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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Am i being over dramatic when i get messages saying how close we are etc? i just find it quite creepy "
It’s very creepy and it’s a regular occurrence.
Immediate block for me. |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Am i being over dramatic when i get messages saying how close we are etc? i just find it quite creepy "
Turn off the 'who's near' facility on your phone and change your location on your profile to something less specific.
Somerset, for example, is a larger area than the teeny tiny village we live in which would identify us in a heartbeat.
A |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Am i being over dramatic when i get messages saying how close we are etc? i just find it quite creepy
Considering you have your who's near turned on I'd say yes, you're being over dramatic. "
So that guys a guy the right to be creepy about being near me? |
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"Am i being over dramatic when i get messages saying how close we are etc? i just find it quite creepy
Considering you have your who's near turned on I'd say yes, you're being over dramatic.
So that guys a guy the right to be creepy about being near me? "
Well no, but it's within your control to stop it happening |
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"Am i being over dramatic when i get messages saying how close we are etc? i just find it quite creepy
Considering you have your who's near turned on I'd say yes, you're being over dramatic.
So that guys a guy the right to be creepy about being near me? "
Why is it creepy? It's not like there saying they're watching you from outside your house. They're just pointing out they're nearby. Men are forever being told to use unique selling points when messaging. They're using a piece of information from your profile that they hope might make you take to them.
It's you that's making it creepy. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Am i being over dramatic when i get messages saying how close we are etc? i just find it quite creepy
Considering you have your who's near turned on I'd say yes, you're being over dramatic.
So that guys a guy the right to be creepy about being near me?
Why is it creepy? It's not like there saying they're watching you from outside your house. They're just pointing out they're nearby. Men are forever being told to use unique selling points when messaging. They're using a piece of information from your profile that they hope might make you take to them.
It's you that's making it creepy. "
Agree to disagree i think theres better ways to get someones attention |
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I agree, I get these and it's a bit creepy, especially on a first message. Plus a total disregard for my profile as it's always men IMO. Also it's very presumptuous. Just because your say within 1/2 a mile doesn't mean your gagging for it, free or even interested. I'm sure for many it's a massive red flag. |
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If only there was a tool for people looking for people who are nearby, to also find people looking for people who are nearby.........
I find it bizarre that people are put out by things that are easily fixed by using the tools the site provides.
Freaked out by people nearby messaging you? Turn it off, problem gone.
Winston
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"Yeah i have turned it off.. turned it back on just to see and boom another message this morning, do guys not realise this is creepy"
A lot of men have no idea that a woman on her own might be alarmed by men who are effectively anonymous saying they're nearby. As long as they're not saying they know who you are it's probably just them pointing out that they're close and has no hidden agenda  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If only there was a tool for people looking for people who are nearby, to also find people looking for people who are nearby.........
I find it bizarre that people are put out by things that are easily fixed by using the tools the site provides.
Freaked out by people nearby messaging you? Turn it off, problem gone.
Winston
"
Im not freaked out, i find it creepy in the way men message saying "we are very close" or "we are nearby" its the tone of the messages, im not saying this isnt a useful tool, just not used in a creepy manner |
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"If only there was a tool for people looking for people who are nearby, to also find people looking for people who are nearby.........
I find it bizarre that people are put out by things that are easily fixed by using the tools the site provides.
Freaked out by people nearby messaging you? Turn it off, problem gone.
Winston
"
1/2 a mile is a huge area, especially in a busy city or urban setting. What you say is true you could turn it off, problem solved. But I think a lot of us are looking for who is near, including OP I assume. The problem is more the behaviour of some people. Especially wanting to pin down someones exact location without any kind of rapport. That is a bit creepy. Yes it's something people have to live with if they want use of the location feature but I think it's perfectly valid point to raise. In an ideal world it would be better if other people modified their creepy behaviour rather than OP restrict her use of site features IMO. However it's a free world and to some people there is no problem to this direct approach. People are free to be a bit creepy and she is free to moan about it which is perfectly valid. |
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We've had messages from people saying they're near when we have the feature enabled (which is rarely). Because there are two of us I feel ok about it but I think if I was alone I might be more wary.
When we use our lap tops with VPN enabled we can appear anywhere in the world  |
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"If only there was a tool for people looking for people who are nearby, to also find people looking for people who are nearby.........
I find it bizarre that people are put out by things that are easily fixed by using the tools the site provides.
Freaked out by people nearby messaging you? Turn it off, problem gone.
Winston
1/2 a mile is a huge area, especially in a busy city or urban setting. What you say is true you could turn it off, problem solved. But I think a lot of us are looking for who is near, including OP I assume. The problem is more the behaviour of some people. Especially wanting to pin down someones exact location without any kind of rapport. That is a bit creepy. Yes it's something people have to live with if they want use of the location feature but I think it's perfectly valid point to raise. In an ideal world it would be better if other people modified their creepy behaviour rather than OP restrict her use of site features IMO. However it's a free world and to some people there is no problem to this direct approach. People are free to be a bit creepy and she is free to moan about it which is perfectly valid."
Hi, I noticed that you're near. I really like your profile, we seem to be looking for the same things. Would you like to chat and see if there's a connection?
Hi, I noticed your near, where exactly are you, I wanna spunk on your tits blow cocksnot up your fartpipe.
Presumably one message would be acceptable and one wouldn't.
It's the content of the message surely?
One might garner a response from us, one would get a block.
If simply getting "I see your near" messages disturbed us, we'd turn it off.
Winston |
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"If only there was a tool for people looking for people who are nearby, to also find people looking for people who are nearby.........
I find it bizarre that people are put out by things that are easily fixed by using the tools the site provides.
Freaked out by people nearby messaging you? Turn it off, problem gone.
Winston
"
All down to the message and the profile it's from, blank profiles only a week old with zilch information will probably be ignored by most.. |
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We get these a number of times…
If we were getting weird ones we’d just block so they can’t see us now.
If they are polite we’ll respond.
But we’d never meet now…unless it was two hot females with lesbian tendencies
K |
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"If only there was a tool for people looking for people who are nearby, to also find people looking for people who are nearby.........
I find it bizarre that people are put out by things that are easily fixed by using the tools the site provides.
Freaked out by people nearby messaging you? Turn it off, problem gone.
Winston
Im not freaked out, i find it creepy in the way men message saying "we are very close" or "we are nearby" its the tone of the messages, im not saying this isnt a useful tool, just not used in a creepy manner"
But there's nothing inherently creepy about those statements on their own. They're facts made possible by your who's near being on. You're adding the tone to them. |
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I had someone think I was in a van on the same carpark as him at a dogging spot the other night. That was funny.
But generally, it is creepy. I change my postcode often. People even think they've seen me on the pub or on the school run... Definitely not me! |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
Ye so find it a bit creepy at times.Especially when I had a guy message me late one night saying he was nearby and as he had bothered to track me within half an mile that I should meet him for sex .Given that I live in a very rural area yes I found that creepy as fuck.
I rarely ever turn that feature on anymore as it's not worth the agro. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If only there was a tool for people looking for people who are nearby, to also find people looking for people who are nearby.........
I find it bizarre that people are put out by things that are easily fixed by using the tools the site provides.
Freaked out by people nearby messaging you? Turn it off, problem gone.
Winston
Im not freaked out, i find it creepy in the way men message saying "we are very close" or "we are nearby" its the tone of the messages, im not saying this isnt a useful tool, just not used in a creepy manner
But there's nothing inherently creepy about those statements on their own. They're facts made possible by your who's near being on. You're adding the tone to them. "
Why shouldnt I have my whos nearby on? I use the site same as everyone else, what i dont do is sit and message guys who are close stating we are close, im not adding the tone the tone is obvious in the message (of which im not allowed to divulge) what i gave was a small insight into the message. |
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