming in dick.
He may feel has had made 200x more effort and has come up sucking his thumb.
I suspect many new joiners don't pick up on the gender ratio. Wont realise the admin side if you aren't a single male. And won't realsie just how generic their fab CV is. It's not until you are an employer not employee that understand what makes a CV stand out.
OP, and anyone similar, suggest you acknowledge this was a bit of a rant and not a good look. And start a thread seeking feedback. But remember, be true to yourself while being the best version of you. |
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