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Grey Squirrel Madness
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Plans by eco types to lure grey squirrels into traps with hazelnut spread laced with contraceptives. Why not just shoot the buggers?"
Because we're not yanks armed to the teeth and this way the little squizzels get to eat chocolate and fuck themselves silly without having the expense of raising kids.
What a fucking life!!! 
A |
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It's not actually going to be put into practice for another 2 years though.
Majority of the ones down here are shot, I can't see the contraception being popular because of the red squirrel population and young tree plantations we have down here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's not actually going to be put into practice for another 2 years though.
Majority of the ones down here are shot, I can't see the contraception being popular because of the red squirrel population and young tree plantations we have down here"
We still have red squirrels?
I thought they were all long gone. |
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"It's not actually going to be put into practice for another 2 years though.
Majority of the ones down here are shot, I can't see the contraception being popular because of the red squirrel population and young tree plantations we have down here
We still have red squirrels?
I thought they were all long gone."
They clung on in scotland and have subsequently been reintroduced to wooded areas around the country |
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"It's not actually going to be put into practice for another 2 years though.
Majority of the ones down here are shot, I can't see the contraception being popular because of the red squirrel population and young tree plantations we have down here"
They are looking at ways of ensuring Reds don't take the contraception before they roll it out. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's not actually going to be put into practice for another 2 years though.
Majority of the ones down here are shot, I can't see the contraception being popular because of the red squirrel population and young tree plantations we have down here
They are looking at ways of ensuring Reds don't take the contraception before they roll it out. "
Reds are fierce, and will have those nuts in a flash  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The better plan would be to give the red squirrels guns...let them kill the grey squirrels off.."
The problem isn’t guns. It’s lack of good squirrels with guns to defend against the lone crazy squirrel. |
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"The better plan would be to give the red squirrels guns...let them kill the grey squirrels off..
The problem isn’t guns. It’s lack of good squirrels with guns to defend against the lone crazy squirrel."
2nd amendment for squirrels? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There’s a squirrel in the woods behind my flat that’s now the size of a Jack Russel thanks to everybody feeding him over lockdown. Good luck taking him down. |
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"It's not actually going to be put into practice for another 2 years though.
Majority of the ones down here are shot, I can't see the contraception being popular because of the red squirrel population and young tree plantations we have down here
They are looking at ways of ensuring Reds don't take the contraception before they roll it out. "
The other thing they have to consider is that people still eat squirrel |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"It's not actually going to be put into practice for another 2 years though.
Majority of the ones down here are shot, I can't see the contraception being popular because of the red squirrel population and young tree plantations we have down here
They are looking at ways of ensuring Reds don't take the contraception before they roll it out.
The other thing they have to consider is that people still eat squirrel"
Understandable given the price of other meat such as venison.
It's deer.
A
*I'll get my coat |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The better plan would be to give the red squirrels guns...let them kill the grey squirrels off..
The problem isn’t guns. It’s lack of good squirrels with guns to defend against the lone crazy squirrel.
2nd amendment for squirrels? "
How else will they defend themselves against tyranny? |
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We should eat more (Grey) Squirrel  .
BBQ Squirrel
Roast Squirrel & Yorkshire pud.
Squirrel kebabs
Squirrel burgers
Squirrel curry
British Meat Marketing Board slogan could be :
A Grey a day, keeps the bastards at bay.
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"And how do the squirrels feel about this? They live in a democratic country and have the right not to be controlled by human dictatorships and intervention. "
They're just trying to survive in this God forsaken world. |
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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago
Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else |
"And how do the squirrels feel about this? They live in a democratic country and have the right not to be controlled by human dictatorships and intervention.
They're just trying to survive in this God forsaken world."
They're doing fine in the US, where they're from. But over here they've almost completely eliminated the native red squirrel..which is also just trying to survive. |
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"We should eat more (Grey) Squirrel .
BBQ Squirrel
Roast Squirrel & Yorkshire pud.
Squirrel kebabs
Squirrel burgers
Squirrel curry
British Meat Marketing Board slogan could be :
A Grey a day, keeps the bastards at bay.
"
Squirrel stir fry
Squirrel sausages
|
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"We should eat more (Grey) Squirrel .
BBQ Squirrel
Roast Squirrel & Yorkshire pud.
Squirrel kebabs
Squirrel burgers
Squirrel curry
British Meat Marketing Board slogan could be :
A Grey a day, keeps the bastards at bay.
Squirrel stir fry
Squirrel sausages
"
I could make the Sausages |
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"And how do the squirrels feel about this? They live in a democratic country and have the right not to be controlled by human dictatorships and intervention. "
I agree, it sounds a bit dystopian. And Beatrix Potter didn't see it coming either |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Funniest post i have read in a long time
Well done all and please keep it going
are there going to be field hospitals with injured squirrels in with all these gun touting squirrels about !! |
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"And how do the squirrels feel about this? They live in a democratic country and have the right not to be controlled by human dictatorships and intervention.
They're just trying to survive in this God forsaken world.
They're doing fine in the US, where they're from. But over here they've almost completely eliminated the native red squirrel..which is also just trying to survive."
Reservations for red squirrels? |
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"We should eat more (Grey) Squirrel .
BBQ Squirrel
Roast Squirrel & Yorkshire pud.
Squirrel kebabs
Squirrel burgers
Squirrel curry
British Meat Marketing Board slogan could be :
A Grey a day, keeps the bastards at bay.
Squirrel stir fry
Squirrel sausages
I could make the Sausages "
You can slip me a sausage |
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"And how do the squirrels feel about this? They live in a democratic country and have the right not to be controlled by human dictatorships and intervention.
They're just trying to survive in this God forsaken world.
They're doing fine in the US, where they're from. But over here they've almost completely eliminated the native red squirrel..which is also just trying to survive.
Reservations for red squirrels? "
Or rather native UK squirrels... |
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"And how do the squirrels feel about this? They live in a democratic country and have the right not to be controlled by human dictatorships and intervention.
I agree, it sounds a bit dystopian. And Beatrix Potter didn't see it coming either"
George Orwell did |
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"So........
When all the squirrels are in cages...
mmmm what are they going to do with them ?
Restaurants ?
Pre-stuffed with Nutella.
I don't think that stops them having sex."
If they eat too much they won't feel like it? Nobody does on a full stomach |
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By *J GeminiTV/TS
over a year ago
Northumberland |
Ok, time to be blunt!
Red squirrels are a native breed.
Grays are not, they were imported in the early 1900s.
The grays carry squirrel pox which kills the reds.
Here in the North as else where in the country we trap the grays and shot them.
Unfortunately we are losing too many reds as one grey can wipe out a colony of reds with the pox.
It's a grim task.
Xx
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"The better plan would be to give the red squirrels guns...let them kill the grey squirrels off..
The problem isn’t guns. It’s lack of good squirrels with guns to defend against the lone crazy squirrel."
All it takes is one good red squirrel with a gun to stop a bad gray squirrel with its nuts |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Good luck shooting over 2 million squirrels!
Doesn't exactly seem very efficient to me, unlike these traps which could easily be deployed all over the place."
Small game hunting has become de rigueur of late. |
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"Whilst on the subject of eradicating Invasive American species may I also add
American Mink and American Signal Crayfish to the list.
Both of which are doing untold hard to our native species."
This is inevitable though with climate change, look at the tropical birds that are coming over here now, all those asian invasive water plants are thriving |
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By *lynJMan
over a year ago
Morden |
Give the red squirrels longer range weapons so they can repel the unjustified invasion by these power mad grey squirrels.
Report the greys to the ICC for war crimes for using biological weapons. |
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"Give the red squirrels longer range weapons so they can repel the unjustified invasion by these power mad grey squirrels."
Have you gone completely barking mad Sir  We need to give our long range weapons to Ukraine in order to stop that TWAT Putin. |
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"The better plan would be to give the red squirrels guns...let them kill the grey squirrels off..
The problem isn’t guns. It’s lack of good squirrels with guns to defend against the lone crazy squirrel.
2nd amendment for squirrels?
How else will they defend themselves against tyranny?"
There is a painting of british soldiers landing at d-day. The artist left a little easter egg of a rat with a tiny SMLE rifle hidden away in the corner |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's not actually going to be put into practice for another 2 years though.
Majority of the ones down here are shot, I can't see the contraception being popular because of the red squirrel population and young tree plantations we have down here
We still have red squirrels?
I thought they were all long gone.
They clung on in scotland and have subsequently been reintroduced to wooded areas around the
country"
There's also populations around North Yorkshire. |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"It's not actually going to be put into practice for another 2 years though.
Majority of the ones down here are shot, I can't see the contraception being popular because of the red squirrel population and young tree plantations we have down here
We still have red squirrels?
I thought they were all long gone.
They clung on in scotland and have subsequently been reintroduced to wooded areas around the
country
There's also populations around North Yorkshire."
Can't we just dye some of the grey ones red?
I mean, women do it all the time..... 
A |
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"It's not actually going to be put into practice for another 2 years though.
Majority of the ones down here are shot, I can't see the contraception being popular because of the red squirrel population and young tree plantations we have down here
We still have red squirrels?
I thought they were all long gone.
They clung on in scotland and have subsequently been reintroduced to wooded areas around the
country
There's also populations around North Yorkshire."
And Formby..  |
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By *lynJMan
over a year ago
Morden |
"It's not actually going to be put into practice for another 2 years though.
Majority of the ones down here are shot, I can't see the contraception being popular because of the red squirrel population and young tree plantations we have down here
We still have red squirrels?
I thought they were all long gone.
They clung on in scotland and have subsequently been reintroduced to wooded areas around the
country
There's also populations around North Yorkshire.
And Formby.. "
And on the Isle of Wight. |
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